David W. Robinson's Blog: Always Writing, page 51

Two More Releases

You can’t stand still for a minute in this business, but right now, I’m having one of the uppest days I can ever recall.

The release of Voices in paperback went really well yesterday, and by close of play it was making a mark in the Amazon charts.

No sooner is that launched and sailing the stormy seas of fiction, than I received not one but two more contracts this morning. STAC Mysteries, A Murder for Christmas and Murder at the Murder Mystery Weekend are now on the ready line for launch.

A Murder for Christmas will hit the virtual bookstands on October 31st. In time for Halloween if you order it sharp enough, but I already have a Halloween title out. (What do you mean you didn’t know. I’ve been telling you about it for long enough.)

Beyond that, Murder at the Murder Mystery Weekend will burst upon an unsuspecting world on November 23d.

Covers to be announced when I get them.

Now here’s a bonus for you. If you’re thinking of taking a look at the STAC Mysteries, you can do so at a reduced price. The Filey Connection, the very first book, is now on sale at 77p!!!

How’s that for a deal? A full blown murder mystery, chocabloc with good humour and dastardly deeds, and all for less than a quid.

Go on. Treat yourself. You know you want to.

Voices – the Paperback

About ten years ago, I began to lose my hearing. One side effect of it was hearing muttered voices when I’m in a quiet room without my hearing aids. Coming more up to date, about four years ago I fell over an unguarded pothole in a factory yard and broke my ankle.

What, you may well ask, does this have to do with the price of steak and kidney pies? Absolutely nothing, but between Christmas 2008 and the end of January 2009, the two came together at the core of a novel: Voices.

At 120,000 words, it was one of the longest I’ve ever written. Even at 110,000 words to which I edited it, it’s still the longest I’ve ever had published. It’s also a marked divergence from my usual fiction.

Voices is a horror story. But it’s not filled with vampires and werewolves. The monsters in this are monsters of the id; inner demons.

Or are they?

That is what Chris Deacon must decide after he survives a bomb attack on the college where he teaches. He comes through the bombing with a busted ankle and his hearing damaged, but unlike my real life events, he suffered other torments. He is left mute, unable to communicate other than through the keyboard of a Nokia smartphone. And he is a man haunted by grotesque phantoms in the shape of a soldier, Colonel Gun, and a tiny dwarf with an oversized head whom Chris names Egghead.

When his hearing begins to return, he too, hears the Voices, muttering incomprehensibly just under the threshold of audibility. And slowly, they draw him into their web of murder and deceit, a plot which sees other survivors compelled into suicide, which sees his wife’s life threatened, and one of his students and his daughter coming under their malign spell. And all for what? So that the Voices can take their rightful place as masters of humanity.

It is an agonising trail for Chris, leading him from his comfortable, Suburban Mr Average, life into a perilous confrontation in the wilds of Northumberland, where he must surrender to their will or destroy them. And in doing so, possibly destroy himself.

Voices was published this year by Crooked Cat Books, and so far it’s gone down about as well as a steak and kidney pie at a vegetarian convention. I believe the reason is the author’s name. To set it apart from my STAC Mysteries, I used the pen name David Shaw, and it was not a good move.

This is not Crooked Cat’s fault, but mine. I was the one who insisted on the name. Well, I’ve changed my mind, and mercifully, Crooked Cat were in complete agreement on the change. It’s now written by David Robinson.

Notwithstanding its (self inflicted) troubles, Voices has received rave reviews, and now it is due out in paperback.

Launched officially at midnight tonight (4th October) you can now own Voices in both digital and hard copy. The paperback is a hefty read at 390 pages, but if you like quality fiction which blurs the boundaries between psychological thrillers, horror and sci-fi, then Voices will keep you happy for a good many hours.

You can download Voices for the Kindle at Amazon UK and Amazon Worldwide and you can order the paperback from Amazon UK and Amazon Worldwide

We’re Back

And I suppose you want to know how it all went. A bloody disaster. There is no other way to describe it.

On the morning of September 25th, our taxi to the airport arrived early. That was the last piece of good fortune we had. We were at the airport by 3:30 ready for a 6:15 flight. We then learned that the flight was delayed and would not leave until 11:20. Eight bastard hours we would be hanging around the airport.

I’d been in some severe pain in the day or two before departure, so I took a brace of Dihydrocodeine Tartrate. This is powerful stuff, and it has some unpleasant side effects, but I’d calculated that we would be airborne before the drowsiness and nausea kicked in. Thanks to the delay I was still in the departure area, and at 6:30, my wife was sufficiently concerned to call for help. Enter one paramedic, who, to be fair, was only doing his job, and talked about carting me off to A & E at Wythenshawe Hospital. I may have been pissed on those pills, but I wasn’t having that, so we shouted for a pharmacist who sold me an anti-emetic to counteract the nausea of the dihydrocodeine. They left me to sleep it off.

At last we got going, and it was a comfortable flight, even though the captain warned us of turbulence over the Pyrenees. We finally hit our apartment at 4:30 in the afternoon thirteen hours after he had got to the airport. And then came the major disaster. Somewhere en route, I lost my phone.

If it had been a pay as you go, I wouldn’t have bothered, but it wasn’t. It was a contract. The resort reps could not have been more helpful. They were brilliant, but my phone didn’t show up. So I reluctantly decided to call T-Moblie and block the number. What followed turned this disaster into a full blow Irwin Allen/James Cameron production

My wife’s PAYG had about £5 credit. Rather than use that, I tried a payphone first. It cost me £2, read that again TWO POUNDS!!! Just to listen to it ringing at the other end. No one answered. I paid to hear it ringing out. So I resorted to my wife’s mobile. After numerous attempts and being cut off once, I got through, explained the situation and the operator put me through to the correct extension. Only he didn’t. He cut me off, too.

By now, the wife’s phone had no credit, so I went online and spent 10€ (about £9) trying to top it up. After the first attempt, I received a text from T-Mobile saying the top up had not been authorised by my credit card company, and I still had no credit. I tried again. Failed. Third attempt I used a different credit card. Failed. Fourth attempt I finally topped up the wife’s mobile to the tune of £40. But when I checked the credit, there was not £40 but £80 on it.

The first failed attempt hadn’t failed, it had succeeded. Who the fuck puts £80 on a PAYG mobile?

Putting that question aside, I rang them again and after an interminable wait, I finally got through and put a block on my missing mobile, and that call cost me another £9.

All up it took almost six hours and I spent £14 on mobile calls, £2 on duff payphone calls, £9 on internet charges and £80 topping up a mobile phone. Grand total: £105. Read that again, ONE HUNDRED AND FIVE POUNDS!!!! Just to block a missing phone. T-Mobile, thy name art shit in this house and your people will need to do some serious grovelling tomorrow to stop me going elsewhere.

You would think that I’d had enough punishment, wouldn’t you?  Oh no. Some bastard up there really has it in for me. The weather was some of the worst I’ve seen in Majorca as the cloud  below will demonstrate.

We had three days of rain, the nights were perishing cold and I caught a mild chest infection which will necessitate a visit to my doctor this week. The accommodation was fine, but the site was rubbish. Set in the middle of nowhere, they sold only cheap, local beer, there was nowhere to get a decent meal and no late night takeaway. To cap all that, the entertainment was the bog standard Butlins variety aimed at kids. And we all know hoe much I love children. They’re great on toast, but I couldn’t manage whole one.

When we got back to Manchester yesterday afternoon, it was pissing down (what else is new?) but I can honestly say I was never happier to see Beetham Towers from the air.

Flying Out

There’s something depressing about three o’clock in the morning, but tomorrow, it will be different. That’s the time we leave Festung Flatcap and make for the airport.

Yes we are orf on a week’s holiday, and by the time you lot are getting up to another grim day, we’ll be greeting the sunrise at 30-something thousand feet. By the time you tuck your feet under your desk, we’ll be baking in the Balearics (it’s quite legal, you know).

But I wouldn’t want you to think it’s all fun and games. Dear me, no. Joe Murray, eponymous sleuth of my STAC Mystery series, has to go to Majorca for his Valentine outing next year, so I shall be doing quite a bit of research while I’m over there: how expensive is the beer, how good is the beer, how accessible is the beer?

Being a caterer, Joe will undoubtedly need to know about the food, too. Not that he’s likely to start selling paella and chips at the Lazy Luncheonette, but he’ll want to know whether the Majorcan chefs understand the principle of a steak and kidney pie.

Mrs R absolutely forbids internet access when we’re on holiday, but she doesn’t mind me taking the netbook along, so I’ll be planning some sneak previews of the two STAC titles to come before the Valentine novel.

While we’re on the subject of STAC, the paperback of A Halloween Homicide will be released this coming Friday. Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on your point of view) I’ll be 900 miles away from all the fuss, but I’m sure my friends at Crooked Cat Books will let you know all about it.

And that’s about it. For those of you in the UK, I hope you cope with the vicious weather that’s just floated in from the Atlantic. If I can think on, while I’m enjoying unremitting sunshine, I’ll try find a few moments to feel guilty.

But don’t hold your breath.

Flatcap Airborne

We’re zooming off to Majorca in a couple of days. You may guess we like travelling, but the downside with foreign holidays is you have to fly there and with that in mind, here’s a tale from my old mate, Flatcap.

I don’t like flying.

It’s not fear of flying. I made a study of it years ago and I know exactly what’s going on most of the time.

For example, at a certain altitude (somewhere above 135 feet) you’ll hear the engines die off. They are not cutting out. The driver has simply shifted into fifth gear and he doesn’t need to lay the pedal to metal anymore. It’s a bit like reaching 70mph on the motorway. You don’t need your toe hard down to maintain it, unless you’re still in third gear, in which case you’d better plan on stopping at every other service station to top up the tanks, especially if you’re going on a long journey. Well it’s the same with a plane, except that there aren’t many service stations at 35,000 feet. Come to that, there aren’t many on the M6 North of Chorley, so there’s hope yet.

To make turns, the pilot turns the wheel one way or the other, just as you do in your car, but instead of turning the front wheels, it operates the ailerons which make the aircraft tilt, changing the centre of gravity and pushing it into a turn. Afterwards, he pulls the ailerons the other way to right the aircraft. On my car, you turn the wheel, the car tilts and turns, you straighten the wheel and it goes straight ahead, but it still tilts because the rear springs are shot.

Naturally the pilot of a modern aircraft doesn’t do most of the work. His autopilot does it for him. The last time I left the car on autopilot, we almost ran through the front windows of a butcher’s outside Tesco.

Flying is incredibly safe. The pilot has any number of onboard warning systems to tell him when things are going to go wrong before they actually do go wrong. My car has a diagnostic system, too, but it tends to tell me when things are going wrong after they’ve done so. What is the point of a warning that flashes “ABS failure imminent” when your bonnet is already embedded in the back doors of that van in front?

It’s a long time ago, but I’ll never forget the first time we flew. Cheapo Airlines, they were called. They flew from Cheapo Airport, a flattish meadow just outside Wilmslow. I was lucky. I got a seat next to the parachute store. Service was a bit slow, but like the stewardess said, the kettle takes longer to boil on a couple of heavy duty car batteries.

We didn’t get to any great altitude, either. The pilot kept swooping upwards to avoid high-sided vehicles on the M5, and how he missed that container ship under the Severn Bridge I’ll never know, but according to the co-pilot, they had to go that low to take on water to fill the aforementioned kettle.

I couldn’t understand the bomb-aimer’s role, so being the nosy sod that I was, I asked. And then wished I hadn’t.

“Very simple, sir,” he said. “We have to be careful where we empty the lavatory.”

Luck was on our side again when they served lunch. Because we were near the front, we got served first and our chips were cooked. By the time they’d dealt with us, the bottle on the primus stove had run out of gas.

We weren’t so lucky coming home ten days later. One of the headlights was out, a copper on the A1 spotted it, and we had to have a whip round for the driver to pay the fine.

We missed the landing field, too. Apparently someone had forgotten to buy batteries for the lamps to light the runway. We ended up in a pasture outside Macclesfield and had to get a bus to Wilmslow to pick up the car.

Naturally I put in a complaint when we got home, but the company wrote back asking, “What do you expect for £17.50?”

It taught me a lesson. These days, I save the cost of the paper, envelope and stamp.

Paperback Paperback Paperback

The postman has just called. Only one item and no bills.

Instead he’s left me a paperback copy of A Halloween Homicide. It’s not officially released until Friday of next week, but as the author, I get a copy in advance. Come on, I need something. I mean you should see what I earn. (No, madam, I am not about to tell you. I’m simply moaning.)

Today being my 31st wedding anniversary, I also needed something to cheer me up, and the arrival of said tome, has done the job nicely, thank you.

So here you are. All three STAC Mysteries propped up in front of the machine upon which they were created, while the machine shows the same covers, topped off with the exterior of the Lazy Luncheonette.

And before you start looking for the Lazy Luncheonette, don’t bother. Like the town of Sanford in West Yorkshire, it doesn’t exist. I photoshopped it.

The STAC Mysteries are beginning to show themselves in the world of whodunits, so if you like a good mystery, one tinged with good humour, get yourselves over to your favourite online bookstore and order your copies now, while they’re fresh and hot.

The STAC Mysteries:

The Filey Connection Amazon UK | Amazon Worldwide | Smashwords | Crooked Cat Store | Paperback

The I-Spy Murders Amazon UK | Amazon Worldwide | Smashwords | Crooked Cat Store | Paperback

A Halloween Homicide Amazon UK | Amazon Worldwide | Smashwords | Crooked Cat Store | Paperback

A Murder for Christmas** Amazon UK | Amazon Worldwide | Smashwords

**A Murder for Christmas will not be available from Crooked Cat until mid-late October.

Sampling The Goods

One of the great things about e-books is sampling. You can read anything up to the first 10% of the work before buying. Imagine if you did that in a bookstore.

Security: What are you doing?

You: Just reading the first 30 pages, see whether I might enjoy the rest of it.

Clunk: the sound of you hitting the pavement after the security throws you out with the words, “we are not a bleeding library.”

So Amazon, Smashwords et al, have it right in my opinion, the only drawback being you can only read the opening of the book. If you pick up one with a whole heap of information, contents page, copyrights, dedications and so on, your 10% could be up by the time you get to: Chapter One. It was a dark and stormy night…

Even if you can get into the tale, there’s no telling that it won’t fade come the middle.

Enter Crooked Cat Books.

I think I was the third author Crooked Cat signed up, but that was only because Cathie Dunn (Dark Deceit) knew about them before me, and my old mate Trevor Belshaw (Tracy’s Hot Mail) works faster than me. Regardless, I’ve been there since the beginning and as regular readers will know, I’m never slow to take advantage of any innovation or opportunity.

When, therefore, Steph set up a WordPress blog where the authors could post samples of their work, guess which appeared first. That’s right: The Filey Connection.

Other authors quickly followed and as I write, there are samples from Cathie’s historical novel, Dark Deceit, Michela O’Brien’s contemporary Playing on Cotton Clouds, and Nancy Jardine’s Celtic tale, The Beltane Choice. There will be more to follow (another two extracts from STAC Mysteries, for sure).

For obvious reasons, we haven’t posted the openings. Considering you can read those on Amazon, Smashwords and so on, it would be redundant. For my part, I’ve chosen a short section from the middle of the The Filey Connection, and other authors are offering similar insights into their works.

The samples are open to anyone to read, and you can comment and even vote on the extracts if you want.

So take yourself over the Crooked Cat’s Cradle and take a look at what’s on offer. You never know, you may just be tempted.

Went the Day Well…ish

Yesterday, September 14th, was a day of highs and lows.

Arthritic knees ensured that I didn’t sleep over the night of 13th-14th, so with the launch of A Halloween Homicide first thing Friday, I was already exhausted when I got the online party going. And no sooner had the event kicked off than I had to leave. I had to go to the hospital for a blood test. Kiss goodbye to the next three hours.

By the time I got back, I was dropping on my feet, but the party was warming up and I had to contribute my share. I dropped out again at half past one, and took a nap on the settee. Two minutes later, Joe, my crackpot Jack Russell, decided it was playtime and jumped on my legs. Hurling abuse at the dumb mutt, I managed about 45 minutes sleep and then it was back to the party. In between times, my left ankle started hurting and when I checked it, it had swollen to about three times its usual size. So by late afternoon, not only was I exhausted and suffering my usual pain, but I was also limping like Long John Silver… without the parrot.

I finally called it a draw and was in bed for ten last night. A decent night’s sleep ensured that I’m as fresh as yesterday’s milk this morning; still tired but less robotic.

In amongst all this chaos it was quite easy to forget that yesterday was actually a double celebration. A Halloween Homicide was added to the growing list of Sanford 3rd Age Club Mysteries under the Crooked Cat banner, and The I-Spy Murders was released in paperback.

I already have my advance copy of The I-Spy Murders, and I’m seriously impressed with the quality, layout and binding on this book. The story’s not bad, either.

Which brings me nicely to the point of today’s post. Frances di Plino, author of the riveting thriller, Bad Moon Rising, reviewed The I-Spy Murders and you can read her opinion right here (no spoilers).

The paperback of A Halloween Homicide is scheduled for release on September 28th, but I won’t be leading the party then. Instead, I shall be sitting on a beach in the Balearics, soaking up the sun and counting my ill-gotten gains

***

You can find A Halloween Homicide at Amazon UK | Amazon Worldwide | Smashwords | Crooked Cat Store

You can find The I-Spy Murders at Amazon UK | Amazon Worldwide | Smashwords | Crooked Cat Store

And if you’d rather have the paperbacks, The I-Spy Murders can be found here and The Filey Connection is tucked away here

 

In praise of Crooked Cat Books

A year ago I was following the bandwagon of self-publishing on the Kindle, and you couldn’t let a publisher, indie, traditional or vanity, within shouting distance of me. I was doing all right on my own, ta very much.

Then along came Crooked Cat, and by January this year, I’d changed my mind. There were a number of factors including the feeling that the ebook bubble had burst, or at the very least, found its level. The big hitters, writers who went from unknowns to megasellers would not be seen again.

But the biggest, most persuasive point was Crooked Cat itself. I’d known husband and wife team, Laurence and Steph Patterson for a year or five. Not well, but well enough to know that they were professional. I knew that I would not throwing my lot in with a bunch of hacks who will simply accept anything sent them on the grounds that it will make a few bob no matter how bad it is.

And so it has turned out. It’s 9 months since I submitted The Filey Connection to them. In that time, Crooked Cat have turned out many novels from largely unknown writers, in genres which range from contemporary and historical romance, to chick-lit, to humour, to crime and thrillers both cosy and hard-hitting. And every title has the hallmark of class that is rapidly becoming synonymous with Crooked Cat.

The first two Sanford 3rd Age Cub Mysteries in front of the machine upon which they were created.

From a personal point of view, my Sanford 3rd Age Club Mysteries have seen one other title, The I-Spy Murders launched in both ebook and paperback, and though you can’t see it from the photo above, the paperbacks match the quality of anything you’ll find in your local bookstore. I also published my sci-fi/psycho-horror thriller, Voices with them.

This Friday, the list grows by one more, when A Halloween Homicide, a previously self-published Sanford 3rd Age Club Mystery, passes to Crooked Cat.

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A month or so from now, we should have A Murder for Christmas, another previously self-published Sanford 3rd Age Club Mystery, with them, and by the time we’re nearing the end of the year, the fifth title starring the middle-aged rockers of the Sanford 3rd Age Club, Murder at the Murder Mystery Weekend should be on the virtual bookshelves.

At my age, a year doesn’t seem like a long time, but this year, however short it seems, has been magical mystery tour for me, largely thanks to my involvement with Crooked Cat. I’ve made many new friends from all over the world, taken on new ideas from other writers, and offered my own ideas for them to ponder, and I’ve had plenty of chuckles along the way.

Are you a writer? Check out their submissions page, but be advised, I know they’re busy so you could have quite a wait?

Are you a reader? Check out the Crooked Cat bookstore. Trust me you’ll find something to enjoy.

Another Milestone

September already. Doesn’t time fly when you’re having fun? It seems like only a few days ago when I signed the first contract with Crooked Cat Books for publication of The Filey Connection.

Quite a bit of ale has flowed through the pumps since the start of the year, which is when I actually signed on the dotted line. The Filey Connection, The I-Spy Murders are both out there, and next week sees the transfer of A Halloween Homicide to Crooked Cat. Beyond that, A Murder for Christmas will soon follow, and as I write, Murder at the Murder Mystery Weekend, scheduled for release in December, is almost ready for delivery. The Sanford 3rd Age Club Mysteries are establishing themselves and I hope to see them competing with other, popular, cosy series like Libby Sarjeant and Falconer.

Today, however, sees another landmark, with the publication of The Filey Connection in paperback.

And just to prove it, here’s a picture of my copy, held in my own, dainty hands. I left my head off the picture for two reasons: this isn’t a horror blog and I don’t get my new dentures until October.

Other titles will follow and I can see the day coming when we’ll need to clear a space on the bookshelf for the Sanford 3rd Age Club Mysteries. The picture of my missus chucking her knickers at Tom Jones will have to give way for the adventures of Joe, Sheila and Brenda and the rest of the middle aged rockers.

So for those of you not captivated by the Kindle or enamoured of the Nook, those of you who like the feel of paper in your hands The Filey Connection is out there waiting for you.

You can purchase The Filey Connection in paperback from:

Amazon UK

Amazon Worldwide

WH Smiths

Waterstones

Foyles