David W. Robinson's Blog: Always Writing, page 47

Season’s Greetings

It’s Christmas Eve and time for me to send out my best wishes to you all.

I’m not a big lover of the festive season. Here in Great Britain the days are too short, cold and damp, and as the only driver in the house, I tend to stay sober while Her Indoors and the rest of the family get blathered. Added to which, this time of year always reminds me of the people I’ve lost from my life.

I did have some good news this morning, with two of the STAC Mysteries in the UK Kindle British Detectives top 30. A Murder for Christmas and Murder at the Murder Mystery Weekend have proved quite popular both sides of the Atlantic this year.

Not everyone is a glum as me over Christmas. I’m told that down at the Lazy Luncheonette, while Sheila decks herself a funny hat and strands of tinsel, Brenda carries a sprig of mistletoe in the pockets of her tabard, and woe betide the man who refuses to pucker up. Joe has been seen wearing a paper hat, but knowing him, it’ll be one he made earlier from old copies of the Yorkshire Evening Post.

I’m in cruise control today, just pottering around, and I’m taking the day off tomorrow, but I’ll be back on Wednesday, slaving over a hot keyboard in a desperate effort to keep you entertained.

As I write, Her Indoors is getting ready to take my credit card for a serious run round the shops and I have to be there to prevent a financial meltdown. I’ll see you soon, but for now, let me wish you all a very Merry Christmas.

I Still Miss You Ma

If she were still with us, my mother would be 86 today. She passed away at the age of 71 after a short illness. It wasn’t entirely unexpected. She’d suffered from a heart defect all her life and she needed surgery five years before her death, but wouldn’t go for it.

I was never wild child, but I was always stubborn to the point of pig-headedness, and I did my own thing. Slightly more malleable as I get older, by and large I still do my own sweet thing and not what society expects of me. Small wonder, then, that it took me many years to realise exactly what my mother did for me.

She taught me to read and write before I went to school. I see kids these days leaving school who still can’t do either. She spent years struggling and juggling finances, but my brother and I never went without.

A small, but fierce woman, she was the only person who could exert any influence or control over me, and while she did so, she still backed me up as mothers do. When the picture below was taken, I was about 13 years old and just getting into the swing of full, teenage defiance. Arguments were frequent, I lost most of them, but there was no rancour, no bitterness. The unconditional support was still there.

When I got my girlfriend pregnant in 1968 (a time when it still mattered in working class communities) she tore me to pieces, let me know in no uncertain terms what a mess I’d made of things, but she still stood by me, and when that first marriage fell apart less than ten years later, she was there with a room and some more, forcibly expressed opinions.

I suppose it’s her outspokenness and willingness to confront just about anyone, that gave rise to the character of Sheila in the STAC Mysteries. It’s certainly where I get the same qualities.

I’ve never found a use for hindsight, but looking back on my life, recalling arguments, drunken nights, the days of hard graft, the fighting, the fucking, everything that I am and have been, it’s as if there was always a subliminal awareness of this backup: a support system ready to bolster me when I was wrong, applaud me when I was right.

If I don’t do hindsight, I don’t do regrets either, but there are times when I wish she was still here.

Happy birthday, Ma.

An Interview with STAC (re-run)

It’s nearly Christmas and time to get into party mode, so here’s a bit of fun which first appeared in the 2011 Writelinkers Christmas Magazine and which went unnoticed on this blog earlier in the year.

Maur een Vincent-Northam interviews members of the Sanford 3rd Age Club.

A celebrated investigative journalist, Maureen Vincent-Northam (or MVN as she’s known in the business and by those who can never remember her name) has sought interminably to uncover the truth behind the headlines. She has been described as a cross between Dom Littlewood and Esther Rantzen but with fewer teeth and more hair. She writes regular columns for the police gossip pages of Hello! Hello! Hello! and That’s Life in Wormwood Scrubs! and has interviewed top celebrities from Hollywood (Birmingham) and Barnsley (Pennsylvania).

Having been banned from the newspaper’s office party this year for reasons known only to the editor and Frank Longstaff who writes the popular Tea Cosies and Other Useful Hand Knits column every other Wednesday – and firmly denying any association with those pictures found on the photocopier – I found myself peering through the steamed up windows of a Sanford eatery.

The owner of the Lazy Luncheonette, Joe Murray, opened the door eight inches to allow me entrance. With a cheerful ‘Get in quick, you’re letting all the bloody heat out’, I was led to a table beneath a row of booklets. These, I realised, must be the famous Joe Murray Casebooks in which Sanford’s most celebrated sleuth recorded his past triumphs.

Murray introduced his partners in crime solving, a mop-wielding Sheila Riley, who apologised graciously for the after-hours cleanup operation and Brenda Jump, who wiped down my handbag with a damp J-Cloth.

MVN: Tell us, Joe, was it reading detective fiction or the extortionate price of sliced ham at the wholesalers that fuelled your interest in crime?

JOE: You’ve been misinformed, lady. See, what you have to remember is this is a mining town. Coal was always king here, followed by steel and then my old dad’s veal and ham pie. During the early sixties, about the time of the Cuban missile crisis, there was a serious shortage of coal, and while everyone else blamed Albert Bickerdyke, the pit manager, it was me, at the age of seven, who rumbled Sid Sackson, the coal man, who was hoarding nutty slack. He banked on the price of coal going up soon after the bombs went up. And that’s what turned me into the best detective in Yorkshire.

MVN: Brenda, we know you have a bit of a thing for Joe, why do you suppose he can resist you?

BRENDA: Joe is a lovely man. He’s kind, generous, always there if you need a shoulder to cry on, and as employees, he treats me, Sheila and his nephew Lee with the greatest respect and courtesy. (Whisper) We’re due for a pay rise. (Normal tone) Joe’s done a sterling job of resisting my charms, but mark my words, one of these days, he’ll have half a bitter too much and then I’ll have him at my mercy, stripped right down to his wallet.

MVN: Sheila, as the widow of a police officer, do you see it as your duty to keep filthy degenerate, corrupt, perverted, decadent scum off the streets – or is it simply a nice little hobby?

SHEILA: If I really wanted filthy, degenerate etc., scum off the streets, I’d lock Joe and Brenda in here, wouldn’t I? I was a school secretary for years as well as the wife of a police inspector, so I’m a little more tolerant than your question might suggest. It’s politicians I want taken off the streets.

MVN: Joe, as an aficionado of the 70s, do you not consider it a crime for people to watch re-runs of Follyfoot, and to own a Stylophone?

JOE: Only if they’re under 50. See that’s what annoys me with these kids today. They don’t understand flares and platform shoes. They’re just fashion items to today’s mob. But not to us. They’re icons, symbols of a better age. Follyfoot, the Stylophone, platforms, flares and Abba. They defined an entire generation. Especially Abba.

MVN: Brenda, what personal items aid you most when solving a crime?

BRENDA: low cut blouses, short skirts, high heels and seamed stockings. There’s nothing like a hint of promise to distract a man into confessing.

MVN: Sheila, have you ever mixed up the bookings on a STAC outing and if so what were the consequences?

SHEILA: Only once. I was supposed to book a day trip to Stafford, but the girl on the desk misheard me and booked us for a day out in Trafford. Trafford Park, to be precise, which as everyone knows was the largest industrial estate in Europe at one time. It didn’t go down well. Few people were impressed with the tour of the Kellog’s factory and the prices in the Trafford Centre were outrageous. Even Brenda refused to take her credit card out and Joe almost had a heart attack when they gave him the bill for three cups of coffee. I distinctly remember him asking, “Did you fly Club Class to Columbia for the beans?”

MVN: Joe, your rapier-sharp crime-busting abilities have helped put away many a villain, do you worry there might be a price on your head?

JOE: Trust me, it’s never going to happen. As long as the draymen want their breakfast, I’m safe. No self-respecting hitman would ever tackle those guys when they’re hungry. I keep telling the girls, when you’re serving, get your hands out of the way quick, because if you don’t, you’ll find they’ve sliced off one of your fingers, covered it in ketchup and they’re washing it down with tea. The Mafia have nothing on the Sanford Breweries crew.

MVN: Brenda, tell our readers the secret of packing 58 outfits into one suitcase when you go on a Sanford jaunt?

 

BRENDA: Ergonomics coupled to sheer bloody-mindedness. I say to myself, if Joe Murray can get all that money into one tiny wallet, I can get my entire wardrobe into a single valise. It all has to be properly folded and you cannot leave a millimetre of space between pieces… as I explained to that young bit of beefcake who works on the lottery stand in Sanford Mall.

MVN: Sheila, you’re often seen as STAC’s ‘sensible’ member. Do you ever wish you could let your hair down like Brenda?

SHEILA: as the widow of a police inspector, and former secretary to the headmaster of Sanford’s largest school, I feel it’s important to maintain an air of dignity at all times. But I can let go, you know. I recall an outing to Whitby where I had fish and chips, served in newspaper and ate them with my fingers.

MVN: Joe, is there any chance you will ever enjoy a STAC outing?

JOE: I enjoy them all. Especially those where there’s a murder, which usually means them all. I do know it’s getting more difficult to find hotels and theme parks and so on that will take us. Apparently, once they see our name on the booking form, the insurance companies double their rates for the venue. Can’t see why. I mean, it’s not as if we’re young kids, out to wreck the place is it? And is it our fault that when we show up, the body count rises?

MVN: Brenda, how do you keep STAC members happy when things go belly-up?

BRENDA: some are more difficult to please than others. George Robson, for instance, is easy. I sort of slink up to him and say, “Think of Stingray, George. Anything could happen in the next half hour.” Mavis Barker isn’t difficult. She’s a balloon to start with. Sylvia and Les Tanner can be real pains, and so can Alec and Julia Staines, but I have ways of dealing with them. I just say, “Shut it or the next time you come in The Lazy Luncheonette, you get a knuckle sandwich with your tea.”

MVN: Sheila, you have a mind like an encyclopaedia, do you ever worry that you might make the others look thick?

SHEILA: It’s not something I worry about, mainly because they are thick. Someone has to keep Joe’s feet on the ground when he’s theorising, and someone has to prevent Brenda from compromising every male witness in town…and every male non-witness, come to think. Joe has a sharp mind, but there are times when he’s thick as a plank. Brenda comes up with some timely suggestions, too, but they’re mostly horizontal. I see myself as one who reins in their more dubious flights of fancy.

And a final message for our readers from Joe…

If you want the best steak and kidney pudding in Yorkshire get yourself down to the Lazy Luncheonette, Doncaster Road, Sanford. Open from 6:30 every day except … Well what did you expect me to say? Murderers watch out, the Sanford Third Age Club is about?

***

Joe, Sheila, Brenda, and the rest of the STAC would like to wish all our readers and followers  a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

Cover Reveal and Chart News

The Feast of Steven is bearing down on us like an express train heading for the buffers (barmpot Mayan non-prophecies permitting) and I’m driven to distraction trying to keep up.

Today is another milestone in the continuing exploits of Joe, Sheila, Brenda and Co. At half past five this morning, when I first switched on the computer, I checked the top 100 in UK Kindle/Books/Fiction/Crime Thrillers & Mystery/Mystery/British Detectives, which is where the STAC Mysteries find their home, and I had three titles in there. Not the first time it’s happened, but this time, two of them were in the top fifty.

Murder at the Murder Mystery Weekend sat at #39

A Murder for Christmas was at #44

And in the same chart, The Filey Connection was snuggled in at #91.

The main Christmas message is due over the weekend, but Joe, Sheila, Brenda and the STAC gang would like to thank their readers and followers for this unexpected Christmas treat.

Now to other matters.

Like writers, publishers can be difficult to work with at times. Not so Crooked Cat Books. I’ve always found them approachable and happy to negotiate. For the last week or so emails have bounced back and forth between Laurence Patterson, one half of the husband and wife team who run Crooked Cat, and me concerning the cover of forthcoming release, The Handshaker.

In contrast to the light hearted STAC Mysteries, The Handshaker is a dark, gritty and in places, frightening tale of serial rape and murder. What you don’t want for the cover is a page that could have come from the Beano.

I sent in some ideas… no good. Too complex, and they said little about the tale. Laurence sent me some and I liked them, but there were problems.

Eventually, about four o’clock yesterday afternoon, Laurence got it just right. An image that tells the reader this is not The Beano.

And here it is:

The first, obviously, is the wraparound image for the paperback, the second is the front cover, which will also constitute the e-book cover.

The Handshaker has now been removed from my self-published list, and will be re-issued under the Crooked Cat banner on January 18th. There will be a launch party on Facebook and everyone is welcome.

Reality Behind the Fiction

I was talking to my eldest son a while back about the reality involved in the back story of A Murder for Christmas: particularly, the Middleton Penny and the Middleton Light Railway. Both have a role to play in the novel, both are fact, not fiction.

 

 

I grew up in south Leeds. Born in Holbeck (old trainspotters will remember Holbeck sheds) I was four years old when the family moved to Middleton, a large council estate on the extreme, southern outskirts of Leeds. I would spend the next quarter of a century on that estate.

The Middleton Light Railway carried coal from Broom Colliery down to the canal wharfs near the centre of Leeds, and it has the distinction of being the world’s first commercial railway, first opened in 1758, using horse-drawn vehicles. In 1812, the manager, John Blenkinsop, asked Matthew Murray to build him a steam engine, and the result was the Salamanca. The names of Blenkinsop and Murray were immortalised in two south Leeds schools: John Blenkinsop, which was was situated in Middleton, and Matthew Murray in Holbeck.

Broom pit closed in the mid sixties but the railway, now operated by a trust, still runs today, carrying passengers, not coal.

If most people know of the Middleton Light Railway, then the opposite is true of the Middleton Penny, which has a more prominent role in A Murder for Christmas.

In 1933 only about seven pennies bearing the head of George V were minted. Two of them were installed in the foundations of churches in Leeds; St Mary’s at Hawksworth Wood and St Cross in Middleton. Sometime around 1970, the Middleton Penny disappeared, presumed stolen, never to be seen again. Its value is estimated at anything up to £100,000.

The odd thing is, I lived within 200 yards of that church at the time of its disappearance. My daughter was baptised at St Cross. And yet at the time, I swear I knew nothing about it (honest, guv, I was down the pub with a few mates that night).

What happened to the penny? The truth is, no one really knows. The church was undergoing some renovation work in 1970 and there’s an assumption that it was stolen. Maybe it wasn’t stolen in the true sense of the word. Maybe one of the builders was a penny short of his bus fare and he took it. Maybe it just got thrown in the skip by accident and is now buried in some landfill site.

Reality: it doesn’t half make for good fiction.

A One Day Sale

It’s another dour, dark and damp Monday morning here in the middle of Mancunian nowhere, and with eight days to go to the feast of Steven, you probably have all your prezzies bought, wrapped, labelled and lined up under the tree.

I woke to find that I still have three STAC Mysteries sitting in the Kindle UK British Detective top 100.

The Filey Connection at #83

Murder at the Murder Mystery Weekend was at #70 (and #92 in the Books, British detective chart)

While A Murder for Christmas, which peaked yesterday at number 36, stood at #54 (and #67 in the Book, British Detective chart)

Naturally, this is all very gratifying, but it doesn’t end there. Crooked Cat Books have cut the price of two paperbacks for today.

Over the next 24 hours, you can pick up paperback copies of The Filey Connection and The I-Spy Murders at knockdown prices of £4.54 and £5.17 respectively, and they’re available with FREE DELIVERY.

But it is for today only. By tomorrow the prices will have returned to normal.

So if you’re looking for an extra gift for that special, whodunit loving someone in your life (even if it’s you) get on over to Amazon and put your order in.

Far East Success

I’ve just had some surprising news.

A Murder for Christmas (http://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B009Y6JAA2)  has made the Kindle Mystery chart… in Japan (http://www.amazon.co.jp/A-Murder-For-Christmas-ebook/dp/B009Y6JAA2).

The STAC Mysteries continue to do well in the UK and America, and over the course of the last year and a half, I’ve sold odd titles in Germany, Spain and Italy, but never in numbers, and here we are, all of a sudden, appealing to an audience in the Far East.

On checking the chart, I find my Christmas title in some august company. Holmes, Poirot, Miss Marple, Stieg Larrson and Raymond Chandler, and it justifies my faith in the whodunit: it has a genuine, international appeal. Everyone, everywhere enjoys a bit of escapist mystery.

To my readers in Japan, have a mysteriously great Christmas and a puzzling, happy New Year.

A Murderously Good Month

Well, it’s another grand morning here in the back of beyond. Freezing cold, damp, foggy and my hip is playing up.

I’m not complaining, though. Why? Because I woke up to find yet again, I had two of the STAC Mysteries in the UK Kindle/British Detective top 100, and a third one knocking on the door.

A Murder for Christmas hovered just outside the chart, Murder at the Murder Mystery Weekend, which is set at a New Year function in Lincoln, was in both the Kindle and Books, chart, and to my surprise, The Filey Connection, the very first STAC Mystery, had sneaked in at number 91.

Set in the height of summer, The Filey Connection was the title that got the ball rolling. Maybe readers need a breather from the short dark days. Or maybe it’s the price of just 77p they find attractive.

It goes without saying that I’m highly chuffed with the progress of the STAC Mysteries.

Query: if it goes without saying, why am I saying it?

And even as I write, The Filey Connection has dropped out of the chart, but Murder at the Murder Mystery Weekend has moved up and A Murder for Christmas has re-entered the top 100.

Now this is all very well if you own a Kindle. Suppose you don’t? Suppose you own another type of e-reader or tablet?

Not a problem. All books are available in all formats. The Amazon sites, naturally are for the Kindle. Crooked Cat Books supply MOBI (Kindle), EPUB (Nook, etc.) and PDF (computer) while Smashwords will supply all formats.

Here, now are the links for the STAC Mysteries.

 

The Filey Connection  Crooked Cat Books, Amazon, Smashwords

 

 

 

The I-Spy Murders Crooked Cat Books, Amazon, Smashwords

 

 

 

 

A Halloween Homicide Crooked Cat Books, Amazon, Smashwords

 

 

 

 

A Murder for Christmas Crooked Cat Books, Amazon, Smashwords

 

 

 

 

Murder at the Murder Mystery Weekend Crooked Cat Books, Amazon, Smashwords

 

 

Indulge yourself and have a murderously good day.

Guesting, Publishing, Contracts… A Busy Day Today

Today is 12/12/12. It’s the last time this kind of date will happen for about 90 years. There’s nothing particularly auspicious about it. It’s a facet of the way we write dates, nothing more. And yet, for me, it’s turning out to be quite special.

I woke to find that Murder at the Murder Mystery Weekend is still in the UK Kindle British Detective top 100. It’s low down, for sure, but it’s still in there.

And now I have no less than four announcements to make.

First off, I’m guest posting over on Cathie Dunn’s excellent blog (link below). Cathie, who writes top-notch, historical romance/thrillers such as Dark Deceit, has allowed me space to give you some background to the STAC Mystery series. Today I’m concentrating on A Murder for Christmas, and on Friday, I’ll be talking about the above mentioned Murder at the Murder Mystery Weekend.

Next, for the fourth year running, my dear friends, Maureen Vincent-Northam, Laurie Clayton, and I, have cobbled together the annual Writelinkers Christmas Magazine. I’ve been a member of Writelink, and a moderator for about 8 years now, and the Christmas magazine is composed of work by the members, many of them published authors, some not yet published, but turning out a fine body of work just the same. You can follow the link from the bottom of the post.

Finally, two items about forthcoming releases.

The history of The Handshaker is splattered all over this blog, so I won’t go into it again. Early this year, I decided that Croft and Millie should have their own series, and the first stage of that process was to write a sequel The Handshaker. The second stage was to offer the series to Crooked Cat, who said, ‘yes, come on down’. The third stage is the transfer of publication rights of The Handshaker to Crooked Cat Books, as a platform for future titles. That process completes on January 18th when Crooked Cat Books will re-release The Handshaker under their imprint.

It’s one of the last of my self-published titles, and it will be the last I hand over to Crooked Cat. The rest, a scattering of bits and pieces, will never be developed any further than they are now, and they will remain with me.

I signed the publication contract yesterday, and The Handshaker will be removed from my lists just after Christmas. It will reappear on Crooked Cat’s on January 18th, so make a note in your diary.

It wasn’t the only publication contract I signed with Crooked Cat yesterday. My final item of news brings us full circle, back to the STAC Mysteries.

I’m giving nothing away when I tell you that Joe is feeling amorous in Murder at the Murder Mystery Weekend. By the turn of the year, he’s also feeling lonely and reckons it’s time he had a lady in his life. And what better time to find romance than St Valentine’s Day? And that is the catalyst for the sixth STAC Mystery, My Deadly Valentine.

This title gave me more headaches than my credit card bill, but it finally went off to Crooked Cat a week or so ago, and they liked it so much that the contract landed in my email yesterday.

A little darker than the others in the series, your favourite characters all have a role to play in the search for the Sanford Valentine Strangler, and this time Joe doesn’t have far to look for the main suspect… it’s him.

That’s all you’re getting for now. My Deadly Valentine is scheduled for release on February 6th 2013, so stay tuned for more news.

And that’s it. 12/12/12: a busy day.

***

Links in this post

Cathie Dunn’s Blog

Maureen Vincent-Northam

Laurie Clayton

Writelinkers Christmas Magazine

The Handshaker

A Murder for Christmas

Murder at the Murder Mystery Weekend

Aspiring Adulteresses Start Here

I was rapping with me old mate Trevor Belshaw over the weekend. As well as writing, we usually rattle on about music and footy. I’m a devout Man U disciple, and Trevor follows Notts Forest. I’m not sure how far back Trevor can go, but I remember Forest beating Luton Town in the 1959 FA Cup Final. I think they won a couple of European cups, too.

I digress.

Trevor is the brains behind the gigglishly funny Tracy’s Hot Mail, another of those innovative Crooked Cat titles, and one guaranteed to tickle your funny bone. Tracy brings the concept of the diary novel into the 21st century.

Cosy or hard boiled, I stick to whodunits these days, whereas Trevor tends to experiment a little more. Under the pen name, Trevor Forest, he has a backlist of children’s titles, all of which are top notch in their genre. Trainee witch Molly Miggins, the shirker Stanley Stickle avoiding homework and girls, and the brilliantly researched Peggy Larkin’s War, an adventure with an evacuee during World War Two. With Christmas right round the corner, if you’re looking for extra prezzies for your young uns, these titles are ideal.

During the course of our chatter, he reminded me of another project, The Diary of an Aspiring Adulteress.

It’s a blog serial, and even as I write, I can see your brain slipping into overdrive as you reach for the mouse. “Hey up. Serial shagging. We’re having some of that.”

But it’s not erotica. It’s not really even raunchy. It’s a bit saucy, for sure. How could you have a title like that without a hint of stockings and sussies? In reality, it’s another rib-ticking tale, this time from the point of view of Isla Ferry, a wife and mother rapidly approaching the big four-oh, and in need of something more than Sky Movies and a trip to Asda every week.

It’s currently up around part 6, with (so Trevor tells me) more to come.

If you need the low down on the pitfalls and pratfalls of an aspiring adulteress, give it a look. If to, give it a look anyway. There’s nothing like a good chuckle to brighten up a cold and frosty Monday morning.