Sahira Javaid's Blog, page 4
March 29, 2017
Diamond
I see the indifference
Expression worn in resilience
You wear it so casually
Does it just come naturally?
As you face the demons
Forcing you with reasons
To hide yourself away
You still feeding on that pain?
They say pain makes you stronger
But it’s true only if you resisted under
All that agonizing pressure
‘cuz once it dealt with you, you’re a diamond
And what can cut something that brilliant?
I’ve had times I wanna just drop
Everything and walk away and stop
Listening to: do this !do that! suffer this!
And sacrifice that! but, that’s stupid
Who ever saw a victim invite their murder?
That won’t work, i’ll fight like a soldier
I see the deceit and I just trample
It, And i learn by example
with my irrevocable hope
they’ll be groping at their throats
Wondering if ears or their voice deceived them,
What do they know, ha! that’s the reason they’re deaf
I’ve heard people say promises
They never keep, they’re only hostages
To power,
And to whosoever
Has the ends or the greens
To justify their disloyal means!
Shame on them for being bought out, forget it!
we’re not that cheap we’re out of their budget! OH!
We’re a diamond
Sure you can get an easy fake
But how long til it will break?
How long till that fake
Goes ahead and takes
You for granted
Just for a bank account expanded?
We’re the priceless gems and pearls in an oyster
They’re just a broiler
Whatever they take they just burn away
But we diamonds, we constantly repay
Other’s efforts with love and understanding
Not with abandonment and double dealing
What do you even get,
‘cuz when you’re dead
You’ll be all set
None of your worldly items go with you
Why so pompous, you get a dark grave for value
We’re a diamond
Sure you can get an easy fake
But how long til it will break?
How long till that fake
Goes ahead and takes
You for granted,
Karma will get you back
When instead of defending you chose to attack
Coals went through the process
we bared and lived through the nonsense
Where we’ll be shining bright diamonds
While you’re still stuck as vilified items
The post Diamond appeared first on Sahira Javaid.
February 6, 2017
milk and honey book review
I need someone
Who knows struggle
As well as I do
Someone
Wiling to hold my feet in their lap
On days it is too difficult to stand
The type of person who gives
exactly what I need
before I even know I need it
the type of lover who hears me
even when I do not speak
is the type of understanding
I demand
-the type of lover I need
rupi kaur dragged my soul and then let it break into a shower of stars, shuddering sighs and then didn’t leave me. It became a part of my mind, and placed itself in pockets of my heart.
I haven’t been reading as much poetry as I have wished. I have read the likes of Edgar Allen Poe and Rumi. Rupi’s words resonated with my soul. Everything, simply and yet so colloquially, it was as if I was speaking to a long-lost sister, or a best friend. The raw emotions and understanding, the book exudes and puts into words, is what makes this brilliant.
I felt like my own words were threaded between the lines. It brought back into me the reasons why I am a poet. Not of choice. But of need.
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I want to thank her. It’s strange that we are so quick to think others will judge us. Without even trying to connect, we dismiss ourselves and think: “oh, they don’t want to be my friend, or affiliated with me in any way.” We need to stop thinking that way.
The whole book is a beating heart, with a pulse that has reverberated off the world. I know now, how beautiful and how deserving this book is of it’s messages being spread.
I want you to listen, no I need you to listen and understand. Do not simply read this book. Poets do not write to you. They are expressing to you. They are handing over parts of themselves to you. Imprints, or memories, what ever you may call them. So, with your heart and your senses, absorb and see for yourself the magnitude of milk and honey.
The post milk and honey book review appeared first on Sahira Javaid.
January 30, 2017
Bottle Up all the Love
We seriously need to bottle up all the love and have people drink it, as if it were an elixir rivaling alcohol. We need more acceptance, sense of belonging and hearts who are gentler.
Open up and Share
Last night I came across a wonderful hashtag on twitter. #WriteYourResistance. It promotes sharing stories that are fighting for those who are marginalized and bringing more acceptance into literature. I was hyped the moment I saw it and shared my own story idea, Psyche Twist. The love and support from everyone had my soul resonating with determination and courage. It opened my heart to be myself. In all my enthusiasm and joy, I couldn’t tell when my hype began and my personality took over.
Why I Write
Let me share why I write here. At first it was my only way to book a ticket— haha that pun was unintentional—and escape to my own world. A place where I couldn’t be judged, ridiculed or need to feel any worries or pain. Words were so much easier to write than to say. Writing them out was therapeutic. I could get all my frustrations, share the love, shelter myself from my fears and let the ink wash away my pain. It was about my own comfort.
Now, it includes that and more. I want to be how a star is. Yes, I’m going to use this imagery. A star shines no matter what. You can’t see it in the day, but at night it looks so much brighter. I decided I’d try to be someone who would shine light on others’ beautiful aspects. You may not see the smile that beautifies you, or the kindness that accentuates your humanity, or the way your concerns for others while you suffer made you so much greater than those who hurt you.
The goodness repels evil. I know evil exists and that there is hatred. So, if there’s anything you can take from this. Then, let it be that you are greater than your past and you are greater when you shine with that beautiful and needed kindness.
The post Bottle Up all the Love appeared first on Sahira Javaid.
January 10, 2017
My Battle
In a room, I am cloaked in the darkness. Away from her, away from her screams, her accusations, the poison of her that she spews over me. The way she claws at me, my skin, bruised by her. My own hatred and fears over me like a hood. The door rumbles with knocks. I stumble back, my heart being jolted into action. I cry and have my back pressed against the wall. Holding my head, letting the familiarity of pain numb me again. It’s the only feeling I’ve felt. It’s so natural. The burning at the sides of my eyes, the coldness over my back and the sickening comfort of having darkness all around. No one can see me, and I don’t have to see the true monsters: people and their everchanging whims. It holds me, enveloping me in its temporary solace. As if it were shushing me, lulling me like an infant. Go to sleep, it says, disconnect from the world. Enter your own world. They can’t get you there. They can’t find you there. They can’t hurt you there.
The pounding over the door increases. I can see a glittering piece of metal just in front of me. Everything comes back again. Waking me from my peace. Spinning in my mind, pulsing against my rib cage, sharp and splitting against my skull.
“You’re crazy!”
“You have no right over your emotions. I own them!”
“No one loves you!”
“I hate you!
“You’re the reason for my problems!”
“You are nothing without me!”
“Die already!”
“You should never have been born!”
“I’m not beautiful!”
“I’m scared!”
“What’s going to happen?!”
“I don’t want to live anymore!”
“I’m so cold.”
“She keeps hurting me!”
“She hit me and it hurts.”
“But, I need to try.”
“Crying. Crying all the time.”
“I love…”
“I just want love.”
“I don’t know.”
“I just want LOVE!”
“The pain.. it feels good?”
“I’d rather have no emotions!”
“I’ll use you for my own needs!”
“Your views, your emotions mean nothing to me!”
“DIE!”
“CRY!”
“Live?”
“DIE!”
The door unhinges and so do I. No scream can tear from me as the dark form enters the room, she looks like me. Her hands in fists, gloved with the darkness that the night owns. Her eyes own the red of blood. A hatred so profuse, clouded over. My eyes dart from the blade on the floor, to the door right behind her. I keep darting, and she grabs me. Time seems to slow. I’m gripped by the darkness of my own fears, my doubts, my worries, my hatred, impregnated by the narcissists who I live with. All I wanted was to nurture, to be loved, to love in return. She keeps a grip on me and pulls. I lift my hand in the air.
“They love you.” She says.
“They abuse you after they love you.”
“They hurt you, they care.”
“They yell and scream.”
“You are nothing.”
“You mean nothing to them.”
“You are their puppet.”
“I am alone.”
My fist shakes.
“No one believes in me!”
“Yes… I do!”
My fist is clenching tighter. There’s this speck of light I can see around my chest, I feel a warmth.
“If people won’t believe in me, then I’ll have to believe in myself.”
“He shows concern for me. The boy who is a stranger. He smiles. He holds a warmth I’ve never been shown by anyone.”
“if he cares, then I will too!”
My fist collides with the dark version of me, across her jaw and she falls. I stumble and reach for the metal, and then turn my back on it, running out the door.
It’s bright. Light, sunshine, birds serenading the winds. It’s so unfamiliar. A love? My heart feels? It actually feels…warm? So strange. So scary.
“I’m afraid to love. But, I’ll love anyways, because it feels so warm. It’s warmer than the closed darkness. I’ll love anyways because I find peace when he holds my gaze. His eyes are so peaceful. It’s brighter than the redness over my cheeks, or the blue of bruises over my arms.”
“I feel so…happy?”
“Does he like me? Do I love him?”
“Does he love me? Do I fear him?”
“Do I love him?”
“Do I feel love?”
“What is love?”
He taught me what love is. Love is kind. He showed me love’s meaning. Love is smiling. Love is what he says. Love is the warmth of his smile, the awareness of kindness in his eyes. Love is the softness of his voice. Love needs no skin. His heart is soft enough for me. The way you hold my gaze. Love is his chivalry. Love is…love is pain? Love is need? Love is want? Love is his silence? Love is sacrifice. Love is his stares. What is love? Love is my silence in the pain. Love is my smiles and laughter. Love is the need to love. Love is…. Too much love. Do I deserve it?
I learned love. And then I learned true love. I am a person of faith. I do not trust anyone, until I started to feel again. Feel more inside my heart.
I found Intuition. I feel worry and I really shouldn’t. I worry and I’m right, I didn’t need to.
When I get nervous, usually things go wrong in some way. I experiment on the feelings and I’m right. I believe in my intuition, my gut feelings. Another feeling That had been caged away inside me. I never knew I had it. This sense, this force of nature that started to guide me. They have never let me down. My intuition was born ever since I started to love him.
“When I worry, it usually means I don’t have to.” And, it works. It’s true.
“When I’m nervous, usually things don’t go as planned.” And, it works. It’s true.
“When I feel this energy, my gut, my heart, it tells the truth.”
Then, one day I read, “God loves you.”
“How….how did… How… He loves me.”
And then I knew. All the pain…. all the struggle. Now I know, years later.
I was but a seed. Planted in the ground, among the darkness, only to grow. To crack open from my shell, to struggle my way up from the soil, breaking free. I didn’t break. I broke FREE.
FREE.
This is the real me:
“I’m so much happier.”
“God loves me. I love you.”
“I am beautiful, inside and out.”
“She hurt me, but I won’t hurt anyone.”
“I’m so content.”
“I’ll have struggles, but I’ll over come them.”
“Smile.”
“LIVE!”
“I want to love. I want to live. I have a purpose.”
“I want to live this moment.”
“I love you.”
“I LOVE YOU.”
“I love him.”
I love God.”
“I am important.”
“I will speak my truth.”
“I will be honest.”
“I don’t care what they say. Their words won’t hurt me.”
“My past is not what I am.”
“ I feel so much more confident.”
“I can do it.”
“I am me.”
“My emotions are mine. My heart is mine. My mind is mine.”
“I …
“am….
“Free…
“I am a light that keeps shining. I am not your shadow, nor the moon who shines because of you. I am the stars. Ever bright, and brightest in the dark. I will shine, so perhaps the light will reach you too.”
The post My Battle appeared first on Sahira Javaid.
November 14, 2016
Recipe| A+ Mango Frozen Yogurt
OK, so I know it’s the middle of November and I’m talking about frozen yogurt. Who said you can’t have a creamy frozen treat in winter? Especially when you’re in a house like mine.
Our window is always catching the light from the sun by the afternoon. So imagine the rays pouring in to the room and heating up the place like a desert. So it’s perfect grounds for having a dessert too. Insert Cheeky smile here…
The All Stars
We have the sweet and creamy mango which is rich in vitamin A, C and B6, and minerals magnesium and potassium. Pairing it with our tangy homemade yogurt and some anti inflammatory turmeric. We can’t forget the golden orange pastured eggs. I finally had a chance to buy them and I’m amazed at how different true pastured free range eggs not only look and taste from battery farmed caged hens. They are also rich in Vitamin A, which is why I gave this an A+.
Not A Guilty Treat
With no added sugars, or strange ingredients you can’t pronounce, no wonder you don’t have to feel guilty for eating mouthfuls of this stuff! The mango will help your digestion, keep your skin clear, glowing and beautiful and boost your immunity. The eggs are also bursting with Omega 3’s, vitamins A, D, K and a ton of other minerals. the dash of turmeric will have you beaming with happiness! This is probably one of the best ways to give your body the nourishment it deserves in the form of frozen dessert.
You scream, we scream…or more like we dream of ice cream. Technically frozen yogurt, but you know what I mean. Here’s the recipe:
Print Yum
Recipe| A+ Mango Frozen Yogurt
Prep Time: 5 minutes
Serving Size: 2
Ingredients
1 Cup of frozen mango chunks2 tbsp or more of yogurt ( grass fed, or whole milk)
2 pastured eggs ( yolks for creamier consistency, or whole eggs)
A dash of turmeric
optional: Vanilla extract
pinch of Himalayan salt
Instructions
There aren't definite measurements, so you can eye ball it. Here is a guide:Add your frozen mango into your blender. Blend for one minute, or until chunky
Add your yogurt and blend again and then drop in two egg yolks for a creamy frozen yogurt. You may keep the whole egg with egg whites if you like a more soft serve.
When you blend in your eggs for a few seconds, sprinkle in your turmeric, your vanilla extract, or vanilla bean if you prefer and salt.
Blend a final time, until you reach the creaminess you desire.
tip: Freeze for twenty minutes to half an hour if you want a firmer frozen yogurt.
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Let me know what you rate this creamy goodness!
The post Recipe| A+ Mango Frozen Yogurt appeared first on Sahira Javaid.
November 13, 2016
Inspiring Quotes
I’ve always collected inspiring quotes, especially on Pinterest— those that really pull at my heart strings. They’ve always inspired me to think and feel the smaller things in life, which can be so grand in our lives.
What Are you Grateful for?
And just never really noticed? We should take time in our day to really be thankful for what we have. There’s someone out there who would love to have what you do. That’s something we might not ever consider. The family, the clean water and food, your ability to walk, or see… all those every day things we might just overlook as gifts. As blessings. As things, which we should be so grateful for.
Get the Free E-book!
That’s why I added quotes at the back of my second poetry book, Hot Ice. It just felt right to include them. And ever since, I decided I should share an E-book of Inspiring quotes for you to read, share and think about.
For everyone that subscribes, you’ll get these free treasured quotes I picked just for you all.
So, go ahead, share, get inspired and fill your hearts full of thankfulness.
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November 8, 2016
Himalayan Salt Lamp Benefits
The day I brought it home, I felt like the air in the living room was much cleaner and that I could breathe easier. I used to sneeze a lot, probably due to dust. Oops. But, now, it’s as if the air has become so much more positive—in fact quite the opposite. By that, I mean it’s been filled with negative ions.
Negative Ions: The positives
Himalayan salt lamps are a natural source for negative ions. They are what make the air so much cleaner. In nature, these ions are what fight air pollution. That’s why having an environment filled with these ions helps your breathe easier by stimulating the flow of oxygen. On the other hand, electronics like our cell phones, computers, tablets and televisions give off positive ions. They create something called electronic smog. That cluttered form of ions is what causes damage to our bodies.
How it works:
The negative ions from the Himalayan salt lamp are released when you heat them up. The ions attach to the positive ions and neutralize them, leaving the air fresh and pure. You get that same effect when you’re at the beach by the ocean, or near a waterfall. You can safely take a deep breath in and know it’s doing you good!
The salt attracts water. You might see what looks like a glistening film over them. The heat from the lamp will eventually evaporate and that’s how the negative ions are created.
That beautiful glow is beneficial too. It ionizes the room and balances out any artificial frequencies, electromagnetic wavelengths and it creates waves from the rainbow light spectrum. Sounds cool huh? All these benefits help to soothe, relax and protect your body.
The Benefits are Mind-Blowing!
So, what are the awesome things the lamps can help you with?
Allergies
Blood disorders
Respiratory problems
Skin conditions
Headaches
Insomnia
Anxiety
Improves your air quality
Relaxation
Maintains good health
Go ahead and put these beautiful glowing lamps in the rooms you need them most. Place them in your living room, where there’s electronics and in your bedroom. Reap the abundant health benefits they can provide you.
The post Himalayan Salt Lamp Benefits appeared first on Sahira Javaid.
October 27, 2016
Epic Fantasy
The book was created on pure imagination, a child’s inclination for adventure, miracles and dreams. It aims to break the cliches and stereotypes. The book is not just another Epic fantasy, it is my lifelong project, a journey, an extension of what I aim to bring to the world: Love, hope and redemption.
Yes, the main character in my epic fantasy is Muslim. When i first wrote her, she was a blank slate. Just a girl, no culture, no dreams of her own, she lacked the diversity and richness of what makes someone themselves. That’s why when i revisited my book a few years ago, i gave her an identity. There’s no positive representation in the media for those who are marginalized, so i want her to represent a human who has her own culture and beliefs and also to show that she is first and foremost a person, someone who loves, thinks, and has hopes and dreams of her own. I’ve seen more and more writers speaking up. Our world is full of colour, wonder and possibilities. To let shadows and darkness reign just because it exists– is not the answer.
Before the book is published, I made this poster to get the word out. Please share to support me and let’s build some well needed hype!
Here is the PDF version you can also share: Sahira Javaid Book poster
The post Epic Fantasy appeared first on Sahira Javaid.
October 25, 2016
Myself in the Story of InuYasha
Myself in the Story of InuYasha
“I found myself, not when I was alone, but when someone loved me. And I loved them. Love is a mirror. You see the good in others, but that good is what you hold deep inside. So they see themselves in you. When both of you share that connection, what ties you together is an understanding that can beat any darkness. reflect it and it is truly a love that can be eternal”- Sahira
I found myself in the story of InuYasha. It helped me as a teen. Funny how art/stories can put things into perspective and help you search your own soul. *smiles*
Most people would think of InuYasha and say he was rude, impulsive, a jerk and aggressive. But, to me, I saw the way he kept his true feelings hidden behind his scoffing. He didn’t want to get hurt and was afraid others would think he was weak. He was strong both physically and in heart. Countless times, even as a human he would endure severe wounds and would still fight with the pain. As a child he felt out-of-place, since he was half demon. He didn’t know where he belonged and told himself he’d make his own place. I related with him as a teenager. As I followed the feudal tale of InuYasha, I saw his character grow and become more open. To me InuYasha will forever be an inspiration that is close to my heart.
image by San Watanabe
Image edited by me with text.
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October 22, 2016
Progress and Update 2
The Past Two Weeks: Progress and Update 2
Here is the progress and update. I’ve spent the past two weeks designing the site’s logo and header. Do you like the flaming horse with the welcome that shows up? I used Revolution Slider, a service that helps you create beautiful and immersive sliders. The one I have up on the site uses a feature called Parallax/3D where the images on the slide will sway when you move your mouse over them. Cool, right? You can give it a go yourself to see the slide in action. Go to the home page and the slide will show you its animated images.
Essentuate Life Logo
It’s been frustrating and time consuming finding pictures, colours and shapes for the logo. Canva was a great help in creating the design. I’ve been testing different colours, fonts and shapes to try and make a unique logo I could truly call my own and i finally did it. I have noticed that If you overthink something, it can mess with your creativity. When I had the masterpiece I have been trying to achieve, I wasn’t thinking too much about what logos from other companies and people looked like. I didn’t multitask either, so there are no distractions. That golden rule applies: Never give up.
Reading a lot more!
You can’t be a writer without reading. A writer is someone who’s expression is all about the senses. How the words sound. The way they picture a scene in your head and how in your thoughts as you write them, you can live and learn in a world that is not bound by any limited imagination. I’ve been making sure to sneak in time to read other books. I’ve been immersed and caught red handed, per se— with Leigh Bardugo’s Crooked Kingdom. A special treat for the imagination has been Tehereh Mafi’s whimsical book Furthermore which I’ve been reading together with one of my siblings.
Psyche Twist Update
Psyche Twist has been benefiting from the polishing it has been receiving. I’m currently on the second chapter for the second book. If you want to see what you can expect and inspired me for the characters, you can check out my Pinterest board.
I have a feeling Opportunity is Calling!
Querying can be equally exciting as it is daunting. Even if it takes 1 month or 11 months, you should not give up hope. I’ll be determined, resilient, optimistic and most of all, have faith in my work.
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