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RIVERDALE RECAP: “Chapter Two: A Touch of Evil”

Editor’s Note: This recap will contain spoilers for Riverdale’s second episode, “A Touch of Evil.” Only read on if you’ve watched (or want to be spoiled on) Riverdale‘s latest episode.

Lest we forget where Riverdale‘s head is at, the second episode opens on a bloated corpse being prepared for an autopsy, followed by a quick cut to Archie’s (K.J. Apa) nearly naked body, drenched in sweat. Riverdale is working hard to lock in the title of “Darkest and Horniest Show on Television.”

This episode did a lot to peel back the layers of mysteries that comprise the show’s plot, but it also focused on one of the most strange and troubling aspects: Archie’s relationship with his teacher. Admit it, when you think about the fact a 15 year-old slept with his high school music teacher, it makes you really uncomfortable, right? I mean, it should make you uncomfortable and the fact that the show does not appear to be positioning it as an outright horror is concerning. It’s statutory rape, there’s no way around it.

If you can look past that—and that may be a big “if” for some viewers—the most compelling part of the show has to be Betty (Lili Reinhart) and Veronica (Camila Mendes). Whatever budding friendship these two had is on the rocks after Veronica kissed the love of Betty’s life (that sexpot Archie), but it’s clear that division won’t last. Veronica apologizes, buys Betty flowers—yellow for friendship!—and has cupcakes shipped in from New York.

But Betty is hesitant, and even goes out of her way to hurt Veronica by trying to strike up a new friendship with Cheryl Blossom. Cheryl is a legit psycho though and a total creep, so that doesn’t last long. Betty’s mom coming in with burning incense to banish the “evil presence” left by Cheryl is hilarious. Too bad Betty’s mom is also a legit psycho. Long story short, while it takes most of the episode, Betty and Veronica are friends again by the time the credits roll.

Do Betty and Veronica remind anybody else of Brenda and Kelly from the original 90210? Obviously, the 90210 gang were somewhat inspired by the Archie comic characters, but updated with modern sexuality and venom. It’s a weird pop cultural ouroboros thing, I think. Maybe I’m way off base one this one. Or maybe not.

This second episode does, however, make it clear that Riverdale is following the classic Aaron Spelling model of things going crazy, bad stuff happening, and then everything returning to normal, complete with sexy people smiling. I know we compared it to Twin Peaks in our review, but the format of this show reminds me so much of Melrose Place and 90210. It calls itself a dark drama, but Riverdale is clearly a soap.

We also finally get to spend some time with Jughead Jones (Cole Sprouse) in this episode. Aside from the crown or beanie (I guess,) this Jughead has zero in common with his comic book counterpart. He’s a serious dude, right? No burgers and fries for this kid; it’s all journalism and angst and bitterness. Will he ever lighten up? Or will he stay the dark narrator of Riverdale?

While the second episode spends most of its time mending fences and bringing our central characters together—that scene of Jughead, Archie, Betty, and Veronica all eating at Pop’s was magical—it also spent some time advancing the mystery of Jason Blossom’s murder. As we all guessed, it’s a lot more complicated than it initially seemed.

We’re told that Cheryl and Jason headed out on a boat down the river, but pulled aside and Jason ran away. Turns out he’d been planning an epic escape from Riverdale with Cheryl as his accomplice. But who was he trying to escape from? It’s unclear, but whoever it was caught up with him, because the autopsy reveals that Jason died a full week later than when Cheryl last saw him. He had been tied up for days, eventually shot in the head, and then dumped back into the river.

This reveal complicates things. Not only was Jason’s death more sinister than we originally thought, but it seems to be pointing to the notion that there is an even bigger secret that someone was willing to kill to protect. Jason obviously knew something about someone, right? Something that meant he had to run for his life.

What did you think of Riverdale so far? Let us know in the comments below!

Images: The CW

What other TV shows should you be watching in 2017?

The Powerless Cast Breaks Down What to Expect From NBC’s Superhero Comedy

We’re living in the golden age of superhero movies and TV shows. There is no denying that fact (and what a time to be alive!). NBC tried to get into the comic book game a few seasons ago with short-lived Constantine –we’re still not over that cancelation, by the way –and the network is trying again this season with DC Comics comedy Powerless. This time, NBC got it right.

The hilarious and original workplace comedy stars Vanessa Hudgens as Emily, who recently moved to Charm City to work at Wayne Security to help invent gadgets that will help normal people survive in a world where superheroes and villains constantly interrupt daily life. The series finds its stories in the crazy inventions that Emily and her coworkers come up with, their crazy yet lovable goof boss Van Wayne (Alan Tudyk), cousin to, yes, that Bruce Wayne over in Gotham, and generally being a normal person living in a world of superheroes and supervillains.

But don’t expect Powerless to suddenly start crossing over with any of The CW’s DC Comics shows, or any of the big DC movies.

“Our show is its own freestanding thing,” Hudgens told Nerdist on set. “It means we don’t have to try and be anything else. We don’t have to rely on all the other characters that people are really familiar with on television right now. It’s a brand new take on this kind of genre. It always follows around the superheroes and you never get to follow around the normal people who are just trying to do their jobs. It’s a different tone and completely different subject. It’s not which supervillain do they have to kill this week, it’s what paperwork do we have to finish and who is trying to mess everything up?”

Charm City, created for Powerless, is home to some of the lesser known DC Comics characters.

“We have Crimson Fox and Jack O’Lantern who are kind of our main superhero and villain in Charm City,” Hudgens said. “Jack O’Lantern is always terrorizing the town of Charm City. But we’ve got a few fun, random ones. I think the thing that is really funny about our show is that in Charm City, it’s kind of like the B-List superheroes and supervillains. You’ll never see Batman arrive. But there’s a few interesting comic characters.”

Tudyk’s character originally had no connection to Bruce Wayne, but now the showrunners decided that he’s a cousin to the iconic figure, that lets the show play around with more jokes and references that comic fanboys will love.

“Now that he’s a Wayne, it brings in all of that; it brings in the family and he’s immediately linked to Batman, he wants to go to Gotham,” Tudyk said. “He looks up to Bruce.”

Besides references, Powerless won’t be hosting cameos to any of the “big seven” DC Comics superheroes.

“A lot of it is making sure we protect the integrity of the whole DC universe,” Danny Pudi, who plays top engineer Teddy, said. “We don’t want to promise or over-deliver characters. We’re not Metropolis, so we’re not going to be referencing Bruce Wayne the whole time. There’s a lot of Justice League Europe references so far.”

The cast all loves seeing what kind of wacky inventions they get to play with in each episode. “My favorite one so far is the rumbrella, because I was just using it to save my grandma,” Ron Funches, who plays cheerful employee Ron, said. “I think that’s real cute. I think that’s one of the finest parts of the show, just using weird gadgets and different special effects. This is a fun job but sometimes there’s fire.”

“Our products work, but they’re not necessarily the most practical things in the world,” Hudgens said with a laugh. “You use them but it’s just that carrying them around would be taxing.”

Besides the “rumbrella,” an umbrella that protects you from falling debris, viewers will see a “wearbag,” a giant suit you wear over your clothes to protect you from any collateral damage. Both inventions are big, heavy and generally cause you more stress than if you didn’t use them.

“There always seems to be a major drawback to the inventions,” Christina Kirk, who plays cynical employee Jackie, said.

While the inventions are a fun aspect to the show, it’s really the relationships between all the characters and their daily struggles that come with living in a world of superheroes that makes Powerless so unique.

“Emily is very positive and very optimistic. I don’t think anything can change that because that is truly who she is,” Hudgens said. “She really believes that she can change the world and she wants to. She wants to motivate people into doing the same. But being around superheroes and supervillains, getting used to the damage that they cause, getting used to having the worst boss ever it definitely is taxing on Emily but she stays chipper.”

She continued, “Our personal life tends to go down in the office. That’s where we talk about it. Like my character ends up dating a henchman which is just a casual thing that happens in Charm City. There have been a couple of gags that have been quite interesting, I’ll say. Odd body parts. And that’s all I will say.”

Most of the comedy is scripted, but with a cast of comedians, improv while filming is expected and welcomed.

“Yeah, everybody does their own little bits [of improv] here and there,” Hudgens said. “I feel like Alan does the most. He comes onto set and starts rambling off different lines that he’s created and they’re always great. Everyone really does, though.”

“They’ve been great about letting me do that,” Tudyk said. “The scripts are very funny so there isn’t a lot of changing what’s there. They deliver really good scripts. But you can always come up with two or three of those [punchlines]. I sing two songs in an episode, one of them was one they wrote me and the other one, I didn’t learn. I never have done that as an actor and I don’t know what came over me, but I came in with three or four songs I wrote. I’m not a good guitar player so it naturally lends itself to comedy.”

What are you most excited to see from Powerless? Tweet me @SydneyBucksbaum!

Images: NBC

Powerless airs Thursdays at 8:30 p.m. on NBC.

Marvel and Hulu Reveal RUNAWAYS Cast

Marvel Studios continues to dive deep into their wellspring of characters for television adaptations, as Runaways is finally coming to Hulu. First announced in August, Runaways is one step closer to becoming a reality as Marvel.com has officially announced the cast of the upcoming series, which is based on Brian K. Vaughn and Adrian Alphona’s beloved cult classic comic about a group of kids who discover their parents are really supervillains who are part of a group known as “the Pride.”

Upon this discovery, they learn that many among them have also inherited their parents’ super powers too. Deciding to forge their own, non-villainous path in life, the kids begin to form something of a family unit while on the run from their nefarious parents. You can check out the main cast of Runaways, along with their respective characters, below:

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Rhenzy Feliz (Teen Wolf) will play Alex Wilder, a child prodigy with no actual powers, but with a brilliant mind, whose parents were members of the mob.

Lyrica Okano (The Affair) is Nico Minoru is the team’s resident witch, who can cast spells with her powerful staff. She’s also the team’s resident goth girl.

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Virginia Gardner plays Karolina Dean, who discovers that not only is she an alien, but her parents were actually evil alien invaders.

Ariela Barer (New Girl) is Gert Yorkes is a modern day riot grrl who happens to have a telepathic link to a dinosaur.

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Gregg Sulkin plays Chase Stein, whose parents are mad scientists. He steals one of his dad’s inventions and makes a new family with the Runaways

Allegra Acosta is Molly Hernandez (known as Molly Hayes in the comics), who in the original book is a mutant with super strength. Given the Fox/X-Men deal, expect her to be one of the Inhumans instead, or some other kind of experiment. HYDRA maybe?

Y: The Last Man and Saga creator Brian K. Vaughn is serving as executive consultant to the series, and said in a statement, “I’m so excited for fans of the comic to watch this perfect cast of amazing actors, all of whom embody the spirit of their characters more than I ever could have imagined.” The show is being made together with Marvel TV’s Jeph Loeb, along with Josh Schwartz (The OC), and Stephanie Savage (Gossip Girl).

Marvel has had a lot of success with their series on Netflix, starting with Daredevil, and continuing on to Jessica Jones, Luke Cage, and the upcoming Iron Fist and Defenders series. Cloak and Dagger is heading to Freeform, but Runaways will be the first Marvel Studios show made for Hulu. No release date has yet been given for the series, nor has there been a confirmation that this show takes place within the greater Marvel Cinematic Universe. But if I were a betting man, I’d say it will be; after all, in a world of supervillains, there need to be superheroes to fight.

What do you think of the cast of Runaways so far? Are they how you envisioned the characters? Let us know down below in the comments.

Learn all about the Runaways comic book origins!

Images: Marvel Studios / Marvel Comics 

Ghibli Bits: FROM UP ON POPPY HILL

It’s been particularly interesting going through the Studio Ghibi films directed by people other than co-founders Hayao Miyazaki and Isao Takahata for two reasons: it’s a good way to focus on movies that don’t get enough attention, and it allows us to see which of these “apprentice directors,” for lack of a better word, have the potential to become a master in their own right.

By 2010, there had only been four Ghibli features directed by other people, and while I feel like The Secret World of Arrietty was the best of these, it was only truly great because it felt like a Hayao Miyazaki movie. The 2011 feature, From Up on Poppy Hill, definitely feels more like a Takahata movie, even though it was co-scripted by Hayao Miyazaki, and directed by Gorō Miyazaki.

After the tumultuous relationship between father and son during Gorō’s first directorial effort (Tales from Earthsea), it seems the elder Miyazaki wanted to give his son another, fairer chance for success. Gorō, who never really aspired to be a filmmaker, doesn’t have his father’s eye for wonderment, but he does solid work. While Earthsea had great visuals, it suffered a bit in the story department — Poppy Hill is much more nostalgic and contemplative, which seems to suit the strengths of its director. Set in the early ’60s in Yokohama, it’s a film about searching for answers and taking a stand for what you believe in.

It’s perhaps unfair to say it feels more like a Takahata movie than anything else, but the evidence is there. Most of Takahata’s work, and certainly all of it for Ghibli, deals with family and life in Japan through the eyes of young people during formative years. There are similarities to Grave of the Fireflies visually, and most of the story deals with what happened back during both WWII and the Korean Conflict. However, there’s always an air of sadness in Takahata’s movies, or at least contemplation (I mean, Fireflies is one of the saddest movies I’ve ever seen), and that’s been replaced here by pleasantness and melodrama. Nothing wrong with that, but it lacks in emotional depth.

Umi is a 16-year-old girl living in Yokohama in 1963. Her mother is a medical professor teaching in the United States and her father died on a ship during the Korean Conflict. As such, she basically runs the house and takes care of her two younger siblings and her grandmother. Every morning, she raises a series of signal flags which profess “I pray for safe voyages.” Later, a poem is published in the school newspaper about seeing the flags from sea, and its author — a boy named Shun, a member of the journalism club — meets Umi, but makes a pretty bad first impression. She eventually meets him again when her sister wants the poet’s autograph in Quartier Latin, a dilapidated building that houses the high school’s clubs, and is much more impressed. She ends up helping with the newspaper along with Shiro, the head of the student government, and eventually Shun proposes they work to renovate and fix up the building, which is in danger of being demolished.

As you might expect, the more Umi and Shun hang out, the more they start liking each other; it’s the same old story. One night, Umi shows Shun a photograph of three men, taken during WWII. One of the men is her father. Shun goes home where he looks at his copy of the same photo. He asks his father why he’d have a picture of Umi’s father and he’s told that Umi’s father brought Shun to them shortly after WWII and asked them to adopt the boy — they’d lost their own infant son recently. Shun goes to the registrar’s office and finds that he is listed under Umi’s family name. After being distant, Shun eventually tells Umi the fact that they might be brother and sister. Uhh…gross?

After the renovation of the clubhouse is done, and the students are filled with pride, they learn that the building is still set to be demolished by a land developer. Shun, Umi, and Shiro travel to Tokyo plead with the developer not to tear down the building. As the man is an alum of the high school, he agrees to come take a look before making a decision. As the whole school gets ready to persuade the developer to keep their clubhouse, Shun and Umi do some digging about whether Shun actually is related to her, which is made even more awkward when they profess their love for each other, even if they end up being siblings.

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Obviously there’s more to the story that I’m not going to describe, but I think you get the picture. The movie is melodramatic. It feels more CW-y than most anything else Ghibli has done. Even though Whisper of the Heart deals with a blossoming young romance, it feels a lot more grounded in reality. And, you know, come to think of it, that movie had the two leads not like each other at first, and also had the girl not like the boy, not realizing he’s actually the anonymous guy she’d been crushing on based on his school-related work. WOW, Hayao Miyazaki really ripped himself off in the writing department. Anyway, the story works well enough and the characters are likable without standing out too much.

What does really work for the movie are the visuals, naturally. Even more than the fantasy realms of Earthsea, the detail of all the seaside homes and the ships and the sunset looks truly gorgeous. The lengthy shots of Shun and Umi riding a bike around town is abundantly pleasant, almost eliciting a contented sigh from me. When they go to Tokyo, they see all of the structures being built for the 1964 Summer Olympics, and any one of those shots could be a painting hanging in a gallery. And, in a lot of ways, the movie is like a painting, remembering the past fondly, vividly depicted, but without much engagement otherwise.

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Ultimately, From Up on Poppy Hill is nice but easily forgettable. It got mostly positive reviews (83% on Rotten Tomatoes) and did quite well. That’s basically it; Gorō Miyazaki redeemed himself from his earlier critical disappointment, and he went on to direct the new CG-animated, cel-shaded Ghibli television series Ronia the Robber’s Daughter, even though if you watch the wonderful documentary In the Kingdom of Dreams and Madness, chronicling the making of Hayao Miyazaki’s The Wind Rises, Goro seems completely uninterested in making another anything in animation. He’s an odd man.

Next week, we’ll finish Ghibli Bits by talking about the, to-date, final in-house feature film made by Studio Ghibli, the Oscar-nominated When Marnie Was There, as well as talk about the future of its director. Until then!

Images: Studio Ghibli/GKIDS

Kyle Anderson is the Associate Editor for Nerdist. He’s the writer of Studio Ghibli retrospectives Miyazaki Masterclass, Takahata Textbook, and Ghibli Bits. Follow him on Twitter!

Could We Still See a Wolverine/Deadpool Team-Up Movie?

In Marvel’s comic book universe, there have been plenty of Deadpool vs. Wolvierne battles, in addition to the times where they’ve joined forces and even managed to co-exist. On the big screen, it may not be as easy to get Marvel’s Merc with a Mouth to spend any time with the man called Wolverine, simply because Hugh Jackman is set to walk away from the role after Logan comes out next month. But there is a glimmer of hope, and today’s Nerdist News is fanning that hope into a flame!

Join host and Weapon XVII, Jessica Chobot, as she lays out the possibilities for Deadpool and Wolverine to be reunited in a movie for the first time since the first ten minutes of X-Men Origins: Wolverine. And yeah, we’re not counting the “Deadpool” from the end of that film. Deadpool 2 screenwriters Rhett Reese and Paul Wernick told The Playlist that despite rumors to the contrary, Jackman won’t be making a cameo in that film. However, Reese also added that he thinks “the tone will absolutely work if we put those two together. Deadpool always needs a straight man, a foil, and Wolverine would be as good a foil as Colossus, just more cantankerous.”

Of course, the easiest way to pull off this monumental occasion would be if 20th Century Fox simply bit the bullet and recast Wolverine. It’s gotta happen sometime, and bringing out the new Wolverine alongside the already popular Deadpool could be a winning combination. But who are we even kidding? That’s not what anyone wants! We have to see Jackman’s Wolverine and Ryan Reynolds‘ Deadpool together again. And while we don’t doubt Jackman’s intention to move on to other projects, we suspect that if he could ever be enticed to return, it would be by his new-found instagram bro, Reynolds.

What do you think about the potential for a Wolverine and Deadpool movie? Pop your claws and let’s discuss in the comment section below!

Gentle Giant’s New Rocket Racoon & Groot Statue is Adorably Animated

If anyone has any idea how to properly fund a collectibles addiction while being able to pay for things like rent and food, we are all ears. Gentle Giant, purveyors of all things statuesque and delightfully collectible, recently announced the latest addition to their Animated Marvel statue line-up and man oh man, is it I AM GROOT! Wait a second. What we mean to say is that its a fantastic statue that’s absolutely I AM GROOT! Crap, we’ve spent too much I AM GROOT staring at this statue and it seems to have I AM GROOT the way we’re I AM GROOT.

Alright, we seem to have shaken the tree speech patterns for now so let’s just fawn over Gentle Giant’s animated line. Groot and Rocket are currently available for pre-order and are surprisingly affordable when compared to most high-end collectibles. The duo will set you back $64.99 and will pair nicely pair nicely with Gentle Giant’s Star-Lord figure (also $64.99) or any of their “animated” Marvel line.

Gentle Giant hasn’t released the size of Groot and Rocket or Star-Lord as of yet, but judging by their previous animated Marvel line-up, we can safely assume these lil’ Guardians of the Galaxy range somewhere in the neighborhood of Vision’s dimensions — around five and a half inches tall. Each figure is hand-cast, hand-painted, and hand-numbered with a limited edition certificate of authenticity and is likely to sell out quickly. Should you miss the pre-order on this particular Groot and Rocket, there’s always Gentle Giant’s realistic (and substantially more expensive) statue of the pair for $449.

Take a look in the gallery below for more pictures of the super-duo and let us know which animated Marvel GG figure is your favorite in the comments below!

Images: Gentle Giant

Schlock & Awe: THE DRILLER KILLER

Friends and regular readers of Schlock & Awe, this week we’re heading back down that fertile cinematic path that leads to the Video Nasties: 72 movies deemed obscene and unfit for rental in Britain in the ’80s. The idea of prosecuting a movie for its content seems absurd to me and it’s my goal to watch these movies and find out if they do indeed warrant such stigma. I’ve already covered such trashy gems as The Witch Who Came from the Sea, Eaten Alive, The Burning, and Anthropophagus.

This week, friends, we’re talking about 1979’s immortal The Driller Killer.

Of the 72 movies labeled “video nasties,” 39 of them were successfully prosecuted under Britain’s obscenity laws and were banned outright, some later released with cuts and some released uncut many years later. The Driller Killer was banned in 1984, released with 54 seconds cut out in 1999, and eventually released uncut in 2002. But, again, that was just in Britain; in the U.S. nobody gave a shit and it was released uncut always. And, to be fair, the movie has a lot of violence and blood, but I think it’s not quite as gory as the kind of movies that usually resulted in banning. If anything, the movie’s uncomfortable, sleazy, trashy look and tone are what contributed most to its controversy. It’s definitely not a pleasant movie to watch.

Directed by Abel Ferrara, who’d go on to more reputable rough indies like Bad Lieutenant and King of New York, The Driller Killer is a very gritty portrait of insanity and the bohemian lifestyle in the late-70s New York art scene. There’s a punk quality to the movie, both in attitude and the fact that nobody in it knows how to act. At all. It didn’t stop them from making a movie, though.

Ferrara himself, using the pseudonym Jimmy Laine, stars in the film as Reno Miller, an artist in New York who’s struggling to finish his latest painting, and steadily losing money in the process. He lives with his girlfriend Carol (Carolyn Marz) and a super weird punk girl named Pamela (Baybi Day), who’s Carol’s lover. Every little thing gets on Miller’s nerves, not least of which being the phone bill, and the three-months-late rent.

To make their living situation more irritating, the vacant apartment below gets rented out by a No Wave band that likes to rehearse loudly at all hours of the night. Reno complains, but it seems he’s the only one who’s bothered by raucous noise rock. Reno begins having strange hallucinations about Carol with her eyes gouged out, and other pictures of death and decay. He’s transfixed by a commercial for a portable battery back for hardware, specifically large drills (we see him using a drill at the beginning of the movie). He begins using the device and his trusty drill to kill vagrants in and around his building, seemingly without any repercussions.

Reno really breaks down when the art dealer who had commissioned his latest piece sees it and utterly hates it, calling Reno a loser and a has-been. Carol has a huge reaction, but Reno just sits stunned. This, naturally, translates to a murder spree where Reno drill kills a ton of vagrants, and eventually he invites the art dealer back over, for a case of drill killing. Carol, it seems, also is attempting to patch things up with her ex-husband Stephen, which very likely won’t sit well with Reno, will it? Who’s safe with a driller killer out drilling and killing?

The Driller Killer is an intensely weird movie. I’d seen it when I was in college, but it moved a little slow for my liking (and not enough rampant gore, to be honest). Now, I’m baffled by how shoddy it appears, and how meandering and needless a lot of the plot is. Ferrara’s character is loud and rambling in his anger and disdain, and comes across like a nutcase who’s complaining about “the man” keeping him down. The thread about the band also comes from nowhere and goes nowhere — it only contributes to Reno’s slowly unraveling world…at least, all these things are true until you recognize one very important factor:

The movie opens with the above caption, “This Film Should Be Played LOUD.” I was fascinated by it, and for the first few minutes I was confused about why it needed to be played loud. Was this just a pretentious first-time director trying to make a cool, edgy statement with his trashy horror movie?

It wasn’t until the appearance of the No Wave band that it hit me: this movie is a No Wave movie. No Wave music was an avant-garde movement borne out the punk scene in New York in the late ’70s. The music was a bunch of people who had just as little talent as the early punks but also no regard for musical form. Say what you will about the Ramones, but they put together songs — No Wave bands had minimum song structure and were a cacophony of distorted guitars, growling basses, and arrhythmic drum beats.

So, the movie is just a horror film version of No Wave music. The plot meanders with little pace, there are interruptions of nightmare sequences that look like they were edited with a band saw, there are loud musical performances that go on forever, and the sequences of violence are almost never set up with tension or scare tropes. More often than not, Reno just comically pops into the frame and starts drilling. It made me laugh a few times, and I’m not sure that wasn’t the point. It made me appreciate The Driller Killer a lot more, though I would never say I liked it.

Does The Driller Killer deserve its title of “Video Nasty?” Well, it was a video and it was pretty nasty, but the murdering in it, despite the amount of gore, is certainly not as objectionable as some. It’s as if Herschell Gordon Lewis made a noise rock version of Rent. So, like, if that’s your thing, there you go.

Images: Cult Epics

Kyle Anderson is the Associate Editor for Nerdist. He writes the weekly look at weird or obscure films in Schlock & Awe. Follow him on Twitter!

THE LURE Is a Wickedly Weird Mermaid Musical Head Trip (Review)

Personally, I had never thought of the early 1980s’ Eastern European discothèque underworld as the perfect setting for revisiting Hans Christian Anderson’s mermaid mythology. But after seeing The Lure, the harmony of this union seems all too obvious. It didn’t take long for Polish director Agnieszka Smoczynska’s feature debut to prove just how dutiful a benefactor the pulpy, purple-tinted rave scene would serve for her reinvention of the classic mermaid story. Immediately upon dropping two young seafaring sisters, Silver (Marta Mazurek) and Golden (Michalina Olszanska), into the clutches of a lecherous nightclub owner (Zygmunt Malanowicz) and his headlining band (Kinga Preis, Andrzej Konopka, and Jakub Gierszal), The Lure asserts an ether so thick that even just thinking back on the film lodges the timbers of “I Feel Love” right square in my auditory cortex.

Though simple enough in story—the aforementioned mermaid sisters test the waters of life on land, Silver motivated by her newfound love for a human musician, and Golden hungry for human flesh—The Lure is thick and bodacious in mood. Every slow skulk down the fluid-stained corridors of its nightclub setting drags us further into its unsettling but intoxicating little world. Around any given corner is an original musical number, a trippy vignette that plays with the parameters of life and death, or another insight into the psychology and physiology of the independent ‘80s mermaid.

How Smoczynska plays with familiar mer-lore is a good heft of the fun found in The Lure. Silver plays the innocent Ariel proxy, yearning for a human life at the expense of her fins and voice, whereas Golden’s disregard for the human realm feels less reminiscent of Walt Disney than it does of the much grimmer 19th century fairy tale. Disparities in their outlooks and motivations aside, the girls’ deep friendship supplies the heart of the movie. Whether they’re communicating by way of bone-chilling echolocation or sharing a poppy duet about their new lives in the mall-laden Polish ‘burbs, Silver and Golden make for a surprisingly heartrending pair, thanks in large part to the lively chemistry between doe-eyed Mazurek and winningly sour Olszanska.

The empathy in the girls’ camaraderie and the majesty of the film’s hazy ambiance and grim design—the overlong and grotesque tails appended to Silver and Golden are the stuff of your favorite nightmares—keep The Lure from sinking altogether through some of its slower middle segments. During these periods, the closest thing The Lure has to a central story (Silver’s yearning for a human love life) seems all but forgotten. Perhaps too committed to its wily and weird nature, The Lure fills its second act with disconnected vignettes that serve primarily to vex and freak out viewers, and not in the same purposeful way that the rest of the movie seems to.

Even the more narratively inclined elements of the oddball movie seem filtered through a sinister fugue state, though stay afloat thanks to a much clearer forward directive. In these chapters, Smoczynska delivers some inspiringly original and effective work. With a brilliant costarring dynamic, some delightfully catchy musical numbers, and a world so deeply steeped in the most magnetic, macabre aura, The Lure becomes something wholly worth watching, listening to, and living in.

Rating: 4 out of 5

Images: Kino Świat

Michael Arbeiter is the East Coast Editor of Nerdist. Find Michael on Twitter at @MichaelArbeiter.

THE EXPANSE Season 2 Premiere Recap: Burn the Bastards Down

(Fair Warning: This recap contains Expanse spoilers that turn blue in your mouth.)

The Expanse came roaring back to life tonight with a twofer that refused to stall the momentum of the season one finale. “Safe” and “Doors & Corners” proved that, now with chess pieces on the board, the sci-fi show is leaner and looking more fit for the fight.

At the close of the first season, Earth and Mars and the Belt were staring each other down with weapons cocked after the Canterbury was blindsidedly blown to bits; Miller (Thomas Jane) and Space Jon Snow Holden (Steven Strait) barely escaped the irradiated/infected Eros station; and the missing Julie Mao’s (Florence Faivre) dear old dad, Jules-Pierre (François Chau), turned out to be bankrolling the genocide in the name of science. These cats have a refresher if you need it.

With the launch of season two, the plot torpedo continues its trajectory just as soon as Miller and Holden recover from a mild case of cancer. Holden and Naomi (Dominique Tipper) have a much-needed heart to heart about the burden of being the knowledgeable center of a misinformation campaign, which leads to them getting busy in an air lock to vent their pent-up lust.

After opening the Anubis safe, they face an impossible decision: toss the Protomolecule sample into the sun or get it to someone who can use it to make a vaccine? They punt, choosing to hide the goo in an abandoned asteroid mine like Chekhov’s Infection. After all, they’re wrestling with the lab notes that prove Eros was intentionally targeted because no one would care about the poorest Belters getting super flu.

Miller has it out with Amos (Wes Chatham) over killing Sematimba (Kevin Hanchard) in a trigger-happy moment of survival. Once again, the faux-hawked Jiminy Cricket of the crew, Naomi, has to smooth things over, and everyone remembers they’re on the same team during a rousing story about cheese thieves and dairy farts. It’s those little moments of levity that keep a Dystopia like this afloat–even in the darkest times, people still find ways to laugh and connect.

A cohesive unit once again, the team rendezvoused with the Col. Fred Johnson (Chad L. Coleman) and the Outer Planets Alliance to plan a takeover of a near-abandoned satellite station where more answers might be lurking.

Meanwhile, UN Deputy Undersecretary Avasarala (Shohreh Aghdashloo) survives an assassination attempt, brushes her shoulders off, and jumps into a meeting that could determine the fate of all mankind. No biggie. There are factions around the table to manage: some hungry for war, some hoping for cooler heads. Martian ships are amassing, and one is heading toward Phoebe research station–a place of no importance in particular, which gets blown up because of pre-war assumptions and zero communication. Saber rattling is mistaken for genuine geopolitical interest, offering us a precursor of how simple it is for stupid people to go to war with one another.

She’s the de facto deciding voice for deploying the Earth fleet to ramp up the war and protect waystations against a presumed Martian invasion, before pumping the brakes, and then advocating for a proportional reprisal for Phoebe’s destruction. She’s gloriously nuanced in her decision making, and wondrously fierce when she tells a room full of dudes wringing their hands about info delays, “I know how the fucking thing works, just answer my question.”

After the Fleet Commander steps down, citing ethical issues with the rush to escalation, Avasarala gets his take on Fred Johnson’s heroism and betrayal (learning that Johnson didn’t know the Belters he’d killed had already surrendered), and then decides to use her new spy to send a message to the OPA lead. Which, if you’re keeping score, is a little light treason.

Then we have Gunny Draper (Frankie Adams), who absolutely wants war. She’s a hammer in search of a nail, pissed off that her Martian military bosses blew up Phoebe instead of letting her team get boots on the ground. She’s a Full Metal Bitch who wants terraforming for Mars yesterday and dominance over Earth in order to get it. We only get a glimpse of her as a blunt object with serious skills, but we’ll undoubtedly see a lot more of her this season.

The big finish of the two-episode arc is the OPA/Team Holden assault on the satellite, showcasing how gorgeous this show can be. It’s impressive and heartening to see the kind of care and money invested in science fiction TV that looks more like 2001 than the original dog-in-weird-sweater-as-alien Star Trek. We get some FUBAR maneuvers to stop a massive gun and, just what every hostile takeover needs, FedEx trucks with soldiers inside.

Miller leads a team unafraid to waste bullets to a room full of pre-cog-looking data slaves, managing to save one before cornering the lead scientist (Daniel Kash) and getting the exact opposite answer they were expecting.

Here’s a little slice of brilliance, highlighting how great bigthink sci-fi can be even in the midst of all the explosions and ass-kicking. Holden and Miller and Johnson are on a mission to avenge a genocide, only to discover that the Eros infection was a test in service of ultimately saving the entire human race from an extra-solar, alien life force. Like using animals to create diabetes medication, the scientist sacrificed Eros in order to learn enough about the Protomolecule to harness its power for good. What if we could become our own Gods? What if we could push beyond the natural limitations that demand our technology progress?

A blast to the head quiets those philosophies. Miller gets his revenge, and we’re all left wide-eyed, waiting for the fallout.

SOME SPARE THOUGHTS:

It’s really nice to know Lagavulin is still high quality in our great-grandchildren’s time. Since 1816!
Quality FedEx product placement.
Johnson spacing that Black Sky braggart offers a fascinating insight into how groups are compelled to action. His opening argument is a bribe about jobs, which evolves into an appeal to duty, valor, and vengeance.
The other dominant themes are unethical dreamers (“We could be our own Gods!” “Mars can have it all!”) and how each of us responds to a first shot. Pride is not strength, everyone. Words to live by.

Images: NBC/SyFy

THE MAGICIANS Recap: The Squad Prepares for the Beast Showdown In ‘Hotel Spa Potions’

Warning: this recap contains spoilers from Wednesday’s episode of The Magicians, “Hotel Spa Potions.” It is a recap, after all. Don’t say we didn’t warn you …

The Magicians has taught us over and over again that magic is not the answer to any problem. In fact, it’s usually the cause of all problems! We learned that lesson pretty early on in season one, but it has taken Quentin, Alice, Penny, Margo, and Eliot a little bit longer to learn, slowly but surely. Wednesday’s episode, “Hotel Spa Potions”, saw Eliot of all people take a giant step forward in that regard. Who would have thought that Eliot would become known as the Shit King, literally, rather than the Champagne King? Definitely not us, and most certainly not Eliot himself. The times, they are a-changing, y’all.

Quentin, Alice, Margo, and Penny jumped through the fountain and made their way back to Brakebills to find the battle magic that a previous King or Queen of Fillory had at the school over a hundred years ago. The workbook detailed a spell called the Rynaman Ultra that had enough power to kill the Beast before he could drain the magical wellspring any more, killing magic everywhere. The gang enlisted Dean Fogg’s help in finding the professor who taught it, since she was fired when battle magic was taken off the syllabus a long time ago. Professor Bigby, a 500-year-old pixie, hid all the battle magic spells in the library on campus, and they had to figure out a bunch of puzzles and anagrams to find the right book. However, Bigby ripped out the spell they needed so they went on a day trip to her home to get it back.

They found found cheerful troublemaker Bigby in Rhode Island, and it turned out that she had a history with Dean Fogg! It was hilarious to see the usually buttoned-up professor let a little loose, giggling with his old flame while Alice and Quentin tried to convince her to give them the battle magic spell she used to help win the Civil War and Rupert Chatwin used to win WWII. With Dean Fogg’s help, she ultimately gave them the spell, but it came with a word of warning: when Alice uses it on the Beast, the blast will kill anyone within 20 feet of them. Since Q knew that Julia was currently teamed up with the Beast, he knew he had to warn her.

Meanwhile, Eliot quickly learned the hard way that ruling an entire magical world is more than just sitting on a throne, wearing a crown and cool clothes, and drinking champagne (which he still can’t get to taste right). His new world was full of issues he had to fix: his people were starving and magic wasn’t the solution but the problem. Ever since it was drained from their land, their crops stopped growing. So he had to dig down, deep down, risking migraines, all to reveal a secret he had always tried to keep buried: he grew up on a farm. That made him the perfect candidate to help Fillory to farm their food naturally and without magic … by using poop to fertilize the lands. It worked, of course, and Eliot’s shit reign began!

Back in the real world, the Beast abducted hedge witch Marina to use her as bait so that Julia and he could kill Reynard. Julia also continued to refuse the Beast’s offer to cut off her shade, which is promising. If she keeps her humanity, there’s still hope for her, right? Marina, refusing to get caught up with a rapist, murderer god with a penchant for hedge witches, escaped and went to Brakebills for asylum, knowing she wasn’t safe from Reynard herself. When Dean Fogg refused to help her after all she had done in the past, she went right back to team up with the Beast and Julia, not knowing she was going to be the bait for Reynard.

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Later that night, Q secretly reached out to Julia, letting her know about the group’s plan to kill the Beast and how she can’t be within 20 feet of the blast when it happens, as he wanted to make sure his BFF was safe. But she got angry that they wouldn’t (or couldn’t) wait to kill the Beast until after he helped her kill Reynard. However, that didn’t stop her from making sure that Q knew about the Beast’s mysterious curse on the Fillorian castle, whatever that may be. At least now he has a vague idea to expect something nasty from the castle.

Meanwhile Penny’s hands still suck. No surprise there! Margo made him a temporary quick fix in the form of a potion, but he needed to figure out a permanent solution, so one of the Brakebills professors, Pearl Sunderland, helped him with a spell. He hit on her during the spell, unsuccessfully, but at least the spell itself was successful, as long as he kept some cool silver bracelets on his wrists forever. Somehow I don’t think that’s the perfect solution he was hoping for, but it works.

Then Dean Fogg had a pow-wow deep in a basement of Brakebills with Quentin, Alice, Margo, and Penny. He got all of them very, very drunk to help with the pain of getting a giant back tattoo where a Cacodemon would live, growing until it was big enough to distract the Beast while Alice cast her big spell. Their Cacodemons were a one-time-use only, though. Those tats are forever!

The hour ended with Q, Alice, Penny, and Margo returning to the castle in Fillory, surprising Eliot just as he was about to celebrate his first big achievement as King. Time to party with poop plants!

MAGICAL MUSINGS:

It’s interesting to note that our core four royals weren’t the first Brakebills students to find Fillory or even ascend the throne, as the battle magic book they found in the castle armory was a Brakebills student workbook.
The Beast knows something we don’t about becoming royalty in Fillory, as he told Julia that her friends “won’t be royals long.” Uh oh. Turns out that he put a curse on the castle a long time ago out of revenge since Ember made it impossible for him to take the throne himself. “It’s a royal test that no one ever passed.” Let’s hope our core four pass.
Color this one under shocking developments: the Beast loves singing. Like cabaret sung at the top of his longs kind of singing. He sings on the streets of New York, in Julia’s apartment, wherever, whenever … much to Julia’s deep annoyance. He’s got a nice voice, but man is that irritating after a while.
Alice’s bracelet started to burn, meaning her “god power juice” was starting to fade. Their ability to kill the Beast had an expiration date, and it is coming fast!

QUALITY QUOTES:

Dean Fog to Quentin, Alice, Margo and Penny when they return to Brakebills after their failed showdown with the Beast: “You’re alive. What a lovely surprise.”

Quentin looking at a blank patch of grass where the Physical Kids’ Cottage used to be: “Wait the cottage was here, right?”

Alice: “It’s not invisible. It’s just … not!”

Margo after a beat: “Aw shit. Right. End of semester prank to ditch the first-year losers. I should have remembered, it was my idea.”

Penny: “Are you … ? I hate all of you. I hate all of you.”

Quentin: “Let’s just find the cottage please?”

Eliot’s new Fillorian wife Fen: “The people are starving!”

Eliot: “Seriously? Okay we should probably get on that.”

Josh, after deserting everyone in Fillory to escape back to Brakebills before the Beast showdown: “It is good to see you guys.”

Penny: “Yeah, f-k off.”

Josh: “Okay.”

Eliot trying to convince Fen to have an orgy with a bunch of their subjects: “You’re great … for who you are. It’s just, I already told you, my life was different before.”

Fen: “Yeah, and I’ll help you make a new life.”

Eliot: “Well, this is new. And right inside the lines of marriage! We just do what we do in bed, and they do what they do. I only picked people already doing each other. And we get to watch! You guys are all cool with this, right? [All the naked subjects nod] See?”

Fen: “You’re their king! They will do as you wish no matter how –”

Eliot with a smile: “Fun.”

Fen, looking shocked: “Debased.”

Eliot laughs: “Debased? Honey love, I’ve been doing this shit since I was 12. Except on a computer.”

Fen: “I don’t know what that means.”

Eliot: “Boys! The shit.”

Random farmer in Fillory as Eliot delivers bags of “fertilizer” aka poop: “Um … sire, I do not wish to appear ungrateful …”

Eliot: “You’re just going to have to trust your king on this one. Come on lads, many a farm to grace with … our royal dung!”

Penny, as Professor Sunderland rubs his shoulders while doing a spell as his hands are tied behind his back: “I feel guilty.”

Sunderland: “Why?”

Penny: “Letting you do all the work.”

Sunderland: “I don’t mind.”

Penny: “Still if there’s anything I can do for you, let me know.”

Sunderland: “I don’t think you’re in a position to do much.”

Penny, trying to kiss her: “Try me.”

Sunderland: “I might … after you graduate.”

Quentin, wasted and about to get his back tattoo: “Well, I can never get buried in a Jewish cemetery.”

Alice: “Are you even Jewish?”

Quentin: “No. Options.”

Penny: “How much do I have to drink so that I never have to hear your voice again?”

Eliot, as Quentin, Alice, Penny and Margo returned to the Fillorian castle after a long time away: “Your High King has agricultural tales to tell. I give you … the Reign of King Shit.”

What did you think of this week’s episode of The Magicians? Tweet me your thoughts and opinions at @SydneyBucksbaum!

Images: Syfy

The Magicians airs Wednesdays at 9 p.m. on Syfy.

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