Luke Green's Blog, page 3
December 29, 2011
Should be caught up now.
Sorry for the blog deluge there, but there isn't an option to link my deviantart journal to the blog here and rather than post some and forget to post the rest, I just posted them all, though in somewhat mixed order.
I chose not to post the book reviews here, since I'm already posting those on the individual books I've read. And I'm not sure about posting my "great artists" links here or not. That's a lot of image linking, especially on the Infinite Silence/ROE-MESQUITA pair and some of them are rather racy.
Well...I think they're rather racy, other people tell me they're somewhat tame...then again, maybe I just hang out with people more edgy than I am.
Anyway...as to the Character Profile pieces...I run polls and votes off of my DA account, due to the way things work, one of the votes is always going to be me, because I can't see vote status unless I also vote.
I've complained to DA about this.
You can see the polls here: http://thrythlind.deviantart.com/jour...
The current poll is requesting character profile on the three girls from Divine Blood who are collectively called the "Harem" by editors, pre-readers and in-story characters alike. So that's likely what will be coming later today.
I chose not to post the book reviews here, since I'm already posting those on the individual books I've read. And I'm not sure about posting my "great artists" links here or not. That's a lot of image linking, especially on the Infinite Silence/ROE-MESQUITA pair and some of them are rather racy.
Well...I think they're rather racy, other people tell me they're somewhat tame...then again, maybe I just hang out with people more edgy than I am.
Anyway...as to the Character Profile pieces...I run polls and votes off of my DA account, due to the way things work, one of the votes is always going to be me, because I can't see vote status unless I also vote.
I've complained to DA about this.
You can see the polls here: http://thrythlind.deviantart.com/jour...
The current poll is requesting character profile on the three girls from Divine Blood who are collectively called the "Harem" by editors, pre-readers and in-story characters alike. So that's likely what will be coming later today.
Deimosu Semezou Character Profile
World Setting: Divine Blood
Status: Published:
Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B006ESG092
DrivethruRPG: http://rpg.drivethrustuff.com/product...
Lulu-Print: http://www.lulu.com/product/paperback...
Age: 16
Height: 6'
Weight: 215 lbs
Hair: Blond
Eyes: Blue
Complexion: Healthy tan
Ethnicity: Greek-Japanese
Nationality: Australian (by descent)
Home: Vollstahl, Australia
Languages: English, Greek, Japanese
Quotes:
"Well, this is off to a wonderful start."
"Without respect behind it, manners are just another sort of insult. Since I'd rather not be insulting, I'll just be rude."
"And Okaasan is going to nail her hide to the wall."
"Are you planning to blow anything up today? Or should I say anyone?"
"You really have no idea about my mother."
"Why don't we have that challenge now?"
Abilities:
Channeling: Deimosu is a very talented and skilled channeler, primarily using the skill to enhance his own physical abilities and sometimes a protective aura. He most certainly knows how to produce blasts, but seems to prefer using his own inborn abilities of electrokinesis.
Cloaking: Deimosu is unable to form a perfect cloak the way Eija can, but can dilute his presence so that he is harder to see at a distance. Also, due to the imperfect nature of the cloak, he is still able to use other channeling effects.
Electrokinesis: He is able to sense and control electrical energy and impulses around him to a very fine degree of control ranging from bolstering or interfering with electrical equipment to launching lightning bolts.
Skills:
Martial Artist: Similar to his sisters, Deimosu is a well-trained martial artist. His family style has roots in jujutsu and has been supplemented by pankration, savate, stav and a few other styles. He leans more toward a practical mix of the hard styles. Of the teenagers, he has the most technical skill with martial arts.
Weaknesses:
Arrogance: Deimosu is overprotective of his sisters, especially Eija. He tends to lose sight of the fact that he is capable of making mistakes.
Appearance: Deimosu is tall, well built blond and blue-eyed. He doesn't smile all that much, when he does it is usually a smug sort of smirk. He tends to watch things very carefully. His taste in clothes is very practical. He has a few scars from past battles, but they are all rather faint. His skin is a very healthy, almost bronze tan. He doesn't show much of his Japanese heritage save a little about the eyes.
Personality: Deimosu is an overbearing, self-assured and self-appointed guardian. He has a very definite tendency towards anger especially when someone is doing something that offends his sense of morality or harms one of his sisters. He does have a gentle-side that is rarely seen. Deimosu never lets his guard down and he is always aware of what he calls the "ragged world", by which he means the dangerous people and things within the world that most people don't usually pay attention to. He is uncomfortable with the way Naiki never seems to pay attention to dangers around and is even more uncomfortable with the way Eija seems to be trying to turn away from looking at it.
Background: Deimosu is one of the three Semezou triplets and has lived most of his life moving from place to place in Western Europe. At one point around the age of nine or ten an incident occurred which almost resulted in Eija's death and he feels as if he is directly responsible for it. Since then, he has devoted himself to improving his skills and staying aware of all the danger around him and his family.
Divine Blood: Semester Start
Status: Published:
Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B006ESG092
DrivethruRPG: http://rpg.drivethrustuff.com/product...
Lulu-Print: http://www.lulu.com/product/paperback...
Age: 16
Height: 6'
Weight: 215 lbs
Hair: Blond
Eyes: Blue
Complexion: Healthy tan
Ethnicity: Greek-Japanese
Nationality: Australian (by descent)
Home: Vollstahl, Australia
Languages: English, Greek, Japanese
Quotes:
"Well, this is off to a wonderful start."
"Without respect behind it, manners are just another sort of insult. Since I'd rather not be insulting, I'll just be rude."
"And Okaasan is going to nail her hide to the wall."
"Are you planning to blow anything up today? Or should I say anyone?"
"You really have no idea about my mother."
"Why don't we have that challenge now?"
Abilities:
Channeling: Deimosu is a very talented and skilled channeler, primarily using the skill to enhance his own physical abilities and sometimes a protective aura. He most certainly knows how to produce blasts, but seems to prefer using his own inborn abilities of electrokinesis.
Cloaking: Deimosu is unable to form a perfect cloak the way Eija can, but can dilute his presence so that he is harder to see at a distance. Also, due to the imperfect nature of the cloak, he is still able to use other channeling effects.
Electrokinesis: He is able to sense and control electrical energy and impulses around him to a very fine degree of control ranging from bolstering or interfering with electrical equipment to launching lightning bolts.
Skills:
Martial Artist: Similar to his sisters, Deimosu is a well-trained martial artist. His family style has roots in jujutsu and has been supplemented by pankration, savate, stav and a few other styles. He leans more toward a practical mix of the hard styles. Of the teenagers, he has the most technical skill with martial arts.
Weaknesses:
Arrogance: Deimosu is overprotective of his sisters, especially Eija. He tends to lose sight of the fact that he is capable of making mistakes.
Appearance: Deimosu is tall, well built blond and blue-eyed. He doesn't smile all that much, when he does it is usually a smug sort of smirk. He tends to watch things very carefully. His taste in clothes is very practical. He has a few scars from past battles, but they are all rather faint. His skin is a very healthy, almost bronze tan. He doesn't show much of his Japanese heritage save a little about the eyes.
Personality: Deimosu is an overbearing, self-assured and self-appointed guardian. He has a very definite tendency towards anger especially when someone is doing something that offends his sense of morality or harms one of his sisters. He does have a gentle-side that is rarely seen. Deimosu never lets his guard down and he is always aware of what he calls the "ragged world", by which he means the dangerous people and things within the world that most people don't usually pay attention to. He is uncomfortable with the way Naiki never seems to pay attention to dangers around and is even more uncomfortable with the way Eija seems to be trying to turn away from looking at it.
Background: Deimosu is one of the three Semezou triplets and has lived most of his life moving from place to place in Western Europe. At one point around the age of nine or ten an incident occurred which almost resulted in Eija's death and he feels as if he is directly responsible for it. Since then, he has devoted himself to improving his skills and staying aware of all the danger around him and his family.
Divine Blood: Semester Start
Stories will stop surprising you
There's a piece of advice I heard somewhere once, long ago.
"Don't read a story about something you're an expert in."
This extends to watching TV shows and movies and probably video games and the like.
The basic concept here is that if you are an expert in, say, mortars you might find yourself driven into a frothing at the mouth nitpickers rage when a roleplaying game book vastly underrates this weapon of which you know much. Likewise, if you know a lot about a particular skill or subject matter, then you will find yourself nitpicking any fiction involving the subject to death.
Now.
Think about this for a moment.
If you're interested in this or a number of my other blog posts, then you are likely trying to become a better writer.
If you are trying to become a better writer, then you are trying to become a better storyteller.
A storyteller is an expert on what now?
Stories.
The more skilled you become as a storyteller, the more difficult it will be for a fellow writer to really surprise you. You're never going to completely shut off that growing part of you that analyzes stories and picks out the most likely directions.
There are a surprisingly few basic plotlines out there and if you've made much use out of them, you can usually predict which a specific story will follow with the first few scenes.
As an example of what I mean, while I was in Korea, I saw Jet Li's Hero in Chinese with Korean subtitles. I speak no Chinese and my Korean consisted of a handful of practical phrases I had to use everyday. Not to mention the fact that the hangul flashed by too quickly for me to get more than one or two words.
Seriously folks, it took me a Korean-English dictionary and thirty mintues to read the opening dialogue to the first Neverwinter Nights game when I tried to read it in Korean, as compared to two minutes in English.
Anyway, the day after seeing Hero, I was in the teacher's office area and I started to discuss the movie and one of the teachers who saw it with me mentioned he wished that he had been able to understand the talking so that he could follow the story. At which point I gave the office a scene by scene analysis of the movie and what was happening during each scene.
When I was done, the Korean teacher who did most of our interactions with the bosses and parents for us asked me if I spoke Chinese or if I could read the Korean subtitles. I responded "no" and he asked how I understood the movie so well.
My answer: "I watched it."
It just seemed so very clear to me that the overly colorful segments were each side's stories about what was happening and I happened to be right.
This isn't to say that you will never be surprised by a story again, you most certainly will. In fact, I can guarantee that you're developing writers mind will occasionally play tricks on you by convincing you that something is going to go one way when the author decides to go another.
Which is part of why I told you to be familiar with tropes in an earlier blog, so that you can stick it to us arrogant expert storytellers.
In fact, even if you know what's going to happen, a story can still be enjoyable. Think of how many times the Greek myths have been retold or the story of Dracula and Frankenstein. We know Snow White lives happily ever after and we know that Arthur, Guinevere and Launcelot have a tragic ending. We know that Old Monkey discovers enlightenment.
Heck, just imagine all the historical dramas that are done over and over again.
Even more. Think of how many times you rewatch or reread your favorite movies and books.
Even if the stories have a much harder time surprising you, you will probably come to enjoy them more as you start appreciating the complexities of even a very simple story.
However, you'll probably start developing into this before you realize it and might fall to the temptation of believing that the movie or book is clearly inferior because it is so easily predicted. You'll need to resist that feeling. Because the better the writer you are, the more you start to lift yourself out of the target audience.
Like a magician watching another magician, your enjoyment of fiction will come from appreciating the technique and choices of the other storyteller.
Now...when you do find something the piques your emotions and knocks you for a loop...
It will be so much more surprising and wonderful than you remembered.
"Don't read a story about something you're an expert in."
This extends to watching TV shows and movies and probably video games and the like.
The basic concept here is that if you are an expert in, say, mortars you might find yourself driven into a frothing at the mouth nitpickers rage when a roleplaying game book vastly underrates this weapon of which you know much. Likewise, if you know a lot about a particular skill or subject matter, then you will find yourself nitpicking any fiction involving the subject to death.
Now.
Think about this for a moment.
If you're interested in this or a number of my other blog posts, then you are likely trying to become a better writer.
If you are trying to become a better writer, then you are trying to become a better storyteller.
A storyteller is an expert on what now?
Stories.
The more skilled you become as a storyteller, the more difficult it will be for a fellow writer to really surprise you. You're never going to completely shut off that growing part of you that analyzes stories and picks out the most likely directions.
There are a surprisingly few basic plotlines out there and if you've made much use out of them, you can usually predict which a specific story will follow with the first few scenes.
As an example of what I mean, while I was in Korea, I saw Jet Li's Hero in Chinese with Korean subtitles. I speak no Chinese and my Korean consisted of a handful of practical phrases I had to use everyday. Not to mention the fact that the hangul flashed by too quickly for me to get more than one or two words.
Seriously folks, it took me a Korean-English dictionary and thirty mintues to read the opening dialogue to the first Neverwinter Nights game when I tried to read it in Korean, as compared to two minutes in English.
Anyway, the day after seeing Hero, I was in the teacher's office area and I started to discuss the movie and one of the teachers who saw it with me mentioned he wished that he had been able to understand the talking so that he could follow the story. At which point I gave the office a scene by scene analysis of the movie and what was happening during each scene.
When I was done, the Korean teacher who did most of our interactions with the bosses and parents for us asked me if I spoke Chinese or if I could read the Korean subtitles. I responded "no" and he asked how I understood the movie so well.
My answer: "I watched it."
It just seemed so very clear to me that the overly colorful segments were each side's stories about what was happening and I happened to be right.
This isn't to say that you will never be surprised by a story again, you most certainly will. In fact, I can guarantee that you're developing writers mind will occasionally play tricks on you by convincing you that something is going to go one way when the author decides to go another.
Which is part of why I told you to be familiar with tropes in an earlier blog, so that you can stick it to us arrogant expert storytellers.
In fact, even if you know what's going to happen, a story can still be enjoyable. Think of how many times the Greek myths have been retold or the story of Dracula and Frankenstein. We know Snow White lives happily ever after and we know that Arthur, Guinevere and Launcelot have a tragic ending. We know that Old Monkey discovers enlightenment.
Heck, just imagine all the historical dramas that are done over and over again.
Even more. Think of how many times you rewatch or reread your favorite movies and books.
Even if the stories have a much harder time surprising you, you will probably come to enjoy them more as you start appreciating the complexities of even a very simple story.
However, you'll probably start developing into this before you realize it and might fall to the temptation of believing that the movie or book is clearly inferior because it is so easily predicted. You'll need to resist that feeling. Because the better the writer you are, the more you start to lift yourself out of the target audience.
Like a magician watching another magician, your enjoyment of fiction will come from appreciating the technique and choices of the other storyteller.
Now...when you do find something the piques your emotions and knocks you for a loop...
It will be so much more surprising and wonderful than you remembered.
Contrivance
There is a common complaint about fiction that you hear when someone has decided that a particular story is poorly explained, managed or otherwise unbelievable.
"It's contrived."
The thing about this statement.
It's true.
When talking about fiction, it is always going to be true.
A work of fiction is, by definition, contrived. It is a made up story with made up circumstances and made up people. Everything about any piece of fiction is contrived to some degree.
So it will always be contrived. Now, however, you have to figure out what is wrong with your story that someone would be using that statement.
This is basically the equivalent of the man in the magician's audience who points out an explanation of every trick as he watches it and thus ruining the illusion.
What the problem is, in this case, is that you have stretched things to a point that the reader is no longer engaged in a willing suspension of disbelief. Their are a lot of ways that this could happen, some of which aren't under your control.
The questions and statements that follow "it's contrived" will tell you more than that particular statement will. Because their follow up statements and questions will target on the parts of the story that they are having trouble believing.
In some cases, a particular scene will quite obviously be directed at answering these questions. For instance, the Time Travel chapter of Ryoko Saotome was made to specifically answer questions of "why doesn't Washu send them back in time and fix things?"
However, it is always best if you never have to deviate from your planned path to answer such questions.
Also, there will be some people that simply don't enjoy your genre of story. Someone who does not like or read fantasy will often find any sort of explanation of magic or supernatural abilities to be contrived, for example. There isn't much you can do about this situation, you can't directly change the sort of stories that a person likes.
Minimizing this situation, however, is the reason that you should have a pre-reader who is not a part of your target audience. You'll want your story to be entertaining to the broadest range of people as possible. As such, when testing it out, you want to be able to test it with the mainstream population or with other side populations, if the mainstream is your target.
Just to wrap up: all fiction is a contrivance. The question you want to answer is "why does he notice it's a contrivance?"
"It's contrived."
The thing about this statement.
It's true.
When talking about fiction, it is always going to be true.
A work of fiction is, by definition, contrived. It is a made up story with made up circumstances and made up people. Everything about any piece of fiction is contrived to some degree.
So it will always be contrived. Now, however, you have to figure out what is wrong with your story that someone would be using that statement.
This is basically the equivalent of the man in the magician's audience who points out an explanation of every trick as he watches it and thus ruining the illusion.
What the problem is, in this case, is that you have stretched things to a point that the reader is no longer engaged in a willing suspension of disbelief. Their are a lot of ways that this could happen, some of which aren't under your control.
The questions and statements that follow "it's contrived" will tell you more than that particular statement will. Because their follow up statements and questions will target on the parts of the story that they are having trouble believing.
In some cases, a particular scene will quite obviously be directed at answering these questions. For instance, the Time Travel chapter of Ryoko Saotome was made to specifically answer questions of "why doesn't Washu send them back in time and fix things?"
However, it is always best if you never have to deviate from your planned path to answer such questions.
Also, there will be some people that simply don't enjoy your genre of story. Someone who does not like or read fantasy will often find any sort of explanation of magic or supernatural abilities to be contrived, for example. There isn't much you can do about this situation, you can't directly change the sort of stories that a person likes.
Minimizing this situation, however, is the reason that you should have a pre-reader who is not a part of your target audience. You'll want your story to be entertaining to the broadest range of people as possible. As such, when testing it out, you want to be able to test it with the mainstream population or with other side populations, if the mainstream is your target.
Just to wrap up: all fiction is a contrivance. The question you want to answer is "why does he notice it's a contrivance?"
Dobrek Character Profile
World Setting: Greenwater
Status: Published:
Amazon Part 1: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0040JHT1U
DrivethruRPG Part 1: http://rpg.drivethrustuff.com/product...
Amazon Part 2: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0040JHT0Q
DrivethruRPG Part 2: http://rpg.drivethrustuff.com/product...
Age: 37
Height: 5'8"
Weight: 169 lbs
Hair: Brown
Eyes: Brown
Complexion: Dark
Ethnicity: Drenon Ffolk
Nationality: Confederacy
Home: None
Languages: Ffolk, possibly others
Quotes:
"Excuse me, sir, I do believe that was an insult. Perhaps you think in my current situation, that an armed fellow like yourself could handle me quite easily."
"There is war here, and where there is war, there is opportunity."
"Indeed, I can imagine it would require a certain state of mind for you to consider challenging me? Did you not find a tavern last night?"
"Forgive my rudeness, Peer Dagnon, but I did not think much of your guest."
"Mipeer Dagnon, do you see Goblins in the woods?"
Abilities:
Nothing supernatural
Skills:
Master Swordsman: Where he acquired his skill isn't quite known, but Dobrek is certainly a master swordsman who is never seen quite losing his cool in the midst of a fight.
Insight: In addition to being a master swordsman, Dobrek has a keen eye for looking at the hidden motives and situations in the world around him.
Appearance: Dobrek is a typically Drenon Ffolk, of mixed ancestry between Confedrate Core Ffolk and the Rolsarni. He has dark skin and an overall slender build, though he is a bit taller than pure-blooded Rolsarni. He dresses according to his circumstances, not appearing to have much care for what sort of clothes he wears, though he keeps them in good, comfortable repair.
Personality: Dobrek is erudite and speaks well above the station he appears to have as one of Drenon's peasantry. He tends to speak in a dry tone and doesn't let himself get worked up very often. He clearly has a sense of humor that borders on the snarky, but at the same time shows as being used to and comfortable with life as a soldier where as most of the criminals he was volunteered with remain recalcitrant and rebellious. He especially protective of the young Morriga Dagnon, the aristocratic archer who has also volunteered as a scout, though he has not explained why or even admitted that he does.
Background: Dobrek is a duelist, a man who makes his money by being paid to trick people into provoking a fight so that he might kill them in self-defense. He was among the group of criminals that Drenon sent south to Greenwater as "volunteers". There isn't much known of his past before becoming a hired duelist, but his speech betrays a clear education and his attitudes seem to indicate that he has done military service in the past.
**************************
Note: Kickstarter project for the Divine Blood Roleplaying Supplement has reached $186/$1000.
See the site for details: http://kck.st/t6fJxK
Greenwater Part One: Leaving Home
Greenwater Part 2: Setting the Board
Status: Published:
Amazon Part 1: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0040JHT1U
DrivethruRPG Part 1: http://rpg.drivethrustuff.com/product...
Amazon Part 2: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0040JHT0Q
DrivethruRPG Part 2: http://rpg.drivethrustuff.com/product...
Age: 37
Height: 5'8"
Weight: 169 lbs
Hair: Brown
Eyes: Brown
Complexion: Dark
Ethnicity: Drenon Ffolk
Nationality: Confederacy
Home: None
Languages: Ffolk, possibly others
Quotes:
"Excuse me, sir, I do believe that was an insult. Perhaps you think in my current situation, that an armed fellow like yourself could handle me quite easily."
"There is war here, and where there is war, there is opportunity."
"Indeed, I can imagine it would require a certain state of mind for you to consider challenging me? Did you not find a tavern last night?"
"Forgive my rudeness, Peer Dagnon, but I did not think much of your guest."
"Mipeer Dagnon, do you see Goblins in the woods?"
Abilities:
Nothing supernatural
Skills:
Master Swordsman: Where he acquired his skill isn't quite known, but Dobrek is certainly a master swordsman who is never seen quite losing his cool in the midst of a fight.
Insight: In addition to being a master swordsman, Dobrek has a keen eye for looking at the hidden motives and situations in the world around him.
Appearance: Dobrek is a typically Drenon Ffolk, of mixed ancestry between Confedrate Core Ffolk and the Rolsarni. He has dark skin and an overall slender build, though he is a bit taller than pure-blooded Rolsarni. He dresses according to his circumstances, not appearing to have much care for what sort of clothes he wears, though he keeps them in good, comfortable repair.
Personality: Dobrek is erudite and speaks well above the station he appears to have as one of Drenon's peasantry. He tends to speak in a dry tone and doesn't let himself get worked up very often. He clearly has a sense of humor that borders on the snarky, but at the same time shows as being used to and comfortable with life as a soldier where as most of the criminals he was volunteered with remain recalcitrant and rebellious. He especially protective of the young Morriga Dagnon, the aristocratic archer who has also volunteered as a scout, though he has not explained why or even admitted that he does.
Background: Dobrek is a duelist, a man who makes his money by being paid to trick people into provoking a fight so that he might kill them in self-defense. He was among the group of criminals that Drenon sent south to Greenwater as "volunteers". There isn't much known of his past before becoming a hired duelist, but his speech betrays a clear education and his attitudes seem to indicate that he has done military service in the past.
**************************
Note: Kickstarter project for the Divine Blood Roleplaying Supplement has reached $186/$1000.
See the site for details: http://kck.st/t6fJxK
Greenwater Part One: Leaving Home
Greenwater Part 2: Setting the Board
Adrasteia Character Profile
World Setting: Zodiacs
Status: Published:
Title: Siege at Berutuha
Link to purchase on Kindle: http://www.amazon.com/Zodiacs-Siege-a...
Link to purchase on Lulu: http://www.lulu.com/product/paperback...
Title: Zodiacs Campaign Guide
Link to purchase on Kindle: http://www.amazon.com/Zodiacs-Campaig...
Link to purchase on Lulu: http://www.lulu.com/product/paperback...
Link to purchase on DrivethruRPG: http://rpg.drivethrustuff.com/product...
Name: Adrasteia of House Apopka
Aliases: Shiva-Chudail, the Bharita Witch
Age: At least 90
Height: 5'4"
Weight: 99 lbs
Hair: Greying Black
Eyes: Brown
Complexion: Dark
Ethnicity: Kshatriya
Nationality: Bharita, formerly
Home: Unknown
Languages: Many
Quotes:
"Heaven will stop me, eventually."
"Really, it took me ten years to build a servant valuable enough that her death would warrant such a display, and you were not part of that plan."
"Ahh, the whispered taste of innocence. I remember well these days of harmless, pointless rebellion."
"There is very little in the world that I am still tied to. I cannot afford to lose any more such connections."
"I don't seek redemption. I merely seek to escape punishment."
"Ah, an illness would imply that these choices are not my own, that I am deluded, unaware of the consequences, and we both know that is simply not true."
Abilities:
Magician: Adrasteia is a magician and has trained in many traditions. She started with studying the destructive spells and rituals of the Shiva-chudail from Bharita, and then acquired some grimoire from a Republican magi family. After that she stole secrets from an Imperial Wu Jen and studied the spirit summoning of the Horder rakbu. Legends say she studied with the mythical Hekate before she began her fall from grace and she has since studied the blood-magic of some of the most hated Maho-Tsukai in Ryouiki. The only tradition she hasn't drawn from are the Volstagg enchanters.
Mirrors: Mirrors are a primary magical tool of Adrasteia's. She can project herself into them and cast spells on objects reflected in them. To a lesser extent she can do this with any reflective surface. The extent of her ability to use mirrors is largely unknown.
Dreams: Adrasteia is able to enter dreams and shape them to her desires so as to give people false prophetic visions.
Fear: Her first ability and primary weapon, Adrasteia is able to instill fear heavy enough to cause heart attacks and death.
Skills:
Manipulation: Adrasteia plays with people's emotions and motivations as if they were musical instruments. This is what truly makes her dangerous, to her the magic she wields is simply one more tool towards the end of making people act the way she expects them to act.
Whips and Knives: Adrasteia is very skilled with the use of knives and whips, though her age does limit her ability in this regard.
Ancient Knowledge: Adrasteia has a large amount of knowledge of the world and the true nature of the ancient empires that stood on these lands ages before her own was even thought of. This extends to the use of several machines left behind by said ancients.
Appearance: Adrasteia appears as an aged, Bharita noble woman who is a well-preserved 60. She seems quiet and reserved even when angry. She is slim and has occasional bouts of coughing such that it seems that she is dying. Everything about her is cold but not uncaring.
Personality: Adrasteia considers herself damned and primarily is motivated to put off the moment of her final death as long as possible. She believes that final success is impossible and that she will eventually have to pay for her crimes. In her youth, she was a free-thinking young aristocrat with a friendly and calm nature, however, the societal measures isolating chudail seem to have eventually weighed her down and eroded most of her concern for other people.
Background: Adrasteia was born to a Kshatriya warrior clan and acquired an interest in ancient myths and legends as well as fighting skills, which were forbidden to women even of her caste. She was eventually revealed to be a "chudail" or magician and had her identity and status stripped from her even as she was given leave and allowance to do all manner of things as she was now a tool of the heavens. She insisted on keeping her name despite all warnings, threats and other measures and eventually came to perform many heroic deeds. Unfortunately, she then murdered her brother and staged a crippling revolution in Bharita before moving on to stir up trouble in the rest of the world. No one is quite certain what actually drove her fall into darkness, but one thing is certain. Everyone now knows her name and assigns it to her.
**************************
Note: Kickstarter project for the Divine Blood Roleplaying Supplement has reached $186/$1000.
See the site for details: http://kck.st/t6fJxK
Zodiacs: Siege at Berutuha
Zodiacs Campaign Guide
Status: Published:
Title: Siege at Berutuha
Link to purchase on Kindle: http://www.amazon.com/Zodiacs-Siege-a...
Link to purchase on Lulu: http://www.lulu.com/product/paperback...
Title: Zodiacs Campaign Guide
Link to purchase on Kindle: http://www.amazon.com/Zodiacs-Campaig...
Link to purchase on Lulu: http://www.lulu.com/product/paperback...
Link to purchase on DrivethruRPG: http://rpg.drivethrustuff.com/product...
Name: Adrasteia of House Apopka
Aliases: Shiva-Chudail, the Bharita Witch
Age: At least 90
Height: 5'4"
Weight: 99 lbs
Hair: Greying Black
Eyes: Brown
Complexion: Dark
Ethnicity: Kshatriya
Nationality: Bharita, formerly
Home: Unknown
Languages: Many
Quotes:
"Heaven will stop me, eventually."
"Really, it took me ten years to build a servant valuable enough that her death would warrant such a display, and you were not part of that plan."
"Ahh, the whispered taste of innocence. I remember well these days of harmless, pointless rebellion."
"There is very little in the world that I am still tied to. I cannot afford to lose any more such connections."
"I don't seek redemption. I merely seek to escape punishment."
"Ah, an illness would imply that these choices are not my own, that I am deluded, unaware of the consequences, and we both know that is simply not true."
Abilities:
Magician: Adrasteia is a magician and has trained in many traditions. She started with studying the destructive spells and rituals of the Shiva-chudail from Bharita, and then acquired some grimoire from a Republican magi family. After that she stole secrets from an Imperial Wu Jen and studied the spirit summoning of the Horder rakbu. Legends say she studied with the mythical Hekate before she began her fall from grace and she has since studied the blood-magic of some of the most hated Maho-Tsukai in Ryouiki. The only tradition she hasn't drawn from are the Volstagg enchanters.
Mirrors: Mirrors are a primary magical tool of Adrasteia's. She can project herself into them and cast spells on objects reflected in them. To a lesser extent she can do this with any reflective surface. The extent of her ability to use mirrors is largely unknown.
Dreams: Adrasteia is able to enter dreams and shape them to her desires so as to give people false prophetic visions.
Fear: Her first ability and primary weapon, Adrasteia is able to instill fear heavy enough to cause heart attacks and death.
Skills:
Manipulation: Adrasteia plays with people's emotions and motivations as if they were musical instruments. This is what truly makes her dangerous, to her the magic she wields is simply one more tool towards the end of making people act the way she expects them to act.
Whips and Knives: Adrasteia is very skilled with the use of knives and whips, though her age does limit her ability in this regard.
Ancient Knowledge: Adrasteia has a large amount of knowledge of the world and the true nature of the ancient empires that stood on these lands ages before her own was even thought of. This extends to the use of several machines left behind by said ancients.
Appearance: Adrasteia appears as an aged, Bharita noble woman who is a well-preserved 60. She seems quiet and reserved even when angry. She is slim and has occasional bouts of coughing such that it seems that she is dying. Everything about her is cold but not uncaring.
Personality: Adrasteia considers herself damned and primarily is motivated to put off the moment of her final death as long as possible. She believes that final success is impossible and that she will eventually have to pay for her crimes. In her youth, she was a free-thinking young aristocrat with a friendly and calm nature, however, the societal measures isolating chudail seem to have eventually weighed her down and eroded most of her concern for other people.
Background: Adrasteia was born to a Kshatriya warrior clan and acquired an interest in ancient myths and legends as well as fighting skills, which were forbidden to women even of her caste. She was eventually revealed to be a "chudail" or magician and had her identity and status stripped from her even as she was given leave and allowance to do all manner of things as she was now a tool of the heavens. She insisted on keeping her name despite all warnings, threats and other measures and eventually came to perform many heroic deeds. Unfortunately, she then murdered her brother and staged a crippling revolution in Bharita before moving on to stir up trouble in the rest of the world. No one is quite certain what actually drove her fall into darkness, but one thing is certain. Everyone now knows her name and assigns it to her.
**************************
Note: Kickstarter project for the Divine Blood Roleplaying Supplement has reached $186/$1000.
See the site for details: http://kck.st/t6fJxK
Zodiacs: Siege at Berutuha
Zodiacs Campaign Guide
If things are going smooth, don't tell the reader
One of the best examples of this comes from the Dennis Quaid movie Undercover Blues. Obviously this is something of a spoiler, so be aware.
Throughout the whole movie, the Blues portray themselves as in control of the immediate situation but still trying to figure out the larger picture. Meanwhile they pepper the conversation with things like "(Morty) could be useful" which later turns out to be true. You don't learn that they've been manipulating the larger picture all along until the end of the movie.
Likewise, Ocean's 12 has the same sort of situation where the gang is getting progressively caught more and more and thrown in jail while failing to meet the burglar's challenge. That is right up until the end when you're told that they'd met the challenge days ago, before the target object had even reached the museum.
In both cases, things were running, more or less, according to the plan but in both cases the audience was left out of some pieces of information that made it easy to see that the plan was working. They were given enough information, however, to reason out that this was happening.
For comic book people, perhaps the utmost example of this is "I did it 45 minutes ago" as spoken by Ozymandias in the Watchmen.
For webcomics, any of Dominic Deegan's plans might also qualify here.
For anime, this looks to be something like what is going on with Itachi Uchiha's plan in Naruto.
In order to keep the drama and tension of a piece, you want to show the reader that things aren't going smooth. Or rather, you want to make them come to that conclusion on their own. If you outright give them faulty information or cut out all possible clues as to the truth of the situation, then you are not following the advice about being predictable.
This isn't even the case of giving a red herring, this is more like the case of trying to pretend there isn't a masterfully cooked steak in the next room. Instead of sealing off sight, sound and smell of the steak, you probably want to seal off sight and smell and let them assume something wild about the sizzling sound.
People will leap to all manner of conclusions if you give them the slightest provocation, use that.
Then, when the end of the story comes and the wonderfully complete masterplan comes into view, the audience can be appropriately wowed by the awesome foresight of your heroes or villains.
Throughout the whole movie, the Blues portray themselves as in control of the immediate situation but still trying to figure out the larger picture. Meanwhile they pepper the conversation with things like "(Morty) could be useful" which later turns out to be true. You don't learn that they've been manipulating the larger picture all along until the end of the movie.
Likewise, Ocean's 12 has the same sort of situation where the gang is getting progressively caught more and more and thrown in jail while failing to meet the burglar's challenge. That is right up until the end when you're told that they'd met the challenge days ago, before the target object had even reached the museum.
In both cases, things were running, more or less, according to the plan but in both cases the audience was left out of some pieces of information that made it easy to see that the plan was working. They were given enough information, however, to reason out that this was happening.
For comic book people, perhaps the utmost example of this is "I did it 45 minutes ago" as spoken by Ozymandias in the Watchmen.
For webcomics, any of Dominic Deegan's plans might also qualify here.
For anime, this looks to be something like what is going on with Itachi Uchiha's plan in Naruto.
In order to keep the drama and tension of a piece, you want to show the reader that things aren't going smooth. Or rather, you want to make them come to that conclusion on their own. If you outright give them faulty information or cut out all possible clues as to the truth of the situation, then you are not following the advice about being predictable.
This isn't even the case of giving a red herring, this is more like the case of trying to pretend there isn't a masterfully cooked steak in the next room. Instead of sealing off sight, sound and smell of the steak, you probably want to seal off sight and smell and let them assume something wild about the sizzling sound.
People will leap to all manner of conclusions if you give them the slightest provocation, use that.
Then, when the end of the story comes and the wonderfully complete masterplan comes into view, the audience can be appropriately wowed by the awesome foresight of your heroes or villains.
Damir Milos Character Profile
World Setting: Divine Blood
Status: Published:
Series: Divine Blood
Volume 1
Title: Semester Start
Format: Novel - Three Acts
Genre: Sci-Fi - Paranatural
Holiday Kindle Price: $1
Print Price: $16.95
Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B006ESG092
DrivethruRPG: http://rpg.drivethrustuff.com/product...
Lulu-Print: http://www.lulu.com/product/paperback...
Age: 16
Height: 5'10"
Weight: 189 lbs
Hair: Brown
Eyes: Brown
Complexion: Average
Ethnicity: Croatian
Nationality: None
Home: Vollstahl, Australia
Languages: English, Greek, Croatian, Russian, Czech, German, Arabic, Burmese
Quotes:
"I have a civilian class C upright operations license...Which I have only used for construction work, and only in the last year."
"Why would openly threaten a clearly superior enemy? It makes no sense."
"There is an issue."
"Survival training indeed carries an extreme desire for working plumping."
"I am aware that democracy is the preferred mode of government, but is it really efficient for teenagers to be making such decisions for themselves?"
"It is no longer an issue."
Abilities:
No particular supernatural abilities beyond Mao recognizing some good potential
Skills:
Upright Pilot: Damir is an exceptional pilot, good enough to be on the Dunadan unit with Sgt Whelan and Sgt Major Desai. He makes a habit of studying the operating limits of his machines and good instincts for how far he can stretch their limits. He probably doesn't have Eowyn's level of skill, but he tends to lend toward more spectacular feats than she usually appreciates.
Soldier: Damir is a long-time soldier honed in the chaotic battlefields of Eastern Europe since the fall of the Soviet Union. Of the students at Bravura, he is very much the best skilled fighter when it comes to pure martial skills, enough so that he is approximately as dangerous in combat as Naiki Semezou.
Weaknesses:
Social Understanding: Damir has very little understanding of life outside of the battlefield. This results in him feeling uncomfortable and nervous when going about things on a day to day business in what most would consider a normal life.
Appearance:
Damir is a tall, wiry young man with dark hair and pale skin. He has a semi-circular scar over his left eye. He moves as economically as possible, with very little wasted motion. Though it is not often visible, he also has an electrical scar along his left arm from a faulty upright interface. He dresses in uniforms primarily, and rarely appears in anything that could be called casual wear. He rarely smiles and usually has a rather bland expression on his face.
Personality: Damir is very straightforward and it is hard to tell sometimes whether or not he has a sense of humor since he sometimes says things that could be taken as evidence of a dry wit while appearing to have no awareness of the potential humor value of his own statements. He is very cautious and reserved, not only for his own sake but for the sake of those around him. Barring any instructions to the contrary, he tends to default towards protecting the people around him and acting like a body guard of sorts. He prefers to not expose civilians towards witnessing the necessities of combat if at all possible.
Background: In the wake of the fall of Soviet Union, the various member states of Warsaw Pact started struggling to fill in the void left by the Soviet Union while other groups tried to break away from the domination of their countries. In Yugoslavia, a number of ethnic Croatians rose up against the government seeking to shrug off the yokes of their rule. They eventually stooped to using child soldiers in their rebellious activities and one of those soldiers was Damir, who has learned from an early age the use of weapons and the operation of military vehicles to a masters level. He has experienced easily as much fighting as the Semezou triplets put together, and probably has close to the same years of experience as Eowyn. At about the time he was twelve years old, he came across the path of Gaetana Trolleti who was, at the time, an asset for the Path of the Golden Dawn. The circumstances of their meeting resulted in Gaetana's successful escape from the Golden Dawn and joining Avalon while Damir slipped out into the wider world. Damir met Gaetana again two years later when he was scouted and recruited by Avalon, probably thanks to Gaetana's suggestions. He has since worked his way into the Dunadan elite unit and has been there for over a year.
**************************
Note: Kickstarter project for the Divine Blood Roleplaying Supplement has reached $186/$1000.
See the site for details: http://kck.st/t6fJxK
Divine Blood: Semester Start
Status: Published:
Series: Divine Blood
Volume 1
Title: Semester Start
Format: Novel - Three Acts
Genre: Sci-Fi - Paranatural
Holiday Kindle Price: $1
Print Price: $16.95
Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B006ESG092
DrivethruRPG: http://rpg.drivethrustuff.com/product...
Lulu-Print: http://www.lulu.com/product/paperback...
Age: 16
Height: 5'10"
Weight: 189 lbs
Hair: Brown
Eyes: Brown
Complexion: Average
Ethnicity: Croatian
Nationality: None
Home: Vollstahl, Australia
Languages: English, Greek, Croatian, Russian, Czech, German, Arabic, Burmese
Quotes:
"I have a civilian class C upright operations license...Which I have only used for construction work, and only in the last year."
"Why would openly threaten a clearly superior enemy? It makes no sense."
"There is an issue."
"Survival training indeed carries an extreme desire for working plumping."
"I am aware that democracy is the preferred mode of government, but is it really efficient for teenagers to be making such decisions for themselves?"
"It is no longer an issue."
Abilities:
No particular supernatural abilities beyond Mao recognizing some good potential
Skills:
Upright Pilot: Damir is an exceptional pilot, good enough to be on the Dunadan unit with Sgt Whelan and Sgt Major Desai. He makes a habit of studying the operating limits of his machines and good instincts for how far he can stretch their limits. He probably doesn't have Eowyn's level of skill, but he tends to lend toward more spectacular feats than she usually appreciates.
Soldier: Damir is a long-time soldier honed in the chaotic battlefields of Eastern Europe since the fall of the Soviet Union. Of the students at Bravura, he is very much the best skilled fighter when it comes to pure martial skills, enough so that he is approximately as dangerous in combat as Naiki Semezou.
Weaknesses:
Social Understanding: Damir has very little understanding of life outside of the battlefield. This results in him feeling uncomfortable and nervous when going about things on a day to day business in what most would consider a normal life.
Appearance:
Damir is a tall, wiry young man with dark hair and pale skin. He has a semi-circular scar over his left eye. He moves as economically as possible, with very little wasted motion. Though it is not often visible, he also has an electrical scar along his left arm from a faulty upright interface. He dresses in uniforms primarily, and rarely appears in anything that could be called casual wear. He rarely smiles and usually has a rather bland expression on his face.
Personality: Damir is very straightforward and it is hard to tell sometimes whether or not he has a sense of humor since he sometimes says things that could be taken as evidence of a dry wit while appearing to have no awareness of the potential humor value of his own statements. He is very cautious and reserved, not only for his own sake but for the sake of those around him. Barring any instructions to the contrary, he tends to default towards protecting the people around him and acting like a body guard of sorts. He prefers to not expose civilians towards witnessing the necessities of combat if at all possible.
Background: In the wake of the fall of Soviet Union, the various member states of Warsaw Pact started struggling to fill in the void left by the Soviet Union while other groups tried to break away from the domination of their countries. In Yugoslavia, a number of ethnic Croatians rose up against the government seeking to shrug off the yokes of their rule. They eventually stooped to using child soldiers in their rebellious activities and one of those soldiers was Damir, who has learned from an early age the use of weapons and the operation of military vehicles to a masters level. He has experienced easily as much fighting as the Semezou triplets put together, and probably has close to the same years of experience as Eowyn. At about the time he was twelve years old, he came across the path of Gaetana Trolleti who was, at the time, an asset for the Path of the Golden Dawn. The circumstances of their meeting resulted in Gaetana's successful escape from the Golden Dawn and joining Avalon while Damir slipped out into the wider world. Damir met Gaetana again two years later when he was scouted and recruited by Avalon, probably thanks to Gaetana's suggestions. He has since worked his way into the Dunadan elite unit and has been there for over a year.
**************************
Note: Kickstarter project for the Divine Blood Roleplaying Supplement has reached $186/$1000.
See the site for details: http://kck.st/t6fJxK
Divine Blood: Semester Start
Things don't ever go smooth
One of the problems with the stories that are popular, things are always going wrong. There's always some amount of unnecessary pain and fear and trouble in the world. It's stuff that could probably have been avoided if it weren't for a handful of mistakes that the story makes painfully obvious.
The crisis can be personal, such as saying the wrong thing to a girlfriend and trying to spend the rest of the story apologizing, or it can be local, such as dealing with a bank robbery. It goes on and on, with the mistakes being more obvious and seemingly extreme as you go further up the line.
But the matter is the same.
Mistakes were made and they have to be cleaned up.
Or, it could be about a succession of mistakes that were made and what it resulted in.
But it comes down to: mistakes were made.
If the real world had as much incompetence and malice as you find in reading fiction, then we would probably be living in a state of anarchic babarity out of a post-apocalyptic movie. That's because the movies and films focus only on the exceptional and rare instances where things do go wrong.
The innocent person is convicted.
The killer goes free.
A judge is bribed.
A cop is brutal and cruel.
Witnesses are killed.
These two in particular are repeated ad infinitum across a plethora of crime-centric TV shows and movies. The movies in question don't deal with the hundreds of thousands of other criminal cases that have to be taking place in the world of the movie in the background, most of which are very much open and shut cases.
There is no open and shut in a TV show.
If there is, then a lawyer has to be called in to raise a technical issue.
Or maybe the open and shut case is wrong and the suspect is innocent.
Every case is a long drawn out affair where the juries, judges and lawyers require crazily accurate forensics findings that are all but impossible for modern day crime labs to produce without bankrupting their city. And then a clever lawyer is called in to show that that inescapable evidence isn't all that clear after all.
Most of the mistakes that drive stories are made as a matter of misunderstanding an event.
In most cases, there is an underestimation of a situation. This is what happens when you have people that don't believe in the slimy monster that is killing people around town. Or, more realistically, don't believe in the existence of the charming young sociopath. In the detective story, the police are usually suffering from this mistake. Even in cases were the police are the main characters, they are underestimating the intelligence or randomness of their enemy.
In other cases, there is an overestimation of a situation. The most common situation here is when a group in power mistakenly decides that a particular individual is a threat to them and must be put down. The result is usually the creation of the very threat they were trying to prevent. This is often the situation when the story is one of oppression or the like.
In other cases, there are situations when the mistake is one of not thinking about the consequences of an action. The example earlier of insulting a loved one accidentally, or else not expecting them to pick up and leave, is one such consequence.
Good situations can be misunderstood as well.
Imagine a stock broker who spends the first fifteen minutes or so of a movie pushing a particular stock and how great it is going to be. Then imagine that the improvement of the stock is far less than what he claimed it would be. The result is that the investors, the company and the stock broker are all harmed by the man's mistake.
Now, imagine someone winning the lottery and casually mentioning it to someone else and now spending the rest of the story trying to hide and protect themselves and their ticket from people that want the money that they managed to win.
It is a difficult task to have mistakes happen and still portray the person who made the mistakes as competent. It is easier to make them completely incompetent.
I prefer not to do that.
As the public, at least the American public, we have a tendency to think of various authority figures, ranging from parents to the government, as either malicious or incompetent or both, because that is the way that they are portrayed in most stories.
One way to try to do it is to have the character notice and comment on their own mistake and give them a situation later where the enemy assumes they'll make the same mistake but don't because they've learned their lesson.
Another way to do it is to never call the reader's attention to the mistake to begin with.
You could also choose to actually have an incompetent individual in control of the situation.
The mistake could be made because of situations about which the characters couldn't possibly expect to be aware of.
There could be a danger or situation that has changed what is normal for the character so that what would normally be a perfectly reasonable action would now be a mistake.
It is a mistake to fall asleep when your building has a gas leak, but that mistake doesn't indicate incompetence if you fail to notice the gas leak or else if it starts after you go to sleep.
Then there are the stories with the supernatural and paranatural events.
We laugh and sneer at the useless adults in some sci-fi movies when they fail to believe in the monster killing people, but seriously, if a teenager came up to you and said "there's a werewolf and we need to get silver bullets to kill it" would you believe them?
How about "I didn't kill them, I was possessed by an evil spirit."?
I don't think most would believe that either.
The disbelief of the supernatural or paranatural or extraterrestrials is a reasonable reaction. However, a lot of movies and scripts feel that they have to emphasize the mistake and point out that, yes, the cops are incompetent, by having them act needlessly dismissive or even rude about the reports.
We look at these clownishly rude people with our outsider's knowledge that there really is a monster and we then condemn them as incompetent.
On the other hand, you could have a clearly polite and competent police officer still disbelieve the report.
Of course, it is easier to make people incompetent to explain the mistakes, but I still prefer to avoid the tendency to make the fault of the story belong to someone who clearly should never have had their job in the first place.
The crisis can be personal, such as saying the wrong thing to a girlfriend and trying to spend the rest of the story apologizing, or it can be local, such as dealing with a bank robbery. It goes on and on, with the mistakes being more obvious and seemingly extreme as you go further up the line.
But the matter is the same.
Mistakes were made and they have to be cleaned up.
Or, it could be about a succession of mistakes that were made and what it resulted in.
But it comes down to: mistakes were made.
If the real world had as much incompetence and malice as you find in reading fiction, then we would probably be living in a state of anarchic babarity out of a post-apocalyptic movie. That's because the movies and films focus only on the exceptional and rare instances where things do go wrong.
The innocent person is convicted.
The killer goes free.
A judge is bribed.
A cop is brutal and cruel.
Witnesses are killed.
These two in particular are repeated ad infinitum across a plethora of crime-centric TV shows and movies. The movies in question don't deal with the hundreds of thousands of other criminal cases that have to be taking place in the world of the movie in the background, most of which are very much open and shut cases.
There is no open and shut in a TV show.
If there is, then a lawyer has to be called in to raise a technical issue.
Or maybe the open and shut case is wrong and the suspect is innocent.
Every case is a long drawn out affair where the juries, judges and lawyers require crazily accurate forensics findings that are all but impossible for modern day crime labs to produce without bankrupting their city. And then a clever lawyer is called in to show that that inescapable evidence isn't all that clear after all.
Most of the mistakes that drive stories are made as a matter of misunderstanding an event.
In most cases, there is an underestimation of a situation. This is what happens when you have people that don't believe in the slimy monster that is killing people around town. Or, more realistically, don't believe in the existence of the charming young sociopath. In the detective story, the police are usually suffering from this mistake. Even in cases were the police are the main characters, they are underestimating the intelligence or randomness of their enemy.
In other cases, there is an overestimation of a situation. The most common situation here is when a group in power mistakenly decides that a particular individual is a threat to them and must be put down. The result is usually the creation of the very threat they were trying to prevent. This is often the situation when the story is one of oppression or the like.
In other cases, there are situations when the mistake is one of not thinking about the consequences of an action. The example earlier of insulting a loved one accidentally, or else not expecting them to pick up and leave, is one such consequence.
Good situations can be misunderstood as well.
Imagine a stock broker who spends the first fifteen minutes or so of a movie pushing a particular stock and how great it is going to be. Then imagine that the improvement of the stock is far less than what he claimed it would be. The result is that the investors, the company and the stock broker are all harmed by the man's mistake.
Now, imagine someone winning the lottery and casually mentioning it to someone else and now spending the rest of the story trying to hide and protect themselves and their ticket from people that want the money that they managed to win.
It is a difficult task to have mistakes happen and still portray the person who made the mistakes as competent. It is easier to make them completely incompetent.
I prefer not to do that.
As the public, at least the American public, we have a tendency to think of various authority figures, ranging from parents to the government, as either malicious or incompetent or both, because that is the way that they are portrayed in most stories.
One way to try to do it is to have the character notice and comment on their own mistake and give them a situation later where the enemy assumes they'll make the same mistake but don't because they've learned their lesson.
Another way to do it is to never call the reader's attention to the mistake to begin with.
You could also choose to actually have an incompetent individual in control of the situation.
The mistake could be made because of situations about which the characters couldn't possibly expect to be aware of.
There could be a danger or situation that has changed what is normal for the character so that what would normally be a perfectly reasonable action would now be a mistake.
It is a mistake to fall asleep when your building has a gas leak, but that mistake doesn't indicate incompetence if you fail to notice the gas leak or else if it starts after you go to sleep.
Then there are the stories with the supernatural and paranatural events.
We laugh and sneer at the useless adults in some sci-fi movies when they fail to believe in the monster killing people, but seriously, if a teenager came up to you and said "there's a werewolf and we need to get silver bullets to kill it" would you believe them?
How about "I didn't kill them, I was possessed by an evil spirit."?
I don't think most would believe that either.
The disbelief of the supernatural or paranatural or extraterrestrials is a reasonable reaction. However, a lot of movies and scripts feel that they have to emphasize the mistake and point out that, yes, the cops are incompetent, by having them act needlessly dismissive or even rude about the reports.
We look at these clownishly rude people with our outsider's knowledge that there really is a monster and we then condemn them as incompetent.
On the other hand, you could have a clearly polite and competent police officer still disbelieve the report.
Of course, it is easier to make people incompetent to explain the mistakes, but I still prefer to avoid the tendency to make the fault of the story belong to someone who clearly should never have had their job in the first place.
Don't Explain the Hammerchlorians
There are two maybe three parts to this piece of advice. And the first of these is quite well explained by the large, pear shaped individual that arrogantly spews his opinions of science-fiction and fantasy in the comic shop that's part of El Goonish Shive's world setting.
Comic in question: http://egscomics.com/?date=2010-04-26
People are going to be accepting of a lot of impossible things without needing much explanation for them to take things as fact for that world setting. In a sci-fi world, it is rather easy to simply accept cybernetic enhancement, you don't have to explain the nuts and bolts of how cybernetics work. Likewise, there's never, in thousands of pages of material, anything that nails down just how magic works in Tolkien's Middle Earth, but most of us don't care about that.
It's magic, we don't need to know what's up with it.
However, as part keeping everything consistant, it is a very good idea to have something on hand to explain to yourself just why everything works. If you have the nuts and bolts of things decided on, then your story's magic or high-tech will have a sort of consistancy that makes the reader comfortable and helps them know how dangerous or easy a particular action might be, or also answer questions such as "why don't they just travel back in time?"
In addition, at some point, something might happen in your world that requires at least some of the nuts and bolts to be explained so that the plot or setting makes some sense to the reader.
If you have not started with a system of nuts and bolts to explain how and why things work and suddenly find yourself in a position where you have to explain those nuts and bolts, then you have a problem. The actual creation of the nuts and bolts isn't the problem so much as the problem is in creating nuts and bolts that work with anything which you may have done in the past.
Especially if you've been writing said story for some time before the necessity arises.
Midichlorians never become a plot point and only serve as a method for Qui-Gon to test Anakin's potential in using the force. There was never any reason to explain that facet of the universe and it was pretty much completely ignored through all the next three movies.
However, the EGS story linked in the top is an example of when the nuts and bolts have to be explained.
In the course of the story, the Secret Origin of Tiffany Susan Pompoms (insert Freedom Force Narrator Voice), is revealed for all the readers, including a very important character defining point that changed Susan from the uncertain, shy young girl to someone who's basically tried to shut down emotionally.
The Hammers, the way she gained access to them and the way they were brought into existence are very key points of Susan's past and her following character development. Explaining them is no longer an extraneous piece meant to fluff the pages up but rather a very efficient vehicle to drive character development in not only Susan, but the other three characters as well. It also gives us a peek at the politics of being an immortal.
There ate innumerable points in that story that were useful and even necessary to reveal.
Thus, the Hammerchlorians had to be explained.
Looking toward Bystander, there is no one in the current novel that has the slightest inkling of how Lucretia's powers work. In fact, none of them have the real facts behind how people really develop superpowers at all, but rather have assumed "facts' based on the beliefs of various people.
The narration is third person, but it focuses on the thoughts of one character at a time, often a character other than Lucretia.
Even if the narrator were completely separate, however, there is no need to explain what Lucretia can do anymore than: "Lucretia has superhuman strength, toughness and senses and that's that." There's no need to describe anything more than that.
However, later in the series plan, there will come villains that are doing things that have to be defeated in ways that don't exist in the real world. The nuts and bolts of how superpowers operate will start becoming necessary at that point.
Likewise, I have only given glimpses of Lucretia's psychological make up. Right now, you only need to realize that she is a irresponsible, promiscuous alcoholic with a few mental quirks and a near compulsion for stopping bad things from happening. There isn't a need to look much deeper than that.
However, I did receive complaints from a pre-reader that I needed to explain something of the history of the world to that point. That suggestion resulted in the scene with Lucretia harranguing the college students about their topic.
It was clear that I did need to explain something of what the broader world was like.
Despite the fact that I don't need to explain those things yet, for Bystander and Greenwater each, I already have pages on pages of material which currently is meant for my eyes and the eyes of my pre-readers only. I've got history timelines, language discussions, glossaries of terms, lists of people and organizations, metaphysical write-ups and a discussion on Lucretia herself.
I have almost enough material to write an entire book showcasing the world of Bystander. After some spoilers are revealed, I might just do that for an RPG sourcebook. Until then, it is unnecessary information.
Bystander
Greenwater Part One: Leaving Home
Greenwater Part 2: Setting the Board
Comic in question: http://egscomics.com/?date=2010-04-26
People are going to be accepting of a lot of impossible things without needing much explanation for them to take things as fact for that world setting. In a sci-fi world, it is rather easy to simply accept cybernetic enhancement, you don't have to explain the nuts and bolts of how cybernetics work. Likewise, there's never, in thousands of pages of material, anything that nails down just how magic works in Tolkien's Middle Earth, but most of us don't care about that.
It's magic, we don't need to know what's up with it.
However, as part keeping everything consistant, it is a very good idea to have something on hand to explain to yourself just why everything works. If you have the nuts and bolts of things decided on, then your story's magic or high-tech will have a sort of consistancy that makes the reader comfortable and helps them know how dangerous or easy a particular action might be, or also answer questions such as "why don't they just travel back in time?"
In addition, at some point, something might happen in your world that requires at least some of the nuts and bolts to be explained so that the plot or setting makes some sense to the reader.
If you have not started with a system of nuts and bolts to explain how and why things work and suddenly find yourself in a position where you have to explain those nuts and bolts, then you have a problem. The actual creation of the nuts and bolts isn't the problem so much as the problem is in creating nuts and bolts that work with anything which you may have done in the past.
Especially if you've been writing said story for some time before the necessity arises.
Midichlorians never become a plot point and only serve as a method for Qui-Gon to test Anakin's potential in using the force. There was never any reason to explain that facet of the universe and it was pretty much completely ignored through all the next three movies.
However, the EGS story linked in the top is an example of when the nuts and bolts have to be explained.
In the course of the story, the Secret Origin of Tiffany Susan Pompoms (insert Freedom Force Narrator Voice), is revealed for all the readers, including a very important character defining point that changed Susan from the uncertain, shy young girl to someone who's basically tried to shut down emotionally.
The Hammers, the way she gained access to them and the way they were brought into existence are very key points of Susan's past and her following character development. Explaining them is no longer an extraneous piece meant to fluff the pages up but rather a very efficient vehicle to drive character development in not only Susan, but the other three characters as well. It also gives us a peek at the politics of being an immortal.
There ate innumerable points in that story that were useful and even necessary to reveal.
Thus, the Hammerchlorians had to be explained.
Looking toward Bystander, there is no one in the current novel that has the slightest inkling of how Lucretia's powers work. In fact, none of them have the real facts behind how people really develop superpowers at all, but rather have assumed "facts' based on the beliefs of various people.
The narration is third person, but it focuses on the thoughts of one character at a time, often a character other than Lucretia.
Even if the narrator were completely separate, however, there is no need to explain what Lucretia can do anymore than: "Lucretia has superhuman strength, toughness and senses and that's that." There's no need to describe anything more than that.
However, later in the series plan, there will come villains that are doing things that have to be defeated in ways that don't exist in the real world. The nuts and bolts of how superpowers operate will start becoming necessary at that point.
Likewise, I have only given glimpses of Lucretia's psychological make up. Right now, you only need to realize that she is a irresponsible, promiscuous alcoholic with a few mental quirks and a near compulsion for stopping bad things from happening. There isn't a need to look much deeper than that.
However, I did receive complaints from a pre-reader that I needed to explain something of the history of the world to that point. That suggestion resulted in the scene with Lucretia harranguing the college students about their topic.
It was clear that I did need to explain something of what the broader world was like.
Despite the fact that I don't need to explain those things yet, for Bystander and Greenwater each, I already have pages on pages of material which currently is meant for my eyes and the eyes of my pre-readers only. I've got history timelines, language discussions, glossaries of terms, lists of people and organizations, metaphysical write-ups and a discussion on Lucretia herself.
I have almost enough material to write an entire book showcasing the world of Bystander. After some spoilers are revealed, I might just do that for an RPG sourcebook. Until then, it is unnecessary information.
Bystander
Greenwater Part One: Leaving Home
Greenwater Part 2: Setting the Board
