T.L. Gray's Blog, page 75

Author Appearances

February 2012
Book-Signing 
Neva Lomason Public Library
710 Rome Street
Carrollton, GA  30117
Friday, February 10, 2012 
6:30pm - 8:00pm

Book-Signing
Dog River Library
6100 Hwy 5
Douglasville, GA  30135
Saturday, February 25, 2012 
11:00am - 1:00pm


March 2012

Book-Signing
Horton's Books
410 Adamson Square
Carrollton, GA 30117
Saturday, March 24. 2012 
12:00pm - 2:00pm


May 2012

Book-Signing
Underground Books
102 Alabama Street
Carrollton, GA  30117
Saturday, May 5, 2012
12:00 pm - 2:00 pm

Don't Be Hatin'

One of the things I can't quite understand when it comes to authors is why there is sometimes jealousy and animosity between writers.  We're not in competition with one another.  There are plenty of books to go around.  Stories have been told long before we arrived, and will continue long after we're gone.  If anything, we should support one another.  

What benefit could there possibly be for me to know or associate with a failed writer?  I can't think of anything.  However, there are endless possibilities of knowing and associating with a successful one.  Not only out of the goodness of my heart should I encourage, inspire and support my fellow authors, but it's in MY best interest to do so.  I don't have to LOVE them, actually, I don't even have to LIKE them on a personal level, to support and wish them the best in their endeavors. 

Still, from time to time, I come across that beleaguered and jealous writer who not only wishes for my failure, but will go out of their way to help support it.  They'll spread slander, malice and pray to the gods of destruction to place every obstacle and roadblock in my way.  I feel sorry for them.  They've already lost, and are already defeated, regardless of their book sales.  This defeat may not reflect in their book sales (even a snake could sell a book) – but as a decent human being. 

I choose to separate myself from those who only have negative thoughts, actions and intentions. Instead, I choose to surround myself with dreamers, artists and people who desire to share their gifts and talents with the world.   I may, or may not, hit the New York Times Best-Seller list, but I'm already a success , because I've surrounded myself with successful people.

Till next time,
~T.L. Gray

Please Yourself

Have you ever tried to do something, yet everyone around you didn't understand your actions or motives? While many people express their support, their actions don't necessarily live up to their confession? What do you say in those circumstances? What do you do? One thing you can't do - is give up.
Sometimes I find myself pulled between two worlds. I love each side equally, that neither fully. Don't get me wrong, I'm not straddling the fence. I find the place I inhabit, is a place of my own choosing; not theirs. Let me try to explain this more plainly - I am a writer, a scribe, a mother, a wife, a sister, a daughter, a Christian, a deacon, a leader, a friend, a business partner, a marketer, a dreamer, and yet I must strive to find a balance between all of those positions. Often times some of the expectations of these positions oppose others, not that they have to. 
We are complex people, living in a complex world. Each of us is an individual with their own ideals, beliefs, and expectations. But I have learned over the past few years, I can't change or manipulate my actions to satisfy someone else's expectations. Not everybody is going to like my choices. Not everybody is going to support my decisions. Not everybody is going to think I'm making the right judgments for myself. But the bottom line is: these are my choices, decisions, and ideals. The only person I must please - is me.
I'd love to make everybody happy. But I'm not fool enough to believe I can. However there is one person I can strive every day to please – myself. Just as I have discovered truths about love, I'm learning the same thing applies to peace and happiness. I have to first be filled with peace and happiness, before I can share it with the world.  If I'm truly happy with myself, then I can be happy for you. If I can walk in peace, then I can offer peace. We can only share what is in the overflow. If we have nothing, we have nothing to give.
So today I encourage you, do what makes you happy.  But remember: though everything is permissible not everything is beneficial. Sometimes we deceive ourselves into thinking something or someone will make us happy, when happiness is truly a simple decision. It's not found in a gift, an object, another person, or a possession; it's a state of mind.
Till next time,T. L. Gray

Never Stop Learning

 I'm what you might call a self-learner.  While I love instruction, I get the best education by hand-on application.  I do read directions, but I like to 'use' the item, program or machine WHILE I read the instructions.  That way my hands learn at the same time as my brain.
This morning, I am learning to use my new program "Dragon". While things are slow going at the moment, with each practical use it gets a little easier.  With this program, the biggest thing I have to learn is how to speak properly.  I guess you could say the lesson would be that with practice comes perfection. My typing and writing skills are above average, but my speaking etiquette could use a lot of work.
The last couple of weeks I have been in editing mode. While I scanned the pages of my manuscript, I searched for every grammar, typo and punctuation error.  But that was only one step of the process. Today, I am focused on structure, formatting and font selection.  While I have grasped a general understanding of the word processor I use, I realize there is so much more that I need to learn. Today I am challenged with the subject of headers and footers. I know that the only way I am going to learn how to properly use these options are to play around with the program. I have to get that hands-on experience; just like using this Dragon program.
The bottom line of what I'm trying to say is - we never need to stop learning. If we ever get to the point that we think we know everything, we've learned nothing. There is always something new to discover, a new skill to inherit, a new understanding to be revealed. I know many people in this world want to jump to the conclusion, the solution, or the end to receive the fruits of their labor, but I find the true treasure is in the trials and tribulations of our journey - not the end. The pride that comes from a personal accomplishment is so much more rewarding than a gift. While we may struggle in our quest, the payoff is even greater.
Never stop learning. You never know what you'll discover tomorrow.
Till next time, ~T. L. Gray

Don't Give Up - Keep Running/Keep Standing

Giving up is the easiest thing in the world to do; it takes the least amount of energy and releases the largest amount of pressure.  However, while everything I do is permissible, not everything is for my own benefit.  While I am free to give up (I have the power to choose), doing so isn't always for my good - even if I'm wrong.

Standing fast, holding out, and refusing to move is hard, especially when it comes to standing still.  I might not think standing in one spot, refusing to budge and keeping my eyes focused straight ahead is easy (compared to digging, shoveling and barreling through), but I'm finding it's the hardest thing I've ever had to do.  I'm also discovering it takes a lot more faith to stand still than it does to move.  My mind is constantly bombarded with questions of, "What if I'm wrong?", "What if I'm making a mistake?", "What if I'm supposed to be doing something else?" and "Am I wasting my life and time?"   Yet, I can't move based on what I think and feel (the two major contributors that lead to confusion). 

My thoughts can be deceptive and my feelings can change with every shift in the wind.  The only way to make it across the finish line is to put aside thoughts that want to take me out of my lane and send me in the wrong direction, and push through the aches, pains and fatigue.  I must relegate my breathing, concentrate on the goal I want to achieve and push forward - even when I have to stand still. 

So, what if I'm wrong?  What if the path I've decided to take is the wrong path?  The only thing I can do is continue with the quest I'm currently on until I receive a clear directive to shift, but not based on shifting thoughts and feelings.  Perseverance means to push on in the midst of opposition.  Without opposition, there's no perseverance.  Without options there's no choice.  Without determination and a desire to win, there's no victory.  Without other runners, there's no competition. 

Press on.  Continue to stand, even if you don't think or feel like it.  The only way you're truly going to know if you're in the right race is to finish it.  And if you are wrong ... so what?  You've at least accomplished something and have a more clear idea of what race to run next.  And if you are right ... you've won!

Till next time,
~T.L. Gray 

Keezy's 10 Awesome Rules for Teenaged Dating Review

5.0 out of 5 stars Keezy's 10 Awesome Rules for Teenage Dating is a "10"!, January 16, 2012 By Laura L. Kirk - See all my reviews This review is from: Keezy's 10 Awesome Rules for Teenaged Dating! (Paperback) I read Keezy's 10 Awesome Rules for Teenage Dating to my mentally challenged, twenty-one-year old daughter. She absolutely loved it! She laughed and enjoyed all of Keezy's zany antics! It's hard to find a book these days that contains down to earth, moral advice written in a very stylist and contemporary voice. You love Keezy immediately, and you care about what she has to say. I had no reservations about reading this to my daughter since Keezy's advice was tastfully delivered. She covers a plethora of subjects important to today's teenager. No rocks left unturned, so to speak. I would recommend this to anyone with a teenage daughter! This book would be great for book clubs, church youth groups, or any venue where teenage girls congregate. Keezy's 10 Awesome Rules for Teenage Dating is a "10" all around!


Thank you, Laura! That was a wonderful review.

Till next time,
~T.L. Gray

P.s.  Happy Birthday, Meagan. 

Do You Believe in the Impossible?

Most of us are quick to reply with a resounding "absolutely" when asked if we believe that all things are possible, yet our words often don't match the truth of our confession.  I've even convinced myself that I fervently believe in the impossible... until I really think about it.  What I've discovered after careful evaluation is that I believe more in the idea of the impossible as it weighs against the improbable.

I believe in sowing and reaping -  that if you're a kind person you'll receive kindness, and if you're friendly you'll be surrounded by lots of friends.  But if you're selfish, mean and hateful you'll be surrounded by those of like kind. I believe if you're giving of yourself (gifts, money, possessions, inspiration, dreams, talents, time) to others in lack, you'll never be without.  But do I REALLY believe that?  I think I believe in the idea of the concept more than the actual execution.  My experiences in life doesn't 't fit securely into that little box. Don't get me wrong, I like the box.  I'd love to live inside that box and experience all that it has for me.  Don't misunderstand me - I believe the concept of sowing and reaping is the Truth - a natural law just as effective as the law of gravity; the precedence is clearly set and the evidence is clearly evident -  it's my belief that has wavered.  This also goes for my belief that with God nothing is impossible. 

The biggest hindrance I believe when it comes to the impossible is the boxes in which we place ourselves.  If you don't believe you live in a box, you've deceived yourself already.  It's in our human nature to create the ideas of what is right, wrong, truth, lie, fact or fiction.  We sort these out in our beliefs and place them into tightly wrapped boxes and organize them neatly on our life shelves.  This goes for all humanity, not just the religious.  When we are faced with the exception to the rules we've accepted, we falter and our foundations are shaken and some of our boxes lose their lids or our walls crumble.  So, what do we do... we build more boxes.  They may look different than the first ones, but they're still boxes.  Believing that EVERYTHING is possible is to live outside the box; out where it's uncomfortable, where it's improbable and where you'll come against those who are still inside.

Still don't believe you live inside a box?  Let's play a game called "What Would God Do?" Most of us just created the biggest box we've ever seen, based on our own beliefs and ideas.  We're pretty intimate on our knowledge of God and sure of how He would act - having read His exploits in the Good Book. 

Now ask yourselves these simple questions: 
Did the people in Noah's day believe God would flood the world?  He never had before, given no precedent and  surely He wouldn't kill the very species He created.  This was not a belief that fit in their little boxes, therefore they saw no need for Noah and his ark. Only Noah thought outside the box and built what had never been imagined to escape the improbable.Did Abraham's family believe God would have him leave everything he'd ever known to go to a place he'd never been?  Would God then ask Abraham to sacrifice his son, one born of a promise and a miracle during his old age? Again there was no precedence to believe such impossible things - but only Abraham believed outside the box - he believed in the miracle of birth and the hope of deliverance when all natural sense compiled of the boxes of logic told him different.  He moved; he climbed the mountain and he bound his son.Did the Israelite believe Moses when he told them God would deliver them from the bondage of slavery out of Egypt and provide for them?  Did they believe in the ten plagues, the parting of the Red Sea and the daily provision of Manna?  God had never moved like that before - again there was no precedence.  The Israelite didn't believe God either - they didn't believe the daily miracles they saw with their own eyes because it was all outside their boxes.  Their boxes caused them to wander in the wilderness for over 40  years.  Other than Caleb and Joshua - only their children and grandchildren entered the promised land because they refused to act on what they claimed to believe.Still believe in the impossible?  No matter what faith you believe or what religion you follow, even those who choose to follow none, the only things you truly believe are the things do; the things you act upon.  If you believed in the impossible, you would do the impossible.  That's the only way to know; that's the only evidence available.  Everything else is speculation and supposition - no matter how passionately you feel about it.

Perhaps next time when someone asks you if you believe that all things are possible, you'll step back and examine yourself and see how often you step out of your box and into the unknown and experience the impossible before you answer.  I hope your answer is still "absolutely".  

Milledgeville Misfit Book Signing

Characterization

When I'm writing a character in one of my novels, I try not to form them into the idea of who I think they should be.  While I may have some idea, their true personalities emerge as I get to know them. If I try to force my idea, eventually the true personality will conflict and the plot will form holes. This is a common mistake I see among many writers, myself included.
When I'm writing a new story - I try to brainstorm as much as possible of what I envision for the plot, but I try to keep the main ideas and characterizations in various shades of gray. If I color the story or characters in too much I end up with a huge brown mess.  We all know what a stinky situation that would be.
When I'm reading a story - the main factor that keeps me glued to the page is a simple fact of whether or not I actually care for the characters.  If by the second or third paragraph I have not already been introduced to a character and can sympathize, feel empathy or outright dislike, most likely I will put the book down and never pick it up again.  While there are some great tomes that are action oriented, that's not my preference. 
I love Harry Potter because I love Harry Potter and I hate Lord Voldemort. I get bored with The Lord of the Rings because I do not care about a ring or the salvation of a bunch of people I know nothing about.  I love Eragon because Paolini allowed me the privilege of being right there beside Eragon as he transformed from a simple farm boy to a fearless dragon-rider. I won't even mention what Cinda Chima Williams did for the the Demon King with Han, or my how I hoped passionately for Elizabeth Bennett to capture Austen's Mr. Darcy, or hopelessly fell in love with Dumas' Edmond Dantes.  These stories are great because their characters are great.
Don't get me wrong, I love action. But what good is a great battle without a passionate reason?  Just to win is not enough. Sacrifice without heart-felt purpose is meaningless.
As you think about your story this morning, think about the heart of your characters. What do they feel? What do they fear? What are their hopes, their dreams, and their passions?  What makes them unique?  What drives them? What angers them, makes them lose control, and makes them compromise their values? These are the aspects that draw me into a story.
Till next time,~T. L. Gray

Deadlines & Excellence

There are some positive and negatives to everything in this world, including deadlines.  Having a deadline gives me a clear and precise expectation and a time-frame to work within to meet them, while struggling to also maintain a spirit of excellence in my work. 

Deadlines and expectations also gives Murphy the same thing.  He tends to work overtime to do, send and lend a hand to anything he can think to knock me off course, tempting me to rush and give only partial effort. I must persevere, push forward, and not allow anything to give me to pause or an opportunity to present less than my best.

Today I sit here with a clear deadline and directive from my publisher to complete the latest edits for Milledgeville Misfit.  Half my face is smiling; the other half shares a grimace, yet on I strive for excellence.    I'm reminded of a proverb: "Do you see a man who excels in his work? He will stand before kings; he will not stand before unknown men."  Again, I have such great expectations.

Till next time,
~T.L. Gray