Joseph Mallozzi's Blog, page 78
September 29, 2023
September 29, 2023: This and That!
I’m thinking about doing a twitter (X) Spaces next Saturday (afternoon?) where I’ll field question about Stargate, Dark Matter, screenwriting, and pugs. Have never used it before, have no idea how it works – so that should make it all the more fun. Will keep you updated!
Things I Hate:
Truffle oil
Liquid smoke
Meetings
Result writing
Foodie influencers who "cheers" with their food
Politicians
People who fawn over politicians on twitter
People who use "addicting" over "addictive"
Currants or raisins in my chocolate
The latest thing
— Joseph Mallozzi
(@BaronDestructo) September 28, 2023
I hear they're also working on a Stranger Things reboot. https://t.co/OhMKp0LTlZ
— Joseph Mallozzi
We’ve locked down NYC, more or less. Here’s hoping the flooding abates before our arrival. Shortly after our return, we’ll be traveling to L.A. for a couple of days to visit Pug Nation of Los Angeles. The plan was to wait for the new year to adopt a new (old) pug, but I hate the thought of that future adoptee (or two) languishing those extra few months. No new addition to the family will ever replace Suji, but here’s hoping that opening our home will be a fitting tribute to our dearly departed girl, and offer a wonderful second life to some needy pug. Or juggle.
The post September 29, 2023: This and That! appeared first on Joseph Mallozzi's Weblog.
September 28, 2023
September 28, 2023: The Crime Binge continues!
Dear Child (2023)
A mysterious woman’s escape from her harrowing captivity points investigators toward the dark truth behind an unsolved disappearance 13 years earlier.
My thoughts: Sets up an intriguing premise but fails in its execution. This one demands too much of a suspension of disbelief for this viewer.
2.5/5
Lupin (2021 – ) Season 1
Inspired by the adventures of Arsène Lupin, gentleman thief Assane Diop sets out to avenge his father for an injustice inflicted by a wealthy family.
My thoughts: Sure it’s fun, but as another reviewer has effectively pointed out, it’s not that Lupin is so brilliant as it is everyone else around him is so dumb. And that makes for less than satisfying viewing.
3.5/5
Guilt (2019-2023)
Second season Really enjoyed season 1, but season 2 was not for me. Disgraced lawyer Max McCall is released from prison into a world where nothing is what it seems and everyone has a hidden agenda.
My thoughts: Lacks the elegant simplicity of its first season. Too convoluted.
3/5
Mr. Inbetween (2018-2021) Season 2
Ray Shoesmith is a father, ex-husband, boyfriend, brother and best friend, tough roles to juggle in the modern age. Especially when you’re also a criminal for hire.
My thoughts: I had some issues with the season 1 finale, but season 2 is fantastic, darkly humorous and poignant.
4.5/5
The Devil’s Hour (2022)
A woman who wakes up every night at exactly 3.33AM, in the middle of the so-called devil’s hour between 3AM and 4AM.
My thoughts: Great set-up and an ultimately satisfying conclusion, but the road in-between is long and ponderous.
3/5
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September 27, 2023
September 27, 2023: Amazing Covers!
A few that caught my eye this week…
Avengers #5 – cover art by Alex Ross
The Invincible Iron Man #10 – cover art by Bob Layton
Batman: The Brace And the Bold #5 – cover art by Ben Oliver
Power Girl #1 – cover art by Gary Frank
The Flash #1 – cover art by Mike Deodato Jr.
Red Sonja #3 – cover art by Joshua Middleton
Red Sonja #3 – cover art by Lucio Parrillo
Alice Never After #3 – cover art by Justine Florentino
Seven Years in Darkness #4 – cover art by Joseph Schmalke
So, which were YOUR favorites?
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September 26, 2023
The Dreaded Script Notes!
In a notes session, “starting with the positives” is the animal wrangling equivalent of approaching slowly and speaking in a calm, soothing voice. It’s designed to relax the intended victim, lull them into a false sense of security.
Then, the second they let their guard down, they’re ensnared, bagged, and shipped off to some zoo where they’ll spend the rest of their lives waiting for the man with the yellow hat to bring more bananas and wondering how it all went wrong. Or working on a script rewrite.
Like most defenseless animals, writers are easily spooked and one whiff of danger is enough to send them scurrying for the safety of the high branches, or the bathroom, so that positive opening is de rigueur. “Hey, the script was a lot of fun. I just have a few thoughts”, “A terrific first effort! Great dialogue. Now, if you could just make a few adjustments…” Or “Nicely formatted. Your grammar is beyond reproach. As for the rest of it – well, you may want to cancel that weekend trip.”.
Starting with the positives can only mean one of two things: 1) They generally liked the script or 2) They generally hated it. Those initial positives tell you nothing. It’s the negatives that will give you a real sense of what they really thought of your script.
For instance, if their notes are few and/or capable of being easily incorporated into the next draft, then chances are they generally liked the script. If, on the other hand, your notes session…
a) at any time finds you raising your voice in defense to the point where you sound like classic SNL’s Mr. Bill…
b) runs roughly as long as it took you to write the script in the first place, and/or….
c) includes the phrase “What were you thinking?”, then chances are they didn’t love the script and you’re going to have your work cut out for you.
My advice for taking notes is to not lose your shit. Remain calm. And polite. Be receptive to their input. Ask for clarification if need be. But do NOT commit to anything!
Then ask them to forward you their notes so that you can review and obsess over them in private. Take the time to thoughtfully consider their input, come up with a game plan, and then respond with what I like to call Notes on Notes, again, requesting clarity when necessary, offering suggestions for how to best address their concerns, offering reasoned pushback on some points, and perhaps inquiring if they were joking or high when they gave THAT particular note.
Occasionally, you will come across a note so alarming, so batshit crazy or narratively destructive that it may reduce you to tears or trigger an expletive-laden outburst that will have your neighbors steering their children indoors.
In those instances, I urge you to look for “the spirit of the note”. What is their issue with the script that prompted this wild suggestion? Identify it and find a way to address it that won’t require you to disassemble the current draft.
Finally, remind yourself that notes are delivered out of a desire to make your script even better. And, occasionally, that will only happen if the end of your second act becomes the end of your tease.
The post The Dreaded Script Notes! appeared first on Joseph Mallozzi's Weblog.
September 25, 2023
September 25, 2023: Moving Forward!
Again, thanks to everyone who left a message about Suji. For a little girl, she had such a big, demanding personality that every facet of my daily routine was impacted by her presence – and now by her absence. Another dog will never replace Suji but seeing all those seniors and special needs pugs languishing and in need of a good home makes me believe we’ll be adopting sooner than later. Perhaps much sooner.
With the seeming resolution to the WGA strike, I’m hoping the various projects I have on the go start seeing traction. There is apparent interest on the part of a South Korean production company for my SciFi-Kpop series (Seoul!), while two potential homes have expressed interest in my globe-trotting (Greece!) action adventure series (We’ll be looking to chat with an actor we’re hoping to attach to the project maybe next week). And, finally, my cozy mystery pilot (U.K.!) will go out. The producer how optioned it is very excited – and I, in turn, am very excited at the prospect of doing a very different show. Meanwhile, looks like financing for that horror movie is looking very good (Bulgaria!). Hope to have a cash-flow schedule by next week. Tomorrow, we’re on a zoom with a possible Music Supervisor and, then week after, we should be talking to an entertainment lawyer about setting up our own prod. co. Also have a couple of zooms this week regarding some outside projects, pilots/shows in need of some development (and a showrunner) before gong out to the market, one with a very cool horror angle, the other that would shoot in Portugal. I feel like there are one or two other projects I’m forgetting, but I’m sure they’ll come to me. After I hit PUBLISH on this entry.
Looking forward to our short NYC get-away. We’ve booked a couple of tables, noted maybe too many dessert stops, but THIS is the one Akemi is most looking forward to –
For Akemi, it’s all about the fish and carbs.
Todays’ Yes/No…
Pumpkin Shaved Ice? Yes/No pic.twitter.com/j5qhpxsdYI
— Joseph Mallozzi
The post September 25, 2023: Moving Forward! appeared first on Joseph Mallozzi's Weblog.
September 24, 2023
September 24, 2023: A Final Suji Sunday!
Our last few days with Suji…
The post September 24, 2023: A Final Suji Sunday! appeared first on Joseph Mallozzi's Weblog.
September 23, 2023
September 23, 2023: Unusual Deaths!
#UnusualDeaths
Parasites found in the feces of Assassins Bugs cause a condition known as Chagas Disease that, if left untreated, can lead to heart, digestive issues, and death. Assassin Bugs claim the lives of 10 000 people a year. pic.twitter.com/B2uDbQFfB7
— Joseph Mallozzi
#UnusualDeaths
Autoerotic Asphyxiation claims the lives of 600 people a year – although that number could be considerably higher given the likelihood that surviving loved ones may be reluctant to reveal the true cause of death. pic.twitter.com/jcZ5O1ssJ2
— Joseph Mallozzi
#UnusualDeaths
40 people a year are killed in shark attacks making YOUR odds of being killed by a shark roughly 300,000,000/1. pic.twitter.com/pFS1UAt9aV
— Joseph Mallozzi
#UnusualDeaths
Most cowboys didn't carry six-guns because they were gunslingers. They carried them in the event their boot got stuck in their stirrup and they had to shoot their horse to avoid being dragged to death. pic.twitter.com/JnR5LF0y7P
— Joseph Mallozzi
#UnusualDeaths
2500 left-handed people a year die using products designed for right-handed people. They also die, on average, three days earlier than right-handed people. pic.twitter.com/a0hzDmXSYk
— Joseph Mallozzi
#UnusualDeaths
You have a 1 in 685,000 chance of drowning in your bathtub.
Stick to showers! pic.twitter.com/OkX1atDERz
— Joseph Mallozzi
#UnusualDeaths
The holiday shopping event known as Black Friday has seen 117 injuries and 12 deaths over its pushy, crowded, stampedey history. pic.twitter.com/nDky1zVpWr
— Joseph Mallozzi
Today’s Yes/No…
Stuffed Roast Potatoes in a Sea of Melty Cheese? Yes/No https://t.co/YAz6HMiSy5
— Joseph Mallozzi
The post September 23, 2023: Unusual Deaths! appeared first on Joseph Mallozzi's Weblog.
September 22, 2023
September 22, 2023: Getting Away!
The place has bee all too quiet the past few days. I actually choked up eating roast chicken. We need to get away for a while.
So we’ve booked our first Japan trip in five years for December and are looking to do a little more vacationing. I put out a twitter poll yesterday –
Thinking of getting away for a week.
Where should we go?
— Joseph Mallozzi
New Orleans runs away with it. Coincidentally, Akemi cast her vote for the Big Easy as well, eager to sample the beignets at Cafe Du Monde. How many days do you think would be good? I’m guessing somewhere between 3-5. We either go in November OR early next year as we have also booked a two night trip to NYC. We’ll be staying in Midtown. Hit me with your Big Apple restaurant recommendations! Also any other vacation destinations we should be considering. Spain and Portugal are also top of the list.
At some point, we’d really like to adopt another dog or two, but it’ll be tough to do amidst all the travel, especially if we ended up adopting a special needs senior (or two) which is more than likely.
Today’s Yes/No…
Matcha Mocchiri Balls? Yes/No
Matcha mocchiri balls appear at Starbucks in Japan for a limited time https://t.co/qVDqYUy54F via @RocketNews24En
— Joseph Mallozzi
Very much missing my girl
The post September 22, 2023: Getting Away! appeared first on Joseph Mallozzi's Weblog.
September 21, 2023
September 21, 2023: Amazing Covers!
A few that caught my eye this week…
Star Wars: Dark Droids – D-Squad #1 – cove art by Tom Reilly
Catwoman #57 – cover art by Joshua “Sway” Swaby
Green Lantern: War Journal #1 – cover art by Taj Tenfold
Green Lantern: War Journal #1 – cover art by Dave Wilkins
Superman #6 – cover art by Tiago Da Silva
The Vigil #5 – cover art by Sumit Kumar
Titans #3 – cover art by Mike Deodato Jr.
Harley Quinn: Black, White & Redder #3 – cover art by Cliff Chiang
Victory #4 – cover art by Dave Johnson
Dune: House of Harkonnen #9 – cover art by Raymond Swanland
So, which were YOUR favorites?
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September 20, 2023
September 20, 2023: Suji
Many question the wisdom of adopting a senior dog given the limited time you have with them.
In Suji’s case, we were blessed to have her for almost seven years.
She came to us via the Pacific Pug Rescue when she was almost twelve, wheelchair-bound, cantankerous and, surprisingly, not very affectionate for a pug. She didn’t mind Akemi, didn’t like other dogs, and certainly didn’t like me who she tried her best to avoid those first couple of days. Akemi wanted to give her a new name to symbolize her fresh start while I insisted that it was madness to rename a dog heading into their twelfth year of life, so we compromised. And Suzy became Suji (short for Sujiko, Japanese for salmon roe).
And so, Sujiko started her new life with us. Due to her condition, her back legs didn’t work so well so she relied on a wheelchair. But she was a determined girl so we decided to test her, exercising her regularly, eventually walking her with a towel to help support her hindquarters – first a few steps, then the length of a street, eventually an entire block. We brought her to therapy (hydro, laser, massage), and, slowly but surely, she regained the use of her back legs. She started walking again. A little wobbly, but she still walked – and we were able to put her wheelchair in storage.
Also due to her condition, she wasn’t able to pee on her own so we learned to express her bladder, first Akemi crouching down with her as the vet videos taught, later me with a standing off-the-hip motion that would worked far better. She was also an oblivious pooper, dropping the occasional nugget until I learned to help her in that respect as well, earning myself the nickname Poop Whisperer.
Suji settled in quickly and grew to tolerate the other dogs in the house, fellow pug Bubba and frenchie Lulu. She actually formed a bit of a bond with laid-back Lulu and, after Lulu’s sudden passing, spent days wandering the apartment looking for her.
Unlike most dogs, Suji didn’t mind being dressed up and she seemed to love the camera, so Akemi had no trouble starting a dedicated instagram page for her, a page that, at last check, had over 52k followers, over 10k more followers than I do despite my 400 hours of produced television including Stargate and Dark Matter.
Like a lot of celebrities, Suji would occasionally get recognized when she was out in public – on the street, in the park, once by a retail worker at Lululemon in Vancouver who rushed out of the store to meet her. And, like a lot of celebrities, Suji was indifferent, grudgingly posing for pictures or suffering unsolicited pats.
Eventually, she lost the use of her legs again but this time, no amount of therapy would help her regain mobility and she was back in her old wheelchair for a time. But eventually the neurological condition she suffered from made even that impossible so we switched to a doggy stroller and she would enjoy the outings, the feel of the rolling wheels underneath her, the sun on her face, being inaccessible to other dogs.
In her later years, Suji seemed to give in to her natural pugly instincts and actually enjoyed being cuddled, usually on Akemi’s lap or when I would carry her in my arms like a baby. That was when she was the most comfortable. And, really, so long as we were near, she was fine. Of course as she got older and her hearing went and her eyesight failed, “near”, became increasingly Suji subjective. She preferred it when I sat on the couch beside her and worked or if she could rest her chin on my reassuring foot while I was at my stand-up desk. The last time we went away (to Japan), she was still mobile and had Lulu to keep her company, so she stayed with a friend. When we picked her up following our two week trip, she absolutely let us have it, barking her outrage in the backseat of the car the entire drive home. But since Lulu’s passing, and Suji’s high-maintenance needs, we shelved our travel plans indefinitely.
Suji turned 18 this past May and, all things considered, we thought she was doing pretty well for a girl her age and were hopeful she’d hit 19 at least. But her conditioned worsened. The vets suspect her neurological condition was slowly working its way up her body, robbing her of the ability to walk, then making the most mundane of things difficult – holding her head up, chewing and swallowing, breathing. We switched to softer food, smaller bites, and then hand-feeding. We tried propping her up so she’d have an easier time of it. Despite our best efforts, she struggled, occasionally choking. I had to perform the doggy Heimlich on her on three separate occasions over the past month.
Ultimately, breathing became an issue so we would lie her with her chest and head propped up, or we would carry her around, again like a baby, to keep her airway clear. But, in the end, even those measures were fleeting and she would suffer scary respiratory attacks where her tongue would turn purple. So we made the decision. The plan was to take her out for burgers and coconut ice cream (to accompany the seasoned chicken Akemi had been making for her, her absolute favorite) and arrange a visit for an in-home euthanasia today. But late yesterday afternoon, she took a turn for the worse – gasping for breath, tongue purpling – so we called our vet and brought her in.
Our vet, and the team at then Queen West Animal Clinic (connected to the Four Paws Rehab center we would take Suji to for her hydro and laser therapy) were amazing and incredibly reassuring. I held Suji in my lap as she drifted off to sleep for the last time.
My biggest regret is that she never got that coconut ice cream.
Now, the house feels quiet and empty. Unusually so. For the first time in almost 25 years, I’m without a dog. And I don’t like it.
For now, Akemi and I will mourn our girl and focus on other things, maybe finally take that long overdue trip back to Japan.
And when we come back, we’ll look into adopting another dog or two, preferably seniors. Because in spite of the limited time you have with them, what may feel like few years to you is a second lifetime to them, one filled with hope and love and fun and affection and sleeping on a huge bed and getting to paint with little sponges on their paws and eating barbecue duck from T&T.
I’ll miss my girl.
I leave you with a few of my favorite Suji videos…
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