Joseph Mallozzi's Blog, page 246

Whoopsy! Almost slipped my mind!

Whew!  That was close!  I was sitting in bed tonight, watching food-themed youtube videos as we’re wont to do, when I suddenly realized: “Holy crap!  I haven’t blogged yet!”

To the average blogger this would be no big deal.  But for me – well, I’ve been blogging daily for over twelve years and I just know that if I ever missed a day, blog regulars would be beside themselves with worry.

To be honest, I’m amazed it’s never happened before but I suppose blogging is now second nature to me, as natural a part of my daily routine as brushing my teeth or plotting revenge.

Many of you have discovered this blog over the years, no doubt inadvertently stumbling upon it in your searches for Stargate, pugs, or squash-stuffed agnolotti photos while others happened by more recently.  I often think back to some of those early regulars who have disappeared over time and wonder what happened to them.  Like Bugguy, the microbiologist who never missed an opportunity lecture me about the risky food I consumed, Emily my first virtual dinner date, or PG15 who won the flocking.  Early followers like Carolina and ThornyRose, SueS and snowcrush, Stillhere and scarym, ShipperAhoy and Tokiya2, GateGipsy and alyburns, FlatLandDan, Ugly Pig, Miho, Nolamom, kiwigator and Sun Dancer to name but a few.  And, of course, good ole Anonymous.  Where’d they go?

Anyway, put your minds at ease.  Here’s one more entry for the personal record books.  Along with a few updates:

Tomorrow, Ivon, RT, Robbie and I head to the production offices where I will set up (ie. bring in a bottle of whiskey if I remember), talk to Production Designer Ian Brock about the plans for those standing sets, and finally pull the trigger on the crew.  Also, maybe, Burgers Priest for lunch.  Just like old times!

Also, got word of a second script order for my Untitled Awesome Project!  The broadcaster and production company both seem very excited about it and the magic 8-Ball says “Outlook good”, but I’m going to temper expectations.  Even though the series overview and pilot  are, easily, the most cuckoo-bananas things I’ve ever written and I’ll be absolutely heartbroken if we don’t make a t.v. show you’ll all instantly fall in love with, I’m not going to get ahead of myself.

And, to put the exclamation point on the day, just heard back on pitches for two comic book projects, both sci-fi and both equally well-received.  Follow-up call next week to discuss.

Hey, blog-readers.  Roll call!  When did you start hanging out and what brought you here?

January 30, 2019: Week’s Best Comic Book Covers!

This week was, without a doubt, this week offered the greatest selection of comic book covers since I started doing this.  To be honest, this list could have been twice as long but I elected to limit myself to…

Captain America #7 (cover art by Alex Ross)

Fantastic Four #6 (cover art by Esad Ribic)

Justice League Odyssey #5 (cover art by Stjepan Sejic)

Mysteries of Love in Space #1 (cover art by Joelle Jones, Alex Sinclair)

Star Wars: Doctor Aphra #28 (cover art by Ashley Witter)

The Adventures of Captain Cosmic #2 (cover art by Andy W. Clift)

Weapon X vol. 5 (cover art by Rahzzah)

And you?

Those Extra-Curricular Activities I Hated Growing Up!

CUB SCOUTS

The AAA farm team version of the Boy Scouts, our weekly meetings were overseen by a bunch of guys who were clearly fans of old war movies and presided over us with all the warmth of George G. Scott’s Patton.  There was a ritual we had to perform which would involve us reciting some non-sensical pledge of allegiance to Akela, the head wolf.   My sister’s insider info on the female equivalent of the cub scouts, the brownies, revealed a similarly eerie ritual that saw them swear fealty to their head wolf equivalent – Brown Owl.  Aside from this, I just remember playing a lot of dodgeball.

SWIMMING LESSONS

Whereas most kids looked forward to the weekend, I despite Saturdays because it meant waking up early to attend swimming lessons.  The echoing shouts and screams of the other kids.  The impossibility of doing the back crawl without running headlong into the opposing wall or a swimmer headed in the opposite direction.  The sheer ridiculousness of the butterfly, an aquatic stroke so awkward and ineffective that I always considered it the musical equivalent of learning to play the flugelhorn.

JUDO

I learned three things:  1. How to flip someone provided they are in the exact perfect position (left foot back, right foot forward, left hand gripping my belt, and right hand firmly gripping my shoulder, and leaning forward ever so slightly).  2. How to count to ten in Japanese.  3. How to dye a white belt yellow.

PIANO LESSONS

Apparently, the fact that my piano teacher marveled over what she termed my “piano fingers” was enough to convince my parents I was a childhood prodigy, despite my actual lack of anything beyond middling talent.  I took lessons for three years before finally mustering up the courage to tell my mother I didn’t want to do it anymore.  She responded as most any parent would: bursting into tears, tearing my piano workbook in half and then, a couple of days later, buying me a new workbook and suggesting we forget that last conversation.

SUMMER CAMP

I went on the recommendation of my cousins, regular attendees, but it was only on my first day that I realized it was a Christian camp complete with bible study, parable-themed plays, and nightly bonfires that customarily culminated in campers baring their fears, anxieties, or minor discretions and then receiving words of encouragement or absolution from the teen counselors.  My sole admission was my honest regret at having chosen Christian bible camp over hanging by the pool all summer.  My counselor could offer no solace.

January 28, 2019: On the Project Front…

Man, pitching is tough.  Even when you know your take inside out and are feeling great about it going in, there’s no telling how you did going out.  Especially after protracted pockets of silence after the humorous bits.  Still, 45 minutes of awesome storytelling later, you try to put it out of your mind and refocus on other projects.

For what it’s worth though, this would be a dream project.  The cross-genre subject matter combines two of the things I love most and would team me with someone I’ve enjoyed working with in the past who be a total blast to work with again.  This projects ticks all the boxes.  So, of course, as always, it’s wait and see.

Meanwhile, tomorrow is the kick-off call for the (formerly) Untitled Awesome Project.  I’ve already started working on a the detailed outline for the pilot, occasionally pitching Akemi and Ivon the various sequences I’ve envision.  I’ve yet to write the script yet they already have their favorite character.  The same one!  This show is going to be a joy to work on if it goes.  It’ll be like writing/producing the funniest installments of Stargate (Window of Opportunity, Wormhole X-Treme, 200) and Dark Matter (All The Time In The World, Isn’t That A Paradox?) EVERY episode.

Also meanwhile, official prep begins on this other series.  Former Dark Matter Production Designer Ian Brock will be doing the honors, designing our unique far future city exteriors and interiors, overseeing construction as it gets underway tomorrow.  9 of the first season’s 10 scripts are already in play.  And also this week, we pull the trigger on our department heads and get the ball rolling on casting.  The latter will be especially challenging as we have 10 series regulars to nail down before the start of principal photography in late March.

I already feel the need for a Tokyo getaway…

January 27, 2019: Suji Sunday!

Super chill.

Toasty warm.

From therapy dog, to in-therapy dog…

Hard to believe that when we first got her, Suji needed a wheelchair to get around.  Now, even though she and Lulu get a lift to the park, she’s a dedicated walker.  And if we’re ever late for her morning or evening walks, she let us know it!

Inspired by Tidying Up with Marie Kondo, Lulu and I look to clean up her toy box…

January 26, 2019: All the Pretty Plates!

Dinner last night at Sara Restaurant (98 Portland Street, Toronto)

Hamachi bites, yellowtail sashimi, scallop & crab dumplings, Shanghai pork dumplings, chicken wing dumplings, snap pea slaw, black cod, bincho broccoli, momo yakitori, party sandwich, PB&J.

The restaurant is in a refurnished two-level Victorian home.  Akemi loves the  interior design by Odami Design so much that she instantly expressed a desire to move in.

Check out out while you’re in town.

 

The answers to our horror visual quiz and TWO winners!

Congratulations to Vasilj Milosevic and Willie Stevens who correctly identified all 25 horror movies from the featured gifs.  Here are your answers:

1 = The Shining

Lots of great, hair-raising moments in this one, but the twins are my favorite.  A seminal moment in movie history, so I’d say this was an easy one.

2 = The Ring/Ringu

I practically jumped out of my skin the first time I witnessed Sadako crawl out of a t.v. screen.  Surprisingly, this is one of those rare instances where the remake is as good as the original.

3 = Don’t Look Now

This one scared the beejeebers out of me when I was a kid watching this movie at home alone on a night when my parents were out.  Donald Pleasance running around Venice, desperate to track down the ghost of his recently deceased daughter.  Whatta surprise!

4 = Blair Witch Project

In all fairness, reports of moviegoers vomiting during screenings had more to do with the shaky cam than the actual scares.  Still, this film boasts easily the most terrifying capture in horror found footage history.

5 = Ju-On/The Grudge

I was actually torn between the woman under the sheets and the anxious little ghost boy at the foot of the bed but elected to go with the former because, as we all know, the safest place at night IS under the covers.  Usually.

6 = Carrie

This one was a little harder but I think pretty recognizable by those who’ve sat through this memorable scare.  I remember hearing that this entire graveside sequence was actually shot  backwards.

7 =Kairo

This one is more of a thinking person’s horror film, an exploration of philosophical terror, with some truly eerie images – like this limping ghost woman.  This is one of those more common instances where the North American remake is far worse than the original.

8 = The Exorcist

I could have gone with the by now classic 180 degree head turn but elected to go with the notable backwards crawl.

9 = Event Horizon

I know a lot of people who really hated this movie, but I think it’s the perfect marriage of sci-fi and horror.

10 = Audition

Apparently when this movie screened at a New York festival, audience members actually got up and left during the film’s infamous “ballerina with a wire saw” scene.  As alarming as that scene was, however, THIS was the shot that made me jump – and offered the first hint at the horrible things to come.

11 = REC/Quarantine

Never watched the North American remake but the Spanish original was all sorts of terrifying – especially this shot.

12 = It Follows

Loved this weird little movie – up until the swimming pool scene.  But up until then, it offered up some truly great scares…like this one.

13 = Dark Water

This was a tough one to identify but the movie ranks as one of my very favorite J-Horrors.  The missing child, the growing water spot on the ceiling, the hair in the tap water.  And that final elevator realization – if my daughter’s out there in the hall, then who is behind me in the elevator?

14 = The Descent

Just the very idea of spelunking fills me with dread – and obviously with good reason as this film will attest.

15 = Phantasm

So, admittedly, it hasn’t aged well but as a 12 year old kid, this movie was pretty damn scare – especially this surprising reclamation by The Tall Man.

16 = Salem’s Lot

Not a theatrical release but a television adaptation that offered some surprisingly effective scares.  Like – Hey, Ralphie’s back!

17 = El Orfanato/The Orphanage

Next to clowns, there’s nothing scarier than kids.  And this movie proves as much.

18 = The Babadook

This movie offered up two theoretical horrors: a ghastly children’s book character come to life, and the prospect of having to raise a kid as annoying as this one.

19 = Invasion Of The Body Snatchers

I remember seeing this movie as a kid and being traumatized by the shot of the dog with the human face.  In retrospect, this movie’s closing shot was the far more effective scare.

20 = Carnival Of Souls

Another tough one to identify, but it’s a true classic.  The fact that it’s in black and white just makes the visuals all the more frightening.

21 = Sperloos/The Vanishing

Didn’t see the remake which I heard had a ridiculous happy ending, but the original became a classic because of its decidedly Unhappy ending.

22 = Misery

One of my very favorite horror movies; certainly my favorite Stephen King adaptation.

23 = Jacob’s Ladder

Another classic.  That hospital sequence still gives me nightmares.

24 = Prince of Darkness

Probably the most difficult of all the gifs to identify.  Kudos to those of you who recognized this macabre supernatural film featuring the late Donald Pleasance.

25 = The Visit

I was pleasantly surprised by how much I liked this movie – despite that precocious kid I was really hoping would meet a horrible end.

Scariest Horror Movie Moments!

These are mine.  Identify all 25 movies for a chance to win…something!

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January 23, 2019: Week’s Best Comic Book Covers!

These were my favorites!

Cover #5 (cover art by David Mack)

Daredevil: Back in Black vol, 8: Death of Daredevil (cover art by Phil Noto)

Extermination (cover art by Mark Brooks)

Guardians of the Galaxy #1 (cover art by David Marquez)

Immortal Hulk #12 (cover art by Alex Ross)

Monstress #19 (cover art by Sana Takeda)

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles #90 (cover art by Michael Dialynas)

Which were your favorites?

January 22, 2019: The latest online musings and breaking news!

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Guys, please!  This is important!

Ooookay.  Major script rewrites on deck.  No more than 9 or 10.  See you in June!