Joseph Mallozzi's Blog, page 120

July 6, 2022: Amazing Covers!

A few that caught my eye this week…

Starhenge: Dragon & Boar #1 – cover art by Mike Perkins

DIE!Namite Never Dies! #5 – cover art by Lucio Parrillo

DIE!Namite Never Dies! #5 – cover art by Arthur Suydam

Project Superpowers: Fractured States #4 – cover art by Rus Wooton

Black Panther #7 – cover art by Alex Ross

Carnage #4 – cover art by Kendrick Lim

Batman #125 – cover art by Gabriele Dell’otto

Batman ’89 – cover art by Joe Quinones

Dark Crisis #2 – cover art by Juliet Nneka

Nubia: Queen of the Amazons #2 – cover art by Taurin Clarke

Poison Ivy #2 – cover art by Jessica Fong

Suicide Squad: Blade #3 – cover art by Aaron Campbell

Promethee: 13:13 #1 – cover art by Jock

Absolution #1 – cover art by Mike Deodato Jr.

So, which were YOUR favorites?

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July 5, 2022: News of Note!

Cool –

Gauntlet of “Lion” armor of Henry II, king of France, 1550. pic.twitter.com/7yQ12pcDV5

— History Defined (@historydefined) July 4, 2022

Spooky –

Couple days ago at Leader Sk. Scary pic.twitter.com/INuhjFe8PM

— Joseph Wipf (@josephmwipf) July 4, 2022

Leaked photo from the set of Paddington 3 –

The Birdman of Athosia –

Today’s Yes/No.  Aint nothing remotely turkey about this.

Need me one of these….

These antique safes have very interesting systems.

Source @IntEngineering pic.twitter.com/KiSeDiO87K

— Universal Curiosity (@UniverCurious) June 23, 2022

Hot Cheeto turkey leg? Yes/No https://t.co/5lKDauoI8s

— Joseph Mallozzi (@BaronDestructo) July 5, 2022

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July 4, 2022: The Horror Marathon continues!

The Horror Marathon continues!

Cold Prey (2016)

5 young Norwegians head up to the mountains to snowboard. After one is injured, they decide to spend the night in an abandoned hotel. They are not alone.

Thoughts: A cut above the usual slasher flick.

3.5/5

Oculus (2013)

Kaylie suspects an antique mirror is behind the tragic death of her parents. And its seemingly harmless reflections contain a malevolent, supernatural force that infects the mind of anyone who gazes into it.

Thoughts: Keeps you guessing as to what is real and what isn’t.  My sole issue is that if you offer no effective means of discerning between the two, it begins to feel more like a narrative parlor trick.  All the same, a solid movie.

4/5

Host (2020)

Six friends accidentally invite the attention of a demonic presence during an online séance and begin noticing strange occurrences in their homes.

Thoughts: Went in with low expectations but came away pleasantly surprised. A few good scares, but suffers from problematic horror movie character logic.

3.5/5

Today’s Yes/No…

Teriyaki Donut Burgers? Yes/No
Japanese convenience store teriyaki donut hamburgers are definitely weird, but are they good? https://t.co/a33zKLqAzI via @RocketNews24En

— Joseph Mallozzi (@BaronDestructo) July 4, 2022

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July 3, 2022: Suji Sunday!

Bleh!

Brazen babushka.

Which way?

Hmmmm?

Action-ready!

The koala-pug in her natural habitat.

Dad honing in on the spotlight action.

Suji feeeling chatty…

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by YozoI'm Sujiすじ子 (@newoldpugsuji)

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July 2, 2022: My Saturday!

Quiet day today.  As usual, we got up early and hit the Saturday morning farmer’s market.  Akemi was on the lookout for her new favorite vegetable, lettage, a cross between lettuce and cabbage that makes for the most delicious cole slaw – but, sadly, they were out this week.  Instead, we picked up asparagus (crispy roasted tips for me; boiled stalks with mayo for her), garlic scapes, carrots (even though Akemi claims Canadian carrots taste soapy), some celery, a whole chicken (Akemi roasted for lunch), and some ox-tail (I seared, then put in the crock pot with some soy, sesame oil, Worcestershire, garlic scapes, sriracha, brown sugar, honey, salt, pepper, chicken stock, and a bottle of wine to slow cook for the next 8 hours).  Got notes for that script revision so I finally can get started….on Monday.  Took Suji for her cdaily arpet run.  And watched a couple films…

The horror marathon continued with two movies…

The Belko Experiment (2016)

An ordinary day at the office becomes a horrific quest for survival when 80 employees at the Belko Corp. in Bogotá, Colombia, learn that they are pawns in a deadly game.

Thoughts: A terrific critique of corporate culture. What a blast!

4.5/5

Butterfly Kisses (2018)

A filmmaker discovers a box of videotapes depicting a disturbing student film project about an urban legend known as Peeping Tom.

Thoughts: Takes a while to get going, and then never really does.

2.5/5

Today’s Yes/No…

Hot Dog Donut? Yes/Nohttps://t.co/RJHdB1jgmh

— Joseph Mallozzi (@BaronDestructo) July 2, 2022

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July 1, 2022: The Horror Marathon begins!

Working off a list of some 200 movies you helpfully recommended, I have commenced my Horror Marathon.  How long will I go and, more importantly, how many will I get through?  Who knows?!

Evolution (2016)

On a remote island, young boys are subjected to a series of strange medical treatments. One day, one of the boys, 11 year old Nicolas, makes a disturbing discovery beneath the waves…

Thoughts: Spookily atmosphere, but sedate and slow-paced.

3/5

Super Dark Times (2017)

Zach and Josh have been best friends their whole lives, but when a gruesome accident leads to a cover-up, the secret drives a wedge between them, propelling them down a rabbit hole of escalating paranoia and violence.

Thoughts: Not horror, but a pretty solid thriller. It does a great job of ratcheting up the tension while turning the screws on our main players. I only wish there had been a more logical progression to our antagonist’s dark plotting.

4/5

Revenge (2017)

Jen’s romantic getaway with her wealthy boyfriend is interrupted when his friends arrive for an impromptu hunting trip. Tensions mount until things take a dark and unexpected turn.

Thoughts: Not horror, but a slick, engrossing revenge actioner that insists you check your sense of logic at the door.

3.5

 

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June 30, 2022: Fireworks!

For much of today, my twitter feed has exuded THIS energy –

It started with an innocuous request for some off-the-radar horror movie recommendations –

Recommend me a great under-the-radar horror movie

— Joseph Mallozzi (@BaronDestructo) June 28, 2022

Which prompted an (I assumed) equally innocuous tweet –

Apparently controversial opinion: Horror-comedies don't work.

— Joseph Mallozzi (@BaronDestructo) June 29, 2022

An hour later it was ON.  A lot of people did NOT appreciate this take, many of them inexplicably angered, offering up examples of successful horror-comedies amid copious dollops of HOW DARE YOU!

That's because if we can't settle this issue here on twitter, we must move on to Kal If Fee, the ancient trial by lirpa. https://t.co/j4BhdXsWhx

— Joseph Mallozzi (@BaronDestructo) June 30, 2022

One of the most oft-repeated responses to my tweet has been along the lines of “Well, that’s just YOUR opinion!”.  And to that I would say – Well, yeah.  I assumed that would be self-evident given my use of the term “take” and the fact I chose to publish it on twitter rather than, say, the Chicago Journal of Empirical Studies.  In the future, out of an abundance of caution, all of my tweets will include the following warning:  “This tweet is just an opinion and has not been scientifically tested”.

Others felt I was being intentionally provocative so that I could garner more replies and, presumably ly, score a big cash pay-out from twitter because that’s what happens when your tweet receives a lot of engagement.  Big cash and a trophy!

And yet here you are.

— Joseph Mallozzi (@BaronDestructo) June 30, 2022

Absolutely. Twitter pays me 20 cents a response. Thanks for contributing to my retirement fund.

— Joseph Mallozzi (@BaronDestructo) June 30, 2022

To be perfectly clear, I’m not saying horror-comedies don’t exist as a sub-genre – which is something a couple of people assumed I was arguing.  They do exist and some are great movies.  But they don’t work for me as horror-comedies because the comedy almost always come at the expense of tension and suspense.

Again, to be clear, I’m referring to movies that fall into the category of horror-comedies as opposed to horror movies with comic elements.  Jordan Peele’s Get Out is an example of a great movie with flashes of humor that never undermine the integrity of the horror.

Of course there are exceptions to the rule.  Evil Dead 2 was one that came up a lot and I’ll concede it does buck the trend.  Honestly though it’s been a while since I’ve seen it and another screening may be required to confirm this.  An even better example is, I think, Scream which does an excellent job of walking that fine line, subverting the horror tropes without diluting the horror.

Anyway, it’s been an interesting experience that has taught me a valuable lesson.  In the future, I will refrain from commenting on entertainment.  I will stick to less controversial topics like politics and religion.

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JUne 29, 2022: Amazing Covers!

A few that caught my eye this week…

DIE!Namite #1 – cover art by Peach Momoko

Red Sonja #15 – cover art by Jae Lee

Iron Man/Hellcat Annual #1 – cover art by Stanley “Artgerm” Lau

Detective Comics #1061 – cover art by Ivan Reis, Danny Miki

Swamp Thing #14 – cover art by Mike Perkins

Tales of Terror Quarterly: Back to School – cover art by Pierluigi Abbondanza

 

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June 28, 2022: Akemi’s money is on the crab guts!

This morning…

Not feeling well. I blame either the steel-cut Irish oatmeal, the yogurt, or the frozen blueberries. My wife, surprisingly, suspects the crab guts pasta.

— Joseph Mallozzi (@BaronDestructo) June 28, 2022

This afternoon…

Getting back on the horse!
Hoping this salmon roe will settle my stomach. https://t.co/RY1T23oNBG pic.twitter.com/ZrBxFNDVAu

— Joseph Mallozzi (@BaronDestructo) June 28, 2022

I feel like I’ve just gone three rounds with an opponent who has been relentlessly working my midsection.  Hopefully I’ll have enough time to recover for tomorrow night’s dinner with the guys.

Today’s Yes/No…

Reiwa Pocky on the Rocks? Yes/Nohttps://t.co/69iUbwi4uW【recipe】/

— Joseph Mallozzi (@BaronDestructo) June 28, 2022

Honestly?  Meh.

I told Akemi I need this for the bedroom….

children being eaten by bears as punishment for mocking a bald man, germany, 15th century pic.twitter.com/Z7xHCcjpyL

— weird medieval guys (@WeirdMedieval) June 25, 2022

Atlantean hand stunner concept art c/o James Robbins

Man, comics have sure come a long way…

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June 27, 2022: Oh. I see we’re back to Monday again.

Waiting on those deals to close.

Yep.

Any day now…

Boy, “Ancient” laptop is right.  I think it came pre-loaded with Space Invaders.

Instead of writing anymore pilots, I'm going to focus on crafting the blow-up tweet that lands me my next show.

— Joseph Mallozzi (@BaronDestructo) June 27, 2022

This is where we planned to strand Atlantis in the unproduced Stargate: Extinction script…

TRIANGULUM GALAXY full of active HII regions pic.twitter.com/gqgfHj2sx1

— Aleix Roig (@astrocatinfo) June 26, 2022

Pages from the script.

Spooky-cool…

A ghost sculpture at the castle of Vezio, Italy pic.twitter.com/Ns7R1INB12

— History Defined (@historydefined) June 26, 2022

This shoebill stork in the rain… pic.twitter.com/daBEjwv2Zv

— Science girl (@gunsnrosesgirl3) June 27, 2022

Full report available also covers funding for classics studies like:
Why people are rude on tennis courts
How long it takes to cook breakfast
Peruvian brothels (apparently the researchers kept going back to the brothel “in the interests of accuracy.”)https://t.co/U0sqUUM82t

— Joseph Mallozzi (@BaronDestructo) June 27, 2022

Today’s Yes/No…

Chili Mango Pops? Yes/No https://t.co/4IVkiSjchM

— Joseph Mallozzi (@BaronDestructo) June 27, 2022

 

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