Andrea Michaels's Blog - Posts Tagged "events"
Mega Trends in Business
In the last blog I talked a lot about how to do business in the future. I reviewed general tips and advice I have garnered from successful people who are great at doing business. Now I'd like to get a bit more specific about trends in all aspects of our business world. They might apply to meetings and events, but in general they apply to advertising, public relations, and sales of every kind. They are what we need to keep watch on, now, and into the future. Read this today, and by tomorrow there will be a few new ones. I promise to try to keep on top of them and share.
1. Change your terminology
You no longer have "clients;" you no longer have "guests;" you no longer have "attendees" ... you have PARTICIPANTS. This changes the mind set on everything you think about and plan, because now you are offering to engage them in an experience.
2. Demographics are being replaced by psychographics, or "what do you like," not what is your age and where are you from.
3. Look closely at Generation Z, those 19 and under ... they are the participants of the future and should guide what you are doing now.
Mike Dominguez, VP of MGM Mirage, shared with me that they are building a new arena where the entire second tier will be General Admission for people to buy tickets but not purchase seats. They will stand and be a part of the experience of the concert ... an entirely new way of thinking.
4. Examine what the Music Festival Experience is all about:
*People meet others they would never normally encounter. They use the power of music as a unique tool to aid the human experience.
*Adding this to a social gathering is an unparalleled force.
*Festivals are a uniting experience; people synch with each other; in other words, they connect.
*The use of social media at events, once known for mosh pits, morphed into hyper-connected webs of social interaction.
Think of the possibilities:
*geo tagging allows users to drop a pin on their tents so participants won't get lost;
*Austin City Limits programmed RFID bracelets with credit card information so no one had to pull out cash or cards to pay for drinks; for organizers all the data needed is provided, even line control, because they can see a back-up before it happens;
*At the Sapphire Conference, use of I-Beacons and Wi-Fi heat mapping to improve the participants' experiences allowed data to be monitored in real time but analyzed later. It provided how people moved, what attracted the crowds, where they stayed the longest. And the data can be broken down into patterns by industry and job title.
5. It is still the day of "The Sharing Economy."
-We have no more secrets.
-We share ideas.
-Crowdsourcing and crowdfunding are becoming a norm.
-It's about groups and togetherness ... nothing attracts a crowd like a crowd; just look at the popularity of flash mobs.
-In the words of my friend, Colja Dams, President and CEO of Vok Dams, this is an era of word-of-mouth in 3-D.
-One Spark is a great example of a Crowdfunding Festival in Jacksonville, Florida. It proves that face-to-face connections are critical to start-up projects. The idea is that great ideas can come from anywhere; it cuts through the digital noise and allows people to connect and truly engage and get real-time feedback. Ideas are presented on multiple stages; participants cast votes at kiosks or on an event app, and significant monies are given to creators in proportion to total votes cast; it empowers the crowd to make the decisions.
A lot to absorb, right? I'm going to give you some time to mull over all of these and watch for the next blog which will continue this conversation. I invite you to participate with your own "trends." Let's get the dialogue moving!
Andrea Michaels is founder and president of Extraordinary Events, a multi-award-winning international meeting and event planning and production firm based in Los Angeles. Andrea is the author of Reflections of a Successful Wallflower: Lessons in Business; Lessons in Life and an in-demand speaker and leading voice in the special events industry. She may be reached via amichaels@extraordinaryevents.net.
1. Change your terminology
You no longer have "clients;" you no longer have "guests;" you no longer have "attendees" ... you have PARTICIPANTS. This changes the mind set on everything you think about and plan, because now you are offering to engage them in an experience.
2. Demographics are being replaced by psychographics, or "what do you like," not what is your age and where are you from.
3. Look closely at Generation Z, those 19 and under ... they are the participants of the future and should guide what you are doing now.
Mike Dominguez, VP of MGM Mirage, shared with me that they are building a new arena where the entire second tier will be General Admission for people to buy tickets but not purchase seats. They will stand and be a part of the experience of the concert ... an entirely new way of thinking.
4. Examine what the Music Festival Experience is all about:
*People meet others they would never normally encounter. They use the power of music as a unique tool to aid the human experience.
*Adding this to a social gathering is an unparalleled force.
*Festivals are a uniting experience; people synch with each other; in other words, they connect.
*The use of social media at events, once known for mosh pits, morphed into hyper-connected webs of social interaction.
Think of the possibilities:
*geo tagging allows users to drop a pin on their tents so participants won't get lost;
*Austin City Limits programmed RFID bracelets with credit card information so no one had to pull out cash or cards to pay for drinks; for organizers all the data needed is provided, even line control, because they can see a back-up before it happens;
*At the Sapphire Conference, use of I-Beacons and Wi-Fi heat mapping to improve the participants' experiences allowed data to be monitored in real time but analyzed later. It provided how people moved, what attracted the crowds, where they stayed the longest. And the data can be broken down into patterns by industry and job title.
5. It is still the day of "The Sharing Economy."
-We have no more secrets.
-We share ideas.
-Crowdsourcing and crowdfunding are becoming a norm.
-It's about groups and togetherness ... nothing attracts a crowd like a crowd; just look at the popularity of flash mobs.
-In the words of my friend, Colja Dams, President and CEO of Vok Dams, this is an era of word-of-mouth in 3-D.
-One Spark is a great example of a Crowdfunding Festival in Jacksonville, Florida. It proves that face-to-face connections are critical to start-up projects. The idea is that great ideas can come from anywhere; it cuts through the digital noise and allows people to connect and truly engage and get real-time feedback. Ideas are presented on multiple stages; participants cast votes at kiosks or on an event app, and significant monies are given to creators in proportion to total votes cast; it empowers the crowd to make the decisions.
A lot to absorb, right? I'm going to give you some time to mull over all of these and watch for the next blog which will continue this conversation. I invite you to participate with your own "trends." Let's get the dialogue moving!
Andrea Michaels is founder and president of Extraordinary Events, a multi-award-winning international meeting and event planning and production firm based in Los Angeles. Andrea is the author of Reflections of a Successful Wallflower: Lessons in Business; Lessons in Life and an in-demand speaker and leading voice in the special events industry. She may be reached via amichaels@extraordinaryevents.net.
Published on October 23, 2015 15:39
•
Tags:
business, events, psychographics, trends
Leadership: Teach or Preach?
Les M. Goldberg gave me his book, Don’t Take No for an Answer: Anything is Possible, and I opened it up randomly and this is what popped up:
“You can’t intimidate people into excelling.” I am quoting him here because I have been thinking about leadership, management, and the relationship of employer to employee, and Les’ words capture so much about what I am thinking.
In reading on, Les says: “ It’s not unusual for employees to be intimidated by the company’s founder or senior management. I don’t feel I’m an intimidating person, but when it was brought to my attention that sometimes I appear that way, I began making a conscious effort to change that perception. People who are intimidated will not perform at their highest level. Intimidation is not a good motivational tool. Certainly managers must maintain their authority but it doesn’t need to be done through fear. Respect is woven through our core values because it creates an atmosphere where people can and will excel.”
And all of that wisdom wrapped around me from just one page! I cannot even imagine what I’m going to learn as I read more pages. For now, though, (and thank you, Les) let’s just stick to this one topic. In it, Les talks about not only management but leadership. To me, leadership is defined as leading by example. And that means never asking someone to do what you are not willing to do yourself. (Unless of course you are talking about computer skills, and I will confess I’m usually always asking for help in that realm).
The other night we had to get a major proposal out, and my team could have run with the information they had and finished it… by themselves. I didn’t leave them until it was finished. Why? Because to me it wouldn’t be fair to expect them to stay late, give up their time, and work late into the night if I was not also willing to do so and be a support to them.
As an event management agency, we work long and late hours when producing events. I am there for set up, and I am there for load out. I don’t leave when the fun part is over. I hope that illustrates that I am not only a boss but am always there in case I am needed. I will sweep floors, bus dining tables, and do anything necessary on site. I want to lead by example.Does that sound a bit too “oh, admire me, I’m wonderful?” I hope not, because I’m just trying to make a point. I’m supportive. But does that mean that I am also a good manager and good leader? What do I expect of myself in those areas? I think if I am good at anything it is listening. This is key to being a successful manager/leader. It’s not just about what I want, and what I have to say. It’s not about preaching. It’s about guiding and teaching. So let me use an example in the world of event planning.
My team is young, and they will make some mistakes. A long time ago I walked into a room that had been set up by a young producer, and I knew that it was “wrong.” Instead of being critical and saying, “This is wrong and here’s how to fix it,” I asked her to walk the space with me from the guest’s point of view from entry to departure and see how the experience felt. What were the sightlines? What were the access points to bars and buffets? Would guests be able to flow well throughout the room? You know the drill.
I knew how to fix all the problems and could have changed everything quickly. But it would not have taught her anything. I would have missed a “teachable moment.” I let her discover how to improve the room layout by herself and merely guided her into the solutions.
If I’m understanding Les’ point, I believe that “lecturing” is intimidating. “Discussing” is not. It’s much like a parental role where parents guide their children through life; they don’t intimidate them by telling them what to do and how to do it and never let them make their own mistakes. They help them grow up.
As employers, aka “bosses,” I think that a parental and non-judgmental role is key to successful management. What do you think?
Les M. Goldberg’s book is available on Amazon.
Andrea Michaels is founder and president of Extraordinary Events, a multi-award-winning international event agency based in Los Angeles. Andrea is the author of Reflections of a Successful Wallflower: Lessons in Business; Lessons in Life and an in-demand speaker and leading voice in the special events industry. She may be reached via amichaels@extraordinaryevents.net.
“You can’t intimidate people into excelling.” I am quoting him here because I have been thinking about leadership, management, and the relationship of employer to employee, and Les’ words capture so much about what I am thinking.
In reading on, Les says: “ It’s not unusual for employees to be intimidated by the company’s founder or senior management. I don’t feel I’m an intimidating person, but when it was brought to my attention that sometimes I appear that way, I began making a conscious effort to change that perception. People who are intimidated will not perform at their highest level. Intimidation is not a good motivational tool. Certainly managers must maintain their authority but it doesn’t need to be done through fear. Respect is woven through our core values because it creates an atmosphere where people can and will excel.”
And all of that wisdom wrapped around me from just one page! I cannot even imagine what I’m going to learn as I read more pages. For now, though, (and thank you, Les) let’s just stick to this one topic. In it, Les talks about not only management but leadership. To me, leadership is defined as leading by example. And that means never asking someone to do what you are not willing to do yourself. (Unless of course you are talking about computer skills, and I will confess I’m usually always asking for help in that realm).
The other night we had to get a major proposal out, and my team could have run with the information they had and finished it… by themselves. I didn’t leave them until it was finished. Why? Because to me it wouldn’t be fair to expect them to stay late, give up their time, and work late into the night if I was not also willing to do so and be a support to them.
As an event management agency, we work long and late hours when producing events. I am there for set up, and I am there for load out. I don’t leave when the fun part is over. I hope that illustrates that I am not only a boss but am always there in case I am needed. I will sweep floors, bus dining tables, and do anything necessary on site. I want to lead by example.Does that sound a bit too “oh, admire me, I’m wonderful?” I hope not, because I’m just trying to make a point. I’m supportive. But does that mean that I am also a good manager and good leader? What do I expect of myself in those areas? I think if I am good at anything it is listening. This is key to being a successful manager/leader. It’s not just about what I want, and what I have to say. It’s not about preaching. It’s about guiding and teaching. So let me use an example in the world of event planning.
My team is young, and they will make some mistakes. A long time ago I walked into a room that had been set up by a young producer, and I knew that it was “wrong.” Instead of being critical and saying, “This is wrong and here’s how to fix it,” I asked her to walk the space with me from the guest’s point of view from entry to departure and see how the experience felt. What were the sightlines? What were the access points to bars and buffets? Would guests be able to flow well throughout the room? You know the drill.
I knew how to fix all the problems and could have changed everything quickly. But it would not have taught her anything. I would have missed a “teachable moment.” I let her discover how to improve the room layout by herself and merely guided her into the solutions.
If I’m understanding Les’ point, I believe that “lecturing” is intimidating. “Discussing” is not. It’s much like a parental role where parents guide their children through life; they don’t intimidate them by telling them what to do and how to do it and never let them make their own mistakes. They help them grow up.
As employers, aka “bosses,” I think that a parental and non-judgmental role is key to successful management. What do you think?
Les M. Goldberg’s book is available on Amazon.
Andrea Michaels is founder and president of Extraordinary Events, a multi-award-winning international event agency based in Los Angeles. Andrea is the author of Reflections of a Successful Wallflower: Lessons in Business; Lessons in Life and an in-demand speaker and leading voice in the special events industry. She may be reached via amichaels@extraordinaryevents.net.
Published on May 05, 2016 11:04
•
Tags:
business, events, leadership, management
ASSUME Makes an ASS out of U and ME
If we aren’t careful, being in the event business can lead to a life of “gotchas.” Never mind that we have tons of expertise. Murphy’s Law rules. I was reminded the other day of one of my gotchas. It was one of the most valuable lessons that I learned in the earlier years at Extraordinary Events. However, like all lessons learned, it can also be a lesson forgotten… until reminded… and therein lies the rub.
Lesson One: We had been hired to come up with an innovative method for Los Angeles to present its bid to The Democratic National Committee to host the convention (which incidentally L.A. won). So, here’s our presentation at the South Hall Lobby of the Los Angeles Convention Center.
The DNC arrived by limo into an empty convention hall. Committee members walked a red carpet which led them to a loooong balloon wall that spelled out Los Angeles. Where were they supposed to go?
With a rousing fanfare of unseen herald trumpets, the balloon wall burst open in one magical explosion and revealed the entry to the South Hall Lobby where a long line of faux paparazzi applauded them into the hall. Down an escalator they went to join the executives and VIPs of the Los Angeles Visitors and Convention Bureau and the city. Music. Morning fare. Very nice. And angels, lots of them. And then… from 400 feet overhead, accompanied by a beautiful piece of ethereal music, an angel descended and performed an aerial ballet until she landed at the feet of the DNC members and handed them Los Angeles’ bid. Magically, she arose again to disappear 400 feet above. It was a moment that the press wrote about and photographed for print and live television.
But, that’s not all they wrote! They also wrote about the angels that were already in the room, and herein is our story.
We had specified to our talent coordinator that we wanted a room of angels to circulate. I had great faith in his judgment. But I should have said, “Describe every person and every costume,” but I didn’t. So here’s what I got. One angel was in scarlet red lingerie and sequined wings. Another wore a Frederick’s of Hollywood black bustier with black feather wings (think whips and chains angel), and it went on from there. Yep, there was plenty about which to write!
Lesson Two: Years had passed since Lesson One. We were hired to produce a major, no holds barred, community event for what turned out to be hundreds of thousands of people, and at the last minute the client requested dancers to accompany the D.J.
I guess my interpretation of “dancer” and the local talent producer’s definition were polar opposites. His was “bump and grind” and mine was what would be appropriate for a family audience. All that the dancers were missing was a pole, and oh yes, a lot of costume. I had asked to preview the costumes, and they showed me a sample of one, which though sexy, was relatively covered up. My mistake was in not asking if all the dancers would be wearing that same costume. They were not. The others were bare…. very bare… as a matter of fact, too bare.
They had not been performing for more than a minute before my client on radio was shouting “get them off the stage!” and as the music was pulsating loudly there was no way for them to hear me until I had to physically climb onto eight different platforms and pull them off one at a time, with all of them resisting since they had never before met me and couldn’t hear me.
The Lesson
Never make an assumption. NEVER! Check every detail. Repeatedly. Ask for write-ups and descriptions. Ask for photos. And in the case of entertainment, check them out BEFORE they go on stage, while they are in the dressing rooms. Ask them to bring a variety of costumes so you can see what you are getting. Define what you need. What do YOU mean by “dancer”? Don’t ever feel too secure. Don’t assume! You know what that makes out of you and me!
Lesson One: We had been hired to come up with an innovative method for Los Angeles to present its bid to The Democratic National Committee to host the convention (which incidentally L.A. won). So, here’s our presentation at the South Hall Lobby of the Los Angeles Convention Center.
The DNC arrived by limo into an empty convention hall. Committee members walked a red carpet which led them to a loooong balloon wall that spelled out Los Angeles. Where were they supposed to go?
With a rousing fanfare of unseen herald trumpets, the balloon wall burst open in one magical explosion and revealed the entry to the South Hall Lobby where a long line of faux paparazzi applauded them into the hall. Down an escalator they went to join the executives and VIPs of the Los Angeles Visitors and Convention Bureau and the city. Music. Morning fare. Very nice. And angels, lots of them. And then… from 400 feet overhead, accompanied by a beautiful piece of ethereal music, an angel descended and performed an aerial ballet until she landed at the feet of the DNC members and handed them Los Angeles’ bid. Magically, she arose again to disappear 400 feet above. It was a moment that the press wrote about and photographed for print and live television.
But, that’s not all they wrote! They also wrote about the angels that were already in the room, and herein is our story.
We had specified to our talent coordinator that we wanted a room of angels to circulate. I had great faith in his judgment. But I should have said, “Describe every person and every costume,” but I didn’t. So here’s what I got. One angel was in scarlet red lingerie and sequined wings. Another wore a Frederick’s of Hollywood black bustier with black feather wings (think whips and chains angel), and it went on from there. Yep, there was plenty about which to write!
Lesson Two: Years had passed since Lesson One. We were hired to produce a major, no holds barred, community event for what turned out to be hundreds of thousands of people, and at the last minute the client requested dancers to accompany the D.J.
I guess my interpretation of “dancer” and the local talent producer’s definition were polar opposites. His was “bump and grind” and mine was what would be appropriate for a family audience. All that the dancers were missing was a pole, and oh yes, a lot of costume. I had asked to preview the costumes, and they showed me a sample of one, which though sexy, was relatively covered up. My mistake was in not asking if all the dancers would be wearing that same costume. They were not. The others were bare…. very bare… as a matter of fact, too bare.
They had not been performing for more than a minute before my client on radio was shouting “get them off the stage!” and as the music was pulsating loudly there was no way for them to hear me until I had to physically climb onto eight different platforms and pull them off one at a time, with all of them resisting since they had never before met me and couldn’t hear me.
The Lesson
Never make an assumption. NEVER! Check every detail. Repeatedly. Ask for write-ups and descriptions. Ask for photos. And in the case of entertainment, check them out BEFORE they go on stage, while they are in the dressing rooms. Ask them to bring a variety of costumes so you can see what you are getting. Define what you need. What do YOU mean by “dancer”? Don’t ever feel too secure. Don’t assume! You know what that makes out of you and me!
Published on June 29, 2016 14:21
•
Tags:
business, event-planning, events, mistakes
The Fine Art of Biting Your Tongue
Quite a few years ago while attending a meeting in the United Arab Emirates, I was also asked to do a site inspection for the Super Bowl of Rotax Go Carts (they claimed to be as big as NASCAR internationally) in nearby Al Ain. I confess I had never heard of this, but it sounded intriguing. Never one to dismiss an opportunity, I sallied forth and made some complicated arrangements to meet an elusive client. He was hard to reach and when we did talk there was a lot of wind noise going on.
I was escorted by limo about two hours out of Abu Dhabi into the desert where we saw some great museums and palaces and even the racing camel market and finally arrived at... well, more desert with just a temporary trailer-type of building. I knocked on the door. No one answered, so I called the cell number I was given. No answer. We drove around looking for anything or anyone other than sand. Nothing. So, we drove back to the building. Finally, in the distance, I could see a Porsche racing toward me. In a flurry of dust, it came to a stop right where I was standing. And out of it, a young man. Gorgeous. Looked like the dictionary definition of a race car driver - tight jeans, tight t-shirt, glistening smile. And wind-blow hair which explained why our conversations were always noisy.
We shook hands. I mentally drooled a lot. We entered the "building." I began to ask about the event. Where was it going to be? He waved at the sand. How are you going to be ready in a few months? He shrugged. What would you like to accomplish for this event, and how can we help you?
"Just fill in what I don't have here and make this an event comparable to a Super Bowl... exciting... fabulous."
Music to my ears. But I've heard those words before. What's the budget?
"There are no limits."
Uh-huh. Heard those words before, too. So, a million dollars would be okay?
I revived him.
I asked for an example of what he thought was a wow. He started with lasers, but told me that there were hundreds of laser companies nearby, so there was no need for me to look for those. Hundreds? I told him that anytime anyone I knew had worked in his part of the world that lasers had been brought in from the U.S. or Europe. And then I realized what he meant and knew that he had no idea what he was talking about. But I couldn't resist asking, Where are you finding all these hundreds of companies"
And he told me, "In the phone book."
I replied Show me, please," very politely, of course.
He opened up the directory (aka phone book) and showed me. I said quietly, without cracking a smile, You're looking under laser surgery. Then I immediately started talking about what other things we could do in which he might be interested.
The Lesson
It's impolite to disable people and not take them seriously, especially if they are inexperienced. It's particularly important not to embarrass or make them feel uncomfortable. It's up to us to educate kindly, just do our jobs and not laugh uproariously at some of the things we hear!
And this doesn't just apply to the inexperienced. It's a good policy no matter with whom you are dealing. During the 1988 Special Event in Los Angeles at the Bonaventure Hotel, the hotel's Director of Catering (name withheld to protect the guilty), was serving as the event team committee chair. He called a meeting at the hotel, and everyone involved in the convention attended. I made what I thought was an appropriate suggestion to better the conference. Instead of taking it under consideration, he reamed me, dressed me up one side and down the other in front of all my peers. We all sat in stunned silence. (And anyone who knows me understands I am never at a loss for words. Some people are always thinking "Oh, I wish I had been quick enough to answer" but I NEVER have THAT problem. I always know exactly what I want to say.) At first, all I wanted to do was produce the perfect comeback to embarrass him in front of all. My second thought was to yell "F**K YOU!" but that would have been unprofessional, so I smiled like a lady and carried on as part of the committee. Afterward, everyone said they didn't know how I sat through it but confessed they saw each of us for who we truly were. Years later and everyone still remembers that interchange and how I handled it. So, no matter what you want to say to a client or an associate, you will always win if you bite your tongue and behave like a professional.
I have experienced some similar episodes since, and I continue to be silent. Silence is the most powerful tool we all have and, when used correctly, will almost always empower the one who is silent. I learned this from an expert in the art of buying a vehicle. When the zealous salesperson makes an offer, remain silent and just look him (or her) in the eye. That person will usually keep dropping the price (because they are uncomfortable) until you get to where you want to be and speak up for the first time.
Another approach, particularly if you are in conflict with someone who is ranting and raving, is what I call the board game analogy. If you are playing a game with someone and pick up your pieces and walk away, they can't play anymore. Game over. That's my philosophy. Walking away disempowers that person. Use it only when you must.
I was escorted by limo about two hours out of Abu Dhabi into the desert where we saw some great museums and palaces and even the racing camel market and finally arrived at... well, more desert with just a temporary trailer-type of building. I knocked on the door. No one answered, so I called the cell number I was given. No answer. We drove around looking for anything or anyone other than sand. Nothing. So, we drove back to the building. Finally, in the distance, I could see a Porsche racing toward me. In a flurry of dust, it came to a stop right where I was standing. And out of it, a young man. Gorgeous. Looked like the dictionary definition of a race car driver - tight jeans, tight t-shirt, glistening smile. And wind-blow hair which explained why our conversations were always noisy.
We shook hands. I mentally drooled a lot. We entered the "building." I began to ask about the event. Where was it going to be? He waved at the sand. How are you going to be ready in a few months? He shrugged. What would you like to accomplish for this event, and how can we help you?
"Just fill in what I don't have here and make this an event comparable to a Super Bowl... exciting... fabulous."
Music to my ears. But I've heard those words before. What's the budget?
"There are no limits."
Uh-huh. Heard those words before, too. So, a million dollars would be okay?
I revived him.
I asked for an example of what he thought was a wow. He started with lasers, but told me that there were hundreds of laser companies nearby, so there was no need for me to look for those. Hundreds? I told him that anytime anyone I knew had worked in his part of the world that lasers had been brought in from the U.S. or Europe. And then I realized what he meant and knew that he had no idea what he was talking about. But I couldn't resist asking, Where are you finding all these hundreds of companies"
And he told me, "In the phone book."
I replied Show me, please," very politely, of course.
He opened up the directory (aka phone book) and showed me. I said quietly, without cracking a smile, You're looking under laser surgery. Then I immediately started talking about what other things we could do in which he might be interested.
The Lesson
It's impolite to disable people and not take them seriously, especially if they are inexperienced. It's particularly important not to embarrass or make them feel uncomfortable. It's up to us to educate kindly, just do our jobs and not laugh uproariously at some of the things we hear!
And this doesn't just apply to the inexperienced. It's a good policy no matter with whom you are dealing. During the 1988 Special Event in Los Angeles at the Bonaventure Hotel, the hotel's Director of Catering (name withheld to protect the guilty), was serving as the event team committee chair. He called a meeting at the hotel, and everyone involved in the convention attended. I made what I thought was an appropriate suggestion to better the conference. Instead of taking it under consideration, he reamed me, dressed me up one side and down the other in front of all my peers. We all sat in stunned silence. (And anyone who knows me understands I am never at a loss for words. Some people are always thinking "Oh, I wish I had been quick enough to answer" but I NEVER have THAT problem. I always know exactly what I want to say.) At first, all I wanted to do was produce the perfect comeback to embarrass him in front of all. My second thought was to yell "F**K YOU!" but that would have been unprofessional, so I smiled like a lady and carried on as part of the committee. Afterward, everyone said they didn't know how I sat through it but confessed they saw each of us for who we truly were. Years later and everyone still remembers that interchange and how I handled it. So, no matter what you want to say to a client or an associate, you will always win if you bite your tongue and behave like a professional.
I have experienced some similar episodes since, and I continue to be silent. Silence is the most powerful tool we all have and, when used correctly, will almost always empower the one who is silent. I learned this from an expert in the art of buying a vehicle. When the zealous salesperson makes an offer, remain silent and just look him (or her) in the eye. That person will usually keep dropping the price (because they are uncomfortable) until you get to where you want to be and speak up for the first time.
Another approach, particularly if you are in conflict with someone who is ranting and raving, is what I call the board game analogy. If you are playing a game with someone and pick up your pieces and walk away, they can't play anymore. Game over. That's my philosophy. Walking away disempowers that person. Use it only when you must.
Published on July 13, 2016 08:55
•
Tags:
customer-relations, events, vendor-relations