Asrai Devin's Blog, page 10
May 28, 2012
I can do it all
I have found my leader.
Emilie Wapnick, multi potentialite.
A multipotentialite is a person who has many different interests and creative pursuits in life.
– from Putty-Like terminology page
Uh, yeah hi, me.
I wrote a few weeks ago about having trouble choosing a niche, which every successful blogger says is necessary. Turns out, maybe not.
This isn’t the first time I’ve come across the idea, something Emilie (I love referencing people as if I know them personally) admits in her free download “The ‘Undeclared for Life’ Manifesto: A Plan of Attack for the Person with Many Interests and Creative Pursuits in Life “
Barbara Sher is one of the first places. In many of her books she encourages people to list everything they are interested in and then find time to fit those into their lives. Whether or not they are your job, you may feel unfulfilled if you don’t try everything. She has an entire book on what she calls Scanners, Refuse to Choose.
Carol Adrienne talks about life purpose in her book “The Purpose of Your Life” but not in a “this is the job you are supposed to do” way. She talks about purpose on the more general level, creating, teaching, communicating the possibilities are endless. And she also has a long history of working more “menial” jobs to support her life and fitting the passions around the edges.
And Justine Musk wrote about this in late May 2012, when she talked about combining some of your deep interests or passions, even interests that are totally unrelated, and creating something entirely world-changing.
Like spirituality and money.
Like sex and spirituality (tantra).
Like all the things in my life connecting to Motherhood.
There are some common threads. And I don’t have to pick one thing. I can do it all. As long as it’s high concept.
Do you have a niche or are you trying to do it all?
Tagged: Asrai Devin, Barbara Sher, books, doing it all and looking good, Emilie Wapnick, Justine Musk, motherhood, multiple interests, Scanner, Sexuality, stay at home mom, Tantra
May 25, 2012
Guilty(?) pleasures: Little Big Planet
I dunno if this one even counts as guilty or pleasure. I referenced the hit game in last week`s post with a video embedded of a song within the game.
In the game you control your totally customizable Sackperson and you make them run, jump and swing around different levels, much like Super Mario, except with more problem solving. Each obstacles is a lesson in timing, judgment, physics, and frustration patience.
In each level you collect different items to customize your Sackperson or you pick up stickers. Some stickers open hidden or locked stickers. Some stickers are just for decorating. Some of the obstacles are multi-player, so you need a second or sometimes 3rd or 4th person to complete.
The music is great as well. I posted last week my favorite song. Here is another one, totally catchy, not much to the lyrics, I guess he didn`t want to forget them.
[image error]
Now stay off my patch and I won`t have to bring you down!
Tagged: Asrai Devin, Games, LittleBigPlanet, Mario, Mario Games, Platform, Sackperson, Sticker, Video Games
May 21, 2012
What do you mean Niche Down?
I want to know everything
I want to be everywhere
I want to fuck everyone in the world
I want to do something that matters
– I Do Not Want This written by Trent Reznor, Nine Inch Nails
I read a lot of different things about writing, and about business. I fancy myself an entrepeneur without a business. Yet. Writing is writing, I need to write fiction, but I need something more.
I love Danielle LaPorte, who led me to Marie Forleo. Who I am cursing.
If you go to Ms. Forleo’s website she has a free sign up for the “rich, happy and hot business school”. And I am a sucker for these things. My in box is quite over run with free newsletters that seem interesting. Anyway, I am watching her free video the 6 pillars of business. Which i only got half through.
And I’m pissed. Because the advice for business (and/or bloggers) is to NICHE DOWN. Niche, niche, niche, until you find your thing that are super excited about that you can sell.
I hate this advice. It makes me want to pout and kick things. I don’t want to stick to one thing.
Marie (see me and my good friend, Marie, who I know so well because I’ve been following her blog for a week now) says if you niche down first and get successful there, you can branch out later. You can listen to her say it in a video about “Should one combine passions or choose one?“
alright, I can buy that. Barbara Sher says similar things. You can choose one passion for your money making, but still work on other passions on the weekends, or even less frequently.
I’ve exhausted myself on this little bit of soul searching. I don’t know where I’m going to go yet. This is an ongoing struggle for me, as I try to find my place. This morning had me writing really artsy things in my head, a bit like Paulo Coehlo. Reading his work makes me feel pretentious, that’s how my artsy writing makes me feel. I love how it feels, but at the same time I feel like I’m posing. But I’m going to write it and post it. These things will probably venture into Mature territory. Much of my thinking time is “how can I add smut into the mix?”
What do you think of the advice to “niche down”? Does niche have a role in fiction writer’s blogs? Do you niche? Should I forget about the entire niche plan and just run wild?
Tagged: Asrai Devin, Barbara Sher, Blog, blogging, Danielle LaPorte, niche, niche blog, niche blogging, Nine Inch Nails, Paulo Coelho, Trent Reznor, Writers Resources, writing
May 19, 2012
Interspiration 5192012
Abandoned all hope #Row80 Checkin http://wp.me/p5HGG-Nw
Show time! Blogging is like live theatre. http://bit.ly/L25x4n via@SusieLindau
Living the Yay Life. What you’s Yay thing? http://bit.ly/L25Zjf via@ColeenPatrick
4 stages of healing childhood abuse via @LouiseBehiel
5 things writer’s can learn from Taylor Swift.
It’s all in your perspective http://wp.me/p5HGG-Nc
Self-publishing is not the easy way. A rant from @AMhairiSimpson
DIY bedskirt tutorial. My daughter’s bed needs a bedskirt.http://bit.ly/L27MVj
Random Acts of Kindness Blitz via @GeneLempp http://bit.ly/JWfLOW
the urge to purge: how to let go http://bit.ly/JAWzI0 I need this, I’m trying to declutter. but now it’s all in the hallway
Always on the cutting edge @NatalieHartford on the latest in women’s undergarments. http://bit.ly/JAYjBc
Is it bad if you are trying to edit but keep getting lost in your witty writing? #amwriting—
Asrai Devin (@asrai) May 15, 2012
thoughts for a well-trained mind: sucess via @Ali_Denthttp://bit.ly/JAZocm
I should really not yell at people on their blogs. Need to learn to keep my mouth shut on other's stupidity. Dumb, dumb, dumb.—
Asrai Devin (@asrai) May 15, 2012
This was a week when I shoved my foot in my mouth. Several times. I pissed my SIL with good reason on her behalf.
10 social media pet peeves. http://bit.ly/JB7CRz I agree with most of it.
Jealous!! RT @dragonage: Want to know what the first fans to see Dawn of the Seeker thought of the movie? http://bit.ly/L8gEZz
LOL awesome. RT @jesswitkins: Advice for Bella Swanhttp://wp.me/p1z3kC-CC via @wordpressdotcom
This is pretty powerful. The creator’s manifesto. http://bit.ly/K4J15k
The difference between money work and busy work.http://bit.ly/JG8JOV
What you don’t really understand. http://bit.ly/L9uElS
Why is fiction good for us via @Colin_Falconer http://bit.ly/IXNFBg
@NatalieHartford with urban word wednesday Famine Underwearhttp://bit.ly/IXN7LV Almost there, need to do laundry.
I bet when you blog about underwear you get lots of mentions and incoming links.
Value of Earning http://bit.ly/IXMKAN via @_FabioBueno_
Are you a gentlewoman? http://bit.ly/IXOgmu
Sometimes it’s the simple things via @KristyKJameshttp://bit.ly/IXRNRP
You are mom enough if someone calls you mom. http://bit.ly/IXSRoMTHANK YOU!
Things not to do: go on craftser, search DragonAge. Things to do: study writing course. @Dragonage for the win. http://bit.ly/LULJwu
which lead to this:
@dragonage @asrai What exactly is a poppet? Is it like a puppet?—
Sarah Anderson (@SarahJLA) May 17, 2012
to which I said I would like to fill my bed with all the characters, but I thought my husband might get jealous
@dragonage @asrai Apparently it is a British word for doll, and also a type of Voodoo doll. Look out, Duncan!—
Sarah Anderson (@SarahJLA) May 18, 2012
Truths about you and your work. http://bit.ly/KfjLte
Be the example you want to see http://bit.ly/KfkACr
Stop dreaming the reasonable. Dream unreasonably big things from@thecreativepenn http://bit.ly/Kfpxv9
10,000 Hours For Writers: http://j.mp/KO0yRU (cool, short video)
The best way to network: serve others. http://bit.ly/KmdP23
my idea of the week: start a youtube show that is real DIY and sell it to the DIY network. #ideaparty. bit.ly/LXyrPX Maybe ..—
Asrai Devin (@asrai) May 17, 2012
Where are your edges? http://bit.ly/LXCagj via @justinemusk my edges and voice are emerging. This life is a work in progress.
How to write fast (at least faster). http://bit.ly/JikFbo
That is super cool. RT @JessicaMerizan: If dragons were real, this is what I think they’d look like :) http://instagr.am/p/KvYbAzN5-S/
How inspiring would it be to live at Pooh Corner? http://bit.ly/Jjx3Kx
Sex in public: finding liberation through fear. http://bit.ly/Jjxl3VEv’Yan’s blog is one of my favorites online.
don’t use too many tags and other wordpress goodies via@SusieLindau http://bit.ly/JjxXXg
Blog better by slowing down. http://bit.ly/JlyWq4
Songs you can’t understand http://wp.me/p5HGG-MR
Tagged: Asrai Devin, Bella Swan, blog links, link mash-up, RT (TV network), Social media, Social network, Taylor Swift
May 18, 2012
Songs you can’t understand
I’ve noticed there are a lot of people who enjoy listening to music they cannot understand. Be it Celtic, French, Indian, Spanish or another of the many languages.
I first heard this song on Little Big Planet, which in itself is a post. The song is in Spanish. It’s a pretty catchy little tune. Here is a link to the lyrics and a translation of the lyrics into English.
It always drive me crazy when these types of songs get stuck in my head, I cannot walk around singing them, because I don`t know the actual words. Yet I can hear them.
Are there songs you enjoy that you cannot understand the words to? What do you do when it gets stuck in your head?
Tagged: Asrai Devin, English, English language, first language, French language, India, Language, Lyrics, mother tongue, Music, second language, Spanish language
May 14, 2012
It’s all in your perspective
I spent the morning shopping with my mother and sister in law. I stay out of shops, because in an effort to reach our long term goals we are on a strict budget. Meanwhile, my sister in law places no such limitations on herself. I try not to shop with her because I always spend more than I planned. It was difficult to walk out with nothing. I have money in the bank I could drop on things we don’t really need, but that I want.
“The more we have the more we want.” from Predictably Irrational: The Hidden Forces That Shape Our Decisions by Dan Ariely,
Why is some people are happy with their lot in life? While other people, people we consider much more “well-off” than us are so unhappy?
Life is often a decision making ordeal. We have to decide which soap is better, which entree is better, which route to take.
We are wired to compare. We are really good at comparing ourselves. We compare ourselves to our peers. We compare ourselves to our siblings. We compare ourselves to our parents. And we want to come out on top.
Ariely has a little story about family practice doctors who compare themselves to surgical or Wall-Street consulting “peers”, who make considerably more money then the family practitioners. Or the wife who compares her husband’s salary to her sister’s husband’s salary. You know someone is going home from that unhappy.
It is why we love to watch rich people who have severely dysfunctional lives. We can look at them and say “They have money, but at least my family enjoys my company and my children will grow up knowing the value of a dollar.”
How do we stop from comparing to others and making ourselves unhappy in the process?
Decide what is important in your life.
Sure buying the salamander wall art I saw would really great on my wall. But it really isn’t going to further my other life goals. In a few weeks, I would barely notice it any longer on my wall.
Change who you are comparing with
Sure those doctors arent’ making as much as their doctor peers. But they are making more money then the rest of us.
Change the point of comparison
All choices are trade offs. A woman compares her husband’s salary to another’s, and finds he could be making a lot more money. Except his work hours would increase from 40 to 55 per week. Is the extra money that important that she’d give up 15 hours per week with her husband? Maybe not.
Let go of comparing all together
All choices have trade offs. For instance, if you are comparing your child to a friend’s child of a different age, you are going to find a differences, and places where your child just isn’t at the same level. Does it matter? Your child can’t draw as well or didn’t get the lead in the school play, but she excels at the piano and she is reading above her grade level. And they are both happy children who have parents that love them. Which is the most important part of a child’s life?
Pratice gratitude
Being mindful and grateful for what you do have puts great perspective on your life.
Tagged: Ariely, Asrai Devin, child, Dan Ariely, Decision making, goal setting, goals, Happiness, long term goals, Parent, Predictably Irrational
May 13, 2012
Abandoned all hope #Row80 Checkin
I’ve fallen off the wagon. sort of.
In doing this How to think Sideways, I’ve had to stop my work in progress stuff, because I want to apply all my lessons to what I”m writing. So for the time being, I’m just letting it go, taking the stuff I was working on that wasn’t working and applying lessons to it.
So I”m letting go of my word count goal. As long as I’m doing something creative and writerly every day, that’s the important thing right now.
Blogging twice a week. Doing it. Pondering niche vs not, at least for Mondays. It was motivation, but that’s not really the thing I love. what I love to ponder is money. How to save, how to spend, how to invest, how to budget. I would love to be a money coach, something like Gail Vaz-Oxlade does on Til Debt Do Us Part and Princess. It’s in the back of my mind right now.
And my last goal was to get outside. Spent the entire day yesterday and will do it again today outside. We pulled the old deck off yesterday and now will spend the next two days rebuilding. Has to be done by Monday evening as hubby returns to work on Tuesday. My shoulder and back are sore this morning.
But, we’ve been walking to school and then Sunshine Boy, our 2 year old, and I go play for a while outside. Sometimes in the yard, sometimes at a park. The other day we found a hill. We’ve also been going to the playground while my Big Girl is at Karate. Except the wind here is so freaking brutal All The Time.
Happy Mother’s Day to everyone, because Everyone deserves love no matter what your situation. I get to eat out tonight. But today will be semi-brutal. Trying to keep track of children and help build a deck. And other things.
Tagged: Gail Vaz-Oxlade, Monday, Mother's Day, Princess, WIP, Word count
May 12, 2012
Interspiration #5122012
It was an okay week. Hubby worked a ton, which we needed. Got my first ever Smashwords payment (that may have been last week). Did a ton of work with How to Think Sideways course from Holly Lisle. Castle was AWSOME!! Hubby got dizzy with benign paroxysmal positional vertigo, and which really has no treatment, but this weird thing called the Epley maneuver, which has a high success rate.
And I painted the wall behind the computer desk olive brown. Looks awesome, except for the white showing through the bits I missed, it’s a textured wall. Pictures later. Eventually.
Hope everyone had a good week. Sorry to everyone who had awesome posts that I couldn’t include or missed.
Things you must know: how to make fruity cocktails.http://bit.ly/LuOKDH
Good music for good cars? (at least the selling aspect)http://bit.ly/LuPJ6L via @_FabioBueno_
Celebrate your artistic voice. http://bit.ly/KcxaWZ via @ColeenPatrick
Summer TV is not just reruns anymore. http://bit.ly/LuOvbK Some higlights for your summer viewing. via @SSchroeder_
Don’t let your ego destroy your writing via @goinswriterhttp://bit.ly/IEW9hW
What is the experience that your creative genius is giving people? That’s your real business. http://huff.to/LuNMaw
Guilty Pleasures: 1Bruce1 http://wp.me/p5HGG-Mj
Best mentor ever? You be the judge. http://bit.ly/LuJHD8 At least there’s a moral at the end of the story.
Finding self-compassion from positive parenting @fbpptbhttp://bit.ly/LuJbVK
bit.ly/LuMmwA this is stuck in my head. anyone got mental floss?—
Asrai Devin (@asrai) May 11, 2012
There will always be an idea that looks better than the one you are working on. http://bit.ly/KOq5HX via @the99percent
Ready to make it big? http://bit.ly/LuHZBz via the receiving project.
Oh #FF @KristyKJames @LornaSuzuki @LouiseBehiel @SSchroeder_ @DanielleLaPorte and anyone handing out free candy. Ignore the safety warnings.—
Asrai Devin (@asrai) May 11, 2012
Take environmental lessons from bad kitties. http://bit.ly/LuHAPM via@myplasticfreelife
Make a cotton tea bag. http://bit.ly/LuHiIs
Season finale that disappoints. http://bit.ly/LuG6Fd
I should stay off popular media sites where people write about things they don't understand. "Where is the 50 Shades of Gray for men?"—
Asrai Devin (@asrai) May 11, 2012
8 steps for an emotionally healthy family. http://bit.ly/LuQ7lz
It must be a blog post if it’s posted on a blog. http://bit.ly/JebvL6 I want to whine about blogging way more than this post does.
Okay, I Got Nuthin http://wp.me/p1LbTM-oZ
Revising to make old stories new. http://bit.ly/Jdzp9P
That is tragic. Very tragic. RT @LornaSuzuki: Wanted to watch Castle episode last night but cable crapped out… again.—
Asrai Devin (@asrai) May 09, 2012
What hasn’t Sears sold over the years? Addiction cures, and early “powered” butter churns. via @kbowenwriter
It is okay to leave stuff out. Sometimes it’s even better.http://bit.ly/LEwhXS via @JaneFriedman
8 reasons not to quit social media when you are burned out.http://bit.ly/JPB3eK
Major editing is like renovating. http://bit.ly/LEucuX via @xandrajames
All in favor of this motion tweet #aye. Put Joss Whedon in charge of all entertainment. http://bit.ly/IAmDRM from @andrewmocete
How do you know when to give your children that next step of independence? http://bit.ly/IAmsWl @SSchroeder_
25 fresh blogging tips for everybody. http://bit.ly/IAmnlz
7 ways to gain more confidence in your creative work.http://bit.ly/JtkIyj
Making money via creative magic from @abccreativityhttp://bit.ly/JaLQDv
Body image myths and loving your body. http://bit.ly/LBbZyl via@AugstMcLaughlin
Yes, but mine already has sparkles. http://bit.ly/KzkdaR@kristenlambtx with a plan to save publishing.
Finding time for author blogging via @PassiveVoiceblghttp://bit.ly/IRoRj2 including a helpful video on how to use google reader.
I know from swapping crits with @LaraValentine1 this book is hot. i needed a cold shower.
Grand, I was researching Elder Scrolls vs Mass Effect. Now we are into spending next week's allowence. Is patience really a virtue?—
Asrai Devin (@asrai) May 08, 2012
Home made mod-podge. http://bit.ly/IW1xPe
A motivational thank you from @DanielleLaPorte http://bit.ly/IW0WNKGreat reminders in here.
Rich people suck http://wp.me/p5HGG-Mw
$1000 kitchen reno. http://bit.ly/IZ11CY Labeled unbelievable, but we did our kitchen for a few hundred at our previous house.
When should you trust your gut? http://bit.ly/IxUidA
darn you @elizabethscraig and your Twitterific links for the week. I have 10 windows open. 10!! http://bit.ly/KyPKWS
Tagged: Asrai Devin, Holly Lisle, inspriration, interspiration, Joss Whedon, links, Sears, Smashwords, Social media
May 11, 2012
Guilty Pleasures: 1Bruce1
Okay, I read every Sweet Valley High book my tiny library had. And I loved them all. I always thought Elizabeth should kick Todd to the curb. No reason, he was just kind of a pussy.
I started “blogging” on Livejournal. Remember livejournal? It’s like the playground of blogging, except it’s all about you. Anyway, despite the disuse of livejournal, I love reading the community 1Bruce1.
Remember Bruce Patman’s Porsche had the licence plate 1Bruce1? Awesome!
The community is full of recaps of the Sweet Valley books.
Like this recap of my favorite Sweet Valley High Mega-book, The Wakefields of Sweet Valley.
she thinks sadly to herself, “She was going home, but her heart would stay here. Buried with Jaques. Forever.”
1949. Marjorie is getting married to some guy called Charles Robertson. Heh. You know, that’s the second time in this book that the ghost-writer has used the joke of a girl vowing to never love again and then cutting quickly to the next chapter where she’s getting married to her new boyfriend. And yet it amused me just as much the second time as it did the first.
I remember being horrified when Regina Morrow overdosed on cocaine after Bruce broke her heart. Man, how tragic the teen years are.
Liz, ever the tattle-tale, calls Nicholas and tells him that Regina is going to be at a party with drugs. Drugs! Nicolas says he’s going to go over there and bring her home. Away from the drugs! He rushes out without his wallet and gets caught speeding. The cops bring him into the station. Jesus. For once the Sweet Valley cops actually do something and it’s to stop Nicolas Morrow from saving his sister’s life. What a crack force they have there.
Okay, not that dying from drugs is good, but seriously, well I took the whole drugs are bad seriously. To this day. Nothing to do with family issues. AT all. Now that you’ve learned your lesson this Friday, go and read some fun Sweet Valley Recaps. Or tell me which series you’d like to see recapped.
Tagged: Arts, Asrai Devin, Drug, Elizabeth Wakefield, guilty pleasures, Literature, Porsche, Sweet Valley, Sweet Valley High
May 7, 2012
Rich people suck
Rich people are easy to hate. We love to watch them on TV a la “Real Housewives”, the Bachelor, every reality show with a celebrity and every entertainment “news” show, like TMZ or E! Now.
We can watch these rich people who have the most screwed up lives you could imagine. And we can say “man, I’m glad I’m not rich, because being rich makes you have a messed up life. I’d rather be just making it and be a normal person, without all that drama going on around me. I make good life choices. And I’m a nice person. Rich people are not nice people.
When you set yourself thoughts about rich people, you have an internal number that makes people rich. An annual salary it is okay to make, a net worth it is okay to possess.
You set limits on your own prosperity with your thoughts.
It’s not just the money we set limits on. We set limits on our happiness. When we reach our internal limit of good things, we create something bad, we pick a fight or get careless and cause injury so we can bring ourself down to a place where we feel safe and happy. Gay and Kathy Hendrick’s call it the Upper Limit Problem.
When you run into the upper limit problem, you can let yourself bring your success down a few notches until you feel balanced again. Or you can fight it.
You look at what is behind your feelings and thoughts. Where did they start? Who gave you the idea? In this case, who gave you the idea that rich people suck? Parents and early experiences are often where our beliefs about the big stuff, money, relationships and work come from. According to the Hendricks, whose work I recommend you read if you are interested in digging further, anyway, according to Gay and Kathy, all our relationships are reflections of our early experiences. We actually behave in ways that get the world around us to make us feel like we did when we were four, because it’s safe there, we know how to feel and act there.
I know, it’s a little radical. Who wants to feel like they are four or five or ten again? But I have found it is very true. Just when we start go get ahead and feel like we are saving money, work slows down and hours are cut for a while and we have to spend our savings to pay bills.
The last part of the rich people suck is, choose differently. You can the first person to make a ton of money and not use it to avoid paying taxes you. You can pay your taxes and laugh at them. You can spend some of it sponsoring programs in Third World Countries. You can start a scholarship for things you wish there were a scholarship for. You can do whatever you want with your money. You can let it empower you. You can be an example.
What are you going to choose to do?
Tagged: Asrai Devin, comparisons, Health, Home, money, Real Housewives, real wealthy, Television, Wealth
