Kristin van Ogtrop's Blog, page 360
March 11, 2011
Room, Chapters 3 and 4 (Dying and After)
Thank you for your insightful comments last week. I really appreciated the points about the inconsistencies in the book regarding Jack. Rachel said: "It is strange to me how smart Jack is, but he is still so juvenile, innocent, and childish at the same time." Amy notes: "I also question how realistic it is that Jack would just accept that certain things were just TV and the things in Room are real." Jack's development--both the advancements and delays--were so interesting and surprising at times. It makes for such an interesting study, especially when you realize that this is not a complete fantasy (i.e. Jaycee Duggard, as Bella pointed out). I also think it's such a page turner, that the plot ends up whisking you quickly away to the next stage in their lives. Especially, as Nicole writes, "As I was reading I kept thinking to myself, "what is she going to do if they are still in Room in 2 years? 5 years? 10 years?" I think that point alone is what kept me reading and reading...I wanted to know what was going to happen to them. And then, in Dying, we find out.
Just when I started to get overly anxious about their claustrophobic situation, the plan is unveiled. I read through this section so fast, it now almost seems like a blur. Do you think Ma always planned to wait until Jack was 5 to use him to facilitate their escape? Jack says in the beginning of the chapter, "Before I didn't even know to be mad that we can't open Door, my head was too small to have Outside in it. When I was a little kid I thought like a little kid, but now I'm five I know everything." Do you agree? Though we now know the plan was a success, could Jack handle this? Was it worth jeopardizing Jack's life? One thing: I kept getting confused about the timing of the escape...why was the man who saved Jack walking his dog and baby late at night? Regardless, it was such a relief that he was there. But it left me thinking more about Old Nick--who is this guy? Why did he do this (besides just being a sicko)? It takes a true, methodical monster to create that shed with a keypad, let alone watch as her first baby died. Why would Ma think he would ever take Jack to the hospital?
Next, we get to After, which I found so fascinating. The bubble is broken and the transition to the Outside is too much to bear. In the Room, Ma had everything so structured and organized. Now, her lack of control is apparent. She is quick to lose patience with Jack and unprepared for the pressure of the real world--and the media's desire for sensational stories. What problems do you foresee them facing now that they're back in the world?
The chapter ends dramatically. The trip to the mall with Ma's brother Paul illuminated how long and hard this transition will be. And then, sadly, Jack finds Ma after an overdose attempt. It's interesting how this chapter flips back and forth between who needs caring for more as they transition out of isolation. If Ma makes it through, will she be able to handle raising Jack, who needs just as much attention in this new world. If she doesn't, I hate to think of what Jack's mental state will be. The plan worked, but in his mind, it would be a tragic failure without Ma around. I shudder to think of what is harder for him to handle: being locked in a Room forever or escaping and having the one person you love and trust in the world pass away.
There's one chapter left (assuming you haven't raced to the end). Let's finish up the discussion next Friday. Please continue to share your thoughts, reviews, and comments below!
Clutter Rehab: Great New Book!
Streamlined closets, a desk without endless piles of paperwork, an electronic filing system, weekly menu plans... if all of this sounds great in theory but enormously overwhelming to implement then it's time you checked yourself in to rehab for a little clutter detox! Rehab? Detox? Huh? Disorganized Debbie's and Frazzled Fiona's everywhere can pick up a copy of Clutter Rehab and start cleansing your interiors (your home at least) right away.
This compact and to-the-point book arrived in my mailbox this week and I've already read through it and started to make some changes in my own life and it really works - I'm digging out from clutter and becoming more organized in just a few days after putting some of the tips in Clutter Rehab to use. Author Laura Wittmann, who is the founder and editor of Org Junkie, is a self-proclaimed "organizing freak" who lives and works in Kitiman, BC, Canada, with her husband and children.
I must confess, usually women like Laura intimate me because I battle with staying on top of domestic tasks and home organization, so I wondered if her book would make me give up before I even got started since many organizing books, odd to say, make me feel completely stressed out. Perfect housewives can intimidate even the best of us. Laura is different. She doesn't come across as bossy, preachy, fussy, or over-the-top. I think her book will resonate with lots of Real Simple readers because the information is presented clearly and in quick bites, and her tips are very easy to implement.
Clutter Rehab can help turn a chaotic home into a well-organized, relaxed environment in no time with 101 quick solutions that have been, "tested and approved by the loyal readers of the author's popular blog." It offers a plan to tidy up rooms and take on (and manage) clutter. There are even ideas on how to make clean up fun for kids, I particularly liked the daily "walkabout" tip, which is on page 25. This is when, once daily, you let everyone know that it is, "Time For a Walkabout!" which means it's time for everyone to walk through the house and pick up anything that is stray or out of place and put it back where it belongs. My husband and I don't have children but we started doing this a few days ago and it has already worked wonders. And this is just one great tip, there are 100 more!
In addition to having 101 tips, I love its small, portable size! This book measures around 5 x 7" and has only 128 which makes it idea for tossing in your bag to read during a morning commute or in the park. I'm definitely going to finish reading it this weekend and introduce more of Laura's awesome organizing ideas in my own home.
I'm so glad I found out about Clutter Rehab -- I've officially checked in and I'm ready to cleanse my unruly closet and messy desk drawers. AND I plan to start reading Laura's blog, Org Junkie, going forward because I hadn't heard of it before and now that I know Laura through her book I'm sure I'll enjoy her blog too.
Congratulations Laura on your new book!
(image: holly becker)
A Dermatologist Answers Your Questions (Part 2)
Part two has arrived! As promised earlier this week, here are the rest of the questions that Dr. Joel Schlessinger answered for us. This portion focuses on wrinkles, acne and sunspots.
Part Two: Wrinkes, Ance and Sun Spots
Real Simple: Is there an inexpensive product (for people who are watching pennies in this bad economy) that works well at fading age and sun spots?
Dr. Schlessinger: Sunscreen! This is the least understood and most valuable tool in fading sun spots, bar none. If looking for repair, the Revision Skincare Alpha Solutionis, an 8% glycolic acid with 0.5% salicylic acid, is a great option.
To buy: $22, skin-one.com
RS: In regards to sunspots, is there something worth splurging on that is proven to work time and again?
Dr. Schlessinger: Anything that contains hydroquinone, in various strengths, is going to work. The key is to make sure to use it on an ongoing basis. The problem with most people is that they start it and then give up or never do the tough things like staying out of the sun. My favorite system is the Obagi NuDerm System Starter Kit–use alongside Retin-A for maximum benefits. It is equivalent, if not better, than lasers.
To buy: $370, lovelyskin.com
RS: Is there a product with retin-A that might be more appropriate for sensitive skin?
Dr. Schlessinger: I love the Kinerase Tretinoin product or Refissa, both of which are a kinder and gentler form of Retin A. Many dermatologists and plastic surgeons are now carrying them in their offices, where they can be significantly less expensive than traditional pharmacies for brand-name Retin-A. While there is no form of Retin-A that truly works for sensitive skin, these are in a cream and gel base that tend to be less irritating than the usual forms. If skin is sensitive, it is best to avoid retinoids as a rule.
To buy: $84, skinelite.com
RS: How long does it take for Retin-A to produce noticeable results when the desired results are a smoother complexion (ex: getting rid of mild acne scarring)?
Dr. Schlessinger: Retin-A is a very mild treatment for scarring, but it can produce benefits over months. It takes about 60 days for the skin to grow from the lowest level to the top, so I always encourage my patients to give it at least 60 days before they expect results.
RS: One of our readers is 27 and would like to know what she should be doing now to help prevent wrinkles in the future?
Dr. Schlessinger: I may sound repetitive, but the answer is to use sunscreen, stay out of the sun, and especially stay out of tanning booths. There now exists some great self-tanners, such as Jane Iredale's Tantasia, They don't smell bad and look normal. There is no reason to try to get a tan while causing wrinkles and risking skin cancer in the future.
To buy: $36,shop.janeiredale.com
RS: What is the best way to fade red marks/acne scars?
Dr. Schlessinger: These sorts of marks are often from the repetitive acne that occurs over time. I will commonly see patients who come in to fix the 'scars' of acne, but who don't realize that the first step is to actually control the acne. Without getting the acne under control, it will always be a losing battle. So the first thing to do is to get to a dermatologist to address the acne concerns. Once the acne is under control or treated effectively, then treat the scarring or marks if any remain. It never ceases to amaze me that the face has a huge resilience and ability to cure itself if given enough time and care.
For those patients who have red marks after treatments or minor scars, Intense Pulsed Light treatments can be very effective. I rarely have to resort to these if treatments are started early. The name of the game is coming in early–before scarring is permanent–to get on medications and prevent scars from forming. While laser treatments can help, they are very expensive and never have the benefits that prevention can provide.
RS: Some of our readers who are older than 40 years old expressed seeing breakout recently. Why have they suddenly begun experiencing breakouts? Specifically around the chin and lower face area.
Dr. Schlessinger: This can either be an infection or, if you are a woman, the onset of menopause. The most common reason for a sudden onset of acne is an infection and we are seeing an explosion of staph infections, some of which are the notorious MRSA (methicillin resistant staph aureus). It is a good idea to go in to a dermatologist to have this evaluated.
RS: What is the best laser or treatment for treating wrinkles and sun damage?
Dr. Schlessinger: While I like lasers and own 12 of them, I rarely use them for sun damage. Intense Pulsed Light, which is a variant of laser light, is great for brown spots and red spots/blood vessels. It can be used as an outpatient and has little or no downtime. If there is significant wrinkling on the face (outside the eyes and forehead), then the fractionated CO2 lasers can be very effective. We rarely have to use these any more as treatments now that we have great fillers like Restylane, Perlane and Juvederm, as well as Botox and Dysport for wrinkle relaxing. Much less expensive than lasers is to find a good system, like the Obagi NuDerm System.
RS: Is there anything a person with rosacea can use to exfoliate with?
Dr. Schlessinger: Rosacea patients now have a great option in the Obagi Rosaclear line, which has a gentle cleanser. The truth is that most rosacea patients need a gentle, not aggressive, cleanser. Exfoliation will only make things worse, and if there is evidence of scaling skin most likely needs to be babied not exfoliated. Many rosacea patients have a condition simultaneously known as seborrheic dermatitis, which looks like dry skin, but won't respond at all to exfoliation. It needs treatment by a dermatologist and should be addressed at the time of their appointment for rosacea.
RS: What are good products and practices for women ready to start preventing wrinkles, but still battling acne? Most treatments seem to be too thick or to put them on breakout-prone skin.
Dr. Schlessinger: I like the Obagi ElastiDerm Eye Treatment Cream and Gel for the crow's feet area (the gel is especially good if you have oily skin). Many products that help with acne will also help with wrinkles to some degree as they are all about exfoliating and turning over the layers of the skin. The LovelySkin product line has effects for both and is excellent for sun damage, with kits for both acne and wrinkles. I generally recommend using the kit (either acne care or wrinkle treatment) thataddresses the biggest issue at the time, but to a great extent they treat both conditions quite nicely.
To buy: $89, lovelyskin.com To buy: $89, lovelyskin.com
Thank you for your questions!
March 10, 2011
A New Use for a Paper Napkin Wrapper via Lifehacker
If you enjoy going out to eat with friends (and really, who doesn't?) This new use for a paper napkin wrapper from Lifehacker.
At the end of the night when you're tying to decide who owes what, use that napkin wrapper to designate how much of the bill should be charged on each card. You'll make it that much easier on your waiter, and you won't have to worry about your card being charged for the family of four you and you husband are out to dinner with.
Have any other great new uses? Share them in the comments!
Related:
How to Save on Going to the Movies
11 Money-Etiquette Issues, Solved
Wet and Wild: Coping With Night Sweats
Fact: I sweat while I sleep. Honestly, I can't count the number of times I've gone to bed with sleek, blown-out hair and woken up to damp, frazzled, kinky strands or how many morning I've found myself drenched in sweat, with sheets that are distinctly moist on my side of the bed. Not attractive, I know...but very common amongst women, and more so during certain times of the month, when hormonal variations can cause a spike in your temp.
Night sweats are also a frustrating side effect of tons of medications, and menopausal women are particularly prone to being hot under the sheets. (A 2002 study found that of nearly 2300 people who saw their doctor, 40 percent said they'd had at least ONE episode of night sweats in the prior month.)
Until I figure out a way to actually stop the perspiration—there are a clutch of herbal remedies to try—I've tried out some products that at least make the droplets less distracting or even cut down on the number of moonlit pajama changes!
Which brings me to Bamjamz! The name itself never ceases to inspire jokes and jabs from my husband—something about saying the word as a reply to "What are you wearing?" makes him laugh. But beyond that, these simple items of organic lounge-wear and sleep-wear, made of super-absorbant, super- soft bamboo fibers, are actually sort of awesome at making the sweats less disturbing! Now that I have tried them, I can't go back to my old cotton tees. The company says they actually can keep you two degrees cooler—and when it comes to one's inner thermostat, those two degrees can be the difference between drenched and dry!
Down the hall in my toddler daughter's room, it seems that she got the penchant for perspiration. She's often damp upon waking (her hair in a similar state of Einstein-esque glory) and so when Sheex sent me a new piece from their line of "performance" sheeting to test on her crib, I quickly swapped out the sheet. (I'm biting my tongue so that I don't crack a joke about "performance" sheets. This is a G-rated, "family" blog!)
Anyways, the pale-pink fitted crib sheet was soft and lustrous, especially silky compared to her standard cotton sheet, and after a few days under her clammy little body, I did notice that it didn't get as wrinkled or otherwise disturbed by her perspiration. As promised, the microfiber fabric dried super-fast, too—so when I put her back down a few hours later for her nap, there was nary a still-damp patch! WIN! (My only quibble: I wish it came in a fun pattern—in part because it disguises any small stains that accumulate during the week!)
Sheex—which was founded by two former women's college basketball coaches—also makes these super luxe sheet sets for adults in search of bedding that does more than, well, just lie there. Sure, the $200 price tag (for a queen sheet set) is admittedly quite steep, but many people spare NO expense when it comes to making their bed a sanctuary. After all, we DO spend one-third of our lives in bed, so why not? While you can already buy them online, Sheex will also hit the shelves at Bed, Bath & Beyond in the first week of April.
The Nudes Next Door
One morning a few days after we moved to a ninth floor apartment in New York City, I walked into the kitchen to find my husband staring out a window, transfixed.
It was a young couple—both of them fit models, from the looks of things—and over the next few days, as they moseyed nakedly from room to room to cook, type on computers and watch TV, I had but one thought: privacy.
"They don't seem to care about that," my husband said.
"Not for them, for us," I said.
We eventually hung a shade on that window, as well as on the others in the apartment. But when we closed the kitchen shade to block the Nude Parade, we lost the sunlight, too. As well as our (distant) view of a tiny sliver of the Hudson River.
So now we keep all the shades up, and try not to stare, remembering how Jimmy Stewart's binoculars got him into trouble in "Rear Window." But I have to admit there is something kind of mesmerizing about seeing someone vacuum in the nude.
"If it were me, I'd worry about that suction hose," my husband mused.
Sometimes I wonder, though: Who's ruder, the nudes for inflicting their nakedness on the neighbors, or me for watching?
(image via msn.com)
If my neighbors insist on parading around nude, is it OK to watch?customer surveys
March 9, 2011
The Difference Between Nonstop and Direct Flights
Did you know that nonstop flights and direct flights are not the same thing? And that one might get you there faster than the other.
While we often use them interchangeably in conversation, there's one important difference between nonstop and direct flights.
Direct flights may have stops at airports between your starting point and final destination, but you won't have to change planes.
Nonstop flights, on the other hand, are exactly what they sound like. Point A to point B with no detours in the middle. So the next time you're booking your vacation, opt for nonstop.
Did you know the difference between direct and nonstop flights? Or do you have any brilliant travel tips to share?
Related:
20 Tips from Air-Travel Insiders
How to Actually Use Your Frequent Flier Miles
A Space in Your House That Is Yours and Yours Alone
I am in the process of carving out a little home office for myself and you would think I was about to get a free trip around the world, another baby, or a Lexus with a giant bow around it in my driveway, like you see in the commercials at Christmas. I am just that excited.
Except for childhood and a brief period in my 20s, I have never had a room of my own, much less a home office. A place where the mess is only my mess, not the mess of a child or husband who—despite being wonderful in nearly every other way—never remembers to put his dishes in the sink. Back in college I read Virginia Woolf's A Room of One's Own and, honestly, didn't see what the big deal was about. Now that I work full time and have three children and a husband and a dog, there just seems to be mess everywhere I look. And I mean mess both in the literal and figurative sense. I have a messy, messy, messy life. And so I find myself having Woolfian fantasies of just walking out the door and never coming back. Do you have those fantasies? Can you have those fantasies and not end up drowning yourself in a river? I sure hope so.
So my life is a "mess," but I don't want to be a mess. (As in: "Oh, you know Kristin, she's such a mess.") And now I think I've found the ultimate anti-mess plan, which is to have my own office. The Path to Office looks like this:
Old house with no accessible attic = no place to store random crapola, which all goes in unoccupied bedroom
Old house needs to be rewired = suddenly there is a way to get into the attic
Attic needs to be insulated = attic gets a plywood floor
Plywood floor in attic = new place for random crapola
New place for random crapola = new empty room!
Now when I wake up in the night and can't fall asleep again (see my post of last week, specifically the part about our babysitter change), I think about my new little office. I think about the wallpaper I chose, back when I was silly and naïve and thought there really was no big financial difference between painting a room and wallpapering it (uh...no). I think about putting my desk under the sunny double window and opening my laptop and instead of answering e-mails, just looking out the window. The door is closed on my otherwise messy life, and I have a moment to myself in a room where everything is in its place. And I will never drown myself in a river, at least not anytime soon.
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In Search of the Elusive Work-Life Balance
If there's a book on the subject of work-life balance, or working motherhood, I've probably read it. The shelves in my home office are bursting with titles like Balance is a Crock, I Was a Really Good Mom Before I Had Kids, Good Enough Mother, and When Did I Get Like This? Yes, I read them primarily because I blog on the topic, but I'm forever on the lookout for women who feel they've unlocked the secret to achieving true work-life balance. (If you fit the bill, I want to interview you)!
And yet as much as I read, I find the most honest advice often comes from women I meet through the regular course of business. Recently, during some research I was conducting on electric vehicles, I learned that several women played integral roles in the development of the new Chevrolet Volt. I must confess, I don't know why this surprised me, but it did.
I was curious to learn how three female engineers—responsible for bringing a highly-anticipated and revolutionary new car to market—managed the demands of their work and home lives. Cristi Landy, heads product marketing for the Volt; Britta Gross is the "infrastructure" czar; and Nina Tortosa is the "lead aerodynamicist." Here's an excerpt of what they had to say.
1. Don't be afraid to take risks. It's the one thing I wish someone had told me when I first started my career. It's important to try new assignments and take on new responsibilities, even if they are outside of what you know or are comfortable with. —Cristi
2. Detach yourself from the issue. If something happens that derails my plans, or gets my day started on the wrong foot, I have found it really helps to detach myself from the issue. – Cristi
3. You don't always have to say "yes." Just as it is okay to take an hour off of work to go to the school Christmas party, it's also okay to tell the kids you can't make it to the Valentine's Day party. – Nina
4. Live your life. It took me a while to get over feeling guilty for not being at every activity, for every kid, every time. But my kids need to learn that mom has activities too, and that's okay. – Nina
5. Remember that you are good at what you do. When I have a bad day, or even a bad week, I find a great recipe to try – usually something French or Italian. And it inevitably doesn't come out at all like I imagined. That's when I'm reminded that what I do at work really matters, and I'm much better at it than at cooking. It's what gets me ready for Monday morning. – Britta
6. Unwind, at whatever cost. You have to make time for yourself. My way to unwind is by reading. Whatever I want. However long it takes. – Britta
What's the best work/life advice you've ever heard?
Read more of this interview on my blog ManicMommies.com.
March 8, 2011
Do You Have a Favorite Healthy Sweet Potato Recipe?
I love sweet potatoes, but I usually only eat them around Thanksgiving. Which is a shame, because they're incredibly delicious and nutritious (packed with vitamins A, E, and B6, along with lots of potassium, iron, and fiber) and are available year-round. So I'm really excited to be one of the judges in this year's Sweet n' Healthy Blogger Recipe Contest. The star ingredient? Sweet potatoes, of course!
Best of all, if you're a blogger with an amazing and healthy original sweet potato recipe, you can enter the contest yourself for a chance to win $2,000. There will be three categories—kid-friendly, vegetarian, and sugar-free—with a grand-prize winner in each category. I, along with a panel of other judges, will be tasting the finalists and rating them on flavor, the importance of sweet potato as the main ingredient, originality, and ease of preparation. Think of it as an Iron Chef challenge but without the frantic sprinting, profuse sweating, and down-to-the-buzzer plating.
Get the details on how to enter the contest here, and best of luck! I'm excited to see what everyone creates and even more excited to taste them all. To get myself in the mood, I think I'll make our Chili-Glazed Pork With Sweet Potato Hash recipe this week—it's been on my to-try list for a while, and it sounds really tasty (read the comments!).
Do you have a favorite way to eat sweet potatoes? I personally can't resist sweet potato fries.
(image: Tetra Images/Getty Images)
