Deborah L. McCarragher's Blog, page 17

What Body? He is Not Here! (Easter Rerun )

Imagine visiting your local cemetery and suddenly youdiscover the grave you're approaching is not only unearthed – but the coffin iswide open and empty! 
What would you think?  I suppose the first thing you'd do would beto call security – and start a search for the missing body! 
Something strange andwonderful happened outside of Jerusalem at a small burial site in the Judeancountryside over 2000 years ago.  A tombwhich was sealed the previous night was now wide open – with no one takingcredit for the monumental task.  Let meexplain…
By definition, a grave is a place for the interment ofthe dead; a tomb, a sepulcher.  In Jesus'day it was often merely a natural cave or grotto, or an artificial tomb hewnout of rock.  Many times graves wereflagged with flat stones as markers to warn passers-by that they should notcome in contact with the dead, thereby defiling themselves ceremonially, evenif it was unwittingly done.  Once thebody was laid inside, the tomb was sealed with a large stone – most likelyweighing hundreds of pounds, and taking at least two strong men to place it atthe mouth of the cave.  This was done toprevent animals from desecrating the body or thieves from removing sacreditems.  Unsealing the tomb without beingnoticed would be difficult at best. One person alone could not move the stonewithout help from some other source.
Resurrection morningoccurred on the first day of the week and Luke 24:1-12 tells us it was "very early".  The women who had been with Joseph, a councilmember who had secretly become a disciple of Jesus, entered the tomb with theprepared spices for the body of Jesus. They discovered that the Lord's body was not there – and as they stoodperplexed – two men in shining garments appeared before them.  The women, fearful and bowing down inreverence were told, "He is not here, butis risen! Remember how He spoke to you when He was still in Galilee, saying, 'The Son of Man must be delivered into the hands of sinfulmen, and be crucified, and the third day rise again".  Verse 8says, "And they remembered His words."
These women had witnessedJesus' body being placed inside the grave by Joseph and Nicodemus, who alsocame with the burial preparations, including a large amount of myrrh, aloes,spices and linen to wrap and prepare the Lord's body, as was the custom of theJews (John 19:38-42).  We know that whenJoseph of Arimathea offered to lay the body of Jesus in his own tomb carved outof the rocky hillside, he most likely considered that he would need anothertomb for his own interment.  Little didhe know that he would again be using that very tomb for himself!  Jesus would merely be borrowing the sepulcherfor three days – never again to be laid to rest, but to arise victorious anddefeat death once and for all.   What wasso special about this grave? 
When the women approachedthe tomb, they had but one concern: how would they roll away the large stonethat blocked the entrance into the cave? But as they looked up – the stone had already been moved, and uponentering the tomb, they saw a young man clothed in a long white robe sitting onthe right side.  And he said to them, "Do not be alarmed. You seek Jesus ofNazareth, who was crucified.  He isrisen!  He is not here. See the placewhere they laid Him."
There was no need for thestone – Christ simply stepped into heaven and left earth's grip…
Charles Wesley penned thisstirring hymn which is sung in many churches on Easter morning:
          Christ theLord is risen today, Alleluia!           Sons of menand angels say, Alleluia!           Raise yourjoys and triumphs high, Alleluia!Sing, yeheavens, and earth reply, Alleluia!
Lives againour glorious King, Alleluia!Where, Odeath is now thy sting? Alleluia!Once He died,our souls to save, Alleluia!Where's thyvictory, boasting grave? Alleluia!
Love'sredeeming work is done, Alleluia!Fought thefight, the battle won. Alleluia!Death in vainforbids Him rise, Alleluia!Christ hathopened paradise, Alleluia!
Soar we nowwhere Christ has led, Alleluia!Following ourexalted Head, Alleluia!Made likeHim, like Him we rise, Alleluia!Ours thecross, the grave, the skies, Alleluia!







Deborah is the author of a Christiannon-fiction book titled "MissionPossible".  It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but theirspouse doesn't share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge thereader to embrace God's promises for their spouse and future together. Visit http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

Compliant Colt and Screaming Stones - Who Is This Jesus?

"Tell the daughter of Zion, 'Behold, your King is coming to you, lowly, and sitting on a donkey, a colt, the foal of a donkey.'"  (Zechariah 9:9)

The two disciples thought they heard Jesus correctly: "Go into the village opposite you, and immediately you will find a donkey tied, and a colt with her. Loose them and bring them to Me. And if anyone says anything to you; you shall say, 'The Lord has need of them.' and immediately he will send them."

As they approached the village, they looked at each other with that look... the one they've used before - as if to say, "are you thinking what I'm thinking?"  As they turned onto the street, sure enough, there was the colt - tied up outside by the door, just as He said.  As they begun to untie the colt, the owners approached them and said, "Why are you loosing the colt?" 

Then they both chimed in saying, "The Lord has need of him."  They held their collective breath until the owner finally nodded in their direction.  They carefully led the animal down the dusty, uneven path out to where the Lord was.  First one, then the other laid their garments on the beast as a befitting gesture to the Lord.  He mounted the compliant colt and rode slowly towards Jerusalem.

Many onlookers began spreading their garments on the road, and others cut down leafy branches from the palm trees that shaded the crowd from the glaring sun.  By now a great multitude had gathered; some following from behind and some went ahead of Jesus, crying out, "Hosanna to the Son of David! Blessed is He who comes in the name of the LORD!  Peace in heaven and glory in the highest!"

The King of Kings was entering the Holy City on a lowly donkey...  There was no white stallion or blazing chariot for this royal ruler.  No - this was a servant King who chose to humble Himself and give the glory to His Father.  As his disciples began to rejoice with the people, praising in loud voices for all of the mighty works they had witnessed, there were those who were less than impressed.

Some of the Pharisees called out to Him from the crowd saying, "Teacher, rebuke Your disciples."  Their rising discomfort had more to do with their self-righteous attitudes and pious indignity than it did with genuine concern.  Jesus said to them, "I tell you that if these should keep silent, the stones would immediately cry out."

[Key passages shared are Matthew 21:1-10 , Mark 11:1-10 , Luke 19:28-40 , John 13:12-15]
The donkey no doubt had an "aroma" about him as they headed down the bumpy pathway. However, there is a sweet fragrance that rises up to the Father as prayers, praises and testimonies all make their way through the throngs of humanity.  As the Apostle Paul so eloquently states in II Corinthians 2:14-15 , "But thanks be to God, Who in Christ always leads us in triumph [as trophies of Christ's victory] and through us spreads and makes evident the fragrance of the knowledge of God everywhere. For we are the sweet fragrance of Christ [which exhales] unto God, [discernible alike] among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing..."  (The Message)

Today, as in the times of old, there are many who do not recognize His Deity. 

They marvel at His works and embrace His teachings.  They acknowledge His wisdom and admire his morals, but there are still observers who ask, "Who is this Jesus?"  During this Easter season think about what you believe and how you might share it with others. Do you have a special Scripture reference? What is your answer for the hope that lies within you? (I Peter 3:15-16)








Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled"Mission Possible".  It is written forwomen who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn't share theirpassion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God'spromises for their spouse and future together.  Visit http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com


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Do You Wish Your Husband Would Drop Dead?

I know what you're thinking... "What did she just ask?"   

I became a Christian seven years into our marriage.  I was thirty-three years old at the time.   I was a new creature in Christ, with new interests and new desires.  I was increasingly more and more unhappy about my situation at home. I became somewhat unsettled in my new found faith.  But God stopped my flawed thinking and convicted me of what I was plotting... (no - not murder).  I just was day-dreaming about a change. Instead of wishing for a "new husband" by ditching my current one, I believe God told me - I would get a new husband with the same man !  

WOW - that was sure freeing for me as I struggled with the day to day tussles in a spiritually mismatched household.

The Biblical story of Abigail and King David is a classic.  Here's a little history lesson:

After King David had commanded several successful military campaigns, he mercifully spared King Saul's life in a cave in the region of En Gedi.  David then journeyed into the wilderness of Paran following Samuel's death and burial. Samuel had, under God's direction, chosen and anointed David as the future King of Israel.

By this time David had already taken Saul's daughter Michal as his wife; a gift from the King to David for a crushing defeat of the Philistines in exchange for his bride's dowry, as vengeance on the King's enemies. David and his men were in the wilderness when he heard that a man in Carmel named Nabel, whose sheep were being sheared, might have provisions for him and his young warriors (I Samuel 21-24).

Below is an excerpt from  MISSION POSSIBLE - Chapter 4   "The Abigail Syndrome".   
Mission Possible is a book for women living in an unequally-yoked marriage. It offers the reader hope and encouragement using God's Word and applying Biblical truths. 
The traditional story of "Abigail" in I Samuel 25 is a familiar one. Abigail was married to Nabal, a man of means who treated her and everyone else like dirt. Though Nabal was descended from Caleb, he shared none of his virtues.  When King David heard that her husband Nabal reviled his men, he was ready to kill him and his household. Abigail went out to meet David with humility and gifts. David highly praised Abigail's courage and advice. Nabal soon died upon hearing what took place after his drunken binge. Abigail became David's wife when he proposed after learning of Nabal's fate. Abigail would now reside with the King in a "fairy tale" ending.

Not so fast… Don't be "caught up" in the Abigail syndrome. I believe God has a New Testament application for those of us who stand in the gap for our unbelieving husbands. Let's look at what this passage does not represent: 
We don't pray that our husbands will "drop dead" so we can marry a believer as that would not be in God's perfect will for us. Neither do we hope he'll die from a heart attack to "pay him back" for his evil ways. God has a better plan. I believe this would be the God honoring scenario for the wife who believes for her husband's salvation.

Abigail was a woman of good understanding. (I Samuel 25:3). Godly wisdom and understanding promote knowing God's will . Isaiah 11:2 is a picture of the Holy Spirit for us today:  "The Spirit of the Lord shall rest upon [us], the Spirit of wisdom and understanding, the Spirit of counsel and might, the Spirit of knowledge and the fear of the Lord." We must be in tune with what God would have us do with regards to our mate. Daily prayer and being in God'sWord helps us to know God's will.

Interestingly, when David sent his men to ask favor and provision from Nabal, he was indifferent and inquired: "Who is David, and who is the son of Jesse?…Shall I then take my bread and my water and my meat … and give it to men when I do not know where they are from?" (I Samuel 25:10-11). Likewise, your husband, just as Nabal, doesn't know the King yet.

Often times it is difficult to tithe, attend every church service, or be at every Bible study or function because your husband doesn't see a need for you to participate or share you with God. Be patient. He must see your commitment and desire to be with God's people and in God's presence.

Nabal was a self-made man who was very prideful and greedy. Reading Jesus' parable of the rich fool in Luke 12:16-20, we see similarities.  Nabal was not thankful for anything, nor recognized God's hand of provision at all. Your husband may be "rich and full of worldly things." His equating "good things & provision" to GOD are foreign. Only GOD can change his heart and priorities as you pray for his spiritual enlightenment (Ephesians 1:18). Pray for God to woo him by His Spirit into a curiosity and awareness of the things of God. 

Unlike King David who planned to wipe out Nabal's lineage, God has compassion and mercy on our spouses. He is "not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance" (II Peter 3:9). God wills that your spouse join you in "holy union." The apostle Paul states in I Corinthians 7:14, 16 "for the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife …for how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband?" 
When Abigail heard what Nabal had done, she quickly prepared an offering for King David. Our offering brought to our King is a humble heart, a willing & submissive spirit, and unwavering obedience. We intercede on our husband's behalf by meeting the King of Kings.
King David praised Abigail for her good sense and devotion:  "Blessed be the Lord God of Israel, who sent you this day to meet me! And blessed is your advice and blessed are you , because you have kept me this day from coming to bloodshed… unless you had hastened and come to meet me, surely by morning light no males would have been left to Nabal" (I Samuel 25:32-34). David would have wiped out Nabal's name but it was God's desire to "promote a Godly lineage." Abigail's actions and attitude spared Nabal but Nabal didn't recognize her sacrifice. Our sacrifice on our spouse's behalf is unwavering faith and persistent prayers offered up to the Throne of Grace. GOD always takes notice of devotion!
 God cherishes the soul we carry to Him in love when it's "one flesh" we seek.






Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled"Mission Possible".  It is written forwomen who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn't share theirpassion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God'spromises for their spouse and future together.  Visit http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com
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Did Someone Say "Work"?

WORK -  Theword itself conjures up sweat, time & effort. 
Webster in part defineswork as:  sustained physical or mentaleffort to overcome obstacles and achieve an objective or result.
Work is hard.  Work is...well, work! Marriage demands time and effort. Based on the definition above, what exactly is ourobjective or desired result?  Accordingto God's Word it is unity, honor, edification, submission to authority, spiritual fruit-bearingand unconditional love   (I Peter, I Corinthians and Ephesians). 
Often when we enterinto marriage we come with preconceived ideas about what it should look like.   Sometimes we have high expectations.  We often drag our over-stuffedbaggage into our marriage and begin to unpack it.  We just aren't realistic aboutwhat a healthy God-patterned marriage should look like. It can be devastating, in an unequally-yoked marriage, if you don't grasp the biblical teachingconcerning your role as a believer in your union.  God's standards are high - but attainable.  Work is definitely involved if you want good results.
Back to the basics wego.  First, there needs to be unity inthe marriage.  This can be difficult ifonly one spouse loves and serves the Lord. You must be in unity with Christ first, and then you can be in unity with yourspouse in the areas of your marriage that don't contradict God's Word.  Be at peace with everyone as much as dependson you (Romans 12:18).  Paul addressedthe first-century church no different than he would today: submit to oneanother in love .  Ephesians 4:1-3 says,"I, therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you to have a walk worthy ofthe calling with which you were called, with all lowliness and gentleness, withlongsuffering, bearing with one another in love, endeavoring to keep the unityof the Spirit in the bond of peace."
Submission is such amisunderstood word in the church, especially for women.   Godly submission is taught in the book ofEphesians and in the book of Romans, and its premise is demonstrated throughoutthe Bible.  Christ is the Head [of theChurch] and ideally the husband is submitted to His authority.  The wife is to be submitted to her husband in the Lord.   We all submit to some form of authority inour lives.  We begin by submitting to ourparents, then teachers, law-enforcement, government, employers, church leaders,and others in society.  Submission is best illustratedin John chapter 17 as Jesus prayed for Himself and submitted to His Father's will. 
We will exhibitspiritual fruit-bearing, worthy of the Lord, when we dig our roots deep intoGod's Word and cultivate the soil of our hearts with His Spirit.  Galatians 5:16-18 tells us to "walk in theSpirit, and you will not fulfill the lust of the flesh."  When we live a Spirit-filled life, we willdisplay the fruits of love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness,gentleness, and self-control . This fruit-bearing should set us apart from thoseliving in the world system.  AsChristians, we need to display behavior that is God honoring and exemplifiesChrist's qualities that drew so many people unto Himself.
Finally, loving yourspouse isn't a feeling – it's a commitment to do what is right.   God loved us "while we were yet sinners" anddied for us (Romans 5:8).  We must loveour spouses as Christ loves us without preconditions. You don't need a "litmus test" to seeif they are worthy of our affections or not. Love is the greatest of all virtues and does not fail.   I Corinthians 13:4-7 tells us, "Lovesuffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, isnot puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinksno evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears allthings, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things."  
 Love is something that we purpose in ourheart to do for a lifetime. Our marriage partner deserves our love regardless of what societytells us in movies, TV shows, or in the public square.  We are obligated to "flesh out the love" Godhas for us, to our spouses in a tangible way – day by day.  
How do you make your marriage work for you instead of against you?  Study and show yourself approved by putting into practice what Scripture teaches (II Timothy 2:15).  Make a decision to conquer the obstacles that stand in your way of achieving a Godly marriage - one step at a time.







 Deborah is theauthor of a Christian non-fiction book titled "Mission Possible".  It is written for women who love the LordJesus, but their spouse doesn't share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader toembrace God's promises for their spouse and future together.  Visithttp://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com
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Springtime means new growth - are you growing?

Rebirth - Renewal - Regrowth
I love spring anywhere, but if I could choose I would always greet it in a garden.  ~Ruth Stout
And Spring arose on the garden fair,
Like the Spirit of Love felt everywhere;
And each flower and herb on Earth's dark breast rose from the dreams of its wintry rest.   ~Percy Bysshe Shelley, 
"The Sensitive Plant"
I think that no matter how old or infirm I may become, I will always plant a large garden in the spring.  Who can resist the feelings of hope and joy that one gets from participating in nature's rebirth?  ~Edward Giobbi
Springtime is nearly here and seasons change according to plan...

Then God said, "Let there be lights in the firmament of the heavens to divide the day from the night; and let them be for signs and seasons, and for days and years..."  (Genesis 1:14)


"To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven:A time to be born,  And a time to die;  A time to plant,  And a time to pluck what is planted"   (Ecclesiastes 3:1-2)
Gardening has always been a favorite past-time for hobby enthusiasts.  Whether it's vegetables or flowers - a considerable amount of time and effort must go into gardening in order to reap its bountiful rewards.

 Gardening 101:  Soil, Seeds, Water, Sun and Weeds.

~  Soil   needs to be tilled (turned over) to aerate and loosen up.  You can analyze for proper ph and determine whether critical nutrients are present or not.  Using compost, manure or rich organic top soil will improve the soil's makeup and maximize growing conditions.

~  Planting  seeds and seedlings   properly help guarantee a bounty of vegetables or flowers.  Plant seeds at the recommended depth and spacing per seed packet instructions. When working with seedlings, a "gentle touch" is what is needed.  Be careful not to break off new shoots or delicate roots.

~  Watering   should be light and consistent with new plantings. Once plants are established, watering less is actually better as it forces roots deeper, resulting in stronger plants.

~  Sunlight   is crucial to plant growth and the process of photosynthesis.  Six to eight hours of direct sunlight is optimal.  Some vegetables and flowers require less, or prefer significant shade.  Carefully follow directions on packets or seedling trays before planting.

~  Weed   little, but often.  Keeping up with small weeds is easier than trying to weed a massive quantity at one time.  Mulch, grass, leaves or hay also retard weed growth.

These are just some of the basics of gardening.  For more information, or a listing of dates for your gardening zone, visit the Gardening page on  The Old Farmer's Almanac

God's Word contains many Scripture passages pertaining to sowing and reaping, seasons, planting and harvesting.  Some of them speak of nature, and some speak of spiritual things.  Either way - these universal principles apply.

Galatians 6:7-9 says, "Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap.  For he who sows to his flesh will of the flesh reap corruption, but he who sows to the Spirit will of the Spirit reap everlasting life.  And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart."

Regarding wisdom in business - Solomon tells us in Ecclesiastes 11: 4, "He who observes the wind will not sow, and he who regards the clouds will not reap."  Verse 6, "In the morning sow your seed, and in the evening do not withhold your hand; for you do not know which will prosper, either this or that, or whether both alike will be good."

In Matthew 13:1-23 Jesus tells the parable of the soils.  He spoke about the seed that was sown  and where it fell.  Then He explained to his disciples what the parable meant, ending with the statement, "But he who received seed on the good ground is he who hears the word and understands it, who indeed bears fruit and produces: some a hundredfold, some sixty, some thirty."

The Apostle Paul shares with us in II Corinthians 9:6 the principle of giving: "But this I say: He who sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and he who sows bountifully will also reap bountifully."

Paul later shares, "Now may He who supplies seed to the sower, and bread for food, supply and multiply the seed you have sown and increase the fruits of your righteousness, while you are enriched in everything for all liberality, which causes thanksgiving through us to God."  (II Corinthians 9:10-11)

Finally, in Isaiah 61:11 the prophet foretells the coming of the Messiah, "For as the earth brings forth its bud, as the garden causes the things that are sown in it to spring forth, so the Lord God will cause righteousness and praise to spring forth before all the nations."

What is your favorite thing to do in your garden?  What are your most cherished flowers?  Do you have a vegetable garden, and what do you grow?  How does spending time in your garden renew or restore your soul?

Enjoy Anne Murray singing  " In the Garden

Read an E-Book Week - March 4th-10th - Start Reading!

Read an E-Book Week's Origins HistoryRead an E-Book Week was first registered with Chase's Calendar of Events in 2004. Chase's is a day by day directory of special days, weeks and months used by event planners or anyone looking for a reason to celebrate. By having the week officially recognized, e-book authors and publishers acquired a certain extra "legitimacy" during that week to promote the new technology of e-books. The public and media were initially wary of e-books and many doors were closed to promotion. With the week officially recognized by Chase's, authors reported they now had access to television morning chat shows and were allowed to set up library displays during the week-long event. 
PurposeRead an E-Book Week educates and informs the public about the pleasures and advantages of reading electronically. Authors, publishers, vendors, the media and readers world-wide are welcome to join in the effort. We encourage you to promote electronic reading with any event. These could include: public readings, library displays, reading challenges, school visits, newspaper and blog articles, chat show appearances, internet radio interviews, e-book give-ways, and banners on your website.   [information provided by E-Book Week ]

Smashwords is one of the sponsors of Read an E-Book Week . This is the 4th year they have taken part in this special event.

Smashwords is an ebook publishing and distribution platform for ebook authors, publishers, agents and readers. They offer multi-format, DRM-free ebooks, ready for immediate sampling and purchase, and readable on any e-reading device.

For readers , Smashwords provides an opportunity to discover new voices in all categories and genres of the written word: Fiction and Non-Fiction.  Once you register, the site offers useful tools for search, discovery and personal library-building. 

At Smashwords, authors and publishers have complete control over the sampling, pricing and marketing of their written works. It is ideal for publishing novels, short fiction, poetry, personal memoirs, monographs, non-fiction, research reports, essays, or other written forms that haven't even been invented yet. It's free to publish and distribute with Smashwords.   [information provided by Smashwords .com]


During Read an E-Book Week , Smashwords authors offer their books at a discount of up to 100% during the week of March 4th - 10th.  The promotion begins at  12:01am (PST) on March 4th.

The participating authors will be featured on the Home Page Catalog. A special coupon code will allow purchasers to buy a book at the featured discount set by the author.


My book,  Mission Possible will be one of the featured e-books in the Read an E-Book Week event.  I have discounted my book 75% (down from $3.99 to $1.00) for the entire week, starting March 4th.

You can visit my author page on Smashwords here:
http://www.smashwords.com/profile/vie... 

Come support indie book authors and their works!  Visit Smashwords today - you just might just discover the next great novel, self-help book, or children's tale.


One benefit of buying a book on Smashwords is you can "choose" which E-book format you would like to download (i.e. Epub, Mobi, Kindle, pdf, etc.). 

With the variety of E-Readers available out there, you can enjoy reading your favorite book in no time.  If you already have a Kindle, Nook, or i-Pad -  Smashwords has an E-book ready for download. 

Remember - Read an E-Book Week runs from March 4th - 10th.  Get reading today!








Deborah is theauthor of a Christian non-fiction book titled "Mission Possible".  It is written for women who love the LordJesus, but their spouse doesn't share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader toembrace God's promises for their spouse and future together.  Visit http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

Do You Make Others "Beg" for Forgiveness?

You might not do it verbally.  You might not even mean to - but your actions say it loud and clear.  You might as well tell them to get down on one knee and start begging...
Forgiveness is one of those words we just look at and squirm a little.  You might have a history of "hurts" in your marriage or in your family that just keeps getting in the way of real progress towards forgiveness.  Things said and done during heated discussions.  A forgotten birthday or anniversary.  A bad business decision or a regret over financial mishaps in your marriage can produce an unforgiving spirit. How about betrayal or lying?  What do you do with repeated anger, resentment, and yes - even hatred?


To better understand forgiveness, lets look at its root definition:  to cease to feel resentment against an offender; to pardon .  We have to understand it from God's perspective (Psalm 86:5). When God forgives, it's for good.  It's complete. It's final.  It's gone with no trace of having ever been there (Isaiah 43:25). No dredging up the past; no looking for leftovers, and nothing to retrieve from the hard drive. Zero - Zip!

Can you and I forgive that way?  No - not in our own strength or by our own volition. We can only forgive as Christ does when He lives in our hearts and works in our lives.  As believers, we have been freed from the bondage that unforgiving can cause. Because of Christ we can forgive.  He exhibited the ultimate forgiveness when He hung on the cross for our sins. He purchased our right to be forgiven and modeled forgiveness (Luke 23:34). 


In II Corinthians 2:6-8 the Apostle Paul instructed the Corinthians to forgive someone who has caused grief due to their sin against fellow believers.  His point was to forgive him so that he would not be overcome with too much sorrow, and thus not be received again back into fellowship with God, and ultimately once again within the church.  In marriage, to forgive is to restore hope, and that is essential in moving past the hurt.


You give up the right to your own hurt and disappointment when you forgive someone. You give yourself permission to move on - to release them and the offense.  Healing can take place in a relationship when you both move from bitterness to forgiveness.   

Love and trust can be restored where forgiveness is cherished and pardon is practiced.  

So, how do you keep on forgiving when you're faced with attending a repeat performance year after year?  Can't you just get past it already?  Why do we keep holding on to the same bad memories and heartaches, as though they provide some sort of sadistic satisfaction or revenge?  
Jesus told his disciples in Matthew 18:21-22 to not even consider how many times to forgive, but to have a genuine heartfelt spirit of forgiveness towards others without preconceived parameters.  In other words, keep on forgiving as your heavenly Father extends His mercy towards you. 
Please don't misunderstand me -  I don't condone spousal abuse or mental cruelty, but oftentimes we do have to extend grace far beyond what we would like to.  

Forgiveness is one of those things that takes on a life of itself;  when we walk in the Spirit - we have a supernatural ability from God to practice it in reality.
I personally like to try to live each day as a brand new opportunity, to put behind me the things that I have already forgiven, and move forward with a clean slate. I refuse to let Satan wreck havoc in my marriage where it isn't even warranted.  I have enough to deal with without opening the door to more misunderstandings and misconceptions in our relationship.
 In closing - I'll share these nuggets:
Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. The Apostle Paul (Ephesians 4:32)  
He who cannot forgive breaks the bridge over which he himself must pass.  ~ George Herbert 
"I can forgive, but I cannot forget," is only another way of sayings, "I will not forgive."  ~ Anonymous
A Christian will find it cheaper to pardon than to resent.  Forgiveness saves the expense of anger, the cost of hatred, the waste of spirits.  ~ Hannah More
Never does the human soul appear so strong and noble as when it forgoes revenge and dares to forgive an injury.  ~ E.H. Chapin


 

  Deborah is theauthor of a Christian non-fiction book titled "Mission Possible".  It is written for women who love the LordJesus, but their spouse doesn't share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader toembrace God's promises for their spouse and future together.  Visit http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

** For those ofyou who receive this blog post by Email– please follow the "link" to the actual blog post in order to viewadditional information and features including multi-media options. **

Anger Management God's Way

Why can't you act civil?  Don't talk to me that way! Didn't you hear what I said?  I'm not yelling... I'm making a point!
How often do conversations and remarks get out of hand at your house?   If you're in a spiritually uneven marriage things can escalate rapidly.  What happens when you just don't see eye to eye?  I don't necessarily expect you to answer me - but I do know one thing... we all lose our tempers and react instead of acting with self-control.

Anger is a menacing thing - it simmers and stews and boils over .  It produces toxic poisons that seep into a relationship unless you take measures to stop it. There are many Scriptures concerning anger. Here's a sampling of them:

It is better to be slow-tempered than famous; it is better to have self-control than to control an army. ~Solomon (Proverbs 16:32)
A man without self-control is as defenseless as a city with broken-down walls.  ~Solomon (Proverbs 25:28)
A rebel shouts in anger; a wise man holds his temper in and cools it.  ~Solomon (Proverbs 29:11)
Self-control means controlling the tongue! A quick retort can ruin everything.   ~Solomon (Proverbs 13:3)
A wise man controls his temper. He knows that anger causes mistakes.  ~Solomon (Proverbs 14:29)
A soft answer turns away wrath, but harsh words cause quarrels.  ~Solomon (Proverbs 15:1)
If you are angry, don't sin by nursing your grudge. Don't let the sun to down with you still angry - get over it quickly;  for when you are angry you give a mighty foothold to the devil.  ~Apostle Paul (Ephesians 4:26-27)

Stop being mean, bad-tempered and angry. Quarreling, harsh words, and dislike of others should have no place in your lives.  ~Apostle Paul (Ephesians 4:31)
(All Scripture quoted is from The Living Bible - TLB)

Whether you are in a Christian marriage or in an unequally-yoked marriage , if you are a child of the King, you possess a different set of anger management skills than a non-believer.  God has equipped you with Spiritual sensitivity and an important component of your fruit of the Spirit; namely self-control .  

The Apostle Paul lists self-control last in the fruit array - but certainly not least (Galatians 5:22-23).  This particular quality enables the believer to mentally "pause in the heavenlies" before acting out in the flesh.  Christ in us provides us with a check in our Spirit man and the power to overcome our flesh in a time of weakness. Simon Peter writes in his epistle about our growth in the Lord, citing self-control as one of the keys to being fruitful in your walk in and in the knowledge of Jesus Christ (II Peter 1:5-8).

 So - what do you intend to do with your your anger?  How about no retaliation?  How about bury it in the sea of forgetfulness?  How about trading it in for constraint? 


Below is an excerpt from Mission Possible - Chapter 4 ~ Painful Reality

 "Many times, in discouragement I would say, "God, I can't do this anymore; I'm too tired."  Then I would hear God speak to my heart, "Yes, I know you are...just rest in Me and leave this at My altar.  My grace is sufficient for you...My strength is made perfect in your weakness" (II Corinthians 12:9).  He would say "Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden [weary], and I will give you rest" (Matthew 11:28). Verse 29 specifically says "rest for your souls." 

When you are weary from the battle and tired of the struggles in your marriage, what Bible verse brings you guidance and comfort?









 Deborah is theauthor of a Christian non-fiction book titled "Mission Possible".  It is written for women who love the LordJesus, but their spouse doesn't share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader toembrace God's promises for their spouse and future together.  Visit http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com  

Valentine's Day - Do You Have That "Loving Feeling"?

Love is in the air... 
But is it in your marriage?  Do you demonstrate your love to your husband in the little things you do?  Does he see your love in action - even in the private moments?
Ephesians 5 commands us to walk in love towards one another. Paul was teaching on submitting to one another in the fear of God (verse 21). Husbands are admonished to love their wives just as Christ loved the church. The great mystery Paul talks about not only has to do with the "leaving and cleaving" in a physical union between and man and woman, but also of Christ and His Church. We leave the world and cleave unto Him.

When we marry, we forsake all others for our husband. We are his alone. Just as Israel played the harlot and was unfaithful to God, we too can become "unfaithful" in our marriage concerning our allegiance to our spouse. Our husband is our gift from above – our  completer , not our competitor. God wants our focus to be on our mate and our marriage. 

Paul's last point in Ephesians 5 is, "Let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband."   This is the point:  women generally have no problem " loving " – but they often have difficulty "respecting" their husband. Honor and respect goes a long way in forging a lasting and healthy relationship. This applies whether you are both Christians, or if you are unequally-yoked in your marriage. God wills that the wife love and respect her husband.

The message that was given to the church at Ephesus in the book of Revelation was to the point and quite startling.  Jesus acknowledged their works, labor, patience and endurance. He commended their perseverance, but He also reprimanded them for one important thing:  they left their first love.  He told them to repent and do the first works.  

That got me to thinking...  If you don't abandon your first Love, you won't abandon your second love (your spouse).  Christ is the key to loving your husband in a way that brings glory to God.


God sent us a Valentine in Jesus...
He demonstrated His own love toward me, that while I was still a sinner, Christ died for me (Romans 5:8).
For God so loved the world (me) that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believed in Him would not perish, but have everlasting life (John 3:16).   Behold, what manner of love the Father has bestowed on me, that I should be called a child of God (I John 3:1).
By this I know love, because He laid down His life for me (I John 3:16).


Love Is In The Air -  (this will take you back a few years! - Disco style)




Show some love... I shared this list on my  Anniversary Blog Post  (January 2nd 2012)

"30Things I Love Most About My Husband"
FunnyRomanticGenerous            CarefulSacrificialOrganizedMindful  (etc...)


Finally - share with me your thoughts on love...

What verse do you claim when you're not  "feeling the love" ?
What verse gives you the grace to love like Christ does in your marriage?



 



Deborah is theauthor of a Christian non-fiction book titled "Mission Possible".  It is written for women who love the LordJesus, but their spouse doesn't share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader toembrace God's promises for their spouse and future together.  Visit

http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

Valentine's Day Giveaway Winner Announced (Now Closed)

And the winner is ~

Thank you for your participation in the Valentine's Day Giveaway.  There has been wonderful, insightful sharing here!

Choosing a winner is never easy - I appreciate your heartfelt answers to the questions posed to you.  That being said, reading the diverse comments and variety of answers was encouraging and comforting!


Okay -  drum roll please...
The winner of the Valentine's Day Giveaway is
 Mary Ann Jacob
Mary Ann - please email me or reply to your post so I can send you the Giveaway package!

            


Because all of the participants showed "courage" in answering the questions, and shared from the depth of their hearts - I'd like to offer each of you a Free Download of my book "Mission Possible" (ebook format of your choice) from Smashwords.  Just email me at  deb@alabasterboxpublishing.com , and put "Valentine's Day Giveaway" in the Subject Line. 

Thank you all again for visiting my blog God Mission Possible .  You are special to me and the Lord...