Aleksandr Voinov's Blog: Letters from the Front, page 33

Call me Eagle Eyes

Friday I had LASIK - Wavefront-guided, because they promised me that my view might end up better than "good", so I figured what's good enough for snipers and astronauts is sure good enough for me.

One day after the operation (and the day *of* to operation was essentially a write-off), my vision was better than 20/20. One eye lags a bit, but the other more than compensates. I'm on a "three different eyedrops, four times a day" regime, and one of those drops need to be kept in the fridge (putting fridge-cold stuff in your eye is... special). But so far I'm following all the orders.

Things are still healing, and I have the "halo" effect, which means that sources of light blur in the darkness - but I'm not nightblind (another possible outcome post-operation), and I don't have "ghosts". However, my short-range vision (the area from here to the computer screen) is a bit hazy. Apparently that'll fix itself once the brain has recovered from the shock of no longer dealing with short-sighted eyes. Also, my ability to focus fluctuates a bit. Sometimes, things are clear, then they are hazy again. But the far distance is great, so I'm perfectly entertained looking out of the window, noticing all the little details.

It'll take a few weeks or even months for the eyes to completely heal, but I'm in no rush. I can write, I can work, my eyes just heal at their own time. So far, money very, very well spent.

On the writing front, I'm making good progress on the boxer story, which is more than 30k now and might just turn out to be 40-50k. Writers not updating their blogs means they are writing more stories.

Congratulations to Stevie Carroll

I just got this email:

"I found out today that the winner of this year's James Tiptree, Jr. Literary Award has been announced over at http://tiptree.org/, as well as those books that made it to the Honor List and the Long List.

And look what's on the long list: Stevie Carroll, "The Monitors" (Echoes of Possibilities, edited by Aleksandr Voinov, Noble Romance Publishing 2010). Much thanks to Jill and to Aleks for having faith in my story. I'm still writing: I just tend towards longer stories in general and they take a while when you're as much of a perfectionist as I am.

I am seriously chuffed that my little piece of SF erotica made it so far in such a big award, against stories from the big publishers.

My story, 'The Monitors', in Echoes of Possibilities isn't exactly your standard m/f erotic romance. Here's the blurb so you can see why:

Echoes of Possibilities: Four unconventional m/f erotic romances set in very different futures. Including a trans character, a cyborg, an alien, a female ex-president of the United States and their equally remarkable lovers."


Congratulations, Stevie. I loved the story and hope it gets all the sales it deserves.

Finding sea shells and running dogs

I'm in the happy place. The place they call "Flow". It's a mystical place where words just appear on the screen, and you write 3,100 words a day (like I did yesterday). My brain's vision has narrowed to the world of Nathaniel and Brook, and no excuses.

I don't see anything else, I don't really care about anything else (what, they are talking openly about assassinating Quaddafi - who cares?). I'm swept up in the irresistible force that is a New Book in Full Swing. This - when the book just flows through you from somewhere and goes somewhere, leaving traces of black on white as it passes, it the Best Thing Ever. It's the closest to a mystical experience I ever get. Minus a few creepy moments...but that might be for a different blog post.

Authors love sharing. I do. I love talking about the new book, I love sending people my various WIPs. There are some people that think that I do so to show off. ("Look how awesome I am, I've written MORE WORDS THAN YOU YESTERDAY!") Others don't know how to respond. If I send them the current WIP - what do I want from them? Feedback? Praise?

The thing is, none of these are true. I share with other writers because they are my friends (and it's not a competition - anybody entering a competition with me is like a kid racing a dog to "win". The dog just runs for the fun of it, which is exactly why I write. I write to write, not to compete).

I share with my friends and some readers because I'm all excited myself. I'm walking along this beach and there's this beautiful seashell. It's unique, and it's all mine, and I'm full of a sense of wonder and I'm like "wow, look what I found". It's not about my ego, it is, really, about that sea shell. I used to need the praise and ego-stroking, but I'm big now, and I get my self worth from myself. I've gotten most of my ego out of the way, really. I still read my reviews, maybe twice a month, and a good review is great, but none of that has any bearings on looking for and finding the sea shells.

No feedback, no one-star review, no snide remark can get to me when I hit the Flow (or rather, it hits me). The story demands it's written. Nobody can pay me to write, nobody can pay me not to write. No amount of praise or jiggling will get me to write anything long if I'm not feeling it.

So, yeah, the boxer story has reached that critical momentum now at 26k where nothing I could do would stop it. Where I'm racing time because I'll have the LASIK procedure on Friday and fully expect to be blind all weekend and in pain, and part of me wants to push the story out before I lose my sight, if even for a few hours. Getting interrupted in my Flow is really tough. But there's no way I can write the remaining 20k in three days.

As to LASIK itself, I'll just face in head-on. I'm nervous about it, but by comparison, I assume going to the dentist for something major is by far worse. And then it's sorted for the rest of my life.

Meanwhile, I'm "eating miles", as the adapted German expression goes. Just getting out as many words as I can, while I can. Work at work is slow again today, so I may at least manage another thousand words or so.

No, I'm not serving the wank & Scorpion news

There was a rather
With fans like these, who needs an enemy?

But that's not why I'm here. I have the blurb for Scorpion. This was re-written about four times and the collaborative effort of seven people.

-------------------------------------------------
You learn your wisest lessons from your enemies. Assuming, of course, you survive the encounter.

Kendras is a casualty of war: injured, penniless, and quite possibly the last surviving member of the only family he's ever known—the elite fighting force known as the Scorpions. When a
steel-eyed stranger offers him medicine and shelter in exchange for submission and a secret task, Kendras has no choice but to accept. He is a Scorpion; he'll do whatever it takes to survive.

But his true goal is to rebuild the Scorpions. Neither Steel's possessive nature nor Kendras's shattered foot can keep him from finding the last of his brothers... or the mysterious leader of the Scorpions, a man who held Kendras's heart long before Steel tried to take it for himself. The goal is simple, the situation anything but. To rescue his leader and escape from Steel for good, Kendras must fight through a morass of politics and intrigue, where enemies are
allies and even allies have hidden agendas.
----------------------------------------------------


Cover, map and other stuff forthcoming once I have it.

In other news, I managed to get 800 words out yesterday. I have a plot for the boxer story and I have another idea for another historical, but I'll write that later - possibly next year.

I also have a bunch of stuff to edit for friends and some for money, and hope to make some serious progress on those, too. All that editing and rewriting has thrown my schedule out of whack a bit, but I'll catch up with the rest of my life, too.

And I bought presents for my partner (birthday on Friday). I hope he likes the Kinect. Me, I just love tech wizardry like that. And I noticed that Gears of War 3 is due 20 September. I can't WAIT.

For the first time in months, I'm caught up

Subjectively speaking, this is the first time since the beginning of the year that I have time on my hands. There's no urgent "needs doing yesterday" stuff on my desk. Nada. I don't have any of my own novels to edit for publication. (Doesn't mean I couldn't grab one from the drawer and rework it for submission - but no, I'm not going there.)

So, everything's off and gone. I finished the final line edits of "Scorpion" last week. After that, it was the "sanity check" for "Father of all Things", and I still found stuff. We also had to fill in cover spec sheets for both books (submitting artwork and ideas). And the last couple days, I've agonized over the blurb for "Scorpion". The final version of the line edits of "Father of all Things", went out this morning. The "Scorpion" blurb went out today, one day late.

I have loads of email I need to respond to. Royalty statements to organize (tax year ends in April). I have several ideas for new novels/stories. I bought a pile of books for research. I have three advanced works in progress, two of which need research.

I've fallen behind on blogging. Fallen off the face of the earth while wrestling with a pile of work. I have a contract to sign. A brain to recover. A desk to clean. More than six hundred THOUSAND words to edit for "Special Forces".

Part of me wants to go to bed.

On the way to London today (I managed to meet a friend in Foyles and not acquire a *single* book), I read what I have for the boxer story and "Scorpion 2". And there's some very good writing going on there. So, I'm hoping to do some work on either Scorpion part 2 or the boxer. Iron Cross still needs more research.

That's really the plan for the rest of the year - finish those three. It might even work out.

Three day weekend

I've taken today off to have enough time to tackle the edit of "Scorpion", which is due by Monday. I just sent off the cover specs for the book, which is always a bit of a struggle. All the images in my head don't translate well into actual visual images. Clashes are inevitable.

In this case, I had a very good visual model for Kendras, which I sent in. And the title, "Scorpion", really lends itself very well for at least one image. :) I don't know if my artist will roll with it, but a real life block or Emperor scorpion should play a prominent role.

In an y case, the next three days will mean a lot of knuckling down and working in the suggestions of my two betas to improve the book. I think I'll add a few thousands words in total so it's really smooth. I've also noticed some "pet words" and "pet expressions" that somehow sneaked into my style. These need to go.

The "danger" of this is that it'll give me a lot more impetus to write the sequel (and possibly a prequel, too - I don't feel like I'm done with that world, or the Scorpions). The "memory" they are using gives me a good excuse to keep writing about them, for one. (Like I need an excuse).

I'm in research mode for the boxer story. I finally wrote an outline two days ago (at work, a very quiet day). But I cant' read as much as I want to. Edits to do, books to finalize. Editing tends to get in the way of writing. I sometimes wish I could just write a book and hand it over for everything else - final edits, covers, blurbs, marketing. But of course that's an illusion. I already have so much help from my "test readers" and "feedbackers", I'd feel ungrateful if I was asking for anything more than that. (But maybe that would be the only incentive to really land a bestseller or five - the team of people that takes care of the nitty-gritty for me... hmmmmm, will have to consider that).

Other than that, nothing. I'm spending the free time at work editing and outlining creative work, which, as far as my boss is concerned, is editing and all editing is practice. So, yeah, I'm spending the time writing style sheets and learning more about copy-editing. There are some additional qualifications that I might go for, but that has another year or two. Right now, I'm in the perfect place, especially for the writing.

Right. Now off to edit/rewrite 70k words in three days. Should be fun.

The unfocused focus group

The focus group yesterday reminded me why I deplore meetings at work. Thankfully, we have a "team chat" at the bank and no real "meetings" - these are just about updating us on how the procedure has changed, since it's very much in flux. I consider meetings a cardinal waste of my time. And they were, in 95% of all the cases. I'm much better solving my own problems or finding a work-around that allows me to function.

Yesterday, I ended up in a group of self-professed "experts", all of which were tremendously self-important. So self-important, in fact, that they spent 95% of the time talking about how great they were and what museums they were trustees of - rather than tackle the exercises we were supposed to tackle as part of the focus group. My complains about the museum - namely that military history was slanted very much towards vaguely nationalist "rah-rah" patriotism (quote: "The British Expedition Force was the best military force in the world." - I DON'T THINK SO) and the way the - embarrassing and ludicrous - mistakes at Gallipoli were brushed over. Oh my, I assume the Turks were so hardcore and somehow, those 200,000 Anzacs just kinda died. Ooops. No idea why or how. Oh, look, SHINY DIORAMA.

So, while the National Army Museum has a very impressive collection, the way it's presented in the WWI and WWII galleries is incredibly weird (this time, I actually stopped and read all the descriptions - which have typos and a TON of passive tense and lots of jargon and cross-references that nobody gets or cares about). And to the fringe nationalist element in the focus group: "Fuck you." And to the guy who said "I bet in Germany, they're saying the German army was the best in the world, too." - Fuck you. We may not have much military history left, but at least we look at it from a critical POV. Asshole. The British Empire is over, ok? And talking about why so much space is devoted to "non-English" soldiers - hey, you were shipping in colonial soldiers from half the world to fight YOUR enemies, the very least you can do is RESPECT their contribution. Look around - contemporary London is a very white, English place, innit? Idjit.

To sum up, I got paid nicely to look at WWI and WWII stuff and to be a smartass about it. I think the Saturday couldn't have been more perfect. I was still too ill and croaky to tell the self-important idjits in my group where to stick their trusteeships and planting patterns, but otherwise, I had a good time. Authors always have a good time, even in the company of obnoxious people. That small smile we wear? Means "you just made my book, buddy".

Then I spent most of the money in the museum bookshop (two histories of WWII) and donated the rest. Six hours well spent, overall. But also another reinforcement why me and "the general public" don't mix well. Especially when I'm ill and barely able to speak.

On towards the weekend

I did show up for work on Thursday, which was also the busiest day of the week. Editing back-to-back for eight hours while kept upright (mostly) by Lemsip and a box of cough sweets is an interesting experience. Don't ask me what I edited - I'm sure I could find out, but I don't remember.

I was invited to attend a "focus group" of one of the military museums in London tomorrow. I *assume* they invite carefully-chosen "members of the public" to ask them questions about the collection and presentation. I'm selling myself as an "expert" on military stuff (which I guess is not overselling), and I fit into the categories they were looking for. I'll get paid for my time, too, but I'd feel weird accepting cash from a museum, so I'll likely invest that in a "friends of the National Army Museum" membership and donate the rest. I'd feel too weird having *them* pay *me*. Museums, libraries and all other noble causes can have my services for free.

The cough has broken, and after a pretty rotten day yesterday, I'm actually a lot more lively today and more together. I can also breathe deeply, which is nice. You take too many things for granted. My voice is husky, though, so my partner addressed me all day as "hey, Croaker", which is funny in a Black Company kinda way.

My team in the bank keeps digging about my writing. The geek factor in the team is much higher than I'd have expected. They know a fair amount, but I'm still keeping the pseudonym under wraps. However, it might be the first workplace I come out to while still working for the place. (I tend to tell my chosen few friends in any team after I've left.) It's not like they can fire me for it - it doesn't affect my work performance and I have three levels of superiors who are extremely reasonably, human and simply *nice*. I've rarely worked for a more grown-up, mature and pleasant place. No back-stabbing - if there are any politics, it's us against the research analysts - and only the assholes there (of which there are very few. But those that are unpleasant, all regard us like a utility... somewhere on the same level as the toilets. Mildly distasteful, a bit of a hassle and generally not something you'd respect.) However, 97% of all analysts are nice, and we have ways of dealing with those that aren't.

I shall meditate on the risks and boons associated with it. I'm not ashamed of what I'm doing, and they know about the genre and even that I'm a sex writer (when the situation calls for it, anyway). It might be interesting to see how they react. Maybe I'll come out with "Iron Cross", which may be the most respectable of all my books. I'll see. Or, as I keep telling people when they ask what the attraction of London is, "it's very hard to be a freak in London."

The boxer story is at 12k.

And Rachel is back from her crusade...errr, cruise. Welcome back!

I'm not ill, I just feel rotten

I'm in denial about my health at the moment, but when I got up and my vision greyed for a moment I thought, "okay, maybe I do work from home today". I don't want to go into graphic detail, but I seem to have the cold from hell. Blood is involved, too. Headaches. Woozyness. It's not the "clutch blanket, hide in bed" kinda cold, but it's bad enough that the last thing I want is to commute, cattle class, into London.

So I'm working from home, surrounded by Lemsip, dressed in several layers of clothes I can strip really fast when I get too hot, and also food so I remember to eat. (Last thing I want do to with a raw throat is eat - also, my body goes "Uh, no, don't give me food, can't you see I'm BUSY fighting those virii/bacteria, idjit.") At least I'm mostly coherent.

On the writing front, "Father of All Things" went back to Carina on Saturday (12. Feb). It got a completely new ending, and rewrites of about 6-7k of text. Which sounds easy, but trust me, it isn't. That book will be out on 15 August.

Then Dreamspinner has just emailed me to tell me that "Scorpion" in now in the editing stage. I expect the whole manuscript to come back to me in the next 4-6 weeks. Working on that will kick-start "Lying with Scorpions", the sequel.

My boxer story (the fist fighter, not the garment or the dog) hit 10k yesterday. It might grow to anything between 30-60k, but I expect it to be in the mid-range of that, so around 40-45k. I'd love for it to turn into a novel, of course, because I love the main character, as random and bipolar as he is. Working title of that is "Untouchable", but I may yet change that.

Then I got a very insightful, well-written review from Book Utopia for "Lion of Kent". While I respectfully disagree about the relative quality of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" and "Lion of Kent" (DADT is four years old and I'd be shocked if I hadn't developed as a writer in the meantime, plus, Kate Cotoner is hugely talented and really made the novella shine), there's a lot of food for thought in the review.

"This historical does what not very many in this genre really do for me – made me forget I was reading a historical. It's not because of the lack of detail to create the setting. It's the opposite. The story is just so well-realized that it never feels intrusive, never feels like I'm being reminded page after page that this happened a long time ago. It rings of authenticity, which is a credit both to the rather seamless prose and the meticulous structure of its presentation. There aren't awkward information dumps, or pages of facts that have nothing to do with moving the story forward. I sank into this story as if I was a squire within Sir Robert's household already, a natural extension of the world the authors created."

Read the rest here.

I'm apprehensive about writing the sequel to "Lion of Kent". It's not just the amount of research or the fact that, most likely, I'll be writing it alone, it's above all the extremely high expectations I have for that book. I'd hate for it to be any worse than "Lion of Kent".

Research for "Iron Cross" continues, but I'm slow on the word count. While I consider 1,000 words written on any story a good day's work, for "Iron Cross", 100 words is good work. I keep wondering if there's something wrong with my outline or plot that it moves so slowly, or if I'm lazy or procrastinating, but I don't think it's that. I may still hit my deadline with that - May.

Slow week

It's been a very slow week at work, which enabled me to get a lot of research done and a fair amount of reviewing. My bosses (at least the first two - no idea what the ueber-boss thinks) let me do whatever I want in the quiet times between editing assignments. I've been reading, editing, answering emails, surfing, and doing research. So, very productive time, really, in terms of writing and research. I'm catching up with my email and I'm getting better about my reviewing assignments.

Getting out of journalism was the best thing I've ever done. Apart from getting out of Germany, of course.

I just updated my website with some info on FOAT, which Rhianon and me are still pushing over the finishing line. The things gets a complete new ending, and that's been keeping my attention lately.

I've said before that this year is going to be slow. I'm already antsy about new releases. The last one was in November. That's four months! Feels like a lifetime now. But people have been wanting "more novels" - and novels simply take more time. I may throw in a few shorts just to keep my hand in, but largely, I'm concentrating on finishing my novels. Okay, there might be a novella in there, too.