Keris Stainton's Blog, page 23

New York always makes things better

I have that Tuesday feeling. Mainly because I couldn’t get to sleep for ages and then, when I finally did, Harry had a bad dream and got in bed with me. And then he couldn’t get to sleep (“I really can’t get to sleep!” “I think maybe the problem is I’m cold.” “I’m too hot and sweaty!” “I just can’t sleep!” “What are we going to do, Middy?!”) So I’m taking today very gently and trying to talk the boys into being gentle too (Me: “Can we watch The Muppets?” Harry: “No!” Me: “Despicable Me?” Harry & Joe: “NO!”)

But then I saw this New York video on Swissmiss and ohhhhh…

Amy Poehler + George Clooney = awesome

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Sexist bullshit? Buy the t-shirt!

Been meaning to post about these t-shirts for AGES. We saw them in the window of a shop in Whitby. Joe and I were waiting for David and Harry and ended up in front of the t-shirt shop. I’d said, “Oh look” before realising most of the t-shirts were tacky as hell. If Harry had been with me, I would have steered him swiftly away, but since it was Joe –  and he can’t read – we stayed.

Can you see Joe’s reflection? He was really interested in the t-shirts and asked me what they meant. Obviously, I didn’t tell him, although when he asked about the one on the right, “Why is that man sad but the lady is happy?” I said, “Because apparently someone forced him to get married” and then chuntered to myself for a while. (I honestly don’t understand all the so-called humour around men being miserable, losing their freedom, etc. Don’t want to get married? Don’t get married, jackass.)

There were a few other t-shirts in the same vein and what I found disturbing was how many people would stop, read them, and laugh. A family of four stopped and while the parents read the t-shirts and chortled over them, the daughter – who looked about 7 – read a few too. I could see her lips moving. She looked a bit confused. And I watched her, thinking about how right there she was learning how some men think about women. And, for that matter, how some women think about themselves. And it depressed the hell out of me.

I was cheered up a bit by Joe’s interpretation of this t-shirt – “You can’t poo here, cows!”, David and Harry returning with coffees, and the thought that the t-shirts at least work as a fool-proof dickhead indicator.

Homeschooling Harry: reading for pleasure

When Harry was at school, reading was a chore. It bothered me because I so wanted him to love books and reading because, you know, they’re such a big part of my life. To be fair, he has always been interested in books as objects – if we go into a bookshop, there are loads he wants to buy (don’t know who he gets it from) – but reading them? Himself? No.

School sent home the reading scheme books – The Magic Key. I hated them and so did Harry. They were just so dull with very little in the way of plot. I understand it must be difficult to make an entertaining story and stick to the rules of teaching phonics, but it does not make for a fun read. For a while, I tried to read them with him like the conscientious student I am (or was). I would cajole and bribe and threaten Harry. Sometimes he’d cry. Sometimes I’d cry. At one parents’ evening I told the teacher how much we hated them and she said she knew they weren’t great and they’d been trying to buy a new scheme, but didn’t have the funds.

When we read other books – when I read other books to him – we both enjoyed them, but then I always felt like I needed to get him to read too. So I’d suggest we read alternate pages or even alternate sentences and he would resist. Or refuse. At one point, I was getting him to read just the first word on each page. He’d read a few and then he’d get in a nark. And we’d end up shouting again.

Since I took him out of school, reading has become a joy again. I read to him and I don’t ask him to read to me. We’re discovering books together (Olga da Polga has been a big hit) and he is reading, but mostly not books. He reads on the computer and on the TV. He reads signs and information when we’re out and about. On the way to the cinema one day, he noticed a warning light on the car dashboard and asked me what it was. I told him to get the manual out of the glove compartment and look it up. He found it and read it out to me. (The car needs a service.)

The other night, as we were having dinner, Joe handed Harry this book and Harry read the questions out for the rest of the meal. We still have to be careful – if he gets the impression we want him to read – or even sometimes that we’re impressed that he’s reading something – he shuts right down. (One of the other home ed mums told me that’s probably a hangover from the school pressure and he’ll get over it eventually as part of the deschooling process.)

I love this Frank Cottrell Boyce article about reading for pleasure. The ‘wow words’ and ‘connectors’ (although when I asked Harry and his friend about it, they said it was ‘connectives’ not ‘connectors’) stuff drives me nuts. We went to have a look around a local secondary school during the summer – just out of nosiness – and went into the English class where there was a very enthusiastic and friendly teacher. He put something up on the whiteboard about writing a story… I can’t remember the details, partly because it was a while ago, partly because my brain just rejects this stuff. Anyway, he’d obviously tried to make it as entertaining as possible – it was a grid and you had to touch the word that should go in the sentence (I think). He asked Harry, who immediately went shy and I had a school flashback, thinking “Don’t ask me!” Because I wouldn’t have been able to answer with any confidence. And I’m a writer. With three published novels. My point being that the best way to learn to write is to read. And the best way to learn to read is to read for pleasure.

I’ve quoted this before, but it was such a A-ha moment for me that I’m quoting it again

As the founder and leader of The Manhattan Free School, Pat Werner recently explained to a group of educators, kids never stop learning. They are learning all along. They don’t “learn to read” the moment when they pick up a book and can sound out the words. They’ve been processing relevant information since they were born, and that moment is only the moment when the information begins to fit together in a way others can plainly observe and categorize.

It’s from this Kate Fridkis post Learning how to write.

(Perhaps unsurprisingly, I couldn’t find a photo of Harry reading – or at least not reading to Joe – so here’s one of him looking like he’s in a story instead.)

The wonder of three

He doesn’t want to take his pyjama top off…

No, I’m not pregnant.

Joe is 4 in a couple of weeks. I can’t believe it. I genuinely can’t. I have to keep checking that he’s not really going to be 3 (he was born the night after Obama’s inauguration though, so I should know it’s definitely 4).

He’s adorable – funny and clever and cute – and completely barmy. He does what we call an ‘insta-cry’ – like George in Peppa Pig – from absolutely fine to tears leaping right out of his face in 0.2 seconds. We’re having some success with “Why are you crying?” – he will actually stop and tell us and we’ll attempt to fix whatever it is – but other times “that’s really nothing to cry about” is the answer.

I thought of that when I read this very funny post 46 Reasons My Three Year Old Might Be Freaking Out (via BlueMilk). (Don’t read the comments. It really is not indicative of some sort of disorder; it’s the wonder of three.)

Pea’s Book of Big Dreams by Susie Day

The first book in this series – Pea’s Book of Best Friends – was one of my favourite books of last year and I couldn’t wait to read this one.

Eleven-year-old Pea and her wonderfully wacky family are back for their second adventure in this fabulously funny series.

After securing herself a best friend and settling into London life, Pea is now contemplating her future and what exactly she should be when she grows up. Should she be a writer (like Mum)? An artist (like their crazy new au pair Klaudia)? A footballer? A pet therapist? Join Pea as she attempts to find out the answers – with hilarious results!

I think it’s even more gorgeous than the first book – it made me laugh out loud and it made me well up, but mostly it just made me happy. I can’t wait to read it with Harry.

 

Yoga for writers

Not just for writers, but for anyone who spends a ridiculous amount of time sitting at a computer…

I’ve been having a few problems with my right arm since getting my new desk (it’s just that bit too high). I’ve been trying to switch my mouse to the left (so I can have problems with my left arm too!) (not really, it doesn’t seem to hurt that arm, for some reason), but I’ve also been trying to stretch more.

These stretches are so simple, but they really do seem to work – even stretching my arms out and turning them over makes a big difference. I just need to remember to do them every day, rather than when my shoulders are stuck up round my ears:

This one is brilliant both for sore computer arms and also what I call “iPad wrist” (just me?):

Now this one isn’t strictly related to being a writer (ahem), but I’ve done this Yoga for Hangovers video a few times and it always makes me feel better.

Image courtesy of Craftyjoe / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

How to make New Year’s Resolutions fun. No, really.

I’m rubbish at resolutions. I’m rubbish at sticking to things, even things I know are good for me and will make me happy. But I do like games and challenges and collecting points/being virtually patted on the head* and so I managed to find a few ways to make resolutions fun. If you’re a dork like me.

I read about 750 Words online somewhere (sorry, can’t remember where) and signed up straight away. If I did do resolutions, one would be to write more and faff less, so 750 Words is perfect. Plus you collect points and get badges (for, for example, writing for 3 days in a row, writing a certain number of words, etc.). I plan to reward myself for each badge. (I got the 3 day badge yesterday and bought a Sadler’s Wells book for an upcoming Twitter book club.) And, being a dork, I really love the stats:

Following some links on 750 Words took me to Health Month, which I find slightly confusing (I’m not at all sure I’m doing it right), but basically you commit to a few health improvements for a month – they can be as big or as small as you like – and, again, you collect points. Mine are to drink three glasses of water, eat one piece of fruit, exercise for minimum 10 minutes each day, and limit myself to one alcoholic drink per week (I was thinking of going ‘dry’ for January, but there’s Bailey’s left in the bottle). So far, so have-made-the-same-”resolutions”-every-year-for-as-long-as-I-can-remember. But the best part of Health Month for me is that you can sign up to a reminder email for each of the improvements you choose (you do have to pay for this, but it was something like £3). So this morning when I got my ‘eat fruit’ email, I immediately went and, you know, ate a piece of fruit. No, not that big a deal for most people, but I can honestly go weeks without eating fruit usually. I leave the emails unread in my inbox until I’ve done them and since I check my inbox about a kajillion times a day, I’m reminded over and over. (A few months down the line I may well become jaded and just delete them without doing, but for now they are actually inspiring me.)

As mentioned in my Books of the Year post, I struggle to tear myself away from the iPad and read and I want to stop doing that, not so much because I want to read more – although I do always want to read more – but because I want to waste less time faffing about on social media. So I challenged myself to read 100 books in the Goodreads 2013 Reading Challenge.

Eek. Better get back to my book.

*Please note: I do not like being patted on the head IRL.

Would you sky surf?

Watching Adventures in Wild California, a documentary I saw years ago at the Imax, was on our Summer To Do list, but the boys refused to watch it – probably because they knew I really wanted them to.

A few nights ago, Harry and I watched a bunch of loosely related videos – a shuttle launch, Felix Baumgartner’s jump, some parachute jumps (morbid Harry wants to see one where the parachute doesn’t open!) and then I showed him this clip from Adventures in Wild California:

I’ve seen it lots of times now and I still can’t believe it can be done. Just one of the most breathtaking things I’ve ever seen. Harry immediately said he wanted to do it one day and I refrained from saying “Over my dead body.”

(Back in 2001, David and I had a picnic and a bottle of wine in that little park where he lands.)

My year in books

This year has been an excellent one for books, but not so much for me and reading. Mainly because of the iPad. When my Kindle packed up, I decided rather than replacing the Kindle, I’d spend the refund money on books. Because we have a Kindle app on the iPad, so I figured I didn’t really need a Kindle (but of course I always need more books).

But whenever I pick up the iPad to read a book, this happens: Check email. Check Twitter. Check Facebook. Check Google Reader. Check Instapaper. Kindle app is next, but it’s been at least 30 seconds since I last checked email and Twitter, so I check them again. And again. And again. Depending on how much I’m enjoying the book I’m reading, this stage can last from between 10 minutes to ALL FRIGGING DAY. (Actually, sometimes even if I’m really enjoying the book I’m reading and am gagging to get back to it, I can still spend a ridiculously long time in social media limbo, cursing myself all the time. What is wrong with me?!) Sometimes, even when I finally click on the Kindle app, I tell myself I need to read some of the samples (to get them out of the way) before getting back to my book and then, of course, once I’ve read a sample, I have to go and check email, and Twitter, and… *smacks self hard in face with iPad*

(At least I’m not alone – this piece by Kevin Barry, found via Ben Johncock, was very familiar. Although I only self-Google once a month, honest.)

Anyway. Despite the above madness, I managed to read the 52 Books I “reviewed” on here and a bunch of others I haven’t mentioned (cos I forgot… or couldn’t be arsed). So in no particular order…

My favourite adult books (no, not 50 Shades of Grey…):

My favourite young adult (and slightly younger) books:

My favourite non-fiction books:

Some authors have two books on my faves list, so I’ve bundled them together:

 

 

If I had to pick one absolute favourite book of the year, I think it would be Attachments – I didn’t want it to end and I’m still actually a bit annoyed that it did – but it’s so hard to choose!

Finally, one of the best things I read all year was a WIP by Louise Jones. I think it was only 10,000 words or so, but I absolutely loved it and have been nagging Louise for more ever since. Sadly, she’s been too busy carrying the Olympic torch, heading off to university, appearing in documentaries, and having talks with agents. She’s going to take the world by storm (actually, she already is) and I can’t wait to go into a book shop and buy her book.