Debra Shigley's Blog, page 3

Upgrade Your New Year’s Resolution

I’m not such a huge fan of New Year’s Resolutions. I tend to believe that there’s never a perfect time to get going on a new goal or project– so it’s better to just start now, where you are, rather than wait for the so-called perfect day to begin.  Case in point, I’ve been lax on my blogging (!) and trust me, even though I was tempted, rather than put it off even more and tell myself “okay, when the New Year starts, I resolve to blog 3 times a week,” I’m just going to post a little something RIGHT NOW. You can only start right where you are.

That said, the New Year is a great time to review your accomplishments of the past year, regroup from disappointments, and brainstorm bigger and better dreams for the coming year. If you want to find a creative way to renew this year and ditch the typical resolution fare (in case you haven’t heard, about 97% of New Year’s resolutions fail!), here are a few ideas:

Have a family summit. This is more of a goal setting exercise, rather than resolutions (apparently, even the Kardashians do this each year!). My husband and I started doing this several years ago. Set aside a special time to review the family accomplishments of the past year, and think positively about the new one. Pick 3-4 big categories in your lives– career, family, health, money, etc.– and come up with a handful of yearly goals in each department. Choose attainable goals/projects (paint the house, ask for a promotion)– along with a few reach goals. The idea is that you’ll check in with your goals a couple times during the next year.
Pick a theme. Another new year’s trend is to skip the traditional restrictive resolutions (i.e., quit smoking, lose weight) and instead pick a broad theme to inspire your actions during the upcoming year. This can literally be one word–  perhaps it’s “family” or “gratitude” or “relaxation”. This is a lower-stress way to encourage broader changes in your thinking and priorities throughout the year.
Do a massive “edit”– from closets to Facebook. We hear so much about spring cleaning, but the new year is a great time to “prune” what’s weighing you down from the previous year. Go through, say, your bathroom cabinets, make up bag or closet and ruthlessly toss the items you haven’t used in months. I plan to finally purge the boxes and bags of makeup samples I’ve had for years (in fact, maybe I’ll do this today!). Also, consider pruning your Facebook friends and even your contacts in your phone. If you haven’t spoken or interacted with contacts (or, you just have people hanging in there that consistently annoy you), just press delete. You’ll instantly feel lighter.
Think “wants” rather than “shoulds”. The top resolutions are consistently to stop smoking and lose weight–things we all should do to be healthy. Yet the #1 reason for failing to keep up the resolution is lack of motivation. Instead of saying what “should” I do or what do I need to do, ask yourself what do I really WANT to change about my life? To keep up that motivation, you really have to want to make a certain life change. This year, pick a small new year’s goal that sparks passion and fun in your life– maybe you always wanted to take a painting or photography class. Do it!

Upgrade Your New Year's Resolution

I'm not such a huge fan of New Year's Resolutions. I tend to believe that there's never a perfect time to get going on a new goal or project– so it's better to just start now, where you are, rather than wait for the so-called perfect day to begin.  Case in point, I've been lax on my blogging (!) and trust me, even though I was tempted, rather than put it off even more and tell myself "okay, when the New Year starts, I resolve to blog 3 times a week," I'm just going to post a little something RIGHT NOW. You can only start right where you are.

That said, the New Year is a great time to review your accomplishments of the past year, regroup from disappointments, and brainstorm bigger and better dreams for the coming year. If you want to find a creative way to renew this year and ditch the typical resolution fare (in case you haven't heard, about 97% of New Year's resolutions fail!), here are a few ideas:

Have a family summit. This is more of a goal setting exercise, rather than resolutions (apparently, even the Kardashians do this each year!). My husband and I started doing this several years ago. Set aside a special time to review the family accomplishments of the past year, and think positively about the new one. Pick 3-4 big categories in your lives– career, family, health, money, etc.– and come up with a handful of yearly goals in each department. Choose attainable goals/projects (paint the house, ask for a promotion)– along with a few reach goals. The idea is that you'll check in with your goals a couple times during the next year.
Pick a theme. Another new year's trend is to skip the traditional restrictive resolutions (i.e., quit smoking, lose weight) and instead pick a broad theme to inspire your actions during the upcoming year. This can literally be one word–  perhaps it's "family" or "gratitude" or "relaxation". This is a lower-stress way to encourage broader changes in your thinking and priorities throughout the year.
Do a massive "edit"– from closets to Facebook. We hear so much about spring cleaning, but the new year is a great time to "prune" what's weighing you down from the previous year. Go through, say, your bathroom cabinets, make up bag or closet and ruthlessly toss the items you haven't used in months. I plan to finally purge the boxes and bags of makeup samples I've had for years (in fact, maybe I'll do this today!). Also, consider pruning your Facebook friends and even your contacts in your phone. If you haven't spoken or interacted with contacts (or, you just have people hanging in there that consistently annoy you), just press delete. You'll instantly feel lighter.
Think "wants" rather than "shoulds". The top resolutions are consistently to stop smoking and lose weight–things we all should do to be healthy. Yet the #1 reason for failing to keep up the resolution is lack of motivation. Instead of saying what "should" I do or what do I need to do, ask yourself what do I really WANT to change about my life? To keep up that motivation, you really have to want to make a certain life change. This year, pick a small new year's goal that sparks passion and fun in your life– maybe you always wanted to take a painting or photography class. Do it!

I won an award today! (and met Donna Brazile!)

I was so honored and humbled to be named one of the fifteen Most Powerful and Influential Women in Georgia by the National Diversity Council this morning. The awards were part of the Georgia Leadership Conference, and it was incredible day of panel discussions and speeches by go-getters of all ages, races– men and women alike.

The highlight for me was keynote speaker Donna Brazile, who is not only beyond inspiring, but also hilariously funny off-the-cuff (who knew?!). During her address, she spoke about her experiences in politics and media; what it takes to be a leader; and how to nurture your ambition. "Everything you need to succeed is already packaged within you," Donna said. She shared that what has sustained her through the ups and downs of her career is her core belief that she is doing good, meaningful work. "It's always been my dream to make a difference– to make the world a better place," she said. Donna, who hails from New Orleans, also spoke about her passion for cooking. She advised that at all times, all women need these three ingredients in their freezer: onions, garlic, and peppers. She called this the "holy trinity" that will enable you to cook anything. Well, looking at my freezer now, I of course have none of these ingredients

Blow Out Bars Take Off (But You Already Knew That)

Today the WSJ picks up on a trend that most Go-Getter Girls already knew all about: the blowout. Or as some like to call it, getting your "hair did." This is one of the easiest, most effective ways to take your glam factor from zero to wow– and to avoid the stress of bad hair days. We saw GGGs designer Liz Lange and beauty entrepreneur Polly Blitzer "can't live without" their blowouts. And you know that I've gotten my hair blown out in salons all over the world, enduring awkwardness and language barriers if need be, to avoid doing my hair myself.

Spending an hour in the salon a few times a week is actually both time and opportunity cost efficient: Unless you've got major skills, all the right products and tools (and a healthy dose of patience), chances are a professional blow dry will look way better than you can do yourself. Plus, you'll have more time to focus on more important things, like what outfit you're going to wear, what you're actually going to say during that big presentation.

Top Office Pet Peeves via LinkedIn

Are you annoyed by the messy microwave or noisy co-workers chatting on their cells? You're not alone. LinkedIn released a global survey of 17,000 workers today on the top office pet peeves. Here are the top five:

People not taking ownership of their actions
Constant complainers
Dirty common areas
Starting meetings late or going long
People who don't respond to emails

LinkedIn's survey also found interesting correlations related to gender. For example, 62 percent of U.S. women were bothered by "clothing that's too revealing for the workplace," while only 29 percent of U.S. men surveyed said that was a problem (Is this really surprising?!).

There are also many cross-cultural differences. Americans are particularly bothered by people stealing food from the communal fridge. Swedes are less bothered by revealing clothing in the workplace. Germans are most annoyed by dirty common areas.

Job seekers should also take note: hiring managers were more peeved than others by people who were late.

To see the full press release, visit LinkedIn's site.

So, what are your top office pet peeves?

GGG Mindy Kaling Works A Lot

Loved this New York Times magazine article about writer and actress Mindy Kaling, who stars as Kelly Kapoor on The Office. A GGG through and through, she's a Dartmouth grad who clearly loves what she does. A few very interesting nuggets from the piece:

She routinely works 18-hour days writing for the show, starting at 10 a.m. and leaving after 7 p.m. On days when she acts in the show, too, she starts at 6 a.m. for hair & makeup, then jets back and forth all day between the writer's room and set. She never volunteers to leave early.
Her big break came just one year after college, when a goofy short play she wrote about Ben Affleck and Matt Damon became a surprise hit at a New York festival. The producer of The Office hired her as a writer two months later.

I think there's a great lesson in this latter story: start doing your own thing (just do it!), and it could be the unexpected audition for your dream job.

Mindy has a memoir coming out in November called Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me (and Other Concerns). It will definitely be on my reading list!

Photo: Justin Stephens for The New York Times

Ask Go-Getter Girl: How to follow up on new contacts

Last week I attended an amazing conference, the Atlanta Urban Entrepreneurship Forum, featuring keynote speakers Tyler Perry and one of our own featured GGGs, dancer Ofelia de la Valette. As I was sitting here going through a zillion business cards gathered throughout the day, I thought of how often people ask me, "how do I follow-up when I meet someone new at an event?" For my debut video tip, here's my answer.

Warning: the production values ain't no Today Show!

From Martin Lawrence to the Mayor's Office

Stacii Jae Johnson believes careers always come full circle—and mentally, you should start at the end point and work backwards. Few understood why after acting in shows including Martin and ER, and a number of films, Stacii took her current role as Director of Special Events for Atlanta Mayor Kasim Reed. But Stacii knew better. "My life is always intentional, though I follow the natural direction and patterns that emerge," she says. "If you allow yourself to flow into different things, it still gets you to the same place but you have a more interesting path and stories to share." Case in point, she's about to become the commissioner of Atlanta's new Office of Film, Television, Music and Digital Media Development where surprise, surprise, all those Hollywood connections she forged 15 years ago will come in pretty handy. Here, Stacii shares three great lessons she's learned along the way.

Act Like You Own the Room

To this day, I still use an acting tip I learned from Suzanne Batson [acting coach to the likes of Nicole Kidman]. You know how a room has four corners? When you walk into the room, visualize that you are stretching and shooting your energy out to each one of those four corners. I literally look in each direction—as if I'm shooting a web of energy like Spiderman. Then, I'm bigger than the room. If you walk in feeling you're bigger than the room, you have more confidence and command your audience.

Follow through—and check your pride at the door.

Here's how I got my first job as a production assistant on Martin: I'd call up the production coordinator to beg for a meeting, and she'd shoo me away and say call her back. So, I'd set my alarm to call her back when she told me to. 15 minutes, 30 minutes, 40 minutes later, the next month. I always called her back. I never thought "Who does she think she is?" or that she was blowing me off. Eventually she invited me in for a meeting, where I talked non-stop about how much I wanted to work on the show. I got the job, and they later told me it was because they were amazed by my energy and just wanted to be around me!

Make Friends on the Way Up

When I started doing fundraisers for politicians like Hilary Clinton, people were shocked by how many celebrities I could draw to events. But these were people I knew from my days coming up. I can call actors like Taraji P. Henson and Martin Lawrence and say, "Hey, do you want to do this for me, please?" and they say yes because we're friends, and they remember how we all were broke together. They remember when we went to Boston market and had to split a chicken dinner! It's the truth. You might not know right now why you need a certain relationship. But know that as you get older, as long as don't burn those bridges, those relationships will be the key to your career.

Nude Stockings are Back! Thanks to Kate Middleton

In one shimmery stride, Duchess of Cambridge Kate Middleton has brought back sheer pantyhose. Well, I couldn't feel more vindicated! Readers will know that I've stood by the nude stocking as a necessary wardrobe element in certain professional situations, like job interviews. Apparently, they're royal protocol as well, which is why Kate donned them during her recent trip to Americas. You can't deny Kate looked great in each and every one of her designer ensembles– and fashion insiders agree her nude stockings looked "elegant" not dowdy. Love it! Nude hose are now flying off the shelves in Britain. Will America be next? Just be sure to get a high-quality, lightweight sheer version, like Spanx All the Way.

Photo: Lionel Hahn – WPA Pool/Getty Images

GGGG in Budapest!

I recently was in Budapest, Hungary and was beyond thrilled to find the Hungarian translation of The Go-Getter Girl's Guide in the gorgeous Alexandra Bookshop. I had my own little Carrie Bradshaw moment (remember when she finds her book in a Paris bookstore?!).

Here's to all the Hungarian Go-Getter Girls!