Jennifer Slattery's Blog

Finding Safe People With whom to share your pain

When we’re hurting, we don’t want people to bombard us with advice, try to top our struggle with stories of their own, or respond with dismissive platitudes. Sadly, those types of reactions tend to make us feel even more isolated.

If you’ve experienced something similar, you can understand how defeated and alone Rhonda felt when she returned home with her newborn while her newly transferred husband was setting things up for the family in a new city. Sleep-deprived and emotionally overwhelmed as a new mom in the middle of transition, she arrived at her parents’ house aching for encouragement and support. Instead, her mother met her pain with criticism that left Rhonda feeling ashamed and alone in her struggle.

But while she left that visit feeling more inadequate than ever, the Lord comforted her bruised soul through the loving, wise words of someone who truly saw her heart, understood her difficulty, and validated her emotions. That conversation helped her see her mom’s lack of empathy for what it was—and showed her how to recognize whether someone is, or isn’t, a safe person with whom to share her deepest hurts.

I thought of Rhonda’s story this week while listening to my cohost’s conversation with Chris Morris on the Faith Over Fear podcast. Chris shared about a time he felt so hopeless he tried to end his life and awoke in a mental hospital, initially angry that his attempt had failed. Back then, he felt no one understood his pain. Now, he has seven people he can call anytime he’s struggling—friends who listen before advising and love instead of criticizing.

In a recent Instagram post, he shared tips on how to find your safe people—those spiritual brothers and sisters who reflect the love and grace of Christ when we need it most:

Be authentic but brief when someone asks how you’re doing. Say something like, “It’s been a challenging season,” instead of the default “I’m fine.” This invites connection without overexposing your heart.Notice their reaction. If they ask more, share for a minute or two. Their response will show whether they’re open to deeper friendship or uncomfortable with your honesty.Look for curiosity, not judgment. Safe people don’t rush to fix, preach, or one-up your pain. They listen, care, and say, “That sounds hard. Tell me more.”

I’d love to hear from you—how do you recognize safe people in your life? Share your thoughts below so we can encourage one another. I also encourage you to listen to Chris’s story in this week’s Faith Over Fear podcast episode. And make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss a single episode!

https://www.lifeaudio.com/faith-over-fear/

Cultivating Wonder – Guest Post by Becky Harling

This past week, I have to admit, I felt a bit overwhelmed. Delayed flights, lost suitcases, books that had to be mailed out, and deadlines that had to be met all left me feeling a bit spazy. I was fearful I would forget some detail and drop the ball on some deadline. Ever felt that way?

Early this morning, after worshiping and surrendering my day to the Lord, I opened my Bible to Mark chapter 9. After I read about the glory of the transfiguration, I read about Jesus coming to a large crowd. The following words struck me: “As soon as all the people saw Jesus, they were overwhelmed with wonder and ran to greet Him” (Mark 9:15). It was one of those divine moments when I felt the Holy Spirit speaking right to my heart!

The crowd was overwhelmed with wonder. They weren’t overwhelmed by all they had to accomplish. They were overwhelmed because they came face-to-face with the majesty of Jesus Christ.

What does it mean for you and me to be overwhelmed with wonder?

It means we are awestruck by His love. When we really understand how much God loves us, the depth of His love takes our breath away. We realize we never have to feel worried again because God Almighty loves us so much that He holds every detail of our lives lovingly in His hands. We realize His love is so great that nothing can separate us from His love. As a result, we are never alone.

It means we are stunned by His grace and mercy. I never want to take His grace for granted. When I get frazzled or frantic, His grace is extended. When I worry, foolishly obsessing over “what ifs” or “what thens,” His grace pours out on me and reminds me that He is the blessed controller of all things. I can let go of my worries. I can simply rest in His peace and once again experience the joy of His grace and mercy.

It means we are amazed at His righteousness and faithfulness. I can’t even wrap my human mind around God’s goodness. He is so righteous my imagination can’t comprehend it, and He is so faithful that I am simply flabbergasted! His perfect nature compels me to fall on my knees and worship. He is the glorious One in whom there is no shadow of sin or shame. As I worship Him in His glorious nature, my mind is calmed, and once again I experience the peace of His presence.

Friend, I want to invite you to pray with me that we will be more overwhelmed with wonder as we fix our gaze on Jesus Christ. A song that has helped me rekindle wonder has been “Holy Hands” by Hannah and Paul McClure. Don’t just listen—allow the words to lead you to deeper worship and wonder!

This week on The Connected Mom Podcast, we are introducing a new series on how to cultivate a love of reading in your child. Be sure to tune in! 

Friend-Wise releases in February. I am looking for women who are willing to pre-read the book, order the book, and then help me get the word out. If you’re interested in being part of my Friend-Wise launch team, would you contact me? 

Get to Know Becky Harling

A best-selling author, Becky Harling has written 16 books. She is a popular speaker at conferences, retreats and other events. Becky is a John Maxwell leadership and communications coach. She has been a guest on many media outlets including Focus on the Family, Family Life Today, 100 Huntley Street, Moody Radio and the Total Christ Television Today Show.  Becky is the host of, The Connected Mom Podcast and loves encouraging other moms to connect more intentionally.  She loves hiking with her husband, playing with her 14 grandkids, shopping with her daughters, hanging out with her son and having coffee with friends!

Visit her on her website and follow her on Instagram, Facebook, and her Amazon author page.

Check Out Her Book, Cultivating Deeper Connections in a Lonely World:

Loneliness is an epidemic, but you can live life with a deep sense of belonging.

If you’ve ever felt that ache to connect and belong, you’re not alone: three out of every five people are suffering from loneliness. No group is excluded—married, unmarried, parents, pastors, leaders, elderly, and teenagers. We all experience moments . . . or long seasons of heart-aching loneliness. And it hurts. It can hurt right to the core.

In Cultivating Deeper Connections in a Lonely World, relationship expert, mother, grandmother, and John Maxwell Certified Coach Becky Harling taps into the deep ache of loneliness and shares with readers a rich theology of belonging. Does God ache for us? What does it mean that we belong to Him? How do we establish a deeply bonded relationship with others? What steps can we take to improve our relationships?

Because we were made for God and for community, relational isolation or brokenness is incredibly painful. But we don’t have to live isolated and unconnected. In fact, we must not. Our souls were designed for more. Deeply rooted in Scripture and joined with reflection questions, this book shows us how we can strengthen our relationships and experience deep connection.

Grab your copy HERE.

Jennifer here. Here’s a song that has helped me to cultivate holy wonder of my God–and that I’ve currently been listening on constant replay. Enjoy!

https://www.lifeaudio.com/faith-over-fear/

Living Split: The Cost of Hiding Our Wounded Half – Guest post by Jessica Brodie

Have you ever seen a tree split in two, yet still standing tall? It’s a beautiful and amazing thing to behold.

Recently my husband and I went camping in the Monongahela National Forest in West Virginia. I didn’t notice the tree the evening before, when we set up camp. But at dawn, I wandered a bit and discovered the tall beauty. Slender but sturdy, she rose high above our campsite. Right down the center, it looked like a perfect slice had been made from top to bottom. Yet still she stood, growing and thriving, providing shelter for countless forest creatures.

Gazing at the two halves, I began to think about how that’s sometimes the way it is with people. Many of us seem to have two halves—one that’s our private self and one that’s the version we show the world. Both halves are there, making up one whole and functioning as one for all the world to see.

Yet when you pause to look closely, you notice there’s a split. Maybe one half isn’t identical to the other. Perhaps it has scars, defects, and wounds, things that weaken its structure or weigh it down. The other side might look healthier, as if thriving. Regardless, it’s connected to that other half. Both are part of the same unit. They are one, tied together in life.

For many years I was like that—I had what felt like two widely separate “halves.” I had my public self, which pretended everything was just perfect, as if I had no problems at all. Perhaps I looked confident, invincible, like I had it all together. Yet walking alongside me in every moment was that other half—vulnerable, wounded, hurting, and overly sensitive.

That other half had a harder time trusting, a harder time confiding. It built up an armor of protection from what it assumed was a big, bad world—so much armor, in fact, that few could penetrate it. So much armor that I spent far too much energy on protecting myself from harm instead of what God really wanted me to focus on.

It was a lonely place, and I’m grateful those years are over.

That notion of a hidden self—a hidden “half”—is something I address in my latest Christian contemporary novel, Tangled Roots. In the book, Tiff has carefully constructed a façade so ironclad that no one knows she was once raised in an abusive, dysfunctional family, one of those “no good Steadmans.” She ran so far from her past both physically and emotionally that it doesn’t even cross her mind anymore, except in the occasional nightmare.

Yet when her brother is released from prison and his parole officer wants him to join Tiff in her new, wholesome hometown of Dahlia, South Carolina, her carefully concealed past now comes back to haunt her. She has to confront her past—her hidden wounds, her hidden self, not to mention her anger toward her brother and her family—in order to move into a healthy, godly future.

Do you know someone who goes through this in real life, or is that something you have been struggling with? It takes a lot of emotional and spiritual effort to maintain those two halves—so much so that the work sometimes interferes with God’s purpose for our lives. Sometimes it prevents us from forgiving those who once hurt us, or even forgiving ourselves for past sins. Sometimes it prevents us from becoming the best, healthiest version of ourselves—the person God truly wants us to be, brimming with the fruit of the Spirit.

There are times when it’s best to leave the past in the past. But sometimes, we need to deal with the pain of the past in order to let it go.

God can help with this. Church can help with this.

But once we’re free of the shackles of the past, the liberation is truly, abundantly awesome.

“So you also are complete through your union with Christ, who is the head over every ruler and authority.”—Colossians 2:10 (NLT)

Let’s talk about this! How easy or challenging do you find it to share your pain and difficulties with others? Why do you think this is? Share your thoughts in the comments below, because we can all learn from and encourage each other!

Get to Know Jessica Brodie

Jessica Brodie is an award-winning Christian novelist, journalist, editor, blogger, and writing coach. She is also the editor of the South Carolina United Methodist Advocate, the oldest newspaper in Methodism. Her two Christian contemporary novels, The Memory Garden and Tangled Roots, are Amazon bestsellers. Learn more about Jessica’s writing ministry and read her faith blog at http://jessicabrodie.com. She has a YouTube devotional, and you can also connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, and more. She’s also produced a free eBook, A God-Centered Life: 10 Faith-Based Practices When You’re Feeling Anxious, Grumpy, or Stressed.

Check Out Her Latest Release, Tangled Roots:

Some secrets can’t stay buried forever.
Tiff Steadman has spent seven years running from the broken pieces of her past—the alcoholic parents, the convicted-felon brother, the shame of being “one of those no-good Steadmans.” Now, as editor of the Dahlia Weekly, she’s finally built the respectable life she’s always craved. With a proposal from her upstanding boyfriend Bobby, everything seems perfect.

Until her past comes knocking.

James Steadman has found God behind prison bars, but freedom feels more terrifying than his cell ever did. All he wants is a chance to reconnect with the little sister he once protected—the sister who now refuses to even acknowledge his existence. When his parole officer sends him to Dahlia, James discovers Tiff’s walls run deeper than he imagined, and starting over means confronting the wreckage they both left behind.

Two siblings. One devastating secret. And a love that refuses to let go.

As wedding plans collide with family secrets, Tiff must choose between the safe life she’s built and the messy grace that might heal them both. Can she find the courage to let her brother back into her heart? And can James prove that redemption is real—even for people like them?

In a small Southern town where everyone knows everyone’s business, some stories are too painful to tell—and too powerful to stay buried. Grab your copy HERE!

Buy Book Two in the Dahlia Series, where grace meets grit, hearts are mended, and hope finds a way to flourish.

https://www.lifeaudio.com/faith-over-fear/

Held Secure in Christ

(This first published on May 19, 2022.)

Jesus should’ve given up on me long ago. But each day, despite my sins and failures, God draws and holds me close.

In Christ, I am held secure.

I never fully understood God’s heart for me until I became a parent. But having walked beside my daughter through her obedient and rebellious times, I’ve come to understand the love that never lets go and never gives up.

When our daughter was young, we moved across the country, a transition she struggled with. Though initially we were oblivious to her pain—seven-year-olds aren’t often able to express their emotions—we soon became alert to a drastic change of behavior. Our normally cheerful, affectionate little girl had become sullen and angry.

I was confused and concerned.

One afternoon, she grew quite upset with me (for reasons I can’t remember), and shouted, “I hate you!” then slammed her bedroom door.

That was the first, and perhaps last time she’d ever said something like that to me, and it broke my heart, but not for the reasons you may assume.

My heart broke because I knew hers was breaking. Beneath her anger and harsh words, I saw her pain, and in that moment, what I longed for most was to draw her near and hold her close.

I’ve displayed a similar response toward God as she had to me, numerous times, throughout my faith journey. Like when my friend was dying, and I struggled to reconcile my circumstances with what I knew regarding God’s love, power, and sovereignty. Once my emotions settled down, guilt and fear followed. Had my anger angered God?

Had I—or would I—do something that would drive Him away for good?

But each time, I discovered not only had He remained, but He was actually taking giant, loving steps toward me.

In John 10:29, our Savior said, “My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand” (NIV).

That’s a promise we can hold tight to. Christ holds me, and you, secure and His love will always, always remain.

Unshakable. Immovable. Solid and Sure.

Let’s talk about this! How can you rest in the security of Christ today? Sometimes this starts with a reminder. The reminder that we don’t have to have it all together or know all the answers. We simply need to turn and surrender to and rely upon the One who does.

Speaking of reliance on Christ, make sure to check out the latest Your Daily Bible Verse podcast episode on living in Christ’s perfect guidance.

Before you go, make sure to check out my latest Bible reading plan on the YouVersion Bible app!

Plan description: You’re not insufficient, overlooked, unimportant or unseen. In Christ, you are loved, chosen, called, redeemed, empowered and held close by the One who crafted your every cell, knows your every flaw, sees your potential. Unfortunately, wounds from our past can challenge our ability to view ourselves as the Lord’s beloved. May this 30-day plan remind you of who you are to Christ and in Christ, helping you live with increased confidence and joy.

https://www.lifeaudio.com/faith-over-fear/

Trusting in the Power of Christ

(Note: This first posted on August 12, 2021).

In my early years in ministry, I often exhausted myself trying to manage everything. Though I knew with certainty my assignment came directly from God, I routinely behaved as if He expected me to carry the load alone. As if results came through sheer grit rather than the works of His hands.

When one of my team members forgot or failed to complete a task, I felt responsible to step in and catch every ball that happened to get dropped. Though I talked a great deal about faith-filled, surrendered living, I routinely behaved as if our results depended on me. Unfortunately, my attitude trickled down to everyone else, turning roles that should’ve brought us great joy, fulfillment, and ever-deepening connections with our Savior into tiresome, anxiety-producing chores.

I knew, intellectually, I wasn’t living or leading as God desired but lacked the courage to slow my hustle. I felt like if I did, we’d fail. When it was my very fear of failure that steadily and rapidly led me in that direction by decreasing my reliance on Christ, my source of wisdom and strength. While, sadly, proclaiming the power of surrender, demonstrating perhaps my heart didn’t believe what my mouth proclaimed.

Then, one spring, life hit many of my team members hard. Hurricanes threw some off balance. Family illnesses left others struggling to think straight let alone write or create. At first, I tried to work harder and faster but this only led to burnout with little visible growth.

My inspiration and vision squashed, I wanted to quit. And so, for a time, I basically did. We all did, in fact, for nearly six months. I expected to see all that we’d worked for begin to fade until our organization died completely, like so many others I’d seen pop up then disappear over the years.

Instead, we grew. And when the Coronavirus forced us to cancel a year’s worth of events, and therefore a year’s worth of funding, we grew again in terms of readership, impact, and volunteers. Through this, God reminded me of something, in all my running, I’d seemed to have forgotten. The God who formed, redeemed, molded, and empowers me doesn’t need me to perform or to strive. Instead, He invites me to yield and to trust. Or rather, to shift my trust—off of myself and place it where it belongs, on Him.

Isaiah 30:15a says, “In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength” (NIV).  God spoke these words to ancient Israel when the Assyrian army was coming against them. Grossly overpowered from a human perspective, they were terrified. In their desperation, they turned to Egypt, with its iron chariots and well-trained army, placing more faith in the might of man than God Almighty. They thought they were aligning themselves with strength. But by distancing themselves from the God who loved them, they were actually increasing their weakness.

God beckoned them to return to Him, the One who had proven His faithfulness again and again, but they refused to listen. And while I can recognize the foolishness of their actions when reading the historical account from the comfort of my bedroom, I much too frequently behave like them when I feel under attack. I soon realize, however, how insufficient my most fervent efforts and greatest allies truly are, when formed apart from Christ. But the moment I turn back to Him in faith, however, God fights on my behalf, makes up for my lack, and gives me everything I need to do all He’s asked, just as He did for ancient Israel when King Hezekiah humbled himself and turned to God.

Then, his soul was quieted and at peace, not panicked, rushed or confused.

Though choosing surrender, especially when the stakes seem high, can feel incredibly frightening, doing so places us in a position of power and strength. I’m reminding myself of this truth now as I am about to enter into a busy season, returning to school while writing, speaking, leading a ministry … When people ask how I’ll manage it all, I smile and say that I have an amazing team. And I do, but even more than that, we serve an amazing God. I know He will carry everything He wants to thrive. Therefore, whatever areas fall short must not be from Him, because He is big enough and strong enough to perfect all that concerns us.

All that concerns you as well.   

Let’s talk about this! What or who are you tempted to place your trust in? What might it look like for you to fully rely on Christ? Share your comments, thoughts, and examples with us in the comments below because we can all learn from and encourage one another.

Before you go (or listen to one of the podcast episodes embedded below) I have fun news. My latest Bible reading plan, Embracing Your True Self: Living in Your Christ-Centered Identity, is now available on the YouVersion Bible reading app.

From the plan’s description:

You’re not insufficient, overlooked, unimportant or unseen. In Christ, you are loved, chosen, called, redeemed, empowered and held close by the One who crafted your every cell, knows your every flaw, sees your potential. Unfortunately, wounds from our past can challenge our ability to view ourselves as the Lord’s beloved. May this 30-day plan remind you of who you are to Christ and in Christ, helping you live with increased confidence and joy.

Access it for free HERE. And, keep an eye out for more fun news that I’ll share in the near future!

https://www.lifeaudio.com/faith-over-fear/trusting-our-good-shepherd-jehovah-raah-to-lead-us-ep-66

Conversations in a hostile and polarized world

Sadly, I’ve hurt a lot of people in the name of Christ. More accurately, when I claim I’m furthering His mission but later discovered, when my thinking brain re-engaged, that I was actually working against His mission. And I’m in a strange place where I recognize the ugliness displayed by many Christ-followers while seeing myself in them. This happened again just the other day. While out to dinner with non-religious friends, they shared strong emotions related to a social media clip they’d watched in which an evangelist verbally wounded a college-aged rape victim.

Not wanting to receive second-hand information as fact, I went home and searched for the video. I never found it, but I did discover another, similar video that seemed to support our friend’s claims. Initially, I felt angry and indignant. Not long after, I felt convicted as the Lord reminded me of all the times my pride caused me to prioritize winning a discussion over protecting a relationship and my fear provoked defensiveness that prevented me from hearing the other person’s heart.

And sometimes still does. Each time a situation or conversation provokes a gut-reaction, I walk away with shame and regret. I suspect many of the Christ-followers I see fighting with others on social media feel the same. The Holy Spirit, our supernatural source of peace and love, resides within us, after all, inviting us to more consistently demonstrate the heart and mission of Christ who chose to die for the very people raising their fists against Him.

Jesus regularly demonstrated how to apply all of 1 Peter 3:15, which states,

“But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect” (NIV).

As a faith-based communicator, I’m comfortable sharing reasons for my faith. But as a recent Faith Over Fear guest so wisely stated the other day, how we share is equally important. And like I indicated at the beginning of this post, this is an area in which I want, and need, to grow.

Here’s how I’m working on this.

Practicing “the pause.”

You may remember this phrase from the graphics that circulated social media a year or so ago. I’ve combined this idea with what I’ve learned regarding neural plasticity. I’m practicing pausing for three seconds before responding in typical, low-stakes, conversations to dismantle the neural pathways in my brain that trigger reactivity while creating new, gentler channels more aligned with my core values.

The more I practice this in peaceful conversations, the easier it will feel to do the same when I feel more emotionally charged.  

Evaluating My Emotions

For years, I’d react first and process how I felt and why later. Obviously, this didn’t help me change my behavior. I’m learning, however, to recognize physical signs, like increased body temperature, an accelerated pulse, and a tight stomach, that indicate something evoked within me anxiety and fear. This allows me to seek God’s insight regarding the reason for my inner angst. Sometimes the root surprises me.

For example, a while ago an extended family member engaged me in a debate on religion. This person identifies as naturalistic atheist. Initially, the conversation felt pleasant and intellectually stimulating. Soon, however, my loved one became animated. Not hostile or rude but passionate. Unfortunately, the alarm center in my brain connected this with childhood wounds where caretakers became explosive and rejected me when I expressed a viewpoint contradictory to theirs.

Although I didn’t see the connection in the moment, once I prayerfully processed the situation, I understood my reaction came from past experiences, not the debate. I was then able to use this Spirit-led insight in future scenarios that threatened my subconscious.

Informing my emotions with relevant truth.

This is the Sunday school answer many of us learned in church. We’re taught to take our thoughts captive, to not let our feelings drive us, and to instead fix our minds on truth. But we want to focus on relevant truth. We need to understand our inner world, the lie stirring things up, and how it arose to refute it accurately and effectively. This includes more than reflecting on verses to consider evidence that contradicts our fear, such as the depth of our relationship with the person and their character and heart.

I want to be a peacemaker who accurately reflects my Savior and, through a perfect blend of love truth and grace, show just how good life with Him is. I recognize I still have much room for growth in this area. Thankfully, the Lord gave our brains the ability to change and fills our souls with the power to do so. I’m encouraged to know that the more I take in Christ’s love, the more His love will naturally flow from me, and the more I practice applying all of 1 Peter 3:15, the more natural it will feel to do so in the future.    

What do you find most helpful in regard to regulating your emotions and more consistently responding to uncomfortable discussions and events with love and grace? Share in the comments!

https://www.lifeaudio.com/faith-over-fear/the-dragon-prophesy-increasing-faith-through-biblical-prophesy

How Can we Let Christ’s Peace Rule Our Hearts?

I first wrote the below for the Crosswalk Devotional. I’m sharing it here with permission.

As someone prone to anxiety and who comes from a long line of worriers, I’m intrigued by the phrasing of Colossians 3:15, which reads:

 Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.

I find it interesting that Scripture doesn’t say “gain” or “discover” the peace of Christ. Instead, it tells us to allow His peace to control, to reign over, and to direct our hearts, the seat of our emotions and intellect. This suggests, even in my angsty moments, that I possess His peace.  

Scripture affirms this. Shortly before His death, knowing all His disciples would soon witness and experience, Jesus said He gave them His peace, indicating that it came not from their circumstances but instead, from Him. We’re also told, in Galatians 5:22 that the fruit, product, or result of the Spirit’s work in us is, among other things, peace.

When I combine these truths with the Bible’s directive to “let” God’s peace reign, I’m invited to consider ways in which I might be resisting this precious gift given me through my faith in Christ. Granted, I recognize there are numerous circumstances, from job loss to health challenges and unresolved trauma, that create worry and fear. I won’t diminish that. I also acknowledge the effect biology can play on our mental health. Yet, God has shown me, during some of my most unsettling seasons, how much of my anxiety stemmed from the state of my heart.

I can’t experience the peace of Christ while actively nursing a grudge or harboring bitterness. The more I ruminate on my offenses, the greater my angst. 

I “let” Christ’s peace rule as I follow the guidance recorded in today’s passage. Verse 1 tells me to focus on and prioritize those things of eternal value, which helps place today’s frustrations in proper perspective. Verses 5-10 tell me to “put to death” or turn from, sinful cravings and self-destructive behaviors. As I do, these “urges” lose their grip over me, making me less apt to hurt others and plunge into the pit of regret. 

Verse 12 reminds me of my secure standing as God’s child. Remembering that I’m His chosen and dearly loved daughter quiets the anxiety that leads to defensiveness. It also helps me rest in the knowledge that my Father has good planned for me and the power to bring His plans to pass. The more I receive His love and grace, the better I’m able to offer others, including those who have hurt me, these same transformative, healing gifts. 

Intersecting Life & Faith:

To summarize, based on the context surrounding Colossians 3:15, here are powerful ways we “let” the peace of Christ rule in our hearts: We intentionally and regularly focus on Christ, everything we have in Him, and all that awaits us in eternity. We don’t give in to or dwell on those things that pull our hearts from the thriving life for which we were created. We relate to others with honesty and integrity, living like the redeemed and empowered children of God we are. And we don’t hold on to and ruminate over past offenses.

Imagine the freedom we’d experience if we prayerfully read through Colossians 3 each night before we went to bed, inviting God to search and cleanse us of everything that steals our peace. And then ended our prayers speaking to ourselves as Colossians 3:16 instructs us to talk to one another—with hymns, songs, and thanksgiving. 

https://www.lifeaudio.com/faith-over-fear/

Remembering God’s Kindness in Hard Seasons-Guest post by Becky Harling

When life hurts, its easy to feel alone, forsaken and forgotten. We might even doubt God’s goodness. If you’re struggling to trust His heart, may today’s post, written by my sweet friend Becky Harling, encourage you and encourage you to find comfort in our always loving, kind, and ever-present Father.

Remembering God’s Kindness in Hard Seasons

by Becky Harling

Yesterday, I spent some time with a dear friend. We caught up and also spent time on our knees praying and worshipping. During our kneeling moments, listening to worship music and praying together, I was reminded of God’s kindness. My friend has faced many hardships—kids with cancer, a brain injury, and other challenges. Yet, her life reflects consistency in her spiritual walk. Linda is always drawn back to the kindness of God.

I know many of you are walking right now through difficult circumstances. I have heard from you and have been praying for you. God sees you and hears the cries of your heart.

This morning, as I was reading through several Psalms for the day, I was struck by the fact that when life feels challenging, we need to remind ourselves of the kindness of God. In Psalm 145 and 146, there are three reminders of God’s kindness that we need to cling to when life goes awry.

3 Reminders of God’s Kindness

The LORD is gracious and compassionate (Psalm 145:8).
Amid trying circumstances, it’s easy to forget that God’s heart is gracious and compassionate. Our circumstances might scream at us otherwise. But the Lord is tender toward us. He longs to love us in our sorrow. I have found that I need to remind myself of God’s gracious and compassionate nature. How do I do that? I praise Him with the tiny bit of faith I have that He is good, even though life doesn’t feel good. I also write down in my journal glimpses of God’s compassion. I get on my knees and listen to worship music that reminds me of God’s grace and compassion. I allow myself to borrow the faith of those who are leading the worship song, and I ask the Holy Spirit to rekindle my faith in His goodness.

The LORD remains faithful forever (Psalm 146:6).
At times, we need to declare this out loud. As we speak it with our mouths, our ears hear it, and it takes deeper root in our souls. When you are doubting God’s faithfulness, look back. Remember how He has been faithful in the past. The worship of remembrance will strengthen your faith for today. I can’t count how many times in my life, when the unexpected happens, I have looked back and remembered, “God has been faithful before. He will be faithful in this.”

The LORD is trustworthy in all of His promises (Psalm 145:13).
Paul echoed this in the New Testament when he wrote to the believers in Corinth, “For no matter how many promises God has made, they are ‘yes’ in Christ” (2 Corinthians 1:20). God is faithful to keep His promises. You can trust Him. When life feels challenging, make a list of some of the promises God has made. Make sure those promises are grounded in Scripture and not your imagination. But then cling to those promises and dare to praise God that He will fulfill them all.

Friend, I feel like in this season we need to reaffirm our faith in the kindness of God. No matter what’s going on in the world or in your life specifically, God’s nature has not changed. He is good, loving, and kind. Dare to believe it this week!

Get to Know Becky Harling

A best-selling author, Becky Harling has written 16 books. She is a popular speaker at conferences, retreats and other events. Becky is a John Maxwell leadership and communications coach. She has been a guest on many media outlets including Focus on the Family, Family Life Today, 100 Huntley Street, Moody Radio and the Total Christ Television Today Show.  Becky is the host of, The Connected Mom Podcast and loves encouraging other moms to connect more intentionally.  She loves hiking with her husband, playing with her 14 grandkids, shopping with her daughters, hanging out with her son and having coffee with friends!

Visit her on her website and follow her on Instagram, Facebook, and her Amazon author page.

Check Out Her Book, Cultivating Deeper Connections in a Lonely World:

Loneliness is an epidemic, but you can live life with a deep sense of belonging.

If you’ve ever felt that ache to connect and belong, you’re not alone: three out of every five people are suffering from loneliness. No group is excluded—married, unmarried, parents, pastors, leaders, elderly, and teenagers. We all experience moments . . . or long seasons of heart-aching loneliness. And it hurts. It can hurt right to the core.

In Cultivating Deeper Connections in a Lonely World, relationship expert, mother, grandmother, and John Maxwell Certified Coach Becky Harling taps into the deep ache of loneliness and shares with readers a rich theology of belonging. Does God ache for us? What does it mean that we belong to Him? How do we establish a deeply bonded relationship with others? What steps can we take to improve our relationships?

Because we were made for God and for community, relational isolation or brokenness is incredibly painful. But we don’t have to live isolated and unconnected. In fact, we must not. Our souls were designed for more. Deeply rooted in Scripture and joined with reflection questions, this book shows us how we can strengthen our relationships and experience deep connection.

Grab your copy HERE.

https://www.lifeaudio.com/faith-over-fear/

When it feels like even the wind is against you – guest post by Dr. Gladys Childs

When It Feels Like Even the Wind Is Against You

by Dr. Gladys Childs

You’re doing all the right things, but life still feels like a battle. You’re rowing, striving, praying, pressing forward. But the wind is against you. The resistance is real, and it’s relentless. You keep asking, “Why is this so hard if I’m following Jesus?”

Mark 6 tells the story of the disciples caught in a storm. It wasn’t a storm they wandered into by rebellion. Jesus Himself sent them into that boat. They were obeying. And yet the wind howled, the waters churned, and their progress stalled. Here’s what most miss: they were straining with all their strength, and Jesus saw them.

Let that settle in your spirit. He saw them straining and didn’t miss their suffering or effort. Jesus watched from the shore, not with apathy but with intention. He recognized the pain of obedience and the tension they felt from following His command while feeling stagnant. Such obedience, painful and slow, doesn’t go unnoticed by Heaven.

God sometimes waits not out of indifference, but to build something during the delay that wouldn’t be possible in ease. The disciples had witnessed Jesus calm a storm before, but this time He walked into it first.

It was the fourth watch of the night, the final stretch before dawn, when Jesus came. That’s the darkest hour, the moment most people give up. The time when your body is exhausted and your hope starts to flicker. And maybe, you’re in that hour right now.

But that’s when Jesus shows up, not waving a wand and not stopping the wind instantly. He comes walking on the very thing that threatened them. The waves that terrified the disciples became the pavement for His feet. What overwhelms you never overwhelms Him.

And Jesus could have stilled the storm from the shore. One word, one wave of His hand, and the sea would’ve gone silent. But He came closer instead. Because sometimes what your heart needs, more than immediate relief, is Jesus.

Jesus didn’t shout advice from afar; He joined the struggling disciples in their boat, calming the winds in that sacred moment. God doesn’t just focus on fixing our situations; He works to strengthen our faith. He’s not in a hurry to end the storm if it means deepening our connection with Him.

You may be in the fourth watch right now. The darkness is long. The winds haven’t let up. You’re still rowing, and it’s costing you more than anyone knows. Take heart: the One who sees is already on His way. And He’s not waiting for you to figure it out or fix yourself. Jesus comes near in the struggle.

Get to know Gladys Childs

About the Author: As the ‘Truth Doctor,’ Gladys meets people where faith and life collide—offering clarity, hope, and practical wisdom. As a pastor’s wife, author, speaker, former religion professor, and boy mom, I step into the mess where faith feels fragile, and pain runs deep, helping others find unshakable faith and lasting freedom. Learn more at gladyschilds.com. Follow on Instagram or Facebook.

Check out her book, Busting Barriers:

Whispering aches, a cavern craving meaning and purpose within you. There are barriers you can’t seem to move past. But you have the power to overcome them.

It’s time to shatter the barriers holding you back and boldly step into the abundant life God designed for you. “Busting Barriers: Overcome Emptiness & Unleash Fruitful Living” is not just another self-help book; it’s a transformative journey towards a deeper connection with God and a life filled with lasting joy.

This 45-day devotional, the first of a three-part series, is a guide to breaking through psychological barriers that keep us from living out the fruits of the Spirit. With scripture, practical application, self-affirmation statements, reflection, and guided journaling, you’ll be equipped to overcome the obstacles to achieving fruitful living and relationships.

Don’t settle for a life of emptiness and unfullfillment. Embrace self-care, spiritual transformation, and the fullness of God’s blessings. It’s time to start Busting Barriers and unleash fruitful living.

https://www.lifeaudio.com/faith-over-fear/

Living Unafraid in the Storms of Life – Guest Post by Grace Fox

(Note: This first posted on July 11, 2024.)

Living Unafraid in the Storms of Life

by Grace Fox

The bus on which I was a passenger cruised east through the rugged Rocky Mountains before turning north. We drove through miles of rolling sage-covered hills and acres of evergreens charred by recent forest fires, past lakes and log cabins, and alongside rivers and expansive ranches where cattle grazed.

I’d traveled this road more than fifteen times and always marveled at the scenery’s beauty, but this time I saw something different: ominous black clouds. I’ve seen rain clouds many times in my life, but they never looked like this. These hovered menacingly over the horizon like a big, bad bully daring us to approach. The only way to reach our destination is to drive through the deluge, I thought.

The likeness to our life’s journey astounded me. At some point, we all face those ominous black clouds, and we have no option but to drive through the storm: the loss of a loved one, an unexpected medical diagnosis, financial troubles, infertility, and betrayal, to name a few.

None of us choose that route. We’d all rather take a detour than drive through the onslaught. But here’s the good news: God’s children don’t go through it alone. And we can be confident this is true because of who God is.

God manifested various aspects of His character to mankind through His Hebrew names. Each name is like a facet on a cut diamond, reflecting a specific characteristic that gives us a glimpse of His glory and a better understanding of what He’s like. One of these names is Yahweh Shammah (pronounced “SHAHM-mah”). It’s found in Ezekiel 48:35 and means, “The LORD is there” (NASB).

It’s easy to read the meaning and say a simple, “That’s nice.” But, my friend, these words deserve more than a quick nod. Their truth contains the power we need to face the storm with courage that, no matter what it looks like, God is with us.

For instance, “the LORD” points to the one true God. There is no other like Him. He is the creator of heaven and earth. He alone is holy, mighty in power, and perfect in wisdom. He alone is sovereign over every detail of our lives. This is the one who is with us. It doesn’t get better than that.

The wee word “is” declares God as present tense. Because of who He is, the LORD has no expiration date. He existed from before time began, and He’s still present and relevant for us today just as He’ll be present and relevant for the generations yet to come.

“There” suggests everywhere. Look around—to the north, south, east, west. Look in your closet and under your bed. Stand in a valley and gaze at the hilltops above you. Look out an airplane window at the expanse 36,000 feet beneath you. Where is God? He is there.

“The LORD is there” sounds so simple, but it’s profound. When our life’s journey leads us around a bend where ominous clouds hover, God is already there, so we never need fear going through the storm alone. Of this we can be confident because of who He is—Yahweh Shammah.

Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. Psalm 139:7-10 NIV

***

I recently interviewed Grace on finding courage through the names of God on the Faith Over Fear podcast. That episode will drop on the 16th. Watch for it! I know Grace’s insights will encourage you and strengthen your faith!

Get to Know Grace Fox:

Grace Fox is the award-winning author of 14 books and a popular Bible teacher at international women’s events. She’s also a member of the “First 5” Bible study writing team (Proverbs 31 Ministries), and a co-host of the “Your Daily Bible Verse” podcast. Her latest book, Names of God: Living Unafraid comes with video access and makes an ideal group study, taking readers into a deeper understanding of seven of God’s Hebrew names.

Grace has been a career missionary for more than 30 years. She and her husband have worked in Nepal, at a year-round Christian camp on an island off Canada’s west coast, and are now co-directors of International Messengers Canada, a missionary sending agency with 300 staff in more than 25 countries. They currently live fulltime aboard a sailboat in Vancouver, British Columbia. Married in 1982, they celebrate three grown kids and 14 grandchildren.

Visit her on her website, on Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, and follow her on her Amazon page.

Grace’s Latest Release, :

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Get refreshed and equipped with seven powerful names of God in this highly engaging and interactive devotional study (with FREE guided video content from the author)! Packed with fresh insights, word studies, cultural context, thought-provoking reflections, and practical action steps, these studies will give you a solid understanding of God’s character so you can find peace and hope amidst life’s toughest moments.

Our world is a scary place. Focusing on the chaos can paralyze us with fear, but instead, we can anchor ourselves in the truth of who God is, and live unafraid. The Living Unafraid devotional study will help you build an unshakeable foundation of trust in God by empowering you with God’s character as revealed through his names in Scripture. Each of the seven chapters in this devotional study book explores:

A powerful name of God (including pronunciation, scripture reference, translation, prayer, and a word study)FREE accompanying video insights, accessible online (optional)Key background information, in-depth overviews, and cultural contextFresh insights, practical action steps, and eye-opening reflections questionsAnd so much more!

How to Use the Names of God :   Living Unafraid Book & Video Study

Buy it .

https://www.lifeaudio.com/faith-over-fear/