Vaughn R. Demont's Blog, page 28

From Twitter 11-28-2010

14:15:43: @darkonfire Indeed. MP3s cannot beat a mix tape. You cannot approach someone you're crushing on and sheepishly say you made them a playlist.
23:31:51: Hit some financial troubles. Anyone want my Invader Zim Boxed Set? Only watched once! http://tinyurl.com/37qtknn

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From Twitter 11-27-2010

11:11:14: @editorannescott Chuck is a great show, and yeah, Casey is like Jayne: Establishment Edition. :)

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From Twitter 11-26-2010

00:55:14: Free Fiction Friday: The King's Confidante - Part 28 http://j.mp/eIvoIk
09:48:05: The Inside Reader: Vaughn R. Demont http://t.co/RXP4yCK

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Check Out The Inside Reader Today!

I was asked by the incomparable elisa_rolle to contribute for her ongoing feature The Inside Reader and discuss some of my influences in writing Urban Fantasy. I'm deeply honored to have this opportunity and to share the stage even for a second with so many distinguished authors who've shared their lists as well. :)

From Twitter 11-25-2010

10:03:59: Happy Turkpocalypse Everyone! To everyone outside the US, well, uh... Happy Thursday!!!! Hugs to all my friends and fans. :)

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Free Fiction Friday: The King's Confidante - Part 28

x-posted to freeficfriday

Welcome back to Free Fiction Friday!

This week's chapter is average length, coming in at 3000 words, and Spence has crossed the 95k mark!

The archive for the freeficfriday community is up to date, so if you've been looking for where you can read all of the FFF material from all of the participating authors in one place, you're set. :)

Everything's tagged according to author, title, and genre for easier reading, but if you prefer to stick with Spence on my blog, just click the "free fiction fridays" tag if you need to catch up.

This week's posting roster consists of: Vaughn R. Demont vaughn_r_demont , I.D. Locke id_locke , and our newest Fictioneer, David M. Demar david_m_demar !

Interested in joining the Free Fictioneers? We have weekly and bi-weekly slots open for interested authors. For more information, please send any inquiries to the moderators vaughn_r_demont and/or id_locke

Anyway, without further ado, please enjoy this week's chapter of "The King's Confidante". :)



Obviously, I don't go to school today. This would usually mean I'd head down to Tolon Avenue, drop by the coffee shop that all of the college kids spend their mornings at and just blend in for an hour or so, sipping espresso and nibbling a four dollar brownie while I warm up my hands with some quick pickups and culls. Sometimes I'll just do the card tricks I know, which usually pays for the coffee and brownie, and keep looking innocuous while I'd wait for Bank to show up so we could cross the street and find a spot to set up.

That reminds me, I need to call him and see if "James" got to the Capital okay.

But right now, well, I might as well be in school.

"Okay, could you try that again? Only a little, uh, slower?"

I'm at the aforementioned coffee shop, seated on one of the couches, my espresso and brownie on a nearby table, being used for positive reinforcement. It turns out that if I'm going to sell being a sorcerer to a former sorcerer, I need to talk the talk more than walk the walk. They apparently have their own language, Lorus, and it doesn't make a damned lick of sense. Rourke is trying to teach me, and every time I get a word right…

Well, the fact that my espresso is room temperature and my brownie is going stale should be some indicator of my progress.

Seriously, what the fuck is a "soft K"?

"If I speak any more slowly, Spencer, I'll be talking backwards." Rourke takes a moment to hap a sip of his own coffee, and a bite of scone. Asshole.

"This is the thing, when you say the words, I hear them in English and when I say them, I sound like I need a tin-foil hat." I reach for my brownie, but it's snatched away quickly by a new hand, black furred, a bit of white showing under a blouse cuff.

Shiko takes a bite of it, and nods approvingly. "How's it going?"

Rourke sighs, stretching. "I've long known that Coyotes were considered fools. I just didn't take the meaning to be so literal. What have you discovered on your reconnaissance?"

Shiko takes a seat while I fume quietly. When I try to sneak my espresso her hand quickly slaps mine away. "Well, a large portion of the clientele seems to think that you're a new linguistics professor and that Spencer here is sleeping his way to a grade."

Rourke hmms at that a moment. "Well, I have been to university, several times, actually. I suppose it could be a nice switch from selling cars. I'll have to keep it in mind." He smiles to me. "Think I could pull it off?"

"You, in a suit, in a position of authority, with that accent?" I make a move to cover my groin with a magazine from the table. "Christ, I'd go into student loan debt for that." I then look to Shiko. "I think he was asking about the other recon, though."

"You wouldn't go into debt for me?" She puts on a face of mock indignation, complete with a hand delicately pressed to her heart.

"Shiko, you're a hot Asian girl, any guy would go into debt for you." I pat my jacket nonchalantly to drive the point home, and she nods once.

Shiko takes another nibble off my brownie, and then sits on the table to face us both. "When Justin spoke to me last night, I shadowed him to where he met a woman I can only assume was the mark, considering she held some sway over him. Another Coyote was with them—"

"Was it Thornton?" I then remember that more than likely Shiko and Thornton have never met, so I describe him as best I can.

Shiko sighs softly, clearly not enjoying having been interrupted. "No, this one was taller, broader. This one was holding the urn into a small crypt and remained to stand guard. I would suppose he'll be there at Sunset Grove all day."

Rourke arches a brow. "You shadowed him out that far? And you weren't seen?"

This time her indignation isn't the mock kind. I was going to ask the same question but the glare she gives Rourke gives me the idea that Shiko is the kind of person who can, as the story goes, vanish into shadow on a cloudless day. Besides, Sunset Grove?

"A cemetery?" I chuckle, but the pitch is a bit higher than I expected. "At night? With a full moon? Um… did you see any, uh, zombies, you know, while you were there?"

Shiko blinks at me a few times. "No."

I let out a sigh of relief. "Thank god. I mean, I don't want to be the first to die. The funny guy always dies first, for shock value, you know. Rourke would get killed next, because it'd be a heroic sacrifice or something." I motion to Shiko. "You'd live, though, unless you had sex."

Rourke and Shiko are now looking at me as if I'd admitted that I was keeping trained wolverines in my pants and that were about to brew up some chamomile tea.

"What?" I look between them. "It can happen at any time, okay?"

Shiko now has the look of an addled kitten, complete with head tilt. Rourke sighs and leans toward her, slightly embarrassed.

"You'll have to excuse him. According to his mother he has an irrational fear of something called the 'zombie apocalypse'."

"It's not irrational!" My turn to be indignant. Seriously, think about all the medical and scientific breakthroughs coupled with the might of the military-industrial complex and toss in the idea of weaponizing a zombie plague. After that all you need is one butterfingered lab tech and you'll be wishing you had a stockpile of k-rations and ammunition.

Shiko just stares at me a few seconds before turning back to Rourke. "Moving on. I didn't see a third Coyote, more than likely he's being held at another location."

Rourke nods once. "And we could scour the City looking for him, but I doubt we'd find him. Did it appear that they were preparing for a ritual at the cemetery?"

"Looked like it. I made a map, got a few places I can set up depending where Spence here wants to put on the show." She then looks at me, then back at Rourke. "How's he coming along, anyway?"

Rourke sighs disappointedly. "I am now well aware of why his schooling requires supplemental assistance."

"I just suck at learning from lecture, okay? And I have an excellent vocabulary, don't make me kick your ass at Scrabble to prove it."

Rourke snorts derisively, and I get up off the couch in a huff, stomping off toward a shelf where they do, in fact, have several board games including Scrabble. I return to the couch and practically drop it on the table. "Grab some tiles, pick 'em at random."

"We don't have time for this, Spencer." Rourke is giving me a look, as we've now drawn a little attention. Shiko, on the other hand looks intrigued, and starts to gather several of the wooden tiles from the box, and lays them out for me, face down.

I lean down and turn them over, studying them. X-T-I-Q-O-Y-R-U

Fuck.

I start to separate them, but Shiko's finger wags in front of me. "Uh uh. If you're going to throw down the gauntlet, you're going to use them all."

I close my eyes a moment, then look at the board. Okay, just think like you're going for a big score, and you need to build off a letter. R's always good for that. But Christ, a Q and an X in the same word? There's only…

"I got it." I quickly move the tiles about, imagining them leading the holy grail of Scrabble: the triple-triple bingo. "Quixotry. A rash action, taken from Don Quixote." I hear some clapping from the crowd.

I expect Rourke to be looking defeated, but instead he looks interested now. "How did you do that?"

Shaking my head quickly, I sit back down on the couch. "I think it's like a golf swing, you know? The second I really stop to examine how I do it to explain it to someone, I won't be able to do it anymore." I shrug once. "It's just something I do. I look at the letters, and the word just jumps out at me. After that I usually check the dictionary to be sure." I rub my face again. "I still don't get Lorus, though."

Shiko gives a look to Rourke, "You're actually teaching him Lorus? The Coyotes hardly need to know—"

"You believe Fate would ever allow them magic, Kitsune? Besides, I'm teaching him a sentence, not the entire language." Rourke says, matter-of-fact'ly. "And I'm free to help him learn it. Unlike some clans, my people were taught Lorus, rather than stealing it."

Shiko can tell she's being baited, and replies with a shark smile. "Perhaps, those people wanted to learn it without having to be lapdogs to Ra'keth."

I put my hand between the two of them. "Okay, time out. There's still a truce on and running clock. Like Rourke said, I'm learning, like, a sentence. Phonetically. I don't even know what it means, really. Rourke could be giving me the Lorus translation of the last thing you should ever say to a woman."

Shiko glances toward me. "Which is?"

I shrug, chuckling, and try to pick out the various phonetics that Rourke's been spouting at me all morning to no avail. I think of the Scrabble tiles, the weird G's and soft K's and flexible Y's lining up into words that would reap dozens of points. No luck there, so I answer Shiko's question. "I can't talk to you when you're emotional like this."

Both of them stare dead at me, and I wince. "Okay, I'll admit, it's kind of sexist, but you should hear some of the blonde jokes I know." Rourke's mouth drops slightly, Shiko looks a cross between angry and afraid. "Okay, okay, it's a lot sexist. I'm sorry, okay?"

Rourke then places his hands on my shoulders, and proceeds to produce a stream of phonetic sounds that sound like gibberish. A second later, he switches to English. "What did I say?"

Shiko's attention is fully on me, just as impatiently awaiting my answer as Rourke.

I swallow hard, looking between them. "I don't know. Why are you mad?"

"That was perfect Lorus, Phouk." Shiko pushes Rourke backward gently, getting in his face. "What have you been teaching him?"

Huh? "No it wasn't." I make a move to get between them again. "Seriously, you two, public place, let's not make a scene."

"He's a Bard, Fox. Plain and simple. A bard must tell his stories, no matter the language barrier. Granted, it's a talent I thought exclusive to the Bards of my clan, but Fate has her own agenda, of course. " He uses his salesman smile on her. "If you don't believe me, speak a few phrases in your language, see if he can tell a joke or two."

Her gaze then settles on me, and she proceeds to speak Japanese, I would guess, rapid-fire. She studies my face intently for a second afterward. "You didn't understand a word of that."

I shake my head.

"All right then…" She smirks. "Bard. Tell me a funny story."

"Um, did you hear the one about the blonde coyote?"

Now she shows teeth. "Nihongo."

How the Hell did the situation get like this? I was speaking English before, right? What, am I speaking in tongues now?

Still though, I can sort of see the phonetics of what she was saying in my head, not really Scrabble tiles this time, just… I don't know. Rhythms?

"What did the blonde say when the doctor told her she was pregnant?"

Shiko just looks at me, not speaking.

"Is it mine?" Wait a minute. That wasn't English. "Hold on a tick."

"So he can speak the languages, he just can't understand them." Shiko politely covers her mouth, giggling. "Oh, Spencer, that is going to get you into all manner of trouble. Especially considering you come across like an idiot tourist who drunkenly memorized a phrase book."

"I was speaking Japanese?"

"Quite badly, but yes." She looks around to the crowd, who have all returned to their coffee. "Sometimes I wonder what they hear us talking about."

Rourke seems to have calmed a bit, appraising me still. "I beginning to believe there might be a little truth to the lie that Spencer told his father."

Shiko immediately turns back to Rourke at that. "You don't think he's actually…"

"No, of course not, but I do believe that in order to have Spencer turn out like he did, he had to be a bit more special than intended." Rourke then finishes his coffee, and sets the cup on the table.

I raise my hand. "Still confused."

Rourke nudges my espresso toward me, and gratefully, I start drinking it. It's cold, but still, after the night I've had I need caffeine. Seriously, I'm going to sleep for a week when this is done.

"I do believe, Spencer, that you were conceived at a specific time in a specific way—"

"Specific way? Please, no details, I don't want to imagine my parents having kinky sex, okay?" Shuddering visibly, I continue to drink my espresso, hoping the slightly nasty taste will serve as a weak mind-bleach.

"Positions have little to do with it, Spencer. The stars, the weather, the presence of music, where specifically the act was, and…" Rourke smiles knowingly. "Whether conception actually took place."

Shiko ahhs softly, but I'm still confused. She chuckles dubiously at me. "I for one know that you passed Sex Ed." She then looks at Rourke. "Had his school record checked out, before you go getting all jealous."

"I still don't get it. What, I wasn't conceived at that specific time, that's what you're saying?" I look at the crowd. "Is this really the place to have this conversation?"

Rourke shrugs. "Humans. They hear what they want. And there are a few possibilities. While conception was largely a mystery in those days, humanity has all sorts of ways to science it out."

"Science isn't a verb."

"What I'm saying, Spencer, it appears that what worked once doesn't quite work anymore. If everything had gone to plan, you would be as you are, only subservient to your Lady and powerless to resist her. Instead, you were born a Bard as well as a half-blood."

So I think it through, trying to remember what little I do from Sex Ed, outside of abstinence being the only effective means of birth control and giving myself testicular exams. "Okay… For the sake of my sanity, let's call our participants Man A and Woman B, all right?" I take a deep breath, trying to imagine two featureless mannequins in the place of my parents. "Man A has intercourse with Woman B."

In my head the male mannequin just falls on top of the female.

"When that happens," I say, my voice gravitating toward high school regurgitation. In my head it switches from mannequins to a bad Sixties filmstrip complete with cheesy marching music playing in the background. "Sperm is ejaculated into Woman B, entering through the cervix into the uterus where it makes its way to the fallopian tubes. Either on the way, or in the fallopian tubes, they hit an egg and fertilize it, and that's conception. At least, I think that's how it works, I only got a C in that class." I figure I'm done, but then I remember a question from a pop quiz. "But it doesn't happen immediately. Ovulation might not have occurred but the sperm can live in the uterus for a day, maybe two, three on the outside, so…"

I got it.

"So no matter how much planning you put into the special conception time, it's going to happen when it's going to happen. It's in the hands of Fate." I look at Rourke. "And Fate doesn't seem like the kind of lady who'd want someone telling her exactly when to spin a thread. Now how do I use that?" I look between the two of them. "Seriously, I'm open to ideas here."

"Fate abhors nothing more than a sorcerer." Shiko stands, stretching, and smiling when she notices me watching. "But even she knows that sometimes the only means of stopping one Ra'keth is to raise up another. Sorcerers are removed from the loom of fate the moment they ascend to power, but what's to stop Fate from setting them on the correct path beforehand? They are, after all, human, and are just as easily led as Coyotes."

"Okay, I do have a decent vocabulary, but I am still flunking a lot of my classes." I glare at Shiko. "No thanks to someone."

She pats my face patronizingly. "Oh, you wouldn't last a day in Tokyo. I'd almost pay the airfare myself just to see it. Regardless though, your original trick still has a chance, if I aid you, but even then I doubt you'd be able to say what's necessary in Lorus. Even if you can spout it off like an idiot-savant, you still won't know what to say."

I look to Rourke. "He'd know what to say, so we can just do a Cyrano." They both appear to mull it over, before gently nodding to each other and me, though Rourke looks mildly surprised. "What? I do read occasionally."

Well, not the book, but that's what Wikipedia is for, and they've done it on TV a few times and it always turns out okay.

At least I think it does.

Fuck.


To be continued next Friday!


And that's it. I'm going to bed. :)

From Twitter 11-24-2010

09:52:14: How do I keep getting picked to be a pallbearer? Is this part of the difference between Honorary Goth and True Goth?
21:24:59: Finally home. Back to work.

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From Twitter 11-23-2010

00:54:21: Chapter 29 is done. Sitting at just under 95k. I think I'm 4-5 chapters from the end, for real this time. #kingsconfidante
09:21:58: Just for laughs, let's see how far I get into chapter 30 today. #kingsconfidante
09:42:03: I'm more popular in England? Really? Even though I spell everything wrong? #gradschoolwasright?

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From Twitter 11-21-2010

12:47:38: @neilhimself Have to admit that there'd be a great story in that, though.
18:55:51: @mythicfox Maybe not easier, but you'd have a lot of stories to make up for it, as long as you're not a blackout drunk, that is.
19:06:28: However briefly it may last, House of Stone's in the top 100 gay novels bestseller list! Woooo! http://t.co/ff7WEVI via @amazon
20:01:02: I think I just figured out the ending. Now to get to it without any significant detours. #kingsconfidante

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From Twitter 11-20-2010

23:22:22: Ok, that's it. I'm getting a McRib, making some tea, and I'm not getting up until the next chapter is started. #kingsconfidante

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