Ceara Comeau's Blog: Lessons From A Struggling Writer - Posts Tagged "patience"
Pick Your Battles
Picture this: You are juggling four projects; all are pretty time sensitive. One happens to be your writing, which takes most of your time whether it’s the actual writing or marketing. Then you have a small personal project on the side that ideally, you want to be done at a certain time. But along with those two things, you are tasked with two big volunteer projects that not only take more time than you expected but in some ways ask more from you than you’d like.
Now, if you’re like me. You might have initially thought that you could handle all projects and get them done on time with no struggles, despite the fact you also have a number of events to attend the month the volunteer projects are due. In a fantasy world, this would be realistic, but not this in one. That’s something I had to find out the hard way.
You see, a few weeks back, I was talking to a writer friend at an event regarding some of the situations that I’d been dealing with regarding one of the volunteer situations. He smiled at me and nodded his head, seemingly reflecting back on his own past. He said to me, “Congratulations, you’ve graduated to [Senior] author! Many authors are stuck in that [honeymoon] phase.”
I laughed quite a bit at this and felt so much relief that I wasn’t alone and this was normal. That’s not to say doing volunteer work is bad, it’s great! But it becomes a problem when you spread yourself so thin that, like me, you put your real work; the work that pays the bills, off to the side. I came to a point where I put away my writing, reading, and stuff that made me happy just to help other people. I know this goes without saying, but that’s not the right way to go about things.
If you’re in a position where people are coming to you for volunteer work or help or something that could potentially put your primary goals/work off to the side. It’s perfectly acceptable to say, “No thank you, I’m not interested.”
The unplanned projects, and at times the consequences of some, put me so far back, that even my emotions and energy were drained. I literally had to force myself to stop and do something that made me happy. And let me tell you, that was a challenge. I love to help and encourage people, but I can’t do that if I don’t respect myself enough to know when enough is enough. That I have too much on my plate.
You might not be a writer or an artist of any sort. Maybe you’re a business person or work as a cashier. This kind of situation applies to anyone of any age. Choose your battles wisely. Know what your limits are and don’t do what I did and try to convince yourself that you can push just a bit farther. It’s unhealthy and in the long run, it will wear you down.
Now, if you’re like me. You might have initially thought that you could handle all projects and get them done on time with no struggles, despite the fact you also have a number of events to attend the month the volunteer projects are due. In a fantasy world, this would be realistic, but not this in one. That’s something I had to find out the hard way.
You see, a few weeks back, I was talking to a writer friend at an event regarding some of the situations that I’d been dealing with regarding one of the volunteer situations. He smiled at me and nodded his head, seemingly reflecting back on his own past. He said to me, “Congratulations, you’ve graduated to [Senior] author! Many authors are stuck in that [honeymoon] phase.”
I laughed quite a bit at this and felt so much relief that I wasn’t alone and this was normal. That’s not to say doing volunteer work is bad, it’s great! But it becomes a problem when you spread yourself so thin that, like me, you put your real work; the work that pays the bills, off to the side. I came to a point where I put away my writing, reading, and stuff that made me happy just to help other people. I know this goes without saying, but that’s not the right way to go about things.
If you’re in a position where people are coming to you for volunteer work or help or something that could potentially put your primary goals/work off to the side. It’s perfectly acceptable to say, “No thank you, I’m not interested.”
The unplanned projects, and at times the consequences of some, put me so far back, that even my emotions and energy were drained. I literally had to force myself to stop and do something that made me happy. And let me tell you, that was a challenge. I love to help and encourage people, but I can’t do that if I don’t respect myself enough to know when enough is enough. That I have too much on my plate.
You might not be a writer or an artist of any sort. Maybe you’re a business person or work as a cashier. This kind of situation applies to anyone of any age. Choose your battles wisely. Know what your limits are and don’t do what I did and try to convince yourself that you can push just a bit farther. It’s unhealthy and in the long run, it will wear you down.
Be Kind
Events canceled, sales dropping, and creativity plummeting. For most of us writers and artists, this sounds like a typical day in 2020. We’re all still working on our craft, whatever it may be, but for some of my fellow “vendor” friends, they have had to close up shop as their work was their only means of paying the bills.
I gotta tell you, that was a hard thing to hear from one event this year. And I felt very sad for those individuals. It got me thinking about my own work and what I do. Now, if you’ve been following my blog posts, you probably already know that writing isn’t my main job. It’s something I do on the side. For the longest time, I wanted it to be a full-time thing (which I’m still striving for), but this year has really re-confirmed a valuable lesson. It’s okay to have a 9-5 to support your dreams.
This was the HARDEST lesson for me to learn. And, again with past blogs, I’m sure I’ve mentioned this before. But what I haven’t mentioned is how grateful I am to have this job. I’ve been working in retail part-time for a year and recently have been promoted to a manager position for full-time work. This year has got me realizing just how lucky I am. Yes, some days are better than others, but that’s how it is in life, whether you’re working that 9-5 or working on your craft.
“So, how’s your writing going?” I get asked this question a lot. Some days I guiltily reply, “It’s slow.” (which is code for…writing? What writing? Oh yeah, I do that whole pen and paper thing.”) Then, there are other days, where I’ll be writing several paragraphs down and I’m so proud of myself.
Guys, the world we live in right now is a challenging one, to say the least, regardless of your occupation. What my rambling is trying to convey is…don’t do what I did at the beginning of all this. Be patient with yourself in what your dreams are. It’s okay if your book, painting, or composition isn’t done as quickly as the last one. I guarantee you that no one out there is counting down the seconds until your art is done (unless you have a commission due in a week and you haven’t started sketches…that’s an entirely different story and I can’t help you there). People will understand if you’re a little behind and I’m not saying that because as I write this I feel behind.
We all have lives outside of our projects and 9-5, you just have to remember to be gentle and kind with yourself. After all, your emotions will show in your work!
I gotta tell you, that was a hard thing to hear from one event this year. And I felt very sad for those individuals. It got me thinking about my own work and what I do. Now, if you’ve been following my blog posts, you probably already know that writing isn’t my main job. It’s something I do on the side. For the longest time, I wanted it to be a full-time thing (which I’m still striving for), but this year has really re-confirmed a valuable lesson. It’s okay to have a 9-5 to support your dreams.
This was the HARDEST lesson for me to learn. And, again with past blogs, I’m sure I’ve mentioned this before. But what I haven’t mentioned is how grateful I am to have this job. I’ve been working in retail part-time for a year and recently have been promoted to a manager position for full-time work. This year has got me realizing just how lucky I am. Yes, some days are better than others, but that’s how it is in life, whether you’re working that 9-5 or working on your craft.
“So, how’s your writing going?” I get asked this question a lot. Some days I guiltily reply, “It’s slow.” (which is code for…writing? What writing? Oh yeah, I do that whole pen and paper thing.”) Then, there are other days, where I’ll be writing several paragraphs down and I’m so proud of myself.
Guys, the world we live in right now is a challenging one, to say the least, regardless of your occupation. What my rambling is trying to convey is…don’t do what I did at the beginning of all this. Be patient with yourself in what your dreams are. It’s okay if your book, painting, or composition isn’t done as quickly as the last one. I guarantee you that no one out there is counting down the seconds until your art is done (unless you have a commission due in a week and you haven’t started sketches…that’s an entirely different story and I can’t help you there). People will understand if you’re a little behind and I’m not saying that because as I write this I feel behind.
We all have lives outside of our projects and 9-5, you just have to remember to be gentle and kind with yourself. After all, your emotions will show in your work!
Magical Writers
At some point, all of us have seen memes on Facebook that show magic coming from an open book. But, it’s a little bit misleading if you ask me. Books are certainly magic, that’s definitely true, but it’s honestly just the result. The true magic comes from the writer—whose raw imagination developed the literary worlds we fall in love with.
Unlike the magic from Harry Potter, writing magic doesn’t always come with just a flick of one’s wand. Writing comes with a lot of patience, practice, and listening to one’s inner voice. (Sorry, I couldn’t come up with another “p” word.)
So, how do you know if the magic of writing is REALLY working? When the story starts writing itself.
Let me give you an example from my latest writing project. For the last several months I’ve been working on the third book of my trilogy. Now, to be honest, I dreaded this book because of its level of difficulty. Half of this book is written from the perspective of the villain of the trilogy, which also happens to be the creation of the main villains of my entire universe. Now, this group of creatures is not something I’ve ever written about before. They are sociopathic biomechanical creatures. Or, as I like to put it…compare it to Dr. Who’s Cybermen, but with free will. Sounds scary, I know. But thinking from the perspective of a machine was super difficult for me. I remember trying to watch/read different movies and books that contained characters who were sociopathic and no matter how much I tried to research, I still couldn’t grasp the concept.
So, what do I do? Just start writing and hope for the best. The start of the book was insanely slow and brutal. In my mind, I knew what this main character was supposed to act like, but I just couldn’t automatically figure him out. But, I kept writing though. It wasn’t until chapter four that the book changed on me a bit. I had this particular chapter figured out, or so I thought. I was super excited about it too, but the more I looked at my original outline, the more I noticed that it wasn’t working.
I fought so hard against changing my original plan, but the magic of storytelling was much stronger than my stubbornness. That’s what I had to learn this month, once I caved in to what the character wanted me to write, it went smoother. I’m sure I’ve mentioned this before in some of the blog posts, but I feel that it’s often overlooked when writers talk about their writing process. For the majority of us, we don’t just pop out 50,000 words in a day. If we do, then generally it’s because we’ve thought about it for a VERY long time. As a writer, I think it’s important to remember, and I often forget, that it’s not my stories that I’m writing…it’s the characters. And if the story isn’t going the way it’s supposed to, well they’ll let you know 😉
Unlike the magic from Harry Potter, writing magic doesn’t always come with just a flick of one’s wand. Writing comes with a lot of patience, practice, and listening to one’s inner voice. (Sorry, I couldn’t come up with another “p” word.)
So, how do you know if the magic of writing is REALLY working? When the story starts writing itself.
Let me give you an example from my latest writing project. For the last several months I’ve been working on the third book of my trilogy. Now, to be honest, I dreaded this book because of its level of difficulty. Half of this book is written from the perspective of the villain of the trilogy, which also happens to be the creation of the main villains of my entire universe. Now, this group of creatures is not something I’ve ever written about before. They are sociopathic biomechanical creatures. Or, as I like to put it…compare it to Dr. Who’s Cybermen, but with free will. Sounds scary, I know. But thinking from the perspective of a machine was super difficult for me. I remember trying to watch/read different movies and books that contained characters who were sociopathic and no matter how much I tried to research, I still couldn’t grasp the concept.
So, what do I do? Just start writing and hope for the best. The start of the book was insanely slow and brutal. In my mind, I knew what this main character was supposed to act like, but I just couldn’t automatically figure him out. But, I kept writing though. It wasn’t until chapter four that the book changed on me a bit. I had this particular chapter figured out, or so I thought. I was super excited about it too, but the more I looked at my original outline, the more I noticed that it wasn’t working.
I fought so hard against changing my original plan, but the magic of storytelling was much stronger than my stubbornness. That’s what I had to learn this month, once I caved in to what the character wanted me to write, it went smoother. I’m sure I’ve mentioned this before in some of the blog posts, but I feel that it’s often overlooked when writers talk about their writing process. For the majority of us, we don’t just pop out 50,000 words in a day. If we do, then generally it’s because we’ve thought about it for a VERY long time. As a writer, I think it’s important to remember, and I often forget, that it’s not my stories that I’m writing…it’s the characters. And if the story isn’t going the way it’s supposed to, well they’ll let you know 😉
