Ceara Comeau's Blog: Lessons From A Struggling Writer - Posts Tagged "dreams"
My Fear
I just recently came back from a wonderful vacation at Universal Studios and Islands of Adventure. Now it was definitely fun, but I also learned an important lesson.
This lesson came to me when I got to have the full "Harry Potter" experience where a wand chose me. (If you've read the books or seen the movies, you'll know what I'm talking about.)
The only thing I could think about after all that was, I wanted my future fans to feel that same kind of excitement toward my book as the "Harry Potter" books. But that euphoric feeling I had began to fade away and was soon replaced by fear and doubt.
I'm going to let you in on another secret. My biggest fear isn't one you would normally think. I can handle spiders, snakes are cool, and clowns...well...they aren't so bad. But my real fear is having to take a typical 9-5 job for the rest of my life and just write as a hobby.
This fear, over the last few days, has been at the forefront of my mind. But then I started to re-evaluate my life up to now and how relevant this fear was.
I then began to realize that I may have to take a 9-5 job at some point. But that doesn't mean I can't still try and get my work out to the world--it just might take a bit longer. I mean, look at J.K. Rowling, it took her a while to get recognized. She wasn't a sensation overnight. The fear of failure is very real for an independent author. But I know that if I let that fear control me, then I won't get much farther toward my dreams.
This lesson came to me when I got to have the full "Harry Potter" experience where a wand chose me. (If you've read the books or seen the movies, you'll know what I'm talking about.)
The only thing I could think about after all that was, I wanted my future fans to feel that same kind of excitement toward my book as the "Harry Potter" books. But that euphoric feeling I had began to fade away and was soon replaced by fear and doubt.
I'm going to let you in on another secret. My biggest fear isn't one you would normally think. I can handle spiders, snakes are cool, and clowns...well...they aren't so bad. But my real fear is having to take a typical 9-5 job for the rest of my life and just write as a hobby.
This fear, over the last few days, has been at the forefront of my mind. But then I started to re-evaluate my life up to now and how relevant this fear was.
I then began to realize that I may have to take a 9-5 job at some point. But that doesn't mean I can't still try and get my work out to the world--it just might take a bit longer. I mean, look at J.K. Rowling, it took her a while to get recognized. She wasn't a sensation overnight. The fear of failure is very real for an independent author. But I know that if I let that fear control me, then I won't get much farther toward my dreams.
"Success is not final. Failure is not fatal: It is the courage to continue that counts." -Winston Churchill-
Choose You
Two years ago I made a promise to myself—a promise that I’d do everything I could to make my dreams of being a successful author come true. Whether it be financially, creatively, or even with marketing, I was determined. But, over the last few years, I broke that promise to myself without even realizing it.
See, I had this plan, one that I believed was foolproof. This plan was going to help me get to the top and accomplish all of my dreams. It wasn’t until the beginning of this month that I realized my genius plan became my entire focus. Now, I truly believed that I was still completely focused on my writing and my goals, and honestly, I had fooled myself. I allowed my original plan to dictate when I was going to “feel” creative and whatever the plan deemed most important in my life, I followed without question. Sounds scary, right? I didn’t realize how scary that was until I had a really good conversation with my sister.
I told her about my plan and how I had seen what it was doing to my daily life. She put a gentle hand on my arm and said, “You need to be kinder to yourself.” And for the rest of the month, I constantly thought about what she told me. At first, I argued internally, I thought I was being kind to myself, it was my original plan that was taking hold of my life. But, you see, I was letting it.
There’s something to be said about the power we naturally wield. That power is control, whether that be over ourselves or situations we get ourselves into. We have the power to say yes or no to things that come into our lives. And for me, I didn’t know how to say “no”. Which, is partly why this plan of mine took control. I was too afraid to say that word because I was too afraid that my plan would fall apart and I’d have to conjure up a new way to make my dreams come true. But that little two-letter word is the most important weapon in our arsenal. Because that reconfirms in our minds that we always have control.
So, as we ring in the new year, I want to challenge you to choose you. Focus on self-care. I’m not talking about going to the spa, binge-watching your favorite movie, or reading a book. I’m talking about focusing on your goals and dreams because that is a form of self-care. Make sure you don’t fall into the same trap that I did and make sure that whatever “plan” you may have stays only a plan.
See, I had this plan, one that I believed was foolproof. This plan was going to help me get to the top and accomplish all of my dreams. It wasn’t until the beginning of this month that I realized my genius plan became my entire focus. Now, I truly believed that I was still completely focused on my writing and my goals, and honestly, I had fooled myself. I allowed my original plan to dictate when I was going to “feel” creative and whatever the plan deemed most important in my life, I followed without question. Sounds scary, right? I didn’t realize how scary that was until I had a really good conversation with my sister.
I told her about my plan and how I had seen what it was doing to my daily life. She put a gentle hand on my arm and said, “You need to be kinder to yourself.” And for the rest of the month, I constantly thought about what she told me. At first, I argued internally, I thought I was being kind to myself, it was my original plan that was taking hold of my life. But, you see, I was letting it.
There’s something to be said about the power we naturally wield. That power is control, whether that be over ourselves or situations we get ourselves into. We have the power to say yes or no to things that come into our lives. And for me, I didn’t know how to say “no”. Which, is partly why this plan of mine took control. I was too afraid to say that word because I was too afraid that my plan would fall apart and I’d have to conjure up a new way to make my dreams come true. But that little two-letter word is the most important weapon in our arsenal. Because that reconfirms in our minds that we always have control.
So, as we ring in the new year, I want to challenge you to choose you. Focus on self-care. I’m not talking about going to the spa, binge-watching your favorite movie, or reading a book. I’m talking about focusing on your goals and dreams because that is a form of self-care. Make sure you don’t fall into the same trap that I did and make sure that whatever “plan” you may have stays only a plan.
Childhood Dreams
Imagine this…
It’s summer of 2006 and you’re driving down a lonely road in the rural town of Acworth, NH. About ten miles back you convinced yourself you were on the right track to your destination. But now, the road has become narrow, a river is to your right, and thick woods to your left. There seems to be no one around for miles to ask for directions. You slow your car down as it bounces over some unexpected potholes. You’re about to find the next available U-turn when you look off to the side and see this grand, beautiful yard. But that’s not what catches your attention. It’s the thirteen-year-old girl who appears to be dancing to the beat of her own drum, literally. You think it's nice that she’s getting fresh air and has no care in the world, but you continue to drive on by, seeking your destination.
That little girl barely noticed you, she didn’t have a care in the world because she was not in this world. She had her headphones in her ears listening to a song that resonated with a story she was writing. And, she wasn’t dancing—she was acting. She was imagining how her characters would respond to a scene while at the same time imagining the actors who’d play the roles in the future live-action movie. This girl had so many dreams—this girl was me!
If you had told me all those years ago that I’d be filming my pilot episode in that very same backyard, I’d have been so confused and probably doubtful, “Who’d care about my Amber Oak stories?” I might have said. If you’ve followed my blogs, you probably have noticed that my writing journey has been a long and bumpy one, and one that will never be over as I am always writing still in some way or another.
The truth is, filming had been something I always wanted to do. In fact, when my mom found out how to self-publish my work when I was 15, I was honestly indifferent. Publishing didn’t matter to me so much as imagining the people who’d become the characters in my head. I found so much joy in my friends helping me act out scenes.
As I get ready to start filming this coming weekend, I reflect back even on the journey of getting into film. It was bumpy as well and I’ve faced so many challenges already. But the support from my friends, family, and even cast has been so encouraging. Even though I’ve been planning this for months, it feels so surreal to me. The characters aren’t imaginary anymore, they’re real.
Ever since I finished the last “Amber Oak” book, something had been nagging at me, I’d work on other stories and it’d be fun for a while, but I still kept thinking back on Amber and what she’d be doing right now. I’d ask myself the “what if's” and two summers ago I could almost hear her say to me, “My story isn’t done yet, it’s just beginning!”
I’ve met a LOT of people on this long journey to making Amber become real. And every single one of them helped me in their own way. So, to those who gave me my “wings” and to those who taught me how to use them…Thank you!
It’s summer of 2006 and you’re driving down a lonely road in the rural town of Acworth, NH. About ten miles back you convinced yourself you were on the right track to your destination. But now, the road has become narrow, a river is to your right, and thick woods to your left. There seems to be no one around for miles to ask for directions. You slow your car down as it bounces over some unexpected potholes. You’re about to find the next available U-turn when you look off to the side and see this grand, beautiful yard. But that’s not what catches your attention. It’s the thirteen-year-old girl who appears to be dancing to the beat of her own drum, literally. You think it's nice that she’s getting fresh air and has no care in the world, but you continue to drive on by, seeking your destination.
That little girl barely noticed you, she didn’t have a care in the world because she was not in this world. She had her headphones in her ears listening to a song that resonated with a story she was writing. And, she wasn’t dancing—she was acting. She was imagining how her characters would respond to a scene while at the same time imagining the actors who’d play the roles in the future live-action movie. This girl had so many dreams—this girl was me!
If you had told me all those years ago that I’d be filming my pilot episode in that very same backyard, I’d have been so confused and probably doubtful, “Who’d care about my Amber Oak stories?” I might have said. If you’ve followed my blogs, you probably have noticed that my writing journey has been a long and bumpy one, and one that will never be over as I am always writing still in some way or another.
The truth is, filming had been something I always wanted to do. In fact, when my mom found out how to self-publish my work when I was 15, I was honestly indifferent. Publishing didn’t matter to me so much as imagining the people who’d become the characters in my head. I found so much joy in my friends helping me act out scenes.
As I get ready to start filming this coming weekend, I reflect back even on the journey of getting into film. It was bumpy as well and I’ve faced so many challenges already. But the support from my friends, family, and even cast has been so encouraging. Even though I’ve been planning this for months, it feels so surreal to me. The characters aren’t imaginary anymore, they’re real.
Ever since I finished the last “Amber Oak” book, something had been nagging at me, I’d work on other stories and it’d be fun for a while, but I still kept thinking back on Amber and what she’d be doing right now. I’d ask myself the “what if's” and two summers ago I could almost hear her say to me, “My story isn’t done yet, it’s just beginning!”
I’ve met a LOT of people on this long journey to making Amber become real. And every single one of them helped me in their own way. So, to those who gave me my “wings” and to those who taught me how to use them…Thank you!
Childhood Dreams
Imagine this…
It’s summer of 2006 and you’re driving down a lonely road in the rural town of Acworth, NH. About ten miles back you convinced yourself you were on the right track to your destination. But now, the road has become narrow, a river is to your right, and thick woods to your left. There seems to be no one around for miles to ask for directions. You slow your car down as it bounces over some unexpected potholes. You’re about to find the next available U-turn when you look off to the side and see this grand, beautiful yard. But that’s not what catches your attention. It’s the thirteen-year-old girl who appears to be dancing to the beat of her own drum, literally. You think it's nice that she’s getting fresh air and has no care in the world, but you continue to drive on by, seeking your destination.
That little girl barely noticed you, she didn’t have a care in the world because she was not in this world. She had her headphones in her ears listening to a song that resonated with a story she was writing. And, she wasn’t dancing—she was acting. She was imagining how her characters would respond to a scene while at the same time imagining the actors who’d play the roles in the future live-action movie. This girl had so many dreams—this girl was me!
If you had told me all those years ago that I’d be filming my pilot episode in that very same backyard, I’d have been so confused and probably doubtful, “Who’d care about my Amber Oak stories?” I might have said. If you’ve followed my blogs, you probably have noticed that my writing journey has been a long and bumpy one, and one that will never be over as I am always writing still in some way or another.
The truth is, filming had been something I always wanted to do. In fact, when my mom found out how to self-publish my work when I was 15, I was honestly indifferent. Publishing didn’t matter to me so much as imagining the people who’d become the characters in my head. I found so much joy in my friends helping me act out scenes.
As I get ready to start filming this coming weekend, I reflect back even on the journey of getting into film. It was bumpy as well and I’ve faced so many challenges already. But the support from my friends, family, and even cast has been so encouraging. Even though I’ve been planning this for months, it feels so surreal to me. The characters aren’t imaginary anymore, they’re real.
Ever since I finished the last “Amber Oak” book, something had been nagging at me, I’d work on other stories and it’d be fun for a while, but I still kept thinking back on Amber and what she’d be doing right now. I’d ask myself the “what if's” and two summers ago I could almost hear her say to me, “My story isn’t done yet, it’s just beginning!”
I’ve met a LOT of people on this long journey to making Amber become real. And every single one of them helped me in their own way. So, to those who gave me my “wings” and to those who taught me how to use them…Thank you!
It’s summer of 2006 and you’re driving down a lonely road in the rural town of Acworth, NH. About ten miles back you convinced yourself you were on the right track to your destination. But now, the road has become narrow, a river is to your right, and thick woods to your left. There seems to be no one around for miles to ask for directions. You slow your car down as it bounces over some unexpected potholes. You’re about to find the next available U-turn when you look off to the side and see this grand, beautiful yard. But that’s not what catches your attention. It’s the thirteen-year-old girl who appears to be dancing to the beat of her own drum, literally. You think it's nice that she’s getting fresh air and has no care in the world, but you continue to drive on by, seeking your destination.
That little girl barely noticed you, she didn’t have a care in the world because she was not in this world. She had her headphones in her ears listening to a song that resonated with a story she was writing. And, she wasn’t dancing—she was acting. She was imagining how her characters would respond to a scene while at the same time imagining the actors who’d play the roles in the future live-action movie. This girl had so many dreams—this girl was me!
If you had told me all those years ago that I’d be filming my pilot episode in that very same backyard, I’d have been so confused and probably doubtful, “Who’d care about my Amber Oak stories?” I might have said. If you’ve followed my blogs, you probably have noticed that my writing journey has been a long and bumpy one, and one that will never be over as I am always writing still in some way or another.
The truth is, filming had been something I always wanted to do. In fact, when my mom found out how to self-publish my work when I was 15, I was honestly indifferent. Publishing didn’t matter to me so much as imagining the people who’d become the characters in my head. I found so much joy in my friends helping me act out scenes.
As I get ready to start filming this coming weekend, I reflect back even on the journey of getting into film. It was bumpy as well and I’ve faced so many challenges already. But the support from my friends, family, and even cast has been so encouraging. Even though I’ve been planning this for months, it feels so surreal to me. The characters aren’t imaginary anymore, they’re real.
Ever since I finished the last “Amber Oak” book, something had been nagging at me, I’d work on other stories and it’d be fun for a while, but I still kept thinking back on Amber and what she’d be doing right now. I’d ask myself the “what if's” and two summers ago I could almost hear her say to me, “My story isn’t done yet, it’s just beginning!”
I’ve met a LOT of people on this long journey to making Amber become real. And every single one of them helped me in their own way. So, to those who gave me my “wings” and to those who taught me how to use them…Thank you!
