Preeti Shenoy's Blog, page 70
August 5, 2013
Latest from my end
Amazon India--Indian fiction best-sellers
If you click on Amazon India's best-seller list right now (updated hourly) this is what it looks like. :) . 'Life is what you make it' is on Number 4 and 'The Secret Wish list' is on No.13.(a record of sorts as it is the highest it has climbed so far). Needless to say I am thrilled to bits. (If you haven't read them, go get them now!)
Apart from the above, some nice things have been happening in my life.
The Doon School has invited me for a talk, at their campus. I leave for Dehradun on 7th August.
IIT Kanpur has invited me as speaker at their E-summit 2013, which is happening at their campus. I leave for Kanpur on 18th.
I am going to be speaking on 'The secrets of success' at both these talks.
What makes people successful? What exactly is success? Do you really think hard-work is all that is needed to be successful? Or are other skill-sets necessary? Is success determined by the choices we make? Does destiny play a part? What are the qualities one should cultivate in order to be successful?
These are some of the questions I would be addressing.
In case you wish to explore this topic an excellent book that I recommend is
Malcolm Gladwell's Outliers
However the talk I would be giving would completely be from my own experiences, not Gladwell's :) After all, looking back, I can pin-point with accuracy, all that has worked for me and how my life and views changed, with each step that I climbed.
That's all from me, for now.
I shall try and post snaps of the very picturesque Dehradun.
Till then-- Keep reading great books, guide your mind to happy thoughts and may you have peace and positivity.
Stay blessed.
______________________________________________________________
Buy my books in India, here.
(You can pay cash on delivery. You don't need a credit card)
Buy my books on Amazon, (outside India) here
http://preetishenoy.com/
July 29, 2013
Are you a vicitim of technological assaut? Five ways to fight back.
Often, especially in today's world of 'Instant- communication', we tend to lose an important thing called 'slowing down'. We are impatient and our smart phones and Internet are, I must say, big culprits in this being contributors in this regard.
We expect instant replies when we message someone, especially if there is that option which tells you when the message was seen and read. If they do not get back instantly, there is that slight feeling of 'rejection' that seeps in.
I know of people who obsessively check out 'last seen at..' on whatsapp, when the person fails to get back, within the expected time of response.
Many a time, people are so busy that they not only do not pick up your calls, but even neglect to return missed calls, unless of course it is 'work related'.
People agree to meet and then cancel at the last minute, because 'something urgent and unavoidable' came up at work--never mind that your friend, who had juggled many things to come and see you, was left dangling.
I call all the above 'technology assault'.
If you feel you are a victim of technology assault, here are five things that you can do:
1. Take a 'technology fast' : Go off the phone and Internet for two hours each day. No facebook, no twitter, no blog, heck not even google. You will be amazed how you feel and what you do instead in those two hours. (try it and tell me)
2.. Get out of your office early . (and no, the office will not collapse without you). Go to a beach. Or a Fort. Or a mountain. Anywhere really. Be still for a while and watch the sunset. (Do it)
Most evenings I walk. Today, just as I stepped outside, this was the site that greeted me.
I stood for a full five minutes, gazing at the colours, marveling at the beauty, feeling so blessed to be able to enjoy it.
3. Divert your mind: If you are still obsessing over a set of friends who haven't got back to you and you keep looking at their 'last seen at' then it is time to divert your mind. Go read a book that has you spell bound. ( Read mine!)
4.Find people who have time for you: If you are constantly let down by your 'friends', it is time to widen your circle.Go join a dance class--or a cooking class or a bar-tender's course or a wine-appreciation course---anything really, which you have some interest in. You will meet like-minded folks and even if you don't, you will have a great time.
5.Reward your body by exercise : Go for a walk. Find a park or a walking track in your neighbourhood. Go and walk for 20 minutes. Walk briskly. Do not be lost in your thoughts but observe the people who have come there. Especially the older people. Think about what their life was like, when they were younger. Do they look happy now? Resigned? Content?
Whatever you do, do not be a passive victim of this 'technology assault'.
Fight back! Go LIVE your life--and it does not consist of checking out your friends activities on Facebook! Go get some real fun, real action and have real meetings with real people.
Else before you realise it, your life would have sped you by---while you were checking out tweets and 'last seen at' on your phone.
_________________________________________________________________
Buy my books in India, here.
(You can pay cash on delivery. You don't need a credit card)
Buy my books on Amazon, (outside India) here
http://preetishenoy.com/
July 25, 2013
On how I write what I write.
And so I look at the blog this morning, and realise it has been calling out to me. In fact, it had been calling out to me even last week, but I managed to muffle it's cries with a pillow so that they couldn't be heard. It managed to shake off the pillow now, and has emerged like a zombie, from the dead, speaking in that gravelly whisper saying "UPDATE.....UPDATE...It has been thirteen whole days you know..THIRTEEN". (Gasp!)
And as though that scary visual was not enough to push me into updating this space, kind readers have been writing in asking "When Preeti--when do I get to read something new written by you?"
Awww---how lovely to be loved this much! How can I not oblige with a new post now? :)
So here I am.
Today I thought I would blog about something that I get asked all the time. I get people asking me how I think of stuff that happens in my books, and whether I know exactly what is going to happen and whether I have a certain story in mind, and what is my method of working, and whether I directly work on the laptop, or if I use a pen and paper. (I use pen and paper only to outline, and then use only the laptop.)
I know a lot of writers make up stuff as they go along. For me, my writing is always planned. I will know exactly what is going to happen in a particular chapter. I write down a detailed outline. Then, as I start the chapter, the story takes a life of its own. The characters come alive. After that, they do not listen to me anymore. It is amazing when that happens. I can actually see the scene unfolding before my very eyes, and all I have to do is quickly capture it, which I try to do as my hands fly on the keyboard.
I have no idea where it all comes from. When I write a story, it just flows. Lines like the following get woven in.
People tell me they can relate.
People tell me I have given a voice to what they feel.
For that gift I am always grateful.
__________________________________________________________________
To Buy my books in India, click here. (You can pay cash on delivery. You don't need a credit card)
To buy my books on Amazon, outside India click here
http://preetishenoy.com/
And as though that scary visual was not enough to push me into updating this space, kind readers have been writing in asking "When Preeti--when do I get to read something new written by you?"
Awww---how lovely to be loved this much! How can I not oblige with a new post now? :)
So here I am.
Today I thought I would blog about something that I get asked all the time. I get people asking me how I think of stuff that happens in my books, and whether I know exactly what is going to happen and whether I have a certain story in mind, and what is my method of working, and whether I directly work on the laptop, or if I use a pen and paper. (I use pen and paper only to outline, and then use only the laptop.)
I know a lot of writers make up stuff as they go along. For me, my writing is always planned. I will know exactly what is going to happen in a particular chapter. I write down a detailed outline. Then, as I start the chapter, the story takes a life of its own. The characters come alive. After that, they do not listen to me anymore. It is amazing when that happens. I can actually see the scene unfolding before my very eyes, and all I have to do is quickly capture it, which I try to do as my hands fly on the keyboard.
I have no idea where it all comes from. When I write a story, it just flows. Lines like the following get woven in.
People tell me they can relate.
People tell me I have given a voice to what they feel.
For that gift I am always grateful.
__________________________________________________________________
To Buy my books in India, click here. (You can pay cash on delivery. You don't need a credit card)
To buy my books on Amazon, outside India click here
http://preetishenoy.com/
July 11, 2013
last post of blog marathon 2013! (post 30)
So finally--here is the day! I touch the finish line today :)
I started this 30 days back--and there has been a post every single day. Hooray :)
For today's post I thought I would write about 'labels' that define us--labels we use--labels others use.
In the corporate culture, we find that people are defined by their designations..VP..CEO, Director. In the armed forces, we have ranks-- Lt.colonel, Major etc.
If you aren't in the corporate world, you would probably define yourself by what you do..Graphic designer, Wedding photographer, Librarian etc.
How important are these labels to you? Is your identity defined by these labels? How do you define yourself? Does others perception of you, change who you really are? If not, why does it affect you? What if someone gave you a label, which you are not happy about? Would you correct them? Would you speak up and say 'hey..This is not how I would like to be known as.. I would like to be known as __________'
I leave you to think.
And do share with me the answers to the above, if you feel like it.
I am listening :)
___________________________________________________________________
To Buy my books in India, click here. (You can pay cash on delivery. You don't need a credit card)
To buy my books on Amazon, outside India click here
http://preetishenoy.com/
I started this 30 days back--and there has been a post every single day. Hooray :)
For today's post I thought I would write about 'labels' that define us--labels we use--labels others use.
In the corporate culture, we find that people are defined by their designations..VP..CEO, Director. In the armed forces, we have ranks-- Lt.colonel, Major etc.
If you aren't in the corporate world, you would probably define yourself by what you do..Graphic designer, Wedding photographer, Librarian etc.
How important are these labels to you? Is your identity defined by these labels? How do you define yourself? Does others perception of you, change who you really are? If not, why does it affect you? What if someone gave you a label, which you are not happy about? Would you correct them? Would you speak up and say 'hey..This is not how I would like to be known as.. I would like to be known as __________'
I leave you to think.
And do share with me the answers to the above, if you feel like it.
I am listening :)
___________________________________________________________________
To Buy my books in India, click here. (You can pay cash on delivery. You don't need a credit card)
To buy my books on Amazon, outside India click here
http://preetishenoy.com/
July 10, 2013
5 major deal breakers in friendships (post 29)
Much has been said about the warmth of friendship and the comfort a good one brings. Friends are the family we choose for ourselves.
However, friendships do break, despite your best intentions to be 'forever friends'.
If you are anything like me, I am guessing you would take your friendships seriously. I do and am fortunate to be blessed with some fantastic friends. But, I have of course, had my share of friendships breaking--sometimes because of bad choices I made or sometimes, because some things are a complete NO-NO for me, when it comes to friendships. They are the deal-breakers.
[image error]
Here are my list of deal-breakers (in the order of importance for me)
1.Fair weather friend: If a friend speaks to you, only for 'good times' and isn't there for you, when you are down, and need a shoulder to cry on, then he/she is obviously a fair-weather friend. Dump them, You deserve better.
2.Put-you down friend: Then there is that friend, who plays down all your successes/ achievements. When you share something wonderful that happened to you, they say stuff like 'Oh that's nothing..There is this person I know who.....' and they go on to dazzle you with the brilliance of what this person did. If this happens more than five times with a 'friend' then it is time to move on.
3.I-will-keep-in-touch-only-when-i-have-something-to-say friend : There are some people who remain super-busy and unreachable all the time, that you want to speak to them. Then out of the blue, when they have something to tell you, they call you up to rant/share. You listen to them patiently and then when you want to speak to them about something in your life, they become unreachable and busy again. Not worth holding on to such a friend.
4. The selfish friend : This is a combination of 1, 2 and 3. Awful! Dump!
5.I will-not-share-my-stuff-but-you-share-yours-and-I-will-listen friend: There is this breed of 'friends' who are 'information gatherers'.This especially happens if the friendship is 'professional turned personal'. They want your friendship, as they want to know what is going on in your lives, as it may affect them professionally. This kind of friend is very good at eliciting information out of you. You don't even realise you have told them a lot of stuff. Then, when you ask them about their life, they clamp up and change the topic. They keep their cards completely closed, while you have opened all yours and made yourself vulnerable. Personally I detest people who make me feel vulnerable and powerless. I would run the other way from such a friend.
A friend is supposed to make you feel good. A friend is non-judgmental, supportive of the choices you make. A friend values you, values your time and values the relationship you share. A friend may admonish you, but it would be free of malice, and trust me, you would know the difference between someone who genuinely cares and someone who is just saying stuff in 'guise of a friend' to bring you down.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that life would be simpler and easier, if you get rid of these 'friends' who aren't helping you grow, who are there only to take from you and give nothing in return.
The mobile company sure got it wrong when they said 'har ek friend zaroori hota hai'.
What are the friendship deal-breakers for you?
If you care to share, I am listening. I would love to know.
______________________________________________________________________________
To Buy my books in India, click here. (You can pay cash on delivery. You don't need a credit card)
To buy my books on Amazon, outside India click here
http://preetishenoy.com/
However, friendships do break, despite your best intentions to be 'forever friends'.
If you are anything like me, I am guessing you would take your friendships seriously. I do and am fortunate to be blessed with some fantastic friends. But, I have of course, had my share of friendships breaking--sometimes because of bad choices I made or sometimes, because some things are a complete NO-NO for me, when it comes to friendships. They are the deal-breakers.
[image error]
Here are my list of deal-breakers (in the order of importance for me)
1.Fair weather friend: If a friend speaks to you, only for 'good times' and isn't there for you, when you are down, and need a shoulder to cry on, then he/she is obviously a fair-weather friend. Dump them, You deserve better.
If your *friend* isn't there for you when you really need them and mysteriously reappear when things are fine, time to walk away.
— Preeti Shenoy (@preetishenoy) July 10, 2013
2.Put-you down friend: Then there is that friend, who plays down all your successes/ achievements. When you share something wonderful that happened to you, they say stuff like 'Oh that's nothing..There is this person I know who.....' and they go on to dazzle you with the brilliance of what this person did. If this happens more than five times with a 'friend' then it is time to move on.
3.I-will-keep-in-touch-only-when-i-have-something-to-say friend : There are some people who remain super-busy and unreachable all the time, that you want to speak to them. Then out of the blue, when they have something to tell you, they call you up to rant/share. You listen to them patiently and then when you want to speak to them about something in your life, they become unreachable and busy again. Not worth holding on to such a friend.
4. The selfish friend : This is a combination of 1, 2 and 3. Awful! Dump!
5.I will-not-share-my-stuff-but-you-share-yours-and-I-will-listen friend: There is this breed of 'friends' who are 'information gatherers'.This especially happens if the friendship is 'professional turned personal'. They want your friendship, as they want to know what is going on in your lives, as it may affect them professionally. This kind of friend is very good at eliciting information out of you. You don't even realise you have told them a lot of stuff. Then, when you ask them about their life, they clamp up and change the topic. They keep their cards completely closed, while you have opened all yours and made yourself vulnerable. Personally I detest people who make me feel vulnerable and powerless. I would run the other way from such a friend.
A friend is supposed to make you feel good. A friend is non-judgmental, supportive of the choices you make. A friend values you, values your time and values the relationship you share. A friend may admonish you, but it would be free of malice, and trust me, you would know the difference between someone who genuinely cares and someone who is just saying stuff in 'guise of a friend' to bring you down.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that life would be simpler and easier, if you get rid of these 'friends' who aren't helping you grow, who are there only to take from you and give nothing in return.
The mobile company sure got it wrong when they said 'har ek friend zaroori hota hai'.
What are the friendship deal-breakers for you?
If you care to share, I am listening. I would love to know.
______________________________________________________________________________
To Buy my books in India, click here. (You can pay cash on delivery. You don't need a credit card)
To buy my books on Amazon, outside India click here
http://preetishenoy.com/
July 9, 2013
Tweet tweet (Post 28)
Since many of you who read me here are not on twitter, I thought I would compile a list of all the interesting stuff that i tweeted over the last few days, for today's post.
Here are the tweets that I sent out or retweeted which struck a chord in me.
Here are the tweets that I sent out or retweeted which struck a chord in me.
If you do not talk about something you are proud of and have worked hard for, chances are others will not too.
— Preeti Shenoy (@preetishenoy) July 9, 2013
If she texts you, text her back. Just because she’s yours at the moment, doesn’t mean she still will be in the future. Treat her right.
July 8, 2013
All in a day's work. post 27
Most of you must now be aware that Amazon has started in India. I don't remember if I mentioned that on the day that it opened in India, my book (Life is what you make it) was on Number one spot.
Today I checked the Amazon Indian writing best seller list. The best-seller lists are updated every hour on Amazon, based on actual purchases and it is an automated list.Out of the thousands of books published, it lists the top 100 best-selling books in the country.
Guess what i discovered?
ALL the books I have written so far, are in this list of top 100!
Boy, was I overjoyed!
Here is the order of appearance:
Life is what you make it (Number 4 on the list)
The Secret Wish list (No.28)
34 bubblegums and candies (No.39)
Tea for two and a piece of cake (no.93)
I also got two totally contrasting perspectives today. One reader wrote to tell me that she hated 'life is what you make it'. It left her depressed and she was unable to complete the book. Another wrote to me telling me that he was on the verge of suicide and the book saved his life because it gave him hope.
One reader wrote saying that 34 bubblegums and candies is a book for 10 year olds and was an utter waste of money and another reader wrote saying that 34 bubblegums and candies was the most refreshing book she has ever read, it cheered her up, made her feel life was worth living after all and left a sweet after-taste in her mouth.
Yet another reader (someone who has done her Ph.d) had this to say about 'The secret wish list'
For me, what really counts is whether my writings manage to make an emotional connect with the reader. If the reader could feel everything that the protagonist underwent, I would consider it a great compliment. It is an honour to get your mails and even though I get hundreds, the joy is still the same.
I take a while to reply (about 20-30 days on an average) as I have a huge back-log of mails. As much as I would like to reply promptly, it just cannot be done, as then I would have to make an alternate career as a e-mail writer , instead of writing books.
If you want to interact with me, and are in a hurry to get my response, the fastest way would be twitter (@preetishenoy is my twitter handle). The next best way to get a quick reply is Facebook wall of my author page.
The third best way would be an e-mail. (Mail me on ps(at)preetishenoy(dot)com. The worst way to try and reach me is by phone! I never pick up unknown numbers and I also talk on the phone only to my mom :) (Because I need huge chunks of time to write undisturbed, and I find telephones a huge intrusion when I am writing)
I got a threat also today. Someone tweeted to me saying I do not reply to his tweets at all, and unless I replied immediately he would 'black-list' me and I would lose a fan :)
Can you guess whether I replied or not? :)
Leave me your guess in the comment box, and I shall update this post tomorrow with my answer.
Sigh--all in a day's work.
___________________________________________________________________________
To Buy my books in India, click here. (You can pay cash on delivery. You don't need a credit card)
To buy my books on Amazon, outside India click here
http://preetishenoy.com/
Today I checked the Amazon Indian writing best seller list. The best-seller lists are updated every hour on Amazon, based on actual purchases and it is an automated list.Out of the thousands of books published, it lists the top 100 best-selling books in the country.
Guess what i discovered?
ALL the books I have written so far, are in this list of top 100!
Boy, was I overjoyed!
Here is the order of appearance:
Life is what you make it (Number 4 on the list)
The Secret Wish list (No.28)
34 bubblegums and candies (No.39)
Tea for two and a piece of cake (no.93)
I also got two totally contrasting perspectives today. One reader wrote to tell me that she hated 'life is what you make it'. It left her depressed and she was unable to complete the book. Another wrote to me telling me that he was on the verge of suicide and the book saved his life because it gave him hope.
One reader wrote saying that 34 bubblegums and candies is a book for 10 year olds and was an utter waste of money and another reader wrote saying that 34 bubblegums and candies was the most refreshing book she has ever read, it cheered her up, made her feel life was worth living after all and left a sweet after-taste in her mouth.
Yet another reader (someone who has done her Ph.d) had this to say about 'The secret wish list'
"I must congratulate you once again, for your work portrays positive images of women despite the hardships, conflicts that they go through. Your portrayal of adolescence and young adulthood as a life stage is admirable. How a simple folly committed in youth changes the person's life entirely is something you have dealt in depth. You have somehow also sent a message to parents discreetly about the repercussions of their actions which can have a deep impact on the individual's psyche. Sorry, I can go on and on about your book, but you must be hard pressed for time."
For me, what really counts is whether my writings manage to make an emotional connect with the reader. If the reader could feel everything that the protagonist underwent, I would consider it a great compliment. It is an honour to get your mails and even though I get hundreds, the joy is still the same.
I take a while to reply (about 20-30 days on an average) as I have a huge back-log of mails. As much as I would like to reply promptly, it just cannot be done, as then I would have to make an alternate career as a e-mail writer , instead of writing books.
If you want to interact with me, and are in a hurry to get my response, the fastest way would be twitter (@preetishenoy is my twitter handle). The next best way to get a quick reply is Facebook wall of my author page.
The third best way would be an e-mail. (Mail me on ps(at)preetishenoy(dot)com. The worst way to try and reach me is by phone! I never pick up unknown numbers and I also talk on the phone only to my mom :) (Because I need huge chunks of time to write undisturbed, and I find telephones a huge intrusion when I am writing)
I got a threat also today. Someone tweeted to me saying I do not reply to his tweets at all, and unless I replied immediately he would 'black-list' me and I would lose a fan :)
Can you guess whether I replied or not? :)
Leave me your guess in the comment box, and I shall update this post tomorrow with my answer.
Sigh--all in a day's work.
___________________________________________________________________________
To Buy my books in India, click here. (You can pay cash on delivery. You don't need a credit card)
To buy my books on Amazon, outside India click here
http://preetishenoy.com/
July 7, 2013
Belly. (sunday scribblings) Post 26
Thought I would do a
Sunday Scribblings
post for today and the prompt at Sunday scribblings is 'Belly'.
The word belly conjures up mainly three images in my mind..
Pot-belly, Belly-laugh and Belly-dancing
Of all of the above, the one I like most is of course a belly-laugh. A deep, rumbling belly laugh that spreads all over your body till you are shaking helplessly in laughter. Sometimes you laugh so much that your belly hurts. I laugh a lot and I laugh often. I feel blessed to be able to do that. I can laugh at any damn thing, including myself. (okay--most of the time) :) People who know me well, sometimes call me up, just because they know I will make them laugh.
And the one I dislike most from all the above is a pot-belly.
And the way most Indians are, I would not be surprised if the pot-belly is a secret turn-on, for most of our people. The closet sex-symbol :) (How else do you explain the burgeoning, ever-growing population in our country? You have a pot-belly? By Ganesha Jove, I find you sexy.. Come to bed :) )
As regards Belly-dancing, I first witnessed it in Egypt and I was mesmerized
If you have never heard of it, or never seen it, do watch this video.
I think it takes tremendous talent to do this.
Now if only I could say honestly what Amanda Seyfried said (famously)
"I have belly-fat like evrybody else, and I don't want to be airbrushed on the cover of a magazine."
And till i can do that, I shall work towards this
_______________________________________________________
If you like my writing, you might enjoy my books.
To Buy my books in India, click here. (You can pay cash on delivery. You don't need a credit card)
To buy my books on Amazon, outside India click here
http://preetishenoy.com/
The word belly conjures up mainly three images in my mind..
Pot-belly, Belly-laugh and Belly-dancing
Of all of the above, the one I like most is of course a belly-laugh. A deep, rumbling belly laugh that spreads all over your body till you are shaking helplessly in laughter. Sometimes you laugh so much that your belly hurts. I laugh a lot and I laugh often. I feel blessed to be able to do that. I can laugh at any damn thing, including myself. (okay--most of the time) :) People who know me well, sometimes call me up, just because they know I will make them laugh.
And the one I dislike most from all the above is a pot-belly.
And the way most Indians are, I would not be surprised if the pot-belly is a secret turn-on, for most of our people. The closet sex-symbol :) (How else do you explain the burgeoning, ever-growing population in our country? You have a pot-belly? By Ganesha Jove, I find you sexy.. Come to bed :) )
As regards Belly-dancing, I first witnessed it in Egypt and I was mesmerized
If you have never heard of it, or never seen it, do watch this video.
I think it takes tremendous talent to do this.
Now if only I could say honestly what Amanda Seyfried said (famously)
"I have belly-fat like evrybody else, and I don't want to be airbrushed on the cover of a magazine."
And till i can do that, I shall work towards this
_______________________________________________________
If you like my writing, you might enjoy my books.
To Buy my books in India, click here. (You can pay cash on delivery. You don't need a credit card)
To buy my books on Amazon, outside India click here
http://preetishenoy.com/
July 6, 2013
Pictures speak louder than words (post 25)
Two pictures, both clicked by my son (who is 15).
I think he has a good eye---even if I may say so myself. Don't you think?
_____________________________________________________________
If you like my writing, you might enjoy my books.
To Buy my books in India, click here. (You can pay cash on delivery. You don't need a credit card)
To buy my books on Amazon, outside India click here
http://preetishenoy.com/
July 5, 2013
The unwanted guests (post 24)
The Guest House
This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice.
meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.
Be grateful for whatever comes.
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.
-- Jelaluddin Rumi,
translation by Coleman Barks
When I first came across the above poem, I was astounded at the depth in these words. For the first time I understood the meaning of the hindi phrase गागर में सागर भर दिया .
I would have never looked at sorrow that way--that it was clearing me out for something better.
Yet, the more I look back and reflect on my life, the more I realise it is true.
While we go through the pain, what we are doing is pushing the limits of endurance. We are raising the bar that much higher, becoming stronger, without our realising it.
Madhuri and I were chatting over whatsapp today, and she and I both agreed that whatever happens in our lives is a part of 'a grand plan'. Of course, there is free-will in your life. That is in your hands. But there is only so much that you can control. You just cannot control everything in your life--no matter how much you plan, no matter how much you take care of things.
The sooner one accepts this, and the sooner one welcomes even the seemingly 'unwanted guests'--- like meanness towards you from someone you never excepted it from, rejection, unkindness, betrayal, jealousy, pettiness---the easier it becomes to let go.
Let go.
It is indeed for the better, though it doesn't seem so right now.
Just do the best that you can under the present situation---and things have a way of working themselves out.
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