Matthew Dicks's Blog, page 708

Wardrobe malfunction

I saw a woman in the gym today with a tee-shirt that read:

A friend will help you move…

Then on the back of the tee-shirt, it read:

But a real friend will help you move a body.

Of course, in order to read the back of her shirt, I had to dismount my elliptical machine, feign the need for a drink of water at the fountain, and pause beside a support column in order to read it.

I'm not quibbling with the message on the shirt, as inane as it may be, but I have a problem with the idea of...

Joy? Of course. But a source of pride? No.

Slate's Dear Prudence received this letter from a reader seeking advice:

Dear Prudie,
My mother-in-law is driving me crazy. My husband and I just found out that we are pregnant with our second child, and I heard she's pregnant, too. I cannot conceive of being pregnant at the same time as my mother-in-law! She has this notion that she is "too young" to be a grandma, and I am so angry with her for trying to take my spotlight. She is 44 years old, and it makes me upset that she wants to have...

Reunited! And perhaps an idea for a book.

This afternoon, I was eating lunch with a colleague who has been teaching for almost forty years.  She was telling us about some of her most memorable students from the past, including a young man named Richard who she had taught back in 1971.  Richard wasn't the most well-behaved student in third grade and she was wondering what ever happened to the boy.

So I looked him up. 

In less than three minutes, I had located Richard and his place of business just by using my iPhone.  Then I...

Ill sleep when Im dead

I've often argued that the amount of sleep a person needs and his or her subsequent alertness is more a state of mind than actual physiology. Of course, this is coming from a guy who just slept four hours last night and is feeling just fine, so my opinion is admittedly biased.

But new research seems to be at least leaning in my general direction.

A study from the University of Vermont and appearing in Psychopharmacology this year has found that the effects of caffeine on a person's...

Verbal Sparring 101

A friend of mine recently began reading my manuscript, which features a protagonist who is a vigilante of sorts, a man seeking to fight against the forces of petty annoyance and incivility from time to time.  She asked me where I had gotten the idea of writing about vigilantism, and I told her that the idea popped into my head, as most do when writing.  I had no idea that my protagonist was a vigilante until I started putting words to the page.  I've never known any vigilantes in my time...

My own Android app, plus SOMETHING MISSING on the iPhone

In the latest digital news related to SOMETHING MISSING and my writing in general, there are now applications available to iPhone and Android users who might be interested:

First, and most exciting, my wife and I designed an Android app that compiles all of my online content into one, easy –to-access location.  My blogs, my Twitter feed, my Flickr feed and more can all be accessed through this app, entitled Matthew Dicks.  

Easy to remember.

I don't have an Android phone, so I've only...

Another bestseller list!

Still not the New York Times bestseller list, but SOMETHING MISSING was number 4 on last week's bestseller list for Market Block Books in Troy, NY, alongside such heavyweights as THE ELEGRANCE OF THE HEDGEHOG THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO. 

Very good company.  

Earlier in the month, I made the best seller list at a Seattle book shop, which makes it two bestseller lists in the month of February. 

Isn't that at least as good as one week on the Times bestseller list?

Genius name recognition

I spent much of the morning at the Apple Store with a very competent employee at The Genius Bar attempted to diagnose the problem with my iPhone.

I've spent a great deal of time at The Genius Bar with a variety of iPhone issues over the years and have come to one conclusion:

Whenever possible, find the least competent "genius" to assist you.  Competent employees are willing to spend hours working on your phone, diagnosing problems and attempting various solutions.  Less competent...

Third person nightmare

I've started to refer to myself as Daddy in the third person.  Even when my daughter is not around. 

Me:  Daddy's going to bring to garbage out.

Mother-in-law:  Isn't Clara upstairs already?

Me:  Um…yes. 

Mother-in-law:  Then who are you talking to?

Me:  Kill me now.  Please.

I've actually given my wife permission to administer electro-shock therapy if necessary.  Anything it takes to prevent me from speaking like this ever again. 

If you catch me doing this, I give you permission...

My book has been hijacked by a couple of no-nothings.

I have been betrayed by my book. 

As I come closer and closer to completing the manuscript to CHIKCEN SHACK, the story continues to veer off in unintended directions.  When I began writing  a year ago, I thought I'd be telling the story of two rival brothers and how their familial relationship did not preclude them from being ruthless and cruel to one another.  I wanted to demonstrate how friends can sometimes be more loyal and loving than family and that genetic similarity is not always a...