Matthew Dicks's Blog, page 698

This should not be that hard

If you're not going with the traditional Men and Women signifiers, you've got to get it right.

Mother and Dad?

Not Mother and Father?  Or Mom and Dad?

I'm thinking of launching a website that solicits photos of the signifiers that are restaurants use on their restroom doors.  The stupid ones, I mean.

Thoughts?

Dignity

I was recently discussing living wills with a friend, and the decisions related to long-term care arose.  Specifically, we were discussing our wishes in the event that we are someday hooked up to a ventilator or receiving nourishment through a feeding tube, unable to take care of ourselves anymore. 

You know… when and if I become old, decrepit, and senile.

If this were to even happen, I told my friend that I would want every ounce of effort put into dragging out the process of death for...

Resolution Update: April

In an effort to achieve my yearly goals, I post my monthly progress here.

Below are my sixteen New Year's resolutions and my progress thus far.

1.  Lose seventeen more pounds, bringing my weight down to 185 pounds, which was my high school pole vaulting weight.

I lost one pound this month, and one pound all year after the February debacle.  Sixteen pounds to go.

2.  Complete CHICKEN SHACK by April 15 (adjusted from an original target of my birthday).

Finished writing the book on April...

I love it when my pithy observation is actually real

A reader of this blog had some valuable insight in relation to my last post on skin care. 

It turns out that I was right.  Men's skin is superior to women's skin! 

Check it out:

A man's skin is about 20% thicker than a woman's and is usually firmer because it is richer in collagen and elastin levels. This is why many men tend to age without as many deep-set wrinkles and fine lines as women.

Unlike female skin, male skin also has larger pores, a richer blood supply, and more active...

Skin care gone awry

One of the greatest sources of amusement for me is the amount of product, money and time that women spend on skin care.  In an effort to have clear skin, I know women who spend hundreds of dollars a year on skin care products, yet I do not have a single male friend with a noticeable skin problem, and I have yet to find one who is using any product save soap and water in order to keep his skin looking good.

Someone please explain.

I dont have a relationship with my electric toothbrush, but I still use it daily

I recently heard Alice Waters, well known restaurateur, explain to Bill Maher that she does not use a microwave because "I don't have a relationship with that machine."

And Maher let that ridiculous, nonsensical statement go unchallenged.

When experts begin to speak in drivel and mumbo-jumbo, ordinary folk need to call them on it.  Bill Maher missed an opportunity and an obligation to tell Waters how stupid she sounded.  

Who am I?

I have been invited to join the International Association of Crime Writers. I received the invitation via an email from the North American branch today. 

One problem: I'm not a crime writer.

Yes, my first book contains certain elements tied to crime writing, but my second book, UNEXPECTEDLY, MILO, has nothing to do with crime.  Nor does my third.

It's been interesting to see how readers, booksellers and other attempt to define me as a writer.  I guess with just one book in print thus...

Trash

I was getting my haircut last week. and the usually bustling salon was relatively empty. Just me, the woman cutting my hair (not my regular stylist) and a customer on the other side of the salon, sitting with tinfoil in her hair.

Halfway through the haircut, the tinfoil lady, People magazine in hand, asked my stylist, "Does Angelina Jolie have a reason to be angry with Jennifer Aniston?" So began a five minute discussion about these two actresses. Their careers. Their children. Their love...

If the word common is in the name

If it's so common (and it is) why is it in a zoo? 

I had just as much chance as seeing one of these birds in the tree beside the caged one.

Dueling with my literary agent

This morning I wrote the last words of CHICKEN SHACK, finishing the book in almost exactly one year.  After getting up to pee and grab a cookie, I sat back down and began the revision process. 

My agent, Taryn, has read the first half of the book and sent me notes to consider during revision.  My books tend to need a lot more revision in the first half of the novel because I tend to wander a bit and fumble around for a plot.  Once I find the story and kick it into the action, there tends...