Keith McArthur's Blog, page 8
June 25, 2018
Summer Podcast Schedule
Just a quick note this week to let you know that the My Instruction Manual podcast will be publishing every two weeks over the summer.
I’ll be back with a full episode next week.
You can listen to this week’s audio note about the summer schedule here:
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Why Bi-Weekly?
Here’s why I’m temporarily cutting back from weekly episodes.
I am now deep into writing my next book, which is all about Resolutions: How to set them, how to plan for them and how to keep them. As part of the book research, I’ve set some resolutions for myself. And one is to get my first draft of the book done by August 3.
In order to do this, and still spend some quality time with my kids while they’re off over the summer, I’ve decided I need to temporarily cut back on the time I spend each week on the podcast.
At first I thought I would take the summer off from podcasting completely and call this the end of season 1. Then I thought about doing what some podcasters do, and replay their most popular episodes during a summer hiatus.
But I decided the best way to give myself the time I need and still be able to connect with you on a regular basis is to put out a new episode every two weeks.
The plan is to return to weekly episodes after Labor Day. Tune in next Monday, July 2 for a full episode.
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June 21, 2018
Resolutions Update: Weight Loss
When I stepped off the scale and logged my weight into MyFitnessPal yesterday morning, I got a nice surprise. In a popup message surrounded by confetti, the app let me know that I’ve lost 35 pounds since my high weight of 241.4 pounds 20 months ago.
It was a great feeling that only got better when I showed the alert to my 14-year-old son.
“Great job man!” Connor said. “I’m so proud of you.”
Resolutions Book
My next book, scheduled for release this fall, is all about resolutions: How to set them, how to plan them, and how to keep them. As part of the research process, I’ve set three goals for myself: To lose weight, to stick to my writing schedule, and to built the habit of applying sunblock every day.
You can read more about my book and resolutions here.
[image error]A nice surprise from MyFitnessPal
Most of the 35 pounds were lost before I set this resolution, but I was starting to put the pounds back on early this Spring.
My weight loss resolution is to get my weight under 205 pounds by Aug. 3, down from a weight of over 216 on May 18. When I weighed myself this morning, I clocked in at 206.2 pounds. With just a pound to go, I’m feeling pretty good about hitting my goal!
My first inclination was to increase my target, and maybe try to lose an additional 5 pounds by Aug. 3. But as I’ll explain in the book, the better strategy is to mark the goal complete and celebrate it.
Then, if I want to lose more weight, I can take the time to properly set and plan another weight loss resolution.
My Weight Loss Strategies
Here are some of the things I’ve done to achieve my goal:
Focus on food. I’ve done a pretty good job of getting exercise since my transplant, party through running and going to the gym, but mostly just from walking a lot. Despite this, my weight was still going up early this spring. I knew that if I was going to be successful, I had to focus on the calories going in.
Be healthy. Remember Garfield – the orange comic strip cat who loves lasagna but hates Mondays? When I was a kid, I had a poster in my room in which Garfield was lying flat on the floor with his teeth clenched around his red food bowl. Garfield wore a pained, exhausted expression and held a lettuce leaf in his left hand. The caption read: “Diet is ‘die’ with a ‘t.’” The notion that diets must be painful is pervasive, but I don’t buy it for one minute. Sorry Garfield.
If I was going to be successful, I had to make sure I didn’t get hungry. So I settled on a few simple guidelines. I would eat smaller portions and stop eating before I felt full. Where possible, I would make healthier choices, like ordering salmon and veggies at a restaurant instead of steak frities. I would generally avoid eating eating deserts and salty snacks, but doing so once in a while was okay, as long as I was conscious about choosing those foods. My basic rule was this: It’s okay to eat what you want, as long as you’re sure you want what you eat.
Focus on 500. As a general benchmark, 3,500 calories equals one pound. If you run a marathon, you’ll burn somewhere around 3,500 calories and lose one pound. My focus was on losing one pound per week, mostly through diet, so I set myself a daily goal of consuming 500 fewer calories than I burned.
Measure inputs. For the first two weeks, I kept meticulous track of every calorie I consumed and burned. The Fitbit my wife got me for my birthday was helpful with this. The good news was that I was burning more calories each day than I expected: somewhere around 3,500. According to my Fitbit, I burn 2,000 calories a day just by living, without doing any exercise. While I do cardio or weights two or three times a week, most of the rest of the calories actually come from walking. I work from home, and having an energetic puppy who needs walking certainly helps with my 10,000 steps.
Tracking the calories going in taught me even more about how many calories were in different kind of foods. It also helped me to be more mindful about my choices. Instead of grabbing the bag of almonds when I got hungry in the afternoon, I would leave the bag in the cupboard and eat five (35 calories) at a time. The night I calculated that a dinner out on a weekend away (a personal pizza and a pint of beer) contained 1,800 calories was especially enlightening.
Track results. I wanted to avoid getting overly obsessed with minor fluctuations in my weight so I decided I wouldn’t weigh myself too often. I figured it was more important to believe in the process and stick too it. In fact, I didn’t even weigh myself on the day I set my resolution. All I know is that my last recorded weight was 216 pounds one month prior and I could feel myself getting heavier. My original plan was to only weigh myself three times during the 12-week resolution timeframe. A few weeks into the plan, however, I decided I needed a little more feedback on my progress so I began weighing myself each Monday. (I weighed myself an extra time yesterday ahead of writing this post).
Manage my environment. By keeping the things that tempt me out of the house (mostly chips and ice cream), I’m less likely to eat them. Since I do most of the grocery shopping, this technique is mostly working. I skip the snacks aisle and the ice cream aisle, much to Laura’s displeasure. This technique has been helpful.
The other night when we were watching TV, I wanted to dig into some salty snacks so bad that I turned to Laura and longingly said: “Imagine if we had a bag of chips right now?” I was bummed that we didn’t have any, but it was a good thing. We had been enjoying some sparkling wine and I know that my willpower would have been weak. If there had been Doritos in the house, I would have eaten too many and missed my 500. But we didn’t have chips, so I munched on carrot sticks and humus instead.
What about you? What big goals or resolutions are you trying to achieve for yourself? Scroll down and let me know in the comments!
The post Resolutions Update: Weight Loss appeared first on My Instruction Manual.
June 18, 2018
Summer Reading
In this special episode of the podcast, host Keith McArthur gets summer reading recos from some of the world’s most inspiring people. Guests include Rick Hanson, Sally Helgesen, Morra Aarons-Mele and Greg Wells.
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Keith counts down his past guests’ book recos.
Jenny Blake, from episode 1 [1:45]
Finding Your Own North Star by Martha Beck “a close cousin and inspiration to Pivot”
Seat of the Soul by Gary Zukav “inspired Oprah back in 1987”
Outrageous Openness by Tosha Silver “I love the book”
Loving What Is by Byron Katie “a true game-changer for flipping stressful thoughts around.”
Kurek Ashley, from episode 2 [2:47]
The Science of Getting Rich, Wallace D. Wattles
Robert Puff, from episode 3 [4:12 ]
The Way to Love: The Last Meditations of Anthony de Mello. “It really touches on all the things about what makes life work at a very deep level but in very simple terms.”
Luminita D. Saviuc, from episode 4 [4:55]
Power vs Force by David R. Hawkins. “You will learn so much and it will change you forever.”
Joelenta Greenberg, from episode 5 [6:23]
A blank journal
The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron
Greg Wells, from episode 6 [7:15]
The Way of the Peaceful Warrior by Dan Millman. “That’s one that I’ve gone through pretty repeatedly throughout my life”
The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari by Robin S. Sharma. “Another general mindset book that’s made a big difference in my adult life.”
Fabiana Bacchini, from episode 7 [8:15]
Option B by Sheryl Sandberg. “She lost her husband a few years ago and she shares her journey and a lot of lessons she learned on that journey.”
The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo. “There is something very, truly magical about it.”
Celeste Headlee, from episode 8 [10:49]
Yes Please by Amy Poehler. “She’s basically talking to you about how she created the life that she has now and a lot of it is about empowerment.”
Morra Aarons-Mele, from episode 9 [12:01]
Achieving Success Through Social Capital by Wayne Baker. “It should be the bible of every introvert / hermit who wants to be successful.”
Martin Gibala, from episode 10 [13:49]
Blue Zones of Happiness by Dan Buettner. “They have commonalities that lead to longer happier lives so I just thought that book was excellent.”
HBR’s 10 Must Reads of 2018: The definitive Management Ideas of the Year from Harvard Business Review by Clayton M. Christensen. “These are just short chapters that are quite inspirational and give some very good tips that you can adopt on your own.”
Andrea Owen, from episode 13 [15:10]
Daring Greatly by Brené Brown. “it’s foundational in the work that I’ve done with myself and my clients”
Jeff Chegwin, from episode 14 [15:40]
“I don’t think I’ve ever read one” but Fix You by Coldplay as an inspirational song.
Carmela DiClemente, from episode 14 [15:40]
My Family and other Animals by Gerald Durrell. “It made me worship nature.”
Leslie Caubble, from episode, from episode 15 [17:54]
The One Thing by Gary Keller. “I use it every day, just the whole premise of it.”
Daisy Buchanan, from episode 16 [19:40]
Crazy Salad by Nora Ephron
Kristen Ulmer, from episode 17 [21:49]
The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. “Reading that book really changed my life because I realized I could access that state just sitting in a chair.”
Jake Nawrocki, from episode 18 [22:57]
As a Man Thinketh by James Allen. “It’s an amazing read. I highly suggest it.”
Stever Robbbins, from episode 19 [24:17]
Loving What Is: Four Questions that Can Change Your Life by Byron Katie. “I have found nothing that even approaches this in terms of how powerful it can be.”
Olivia D’Silva, from episode 22 [25:25]
The Four Desires: Creating a Life of Purpose, Happiness, Prosperity, and Freedom
by Rob Stryker. “If anybody is wanting to find direction in life, I totally recommend this book.”Start with Why: How Great Leaders Inspire Everyone to Take Action by Simon Sinek
. “Reading these two books in conjunction really helped me to think about what it is that I want to offer the world.”Rick Hanson, from episode 24 [26:40 ]
Dune by Frank Herbert
Buddha’s Brain by Rick Hanson and Richard Mendius
Sattipatthana by Analayo
Chantal Heide, from episode 25 [30:33]
The Dance of Anger by Harriet Lerner
Stephanie McArthur, from episode 26 [31:25]
Baseball Life Advice by Stacy May Fowles
Sally Helgesen, from episode 27 [33:01]
Falling Upwards by Richard Rohr
Todd Davis, from episode 28 [33:41]
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey
The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell
Linchpin by Seth Godin
Jason Richardson, from episode 29 [36:01]
The Dip: A Little Book That Teaches You When to Quit (and When to Stick) by Seth Godin
Alison Green, from episode 30 [37:55]
Emma by Jane Austin. “I’ve read Jane Austin’s Emma more times than I can count and it just makes me happy.”
Jonathan Rauch, from episode 33 [38:31]
The Happiness Hypothesis by Jonathan Haidt
Allison Task from episode 35 [39:57]
The Kama Sutra. “Having good sex can be fun. And are you connecting to the people closest to you?”
Keith McArthur, from episode 11 [40:56]
10% Happier by Dan Harris. “The book that inspired me to try meditation for the first time.”
Joelle Anderson, from episode 11 [42:03]
Mindfulness in Plain English by Bhante Gunaratana. “It’s a great introduction to mindfulness”
The Alchemist by Paolo Coelho. “Has such amazing philosophies and lessons for life”
Michelle Jaelin, from episode 11 [42:41]
You Are a Badass by Jen Sincero. “I find it’s very positive. I find it’s very encouraging.”
Kathleen Trotter, from episode 11 [43:34]
The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown
Mindset by Carol Dweck
The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin
Better Than Before by Gretchen Rubin
Grit by Andrea Duckworth
Real Happiness by Sharon Salzberg
[44:28] Closing words
Feedback & Connect
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The post Summer Reading appeared first on My Instruction Manual.
June 11, 2018
Grateful for Mornings
There’s nothing like a hot fresh cup of coffee in the morning. Even when I have a hard day ahead, the thought of my first sip of Joe is enough to get me out of bed. It’s just one of the reasons why I’m grateful for mornings.
Today marks 14 months since my little sister gave me a second chance at life when she donated one of her kidneys to me. Each month, I take some time to reflect and give thanks for all that I have in life.
So why am I grateful for mornings? Well, first off, I’m a morning person. I admit, this probably makes loving mornings a little easier for me.
Here are five more reasons I’m grateful for mornings.
I’m grateful to be alive. In the weeks before my kidney transplant, fears about my health were at an all-time high. It probably wasn’t reasonable, but there were nights when I went to bed worried that I might not wake up in the morning. No matter what else goes wrong, every day I wake up is a good day.
I’m grateful for fresh starts. Even if I didn’t live my best life yesterday, that’s okay. It’s in the past. I wake up each morning with a fresh start and the freedom to choose how I want to live today.
I’m grateful for help. Mornings are an especially chaotic time for a special-needs family like ours. My son Bryson needs help with just everything from eating to getting dressed to toileting. Before we had help, Laura and I did this all on our own. As a result, we would often start our work days exhausted. Now, Bryson has a terrific personal support worker who comes by for an hour every morning. It makes life so much easier!
I’m grateful for morning moments. Mornings are fast-paced at our house. There’s no time for sitting down to enjoy a leisurely breakfast. Within the chaos, however, there can be moments of meaningful connection: when Laura asks me to do up the clasp on her necklace, when I give Bryson a quick snuggle, and when I drive my teenage son Connor to school.
And yes, I’m grateful for coffee. I like the way coffee tastes and I like the way coffee makes me feel alive in the morings. But I’m also grateful at how easy it is to make. I have a wonderful Chemex pour-over coffee maker that I use to make an incredible pot of coffee on special occasions. But mostly I use my Keurig to make a quick cup.
What about you? Are you grateful for mornings? What else are you grateful for today?
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Personal Revolution with Allison Task
Allison Task, author of the book Personal (R)evolution, joins host Keith McArthur to share her tips to help you reach your biggest goals and wildest dreams.
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Episode 35 Show Notes
[00:00] Welcome and Intro
[00:57] Featured interview with Allison Task
Allison Task is author of Personal (R)evolution: How to Be Happy, Change Your Life and Do That Thing You’ve Always Wanted. Allison has worked with dot-com startups, as a TV chef, and now as life and career coach.
In this conversation, Keith and Allison discuss:
Allison’s career: from dot-com to celebrity chef to life coach [1:38]
Rejection as a gift [7:30]
Allison’s on her book Personal Revolution [9:31]
The one thing all of Allison’s clients have in common [10:50]
The Pigmalian Effect [14:14]
The Disney model: Creatives, Planners, Critics [19:56]
Identifying your stakeholders [23:56]
[25:35] Allison’s Instruction Manual
1. What are the habits you maintain every day to stay happy and healthy? [26:00]
Go to sleep by 9:30 every night
2. What personal development book do you recommend? [26:43]
The Kama Sutra
“Having good sex can be fun. And are you connecting to the people closest to you?”
3. Favorite personal mantra / inspirational quote [27:42]
“If you want to increase your success rate, double your failure rate.” — Thomas J. Watson
4. What’s your one guilty pleasure? [28:35]
Chocolate
Hugging and kissing her kids too much
5. When your time comes, how do you want to be remembered? [30:24]
“As someone who had a positive impact on others.”
[31:06] Where to find Allison
Website: Allisontask.com
Twitter: @allisontask
Facebook: /allisontask
[31:46] Closing words
Feedback & Connect
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June 4, 2018
Boosting Emotional Awareness
Joelle Anderson, a therapist and mindfulness coach, reveals how meditation can help boost our emotional awareness. And host Keith McArthur speaks with fitness contributor Kathleen Trotter about how to pack a gym in your suitcase when you travel.
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Episode 34 Show Notes
[00:00] Welcome and Intro
[1:00] Mindfulness contributor Joelle Anderson on Emotional Awareness
Joelle Anderson is a therapist specializing in mindfulness meditation and creator and host of the Kernel of Wisdom YouTube channel.
In this conversation, Keith and Joelle discuss:
What do we mean by “emotional awareness” [1:40]
We suppress positive emotions as well as negative ones [2:55]
The downside of emotional awareness [4:21]
Where to find Joelle [5:15]
Kernelofwisdom.com
YouTube.com/KernelofWisdom1
[5:54] Fitness contributor Kathleen Trotter on a Gym in Your Suitcase
Kathleen Trotter is author of Finding Your Fit: A Compassionate Trainer’s Guide to Making Fitness a Lifelong Habit
In this conversation, Keith and Kathleen discuss:
What Kathleen packs in her suitcase [6:13]
Three types of fitness travelers [9:52]
The importance of having a Plan B [11:36]
Where to find Kathleen [13:29]
KatheenTrotter.com
Instagram: KathleenTrotterFitness
Twitter: KTrotterFitness
Facebook: KathleenTrotter
[13:49] Closing words
Feedback & Connect
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Keith on Twitter: @KeithMcArthur
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May 28, 2018
Why Life Gets Better After 50 with Jonathan Rauch
Jonathan Rauch, author of The Happiness Curve, explains the science behind why life gets better in our fifties and sixties. Jonathan and host Keith McArthur each share their own happiness curve stories.
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Episode 33 Show Notes
[00:00] Welcome and Intro
[00:58] Featured interview with Jonathan Rauch
Jonathan Rauch is author of several books including 2018’s The Happiness Curve: Why Life Gets Better After 50. He is a senior fellow at the Brookings Institution in Washington.
In this conversation, Keith and Jonathan discuss:
Keith’s happiness curve [00:58]
Jonathan’s happiness curve [02:31]
What is the happiness curve? [5:10]
The happiness curve isn’t an inevitability; it’s a tenancy [7;19]
Be cautious about making big life changes during the trough [9:05]
How the happiness curve is different from a midlife crisis [10:20]
Why the midlife trough is good for us [11:55]
Tips to help you get through the trough [16:45]
Tips for society to manage the trough [20:25]
[22:54] Jonathan’s Instruction Manual
1. What are the habits you maintain every day to stay happy and healthy? [23:20]
Exercise
Talk to someone he’ll disagree with and / or read something he’ll disagree with
2. What personal development book do you recommend? [24:45]
The Happiness Hypothesis by Jonathan Haidt
3. Favorite personal mantra / inspirational quote [26:08]
“The Moving Finger writes; and, having writ, Moves on: nor all thy Piety nor Wit. Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line, Nor all thy Tears wash out a Word of it.” — Omar Khayyám / Edward Fitzgerald
“Just remember that if you see five problems coming towards you, four of them will fall into the ditch before they ever reach you.” — Calvin Coolidge
4. What’s your one guilty pleasure? [27:32]
Dark chocolate
5. When your time comes, how do you want to be remembered? [28:03]
“As being kind and wise, and especially as being kinder and wiser than I am right now.”
[28:37] Where to find Jonathan
Website: happinesscurvebook.com
[29:10] Closing words
Feedback & Connect
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May 21, 2018
Resolutions and Healthy Snacking
Nutrition contributor Michelle Jaelin provides advice on healthy snacking. And host Keith McArthur announces the topic of his next book: Resolutions.
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Episode 32 Show Notes
[00:00] Welcome and Intro
Keith’s next book will be about resolutions [00:59]
The three resolutions Keith is setting as part of his research for the book [01:43]
Keith shares feedback from readers about their own guilty pleasures [4:08]
[6:20] Nutrition contributor Michelle Jaelin on Healthy Snacking
Michelle Jaelin is both a trained artist and a Registered Dietitian who is known as The NutritionArtist. She appears regularly as in newspapers, magazines and on television as an expert in healthy eating.
In this conversation, Keith and Michelle discuss:
A healthy snack combines produce (fruits and vegetables) with protein [6:59]
Healthy fats can also be part of healthy snacking [7:33]
Try to have healthy snacks on hand. They’re hard to find when you’re out and suddenly have cravings [9:01}
Where to find Michelle:
Twitter: @nutritionartist
Instagram: /nutritionartist
Facebook: /nutritionartistRD
[10:06] Closing words
Feedback & Connect
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Email: keith@myinstructionmanual.com
Keith on Twitter: @KeithMcArthur
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May 18, 2018
Announcing My Next Book: Resolutions
The next book in the My Instruction Manual series will be all about resolutions.
Right now, I’m busy learning as much as I can about why some resolutions succeed and others fail.
As part of my research, I’ve decided to set three resolutions for myself. One thing I’ve learned: Resolutions don’t need to start on Jan. 1. In fact, there are good arguments about why it’s better not to start on that date.
So here are my “New Year’s” resolutions for the year beginning May 18, 2018.
Resolution #1: Finish the first draft of my Resolutions book by Aug. 3.
Even though I believe resolutions don’t have to start on New Year’s Day, I’m well aware that this is the day most people choose to kick off their resolutions. To be able to take advantage of the “resolution season” for PR and sales, it’s critical that my book come out early in the fall. I’m self-publishing this book, which means my turnaround times can be faster, but I still need to get this draft done by early August.
Resolution #2: Apply sunscreen every day
There’s pretty clear evidence that applying sunscreen every day not only delays the aging process but also reduces your risk of skin cancer. For transplant recipients like me, this is especially important. First, I’m on prophylactic antibiotics for life that have a side-effect of making my skin much more vulnerable to ultra-violent light. Second, because of my lowered immune system, my body isn’t able to do a great job of fighting off skin cancers. (I take a bunch of drugs that lower my immunity so my body won’t reject the new kidney).
Resolution #3: Get my weight down to 205 pounds by Aug. 3
For most of the past 25 years, my weight has fluctuated between abut 215 and 235 pounds. But I left the hospital after my transplant weighing 210 pounds. Over the last year, my weight has bounced between 210 and 215, but over the past few weeks it’s been tilting above 215. I want to get my weight down to 205 pounds by the time I’m finished the first draft of my book.
Updates
Over the next few weeks, I’ll be writing more about my upcoming book and what I’m learning about resolutions. And, because I’ve learned that being public about resolutions — and the accountability that comes with that — boosts success, I will be sharing my progress here.
Can I include you in my book?
I’m looking to profile people who have been successful at setting and keeping resolutions. These don’t need to be New Year’s Resolutions; in fact you don’t even need to think of them as resolutions. Rather, I’m looking to interview people who have set out to make huge changes in their lives — in areas like health, finance, relationships and careers — and been successful at them. If you’re game, please let me know in the comments or send me an email at keith@myinstructionmanual.com.
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May 14, 2018
I’m Grateful for Moms
Today, I’m grateful for moms.
Thirteen months ago, I got a second chance at life when my little sister donated a kidney to me. I’ve got so much to be grateful for, so once a month, I take time to identify and reflect on my blessings.
During this Mother’s Day month, I am grateful for moms, especially the three most important moms in my life.
They are my own mother, the mother of my children, and my mother-in-law.
While each is unique, there is one quality they all share: A kind toughness.
All three will do anything for their children, and other people they love. But they also have a toughness that allows them to achieve seemingly impossible things that mere mortals (like me) could not.
My Mom
I am grateful for my own mother, Margaret Ann McArthur (né Donald).
She devoted her work life to helping others in health care, first as a practicing nurse, and later in infection control where she stopped the spread of infections through the hospital. And she devoted the rest of her time to helping her family. She was always there for her three children, and took care of my dad when he was dying of cancer. And to this day, she cannot resist the call to help one of her four grandchildren.
And of course, I’m grateful that she raised her children to take care of each other so both my sisters were ready and willing to save my life by donating a kidney.
The Mom of My Children
There are dozens of reasons why I won the spousal lottery when I married Laura. One is that she is the such an incredible mother.
Parenting is not easy for us. Our youngest son Bryson has severe developmental challenges. He is non-verbal, needs a wheelchair to get around, and has violent seizures. And our other son is a teenager. (Sorry Connor. Obligatory teenager joke).
But with patience, love and grace, Laura has taken an incredibly difficult situation and made it look easy. It is in large part because of her that our boys are growing into such amazing young men. And when I struggle as a parent, Laura is there to kindly help me get back on track.
My Mother-in-Law
From the moment I first met Kathleen Williams (né Fitzgerald), she welcomed me into her home and treated me like one of her own children.
I am so grateful to have two such loving and accepting families, and that Laura’s parents are so wonderful to Connor and Bryson.
And I’m especially grateful that Jim and Kathy raised Laura to be such an incredible woman (and Mom!)
Thanks Mom! Thanks Laura! Thanks Mom W! I’m so grateful for you and love you all so much.
What about you? Are you grateful for moms? What else are you grateful for today?
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