JohnA Passaro's Blog, page 14
May 27, 2020
Everything Matters
Your beliefs become your thoughts,
Your thoughts become your words,
Your words become your actions,
Your actions become your habits,
Your habits become your values,
Your values become your destiny.
Gandhi
Water boils at 212 degrees.
At 211 degrees, water is just hot.
Every degree is needed to bring water to combustion.
If even one degree doesn’t do its job, water will not boil, it will just remain hot.
I attest that we all have 212 degrees to make our lives boil.
Every degree Is needed to bring our lives to combustion.
I attest that at 211 degrees our lives are just hot.
I attest there are no small things in life.
Each one degree can be the missing catalyst to your life boiling or being just hot.
Every degree matters.
****
Imagine that your goal is this mountain in the distance ahead of you, and you desire to get to this mountain within the next four years.
In everything that you do during your journey towards the mountain ask yourself,
“Is what I am about to do going to take me closer to the mountain, or is it going to take me further away from it?”
If the answer is that it is going to take you closer to the mountain, you do it.
If it takes you even one inch further from the mountain, you don’t.
It is that simple.
By eliminating the things in your life that takes you further from your goal, you immediately become closer to your goal.
****
In wrestling, everything matters.
Every pound matters.
Every second matters.
Every point matters.
Every day matters.
Everything matters.
In life, everything matters.
Every second matters.
Every day matters.
Every word matters.
Every dollar matters.
Everything matters.
Everything Matters
Is a chapter from,
May 24, 2020
Living Above the Rim
As I picked up the container of the Starbucks cold Black coffee ready to pour it, like I do everyday to start my morning, my mind went into immediate calculation mode.
“It could be.”
“It definitely could be.”
My mind was referring to the quest for the all elusive exact match of the amount of liquid left in the container with the maximum capacity of liquid to be held in my glass search I’ve always been on.
The quest for such things makes life interesting. Cosmic.
The other day, while pumping gas, the pump stopped on exactly $40.00
I know there is a 1 in 100 chance of it happening, for the pump to stop at 0.00, but it seems like I’ve pumped my gas thousands of times and I don’t recall it happening more than once or twice.
A mathematical anomaly.
Getting back to the capacity of my glass and the amount of dark coffee left in my container, as I started to pour the coffee into the glass my suspicion grew.
At the halfway point I truly felt that this could be the match.
Three quarters worth of pouring and my excitement built.
Then it happened.
The glass was full and the container was emptied.
An exact match.
I stood before my glass with awe.
As I went to throw out the empty container of coffee my heart dropped.
There was more left in the container. Not much more, but more.
I had to push the envelope.
Standing over my full glass of cold black coffee I raised the near empty container above the glass and slowly turned it upside down.
Slowly, very slowly, I transferred the remaining liquid contents from the container into the glass.
The glass wasn’t full after all.
It absorbed more.
The liquid rose to the top rim of the glass.
I had to keep going.
I picked up the container of black coffee and looked inside it. There had to be another drop left inside there.
There was.
So I chanced a near perfect match with my curiosity to see how much my glass could hold.
Without spillage.
I really thought I was going to cause spillage and ruin a perfect match of capacity of glass to volume of liquid left in container.
So, I very carefully tilted the container.
After some time, a drip of darkness appeared and fell into the full glass.
No spillage.
Amazing.
Why was the perceived 100% full glass able to absorb more?
A convex meniscus occurred.
The amount of liquid raised above the rim of the glass in a curve to prevent spillage.
Our lives are the same way.
This is a very important piece of how the universe operates to understand.
As soon as we think our lives are full of darkness, when we feel we absolutely can not take one more thing happening, without losing it, without spilling over, we are introduced to the Universal law of Convex Meniscus and we learn that we can.
Only when it is absolutely needed, The Universal law of Convex meniscus appears in our lives.
It may appear through a loved one taking on some of the volume in our lives, or a friend receding the waters by providing an ear to listen to our worries, or by us believing we can take on more in our lives, more above the rim, the point where it doesn’t make logical sense to be able to store more.
When you feel your life is full, remember this picture of my cold Starbucks black coffee.
You can take on more than you think.
Convex meniscus.
What a concept.
Family, friends, loved ones, kindness live above the rim of our lives.
They are the reason we are able to handle more than our glass worth.
For all of JohnA Passaro’s books go to
May 20, 2020
Accomplishment
Working without success requires great strength of character.
Kent Nerburn
Dancing with the Gods.
May 19, 2020
The Best Day
Have you ever wondered “What will be the best day of my life?”
There will be one.
Will it be today?
Whatever day that will be in your life – will you know it at the time?
Will you recognize the signs?
Will your mood welcome that day and allow you to maximize every second of it.
Or will you be so apathetic and blasé about life and opportunity that you won’t recognize your greatest day alive which is dancing and singing right in front of you?
You have to trust and live life like your best day of your life has not yet been lived or experienced as of yet.
And I guarantee by living that way, that even if it has been lived already, that you will have many, many close seconds.
May 17, 2020
Putting It Out Into the Universe
This is a chapter from Strange Angels
Where the path of the wind
Excerpt chapter from Strange Angels
Crosses that of the stars.
Camino de Santiago
Pilgrimage inscription
It is late in the evening.
I am watching an episode of “Chicago Med.”
A doctor has just learned that his terminally ill patient, who is in a clinical trial, has been receiving a placebo instead of a promising clinical trial drug.
He realizes she will surely die.
He is distraught.
So much so that he wants to interfere with the trial.
He wants to illegally switch out the placebo his client is getting and replace it with the promising clinical trial drug.
He rationalizes to himself that saving a life is worth the risk of losing his medical license.
He confides his plan with a friend and lets him know his intentions.
Isn’t he supposed to save lives? He asks himself.
His friend talks him out of interfering with the integrity of the clinical trial.
The doctor finally resigns himself not to interfere with the clinical trial; knowing his decision will ultimately lead to his patient’s demise.
After coming to terms with his decision and acknowledging the strings he had to pull to get his patient into the trial, and the hope it gave her after she learned that she was accepted, he says,
“It was all for nothing.”
And his friend responds,
“I think if we care, then, whatever happens, it’s for something.
We might not see the effect, but it goes out there, and it circulates in the universe.
It makes us all a little better. “
–
Then it dawns on me.
All I can do is to be the overmatched wrestler who is unwilling to surrender his will and fights off his back for as long as there is time on my clock.
All I can do is to put my struggle publicly out there into the universe.
And then the Universe will circulate it around for it to reach its intended destination.
I have faith that it will get there.
I believe that.
Maybe, by sharing my struggle with the world will help someone else with their struggle and help them in their journey.
Often, I look back to understand what I initially thought was part of my journey, actually was my role in helping someone else in their journey.
As I stated before, it is hard to understand which is happening when.
I know one thing though, if the Universe has given Jess the placebo in her recovery, the care and love which has been created has been cast off into the universe and is circulating, making someone feel a little better.
And that is something.
Something very important to me.
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May 13, 2020
Strange Angels Quotes
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May 12, 2020
The Contest
We have all seen the contest where a person in a bank vault has 360 seconds to grab as much money as possible.
If it were you, would you stop grabbing money after you had “just enough” in your hands?
Would you stop grabbing money when there were only 60 seconds left?
Would you ever be too tired to keep grabbing more money?
Obviously, not.
Why?
Because the reward of what that money can do for you overrides any of the reasons to stop.
A wrestling match is the same type of contest.
You need to have the same kind of mindset.
To a wrestler, points are money.
In each match, you have 360 seconds to score as many points as possible.
When the whistle blows, the allure of scoring points must override any and all obstacles.
Have a safe lead?
Need to score more points.
Have short time?
Need to score more points.
Have a fear of losing?
Need to score more points.
As with the money grab, the only time you stop scoring points is when there is no time left in the contest.
This is the first chapter from the book
Dominate
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May 7, 2020
Strange Angels – New Release – Preview
People and events are rarely
Who and what we think they are.
They are more meaningful,
More worth our attention.
Part of some finely choreographed eternal dance
That we would be wise to bow down before
In gratitude and humility.
Elizabeth Lesser
Broken Open
The beginning of the high school wrestling season is a great time of the year.
It is a time of alchemy when wrestlers anxiously await the magic of having their hard work transform into gold.
Even though my two sons have graduated, I still follow the Long Island High School wrestling scene very closely.
It is great to see the young wrestlers whom I witnessed work so hard for many years develop and become successful.
It is the night before the start of the 2015-2016 High School season. I send a text to a father of an up and coming young wrestler, a wrestler who is about to get rewarded for his years of hard work and effort. His junior season starts tomorrow.
“Your son ready for the season?” I text.
I immediately get a text back,
“He’s decided not to wrestle this year.”
Obviously, this is a joke meant to stir up the “imagine” gene in me.
“No, really – who is his first match against?” I ask.
“No, really, he says it’s not worth it anymore.
He says that he has worked as hard as he could work and hasn’t been able to get to the next level. That all the work he is putting in is not bearing fruit, so he is going to quit,” he responds.
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“What is your address?” I ask. “I’m coming over.”
A return text appears with his address and the question,“Are you sure?”
It is then I realize it’s after 10 pm, and he lives forty-five minutes away.
“I’m sure – see you in 45 minutes,” I text back.
“Thank you,” he replies.
The highest reward for a person’s toil
Is not what they get for it,
But what they become by it.
John Ruskin
Forty-five minutes later, I arrive at his house.
He is waiting for me at the door.
As I enter, he thanks me once again and then disappears to leave me alone with his son, who’s slumped over at the kitchen table.
“Talk to me,” I start out.
After some time, the young wrestler confides in me that he feels like he has worked all of his life and that he hasn’t seen any reward for his efforts. He has mistakenly determined that wrestling is just not worth it anymore.
“Let me tell you a little story,” I start out.
I won’t make-believe that I was this great wrestler.
I wasn’t.
But I do know a little something about dedicating your life to something and feeling unrewarded.
When I was your age, I gave six years of my life to this sport, and I never got to stand on the top step of the podium in the tournament I set to do so in.
I walked away, feeling like I didn’t achieve what I set out to do.
I loved the sport of wrestling.
But, I also hated the sport for not reciprocating my love.
I left the sport feeling my six years weren’t worth it; that they were a total waste of time and effort.
It took me many years to realize that even though I never accomplished my goals in wrestling, wrestling achieved its goals in me.
They call wrestling the greatest sport on earth for a reason.
It just took me twenty-six years to understand why.
You see, you are on a journey.
Right now, you think the journey is about winning wrestling matches.
One day, many years from now, you will realize it’s about so much more.
Silently, this sport is building within you everything you will need to be successful in your life; but only if you allow it to.
Now, you only feel the pain of plateaus, of loss, and unfulfilled dreams.
It’s chaos.
But there are lessons within the chaos.
The lessons are the hidden jewels.
And they are very important.
More important than winning.
One day you will understand that.
If I can convince you of only one thing, let it be this,
you need to trust in the process.
I believe the lucky ones in this sport, which I consider myself to be one, get something far more important than being able to stand on top of a podium for a few seconds.
They get a way to live life.
And that lasts so much longer than the length of an awards ceremony.
It lasts your whole life.
I know you are having a hard time reconciling the work you have put in and the lack of rewards you have seen for your effort.
You are exerting more work than you are getting rewards back in return. You are in the midst of a plateau.
Understand this,
So many people give up on their dreams during plateaus.
Don’t.
Plateaus are a filtering system to greatness.
They are a time to quit or recommit.
Recommit.
Wrestling is about learning how to fight, then using that fight to be able to beat whatever life throws at you.
Whether you wrestle this year or not, is up to you.
But understand this, there will be a time in your life when you will be in the fight of your life, facing an opponent much bigger than you, and you will be called upon to win something much more important than a wrestling match.
Not only for yourself, but for your family.
One day your family may be faced with a death, a divorce, a diagnosis, or a random act of violence.
The one thing I know for sure is your family will be much better prepared to win that fight, with you having wrestled.
Forget about plateaus and getting to the next level.
Just trust in the process
And I can assure you,
You will be rewarded in the end.
That is why you should wrestle.”
I am open to the guidance of synchronicity,
And do not let expectations hinder my path.
Dalia Lama
I made it back home after midnight, and I spent the next few hours marveling at how the Divine orchestrated an event in my life that got me to say to someone else what I needed to hear myself.
“You have to trust the work you are immersing yourself in, is either going to produce your desired result or equip you with the tools needed to conquer a more critical future endeavor. One you neither understand nor are fully aware of at this moment.
Trust in the process.”
I am starting to take notice the more aligned I am with my soul, the more Divine synchronicity I have in my life.
I believe the measurement of success in my life comes down to this, whether the sound of my soul is getting louder or dimming.
I’m starting to learn to embrace people, actions, and events that make the sound of my soul louder.
Clearer.
I am starting to trust its path fully.
Nancy Long said,
“Whether we name divine presence, synchronicity, serendipity, or graced moment matters little. What matters is the reality that our hearts have been understood. Nothing is as real as a healthy dose of magic, which restores our spirits.”
Strange Angels is the 4th book in the “Every Breath is Gold Series” Collection.
It is a standalone book, although, I believe you will enjoy it more having read:
Book 1 – 6 Minutes Wrestling with Life
Separation
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When the rare event of the melding of a great coach and a great athlete occurs, magic is made.
Taken from the 1970 Sports Illustrated article on Steve Prefontaine: (The full article link is below – well worth the read)
When asked what separated Steve Prefontaine from other elite runners, Coach Dellinger’s responded:
Q: “There are hundreds of young runners around the world who don’t want to lose.
But they do.
What separates your guy?”
A: “Our young man, is blessed with a cardiovascular system that is so superior to the average human that it is almost unbelievable.”
The full 1970 Sports Illustrated article on Steve Prefontaine
April 28, 2020
Eclipse
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Eclipse is a chapter excerpt from the newly released book
“Strange Angels”
In a dark time,
The eye begins to see.
Theodore Roethke
August 21, 2017
I don’t have answers to why the Universe does what it does.
Or why it aligns people, places, or events in our lives that put our world into total darkness.
Sometimes, I believe it does it to prove that the light will always prevail over darkness.
Eight years ago, to the day, events aligned in my life to send my world into total darkness.
Today, the Universe flexed its muscles and decided to send the whole world into total darkness for two minutes and forty seconds as a gentle reminder to me and everyone else of the vast power of its light.
The solar eclipse of 2017 was a rare celestial event that both humbled and elevated me.
Viewing the eclipse on social media made me feel like I was this small person on this small planet being shown this grand cosmic spectacle.
It gave me a sense of how fragile our world and our lives are.
I also felt enthralled.
The darkness of the eclipse was total and all-consuming.
The sight of the light was awe-inspiring.
I was mesmerized.
I was not alone.
Millions of people gathered outside their houses to see it.
Some traveled thousands of miles to experience it, to be in its presence, to get a glimpse of its totality.
What is it about a total eclipse that attracts people’s wonder?
Is it the total and complete darkness that attracts people?
No, if it were, people would marvel at the night.
Is it the light that attracts people?
No, if it were, people would be amazed every time they flipped a light switch on in their own kitchen.
I attest the attraction is neither the darkness nor the light, but the battle between the two.
I believe what attracts the human race to marvel at a total eclipse is how the light fights to continue to shine despite the totality of the darkness it is consumed in.
No matter how dark things may seem, the light always finds a way to emanate through.
Sometimes, it takes total and complete darkness to see the absolute power and magnificence of the light.
Today, with America being the most divided it has ever been, the Universe decided to unite the human race with a celestial event.
A free celestial sky show, for all to see.
I attest eclipses are not rare events at all.
Each of us has darkness in our every day lives.
And each of us has awe-inspiring light in our lives, too.
Our human spirit.
Why does it take a rare natural event for us to appreciate our everyday world?
There are miracles all around us each day.
To experience this celestial event, people traveled thousands of miles to see the darkness, or the light shining through it.
I’m not sure if they knew themselves.
But if each person just became more aware of their miraculous events in their lives, they could experience it every day.
There are people the Universe has used as total eclipses in the history of our world.
Where, for some unknown reasons, events aligned that attacked their world with total darkness, but somehow their light fought to awe-inspiringly shine through.
People like Helen Keller, Anne Frank, Eli Weisel,
Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., Nelson Mandela.
These are the well-known people whose light we all have drawn from.
I believe there are everyday people in each of our lives whose light, when we come into its presence, transforms us.
These are our own personal Strange Angels.
To those who are in the midst of a serious struggle, know, you are strong enough to endure.
To prosper.
To shine.
To give off light.
And it is that light which emanates through your darkness, which transcends our spirit.
In your darkest hour, remember,
The light always prevails.
Eclipse
Is a chapter excerpt from
The newly released book
Strange Angels
