Andy Zaltzman's Blog, page 15

A bit of spiritual fumigation

England: unconscionably heroic at the World Twenty20
© Getty Images



 

Hello Confectionery Stallers, and apologies for my long break from the hallowed virtual turf of Cricinfo. I have been immersed in my other life as a political comedian, attempting to mine comedy and/or sense (preferably both, but often neither) from the chaos of the British general election. With this nation now retreating from the verge of civil war, and with the prospect of the Russians...

The best apples, Pakistan's latest bans, and an interview with Sir Scruton Wole

Why legspinners will rule this county season. The cricketer with a collection of fruit preserves in his garden. The great IPL Loyalty Auction. A little chat with the world's oldest living first-class cricketer, aka the man behind Bodyline. And, of course, more lies about cricketers. In this the last World Cricket Podcast before it goes on a break. Sob.



Read the transcript here

Download the podcast here (mp3, 8.2MB, right-click to save).

The James Tredwell Story, and New Zealand's Wilf Rhodes

Tim Murtagh finds out giant antacids cannot be used to bounce out a batsman
© PA Photos



 

Hello again, Confectionery Stallers. Break out your picnic baskets, don your sombreros, and ring work to tell them you're feeling a bit ill and will be off sick for the next six months − the English domestic season has begun.Admittedly, it began yesterday in what traditionalists would vociferously bark was (a) the wrong month, (b) the wrong country, and (c) the wrong wea...

Thank you Sir Graeme Swann

There is danger in watching Yusuf Pathan hit sixes, even from the comfort of your couch. Be warned. Also some fun Bangladesh stats, interviews with Alex Bowden and Justin Hamilton, and more lies about cricketers, including a shocking one about Alan Davidson and lettuce.



Read the transcript of the podcast here

Download the podcast here (mp3, 13.5MB, right-click to save).

PCB joins surrealist art movement

When will Younis Khan and Mohammad Yousuf return? Tomorrow? Never? Yesterday?
© AFP
  Another week, another dose of the crazy virus runs through Pakistan cricket − their two best batsmen banned indefinitely for bickering like schoolgirls (not the official PCB wording), two more seasoned internationals jettisoned for a year, Afridi on probation for mistaking the ball for a toffee apple, and the Akmals told off for being naughty. All of which will, apparently, "go a lo...

'One-over cricket is the future'

The reincarnation of Phil Tufnell, the age at which cricketers average the highest, a super one-question quiz, more stats than you can shake a stick at, lies about cricketers, and the first in the Annoying Things About Cricket series. Truly, we are blessed



Read the transcript of the podcast here

Download the podcast here (mp3, 6669kb, right-click to save).

Why Tendulkar will hit another 57 Test centuries

The moustache has it: as his facial hair bloomed, so did Graham Gooch's average
© Getty Images



 

Hello Confectionery Stallers. I have been busily mining some Tendulkar statistics for you, only to find that I had been beaten to it by Cricinfo's Caesar Of Statistics, S Rajesh, in this as-always illuminating piece on the Mumbai Marvel's recent renaissance. This reached a stunning peak with his historic one-day double-hundred in Gwalior last week – a useful innings in any...

An apology to Amla, and a fountain of stats

Andy Zaltzman eats his meals off a table made of Wisdens, and to prove it, here's a torrent of stats for your delectation. Including incontrovertible proof of why Chris Tavaré was better than Virender Sehwag, and why the Waughs were, frankly, crap. Plus, the inevitable lies about cricketers - starring Kiran More, John Waite and others. All this plus an option to subscribe via iTunes. Yippee is all I can say.here (mp3, right-...

Special Steyn stats edition

The first bowler with four 10-wicket match hauls to be pictured wearing this particular model of sunglasses
© AP



 

Here are the bonus Dale Steyn statistics promised in Friday's Confectionery Stall , for the benefit of: (a) Dale Steyn fans; (b) stats fans; (c) anyone relieved to see devastating spells of fast swing bowling alive and well; and (d) Dale Steyn. Some of the numbers might already be out of date once the second Test is underway, if Sehwag starts giving him a...