Margaret McSweeney's Blog, page 55

Celebration after the Winnowing Process

Spiced ciders, warm fire place, the smell of freshly baked bread from the oven are all smells I love during the fall season. Besides all the yummy foods to eat and company to be had during the fall season I have decided it is much more than all of that, it is a time of true thankfulness.

At the beginning of the fall season, harvesting begins. During the harvesting season farmers gather their crops from the fields marking the end of the growing season. Our Christian walk has been compared to a farmer’s harvest.

And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. Gal. 6:9 (ESV)

For Christians the growing season is often filled with pain and we cannot see what the Lord is teaching us during this period of time. But hold strong, the harvest is coming!

The book of Ruth was written during harvest season, and they celebrate the beginning of Harvest with a huge feast and celebration. But before there is a feast the barley has to go through the threshing floor. To “thresh” the grain means to hit the wheat or barley plants until the grain falls out. The grain was then thrown into the air and the evening wind would blow away the chaff. The chaff surrounds the part of the plant that was the grain. The chaff would blow away and the grain would remain, this was the winnowing process (basically to get rid of the undesirable parts, the chaff was used to kindle their fire). So what you have left is the good, refined grain ready for people to enjoy.

God does the same thing to us. First we are planted somewhere to grow, we are watered, cared for, and allowed to flourish. Then just as the plant we are set to dry out during a season, I call this our desert time. Then life comes at us hard and we are cut down from where we were growing. We are then thrown on the thrashing floor where the chaff and the grain are separated. The chaff being anything in our lives that is not pleasing to God, images we have formed, bad habits we have developed, etc… Then we enter the winnowing process where only the good stuff remain and the rest is blown away and used for fire. God removed of all the undesirables in us. What we have left is what is good, what is refined and what is pleasing to God.

I love a good party just as much as the next person. So once there is a harvesting and the grain is refined there is a big celebration. In the bible, Boaz was celebrating the Feast of Shavuot, which one of the things celebrated was “first fruits”. This symbolized the very first grains of the Harvest, and a promise of the rest of the harvest to come, of the resurrection of all of God’s people.

This is why I like Fall! It represents a time of celebration, and time of surviving the growing, threshing, and winnowing period of my life. It is a time to give thanks for the blessings in my life.

Stepping Out

“She makes her own bedspreads.
She dresses in fine linen and purple gowns.”
~Proverbs 31:22

We are all familiar with the expression, “When I am old, I shall wear purple!” It’s a declaration of independence, of coming of age, of boldly stepping out, of no longer being held back by “What will others think of me or say about me?”

It’s no wonder that purple has earned a place of honor on the color wheel. Purple is associated with royalty. In ancient times, purple was the most precious of dyes. It required 250,000 mollusks to make one ounce. That doesn’t paint a very pretty picture of this precious color, but it does account for its great price back in the day! It was highly valued in Israel; so much so that God specified purple in His design of the tabernacle and temple. Royal robes and garments of the wealthy were purple. Purple set people and places apart from the ordinary.

But this woman did not just wear purple. She also wore linen. Linen is a special fabric. It allows circulation: the perfect choice for a hot day in the middle east! Linen was worn by the wealthy, by kings, queens. It was worn by priests and used in places of worship. Ordinary linen. Fine linen. There was a difference…and this woman wore fine linen!

So, what will we think of her, this woman stepping out in her purple and linen?

Does it make you want to just dismiss her?

Or does it make you want to know her better?

Your answer may reflect more about you than it does about her. Maybe she exposes deep insecurities, jealousy, envy, our own striving for the finer things in life, our own battle with identity, our self-esteem. We’re missing the point. 1 Peter 3:3-4 has something to say about this:

“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.”

It’s hard to imagine that a man would tell us not to take care of our outer appearance! But, the emphasis here is not to follow some sort of dress code or self-denial. Peter is saying that we women need to get our priorities right. We need to spend as much or even more time caring for our inner beauty as we do on our outward beauty, because our true source of beauty is the beauty of our heart.

Ladies, when we make this inner beauty our priority, we overcome our insecurities. We’re no longer striving for the prize in the beauty contest. The battle is over because we know we are loved by God Himself. And we are loving, LoVing, LOVING each other as Christ loves us! And, nothing compares to living in the loving support of our sisters in Christ.

THAT is what this woman is about! She is not afraid to wear fine linen and purple because she is a Daughter of the King and she knows it from the inside out. Everything she does flows from that deep place within.

If you have *accepted Jesus Christ into your heart and life, YOU are a daughter of the King too! Don’t wait until you’re old to wear purple! Step out with confidence in the person God has created you to be. Girlfriend, let’s do life together!

Truth from Nature

One of my favorite spots in our house is the sunroom. Tall windows on three sides and a French door overlook our small back yard where an entire menagerie of wild animals lives. In the four years since we moved here we’ve seen skunks (Jake, my youngest golden retriever has a particular talent for finding them), an armadillo, a family of raccoons and most recently a possum. Bluejays, cardinals, doves, and a lone hawk dart in and out among the old oak trees shading our back yard. We’ve grown accustomed to them and miss them on the days they don’t appear.

Last spring, I brought my manuscript and a tall glass of iced tea into the sunroom intending to spend a few hours editing and revising. Movement in the tree out in the corner of the yard caught my eye. I picked up my binoculars and spotted a little gray squirrel making multiple trips up and down the trunk. I finally realized that something had disturbed her nest and she was moving her babies to a safer location. One at a time. She didn’t stop until every baby had been rescued and moved. Apparently nothing was too difficult for her if it meant keeping her youngsters safe.

I was mesmerized by her industry and humbled by her patience. I thought of the times just that week when my lack of patience had left me frustrated and out of sorts. I arrived at the dry cleaners only to find it locked and a “Be Right Back” sign on the door. I grumbled to myself. What kind of business locks its customers out in the middle of the day? I went on to the grocery store. Schools were out for a holiday and the aisles were crammed with mothers pushing those huge carts shaped like trains or cars, meant to entertain the small children riding in them, but completely blocking my access to the Blue Bell ice cream case. And another thing. Why did the grocery store reserve parking spaces right by the door for “Parents with Child?” Those parents are usually in their twenties and thirties whereas I am…um..not in that category. My knees hurt. My hips hurt. Why can’t those twenty- somethings park farther away and let me have a primo space by the door?

Sitting in traffic on the way home, I took out the notebook I carry almost everywhere and it fell open to a verse from Colossians I had jotted down at a worship service several months earlier. Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothes yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. ( Colossians 3:12 NIV)

In the chaos of modern day life, it’s easy to get overwhelmed and when we do that, we fail to appreciate the gift of simply being alive. I thought again of that wise little creature moving her babies one by one and resolved to be more patient in my own life. Nature can teach us so many things if we are willing to watch and listen. What truths have you learned in this way?

***

An accomplished author in the secular market, Dorothy Love makes her inspirational fiction debut with her Hickory Ridge series of historicals set in her native South. Her skillful blending of the historical and the personal reflect her passion for discovering the histories of ordinary people who accomplished extraordinary things and set her apart as an authoritative voice of Southern historical fiction. Connect with Dorothy on her website: dorothylovebooks.com

Those Closest to Us Hurt Us the Most

Those closest to us hurt us the most. Maybe it’s because they say foolish things in an effort to protect us or because they know us so well, they know what “button” to push to hurt us, or feel the freedom to speak too freely! Those in our outer circles, whom we don’t know well, may randomly hurt us for the moment with their actions or words, but we can more easily brush that off because we don’t have the same level of closeness to them as to our close friends and family.

When our son was initially diagnosed with mental retardation and cerebral palsy, a patient of my husband (a dentist) sent us a lovely card sharing a scripture verse to encourage us about remaining strong in the Lord and waiting upon Him. It was truly a sweet encouragement. What was hurtful, was some years later, she made a comment to us about the miscarriage of her grandchild, saying, “I know my daughter is having a hard time going through this miscarriage, but God probably took the baby because it might have had all kinds of problems. That would have meant a lifetime of troubles for them.” That comment left us feeling like a child with problems was disposable. Besides, what happened to “wait upon the Lord?”

Moving from our first home (a ranch) to a second home (a colonial), someone actually asked us, “Did you win a lawsuit to buy this house?” Fortunately we burst out laughing and said, “No, we saved for it like everyone else.”

If someone says, “I feel like such a retard,” in the presence of one who is retarded, or in the company of parents who live with and daily care for a child (or adult child) with mental retardation, it is really hard to hear much after those words. If that comes out of your mouth, it’s really best to apologize, and then move on in the conversation. Don’t pretend we didn’t hear it – we did.

And now, the one you’ve all been waiting for – “God gave you this child because He knew you could handle it. I could never deal with what you are going through.” Hold us back! Honestly, we have never felt that we were special in any way. Ever! Like others in the situation of caring for a child with special needs, none of us are ever encouraged by that comment. We usually respond something like, “No, we’re not special. God just needed to teach us something we could only learn this way.”

Are you wondering what things might be good to say to those handling the challenges of a child or family member with special needs? Here are a few choices to consider:

 “I can’t imagine (unless you have a similar situation) what you must do on a daily basis. I appreciate (if you mean it) the heart of compassion I see in you. Your child is blessed to have such car.”
 “You seem to really have it together, but I imagine your life has many challenges. What do you do for yourself that you really enjoy? What does your child enjoy?”
 “Your child is beautiful (even if a child has a facial deformity, the parent thinks their child is beautiful…comment on something other than the deformity…the pretty eyes or curly hair, etc.)

Words of encouragement to the caregiver will be welcomed and appreciated. Thinking ahead to what you’ll say is better than blurting out the first thing that comes into your head. We will all make the mistake of saying something we wished we didn’t, but when we do, make the correction or apology, and know the caregiver will welcome the honesty!

Which Wolf Are You Feeding?

One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people.

“My son,” he said. “There is inside us all, a battle between two ‘wolves’. One is Evil. It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.

“The other wolf is Good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.”

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf wins?”

The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”

This Native American legend could easily represent the Christian struggle between the flesh and the spirit.

We feed the fleshly wolf by: dwelling on sinful thoughts; reading books, watching movies, or listening music that draw us toward unChristlike things; seeking close companionship with unGodly people; entertaining a spirit of ungratefulness; focusing on self and selfish desires.

We feed the spiritual wolf by: spending time in God’s word; fostering relationships with Godly people; having a rich prayer life; reading books, watching movies, and listening to music that encourage a Godly lifestyle; striving to keep our thoughts pure, focusing on others instead of ourselves; having a spirit of gratitude.

Which wolf are you feeding?

***

Denise Hunter is the nationally published author of bestsellers Sweetwater Gap and Surrender Bay. She has won The Holt Medallion Award, The Reader’s Choice Award, The Foreword Book of the Year Award, and was a RITA finalist.

In 1996, inspired by the death of her grandfather, Denise began her first book, writing while her children napped. Two years later it was published, and she’s been writing ever since. Her husband says he inspires all her romantic stories, but Denise insists a good imagination helps too!

When Denise isn’t writing she’s busy raising three heroes-in-the making with her husband.

You can learn more about Denise through her website www.DeniseHunterBooks.com or by joining her FaceBook group at www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=124248...

19th Chapter of Psalms

I believe the first verse in the 19th chapter of Psalms is a special one for writers as well as all of those who are creative like David in the Old Testament. The scripture reads, “The heavens declare the glory of God;…’ Even though there are many reasons to be a writer, hopefully proclaiming God’s glory is the primary motivation in what we do. Even though many of us write in different genres, by the very act of using our gift as He has instructed us, gives Him glory. Think of it. We’re making a glorious declaration along with all the heavens. We certainly are in good company as we declare His majesty.

The second part also has meaning for us as wordsmiths. It reads, “…and the firmament showeth his handywork.” I see this revealing a facet of God’s brilliant character. He is not only a God of mercy, love, and justice, but He is indeed an artistic Being as well. He made the lofty peaks, cuddly koala bears, lacy snow and iridescent feathers, the gossamer dress of an iris, sunsets of amethyst, and the entire vast cosmos. Enough magnificence to take our breath away daily. Taking a reflective and genuine notice of these wonders is like a supernatural embrace from the Designer Himself.

What an awesome reality to be made in the image of this imaginative and artistic God. And as Christians, we’ll have an intimate relationship with this boundlessly inventive and luminous God for all eternity. For those who are creative at heart like David, these truths can and should play a part in our daily motivation and inspiration!

“. . .The heavens declare the glory of God; and the firmament showeth his handywork.” Psalms: 19:1 (King James Version)

***

[image error]Bestselling and award-winning author, Anita Higman, has thirty books published (several coauthored) for adults and children. She’s been a Barnes & Noble “Author of the Month” for Houston and has a BA degree, combining speech communication, psychology, and art. Anita loves good movies, exotic teas, and brunch with her gal friends. Connect with Anita on her website: www.anitahigman.com

Thank You My Child

As a mom I find myself spending too much time nursing regrets. I wish I had done this or said that. Why did I do that? I wonder if I’ve screwed them up? I guess the reality of one daughter heading to college in ten months and another just one year later is really hitting me and the “worries” are running a muck. What’s a mom to do? You write a list for your child of some things you’re thankful for. It’s hard to worry when you’re relishing wonderful memories. And if you are like me and you have two precious daughters, you make one list and see if they can pick themselves out in each memory. Oh and one more challenge. I dare you to do this without at least tearing up. You probably won’t make it and that’s a really good thing.

1. Thank you for the memories of your sweet little head bobbing in the baby swing. You wouldn’t let us take you out. You preferred to nap there. And you looked absolutely adorable.

2. Thanks for peeking up over your crib with the biggest grin in town on your face when daddy came home. You made him feel special every night.

3. Thank you for giggles that made the worst day fade into nothingness.

4. Thanks for the many pictures you drew, just because you loved me.

5. Thank you saying outlandish things like “I’m allergic to numbers.” Those kind of statements gave your dad and I some of best laughs while facing a new parenting challenge.

6. Thanks for calling me to come pick you up when something bad was going on at the party. It made me realize you were really listening and internalizing what your dad and I were trying to teach you.

7. Thank you for rarely ever going to bed without saying “I love you guys!” You have no idea how important that is to hear.

8. Thanks for being such a generous person that even your home room teacher told me how much she appreciated the hand made valentines and little gifts you gave to the other students.

9. Thank you for stretching me as a mom and a woman. I’ve grown so much because of you.

10. Thanks for allowing me to mess up sometimes and not decide I’m a lost cause as a mom. I love you bunches and lots.

Near Misses

Near misses. Averted disasters. Life-altering circumstances that almost happened … but didn’t. Gifts of grace, they are, directly from the hand of a loving, caring Father. In fact, I heard about a hair-raising one not long ago from my friend Mary, a pastor’s wife.

On her way to Bible Study one overcast morning, Mary was sitting at an infinity light – you know, one of those interminably long traffic lights at which you grow two extra chins and a cauliflower bum before it finally changes. And when it eventually does turn green, it lasts just long enough for a VW Bug, a motorcycle, and a smart car to squeeze through. You’d swear the controller is a vengeful demon on a joystick.

Yep, infinity lights are one of Satan’s favorite chuck-your-religion-out-the-window tools. You’ve heard of infinity pools that appear to have no end? Same thing. Only instead of swimming in it, you drown in frustration.

So after many tedious red-green-yellow rotations, Mary had finally worked her way up to first-car-behind-the-white-line position. By that time, her patience had worn chiffon-thin. In an attempt to practice Philippians 4:8, “Fix your thoughts on what is true, honorable, and right …” rather than what was ugly, maddening, and teeth-grinding, Mary grabbed the Bible on the seat beside her and flipped it open.

Her blood pressure had just begun to normalize through the calming influence of Papa God’s Word, when a car horn blasted behind her. Glancing up, Mary realized that the light had turned green. As she replaced the Bible on the seat and began to shift her foot from the brake to the accelerator, the intersection directly in front of her suddenly exploded in an ear-splitting collision of metal on metal.

A speeding truck approaching from her right ran the red light, T-boning the car coming toward her. The car that moved when she should have. The car that was in the same location she would have been in if she’d pulled into the intersection nano-seconds earlier when the light first turned green … if she hadn’t been delayed by reading her Bible.

Shudder.

Okay, take a deep breath and leave the what-if-it-were-me scary imaginings behind for a moment.

That supernatural intervention story brings to mind a beloved old folk-spiritual song from my childhood. Do you remember this one? If so, sing along:

All night, all day.

Angels watching over me, my Lord.

All night, all day.

Angels watching over me.

By definition, grace is unmerited divine assistance. Undeserved favor. An act of kindness originating from God.

That morning, Mary was physically saved by grace. (She was already spiritually saved by grace, so if it had been her time and she had died in that accident, she knew she would have awakened in heaven.) There were many reasons why she should have hurt in that crash, but only one reason that she wasn’t: Unmerited divine assistance … an act of kindness from the hand of the Almighty.

Angels watching over me.

Grace is abundant in our everyday lives, whether we’re aware of it or not. The fact that we roll out of bed in the morning is purely a gift of grace. And that we keep breathing in and out all day. Grace. And have the opportunity to walk out, climb into our cars, and drive to the store where we have enough money to buy milk, eggs, and bread for our families.

Being able to do each of those things is a gift. Grace and more grace. Abundant grace. Amazing grace.

“Those who receive the abundance of grace and of the gift of righteousness will reign in life through the One, Jesus Christ,” (Romans 5:17, NASB).

So the next pond scum day when you feel like you’ve been picked out to be picked on, remember that through the crystal clear eyes of grace, Someone has your back.

Angels watching over me.

Meet the Pearl Girls: Debbie Coty

Meet Pearl Girl Debbie Coty! Debora M. Coty is a speaker, columnist, and award-winning author of hundreds of articles and ten books, including More Beauty, Less Beast and Too Blessed to be Stressed. Her newest book, Fear, Faith, and a Fistful of Chocolate, will debut in Feb, 2013. Debora, momma of two grown kids and Mimi to wee Blaine, lives and loves in central Florida with her longsuffering husband, Chuck, and desperately wicked pooch, Fenway. You can find her here online.

Please share a little about how you became a writer.

I’m a late bloomer; it took the fertilizer a few decades to kick in. I began writing professionally at age 45 when my youngest chick flew the coop and now, 9 years later, feel incredibly blessed to have over 120 articles published, a monthly newspaper column, and book #10 (Fear, Faith, and a Fistful of Chocolate) coming out in Feb.

Favorite Scripture or Life Verse?

“To Him who is able to do EXCEEDING ABUNDANTLY BEYOND all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us, to HIM be the glory … forever and ever. Amen.”

-Eph. 3:20, NAS (emphasis mine)

What motivates you to write for charity?

My writing has never been about money, or fame, or any of the things people sometimes think motivates writers. I began writing out of love and obedience to the Lord, and will continue to do as long as He keeps nudging me with a holy elbow jab to the ribs, regardless of the compensation.

Favorite Food:

Cadbury milk chocolate with almonds. Mmm.

If you were stuck on a deserted island, what are 5 things that you’d have to have with you?

My Bible

Cadbury milk chocolate with almonds

Cadbury milk chocolate with almonds

Cadbury milk chocolate with almonds

Cadbury milk chocolate with almonds

Thanksgiving — A Year ‘Round Affair

One late October morning, my husband and I began planning our family Thanksgiving. “This year, let’s do something different,” I said.

“How about having dinner at the cottage?” Charles suggested. “Of course it’ll mean more work.”

It was true our newly acquired mountain hideaway didn’t have all the conveniences of our city apartment––like a dishwasher and a reliable oven and a big table, but no problem, I mused, neither did the pilgrims.

“Let’s do it,” I said.

On Thanksgiving morning my husband and I arrived ahead of the rest of the family and set out a few surprises. We filled colored lunch bags with a variety of treats–chewing gum, nuts, raisins, coins, travel-sized toiletries, small toys for the younger ones, then tied them with bright string, and hung them from the log beams in the living room. We also attached a personal ‘thank you’ note to each one–expressing our love and gratitude.

When everyone gathered, we sat in a circle by the fire, sipped sparkling cider, talked and prayed and shared our potluck dinner and the surprise bags. Then each person, including the youngest, took a turn sharing the blessings they were grateful for. What a special and revealing time that was.

“It was truly a great day!” my husband mused thoughtfully as we packed the car the next morning. “I wish this feeling of gratitude and love could last all year.”

“It can,” I said. “We made this day special by simply choosing to. What’s to stop us from making every day just as special?”

It was then that we decided to make a point of keeping the spirit of Thanksgiving all year round. We weren’t exactly certain how we’d do it, but we wanted to try.

While driving home, we realized more clearly than ever that it wasn’t the food, or the fire, the games or the mountain cabin that had made Thanksgiving special. It was the people––each one so dear and unique.

As we talked on, we began recalling other people in our lives for whom we were thankful––many we hadn’t thought of or talked about in years. My fourth grade teacher whom I adored at the time, a favorite aunt I hadn’t seen in nearly thirty years, a man who had given my husband a job when he most needed one.

We were grateful to each one of these precious people–but did they know it? Or had we kept our feelings inside? Had we ever really said, “Thank you? You’re important to me.” Not often enough, we realized.

Some of these people are now long gone, but there were many more––alive and active in our lives at that moment. We realized it wasn’t too late to start right where we were. And so we decided then and there to phone more often, stop by and visit, tuck a note under a door, drop a card in the mail. It required so little.

One day Charles left a single rose at the doorstep of a neighbor––his “thank you” for bringing in our mail while we were away.

Another time we said ‘thank you’ by sharing a favorite recipe (including a sample!) with an elderly friend who lives alone.

While Charles was in real estate, he sent a “thank you” bouquet of flowers to the agent who sold his latest listing.

When he was in customer service at Nordstrom he often gave a small box of candy to clients who had become friends.

And when he received word that his former college roommate had a terminal illness, he phoned him in Guam to thank him for all he had meant to him during their years together.

One friend told me that she writes the words “thank you” under her signature line on her checks––a nice way to acknowledge organizations and individuals who serve her in some way.

Reaching out to others in these and other ways has not only opened us anew to the bounty in our own lives, but to the continuous bounty of God Himself, the one from whom all blessings flow.