Hieronymus Hawkes's Blog, page 5

How I Avoid Writing

And What I’m Doing About It, Sometimes

#writingcommunity #booksky #amwriting #writing Unfetterred Treacle

The Real Struggle

For me, the hardest part of writing isn’t the writing. It’s sitting down to do it. I can usually find twenty other things that suddenly feel urgent. Laundry, emails, the junk drawer I haven’t opened since the Obama administration. And once I do sit down, I’ll scroll Substack “for inspiration,” or watch Facebook reels until I forget what year it is. I’ve cut out video games (mostly,) but somehow, I still manage to lose two hours to nonsense that feels vaguely productive in the moment. And yet…this is the job. Butt in seat. That’s the whole deal.

Creative Avoidance Is a Superpower

I wish I had a glamorous excuse. Something dramatic, like a tortured creative spirit or a Victorian illness. But the truth is much dumber. The dishwasher needs to be emptied. I should check in on that thing I posted last night. Oh look, someone liked it. I have to reply to EVERYONE (but that’s also important to me.) Let’s go down that rabbit hole and pretend it’s networking. Oh, I haven’t read the paper yet. I have to print out the sudoku, and then complete it, duh.

I am a world-class creative avoider. A silver medalist in “just checking one thing.” A black belt in “I’ll write after I fold these towels.” If procrastination were an Olympic sport, I’d have a shelf of medals, assuming I ever got around to building the shelf.

The Internet Is a Trap (and You Know It)

The scary part is how easily the distractions masquerade as productivity. Reading Substack posts about writing feels like writing-adjacent activity. Same with industry articles, interviews with authors, or watching reels of someone else cleaning their kitchen while I think, “Ah yes, I too should clean my kitchen.” Suddenly it’s lunchtime. And I’ve written…nothing.

I used to lose hours to video games. Cutting those helped. But digital distractions mutate like viruses. Facebook reels stepped up to fill the void, and Substack, ironically, can be both muse and mirage.

Writing vs. Starting to Write

Here’s the weird part, I actually like writing (sometimes.) Once I’m in the chair, fingers on keys, document open, those first few words typed, I’m fine. It’s not always brilliant, but I never regret the time spent. It’s one of the few activities that I don’t feel like I should be doing something more useful. The other is spending time with friends or family.

The hardest part isn’t writing. It’s starting. Getting past all the other things that the internet has to offer, especially my new addiction (Substack,) is the hardest part.

There’s this narrow little canyon between intending to write and actually writing. And that ten-minute window between opening the doc and typing the first real word? That’s where hope goes to die. That’s where snacks are fetched, browsers are opened, and self-doubt throws a party.

I am getting a little better with self-doubt, but I’ve also been doing this for 17 years now. Wish I had more to show for that, but here we are (see procrastination mentioned earlier.)

What Helps (Sometimes)

I’ve tried different strategies. No fancy systems. No bullet journals. Just low-resistance tactics:

Opening my doc before I check email.I used a word counter calendar (for about 3 months, until I needed to edit instead of write.) That actually worked for my brain. I need to go back to using it.Setting a short word goal.Getting a limited few of the Prominent Procrastination Things (I really tried to find a P word for ‘Things’ but alas) done beforehand.

Sometimes they work. Sometimes they don’t. But when they do, it’s like tricking my brain into remembering I like this job.

The Ongoing Battle

There’s no silver bullet. No productivity hack that solves this forever. Just the choice to try again today. And tomorrow. And the day after that. One of my favorite sayings is, We All Make Choices.

Most days I win, even if it’s barely qualifying. Some days I lose to distraction. But I try to be kind to myself about it, because shame is just another form of resistance. What matters is showing up again, imperfectly and honestly.

So, if you’re also struggling to sit down and write, you’re not broken. You’re not lazy. You’re just human.

Put your butt in the seat. That’s the work. I’ll meet you there.

How to Actually Market Your Indie Book

Without Losing Your Mind

#writingcommunity #booksky #amwriting #writing Unfetterred Treacle

I have told a few of you that I planned to do this. Consider this the brain dump. A big one.

The most complete epic full launch calendar will be at the bottom if you want to skip all of this.

This post is built around what I’ve learned through publishing my books, running a restaurant, taking some lumps, and doing a lot of reading. It focuses on indie publishing, but traditional authors, don’t leave yet. Unless Oprah plucks your book from the pile, you’re going to be doing a lot of this yourself too.

Let’s get into it.

Marketing. Most of us never wanted to consider taking this on. We want to write stories, not run a small business. I was going to write a masterpiece that agents would clamor for, and the book would sell itself. Newsflash. Books don’t sell themselves. One of the things I learned when I owned a restaurant was that whatever business you think you are in, you are in the marketing business. Even if it’s just for your one lone novel.

Good news is you can market your book effectively without a massive PR budget or losing your creative spark. It just takes a smart strategy and the right tools. Which I will provide, or at least hint at.

Let me walk you through what I wish I’d known sooner. Grab a coffee. Let’s make this make sense.

Make sure you plan in enough time to get all the marketing things in the before it launches. Another thing that is free is putting a little blurb in the back of your book asking for the reader to post a review wherever you are selling your book. It is the kindest thing they can do, other than telling all their friends (or buying a billboard sign to scream about your book.)

Start Before You’re Ready

You don’t need a finished manuscript to start marketing. In fact, the best time to start is when you decide you’re going to publish.

Start building your online home, your website, your newsletter. You don’t need 10,000 followers. You just need a few people who are genuinely interested in what you’re doing.

Building the mailing list is a key to success for Indie authors. You can take that with you even if every social media site disappears. The best way I’ve found is using Bookfunnel, using a free giveaway. A short story or a previous novel or novelette that you give away in trade for their email address. Everything should siphon into your mailing list, whether that is your author site of any of the social media you happen to inhabit.

Add your book to Goodreads as soon as you have a title and a rough blurb. Slap a placeholder cover on there. Then, as you’re writing, post little updates—”I’m 25% through,” “Halfway there!” That stuff pops up in readers’ feeds. It’s free visibility.

And yes, pick a couple of social platforms that don’t make you want to scream. TikTok, Instagram, Threads, (Substack, hello) wherever you’re comfortable. The goal is consistency, but you don’t want to beat people over the head with your book. There will be time to pimp your book later. Right now you just want to connect.

Build Anticipation (Without Being Annoying)

We’re not shouting “BUY MY BOOK” into the void. We’re teasing, sharing, inviting.

We can’t all be Chuck Wendig or John Scalzi, but the best use of social media in my opinion (as of all of this is my opinion) is to just be cool, as my old roommate used to say. Be yourself, share things, add some humor if you are capable of that. But honesty goes a long way. You are not a salesman per se. Actually you are, but you are selling yourself, not your books. Not right away anyway. There is a time and place for that.

Start with ARC readers, people who’ll read your book before it launches.

Your “Street Team.”

I built a page on Facebook for my friends and followers that is a hopeful launch point for my street team. I give them all sorts of behind the scenes stuff. Early covers, regular updates, with the hope that they will help get the word out when the time comes. This could be your newsletter subscribers, a few close readers, or folks you recruit through sites like BookFunnel, NetGalley, or even Itsy Bitsy Book Bits. You’re not paying for reviews, you’re paying for reach. You need to be able to offer a free version of your book for this. If you are in KDP Select you can’t legally do this ( they have exclusive rights while you are in it), and if Amazon catches you, that book, and possibly you, will be blocked from Amazon. For an independent publisher that is a prison you want to avoid. Say what you want about Amazon, they still sell the most books, especially for self-published authors.

Keep in mind all of these promotion sites program months in advance so you will have to set this up at a minimum of 3 months out, safer earlier.

Cover reveals? Make those a celebration. Do a special email for your list, then share it on socials with a fun backstory or an embarrassing first draft of the design (trust me, we all have one). There are ways to do partial reveals as a teaser, with the buildup to the full reveal. Check out BookBrush for that.

If you’re doing Kickstarter? This is your window. Run it 2–3 months before launch. You can offer signed books, bonus stories, even name-a-character perks. This probably won’t work for traditionally published books. At least not until you already have it published. You might be able to do a special addition later.

And while you’re at it, don’t sleep on Goodreads giveaways. They still work. You will have to have your book listed there and an author login. Schedule one about a month before launch. The ebook giveaways are super easy to do.

BookBub has a Launch a New Release page now. Submit to their BookBub Ads, and the BookBub Featured Deal and hope they pick you. They also do a Preorder drive.

On top of the ones mentioned above, there a few widely known sites that are renown for doing reviews, Kirkus, BlueInk, and for self-pub authors Booklife, a subset of Publishers Weekly. Several of these have book prize contests as well. These are not cheap and I don’t really know if the ROI is great here, but if they love your book, it is a great blurb for your book sites and even your book cover.

Launch Week: Don’t Panic

This is when it all goes live, and yeah, it’s exciting and stressful and kind of like sending your kid to their first day of school.

Send out a launch email. Post on your channels. Do a big “It’s Here!” update. Keep it personal. Tell people what this book means to you. That’s way more effective than screaming “NEW BOOK OUT NOW!”

And yes use paid promos if you can swing it. Written Word. Fussy Librarian. They help. Book Bub ads, they are a little pricey but they are usually a very good Return on Investment (ROI.)

The best ROI that I have seen is Facebook and Amazon ads. Bryan Cohen taught me how to do Amazon ads. He is actually really good at it and his program is only $8. If your book is on Amazon and you want to actually sell of them you need to do ads. You have to, sorry. Unless you are famous. And maybe even then, so that it shows up in searches.

Also, don’t ghost your ARC team. Gently remind them to leave reviews if they liked the book. (No chasing, no guilt trips.)

Post-Launch: Keep the Engine Running

Here’s what no one tells you: launch week isn’t the finish line. It’s the starting gate.

Run a sale 30–60 days after launch—drop the price to 99¢ or even free, then stack a few promos. Try again for a BookBub Featured Deal. Do BookBub ads. Keep posting behind-the-scenes stuff, reader reactions, memes. Engage, don’t disappear.

Reviews are a big part of this, it doesn’t even really matter if they are great, I have 1-star reviews. I feel like they validate the experience. But 100 reviews seems to be the magic number that makes your book legit in a lot of people’s eyes. I worked very hard to get my first 100 on Amazon. Don’t be afraid to ask or remind people you gave the book to do a review, even if it just says, “I loved it!”

Oh, and if you’ve got an audiobook? Submit to Chirp. I used Findaway Voices, which is now owned by the same people that own Spotify. If goes everywhere that sells audiobooks. There is also ACX (Audible) and Author’s Republic.

I also use Books2Read for distribution, which will send it everywhere, ebook, print, and audiobook. https://books2read.com/faq/author/

It is the backside for Draft2Digital, which is owned by Smashwords now. It is a place to create your book outside of Amazon.

And please, start teasing your next project. Even if it’s just a mood board or a snippet. Keep the momentum going.

Tools That Made This Easier

Here are a few things that saved me from total chaos:

14-Day Author Ad Profit Challenge by Bryan CohenCanva (for graphics and teasers)BookFunnel (for ARC delivery and reader magnets)Kickstarter + BackerKit (for pre-orders and funding cool stuff)TikTok hashtags like #spacebooks, #scifibooks, #dystopianbooks Free Marketing for Books – curated resource list of free promo sites and strategies

Sources Worth Exploring

I didn’t figure this stuff out alone. I leaned on brilliant people and generous resources:

Bryan Cohen’s Best Page ForwardAlessandra Torre’s Goodreads strategyNJ Hogan and Raquel Delemos on TikTok marketingBookBub submission strategiesReview outreach via NetGalley, BookSirens, and Itsy Bitsy Book Bits

Want a copy of the full launch calendar? Drop me a comment or reply, I’m happy to share a printable version.

Until next time, keep writing. Keep connecting. And remember, it’s okay to be proud of your work and tell people about it.

And if you want to be part of my street team, there is a short test you have to take (not really) just let me know.

Independent Publishing Book Launch Master Calendar

(12–6 Months Before Launch): Foundation + Platform BuildFinalize manuscript and developmental edits.Define launch goals: sales, visibility, reviews, community.Build or update website (lead magnet + blog).Create or grow email list with reader magnet (via BookFunnel).Create/update Goodreads entry with placeholder coverStart engaging on social media platforms (TikTok, Instagram, Threads, BookTok, etc.)Soft launch Kickstarter page (if crowdfunding), gather feedbackBuild press/media list, begin outreach to bloggers and podcasters.(6–3 Months Before Launch): Early Promotions + KickstarterRun Kickstarter campaign (17–30 days); use BackerKit afterDesign Kickstarter rewards tiers: eBook, paperback, signed editions, character namingAdd blurbs, ISBN, and release date to GoodreadsPost writing status updates on Goodreads at 25%, 50%, 75%Set up ARC outreach: NetGalley, influencers, newsletter swapsCreate Goodreads Giveaway (~L-90)Apply for BookBub Featured Deal and submit multiple titles monthlyBook ads: Facebook, Amazon, BookBub CPM adsSet up your Bookfunnel, Netgalley, BookSirens, and Itsy Bitsy Book Bits reviews.(3–1 Months Before Launch): Build BuzzFinalize cover reveal — update Goodreads, run cover contestsSchedule blog tour + podcast interviewsShare excerpt or teaser chapters on blog & social media.Begin TikTok video series: book themes, character sketches, “if you liked X…” contentPost daily or weekly on BookTok with genre-specific hashtagsCreate and schedule email sequence: behind-the-scenes, sneak peeksSubmit print proof; order author copiesL-30 to Launch Day (Final Month): Hype + ExecutionDaily countdowns on social media (text, audio, visual)Host a virtual launch event via Zoom/Streamyard.Post Goodreads Event + invites, encourage reviews from ARC readersSend press release to local + online outlets.Post curated “non-promo” content using storytelling or humor on TikTok/InstagramRun final email push to list.Launch Week“It’s Live!” status update on all platforms.Like/respond to Goodreads reviews; avoid negative onesPost on Goodreads Event thread.Run Facebook and Amazon adsBegin paid newsletter promotions (Written Word, ENT, Robin Reads, etc.).Begin TikTok/BookTok response campaign with reactions, thank-yous, or reader shout-outs.Monitor sales and social traction.Post-Launch (1–6 Months): Sustain & GrowOpen BackerKit store for ongoing salesApply for additional BookBub deals (free/discounted books)Use TikTok for continued story-based or meme-driven contentRun multi-author giveaways or cross-promos.Submit to free promo sites (Indie Book Reviewer, Authors Den)Schedule book clubs, signings, workshopsTalk to your local bookstores about doing an eventStart pre-buzz for next book.

Sources & References

This master calendar was built using insights from a wide range of experienced authors, marketers, and industry resources. Many of these are freely available and worth checking out:

Kickstarter for Authors – Anthea Sharp’s Comprehensive Kickstarter Campaign Checklist Ashley Emma’s Book Launch & Marketing Checklist BookBub Marketing Examples – from the Ultimate Collection of Book Marketing Examples PDF 50 Ways to Market Your Book – Teresa Miller’s guide to creative and grassroots promotion (out of print) Free Marketing for Books – curated resource list of free promo sites and strategies Goodreads Marketing Plan – tips from Alessandra Torre’s Goodreads Release Plan and marketing workshop transcriptTikTok for Authors – tips gathered from NJ Hogan’s 20Booksto50K post and Raquel Delemos’ article on viral BookTok strategy How to Get More BookBub Deals – detailed strategic guide with submission tips, timing, and ROI considerations

These resources informed the structure, timing, and tactics shared in this post. I’ve curated them, distilled the best parts, and adapted them into a streamlined path you can follow without needing a marketing degree or unlimited time. Some of these are no longer available online.

So You’re Thinking About Publishing

A Cautionary Tale With Two Doors

#writingcommunity #booksky #amwriting #writing Unfetterred Treacle

I queried my first novel 86 times. Another book? 30 more tries. A few nibbles, no bites. Eventually, I realized the Big Five weren’t going to slide into my inbox with confetti and a book deal.

So I self-published Effacement. I hired an editor. I designed the cover myself (which, let’s be honest, deserves its own separate cautionary tale about first impressions and the tyranny of font choices). It worked out: 166 reviews and a 4.3 on Amazon, 454 ratings and a 4.2 on Goodreads. Not bad for a debut from a guy who once used ‘he ejaculated’ as a dialogue tag without irony.

That was enough to qualify me for the Science Fiction & Fantasy Writers Association based solely on indie sales. That felt like success. Real, earned, scrappy success.

Now, let’s talk about those two doors.

Traditional Publishing:
Yes, it’s still the gold star for many writers. But it’s also harder to break into than ever. Without an agent, you’re not even getting past the velvet rope at most major houses. And getting an agent? Picture an Olympic sport involving spreadsheets, soul-searching, and interpretive dance performed in rejection letters.

And if you do make it? You might get a small advance, broken up into neat little chunks: one when you sign, one when you turn in revisions, and one when the book hits shelves. No royalties until the advance earns out. And depending on your contract, you might get zero input on your cover, your title, or your marketing plan (which may or may not involve your dog and a ring light).

Self-Publishing:
You are the captain. The navigator. The over-caffeinated deckhand muttering about metadata. You control the timeline, the cover, the pricing. You also control the budget, the typos, and the existential crises at 3 a.m.

But the upside? You get to make the thing your way. You learn. You build. You connect directly with readers. There’s a certain joy in skipping the gatekeepers and finding the people who actually want your time-traveling haunted cookbook memoir.

What No One Tells You

Traditional success doesn’t always mean big money. Advances are shrinking. Midlist authors are often on their own for promo. You still need to hustle.

Indie success doesn’t mean overnight fame. It takes time, effort, and consistency. But if you do the work, you can build a solid audience. Yeah, Hugh Howey got a trad book deal and a tv series but he’s an outlier, not a roadmap.

Stigma around self-publishing has faded significantly in recent years, especially in sci-fi, fantasy, romance, and thriller. Some of the biggest names started (and stayed) indie.

So which is better?
Neither. Both. Depends on the story. Depends on you. What kind of writer are you? How much control do you want? How quickly do you want (or need) to publish?

Traditional publishing means fitting into someone else’s schedule. Self-publishing moves at the speed of your own caffeine tolerance and deadline panic.

But here’s the truth—there are no guarantees either way. No sure path to success, no magical formula. Just work, persistence, and a little bit of stubborn optimism.

So maybe the better question is what does success look like to you?
Is it money? A book deal and a launch party with a chocolate fountain and someone playing the theremin while reading your blurbs aloud? A glowing review from someone you admire? A quiet reputation for telling unforgettable stories?
Knowing that might help you decide which path is right for you.

Whatever road you take, just know this, you’re not alone. There’s no wrong door. Just different hallways. And if you wander through both for a while before finding where you belong? That’s okay too.

How about you? Have you braved the query trenches, launched your own indie release, or done a bit of both? I’d love to hear your experience, what worked, what didn’t, and what surprised you.

Drop it in the comments. Let’s compare hallway maps.

The Lies Writers Tell Themselves

#writingcommunity #booksky #amwriting #writing Unfetterred Treacle

“I’ll just write for five minutes.”

We’ve all said it. Possibly with a straight face. Possibly holding a mug that’s been reheated more times than your opening chapter.

It’s a lie. We know it’s a lie. But it’s a useful one.

Because here’s the truth: most of writing isn’t just writing. It’s starting to write. And that, my friend, is where the brain throws its most spectacular tantrums. Suddenly the floor needs sweeping. The dog needs a LinkedIn profile. You remember you’ve never fully understood the Mongol Empire and should probably look that up, right now.

But if you tell yourself, “Just five minutes,” the brain relaxes a little. Five minutes is harmless. Five minutes is doable. Five minutes is not the pressure of finishing Chapter Six or resolving an emotional arc or naming that minor character you’ve been dodging since page 12.

And then—surprise! You’re writing.

“I’ll fix it in the next draft.”

Ah yes, the all-purpose bandage we slap on narrative wounds. Did you just write a line of dialogue so wooden it could be firewood? That’s fine! You’ll fix it later.

This lie is a gift. It lets you keep going instead of obsessing over perfection. Will you fix it? Maybe. Will you forget it entirely and stumble on it six drafts from now and feel your soul leave your body? Also maybe. But hey, forward progress.

“This scene will be easy.”

Famous last words. You thought it was just a quick transition scene between plot beats, and suddenly your characters are having an existential crisis about whether they even want to storm the castle.

Still, this lie gets you into the chair. And sometimes it is easy…until it’s not. But that one moment where it flows like butter? Worth every trapdoor of self-delusion.

“I’ll stop once I hit 500 words.”

Sure you will. Right after you write just one more paragraph. And then maybe that cliffhanger line you were saving. And then maybe just rough out the next scene.

This one’s sneaky, because it often leads to unexpectedly productive sessions. It’s the literary equivalent of saying you’ll only watch one episode of a show and suddenly it’s 2am and you’ve learned Klingon.

Why These Lies Work:

Because they grease the gears. They give you permission to write badly, to keep going, to pretend you’re not overwhelmed. They let you sneak past resistance by dressing up in fake mustaches and saying, “Nothing to see here, just a harmless little writing session.”

And once you’re in, the magic happens.

Even if it started with a lie.

But these lies work because they get us moving.

Writing is momentum. You don’t have to feel ready. You just have to begin. Once you’re in, the words show up. Not always cleanly. Not always kindly. But they do.

The Counterproductive Writer Lies

(And Why to Kick Them Out of the Room)

“If it’s not perfect, it’s not worth writing.”

This one is poison dressed as ambition. Perfection is a trap. You can’t revise a blank page, but your inner critic will convince you that you should wait until the idea is fully formed. Meanwhile, your draft gathers dust.
Better lie: “I’ll write it badly now and clean it up later.”

“Real writers don’t struggle like this.”

Every writer struggles. Even the bestselling ones. Especially the ones who’ve been at it a long time. The process doesn’t get easier, it just changes.
Better truth: Struggle means you’re doing the work. You’re in it. That’s what makes you a writer.

“I should be writing faster.”

Productivity envy is real, especially if you’re watching other writers post word counts on social media. But speed ≠ skill, and faster doesn’t always mean better.
Better thought: I write at the pace that serves this story best. (Even if that pace includes long stares into the void and half a sleeve of cookies. Okay maybe the whole sleeve.)

“If I was any good, I wouldn’t need to revise this much.”

Spoiler: needing to revise is a sign that you know how to revise. If you see what’s wrong, that means your skills are growing.
Better reminder: Every revision is a sign I’m learning to tell the truth more clearly.

“This idea has probably already been done.”

Yes. And it’s waiting to be done by you. The unique combination of your voice, perspective, humor, and experience is the special sauce.
Better mantra: It hasn’t been told my way.

The Lies in Disguise

(They seem harmless, until they’re not)

“This time, I’ll keep my timeline organized.”
It starts with good intentions and a spreadsheet with six tabs. But halfway through the draft, your main character has eaten lunch three times on Tuesday, and no one remembers how old the dog is anymore.
Why it hurts: Overplanning the timeline can feel like progress, but often becomes an excuse to avoid the actual writing.
Better trick: Write the draft, mark timeline issues as you go, and fix it after the story exists.

“Research won’t be a rabbit hole this time.”

You googled “18th-century lock mechanisms” and two hours later you’re on a forum learning about antique hinge tension and considering a minor in metallurgy.

It’s not a lie. It’s…immersive worldbuilding.

Why it hurts: Research is vital, but it’s seductive. It feels like work but often hijacks momentum.
Better trick: Leave a [RESEARCH THIS LATER] note in the margin and keep writing. Google can wait. Your story can’t.

“I can’t write today. I’m not feeling inspired.”

This one feels so cozy and justified. But inspiration is flighty. The muse is lazy. The truth is, writing often comes because you start, not before.
Better plan: I’ll show up, and if inspiration wants to join me, she knows where to find me.

“I’ll remember that brilliant idea in the morning.”

No. You won’t.

Write. It. Down.
On your hand. In magic marker. In your Notes app. In smoke signals.
Whatever it takes. Capture the chaos.

The Real Trick

Sometimes the secret to writing isn’t motivation, it’s misdirection.
It’s fooling yourself into starting. And then staying.

Because five minutes is rarely just five minutes.
It’s the door cracking open.

And you, my friend, know exactly how to walk through it.

What Nobody Tells You About Revising

#writingcommunity #booksky #amwriting #writing Unfetterred Treacle

They tell you writing a novel is hard.

(News flash, it is!)

They don’t tell you revising it is like cleaning out a garage…only the garage is on fire, all the labels have fallen off the boxes, and also some raccoons have moved in and started a punk band.

Revision isn’t just “fixing typos.“
It’s often burning whole sections down, rewriting characters, and realizing your “perfect” first chapter belongs in the trash fire.
And then sometimes fishing it back out, washing it off, and duct-taping it into chapter eight.

You discover what the story was actually about.
You thought you were launching a ship full of badass space pirates.
Somewhere along the way, you ended up with a lifeboat full of orphans.
Surprise!

At some point, you will get absolutely sick of your own story.
You’ll hate your characters.
You’ll hate your prose.
You’ll question every decision that led you to this moment.
You’ll wonder if you’ve ever actually written a coherent sentence in your entire life.

This is normal.
(And no, you can’t set your laptop on fire. It’s expensive.)

You have to hurt your darlings.
Not just kill them, hurt them.
Cut scenes you loved.
Delete jokes you thought were hilarious.
Murder entire subplots you spent months building.
It’s brutal, but your story gets sharper, leaner, better.

Revision is about re-seeing the story, not just polishing it.
You’ll find yourself asking questions like:

Is this scene actually doing anything useful?Should I swap the genders?Should I switch from first person POV to third and add another POV character?Is this really the best way to tell this story?Can I make it punch harder?

…Or should I just delete the whole mess and claim it was an experimental haiku all along?

And the wild part? The magic happens here.
Drafting is exciting (sometimes).
But revision?
Revision is where the real book shows up.

This is the forge.
It’s sweaty, messy, loud, and it’s absolutely essential.

Nobody tells you that revision is harder than the first draft.
They also don’t tell you that your first draft was basically your brain’s drunk karaoke version of the real song.
Revision is where you finally figure out what tune you were trying to sing all along — and sometimes even surprise yourself.

First drafts are daydreams.
Revision is craft.
(Okay, sometimes the first draft needs some craft too — but that’s a rant for another day.)

Revision isn’t a test. It’s the road.

Turns out, the real plot twist was you getting better every time you picked up the pen.
(Or the keyboard. Or the crayon. No judgment here.)

The Residence: How Netflix Snuck a Visual Masterclass Into a Murder Mystery

Visual Storytelling at its Finest

The Residence Official Trailor

#writingcommunity #booksky #amwriting #writing Unfetterred Treacle

Have you ever watched something and felt like you could breathe in the storytelling? Like it wasn’t just happening on the screen. It was seeping into the room around you?
That’s exactly what happened to me with Netflix’s new show The Residence.

On the surface, it’s a murder mystery set inside the White House. But really?
It’s a full-on masterclass in visual storytelling. And honestly, it’s one of the most satisfying narrative experiences I’ve had in a long time.

The White House Isn’t Just a Setting, It’s a Character

One of the coolest things The Residence does is make the White House feel alive.
Every hallway, every servant’s passage, every grand state room, it’s all telling you something without a single line of dialogue.
Where a conversation happens matters just as much as what’s said. You can almost feel the weight of tradition pressing down in some rooms, or the slippery secrets hiding in others.

It’s the kind of environmental storytelling that sneaks up on you, where you’re absorbing more than you even realize.

Color and Light Do Half the Work (In the Best Way)

The show’s color palette shifts without ever slapping you in the face.
At first, things are warm, golden, inviting, but as the investigation deepens, everything starts cooling off. Blues, greens, and sickly fluorescents start creeping in, until you feel the tension in your bones, even before you know why.

Those Mid-Dialogue Cutaways? Absolute Genius

Another thing I adored was how the show cuts to other characters right in the middle of Cordelia’s (Uzo Aduba’s) dialogue. But it’s not random! Every cut gives you someone else’s perspective: a little flinch, a raised eyebrow, a silent judgment. It’s their version of events bleeding into the story, and sometimes not with words, but with glances and body language.

It makes the whole thing feel bigger and messier, and so much more human.

I’m usually wary of shows that mess around too much with timelines. It’s so easy to make it confusing just to seem clever. But The Residence nails it. The back-and-forth between the present-day congressional hearing and the flashbacks are so tightly woven that every shift pulls the story tighter.
You always know where you are emotionally, even if the facts are still fuzzy.
And when the two timelines start crashing into each other toward the end?
Chef’s kiss. Absolutely seamless.

The Congressional Hearing: The Secret MVP

Using the congressional hearing as the backbone of the story was such a smart move.
It gives everything this sense of gravity, like even the pettiest little slight or screw-up back then could have massive consequences now.
It turns what could have been a standard whodunit into something way sharper and more cutting.

Also? It’s Really, Really Funny

For a murder mystery, The Residence is surprisingly funny, but never in a way that cheapens the tension.
It doesn’t take itself too seriously, even though we are talking about a murder in the White House. The humor comes from sharp dialogue, sideways glances, awkward silences, and the kind of deadpan reactions that feel too real to be scripted.
Uzo Aduba in particular nails that balance. Cordelia is brilliant, awkward, blunt, and hilarious, often all in the same breath. And Capitol Police Chief Larry Dokes (Isiah Whitlock, Jr.) has some deadpan one-liners that are gold.

There are moments that made me laugh out loud, even as the tension was still thick in the air.
It’s not “joke-driven” humor. It’s character-driven humor, the kind that makes all the characters feel more alive and makes the gut-punch moments hit even harder.

So many moments of real humor that are perfect for each character.

I especially enjoyed the sidekick role FBI agent Edwin Park (Randall Park) plays. A perfect foil for Cordelia.

A Quick Shoutout to Paul William Davies

Also, can we take a second to appreciate the guy who built this whole thing?
Paul William Davies, who you might know from Scandal and For the People, is the creator and showrunner of The Residence.
The idea for the show apparently came after he watched a real C-SPAN hearing where a former White House Chief Usher described the inner workings of the residence.
Davies imagined the White House like a giant Clue board…and now I can’t see it any other way.

Fun fact: He wrote all eight episodes himself. Which explains why the tone and rhythm are so airtight; there’s this beautiful consistency throughout, even with the nonlinear structure and massive cast.

Also?
He made Cordelia a birdwatcher and worked with real birding experts to tie that into how she sees the world and solves the mystery.
Tiny touch. Massive payoff.

Why It All Hits So Hard

At the end of the day, The Residence works because it trusts you.
It knows you’ll notice the flickers, the glances, the shifts in light.
It lets the story breathe through you instead of yelling it at you.

It’s not just smart writing (though it is). It’s storytelling with depth, texture, and heart. The kind of thing that sticks to your ribs long after the credits roll.

If you haven’t watched it yet, I can’t recommend it enough.

What Happened When We Chased a Book Event to Cincinnati

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Last week, my wife and I took an overnight trip to Cincinnati. We love the Queen City, and we never need much of an excuse to go, but this time, we had a great one.

Jane Friedman was launching the updated edition of her book at the historic Mercantile Library.

Jane Friedman launching her “new” book at the Mercantile Library.

I say “new” in quotes because the book is a revised version of her excellent The Business of Being a Writer, which originally received a starred review from Library Journal and is widely used as a classroom text in writing and publishing degree programs.

But a lot has changed in the industry since it first came out. The rise of self-publishing, eBooks, and especially the explosion of social media, hello, BookTok, have reshaped the writing business in ways that few could’ve predicted. Jane wanted to refresh the book to reflect those shifts, and I’m so glad she did. (The new book releases on April 18th)

Also, I just really like Jane.

I started following her newsletter close to its debut nearly ten years ago, and I’ve been a fan ever since. She’s one of the most gracious, unassuming people you’ll ever meet, and yet she’s a total rock star in the publishing world. A respected industry veteran, she’s been guest faculty at creative writing programs across the country and has keynoted and taught workshops at hundreds of writing and publishing events around the globe.

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We had the chance to spend some time with her and her husband Mark after the event, and it was a truly lovely evening.

If you’re not familiar with Jane, she’s been the go-to authority on publishing industry news for over a decade. Her insight is always clear-eyed, practical, and generous, whether you’re traditionally published, indie, or somewhere in between.

The event itself was held at the Mercantile Library, a beautiful venue in downtown Cincinnati that regularly hosts top-name authors. I couldn’t help but imagine how cool it would be to do a reading in their stunning green room on the top floor.

If you’re curious about the space, here’s a little background:
Mercantile Library History

While we were in town, we also stopped at one of our favorite spots: Findlay Market. It’s Ohio’s oldest continuously operated public market, and the food options there are absolutely incredible. From specialty meats and cheeses to fresh produce and baked goods, the variety is flabbergasting. There are also some wonderful shops tucked around the perimeter. Every time we visit we find something new to love.

From there, we swung by Artichoke, a curated cookware boutique with serious culinary charm, then headed to the Cincinnati Art Museum. The museum features an impressive collection with a strong emphasis on the city’s contributions to American decorative arts. Cincinnati was once a hub for art pottery, silverware, and handcrafted furniture from the late 1700s through the mid-1900s, and the museum does a fantastic job showcasing that history.

After lunch, we wrapped up our trip with a visit to Joseph-Beth Booksellers, one of the most impressive independent bookstores in the region. (We were just a week too early to catch John Scalzi there. Next time!)

Needless to say, we can’t wait to return. Cincinnati never disappoints.

Hieronymus Hawkes’ Unified Theory of Fiction

#writingcommunity #booksky #amwriting #writing Unfetterred Treacle

Where:

Ch = Characters (depth × relatability × arc complexity)

Se = Setting (detail × immersion factor)

Pint = Internal Plot (emotional stakes × character growth)

Pext = External Plot (action × consequence × suspense)

Cf = Conflict (intensity × complexity × resolution satisfaction)

POV = Point of View clarity (consistency × engagement)

Pc = Pacing (balance × momentum)

St = Structure (cohesion × logical progression)

Tm = Theme resonance (universality × insightfulness)

Kf = Coefficient of Fiction (degree of imaginative freedom × suspension of disbelief)

How it works:

Multiply characters by internal plot (emotional story depth) and setting by external plot (immersive action and excitement).Add conflict because conflict always makes stories juicier.Divide by POV, pacing, and structure, because poor execution here weakens the entire formula!Multiply by the resonance of your theme and the crucial “Coefficient of Fiction,” your wildcard for stretching imagination (the higher, the merrier, within reason).

Example Usage:

If your novel has incredibly rich characters and powerful internal arcs, but is hampered by weak pacing or unclear POV, the formula will yield a lower overall “Story” score, reminding writers that the devil’s in the details and execution matters!

When Your Side Character Grabs the Wheel (and Drives Off With the Plot)

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I gave them three lines.
That’s it. Three perfectly reasonable lines of dialogue. One was even just “Huh.”

They were supposed to walk on, deliver some exposition, maybe smirk enigmatically, and then disappear back into the narrative ether from whence they came.

Instead, they lit a metaphorical cigarette, pulled up a chair they were never offered, and refused to leave. They renamed themselves something cooler. They got better lines. And then, God help me, they started getting fan mail from my beta readers.

Meanwhile, my protagonist, who I carefully designed with trauma, goals, and a three-act structure, is now sitting in the corner like a sad loaf of sourdough, wondering why nobody wants to hear their character arc anymore.

Ok, none of that actually happened, but you get the idea.

Writers don’t always like to admit this, but sometimes, the character who’s supposed to be a side dish ends up being the main course. They show up with more charisma, more voice, and more unhinged energy than anyone else on the page. They are chaos goblins wrapped in charm, and we love them for it.

Unfortunately, they also make your main character look like an unpaid intern.

You know the one. The morally gray engineer with a tragic past and a smug look. The best friend who was supposed to die in Act II but won’t stop stealing scenes with sarcastic wisdom and suspiciously well-timed monologues. Or the bartender who got one paragraph and now has a love triangle and a five-book arc.

Because side characters are free. They don’t have to carry the emotional weight of the plot.

They don’t need to be relatable or reliable. They just need to be interesting. They get the punchy lines, the wild quirks, the surprise knife in their boot. And they don’t have to worry about emotional growth unless it’s sexy, tragic, or both.

Main characters, on the other hand? They have responsibilities. They have to have arcs and backstory wounds and make decisions that aren’t completely terrible (unless your protagonist is an antihero.) They’re under constant scrutiny. They’re the narrative equivalent of the designated driver. Important? Yes. Fun? Not always.

So, what do you do about it? That depends. If your side character is simply upstaging your protagonist because they’re more dynamic…it might be time to do some work on your main character. Give them more agency. Let them be weird. Let them say the thing out loud that they’ve been bottling up since chapter one. Let them bleed a little.

But if your side character has grabbed the story like it owes them money and refuses to give it back…well, maybe that’s your story now. Sometimes the spotlight shifts for a reason.

Characters tell you what they want.

And sometimes what they want is your entire plot outline shredded and fed to a space goat while they monologue from a balcony with excellent lighting.

A Cautionary Tale (from Me)

One of my side characters, let’s call her Kasia (because that’s literally her name,) was supposed to be an occasional voice of opposition. A little spice. A complication.

She ended up being my favorite character in Effacement. She said the things the other characters wouldn’t. She was smart (smart-assed mostly) and funny and was hella fun to write.

I didn’t plan for her to take over. But when she did? I ended up giving some of her scenes to another character to tone her down a little. Still not sure that was the right call.

Funny thing is, I’m now planning another book, with Kasia as the protagonist.
She’s finally getting her turn in the spotlight.

There’s a very real possibility that someone else, some scrappy, unpredictable side character with too much charm and not enough boundaries, is going to waltz into her story and steal it right out from under her. Poetic justice? Maybe.

I like to imagine her reacting the same way I did:
With confusion, mild offense, and a grudging admiration.
Maybe even a little pride.

“So, this is what it feels like,” she’ll say, scowling while someone else delivers the killer line.
“Tough gig.”

We’ll see how she handles it.

What’s the Moral Here?

Side characters are like raccoons. Fascinating, chaotic, and not to be trusted around your carefully arranged garbage. But sometimes, they find something in the trash worth keeping.

Your main character is the meal. But that doesn’t mean the side dish gets to run for office. You’ll have to find the balance or make your protagonist more interesting or rewrite the whole damned thing. Easy right?

Have you ever had a character hijack your story? Did you fight it, or give in and rewrite everything? Let me know in the comments. And if you’re reading this, Kasia, you still owe me an ending.

Dear First Draft: It’s Not You, It’s Me (Okay, It’s You)

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Dear First Draft,

We need to talk.

No, don’t panic, this isn’t that kind of breakup. We’ve come a long way together. You were there when the idea first lit up my brain like a busted neon sign at 3 a.m. You were patient while I fumbled around in the dark, throwing words on the page like spaghetti at a wall. You didn’t judge me when I used the word just seventeen times in one paragraph. For that alone, I thank you.

But here’s the thing, you’re…a hot mess. What we have isn’t working.

You’re soggy in the middle, your dialogue sounds like a soap opera written by a sleep-deprived AI, and let’s be honest, you don’t get to the heart of the story for two hundred pages. Your pacing has the grace of a drunk three-legged llama.

And yet, I love you. Or at least I love what you represent.

You’re proof that I showed up. That I committed. That I fought through the blank page and said, “Cram it, inner critic.” You’re the ugly, glorious, necessary step between nothing and something.

But now it’s time.

Time to cut your overlong scenes and all those cliches and echo words. And so much telling instead of showing. All that backstory that we worked so hard on together. It really doesn’t all have to be in there. Time to kill that side character who added nothing but snarky one-liners and little else. Time to replace all those filter words that put distance between you and the reader. Time to get rid of all the descriptions of beautiful places we thought of together that have nothing to do with the story. You remember the ones.

And yes, it’s going to hurt. I’m going to curse your name. I’m going to wonder what I was thinking when I wrote that mixed-metaphor about hitting it out of the park before the ship sailed. But deep down, we both know this has to happen.

Because I want you to grow into your full potential.
I want you to be immersive. Tight. Unputdownable.
I want readers to love you the way I wanted to love you on page one.

So, thank you, First Draft. For being brave enough to be bad.
I’ll fix you now. (Or at least try)
And someday, we’ll look back on this and laugh.

(Probably.)

With deep affection,
Me