Petrina Binney's Blog, page 4
January 5, 2023
Book Review – Barmy by Victoria Wood
Book Review – Barmy by Victoria Wood
First published, 1987
I’ve always loved Victoria Wood, and in this collection of sketches, there’s plenty to make you smile. My favourites can be found among the several episodes of Acorn Antiques in this volume. A lovely selection, with some classic laughs and great characters. Victoria Wood had such a great ear for a turn of phrase and her timing was second to none. Of course, she’s much missed, I can’t think there are many writers or entertainers who’ve felt like family to so many of us, but at least we have her writing.
For the uninitiated, Acorn Antiques was a soap opera within a comedy show, rather in the style of Crossroads – wobbly sets, shocking storylines, and made to a tight schedule and budget. It was both night and day to its fans, but it was, in its way, comedy gold.
Here are a couple of my favourite scenes from the book:
‘Episode Seven
Film. Ext. Day. Village High Street. Small van labelled ‘Acorn Antiques’ pulls up in front of a shop bearing no resemblance to the one in the studio. The shop has been hastily and badly re-named ‘Acorn Antiques’, but the real name of the shop can be seen underneath. Miss Babs gets out of the van, holding an antique, goes over on her ankle as she steps down, and goes into the shop. Small group of interested onlookers nearby stare at the camera throughout.
Scene One. Shop as before. Babs selling an antique to our extras as before. She hands over a large paper bag (printed with ‘Acorn Antiques’) and some change.
Babs: And fifty-three change. Bye!
Extras leave. Phone rings.
Babs: Acorn Antiques, can I help you? Gainsborough’s Blue Boy? Yes, I think we have it in mauve, I’ll just check.
Flips over blank bits of paper.
Babs: Yes, we do; shall I pop it under the counter for you? Not at all, bye!
Puts phone down. Enter Mrs Overall with a tray of coffee.
Mrs Overall: Here’s your coffee, Miss Babs.
Babs: Thanks Mrs O, no poison this time I hope.
Mrs Overall: Yes, I’m sorry about that – attempting to murder you was just a silly way of trying to draw attention to myself. I shan’t need to do it again now you’ve bought me this lovely blouse.
Babs smiles absently and then sighs. Mrs Overall misses the cue, Babs sighs again, more obviously.
Mrs Overall: Why, whatever’s the matter, Miss Babs? Have you got an incurable disease, or is it just the sterilized milk?
Babs: I wish it were.
Mrs Overall: Then what on earth —
Babs: I won’t beat about the bush, Mrs O. Ever since Mr Kenneth left to become a follower of that weird religious sect, Acorn Antiques has been losing money. And this letter you were just asking about is to Dorcas and Hincaster.
Mrs Overall: The Manchesterford estate agents?
Babs: Yes. Pop it in the pillar box on the corner immediately, Mrs O – Acorn Antiques is going up for sale!
Mrs Overall goes out of the door.
Music.
Cut to film. Ext. Day. Street. Mrs Overall, now miraculously attired in coat and hat, comes out of the shop, walks to the post box, takes from the pocket of her coat an entirely different-looking letter, stares at it meaningfully and puts it back in her pocket. All this is watched by gawpers in distance.
p77-78, Acorn Antiques, Barmy by Victoria Wood
And then, there’s this absolute belter of stage direction:
‘Film. Ext, day. Hospital. Berta comes out, sees a crawling mini-cab, hails it and gets in.
Int. Back of cab. Berta is actually saying something like ‘I’ll just pretend to be saying something’.
Berta: (dubbed on later) Acorn Antiques, please.
p85, Acorn Antiques, Barmy by Victoria Wood
An absolute delight. Go. Read. Love
November 6, 2022
Book Review – The Favourite: The Life of Sarah Churchill and the History Behind the Major Motion Picture by Ophelia Field
Book Review – The Favourite: The Life of Sarah Churchill and the History Behind the Major Motion Picture by Ophelia Field
First published, 2002
Thoroughly researched, with surprising moments of humour, as well as some excellent images of life, love, politics and fury in the 1700s, I really enjoyed this biography.
I loved the film (with Olivia Colman, Rachel Weisz and Emma Stone, 2018. Go, watch, it’s a cracker) and was surprised that the suggestion of a romantic relationship between Queen Anne and Sarah Churchill was not a Hollywood affectation but might very well have basis in fact.
The difficulty in knowing exactly what sort of relationship Queen Anne had with Lady Marlborough, and indeed others, seems to stem from the word ‘passion’; something we would now, I think universally, understand to mean something of an intimate nature, but which, in actuality, can be taken to mean any overwhelming emotion; that the Queen spoke of her passion for Sarah in her letters could mean any number of things including close friendship. Which is not to erase lesbian history, with that terrible band-aid of “roommates” that seems so popular with some historians, but there’s nothing completely conclusive, nothing that negates the need for further explanation, in their surviving correspondence.
The fact that Sarah Churchill destroyed many of her letters, and left multiple versions of her memoirs, as well as a history filled to the brim with contemporaries who may well have struggled with the concept of an outspoken and influential woman, must have made this a difficult book to research, and I can only express my admiration for the author.
That said, I did become confused from time to time. Some of the key players have titles, ranks and even names which are remarkably similar and, coming from a rather spotty historical education, I got a bit lost on occasion. (I’m working on my education, hence the reading of this book.)
But there are some amazing stories here. One that struck me full in the face was as follows:
“Later Sarah provided refuge for another granddaughter, Bella, daughter of Mary Duchess of Montagu, who had been forced into an early marriage. The twenty-three-year-old 2nd Duke of Manchester had fallen passionately in love with her. He made a habit of locking himself in a room with two loaded pistols, saying he would kill himself if she refused to marry him. On one occasion he actually shot out his right eye, along with some of his skull, and on a second shot shattered his jaw. Next he tried to hang himself, at which point servants broke down the door and saved him. After all this, Bella was persuaded to accept him, though she never loved him and received a long line of suitors throughout her marriage.”
66% in, Chapter Twelve, A Dozen Heirs, The Favourite: The Life of Sarah Churchill and the History Behind the Major Motion Picture by Ophelia Field
I mean. Oof.
There was another scene, around the same point in the book in fact, which centred around the time when the Duke and Duchess of Bedford lost their first baby:
“… on the day of its birth. Remembering the loss of her own first-born, Sarah ordered that another baby – probably a servant’s – be laid beside the exhausted mother until she was more able to ‘hear the truth and be told it was only a Pretender.’”
66% in, Chapter Twelve, A Dozen Heirs, The Favourite: The Life of Sarah Churchill and the History Behind the Major Motion Picture by Ophelia Field
This behaviour is nigh-on incomprehensible to a modern reader, but I suspect this, among other psychologically dangerous advice was pretty normal at the time.
That the Queen dies round about the halfway point in the book surprised me, but even Sarah doesn’t make it to the end. The last chapter or so is dedicated to Sarah’s place in history and the many biographies and plays written about her, both in her time and in the 278 years since she died.
The notes section is expansive and, as with all books that contain a massive bibliography, I realise I have a lot more reading to do.
November 2, 2022
Book Review – Porcelain Soul by Andreea Lichi
Book Review – Porcelain Soul by Andreea Lichi
First published, 2020
English translation from 2022
“The thing is that, in the end, help comes from people who have had difficulties in life.”
p192, Chapter Thirty-Nine, Paving for the Future, Porcelain Soul by Andreea Lichi
When she was thirteen years old, dancer Andreea Lichi got into a car with a boy she didn’t know, and was involved in an accident that left her paralysed, traumatised, and looking to a future that included a huge amount of pain and hospitalisation.
After lots of treatment and plenty of special equipment, Andreea transfers from one hospital to another before finally being allowed home; but her world has changed. Everything must be done for her, her friends have largely disappeared, and the hopes she had for her future are out of reach.
But with her new circumstances, the author finds a new and exciting educational challenge and a path to better representation for disabled people in her native Romania, as a model for the brand, Atipic Beauty.
I think this author has managed to recapture her teenage voice well. There’s a sense of unfairness and devastation that runs right through the book, as well as more mature, philosophical musings on life and people, especially when faced with an emergency. Surprisingly, I enjoyed the mixture of past and present tense. I think it really helped to convey the confusion and ethereality of a medical emergency.
For this reader, Porcelain Soul is not a tale of hope in adversity, but rather a story of how, when it all goes horrifically wrong, you’re quite right to acknowledge it. I’m not much for true stories where everyone’s hopeful and optimistic right from the off. I’m sure those people exist but they’re not for me. I rather like a heroine who tells it like it is, even when it’s dreadful, and that is what you’ll find in this book.
I felt terribly sad for Andreea when, a good while after the accident, she found the online articles about it, and the way she was described by various anonymous commentators. After such a prolonged period of time in hospitals, with a number of doctors declaring her crying and screaming ‘fussiness’, it seemed too much for her to then find herself accused of thrill-seeking by strangers on the internet.
I read the English translation (I have no Romanian) from 2022, in paperback, through Scotland Street Press.
October 28, 2022
Book Review – 100 Most Infamous Criminals by Jo Durden Smith
Book Review – 100 Most Infamous Criminals by Jo Durden Smith
First published, 2007
Guess who’s researching for a book…
In this brilliantly concise guide, each of a hundred criminals gets a few pages explaining their background, their crimes, and the consequences of them. The book is only 281 pages long, according to Amazon, so there’s no flowery language or padding here. It’s just the facts, crisply written.
Of course, I agree entirely that we should spend more time on the victims of crimes and remember their names, not those of their monsters. Fact is, sometimes a name that’s sort of half familiar crops up in conversation, or in some pop culture reference on an animated show and you wonder why that’s ringing a bell.
This is the book for those situations. From Mafia men, to Bundy, Gacy, and Manson, to Sutcliffe, Jack the Ripper, Lord Lucan, and Harold Shipman, to less well-known but equally frightening people throughout history, this is an excellent reference, thoroughly researched and well written.
Book Review – Camp Carnage (Night Terrors Series, Book One) by Joshua Winning and Elliot Arthur Cross
Book Review – Camp Carnage (Night Terrors Series, Book One) by Joshua Winning and Elliot Arthur Cross
First published, 2014
A tongue in cheek horror, set in the mid-1980s, Camp Carnage follows the story, primarily, of Billy Collins. Sent by his terrified parents to a conversion camp for gay teens, Billy and his fellow campers are drilled in gender-specific pursuits. The girls are taught to be demure and spend time on their hair; the boys are taught to take the rubbish out and act all butch.
Naturally, there’s a mass murderer with a set of garden shears, lurking in the woods, and knocking off the campers and their counsellors one by one. But what is motivating the killer? And will anyone be left alive at the end to find out?
I was worried that there was going to be some sort of apology for, or attempt at justification of the conversion techniques used in the narrative, but luckily, they stand by themselves and they look ludicrous. Lots of humour in the dialogue, and a clever, Ryan Murphy-style, ‘present your gays to the audience and let the screaming begin’ type of story, I really enjoyed it.
And currently free as a bird on Kindle. Have at it, lovelies.
October 26, 2022
Book Review – You (You, Book One) by Caroline Kepnes
Book Review – You (You, book 1) by Caroline Kepnes
First published, 2014
I’ve got to say, I’ve been looking forward to the creepiness that is writing the next, and actual first line of this review.
How I love You.
Creeped out, yet?
When an unassuming young bookseller meets a beautiful aspiring author in his bookshop, so begins a cat and mouse romance. As much as Guinevere Beck believes she’s bought some books and had a nice little chat, what she doesn’t realise is that she’s given bookseller Joe Goldberg all he needs to find her online.
And Beck loves to go online. She posts regularly on Twitter and Facebook and, in no time at all, Joe knows where she’ll be at any given time, and how he can organise a coincidental meeting.
I think Joe is an amazing character. He’s so well-realised. I have seen the Netflix series, and for my money, the written Joe is grittier than TV Joe. Nothing against Penn Badgley – he’s an awesome actor and perfectly cast for the series. In my head, Joe doesn’t have such good skin. Maybe that’s what it is. Also, Elizabeth Lail, in the Netflix series – a total chef’s kiss of casting. Beck is rather shallow and not actually a particularly good person, but she’s so well played that you kind of only see what Joe sees.
Anyway, Joe is funny as holy hell. Standing in judgement, but with flowers, over Beck and her frankly ridiculous friends; he is irredeemably unsettling I suppose because it all comes from what he believes is love. Even as he plans how to isolate Beck, how to woo her, how to get rid of Peach, there’s a charm to him which is hard to ignore, and that too is deliciously concerning.
Brava.
October 18, 2022
Book Review – Book Of The Bitch by J. M. Evans and Kay White
Book Review – Book Of The Bitch by J.M. Evans and Kay White
First published, 1988
The edition I read was from 2015
Technically, for me, this falls somewhere between three and four stars, so I’ve rounded my rating up.
Now, I should qualify this right from the get-go. I live with a canine behaviourist, therefore, I have something of an advantage when it comes to all things dog because I can just call through any questions I have and, bish-bash-bosh, a good hour of explanations and a new to-be-read list.
In Book Of The Bitch, we dog owners can learn all there is to know about the health and hormonal issues which specifically affect the female of the canine species. From puberty to pregnancy and whelping, to diseases of the older dog, there is much to learn. And if that’s the stuff you’re looking for, then this is the classic.
That said, there is some wildly outdated information. Dominance theory, which is spoken of in some detail on pages 38-42 (Chapter Three, Educating Your Bitch, Leadership, etc.) has been debunked; for those who didn’t know, sorry to burst your bubble but you don’t make progress with a dog by bullying it into submission. Not only is this psychologically harmful to the dog, but it also makes for a pretty uncomfortable relationship between dog and owner – for the rest of their lives.
No one really wants their dog to be scared of them. But with positive reinforcement (not mentioned once in this guide), you can create a happy relationship with a well-mannered dog who’s delighted to be with you. I know there are people who think dominance still holds because it works, and quickly, too. Little bit of backstory for you, it was based on observations of wolves held in captivity in the 1940s and 50s. Modern dogs are not the same as wolves, even wolves from seventy to eighty years ago. I’d argue that if you scare the living daylights out of a person, they’ll probably do as you say, but they’ll despise you for it. You might counter that dogs aren’t as intelligent as people. You may be right. But they are as smart as dolphins. That might sound far-fetched but clicker training, which I think everyone has heard of, was first created for dolphins. Boom. Excellent piece of trivia for anyone gearing up for a pub quiz right there.
Other small details that could do with updating include the use of bean bags for the comfort of older bitches. There’s nothing specifically wrong with bean bags (bar the fact that if there was one within sniffing distance of my Jack Russell boy, it would be torn to pieces with beans all over the floor in moments) but, now that we live in a time of memory foam, there seems little point to bean bags for dogs.
One passage in particular caught my eye, with regard to rules in the family household. If you’re planning on getting a dog (in this passage, it really doesn’t matter if it’s a dog or a bitch), you’ll want every member of the household to agree to pre-approved rules for the dog’s behaviour. But this…
“Even before the pup comes home, establish some guidelines for her behaviour – is she allowed to sit on furniture, to go upstairs, etc.? Once the rules are made, stick by them and severely punish any member of the family who makes a variation of the rules in order to win favour with the bitch.”
P 39, House Rules, Chapter Three, Educating Your Bitch, Book of the Bitch by J. M. Evans and Kay White
Severely punish? Severely though?
Nope.
So, when it comes to the hormonal stuff and how to cope with pregnancy and whelping (the birthing of the pups), this is the guide. However, for my money, ignore everything about behavioural traits in this book. The world has changed.
September 20, 2022
Book Review – The Amazing Edie Eckhart (Book One) by Rosie Jones, Illustrated by Natalie Smillie
Book Review – The Amazing Edie Eckhart (Book One) by Rosie Jones, Illustrated by Natalie Smillie
First published, 2021
Written in diary format with awesome illustrations by Natalie Smillie, the story follows Edie – an eleven year old girl from Bridlington, Yorkshire, as she starts secondary school. Edie has cerebral palsy, a great family, a best friend called Oscar, and a positive, sunny disposition.
But life is far from simple when you move up to big school, and Edie finds herself under pressure to make new friends as her best and only since primary develops new interests and devotes himself to football and his shiny, new girlfriend.
When heavily pregnant form tutor, Mrs Adler suggests Edie audition for the school play, Edie gets the lead and decides to nab herself a boyfriend by Christmas. She negotiates her way through failed dates with boys who would be better as friends, eating sausage rolls, and learning her lines. Despite her oldest friendship falling by the wayside with a huge argument, Edie makes friends with set-designer, Flora, who becomes very important to her.
It’s such a happy book. Full of kindness and giggles, I am far from the target audience. I’m forty. I wasn’t reading it with or to a child. I was reading it for me. I really like Rosie Jones, and I can’t remember seeing any books with a disabled main character when I was a kid, and that would have been nice because my mother was in a wheelchair.
When I turned the last page, I felt both happy and sad. Happy for Edie because she’s on to a whole new adventure, but sad for me, because I’m going to miss her.
A fresh voice, full of thought and hope, I really enjoyed this book and will be looking to the next book in the series as soon as possible.
September 16, 2022
Book Review – A Far Cry From Kensington by Muriel Spark
Book Review – A Far Cry From Kensington by Muriel Spark
First published, 1988
I love Muriel Spark. Love her. And I’m rather annoyed with myself because I thought I’d already written this review but I’ve clearly been distracted by my own life – rather like Mrs. Hawkins in this delight of a short novel.
Mrs. Hawkins is a rather rotund, but comfortable with it, war widow, reminiscing about her life in publishing thirty years ago. The publishing house she works for is failing, and she lives in a boarding house with a bunch of colourful characters. As ever, Spark draws the extraordinary out of the seemingly ordinary, and the chaos brought about by an anonymous letter is the main pull of the narrative. That, and the entirely odious, manipulative, failed writer, Hector Bartlett, who has to rely on the connections of his paramour to get even a sniff of a book deal.
That Mrs. Hawkins refers to him, quite thoroughly and repeatedly, as a pisseur de copie (a hack), seems to bring her great entertainment and this reader wondered if perhaps, though her life is filled with friends and people who rely on her for advice (probably due to her size), her relationship to Hector Bartlett was one of the most important in her life.
Maybe that’s me reading too much into it. In any case, the prose is dazzling, the wit sublime, the characters are memorable, and the snapshot of 1950s London with which the reader is gifted, make for a truly delightful novel.
September 2, 2022
Book Review – The Midnight Man by Caroline Mitchell
Book Review – The Midnight Man by Caroline Mitchell
First published, 2021
Not long ago, finding myself with little to do in the afternoons, I started watching as many free films on Amazon Prime as I could get through. Among the many was The Midnight Man (2016) with Robert Englund and Lin Shaye. If you haven’t, and you like a bit of horror, I’d give it a go.
Fact is, having grown up in Britain, I don’t know that many urban legends. I’m sure they’re not all American, but I can’t think of any from the top of my head that aren’t. I suspect the story of the Midnight Man – where the impressionable young people enter a creepy old house, write their names on pieces of paper with a dab of their blood, knock on the door twenty-two times at midnight, and wait for the legend to come and eviscerate them if they fail to get their candle relit within ten seconds, and can only suppose that they’ll live to tell the tale if they make it to 3.33 am without major incident – is a well-known one. It must be because the Robert England film isn’t even the first one with that title.
So, when I picked up this book, I fancied I sort of knew the bones of the story anyway. And I did. The bit with the legend, anyway. And the story surrounding it is good, with very well-realised characters and a clever plot. What threw me was trying to work out the setting.
The spelling suggested the story must be set in Britain but there were a couple of American, or American-related, characters, and my frowning to work out where I was reading served to confuse this reader. As such, I’m knocking off a star. But only one.
