M.T. Sanders's Blog, page 14

Monty's guide for getting extra treats

There is one fing that is good about being poorly fellow doglet bruvvers and sistas but I need to say this quietly so the hoomans can't hear.....*whisbarks*....When the hoomans try to give you the tablets spit them all over the floor....move your head, shut your jaws together tight anyfink to make it hard for them nasty tablets to go in. You know what comes next don't you?...Yes them hoomans fink they're sooper clever by hiding them in the tastiest treat they can find. Then us stoopid doglets eat the lovely snack along wiv the stuff that's making us better.....Yep we're sooo stoopid us doglets hehe....Here's hooman slave dad preparing me next batch of lovely stuff to trick poor unsuspecting me.......

A poorly Monty

2018 hasn't started in the best way for Monty as he had another outbreak of ear infections over Christmas with a hotspot appearing on the side of his face just before the new year. He had a bad year last year with infections, hot spots and skin problems and I'm acutely aware from reading on our social media pages that many other dogs are going through very similar issues. We have bought what seems like an endless supply of remedies and treatments and I think eventually we will do some reviews on the products we've used and share some of our results. Meanwhile we are attempting to get this latest issue under control as he's feeling very sorryfor himself and the house isn't the same with the old Monty in residence .Just look at that face....

Lady stuff for Cookie bear

Well its that time again when I feel like a spangle at a Mensa event.....I'd love to take part but I'm totally incapable.....Yep the heffalump is having the lady stuff going on and I feel strangely attracted and repulsed at the same time........sniffing her bum makes me face go weird but I just can't help meself....I'd take a cold shower but even that's a problem when you don't like water....lodger anyone?

2018 you're very welcome

It's a very busy time at the moment as we head towards the new year. The plan was always to bring book number three out around spring 2018 and follow that up with a Christmas story around October 2018. The problem is I have four story ideas going and I'm not sure which one will be the next book. I have decided to continue to write all four and then see which one I favour and more importantly which one gets the thumbs up from the 'mini hoomans' that act as my first level of reviewers. Work is also continuing on the book with the FB statuses from day one back in 2011. I'm still not sure whether just to include all of the poems in this book or bring out a separate book with all of the 'wyming wendlesday' posts. I'm really looking forward to 2018, we have about 20 schools booked up already and a number of large events where we will be attending with Monty Cookie and the books.

A cwissymouse poem

So me luvvly hoomans I've writted a cwissymouse poem for everyone...enjoyIt’s a cwissymouse miracleIt was cwissymouse time but summat was wrongThe Robin in the garden had no festive songIt just sat on the fence with a sad licckle faceAnd its chirpy disposition had gone without traceWhen we went for our usual walk to the parkIt was hard to see anything cos it was so darkThe cwissymouse star was nowhere to be seenEveryone was confoosed what did all this meanI decided we needed an answer for sureSo me and the heffalump went out of the doorIt was a cwissymouse mystery we needed to untangleAnd when I looked behind, along came the spanglesI said all spread out and let's find out what's upWe needed some answers so I send out the pupsA little while later we all got back togetherBut some of the answers they wern't very cleverPoppy did know what she had to doBut got distactalated by a pile of fox pooBy the time she had rolled in and eaten her fillShe just couldn't move cos she felt rather illMolly started the quest with the best of intentionsBut there was summat when we met she just had to mentionShe'd done really well and got as far as the WirralBut then everything changed when she saw a....SQUIRRELBailey forgot what the task was aboutSo the information he brought back was basically nowtHe did say though he'd had fusses and treatsMy bruvver is not known for his intellectual featsWell the heffalump decided she'd speak to the birdBut word had got out and the Robin had heardIt attempted to fly but as it started to climbCookie shook madly and covered tweety in slimeSo no answers were there from the rest of my crewIt was up to me now, I had summat to doLuckily for me I didn't have to go farCos after half an hour walking I tripped over the starIt was sat in a field with no light given outI need to find out was this mystery was aboutI spoke to the star and asked why it was sadIt said cwissymouse was over....the whole world was badHoomans were unkind and love was all goneThe star had a point (well 5 actually) but I thought she was wrongI had to save cwissymouse there was only one wayI would prove there was goodness if I had my wayI came up with a plan it seemed a good one to meI’d show hoomans were kind and then the star it would seeSo I wrote a long poem and asked people to giveIt would help lots of others and the way that they liveThen summat great happened it was slowly at firstAnd I’ll admit at the beginning I’d feared the worstMoney came in and the total it grewThere are so many kind hoomans but that was summat I knewThen out of the darkness the star started to shineCos it realised then that so many hoomans were kindAs it got brighter it saw good deeds everywhereCos although it don’t seem it people really do careEvery day there is kindness if you look you will seeAnd the star shone so brightly cos it had to agreeThe darkness had gone (1 hit wonders) and cwissymouse was backSaving the day was becoming a bit of a knackThe only fing left was our red breasted fwendWe needed it chirpy for the sadness to endI was so very happy when I heard that bird singEven though it’s poor licckle body was stuck to its wingSo that is my tale take from it what you willBut I guess I’m saying there is plenty of good stillBe kind to each other and the goodness will growCos if you don’t that nosey star will soon knowHappy cwissymouse to all and to all a goodnight

Our charity target reached

Because of you lovely wonderful generous and kind hoomans we have reached our target of £1500 from our charity Cwissymouse poems. That mean that we will be able to give £500 each to three wonderful charities who are doing so much to change lives. We can't thank you enough but if you haven't donated yet and want to read this years new cwissymouse poem it's not too late cos we'll always have more. thank you again you are amazing.

Beware the reversing newfydoof

The heffalump has now perfected her cocking of the leg so well that it's hard to tell us apart....well apart from I'm bigger.....ooh and I wear a black collar and hers is purple.....I'm sure there's summat else but I can't fink just at the moment. Anyways she always trying to do number 1's where I like to post and she also tries to get higher. This has resulted in a foo accidents and yesterday's walk had another. She walked past a lampypost wiv hardly a sniff but I'm sure I could smell that lassie asbo that keeps barking at me so I pulled poobag across so I could make sure and leave him a message. Well blow me down wiv the flight aid of a bird but all of a sudden the hairy hippo reversed faster than a tory election promise and was suddenly sitting on me head. I kind of foolishly pushed so I could keep sniffing which only put her bizzyness end further down me back.....then all of a sudden she opened fire and there was a warm, drippy kind of feeling. When dad finally pulled her off me I sort of resembled a lightly marked burntknees mounting dog with a nice addition of yellow spreading across me back. I had to do the rest of the walk like that cos there wasn't a towel and later on the walk when dad was distractalated talking to another hooman the lady that walk past and stroked me spent the next few yards wiping and sniffing her hand. The moral of the story me odd licckle hoomans is that whilst eating yellow snow is a definite no no stroking a white black and yellow newfydoof is also pretty unpleasant.....Below is the culprit please be careful if you're out walking and see her....This newfydoof may reverse without warning.....

Charity poem booklet is raising funds

The charity Christmas poem booklet that this year will raise funds for Hounds for Heroes, Helping the Perrera Dogs and Shoulder to Soldier is currently standing at £890 with 17 days left to go. Fantastic generosity from all of our followers and we hope to raise even more before Christmas eve. Undoubtedly the pictures drawn by the children have added a lot to this years offering and we will be featuring them on here and the charity page every day now up until we finish. Don't forget if you want a copy of the booklet emailed then there is no minimum donation just click the link and it will take you straight there.To everyone who has donated so far a massive thank you but please keep sharing in your groups and pages.https://paypal.me/pools/c/7Zpia0EtIw What a lovely picture by Lauren showing Santa getting help from the dogs in a scene from the Night before Cwissymouse.