Kyle Belote's Blog, page 15

Checking In–Returning From a Dark Place

Since The Dark Portal went live on July 31st, my late mother’s birthday, I’ve been rather absent online. In fact, before that, I wasn’t present. The book was set for an auto-release. At a low point, I’ve deleted my Instagram accounts, my Facebook pages, and my personal Twitter account.

For those precious few who read my blog, I’ve been in a dark place, the darkest of my life. I won’t be getting into it here, at least, not now. I have a lot to say about it, but I’ll sum it up.

People are flawed and mistakes happen. It’s not right to render summary judgment based on one mistake. A favorite Bible quote comes to mind: “Ye without sin cast the first stone.” I rather like that saying, and I try to remember for my own life. Further, if you’ve stated or promised all along you want clear, concise communication, don’t walk back on it when it’s inconvenient. Pushing someone to their lowest point and abandoning them–when you put them there–is calloused, cowardly, and cruel.

That’s the gist. But more importantly, if you love someone in any capacity, you don’t treat them like shit. You don’t give up on them, and certainly not after you’re partially to blame.

I’m moving on. My sweet neighbor, Audrey, Saki–a friend of mine, and Tristan have reached out to me and lifted me up. There’s kindness in the world, I’m just not used to seeing it or being a recipient of it. The best revenge is to improve yourself, and that’s what I’m going to do.

On another note, I’m now in the self-editing stage of another book, a self-help for writers, but details are for another post.

The Dark Portal is Live

The Dark Portal novella is live on Amazon! Snag your copy today, ebook for $1.49 or paperback for $5.99. For those who have Kindle Unlimited, read it for free. See the back jacket blurb below.

“Honored delegates. The threat is real. I’ve encountered an alien, just one, and that was enough.”

Professor Darrovan Weiv, an alien theorist, always dreamed of making first contact. In an underground lair known as The Dome, he has the opportunity of a lifetime to learn the mysteries of the universe, but secrets have a cost, and the price for those answers may be more than he bargained for.

Find out what happens in this sci-fi horror novella.

Pre-sale The Dark Portal–Live July 31st

Mark your calendars, folks. The Dark Portal, a horror novella, has finally arrived. The book is on pre-sale on Amazon and goes live on July 31st. I’m really grateful for the opportunity to share this with everyone. Below is the back jacket blurb:

“Honored delegates. The threat is real. I’ve encountered an alien, just one, and that was enough.”

Professor Darrovan Weiv, an alien theorist, always dreamed of making first contact. In an underground lair known as The Dome, he has the opportunity of a lifetime to learn the mysteries of the universe, but secrets have a cost, and the price for those answers may be more than he bargained for.

Untitled

I am broken. Hollow. The things I’ve cared about most in the world have crumbled before my eyes and left me destitute. I’ve been despised, ostracized, abandoned, and punished by silence. I’m a boat adrift at sea, rudderless and without oars.

I agonize over every detail in my novels, how much more so for emails between coworkers, colleagues, family, friends, and those infinitesimal few who are closest to me? Do my words matter so little? Miscommunication: the difference between the intent of the sender and the interpretation of the receiver. Despite clarifying, I’m rebuffed with anger and shunned with silence, and that breaks my soul. The darkness of my downward spiral rushes up and smothers me, and they know it. It has become intentional.

I’ve been pushed to the brink, and now, I’m giving up. I’ve been the object of ridicule before, and it’s never bothered me, but to be so to those who hold a sliver of my heart is in anguish I can’t describe. It’s left me fractured to the core. While the world teeters between isolation and not, I’m alone. I live alone, have no acquaintances to call, no people to see, thousands of miles from the family I never hear from, might as well be a galaxy away from the people I count as significant.

Anger can drive you to do great and terrible things, but so can love; both have the power to destroy. My plea with you is to be careful of whom you destroy in anger; such things have lasting effects that echo throughout the lifetime of those around you.

Writing Update: The House of Lust and Candor

Well, now, it seems about that time for another writing update. As you know, The Dark Portal is with the editor for the first round of edits. We’ll see what she has to say reasonably soon, and then the second round will commence. The cover is ready, and after the editing phase, all we need is to copyright it, get it into the Kindle Create, make sure the alignment is in the proper format, and ready it for publication.

In other news, I’ve been working on another project that so far has gone unnamed. There’s a place within the story that’s important, the gods’ temple called The House of Lust and Candor, so that’s what I’ve been calling it in my head. And though important, I don’t feel it quite captures the essence of the story or is an apt title. I may feel differently after a few drafts, but so far, it serves the purpose. The premise is two bounty hunters commissioned by the House of Lust and Candor’s gods to track down the most hated man in the world, Rilod Afehl. There’s just one problem, everyone knows he’s dead.

I’ve had fun deep-diving into the two main characters. For anyone who’s ever read any of my works, you know I’m big into character-driven stories more than plot, though the Demon’s Fate is more plot-driven than anything else I’ve written to date. It might not stand alone after The Dark Portal is published.

I’m still waiting on Uncle Sam to dole out that tax return so I can start getting volume II edited. Seems like forever ago that I sent it off. If I don’t hear from them by August, I might have to redo it.

In the meantime, I’m also still plodding away with the book on writing. There’s a lot more to it than I initially thought would be in it. I wanted to take a streamlined approach with no frills or fillers, but I’m learning that as you talk about one section, it gives rise to another. Now, instead of focusing just on character development, I’m covering a slew of other useful topics like plotting, world-building, editing, critiquing, lessons learned, and the likes. We’ll see how it goes as the words take shape.

Alright, well, I’m off to make breakfast, then head back to the House of Lust and Candor.

 

If you enjoyed this content, check out my books, The Bearer of Secrets, The Demon’s Fate, and For Heathens of Heaven on Amazon. All works are available on Kindle Unlimited, eBook, and print. Reviews can be found on Goodreads and Amazon.

Pale Ghost

The sound draws me to the window, and through the blinds I peer out,

Down on the street below, a car has come to a stop.

Front bumper against the stone wall, but the traffic doesn’t halt,

A UPS driver get’s out, comes forward, steps timid with doubt.

 

From up above I wonder what could have caused this scene,

I pause for a moment, wondering if I should intervene.

The woman below fishes for her phone,

She’s calling someone, and now I know.

 

There’s more going than what I can see,

This isn’t some accident but a genuine emergency.

Scooping up keys to lock my tiny space,

I hurry from my corner knowing time is a race.

 

Crossing the street I see a group of six,

All cluttered around, motionless like twigs.

“Difficulty breathing,” I can hear them say,

I make it to the car and see what I may.

 

Reaching for his neck, I check for a pulse,

There’s none to be found in the pale ghost.

Adrenaline shoots through me and it’s time to act,

I grab hold of the man and pull him out fast.

 

I shout for someone standing to grab hold of his feet,

My hands under his shoulders, I give a great heave.

A voice on the phone is frantic, asking what I just said,

“There’s no God damn pulse,” as I settle the man’s head.

 

“Do you know CPR? I will guide you, alright?”

“Don’t stop, keep trying, until the ambulance arrives.”

The instructions come as I center on his chest,

And then I push the two inches as the instructions said.

 

Fast and vigorous, I try to save this man’s life,

But he doesn’t stir against the press of my might.

And then I feel it, giving way beyond my sight,

It vibrates through my hands, the ribs breaking outright.

 

A woman rushes up from the road, seeing our plight,

She’s an EMT, off duty, come to help in the fight.

Taking over in a moment where I stood aside,

She starts the compressions without missing a stride.

 

In a flash of light and noise the lifesavers came,

But in the end, they arrived much too late.

A hollowness crept inside me and overshadowed the day,

I stare at the faces who just stood in the way.

 

And that’ll haunt me forever, burns my chest with shame,

They all just stood around, wasting precious minutes to save.

Not one bothered to try until I came on scene,

But all were experts with advice, dignified and pristine.

 

That was the easy part, jumping into action,

The hardest comes after, wracked by guilt, the soul fractured.

In moments stilled I shook and trembled with shock,

My thoughts centered around the life that was lost.

 

The world would tilt, the vertigo hammering away,

My breathing thundered, frantic with dismay.

Fatigue washed over me, my mind racing in vain,

But in my hollow soul, I clutched to keep sane.

 

For a while, each time I had a moment to pause,

The reflections of those moments would come back to haunt.

Every time I closed my eyes, I could see that poor man’s face.

Even in my dreams, he’d come, denying peace or escape.

 

I’ve tried to talk about this, some helpful, others not,

Some think it’s a call for attention, as if I’d make that up!

Those closest to me have all shied away,

They don’t want to talk about it, the dialogue unpaid.

 

With the passing of time, the intensity has come to fade,

I’ve worked it out, alone, and in my own way.

The pale ghost still comes, every now and then,

And I can’t help but think what might’ve been.

Novella Coming Soon.

As Professor Hubert J Farnsworth used to say, “Good news, everyone!”

Well, the IRS seems content to not return my money in a timely manner, which is why we haven’t had any releases so far this year. But I’m moving ahead without them. 

So, good news to all your horror fans out there. My novella, The Dark Portal, is sitting on the editor’s desk, JC Wing (@writer_jcwing), as we speak. I’m excited to share it with you all. It’s a step in a direction I never thought I’d take, but I can’t wait to get it into your hands. It’s been quite the page turner for beta readers. And … we’ve got a cover to go with it!

In other news, I’ve decided to move forward with the idea of writing a book on writing, specifically how I approach it as a pantser, and how I create characters. I’ve been told by numerous people that my character creation method is unique, so, I want to deep dive that and share. Also, this book will have a hefty section on self-editing, so, I’m on pause right now when deciding how much and whether I want to push for the critiquing section on my blog. Stay tuned. 

The Demon’s Fate sequel is still shelved for the time being. It’s on the back burner, still simmering, which is better than other stuff that’s not even on the stove! I am fiddling with another idead for a story. I don’t have a name for it or anything. I’ve barely got the two MC’s fleshed, but they are named. Can’t wait to see where they take me.

Well, that’s all I’ve got this time.

If you enjoyed this content, check out my books, The Bearer of Secrets, The Demon’s Fate, and For Heathens of Heaven on Amazon. All works are available on Kindle Unlimited, eBook, and print. Reviews can be found on Goodreads and Amazon.

A Book on Writing?

            Well, in the past few weeks, I’ve been a busy and not-so-busy bee. Personal life is shifting, I’m getting affairs in order, refocusing on the things that matter as I slip further to the inevitable … retirement. That’s still a ways off, and I want to retire early, but I’m doing a lot of personal studying in this manner and self-help. Speaking of self-help…

            Someone I’ve been critiquing for a hot moment has been screaming at me to write a book on writing. So, I’ve been dabbling with the idea. Many folks I’ve reached out to about the subject have been either supportive or optimistically cautious. At one point, it was almost going to be co-authored with a friend of mine. The blog post I did on critiquing really spurred me to explore this idea. I’ve been fiddling with it ever since. I’m not saying to expect a book, but it seems likely at this point. And if I do, critiquing will make up a good chunk of it.  

            As with all my projects, writing the first-third is difficult for me. This news should come as no surprise, I’ve set aside the sequel for The Demon’s Fate at this time. However, some good in the bleakness, I managed to write a significant chunk before closing it out for the meantime. If I recall, the first 25k words are ‘in the books.’ 

            And lastly, I’m starting to eye going through Vol. IV for an editing round. If I do, I’ll be taking my time, as it’s still a few years from making it to the publishing point. 

            Well, that’s all I got this time…

If you enjoyed this content, check out my books, The Bearer of Secrets, The Demon’s Fate, and For Heathens of Heaven on Amazon. All works are available on Kindle Unlimited, eBook, and print. Reviews can be found on Goodreads and Amazon.

Critiquing: A Brief Overview.

Critiquing. It’s a sticking point for most authors across the board. Early on, most want to “defend their babies,” a natural reaction in the process. Later down the road, most just get used to it or grow a thick skin. But this got me thinking: why grow a thick skin? Why become desensitized to correction or guidance? If anything, we should be more receptive, not calloused. But sayings have origins, and I believe the evolution of such is because of how caustic people have become. 

After much deliberation–about half a year–I’ve decided to tackle the topic of critiquing. I’m sure I’ll have several posts, but how much detail is still undetermined. This isn’t all-encompassing and meant to be a guide rather than scripture or edict. This isn’t designed to supersede any guidance on any critique groups you may be a part of. This is a short overview. Gritty details will come later.

Writer Edict: Before I get too deep into this, here’s something for the writer: Make sure your chapter/writing is the absolute best of your abilities before submitting. Yes, this means rewritten multiple times, edited by yourself, and cleaned up to include proper alignment (justified), indentions, font (nothing crazy–use Garamond, Times, Palatino), etc. You, as the writer, want to make the best impression possible, as if submitting to a potential agent or publishing house. You want to win beta readers and future critique partners. Doling out garbage won’t endear you to anyone. Put forth the effort!

Now, on to the critiquers. 

1.    Know what you’re getting yourself into–By this, I mean, at least know a premise of the story and the target audience. Nine times out of ten, I pass on anything YA. This is a personal preference of mine, and I’ve got a long list as to why. There’s a difference between targeting an audience of teens and writing that just happens to fall into this category for lack of (insert long list here)–Brandon Sanderson comes to mind on the latter aspect. There are a few gems among the YA. Let’s not forget that JK Rowling redefined the YA genre when Harry Potter first came out. I’ve read them multiple times. But! To be real–JK’s last few books were anything but YA. They just fell into that category because she didn’t fully explore thematic elements or adult scenarios. Besides, how long are you going to ride on those laurels? If you want a shortlist of some of the reasons why I dislike YA, click here.

2.    If you set out to destroy dreams, you’re in the wrong–Let’s be frank for a moment: There are some real assholes on the internet. Ninety-nine percent wouldn’t have the gall to say in person what they type online. Anonymity emboldens them. So, too, is it with internet critiques. I’ve seen and heard about the worst. The following is something that was relayed to me by a critique partner. What part of the following is helpful?–God, your writing sucks, and there’s nothing I can do to fix this. You should stop writing!” That didn’t tell them anything except you’re an asshole. Not one bit of that helped the writing. Don’t be this person.

3.    Lack of meat in the feedback–I don’t know how many times I’ve read: “This is good. Neat. I liked it.” Much like the person trying to destroy dreams, how exactly does this help anyone? What part of this feedback can anyone specifically look at and go, “Ah, I see what they meant there; I should make a mental note in the future.” If you’re signing on to give a critique, give one with actual substance. What part of that made you like it? The prose? Character? Plot point?

4.    It’s okay to back away after your initial critique–Some groups have a word limit that someone has to critique. In one writing group I’m a part of, we don’t limit authors in what they can submit. We do, however, have a bare minimum requirement for critiquers, 2,000 words. However, for strangers on the internet, it is okay to back out. Once, I offered to critique someone’s writing. I gave them the full deal as I give anyone else. After the opening paragraph, I knew I was in for a slog. After half a page, I was hard-pressed to find anything positive to say. By the end of the page, I knew nothing productive would come of me continuing. As much as possible, I tried to remain neutral, or at the very least, free of overt negativity. I put a line at the bottom and said, “This isn’t my genre/target audience, and I’m uncomfortable with critiquing further based on my biased opinion.” This gives me an out, and it doesn’t destroy someone’s aspirations. Again, you’re not here to crush someone’s dreams but strengthen their writing. If you can’t productively do this, back out. 

5.    Give what you’d want to receive–Go into as much detail as you’d wish to back. I’ve given out critiques that I spent hours going through only to receive something that appears they read it in twenty minutes and added a few comments. If you can’t find something to critique on their writing, do so as a reader. Go the extra mile. If you aren’t receiving the feedback you need, either talk to your partner or find a new one. Remember that everyone is different, and their critique will reflect the type of reader they are.

I’m not saying a critique needs to be filled with sunshine and rainbows, they just need to be productive. Help a writer craft a better story, prose, character, whatever … don’t destroy their aspirations. I’ll have a post on how I go about providing critiques in the future. I hope this helps.

If you enjoyed this content, check out my books, The Bearer of Secrets, and The Demon’s Fate on Amazon. All works are available on Kindle Unlimited, eBook, and print. Reviews can be found on Goodreads and Amazon.

YA Sucks: Change My Mind.

This is an offshoot from another post I’m working on. I meant to clarify my reasons within the post, but it sort of carried the topic away and became about YA instead of critiquing. Stay tuned for that one.

So, here is a short list of why I dislike the genre. This isn’t all-encompassing. Yes, there are a few gems within the genre.

Authors typically write down to their audience as if they are dumb.Authors typically have terrible prose, or little effort is put into good writing. Here, art is sacrificed for angsty teen drama.Girl ALWAYS gets the guy and vice versa (Sarah J Maas) or unrealistic love triangle–Here’s looking at you Bella.  Cannot fully explore thematic elements due to age restriction.Low self-esteem POV from a character who thinks they are near-worthless, yet somehow secretly beautiful and they just can’t see it.Unrealistic objectification upon person, place, or thing. Unrealistic outlook on life.Straw-man plot that can easily negate the entire book by two characters just talking.Cheesy, badly written romance. Superficial, unrealistic friendships with little to no depth.Constantly blurring the lines between YA and adult audience–which is a disgrace. If you want to write sex, write for an adult audience. Generally happy endings.Lastly, I’ve already lived the teen life: I was dumb–truly moronic in my limited capacity to think and see who life really worked; I hated the world, my life, and my parents; I was awkward, and full of piss and vinegar. Why would I want to relive that segment of my life repeatedly? Why should I let those few awkward years define me? Why do I want to perpetuate my misery by allowing myself to be sucked into a novel with a protagonist half my current age? I’ve done it, don’t need to slog through it again. I digress…

Well, that is a very short and shallow list of why I dislike the genre. Maybe one day I will go through it again and more in depth, but I doubt it. I’m not one to waste time on a lost cause. Until next time.

If you enjoyed this content, check out my books, The Bearer of Secrets, and The Demon’s Fate on Amazon. All works are available on Kindle Unlimited, eBook, and print. Reviews can be found on Goodreads and Amazon.