Bill Conrad's Blog - Posts Tagged "grammar"
My Eternal Struggle With Grammar
Wikipedia defines grammar as: The set of structural rules governing the composition of clauses, phrases, and words in any given natural language. The term refers also to the study of such rules, and this field includes phonology, morphology, and syntax, often complemented by phonetics, semantics, and pragmatics. A lot of wisdom in those words.
I define grammar as a complete pain. It’s not that I am against the use of grammar or have some objects to the rules that have been set up. I’m lucky to speak a language that indeed does have so many well-defined rules. My issue is that the iron clad rules of grammar are less iron and more rust.
Where did these grammar rules come from? Long ago, people started speaking. They didn’t have rules; they just spoke. Later on when the rules were written to give the language some consistency. In order to do this, the rules had to have many exceptions and not every instance is covered by a rule. For example, we have the basic spelling rule, "I before E, except after C." And yes, I know. This is technically a mnemonic and not a “rule.”
Today, we get these rules from various sources. For writers, the gold standard is The Chicago Manual of Style which proudly proclaims it is “the venerable, time-tested guide to style, usage, and grammar.” There are other modern sources like “The PC is not a typewriter” and one that I occasionally use “Grammarly Handbook.” The problem I have is when the “experts” don’t agree or they have no opinion.
I will be the first to admit that my grammar is at best, OK. [Example side note. Is it: ok, Ok, OK or okay?] The good news for me is that there are excellent editors and they are really good at cleaning up my work. But what happens when the editors disagree with each other? Often their answer is: “What you’re asking doesn’t matter that much. Either way is fine.” In the end, I do my best to be consistent.
Here is an easy one. How do you write numbers in a sentence?
There are 52 playing cards.
There are fifty-two playing cards.
There are fifty two playing cards.
This should be easy. Pick one of the three and go with it. The Chicago Manual of Style states that for under 100, one should write out the numbers and use a dash. “There are fifty-two playing cards.” For numbers over 100, one should write in numerals. “There are 152 playing cards.” Other sources dictate that it should always be one or the other and not both. Another source says that you should use written out words inside of the quotes and numerals outside. Another source says that for non-technical books, the words should be written out and technical books should exclusively use numerals.
For me, I don’t care. I just want to be consistent and so, I made up a new rule. For numbers over 5, I use numerals unless it is at the beginning of a sentence. This rule seems to make my writings read a bit better. However, I know that my personal made up rule is not even close to the gold standard.
Let’s look at a complex example: ?!
What’s your problem?!
What’s your problem? !
What’s your problem!?
What’s your problem!
WHAT’S YOUR PROBLEM?
In this sentence, somebody is yelling out a question. This yelling is expressed with a “!” My dilemma is: What’s the proper way to use punctuation in this instance? This isn’t clear. The Chicago Manual of Style has no specific rule to cover this issue. Even the Internet [Should Internet be capitalized? Some say yes, others no. Another confusion.] has many discussions on this issue that generally result in disagreement. For my writing, I decided to go with “?!” as the Internet discussions suggests that “?!” is the most appropriate usage. My opinion is that “?” trumps the emphasis “!”, but the emphasis “!” is still required. I also don’t like WRITING IN CAPITOL LETTERS.
What an impossible example? “There are three two’s in the English language.” That’s a perfectly valid sentence, but it is impossible to actually write. Should we make up a fourth two? Call it “tu” “There are four tu’s in the English language.”
There is another overall issue with grammar and this comes down to “writing style.” While this is technically not grammar, I am just going to call it grammar. For example, the dialog for a play/movie/book might have random grammar. This is because the person who is “speaking” just talks that way. This gives the impression that the character is uneducated. A technical or legal document would have terse sentences that don’t make much sense. A poetic or dramatic work has flowy words without punctuation. Why are all these different with regards to grammar? I would prefer that clear rules apply without exception to all forms of writing.
I find that some particular people are complete stickers for the rules. I also find that these same people never seem to have anything nice to say about my writings. They cannot get over their own grammar safeguards enough to enjoy my written thoughts. For me, this issue has been present since my dawn of my writing. On a side note, I nearly flunked my college Psychology class due to this issue.
On a personal note, I find that the writings from the grammar stickers is at best bland. They go out of their way to use direct “flowerily” sentences with “big words.” IE words that are not in common use. As a result, I have to keep asking questions to get them to tell me what is really going on. This is especially troubling in Engineering when I just need the facts and not “big words” loaded with endless punctuation.
Another issue I have with grammar stickers is that their writings begins to look like a legal document. Every other word has a coma or semicolon after it and it seems to be a contest to see how long a sentence can actually be. Reading one of these “correct sentences” out loud is like reading with a mouth full of rocks on an empty stomach. My college roommate referred to this as “dieseling” from when you turned off your carbureted car and it would still run.
The comma is intended to give the reader a chance to breath and should be used with moderation. The period is there to separate thoughts and give the mind a break. The use of normal words helps get the point across quickly. That same psychology teacher that tried to flunk me loved to use the word “Cynosure.” [Definition: A focal point of admiration] Valid word? Yes. Did anybody in the class know what the word meant? No. Was it an attempt to make that teacher seem important? Defiantly!!!
Where does that leave me? I have an overall goal in my writings with regard to my grammar. I try really hard to check my grammar and I do my best to make it consistent. Before I release something to my editor or on my blog, I go over it several times. When I send my works off to an editor and they work overtime to clean my messy material up. I accept all their changes without question. I look over what they corrected and try to duplicate their changes on my next work. That’s the best I can do.
I wish there was a better solution for me. The real problem not having a single gold rule to follow. Also, what happens when the software grammar checkers and editors disagree? In other languages, there is a board or governing body that settles these questions. The English language has no governing body. In 1906, the Simplified Spelling Board was created to reform the spelling of the English language, making it simpler and easier to learn, and eliminated many inconsistencies. The board operated until 1920, the year after the death of its founding benefactor, Andrew Carnegie who had come to criticize the progress and approach of the organization.
I believe the Simplified Spelling Board or something like it should be resurrected. Perhaps a Wikipedia version of the The Chicago Manual of Style. Let’s pretend this is true for a moment. They met, had a discussion on the “?!” issue and determined the conclusion: As of 2017, the correct way to emphasize a question is “?!” No other format shall be tolerated. This rule would then be incorporated into textbooks and software grammar checkers. The results will be that the grammar monsters have less to complain about and all writing would be consistent
Now if there is one thing I really hate is a rant that offers no solution. So, everybody. Let’s set up some sort of governing board and then accept their words of wisdom. One a side note. Please buy my book!!! It’s a good book and so far, without exception, everybody that read it, enjoyed it. I’m going crazy without any sales.
You’re the best -Bill
October, 24, 2017
I define grammar as a complete pain. It’s not that I am against the use of grammar or have some objects to the rules that have been set up. I’m lucky to speak a language that indeed does have so many well-defined rules. My issue is that the iron clad rules of grammar are less iron and more rust.
Where did these grammar rules come from? Long ago, people started speaking. They didn’t have rules; they just spoke. Later on when the rules were written to give the language some consistency. In order to do this, the rules had to have many exceptions and not every instance is covered by a rule. For example, we have the basic spelling rule, "I before E, except after C." And yes, I know. This is technically a mnemonic and not a “rule.”
Today, we get these rules from various sources. For writers, the gold standard is The Chicago Manual of Style which proudly proclaims it is “the venerable, time-tested guide to style, usage, and grammar.” There are other modern sources like “The PC is not a typewriter” and one that I occasionally use “Grammarly Handbook.” The problem I have is when the “experts” don’t agree or they have no opinion.
I will be the first to admit that my grammar is at best, OK. [Example side note. Is it: ok, Ok, OK or okay?] The good news for me is that there are excellent editors and they are really good at cleaning up my work. But what happens when the editors disagree with each other? Often their answer is: “What you’re asking doesn’t matter that much. Either way is fine.” In the end, I do my best to be consistent.
Here is an easy one. How do you write numbers in a sentence?
There are 52 playing cards.
There are fifty-two playing cards.
There are fifty two playing cards.
This should be easy. Pick one of the three and go with it. The Chicago Manual of Style states that for under 100, one should write out the numbers and use a dash. “There are fifty-two playing cards.” For numbers over 100, one should write in numerals. “There are 152 playing cards.” Other sources dictate that it should always be one or the other and not both. Another source says that you should use written out words inside of the quotes and numerals outside. Another source says that for non-technical books, the words should be written out and technical books should exclusively use numerals.
For me, I don’t care. I just want to be consistent and so, I made up a new rule. For numbers over 5, I use numerals unless it is at the beginning of a sentence. This rule seems to make my writings read a bit better. However, I know that my personal made up rule is not even close to the gold standard.
Let’s look at a complex example: ?!
What’s your problem?!
What’s your problem? !
What’s your problem!?
What’s your problem!
WHAT’S YOUR PROBLEM?
In this sentence, somebody is yelling out a question. This yelling is expressed with a “!” My dilemma is: What’s the proper way to use punctuation in this instance? This isn’t clear. The Chicago Manual of Style has no specific rule to cover this issue. Even the Internet [Should Internet be capitalized? Some say yes, others no. Another confusion.] has many discussions on this issue that generally result in disagreement. For my writing, I decided to go with “?!” as the Internet discussions suggests that “?!” is the most appropriate usage. My opinion is that “?” trumps the emphasis “!”, but the emphasis “!” is still required. I also don’t like WRITING IN CAPITOL LETTERS.
What an impossible example? “There are three two’s in the English language.” That’s a perfectly valid sentence, but it is impossible to actually write. Should we make up a fourth two? Call it “tu” “There are four tu’s in the English language.”
There is another overall issue with grammar and this comes down to “writing style.” While this is technically not grammar, I am just going to call it grammar. For example, the dialog for a play/movie/book might have random grammar. This is because the person who is “speaking” just talks that way. This gives the impression that the character is uneducated. A technical or legal document would have terse sentences that don’t make much sense. A poetic or dramatic work has flowy words without punctuation. Why are all these different with regards to grammar? I would prefer that clear rules apply without exception to all forms of writing.
I find that some particular people are complete stickers for the rules. I also find that these same people never seem to have anything nice to say about my writings. They cannot get over their own grammar safeguards enough to enjoy my written thoughts. For me, this issue has been present since my dawn of my writing. On a side note, I nearly flunked my college Psychology class due to this issue.
On a personal note, I find that the writings from the grammar stickers is at best bland. They go out of their way to use direct “flowerily” sentences with “big words.” IE words that are not in common use. As a result, I have to keep asking questions to get them to tell me what is really going on. This is especially troubling in Engineering when I just need the facts and not “big words” loaded with endless punctuation.
Another issue I have with grammar stickers is that their writings begins to look like a legal document. Every other word has a coma or semicolon after it and it seems to be a contest to see how long a sentence can actually be. Reading one of these “correct sentences” out loud is like reading with a mouth full of rocks on an empty stomach. My college roommate referred to this as “dieseling” from when you turned off your carbureted car and it would still run.
The comma is intended to give the reader a chance to breath and should be used with moderation. The period is there to separate thoughts and give the mind a break. The use of normal words helps get the point across quickly. That same psychology teacher that tried to flunk me loved to use the word “Cynosure.” [Definition: A focal point of admiration] Valid word? Yes. Did anybody in the class know what the word meant? No. Was it an attempt to make that teacher seem important? Defiantly!!!
Where does that leave me? I have an overall goal in my writings with regard to my grammar. I try really hard to check my grammar and I do my best to make it consistent. Before I release something to my editor or on my blog, I go over it several times. When I send my works off to an editor and they work overtime to clean my messy material up. I accept all their changes without question. I look over what they corrected and try to duplicate their changes on my next work. That’s the best I can do.
I wish there was a better solution for me. The real problem not having a single gold rule to follow. Also, what happens when the software grammar checkers and editors disagree? In other languages, there is a board or governing body that settles these questions. The English language has no governing body. In 1906, the Simplified Spelling Board was created to reform the spelling of the English language, making it simpler and easier to learn, and eliminated many inconsistencies. The board operated until 1920, the year after the death of its founding benefactor, Andrew Carnegie who had come to criticize the progress and approach of the organization.
I believe the Simplified Spelling Board or something like it should be resurrected. Perhaps a Wikipedia version of the The Chicago Manual of Style. Let’s pretend this is true for a moment. They met, had a discussion on the “?!” issue and determined the conclusion: As of 2017, the correct way to emphasize a question is “?!” No other format shall be tolerated. This rule would then be incorporated into textbooks and software grammar checkers. The results will be that the grammar monsters have less to complain about and all writing would be consistent
Now if there is one thing I really hate is a rant that offers no solution. So, everybody. Let’s set up some sort of governing board and then accept their words of wisdom. One a side note. Please buy my book!!! It’s a good book and so far, without exception, everybody that read it, enjoyed it. I’m going crazy without any sales.
You’re the best -Bill
October, 24, 2017
My Eternal Struggle With Grammar Continues
Sorry, it has taken so long to write another blog. Life gets busy. The good news is that my second and third book are in the editing/publishing process. Yay! The bad news is that my eternal struggle with grammar continues. When I last wrote about my struggle, I was trying to overcome the perils of the coma and the quotation mark. On the coma, I still haven’t completely figured where they should go. Lots of different opinions in this matter. I understand most the logic behind where to properly place them. The problem is that using them correctly makes my sentences read awkwardly. In that area, I still do my best, but my editor has to make many changes.
With quotation marks, I still follow the same format. Bob said in a deep voice, “Do this.” Often, I read in other books: “Do this.” Said Bob in a deep voice. I find that style confusing as I want to know who is speaking. To me, this reads like the lights are off and somebody starts talking in a monotone voice. When they stop talking, the lights turn on and it is revealed to be the main character. Then your brain puts it all together and you fill in the fact that the main character HAD a deep voice. Somewhere there is a smart reader thinking, “I knew it all along.” While the rest of us are thinking, “Ahh, now that makes sense.”
I have added a new wrinkle to the quotation mark mystery. My characters in one story are telepathic. I decided not to use quotation marks. Bob thought to Jane, There are no formal rules about telepathic thoughts because there is no such thing. For me, this is my style choice and at least to me, I think it reads well. I also think it allows the reader to feel like they are really inside the heads of a telepath. It’s also really cool to set yourself apart when you write.
Another issue is how to deal with exclamation points. One, two or three? I also struggle with italics. I use them to show a book or movie title. I also use them to emphasise a word or show when a character is thinking. Overall, I use these two writing tools like bullets in a six-shooter gun. Pick your targets carefully!!! Wait, that was wrong. Pick your targets carefully!
Overall, I think that my writing has improved. I use contractions more often and I pay more attention to my non-book writing. I also think a lot about what I am reading and I’m now finding a lot more mistakes than I used to. Overall, I can see a huge improvement.
I did fond an unlikely helper in my struggle. The addition module to Microsoft Word, Grammarly. It comes in two parts. The first is a free grammar checker and the second part offers “tips” that strengthen your writing. I was reluctant at first, but I installed it. It is a really slow interface and this presents a major issue. The problem is that while using Grammarly there is a huge delay after you make a change. Grammarly also disables Microsoft Word’s internal spell check. I find that after you make a Grammarly pass that you have to go back over your work with Grammarly again to find out what it missed. Then turn Grammarly off and go over it with the Microsoft Word checkers on. Often these second efforts reveal many misspellings and other issues that cropped up in the first Grammarly pass. What they need is a little icon that indicates, “Hey, I’m off doing my checking. So, go get yourself a cup of coffee while I think. I’ll tell you when I’m ready.”
My first use showed over 1600 issues. It took a week to go through it all. Most of the issues were obvious. However, there were some issues that really improved my sentences. The majority of the issues were words that should be combined with hyphens. The other area of concern were words that were spelled correctly, but they were the wrong word. IE, “It’s two late.” Grammarly also wanted a lot of comas added and words moved around. I think the result was stronger and it saved at least 2 hours of professional editing time. I didn’t pay for the “tips” addition because this was $30 per month and I wanted to see what I was getting before I paid.
Was it worth it? I think so. When you present a stronger document to an editor, you have much more control over the process. The editor acts less like a hardcore worker and more of a manager. This allows the editor to do what they do best and I think it makes for a stronger end result. In that area, I think Grammarly is a really great tool.
I did learn something important. The spell check and grammar check in Microsoft Word are really basic. There is a lot of room for improvement and I think Microsoft is now aware of this. Hopefully, they will make some improvements.
Will Grammarly ever replace editors? Absolutely not. In the future, AI will get much better. The result will be better products like Microsoft Word and Grammarly. However, I feel that AI will only address issues in the mechanics of a document. It will be difficult to use AI to address style, fact check, logic, and flow. For example when a character uses slang or bad English, “Who dat over dere?” Or, “WWII ended on September 2, 1955.” An incorrect date could lead to endless complaints about an otherwise great document.
One of the things I do is repeat a thought. “Bob walked out the door. It felt good to be outside. Bob was now through the door.” I have no idea why I write like that. I probably get all wrapped up with emphasizing an important point and end up writing about it too often. It’s probably the engineer in me. The point is that the sentences are perfectly valid. Microsoft Word and Grammarly would never identify the issue. A good editor would catch issues like that.
I do have an interesting history with grammar programs. Long ago, there was a standalone DOS program that would take a word processing document and check it for grammar. I cannot remember the name. I recall that it was not a popular program and the company went away. After the program ran, it would insert comments like: This is a big, big {missing comma} big problem. You would then look through your document and find the {} marks to make the change. I was not too impressed with the program and I always thought that the program used a random number generator to add comments. However, I diligently used it for several papers.
There was one particular paper I did for my psychology class. This final paper was on the relationship between stress and humor. I did a lot of research, came up with logical arguments and presented my case. My professor pulled me aside one day and warned me that she had “great concerns over my grammar” and I needed to make a special effort for this final paper. I used the program, went over the document several times and had a friend with great grammar skills looked it over. He made many corrections. The result was a C with a comment that the subject matter was fine, but the grammar was dismal. As a final insult, she had scratched out a D grade and wrote a C grade.
As I was writing this blog, I decided to go back and look at the paper. I looked it over and there were some areas that needed improving. I ran it through Grammarly and it did find a few items. The items were not too severe and the mistakes were not outrageous. I needed a few commas and there were a few words that were in the wrong tense. However, in the context of a college student, this paper is not that bad. This confirmed what I thought at the time. My teacher was bat-crap crazy. I passed that class and that was all that mattered. For kicks, I put the paper up on my website.
So where does this leave me? I hope AI improves and I will keep using a professional editor. I think editors will always be needed and they are an important part of the process. The good news is that I am improving. The bad news is that I have a long way to go. “Is it less or fewer?” To me, it will always be less. Still got to work on that.
You’re the best.
April 08. 2018
With quotation marks, I still follow the same format. Bob said in a deep voice, “Do this.” Often, I read in other books: “Do this.” Said Bob in a deep voice. I find that style confusing as I want to know who is speaking. To me, this reads like the lights are off and somebody starts talking in a monotone voice. When they stop talking, the lights turn on and it is revealed to be the main character. Then your brain puts it all together and you fill in the fact that the main character HAD a deep voice. Somewhere there is a smart reader thinking, “I knew it all along.” While the rest of us are thinking, “Ahh, now that makes sense.”
I have added a new wrinkle to the quotation mark mystery. My characters in one story are telepathic. I decided not to use quotation marks. Bob thought to Jane, There are no formal rules about telepathic thoughts because there is no such thing. For me, this is my style choice and at least to me, I think it reads well. I also think it allows the reader to feel like they are really inside the heads of a telepath. It’s also really cool to set yourself apart when you write.
Another issue is how to deal with exclamation points. One, two or three? I also struggle with italics. I use them to show a book or movie title. I also use them to emphasise a word or show when a character is thinking. Overall, I use these two writing tools like bullets in a six-shooter gun. Pick your targets carefully!!! Wait, that was wrong. Pick your targets carefully!
Overall, I think that my writing has improved. I use contractions more often and I pay more attention to my non-book writing. I also think a lot about what I am reading and I’m now finding a lot more mistakes than I used to. Overall, I can see a huge improvement.
I did fond an unlikely helper in my struggle. The addition module to Microsoft Word, Grammarly. It comes in two parts. The first is a free grammar checker and the second part offers “tips” that strengthen your writing. I was reluctant at first, but I installed it. It is a really slow interface and this presents a major issue. The problem is that while using Grammarly there is a huge delay after you make a change. Grammarly also disables Microsoft Word’s internal spell check. I find that after you make a Grammarly pass that you have to go back over your work with Grammarly again to find out what it missed. Then turn Grammarly off and go over it with the Microsoft Word checkers on. Often these second efforts reveal many misspellings and other issues that cropped up in the first Grammarly pass. What they need is a little icon that indicates, “Hey, I’m off doing my checking. So, go get yourself a cup of coffee while I think. I’ll tell you when I’m ready.”
My first use showed over 1600 issues. It took a week to go through it all. Most of the issues were obvious. However, there were some issues that really improved my sentences. The majority of the issues were words that should be combined with hyphens. The other area of concern were words that were spelled correctly, but they were the wrong word. IE, “It’s two late.” Grammarly also wanted a lot of comas added and words moved around. I think the result was stronger and it saved at least 2 hours of professional editing time. I didn’t pay for the “tips” addition because this was $30 per month and I wanted to see what I was getting before I paid.
Was it worth it? I think so. When you present a stronger document to an editor, you have much more control over the process. The editor acts less like a hardcore worker and more of a manager. This allows the editor to do what they do best and I think it makes for a stronger end result. In that area, I think Grammarly is a really great tool.
I did learn something important. The spell check and grammar check in Microsoft Word are really basic. There is a lot of room for improvement and I think Microsoft is now aware of this. Hopefully, they will make some improvements.
Will Grammarly ever replace editors? Absolutely not. In the future, AI will get much better. The result will be better products like Microsoft Word and Grammarly. However, I feel that AI will only address issues in the mechanics of a document. It will be difficult to use AI to address style, fact check, logic, and flow. For example when a character uses slang or bad English, “Who dat over dere?” Or, “WWII ended on September 2, 1955.” An incorrect date could lead to endless complaints about an otherwise great document.
One of the things I do is repeat a thought. “Bob walked out the door. It felt good to be outside. Bob was now through the door.” I have no idea why I write like that. I probably get all wrapped up with emphasizing an important point and end up writing about it too often. It’s probably the engineer in me. The point is that the sentences are perfectly valid. Microsoft Word and Grammarly would never identify the issue. A good editor would catch issues like that.
I do have an interesting history with grammar programs. Long ago, there was a standalone DOS program that would take a word processing document and check it for grammar. I cannot remember the name. I recall that it was not a popular program and the company went away. After the program ran, it would insert comments like: This is a big, big {missing comma} big problem. You would then look through your document and find the {} marks to make the change. I was not too impressed with the program and I always thought that the program used a random number generator to add comments. However, I diligently used it for several papers.
There was one particular paper I did for my psychology class. This final paper was on the relationship between stress and humor. I did a lot of research, came up with logical arguments and presented my case. My professor pulled me aside one day and warned me that she had “great concerns over my grammar” and I needed to make a special effort for this final paper. I used the program, went over the document several times and had a friend with great grammar skills looked it over. He made many corrections. The result was a C with a comment that the subject matter was fine, but the grammar was dismal. As a final insult, she had scratched out a D grade and wrote a C grade.
As I was writing this blog, I decided to go back and look at the paper. I looked it over and there were some areas that needed improving. I ran it through Grammarly and it did find a few items. The items were not too severe and the mistakes were not outrageous. I needed a few commas and there were a few words that were in the wrong tense. However, in the context of a college student, this paper is not that bad. This confirmed what I thought at the time. My teacher was bat-crap crazy. I passed that class and that was all that mattered. For kicks, I put the paper up on my website.
So where does this leave me? I hope AI improves and I will keep using a professional editor. I think editors will always be needed and they are an important part of the process. The good news is that I am improving. The bad news is that I have a long way to go. “Is it less or fewer?” To me, it will always be less. Still got to work on that.
You’re the best.
April 08. 2018
Contractions
In ancient times, people started speaking to each other and one day, somebody shortened up two words. They said, “Its going to be hot today.” Instead of, “It is going to be hot today.” Later on, people began developing letters that represented words and they needed a way to describe these shortened words. To solve this dilemma, the contraction was invented. “It’s going to be hot today.” A whole new world of words opened up. Couldn't, he'll, I'm, let's, that's, what're, won't, you're, we’re. And of course, the most important contraction ever written, Bill’s. Well, it’s important to me.
So many new words for authors and readers alike. Well, from my perspective, there was a major problem. I absolutely hated contractions. My first book [Interviewing Immortality] had none in the first draft. My beta reader (mom) asked me, “Why did you intentionally delete all your contractions?” I had no real answer other than to express my dislike. It was clear that my work needed to be updated. To address this, I found a list of contractions and did a search/replace where it seemed appropriate.
“It’s going to be hot today.” To me, that read like an uneducated person describing the weather and not the words of a polished author. The reality is of course that my everyday speech is full of contractions.
When I write, I intentionally “decompress” contractions into their formal two-word form. That’s simply how my mind works. In subsequent books (which are still in the editing stage) I struggled with contractions. When is it proper to use them? Reading other books didn’t help. Authors seemed to use a shotgun loaded with apostrophes and blasted their books. To me, it looked like bad grammar on some pages [overuse] and a complete contraction avoidance on other pages.
Of course, I read all the rules, style guides and made extensive use of grammar programs. To me, it was a forced process, but after 2 years, I occasionally put a contraction into a sentence without a second thought.
However, I’ve come to understand that there’s a harsh reality to effective writing. Good contraction use is the mark of a good author. It shows the mastery of the English language. Why? A contraction is actually power. It allows characters to go from informal to formal. Bob casually stated, “It’s going to be hot today.” Bob warned the assembled people, “It is going to be hot today.” That’s the power of words. They paint a mental picture of what the character is projecting.
For me, this change is still in the beginning stages. I suspect that it will be at least 5 years before I use contractions without a second thought. Recently, I was reviewing one of my old documents and I could see the complete avoidance of contractions. To me, this now read wrong and there was clear room for improvement. It turns out that contractions are actually my new powerful friends. An interesting revelation.
So many new words for authors and readers alike. Well, from my perspective, there was a major problem. I absolutely hated contractions. My first book [Interviewing Immortality] had none in the first draft. My beta reader (mom) asked me, “Why did you intentionally delete all your contractions?” I had no real answer other than to express my dislike. It was clear that my work needed to be updated. To address this, I found a list of contractions and did a search/replace where it seemed appropriate.
“It’s going to be hot today.” To me, that read like an uneducated person describing the weather and not the words of a polished author. The reality is of course that my everyday speech is full of contractions.
When I write, I intentionally “decompress” contractions into their formal two-word form. That’s simply how my mind works. In subsequent books (which are still in the editing stage) I struggled with contractions. When is it proper to use them? Reading other books didn’t help. Authors seemed to use a shotgun loaded with apostrophes and blasted their books. To me, it looked like bad grammar on some pages [overuse] and a complete contraction avoidance on other pages.
Of course, I read all the rules, style guides and made extensive use of grammar programs. To me, it was a forced process, but after 2 years, I occasionally put a contraction into a sentence without a second thought.
However, I’ve come to understand that there’s a harsh reality to effective writing. Good contraction use is the mark of a good author. It shows the mastery of the English language. Why? A contraction is actually power. It allows characters to go from informal to formal. Bob casually stated, “It’s going to be hot today.” Bob warned the assembled people, “It is going to be hot today.” That’s the power of words. They paint a mental picture of what the character is projecting.
For me, this change is still in the beginning stages. I suspect that it will be at least 5 years before I use contractions without a second thought. Recently, I was reviewing one of my old documents and I could see the complete avoidance of contractions. To me, this now read wrong and there was clear room for improvement. It turns out that contractions are actually my new powerful friends. An interesting revelation.
Using Grammarly
The program Grammarly is a great tool that saves time, money and makes my life better. Its purpose is to do a better job of grammar checking than the built-in grammar checking programs. The result is a document that reads better due to less grammatical errors.
There are of course critics and they point out that all grammar-checking programs make mistakes. They also point out that the result of these programs make documents read bland and they lack the raw spark of an un-proofread document. Anti-big brother critics also point out that Grammarly sends the document to a server to be processed which is a security and privacy issue.
For me, I am grateful for any help I can get. Good documents show readers how much effort an author puts into their work. Bad grammar trips up readers and causes negative comments.
On a personal level, it is no secret that my grammar is at best fair. The term “fair” is an upgrade from “poor.” I attribute this upgrade to two factors. The first is that my writing efforts have improved my grammar abilities. The second is that the English language bar has been lowered by the internet. Anybody to publish, post, unintentionally share their work. As a result, every conceivable document is available for public viewing and the vast majority of them haven’t been proofread.
When I use Grammarly, I use it like any other tool. I evaluate its suggestions and make changes where I feel appropriate. Overall, I like its suggestions and it is clear that the tool is getting better.
Grammarly does have its drawbacks. It’s very slow and it has big gaps. For example, it trips up on using the word “who” as opposed to “whom.” It also misses the big picture such as putting in paragraph breaks or adding quotes. Grammarly also does not process slang, intentional poor grammar or technical terms.
Even with its drawbacks, I see a big improvement in my documents. They look more professional and I find the errors they catch to be true mistakes. I see a big future with programs like Grammarly. AI is going to make a massive contribution in this area. Microsoft now has a big gap exposed in its product and I look forward to their response. With some luck, the overall quality of all documents will be raised.
There are of course critics and they point out that all grammar-checking programs make mistakes. They also point out that the result of these programs make documents read bland and they lack the raw spark of an un-proofread document. Anti-big brother critics also point out that Grammarly sends the document to a server to be processed which is a security and privacy issue.
For me, I am grateful for any help I can get. Good documents show readers how much effort an author puts into their work. Bad grammar trips up readers and causes negative comments.
On a personal level, it is no secret that my grammar is at best fair. The term “fair” is an upgrade from “poor.” I attribute this upgrade to two factors. The first is that my writing efforts have improved my grammar abilities. The second is that the English language bar has been lowered by the internet. Anybody to publish, post, unintentionally share their work. As a result, every conceivable document is available for public viewing and the vast majority of them haven’t been proofread.
When I use Grammarly, I use it like any other tool. I evaluate its suggestions and make changes where I feel appropriate. Overall, I like its suggestions and it is clear that the tool is getting better.
Grammarly does have its drawbacks. It’s very slow and it has big gaps. For example, it trips up on using the word “who” as opposed to “whom.” It also misses the big picture such as putting in paragraph breaks or adding quotes. Grammarly also does not process slang, intentional poor grammar or technical terms.
Even with its drawbacks, I see a big improvement in my documents. They look more professional and I find the errors they catch to be true mistakes. I see a big future with programs like Grammarly. AI is going to make a massive contribution in this area. Microsoft now has a big gap exposed in its product and I look forward to their response. With some luck, the overall quality of all documents will be raised.
Bad Grammar
From an early age, English proved to be a difficult subject. Spelling, sentence structure, and crazy rules all messed with my young mind. Of course, many of my classmates had vastly superior skills and when this particular breed grew up, they turned into snobby Grammar critics. “Who should be used in the subject position in a sentence, while who should be used in the object position.” What a useless rule! Why is English so complex? Why don’t we write the way we speak?
My path toward improved English should have taken a graceful course into a sea of misspelled words and incomplete sentences. Instead, I decided to become an author. Words now dominate my thoughts, and I endlessly toil over choosing the best ones. Side note. My four blog followers would likely point out the vast need for improvement.
As my English improved, I began noticing a change in my perception. To my great surprise, sentences in other works had problems. For example, the book Reamde by Neal Stephenson had many issues per page. He is a bestselling author and surly uses a top-notch editor. Right? Apparently not.
Recently, a new trend emerged in my life. Other people’s flaws became so obvious that I felt the compulsive need to complain and correct them. Just this morning, I noticed the advertising slogan on a medical diagnostic company van “Because doctors care.” While this sentence is mostly correct, it made me want to yell, “Who the heck asked this question? Doctors are supposed to care. It’s their job. You guys are not even doctors!” Two years ago, I would not have given that van a second glance.
I recently read this Slashdot article sentence, “Cost-conscious farmers are looking for bargains, and tractors from that era are well-built and totally functional, and aren't as complicated or expensive to repair as more recent models that run on sophisticated software.” Do their tractors fuel up with run-on sentences? Don’t the Slashdot editors look at the headlines? Is there someplace to complain? Should I write a nasty comment?
Wait a minute. Who just wrote that? This is Bill here. The undisputed king of run-on sentences, awful grammar and misspelling. Did I somehow become that grammar hater? Have I switched sides? Is this going to be my new thing? “Stay tuned for epic bad grammar rants.”
By now, my four blog readers have a good grasp of my personality. Long-winded rants into esoteric topics do not lead to “buy it now” clicks. Will I suffer in silence? Perhaps a future blog will have my top ten bad grammar finds. Will my sentences make the cut? They will probably be the first nine.
PS, March 4 is National Grammar Day.
My path toward improved English should have taken a graceful course into a sea of misspelled words and incomplete sentences. Instead, I decided to become an author. Words now dominate my thoughts, and I endlessly toil over choosing the best ones. Side note. My four blog followers would likely point out the vast need for improvement.
As my English improved, I began noticing a change in my perception. To my great surprise, sentences in other works had problems. For example, the book Reamde by Neal Stephenson had many issues per page. He is a bestselling author and surly uses a top-notch editor. Right? Apparently not.
Recently, a new trend emerged in my life. Other people’s flaws became so obvious that I felt the compulsive need to complain and correct them. Just this morning, I noticed the advertising slogan on a medical diagnostic company van “Because doctors care.” While this sentence is mostly correct, it made me want to yell, “Who the heck asked this question? Doctors are supposed to care. It’s their job. You guys are not even doctors!” Two years ago, I would not have given that van a second glance.
I recently read this Slashdot article sentence, “Cost-conscious farmers are looking for bargains, and tractors from that era are well-built and totally functional, and aren't as complicated or expensive to repair as more recent models that run on sophisticated software.” Do their tractors fuel up with run-on sentences? Don’t the Slashdot editors look at the headlines? Is there someplace to complain? Should I write a nasty comment?
Wait a minute. Who just wrote that? This is Bill here. The undisputed king of run-on sentences, awful grammar and misspelling. Did I somehow become that grammar hater? Have I switched sides? Is this going to be my new thing? “Stay tuned for epic bad grammar rants.”
By now, my four blog readers have a good grasp of my personality. Long-winded rants into esoteric topics do not lead to “buy it now” clicks. Will I suffer in silence? Perhaps a future blog will have my top ten bad grammar finds. Will my sentences make the cut? They will probably be the first nine.
PS, March 4 is National Grammar Day.
Future Grammar Checkers
My parents purchased a Texas Instruments 99/4 computer in 1981. How was the word processing? A massive upgrade was required to connect that beast to a printer, and I do not think there were many word-processing programs. Yet there was one bright spot. It had an excellent typing tutor program that I never used...
My father purchased his second computer in 1983 to aid his self-publishing efforts. It was a Wang PC and ran the proprietary Wang word processor. At the time, this was the best word processor available for home use. Unfortunately, we did not have any other programs in the Wang, and I do not think many were available. Perhaps a spreadsheet or database? However, Wang PC had an ace up its sleeve. It had an impact printer (incapable of producing graphics), and the documents it made looked fantastic. One could argue that they looked better (crisper and easier to read) than today’s best laser printers.
By today’s standards, a Wang computer is pathetic, but it was absolute magic for a kid like me. Finally, I could type out a document and correct my mistakes. No white out required! But that was not the best part. The word processor had a spell checker!!! The Wang transformed me into the highest levels of thirteen-year-old spelling talents. Yet, the spell checker was slow, and the suggested words were terrible. Yet, I was in love.
I wish I had my earlier material to share, but the hard drive crapped out, and we lost everything. My father was really upset about losing his books. Ahh, the importance of backups.
Later, my father upgraded to Office Writer, and this was a vast improvement over the Wang. Still later, I convinced him to upgrade to a PC with windows 3.11 and Microsoft Word. Wow, what an improvement.
I would like to get off-topic for a moment. Let’s rewind the clock to the year 1920. How did one publish a book? Authors used a pen or pencil to write a book. They took the handmade pages to a typesetter and manually set the printing press type. Where was the editor? That was an optional step, and the typesetter did some spell-checking. Back then, people spelled better and early books were full of errors.
In the ‘30s, typewriters became popular, but this invention did not change the publishing process. They invented offset printing in the ‘40s, which allowed a typed document to be mass-produced. This reduced the printing cost because it eliminated typesetting, but a new problem occurred. Documents needed to be formatted for printing, which is tricky for a typewriter.
In the late ‘70s, computers with word processors became available. As a self-publisher, the most significant advantage was not the spell-checking, saving, or editing. It was the ability to format the document for publishing. But this requires some explanation.
You will see two standard formats if you pick up a book and turn to a page with text. The first is proportional spacing. Meaning that the amount of space allocated for each character is different. Look at the space required for ten characters. PPPPPPPPPP iiiiiiiiii. The Is take up half of the Ps space. The web page program you use to read this blog has proportional spacing.
The second thing you will see in a book is the spacing is “justified,” meaning that all the text on the left lines up vertically, and so does the right. From a distance, the text appears as a big centered rectangle. Computers accomplish this by making the spaces between words have different lengths from sentence to sentence.
Mechanical typewriters (with one exception, the IBM Selectric III. Side note. My father considered getting a Selectric III over getting a computer. Side-side note. Try to find a working one on eBay. They go for big bucks!) were monospaced and justified spacing could only be achieved with a typesetter.
Why were these two spacing features so crucial to a self-publisher? Books cost money, and more pages are more expensive to print. Yet, readers dislike reduced text. Formatting solves this problem. But why is it extra important for a self-publisher? Books used to be sold in price groups. For example, $4.99 books were about 300 pages. But, if your book was 290 pages, you (whoever paid to print the book) made more money. So, self-publishers invested in good typewriters and computers to develop efficient formatting.
Around 1995, self-publishing changed dramatically because authors could upload a PDF file and print (publish) a book. The quality and accuracy were far higher, and the setup cost was far lower. Now with eBooks and web pages, this is mute. A person could write a book on their phone or “publish” a YouTube video.
Back to the blog. Since windows 3.11, I have kept up with the latest editions of Microsoft Word and added two spelling and grammar checkers. What an improvement over typing on a computer with a green screen. But what is the future of such products?
It’s tough to predict the future, and I blogged about this difficulty:
https://interviewingimmortality.com/b...
However, despite my warnings, I wanted to give it a shot with the future of grammar and spell checkers. But hang on, this should be a simple task. “They will get better.” Meaning more accurate spell-checking, improved content tips, and more effective grammar checking. Not that hard to predict the future.
Yet, I believe there is additional room for prediction. For example, in my third book, I invented the alien race called the Veronn. Wait a moment. My spell-checking just flagged that word because it is not in the English language. Is Veronn a noun or verb? Does it need to be capitalized? Are two Veronn called Veronn or Veronns? Considering that I made up the word, I can assign any rule I desire.
Fictional words are an enormous problem for spell checkers. The best present technology can do is ignore (not flag) an unrecognized word. So, my first prediction for future spell checkers is to have a detailed entry for invented words. This leads to my second prediction for spell checkers. They will search the internet for unknown words and make “educated” suggestions. Essentially, an interactive spell checker.
For Grammar checkers, my big prediction is to analyze a document for the author’s style and adapt the rules to follow that style. Another area for improvement is the overall style. “The phrase dynamite is no longer popular. Consider the following suggestions.” Another area is logic. “That sentence makes little sense within the content of this paragraph.” And content. “Female readers will find this sentence offensive.” Other. “This sentence contains a pun.” “This sentence is redundant. Consider deleting.”
I also see a revolution coming. There are far too many inconsistent grammar and spelling rules. The grammar and spell check people might get together and establish firm rules. The various programs fight each other, and it is getting worse with each revision.
What about using artificial intelligence to analyze documents to develop better grammar checkers? I suspect word-processing programmers were unsuccessful in this area. English is too chaotic, and sound documents require proper and improper rules.
What is a bridge too far? I do not think grammar checkers will ever be able to evaluate the content or the big picture. “The main character’s motivation is unclear.” “Where did Sally get the knife?” “Add a paragraph to describe the scene.” “This description is weak.” Can artificial intelligence analyze cherished stories and come up with some basics? I think this arduous task will take a long time to achieve.
Well, I have made some lofty predictions. Hopefully, my four blog readers will live long enough to see if I hit the mark.
My father purchased his second computer in 1983 to aid his self-publishing efforts. It was a Wang PC and ran the proprietary Wang word processor. At the time, this was the best word processor available for home use. Unfortunately, we did not have any other programs in the Wang, and I do not think many were available. Perhaps a spreadsheet or database? However, Wang PC had an ace up its sleeve. It had an impact printer (incapable of producing graphics), and the documents it made looked fantastic. One could argue that they looked better (crisper and easier to read) than today’s best laser printers.
By today’s standards, a Wang computer is pathetic, but it was absolute magic for a kid like me. Finally, I could type out a document and correct my mistakes. No white out required! But that was not the best part. The word processor had a spell checker!!! The Wang transformed me into the highest levels of thirteen-year-old spelling talents. Yet, the spell checker was slow, and the suggested words were terrible. Yet, I was in love.
I wish I had my earlier material to share, but the hard drive crapped out, and we lost everything. My father was really upset about losing his books. Ahh, the importance of backups.
Later, my father upgraded to Office Writer, and this was a vast improvement over the Wang. Still later, I convinced him to upgrade to a PC with windows 3.11 and Microsoft Word. Wow, what an improvement.
I would like to get off-topic for a moment. Let’s rewind the clock to the year 1920. How did one publish a book? Authors used a pen or pencil to write a book. They took the handmade pages to a typesetter and manually set the printing press type. Where was the editor? That was an optional step, and the typesetter did some spell-checking. Back then, people spelled better and early books were full of errors.
In the ‘30s, typewriters became popular, but this invention did not change the publishing process. They invented offset printing in the ‘40s, which allowed a typed document to be mass-produced. This reduced the printing cost because it eliminated typesetting, but a new problem occurred. Documents needed to be formatted for printing, which is tricky for a typewriter.
In the late ‘70s, computers with word processors became available. As a self-publisher, the most significant advantage was not the spell-checking, saving, or editing. It was the ability to format the document for publishing. But this requires some explanation.
You will see two standard formats if you pick up a book and turn to a page with text. The first is proportional spacing. Meaning that the amount of space allocated for each character is different. Look at the space required for ten characters. PPPPPPPPPP iiiiiiiiii. The Is take up half of the Ps space. The web page program you use to read this blog has proportional spacing.
The second thing you will see in a book is the spacing is “justified,” meaning that all the text on the left lines up vertically, and so does the right. From a distance, the text appears as a big centered rectangle. Computers accomplish this by making the spaces between words have different lengths from sentence to sentence.
Mechanical typewriters (with one exception, the IBM Selectric III. Side note. My father considered getting a Selectric III over getting a computer. Side-side note. Try to find a working one on eBay. They go for big bucks!) were monospaced and justified spacing could only be achieved with a typesetter.
Why were these two spacing features so crucial to a self-publisher? Books cost money, and more pages are more expensive to print. Yet, readers dislike reduced text. Formatting solves this problem. But why is it extra important for a self-publisher? Books used to be sold in price groups. For example, $4.99 books were about 300 pages. But, if your book was 290 pages, you (whoever paid to print the book) made more money. So, self-publishers invested in good typewriters and computers to develop efficient formatting.
Around 1995, self-publishing changed dramatically because authors could upload a PDF file and print (publish) a book. The quality and accuracy were far higher, and the setup cost was far lower. Now with eBooks and web pages, this is mute. A person could write a book on their phone or “publish” a YouTube video.
Back to the blog. Since windows 3.11, I have kept up with the latest editions of Microsoft Word and added two spelling and grammar checkers. What an improvement over typing on a computer with a green screen. But what is the future of such products?
It’s tough to predict the future, and I blogged about this difficulty:
https://interviewingimmortality.com/b...
However, despite my warnings, I wanted to give it a shot with the future of grammar and spell checkers. But hang on, this should be a simple task. “They will get better.” Meaning more accurate spell-checking, improved content tips, and more effective grammar checking. Not that hard to predict the future.
Yet, I believe there is additional room for prediction. For example, in my third book, I invented the alien race called the Veronn. Wait a moment. My spell-checking just flagged that word because it is not in the English language. Is Veronn a noun or verb? Does it need to be capitalized? Are two Veronn called Veronn or Veronns? Considering that I made up the word, I can assign any rule I desire.
Fictional words are an enormous problem for spell checkers. The best present technology can do is ignore (not flag) an unrecognized word. So, my first prediction for future spell checkers is to have a detailed entry for invented words. This leads to my second prediction for spell checkers. They will search the internet for unknown words and make “educated” suggestions. Essentially, an interactive spell checker.
For Grammar checkers, my big prediction is to analyze a document for the author’s style and adapt the rules to follow that style. Another area for improvement is the overall style. “The phrase dynamite is no longer popular. Consider the following suggestions.” Another area is logic. “That sentence makes little sense within the content of this paragraph.” And content. “Female readers will find this sentence offensive.” Other. “This sentence contains a pun.” “This sentence is redundant. Consider deleting.”
I also see a revolution coming. There are far too many inconsistent grammar and spelling rules. The grammar and spell check people might get together and establish firm rules. The various programs fight each other, and it is getting worse with each revision.
What about using artificial intelligence to analyze documents to develop better grammar checkers? I suspect word-processing programmers were unsuccessful in this area. English is too chaotic, and sound documents require proper and improper rules.
What is a bridge too far? I do not think grammar checkers will ever be able to evaluate the content or the big picture. “The main character’s motivation is unclear.” “Where did Sally get the knife?” “Add a paragraph to describe the scene.” “This description is weak.” Can artificial intelligence analyze cherished stories and come up with some basics? I think this arduous task will take a long time to achieve.
Well, I have made some lofty predictions. Hopefully, my four blog readers will live long enough to see if I hit the mark.
Is Proper English Still necessary?
When I was a young pup, all the students immediately grasped reading and writing. It looked so easy, but I struggled despite trying my best. Things began changing in the ninth grade, and I started making peace with grammar, spelling, and writing.
Why was mastering the English language so important? English? They ripped off the word from the name of a country. Lame. The answer is that we no longer solely depend on verbal words to communicate in our modern society. Instead, we write concepts on paper, enter them into a computer, or print them on a printing press. Written words have become the primary means of communication, information, computation, and understanding. Thus, it is necessary to have an agreed-upon format, and education forces students to follow these rules.
And the result is fantastic. “Today, I ate a red apple for breakfast.” There is no ambiguity in that sentence. Every single reader 100% understood exactly what information I intended to convey. And what a great sentence! Did you notice the capital letter at the beginning and the period at the end? How helpful! And that coma? Readers know exactly when to pause while speaking. Genius!
Professionals, employers, teachers, and readers expect/demand good sentence structure to work, communicate, understand, research, record, archive, share, debate, and absorb the content. Even if all the meaning is present, a poorly written sentence trips up the system because readers get confused. Sometimes, the error can be so bad that the confusion can only be resolved by contacting the author.
Finally, a well-written document is so much more impressive. It stands out as the mark of a true professional, and they can be proud of their creation. Proper documents power our modern world and prepare us for a fantastic future.
Well, it seems like I have summed things up neatly. Spelling, punctuation, and grammar are all essential for a functioning society. Nothing more to say. Yet… Some cracks are forming. Let’s start with the with our “solid foundation.” What is the standard set of rules for the English language? That’s easy. The Chicago Manual of Style. Obviously!
Umm, how many kids/adults even know about this book? Did the teacher bring it out in your first-grade class? No. Why not? Oh, it is too complex for kids. Now, hold on. Remember going to Sunday school as a kid to learn about religion? Yup, on the first day, some religious person tossed a Bible/Torah/Koran right at you, and you spent the next 10-100 years trying to figure out the meaning.
Have you read the Chicago Manual of Style? What a confusing mess! But it is perfect, right? Umm. Why is it on the seventeenth edition? Hmm, it sounds like the manual needed improving. And who decided the Chicago Manual of Style was the master default source? I never even heard of the thing until I was 50.
It used to be that when you bought a car, you jumped in and drove off. The Lexus we purchased five years ago has FIVE manuals. The owner’s manual is 907 pages, and the entertainment/navigation system is 416 pages. Is it necessary to read all that? If you want to understand how to navigate, it sure is.
According to Toner Buzz:
• Each year, 500,000 to 1 million new books come out.
• Including self-published authors, the count reaches close to 4 million new book titles each year.
• In 2021, there were about 2.3 million new self-published books in the US, marking a decline compared to the preceding two years.
https://www.tonerbuzz.com/blog/how-ma...
Plus there is internet information, prior published books, newspapers, magazines, textbooks, journals, letters, and advertisements. They even have entire buildings filled with books, called libraries. What is a library? Dang, you will have to go to the library, to get a dictionary to look up that word.
It is all too much, and something must give. Quality. Yes, the effort we put into writing quality has begun to slip. Now, English errors are more common and get less attention.
Speaking of introducing errors, we now have a new player. Yes, Artificial Intelligence is now in the typeset seat. Yay! Need to create a 1000-word report about George Washington? ChatGPT: Create a 1000-word report about the life and history of George Washington. Done! And the result will read well. Very well! But… ChatGPT is not a person. It makes weird mistakes, gets repetitive, confusing, wordy, and produces incorrect results. But the grammar/spelling and punctuation is fantastic. Right?
ChatGPT created sentences that look good with a quick review, but I see flaws when I study sentence structure. (Note: I do not use ChatGPT for writing. I do use it for a story idea sounding board.) The funny thing is that ChatGPT is getting worse. It blabbers on about nonsense and gets into strange side tangents. I have spotted two glaring spelling mistakes.
We have another problem: Spell/grammar checkers. Wow, they have changed my life. I love Grammarly, ProWritingAid, Thesarus.com, Dictonary.com, Wikipedia, and random name generators. Astounding! And I can even hire a ghostwriter, beta reader, or copy editor. They charge by the word. Just like Uber charges by the mile!
What happens when these incredible resources disagree? All those tools are synchronized to the latest edition of The Chicago Manual of Style, The Modern Language Association of America handbook, and the Oxford Dictionary. Right? They are not? What? How can that be? They do their own thing because nobody can agree upon the rules. Know what is worse? Besides America, other countries speak English, and their rules differ.
Plus, there is a new player: social media and streaming sites. We used to get all our essential information from written sources like textbooks, manuals, guides, reference books, or data sheets. Let’s say I want to remove the engine from my car. I used to go to the library and check out one or more books on automotive repair. Then, I would search for the chapter on engine removal and follow the steps. The manual will include important cautions, tips, warnings, and pictures/diagrams.
Now, I search YouTube for “engine removal” and then watch the informative video. If I do not like the video, I click on another. What is the problem? YouTube viewers will listen to a person naturally speaking without a script, and there will be many grammatical errors. This means that hearing verbal errors is becoming more acceptable, which translates to writing errors being more acceptable.
Now for the most significant attack on the English language. Kids text all day and night. Punctuation is actively frowned upon, and kids intentionally misspell words. Teachers are completely overwhelmed, and they have another problem.
Popular social agendas have ruined the education system, and politicians are introducing programs without trials or public input. For example, my daughter graduated from a high school with the “No Child Left Behind” program. Wow, that sounds impressive.
What did this program replace? They used to have an Advanced Placement class for the smart kids, a regular class, and a class to help the struggling kids. Now, they throw them together with the idea that the smart kids will help struggling kids.
Result? Group tests, projects, and homework. My daughter was placed with three average kids and two struggles. So, she would do the work while the others play on their phones. Even when she asks for their input, they refuse to help. A+ for everyone! What does this mean? This means that chimps learning sign language get a better education than five out of six kids.
It gets worse. Because the administrators at her high school spent all their money on giving themselves raises, they must cheap out as much as possible. So, they use open-source (free) software instead of industry-standard programs. Do companies use open-source programs? No, because they must administer their employees, open-source programs are nearly impossible to control, secure, or maintain.
Now, I must pivot. I got my latest book back from my copy editor and have been reviewing the edits. My guy is fantastic and uncovered so many errors I never would have spotted. Wonderful!
Well, I found a significant error that the copy editor missed. See if you can spot it. This is a dialog between two characters:
“I try.”
“Stop being so modest and take the compliment,” Kim chided,
“Alright.”
I ended a sentence with a comma and not a period. This mistake is easy to miss because a comma and a period look similar. Side note: Grammarly, Microsoft Word, and ProWritingAid also missed it. Boo!
This error is big enough for a bus to drive through. And I was even more upset because I caught the mistake after reviewing the document several times. But then I thought about the reality of the situation. Was my mistake that bad?
I see spelling mistakes on massive billboards, gobbledygook from bestselling authors, and text messages that are so bad that I cannot make heads or tails of them. My comma mix-up was a minor boo-boo—no big deal.
Yet, I remained angry. “I should have caught this! My editor should have caught this! Hey, you messed up, Grammarly, Microsoft Word, and ProWritingAid!”
Am I writing this article to give myself a pass? No, quite the opposite. Today, there are more tools than ever to correct English flaws. Plus, the internet provides a vast resource for properly learning English, and the rules are better documented than ever. So, there is no excuse for improper English.
Yet… Have you read a book review lately? I often see comments like: “Needed editing.” “I spotted six spelling errors in the first chapter.” “Did a sixth grader write this?” “They used ChatGPT to write the entire book.”
And there is a final smack in the face. It has taken me a lifetime of struggling to attain basic English skills. Now that I can appreciate finely crafted sentences (I love you, Neil Gaiman!!!), everything has turned to junk.
My question remains. How upset should I be by my comma mistake? So many people discourage proper English, and a well-written sentence looks out of place. My answer is that I will try my best, but this feels like a battle where I am the only one who cares about the outcome.
You’re the best -Bill
September 11, 2024
Why was mastering the English language so important? English? They ripped off the word from the name of a country. Lame. The answer is that we no longer solely depend on verbal words to communicate in our modern society. Instead, we write concepts on paper, enter them into a computer, or print them on a printing press. Written words have become the primary means of communication, information, computation, and understanding. Thus, it is necessary to have an agreed-upon format, and education forces students to follow these rules.
And the result is fantastic. “Today, I ate a red apple for breakfast.” There is no ambiguity in that sentence. Every single reader 100% understood exactly what information I intended to convey. And what a great sentence! Did you notice the capital letter at the beginning and the period at the end? How helpful! And that coma? Readers know exactly when to pause while speaking. Genius!
Professionals, employers, teachers, and readers expect/demand good sentence structure to work, communicate, understand, research, record, archive, share, debate, and absorb the content. Even if all the meaning is present, a poorly written sentence trips up the system because readers get confused. Sometimes, the error can be so bad that the confusion can only be resolved by contacting the author.
Finally, a well-written document is so much more impressive. It stands out as the mark of a true professional, and they can be proud of their creation. Proper documents power our modern world and prepare us for a fantastic future.
Well, it seems like I have summed things up neatly. Spelling, punctuation, and grammar are all essential for a functioning society. Nothing more to say. Yet… Some cracks are forming. Let’s start with the with our “solid foundation.” What is the standard set of rules for the English language? That’s easy. The Chicago Manual of Style. Obviously!
Umm, how many kids/adults even know about this book? Did the teacher bring it out in your first-grade class? No. Why not? Oh, it is too complex for kids. Now, hold on. Remember going to Sunday school as a kid to learn about religion? Yup, on the first day, some religious person tossed a Bible/Torah/Koran right at you, and you spent the next 10-100 years trying to figure out the meaning.
Have you read the Chicago Manual of Style? What a confusing mess! But it is perfect, right? Umm. Why is it on the seventeenth edition? Hmm, it sounds like the manual needed improving. And who decided the Chicago Manual of Style was the master default source? I never even heard of the thing until I was 50.
It used to be that when you bought a car, you jumped in and drove off. The Lexus we purchased five years ago has FIVE manuals. The owner’s manual is 907 pages, and the entertainment/navigation system is 416 pages. Is it necessary to read all that? If you want to understand how to navigate, it sure is.
According to Toner Buzz:
• Each year, 500,000 to 1 million new books come out.
• Including self-published authors, the count reaches close to 4 million new book titles each year.
• In 2021, there were about 2.3 million new self-published books in the US, marking a decline compared to the preceding two years.
https://www.tonerbuzz.com/blog/how-ma...
Plus there is internet information, prior published books, newspapers, magazines, textbooks, journals, letters, and advertisements. They even have entire buildings filled with books, called libraries. What is a library? Dang, you will have to go to the library, to get a dictionary to look up that word.
It is all too much, and something must give. Quality. Yes, the effort we put into writing quality has begun to slip. Now, English errors are more common and get less attention.
Speaking of introducing errors, we now have a new player. Yes, Artificial Intelligence is now in the typeset seat. Yay! Need to create a 1000-word report about George Washington? ChatGPT: Create a 1000-word report about the life and history of George Washington. Done! And the result will read well. Very well! But… ChatGPT is not a person. It makes weird mistakes, gets repetitive, confusing, wordy, and produces incorrect results. But the grammar/spelling and punctuation is fantastic. Right?
ChatGPT created sentences that look good with a quick review, but I see flaws when I study sentence structure. (Note: I do not use ChatGPT for writing. I do use it for a story idea sounding board.) The funny thing is that ChatGPT is getting worse. It blabbers on about nonsense and gets into strange side tangents. I have spotted two glaring spelling mistakes.
We have another problem: Spell/grammar checkers. Wow, they have changed my life. I love Grammarly, ProWritingAid, Thesarus.com, Dictonary.com, Wikipedia, and random name generators. Astounding! And I can even hire a ghostwriter, beta reader, or copy editor. They charge by the word. Just like Uber charges by the mile!
What happens when these incredible resources disagree? All those tools are synchronized to the latest edition of The Chicago Manual of Style, The Modern Language Association of America handbook, and the Oxford Dictionary. Right? They are not? What? How can that be? They do their own thing because nobody can agree upon the rules. Know what is worse? Besides America, other countries speak English, and their rules differ.
Plus, there is a new player: social media and streaming sites. We used to get all our essential information from written sources like textbooks, manuals, guides, reference books, or data sheets. Let’s say I want to remove the engine from my car. I used to go to the library and check out one or more books on automotive repair. Then, I would search for the chapter on engine removal and follow the steps. The manual will include important cautions, tips, warnings, and pictures/diagrams.
Now, I search YouTube for “engine removal” and then watch the informative video. If I do not like the video, I click on another. What is the problem? YouTube viewers will listen to a person naturally speaking without a script, and there will be many grammatical errors. This means that hearing verbal errors is becoming more acceptable, which translates to writing errors being more acceptable.
Now for the most significant attack on the English language. Kids text all day and night. Punctuation is actively frowned upon, and kids intentionally misspell words. Teachers are completely overwhelmed, and they have another problem.
Popular social agendas have ruined the education system, and politicians are introducing programs without trials or public input. For example, my daughter graduated from a high school with the “No Child Left Behind” program. Wow, that sounds impressive.
What did this program replace? They used to have an Advanced Placement class for the smart kids, a regular class, and a class to help the struggling kids. Now, they throw them together with the idea that the smart kids will help struggling kids.
Result? Group tests, projects, and homework. My daughter was placed with three average kids and two struggles. So, she would do the work while the others play on their phones. Even when she asks for their input, they refuse to help. A+ for everyone! What does this mean? This means that chimps learning sign language get a better education than five out of six kids.
It gets worse. Because the administrators at her high school spent all their money on giving themselves raises, they must cheap out as much as possible. So, they use open-source (free) software instead of industry-standard programs. Do companies use open-source programs? No, because they must administer their employees, open-source programs are nearly impossible to control, secure, or maintain.
Now, I must pivot. I got my latest book back from my copy editor and have been reviewing the edits. My guy is fantastic and uncovered so many errors I never would have spotted. Wonderful!
Well, I found a significant error that the copy editor missed. See if you can spot it. This is a dialog between two characters:
“I try.”
“Stop being so modest and take the compliment,” Kim chided,
“Alright.”
I ended a sentence with a comma and not a period. This mistake is easy to miss because a comma and a period look similar. Side note: Grammarly, Microsoft Word, and ProWritingAid also missed it. Boo!
This error is big enough for a bus to drive through. And I was even more upset because I caught the mistake after reviewing the document several times. But then I thought about the reality of the situation. Was my mistake that bad?
I see spelling mistakes on massive billboards, gobbledygook from bestselling authors, and text messages that are so bad that I cannot make heads or tails of them. My comma mix-up was a minor boo-boo—no big deal.
Yet, I remained angry. “I should have caught this! My editor should have caught this! Hey, you messed up, Grammarly, Microsoft Word, and ProWritingAid!”
Am I writing this article to give myself a pass? No, quite the opposite. Today, there are more tools than ever to correct English flaws. Plus, the internet provides a vast resource for properly learning English, and the rules are better documented than ever. So, there is no excuse for improper English.
Yet… Have you read a book review lately? I often see comments like: “Needed editing.” “I spotted six spelling errors in the first chapter.” “Did a sixth grader write this?” “They used ChatGPT to write the entire book.”
And there is a final smack in the face. It has taken me a lifetime of struggling to attain basic English skills. Now that I can appreciate finely crafted sentences (I love you, Neil Gaiman!!!), everything has turned to junk.
My question remains. How upset should I be by my comma mistake? So many people discourage proper English, and a well-written sentence looks out of place. My answer is that I will try my best, but this feels like a battle where I am the only one who cares about the outcome.
You’re the best -Bill
September 11, 2024
The Dramatic Semicolon Decline
Yesterday, I randomly found this article:
https://www.theguardian.com/science/2...
It claimed that over the last 20 years, the use of semicolons in British English has fallen by 50%. I have also noticed the decline, but I did not think it was this severe. Well, what is going on? Of course, I have a wacky theory.
But first, when is it appropriate to use a semicolon? I could provide the Wikipedia answer, but I prefer my own methodically researched version. It is used when… Alright, truth. I have no idea. My best guess is that a semicolon gets mashed in between two disconnected topics. Its purpose is to magically separate the two thoughts. As far as when they are appropriate? I let MS Word, ProWritingAid, Grammarly, or my editor sprinkle them in. Otherwise, those pesky little beasts never enter my documents. Translation: I only use them when I am told to because they are a complete mystery.
Well… I could investigate the matter. Perhaps even learn something. I suppose, but I would rather leave it to the professionals, which leads to my theory. I think I am not alone because I do not want to look like an idiot by misusing them. Instead, I use a coma or period, which seems more than enough to separate thoughts. Also, a sentence with a semicolon is often misread. Why?
The whole point of punctuation is to help the reader and, more importantly, the speaker. “Stan played with his toy car, boat, plane and spaceship.” What an amazing sentence. First, there was a capital letter at the beginning. Nice! I know when to begin speaking. Then, the comma indicates when to pause naturally. Thus, the listening person knows the toys are separate. Meaning the car is different from the boat, as opposed to a vehicle that can transition between land and water. Finally, that wonderful period. I know precisely when to stop speaking.
But a semicolon? Umm. Am I supposed to pause my speech longer than usual? Is this for dramatic effect? Is this literary device an “almost” comma or “maybe” period? Should I treat it like a yield sign instead of a caution sign? How is it supposed to help the reader or speaker?
Alright, I broke down and researched the matter. “A semicolon connects two closely related independent clauses within a single sentence or separates items in a series when those items contain commas or are lengthy. It’s used when a period would be too strong and a comma too weak.”
Wow, that explanation made things so much worse. Too many commas? Strong period? That makes little sense. “Stan played with his toy car; boat; plane; and spaceship.” So, he never plays with them at the same time because of the semicolon? And only grammar experts would know this. Yay?
I am no closer to understanding the semicolon, and my research convinced me that my confusion is justified. So yes, I am allowing the semicolon to fade into obscurity. It is too complex for today’s reader, and me. Now, if we can only get rid of the long dash—, underscore_ and vertical bar|
You’re the best -Bill
June 11, 2025
https://www.theguardian.com/science/2...
It claimed that over the last 20 years, the use of semicolons in British English has fallen by 50%. I have also noticed the decline, but I did not think it was this severe. Well, what is going on? Of course, I have a wacky theory.
But first, when is it appropriate to use a semicolon? I could provide the Wikipedia answer, but I prefer my own methodically researched version. It is used when… Alright, truth. I have no idea. My best guess is that a semicolon gets mashed in between two disconnected topics. Its purpose is to magically separate the two thoughts. As far as when they are appropriate? I let MS Word, ProWritingAid, Grammarly, or my editor sprinkle them in. Otherwise, those pesky little beasts never enter my documents. Translation: I only use them when I am told to because they are a complete mystery.
Well… I could investigate the matter. Perhaps even learn something. I suppose, but I would rather leave it to the professionals, which leads to my theory. I think I am not alone because I do not want to look like an idiot by misusing them. Instead, I use a coma or period, which seems more than enough to separate thoughts. Also, a sentence with a semicolon is often misread. Why?
The whole point of punctuation is to help the reader and, more importantly, the speaker. “Stan played with his toy car, boat, plane and spaceship.” What an amazing sentence. First, there was a capital letter at the beginning. Nice! I know when to begin speaking. Then, the comma indicates when to pause naturally. Thus, the listening person knows the toys are separate. Meaning the car is different from the boat, as opposed to a vehicle that can transition between land and water. Finally, that wonderful period. I know precisely when to stop speaking.
But a semicolon? Umm. Am I supposed to pause my speech longer than usual? Is this for dramatic effect? Is this literary device an “almost” comma or “maybe” period? Should I treat it like a yield sign instead of a caution sign? How is it supposed to help the reader or speaker?
Alright, I broke down and researched the matter. “A semicolon connects two closely related independent clauses within a single sentence or separates items in a series when those items contain commas or are lengthy. It’s used when a period would be too strong and a comma too weak.”
Wow, that explanation made things so much worse. Too many commas? Strong period? That makes little sense. “Stan played with his toy car; boat; plane; and spaceship.” So, he never plays with them at the same time because of the semicolon? And only grammar experts would know this. Yay?
I am no closer to understanding the semicolon, and my research convinced me that my confusion is justified. So yes, I am allowing the semicolon to fade into obscurity. It is too complex for today’s reader, and me. Now, if we can only get rid of the long dash—, underscore_ and vertical bar|
You’re the best -Bill
June 11, 2025
