Bill Conrad's Blog - Posts Tagged "life"
Life is Always More Complicated
It’s tempting to describe our lives using simple concepts. Sally entered the conference room and yelled at her coworkers. Why? Person one knows her to be a mean person. Person two is aware of Sally’s personal issues which clearly affected her judgment. Person three is convinced her anger resulted from their project failing to meet the required numbers. Person four insulted Sally last week and this is retribution. Four different people and four different conclusions. Yet, each person is convinced they understand Sally.
In the above example, the “truth” is likely a combination of factors, a single overriding factor or something unrelated. Humans can be unpredictable, distracted, confused and obsessed. What’s worse is that the very element which guides us (our minds) may be damaged, obsessed or drugged out. The possibility also exists that our emotions result from boredom, mistakes, or somebody else’s involvement. To make matters worse, we lie, deceive, hate and are confused.
If we invented a scanner to see inside Sally’s mind, it’s likely that her anger resulted from a specific issue. Before she entered the room, she focused her anger enough to speak. Let’s pretend that the logical conclusion is correct; the team’s bad numbers upset Sally. The last time this occurred, she yelled at the team resulting in workplace improvement. Yet, during Sally’s rant, she didn’t mention numbers. Did she lose her cool and forgot the main topic?
What kind of person is Sally? Is she a jerk, uncontrolled, stupid, arrogant, over-confident or spiteful? Did she make an honest mistake? Is this event indicative of her life? Will the team’s performance improve? Plus, we have not considered what will occur after the event. There may be weeks of hurt feelings, retribution, slowdown, HR reports or sabotage. Perhaps there will be growth, change, energetic coworkers and improved numbers.
What’s the point? It’s easy to assume that Sally is not a complex person. She got mad one day and nothing more. I disagree. Sally is a mature woman with a developed personality based on a lifetime of education, experiences, social experiments, observation of others and mistakes. Even if she had a single overriding reason, many aspects came into play. It took effort to speak up and Sally made a choice.
Now that we have discussed Sally’s complex life, let's write about it. That endeavor presents a problem. Most fictional stories have many characters. She may simply be a minor character to move the plot along. Alternatively, Sally might be the main character with an extensive background. Her motives must be explained and fully vetted. This will allow the reader to appreciate her role, decisions, actions, and reasoning.
Even if Sally’s character contains a well-described background, no book could fully capture her lifetime of experience. As readers, we understand that the simple act of yelling at a bunch of people contains more depth. Every word, action, and reactions are essential to understand the overall incident. (For example, did Sally swear, quote the bible, talk down or provide an inspirational message.) If an author were to describe Sally in-depth, the book would be massive, boring, overly descriptive and difficult to publish/write. To solve this issue, we accepted an uncomplicated Sally; one day, she yelled at her team.
Nonfiction authors must travel down a different path. Let’s pretend Sally is actually the famous aviator Amelia Earhart. Amelia walked into the room and yelled at the people about her flight plan. Umm... It’s not that easy. While Amelia is no longer with us, we must answer many questions. What is the foundation for her anger? Why did she choose to speak up that day? Is she always this angry? Readers must understand her personality/motives/history in order to put the significance of this historical event into context. Unfortunately, Amelia's actions are in the past, cannot be changed and she cannot be interviewed. As a writer, the only option is to explain her actions/decisions in the best possible context.
Why? As humans, we cannot accept the basic premise that (the real) Amelia randomly yelled at a group. Something needed to guide her actions and readers need to understand the source of her anger. However, the writer describing the incident needs to guess about her true motives. The result is a fact-based opinion that explains her actions.
In life, we have a different method of looking at people. In the above example, we would be either person one, two, three, four or Sally. Let’s pretend we’re person one. Sally is a mean person, she yelled at me and I no longer like her. Simple. Right?
Life is more complex. It’s likely that after a good night’s sleep and things would not seem as bad. She might apologize or at least appear to be disappointed about her actions. Or we could calmly discuss the matter. Alternatively, there could be negative consequences. However, from that point forward, the relationship between Sally and me would change. Humans have excellent memories and they use their experiences in many ways.
This point of this blog is that life is quite complex and a simple event is not simple. Humans have a lot going on and yet, we try to write about complex events as if they were simple. It’s fun to explore people and characters. Yet, we can never fully capture them.
In the above example, the “truth” is likely a combination of factors, a single overriding factor or something unrelated. Humans can be unpredictable, distracted, confused and obsessed. What’s worse is that the very element which guides us (our minds) may be damaged, obsessed or drugged out. The possibility also exists that our emotions result from boredom, mistakes, or somebody else’s involvement. To make matters worse, we lie, deceive, hate and are confused.
If we invented a scanner to see inside Sally’s mind, it’s likely that her anger resulted from a specific issue. Before she entered the room, she focused her anger enough to speak. Let’s pretend that the logical conclusion is correct; the team’s bad numbers upset Sally. The last time this occurred, she yelled at the team resulting in workplace improvement. Yet, during Sally’s rant, she didn’t mention numbers. Did she lose her cool and forgot the main topic?
What kind of person is Sally? Is she a jerk, uncontrolled, stupid, arrogant, over-confident or spiteful? Did she make an honest mistake? Is this event indicative of her life? Will the team’s performance improve? Plus, we have not considered what will occur after the event. There may be weeks of hurt feelings, retribution, slowdown, HR reports or sabotage. Perhaps there will be growth, change, energetic coworkers and improved numbers.
What’s the point? It’s easy to assume that Sally is not a complex person. She got mad one day and nothing more. I disagree. Sally is a mature woman with a developed personality based on a lifetime of education, experiences, social experiments, observation of others and mistakes. Even if she had a single overriding reason, many aspects came into play. It took effort to speak up and Sally made a choice.
Now that we have discussed Sally’s complex life, let's write about it. That endeavor presents a problem. Most fictional stories have many characters. She may simply be a minor character to move the plot along. Alternatively, Sally might be the main character with an extensive background. Her motives must be explained and fully vetted. This will allow the reader to appreciate her role, decisions, actions, and reasoning.
Even if Sally’s character contains a well-described background, no book could fully capture her lifetime of experience. As readers, we understand that the simple act of yelling at a bunch of people contains more depth. Every word, action, and reactions are essential to understand the overall incident. (For example, did Sally swear, quote the bible, talk down or provide an inspirational message.) If an author were to describe Sally in-depth, the book would be massive, boring, overly descriptive and difficult to publish/write. To solve this issue, we accepted an uncomplicated Sally; one day, she yelled at her team.
Nonfiction authors must travel down a different path. Let’s pretend Sally is actually the famous aviator Amelia Earhart. Amelia walked into the room and yelled at the people about her flight plan. Umm... It’s not that easy. While Amelia is no longer with us, we must answer many questions. What is the foundation for her anger? Why did she choose to speak up that day? Is she always this angry? Readers must understand her personality/motives/history in order to put the significance of this historical event into context. Unfortunately, Amelia's actions are in the past, cannot be changed and she cannot be interviewed. As a writer, the only option is to explain her actions/decisions in the best possible context.
Why? As humans, we cannot accept the basic premise that (the real) Amelia randomly yelled at a group. Something needed to guide her actions and readers need to understand the source of her anger. However, the writer describing the incident needs to guess about her true motives. The result is a fact-based opinion that explains her actions.
In life, we have a different method of looking at people. In the above example, we would be either person one, two, three, four or Sally. Let’s pretend we’re person one. Sally is a mean person, she yelled at me and I no longer like her. Simple. Right?
Life is more complex. It’s likely that after a good night’s sleep and things would not seem as bad. She might apologize or at least appear to be disappointed about her actions. Or we could calmly discuss the matter. Alternatively, there could be negative consequences. However, from that point forward, the relationship between Sally and me would change. Humans have excellent memories and they use their experiences in many ways.
This point of this blog is that life is quite complex and a simple event is not simple. Humans have a lot going on and yet, we try to write about complex events as if they were simple. It’s fun to explore people and characters. Yet, we can never fully capture them.
When It Matters
On the first day of preschool, the teacher said something like, “Today, your education begins. From now on, WHAT YOU DO IS IMPORTANT! Pay attention and learn!” Wow! I better shape up.
In kindergarten, on the first day, the teacher said something like, “All that preschool nonsense did not matter. From now on, you will be graded and have a REPORT CARD! Straighten up and try hard, or you will go to the PRINCIPAL’S OFFICE.” Wow! I better shape up.
In grade school, on the first day, the teacher said something like, “Everything you did before does not matter. From now on, your grades will be in your PERMANENT RECORD! If you fail, have to REPEAT THE FIRST GRADE!” Wow! I better shape up.
In Junior High, on the first day, the teacher said something like, “None of that stuff you did before mattered. From now on, your education will shape your entire future. If you fail, YOUR LIFE WILL BE RUINED!” Wow! I better shape up.
In High School, on the first day, the teacher said something like, “For the first time, your education is truly important. If you want to succeed, you need top grades. If you fail in high school, you will GO NOWHERE IN LIFE!” Wow! I better shape up.
In college, on the first day, the teacher said something like, “Nobody cares what you did before. Study hard, and maybe you will graduate. If you don’t, you will be a COLLEGE DROP OUT!” Wow! I better shape up.
At my first interview, the hiring manager asked something like, “Where did you work before? You do not have any REAL EXPERIENCE! Get back to me after you have at least five years of experience.” Wow! I better find a job.
When I had my daughter, the nurse asked something like, “Is this your first child? NO?!” She shook her head in disapproval. Wow! I better shape up.
When does life begin mattering? Did it ever matter? Here is an example of hard work that should have mattered. At my second job, my company purchased a rival company. My job was to integrate their product into our system. During that time, I got to know the product really well.
One day, upper management scrapped that product line. The original team spent endless hours developing, manufacturing, and servicing their product. All their documents, notes, drawings, and great end product were top-notch. Yet, I tossed boxes of handwritten documents into the trash. Management did even feel the documents were important enough to shred. I thought, “Nothing they did mattered.”
Growing up, kids could get away with anything! Even a major crime could be committed, and it would be impossible to learn about the incident.
As an example, in college, two kids got drunk, and they set a bunch of fires. Three of the fires did severe damage. The kids were expelled, paid a fine, and had to do community service. Three years later, I was walking to class, and I ran into one of them. He told me he applied for a transfer. People forget, which means what they did, did not matter.
Now, the internet keeps a record of everything, and cameras are everywhere. It is easy to do an internet search which means that everything we do (good or bad) matters.
We have come full circle. When will people look at me and say, “Bill. You are finally an adult. Great job!” The answer is simple. It always mattered. Should all those teachers and employers have talked down to me? No, but it is human nature to feel superior.
In conclusion, everything we did, learned, failed and succeeded, molded us into who we are. Experience provides the skills to accomplish what we need to do right now.
And what about this very blog? I have learned more about myself, got new writing skills by creating it, and this blog serves as a marketing tool. This blog was a positive step and hopefully an entertaining step for my four blog readers. IT MATTERED!
In kindergarten, on the first day, the teacher said something like, “All that preschool nonsense did not matter. From now on, you will be graded and have a REPORT CARD! Straighten up and try hard, or you will go to the PRINCIPAL’S OFFICE.” Wow! I better shape up.
In grade school, on the first day, the teacher said something like, “Everything you did before does not matter. From now on, your grades will be in your PERMANENT RECORD! If you fail, have to REPEAT THE FIRST GRADE!” Wow! I better shape up.
In Junior High, on the first day, the teacher said something like, “None of that stuff you did before mattered. From now on, your education will shape your entire future. If you fail, YOUR LIFE WILL BE RUINED!” Wow! I better shape up.
In High School, on the first day, the teacher said something like, “For the first time, your education is truly important. If you want to succeed, you need top grades. If you fail in high school, you will GO NOWHERE IN LIFE!” Wow! I better shape up.
In college, on the first day, the teacher said something like, “Nobody cares what you did before. Study hard, and maybe you will graduate. If you don’t, you will be a COLLEGE DROP OUT!” Wow! I better shape up.
At my first interview, the hiring manager asked something like, “Where did you work before? You do not have any REAL EXPERIENCE! Get back to me after you have at least five years of experience.” Wow! I better find a job.
When I had my daughter, the nurse asked something like, “Is this your first child? NO?!” She shook her head in disapproval. Wow! I better shape up.
When does life begin mattering? Did it ever matter? Here is an example of hard work that should have mattered. At my second job, my company purchased a rival company. My job was to integrate their product into our system. During that time, I got to know the product really well.
One day, upper management scrapped that product line. The original team spent endless hours developing, manufacturing, and servicing their product. All their documents, notes, drawings, and great end product were top-notch. Yet, I tossed boxes of handwritten documents into the trash. Management did even feel the documents were important enough to shred. I thought, “Nothing they did mattered.”
Growing up, kids could get away with anything! Even a major crime could be committed, and it would be impossible to learn about the incident.
As an example, in college, two kids got drunk, and they set a bunch of fires. Three of the fires did severe damage. The kids were expelled, paid a fine, and had to do community service. Three years later, I was walking to class, and I ran into one of them. He told me he applied for a transfer. People forget, which means what they did, did not matter.
Now, the internet keeps a record of everything, and cameras are everywhere. It is easy to do an internet search which means that everything we do (good or bad) matters.
We have come full circle. When will people look at me and say, “Bill. You are finally an adult. Great job!” The answer is simple. It always mattered. Should all those teachers and employers have talked down to me? No, but it is human nature to feel superior.
In conclusion, everything we did, learned, failed and succeeded, molded us into who we are. Experience provides the skills to accomplish what we need to do right now.
And what about this very blog? I have learned more about myself, got new writing skills by creating it, and this blog serves as a marketing tool. This blog was a positive step and hopefully an entertaining step for my four blog readers. IT MATTERED!
Mellowed Out
Several years ago, I left a caustic company. There were countless issues, and my new company felt like a breath of fresh air. Recently, I got in touch with one of the chief troublemakers and was surprised to see positive attitude changes. He was relaxed, calm, and much easier to talk with. What happened?
As we grow older, our attitudes mellow out. This means we do not stress over the little things and take a casual approach to life. As a result, experience, people skills, and wisdom have increased. Plus, we can see retirement in the near future and do not want to stop that from occurring. As a result, my former coworker was much easier to talk to, and we reminisced about old times.
What does mellowing out have to do with writing? Last week, I found a problem with my website and had to reformat the entire site. While making all the changes, I read over a few old blogs. Wow, these early blog entries had a harsh attitude. Bam! Right to the point. Hit those hot topics. No room for error. Yet, the later blogs read more casual and lighthearted. Clearly, my blogs mellowed out and lost their direct focus.
Did I consciously change my focus? I now realize that writing and blogging are supposed to be fun, which differs from trying hard to hook potential readers at all costs.
Is it wrong to mellow out? Should I still be on the cutting edge? Focus is essential, and this blog is indeed supposed to convince blog readers to buy my book. Without this drive, the point is lost. While this is true, I now enjoy blogging much more.
It seems my future blog posts will not be hard-hitting. That means less pressure but less reader interest. Can there be a compromise? One hard-hitting topic a month? Well… I am past the hard-hitting issues because I feel I have covered this ground. However, I still have a few tricks up my sleeve. So stay tuned for future (occasionally) hard-hitting topics.
As we grow older, our attitudes mellow out. This means we do not stress over the little things and take a casual approach to life. As a result, experience, people skills, and wisdom have increased. Plus, we can see retirement in the near future and do not want to stop that from occurring. As a result, my former coworker was much easier to talk to, and we reminisced about old times.
What does mellowing out have to do with writing? Last week, I found a problem with my website and had to reformat the entire site. While making all the changes, I read over a few old blogs. Wow, these early blog entries had a harsh attitude. Bam! Right to the point. Hit those hot topics. No room for error. Yet, the later blogs read more casual and lighthearted. Clearly, my blogs mellowed out and lost their direct focus.
Did I consciously change my focus? I now realize that writing and blogging are supposed to be fun, which differs from trying hard to hook potential readers at all costs.
Is it wrong to mellow out? Should I still be on the cutting edge? Focus is essential, and this blog is indeed supposed to convince blog readers to buy my book. Without this drive, the point is lost. While this is true, I now enjoy blogging much more.
It seems my future blog posts will not be hard-hitting. That means less pressure but less reader interest. Can there be a compromise? One hard-hitting topic a month? Well… I am past the hard-hitting issues because I feel I have covered this ground. However, I still have a few tricks up my sleeve. So stay tuned for future (occasionally) hard-hitting topics.
A Day to Die
Last night, I started watching the movie, A Day to Die, starring Bruce Willis. After ten minutes, I stopped. They loaded this terrible film with plot holes, character flaws, physics mistakes, improper media (public) reactions, and a lack of common sense.
The experience made me want to ask the screenwriter, “Why are you trying to tell this awful story? Aren’t there enough ‘mega cop goes rogue’ stories? Did you show the script to a friend to get their honest reaction? Have you ever spoken to a police officer to understand their job? The police do not issue missile launchers! So what the heck went through the movie executive’s minds? Films still cost money? Right?” I wished I had not wasted those ten minutes.
Yet, there is another perspective. I am a small-time author who does not have a team of advisors. Who selects my book and blog topics? Only me. How do is select a topic? I write stories and blogs of a type that I would like to read.
Therefore, it is logical that the screenwriter of A Day to Die enjoyed unrealistic police movies. However, I think there is more to it. A talented writer will step back and ask themselves, “Is this a good story? Is there some aspect to hook a reader or viewer?” My guess is that many people messed with a good script, resulting in terrible “group results.”
Have I ever made a writing mistake this big? Well… Sort of. For 30 years, I have been thinking about a story. When I started my writing adventure, I planned to make this my fourth book. Actually, I envisioned a big-time movie. However, this project never got off the ground.
The main character (modeled around a “spirited” version of myself) gets rich by exploiting the banking system. Readers would consider this character to be arrogant and selfish. To put it into simple terms, his only positive aspect was intelligence. However, for 30 years, I did not figure this out. Then, one day, I thought about writing priorities and making this story into a book. As I envisioned the entire plot, I realized readers would not like this story. What’s worse is that I would not want to read a book of this type. Bummer!
Why did I think positively about this story for so long? From my perspective, a bold character overcame all odds by making intelligent decisions. So… He uses his mind to get rich, and this mental edge allows him to act like a jerk. Fortunately, I saw the issue before wasting a lot of time.
It is a shame that so many people put effort into A Day to Die. There are so many fantastic stories that they could have worked on. What an excellent non-fiction story to make into a blockbuster movie? Six WWII German prisoners escaped from American prisons. Easy money.
It is super important to take a step back and reevaluate our path. Sometimes we have to make course corrections, firm decisions, or stay the course. Unfortunately, everybody involved in A Day to Die failed to take this critical step. Yet… I read a few positive reviews about this film. Hmm. What were the fans thinking? Perhaps the police secretly issue rocket launchers. But that is a topic for a future blog.
The experience made me want to ask the screenwriter, “Why are you trying to tell this awful story? Aren’t there enough ‘mega cop goes rogue’ stories? Did you show the script to a friend to get their honest reaction? Have you ever spoken to a police officer to understand their job? The police do not issue missile launchers! So what the heck went through the movie executive’s minds? Films still cost money? Right?” I wished I had not wasted those ten minutes.
Yet, there is another perspective. I am a small-time author who does not have a team of advisors. Who selects my book and blog topics? Only me. How do is select a topic? I write stories and blogs of a type that I would like to read.
Therefore, it is logical that the screenwriter of A Day to Die enjoyed unrealistic police movies. However, I think there is more to it. A talented writer will step back and ask themselves, “Is this a good story? Is there some aspect to hook a reader or viewer?” My guess is that many people messed with a good script, resulting in terrible “group results.”
Have I ever made a writing mistake this big? Well… Sort of. For 30 years, I have been thinking about a story. When I started my writing adventure, I planned to make this my fourth book. Actually, I envisioned a big-time movie. However, this project never got off the ground.
The main character (modeled around a “spirited” version of myself) gets rich by exploiting the banking system. Readers would consider this character to be arrogant and selfish. To put it into simple terms, his only positive aspect was intelligence. However, for 30 years, I did not figure this out. Then, one day, I thought about writing priorities and making this story into a book. As I envisioned the entire plot, I realized readers would not like this story. What’s worse is that I would not want to read a book of this type. Bummer!
Why did I think positively about this story for so long? From my perspective, a bold character overcame all odds by making intelligent decisions. So… He uses his mind to get rich, and this mental edge allows him to act like a jerk. Fortunately, I saw the issue before wasting a lot of time.
It is a shame that so many people put effort into A Day to Die. There are so many fantastic stories that they could have worked on. What an excellent non-fiction story to make into a blockbuster movie? Six WWII German prisoners escaped from American prisons. Easy money.
It is super important to take a step back and reevaluate our path. Sometimes we have to make course corrections, firm decisions, or stay the course. Unfortunately, everybody involved in A Day to Die failed to take this critical step. Yet… I read a few positive reviews about this film. Hmm. What were the fans thinking? Perhaps the police secretly issue rocket launchers. But that is a topic for a future blog.
My Greatest Stories
Some people have a life full of adventure, and others have not traveled over 20 miles from where they were born. However, everybody has at least one unforgettable story in their life. In my case, I do not consider myself to have led an adventurous life. I did not serve in the military, choose an exciting career, risk my life or live in a crazy part of the world. Yet, I broke two bones, got into minor car accidents, had stitches three times, been in two life-threatening situations, met fantastic people, and worked on two great projects. My family has had a similar level of adventure.
I thought it would be interesting to describe my top five most interesting/pride-filled/life-experience stories that happened to me or my family. However, I did not want to make my selection a list of “I am better than you” challenges. For example, I was a passenger in a race car with a professional driver. Clearly, describing this exciting experience would be bragging, not the direction I was going for. So here are my top five.
I took SCUBA diving lessons in high school, which became a minor interest. Diving is a dangerous sport, and I ran out of air twice. However, one dive stood out.
My father and I were on the bottom near a kelp bead off San Diego at about 50 feet. We began hearing a strange banging sound. We both thought an enormous ship was passing above us and its massive propeller made the sound. However, we did not see the ship above us or its shadow in the distance. We found it strange that the sand on the seafloor moved during the event, and the fish seemed confused. I looked at my father, and we both shrugged. When we returned, the people on the dock all asked about the earthquake. Wow, we dove during an earthquake.
My father grew up in rural Pennsylvania, and in his college years, he worked at the steel mills during the summer. The inside temperature was staggeringly hot, and to compensate, the managers placed a salt pill dispensing machine at the entrance. Every shift, each worker grabbed a handful and ate them to keep up their electrolytes. In addition, they each carried in a six-pack of beer for refreshments and would frequently visit the drinking fountain. Did the managers frown upon drinking? It was so hot that the alcohol went through the skin and acted like a natural coolant. So, the workers were never drunk. Also, OSHA was not a thing back then.
To make steel wire, enormous hot ingots come from the furnace and are pressed/pulled into long bars. These are then reheated and passed through dies to meet the customer’s size requirements. It takes several steps to make the final product.
My father’s job was to tie up each bundle of wire and then load it on a truck. This was mildly dangerous and not too exciting. The most dangerous job was the person who fed the red-hot wire into the die machine. He needed lightning-quick reflexes to grab the wire with tongs and fling it into the correct location.
The danger came when there was a mistake. The machines did not have modern safety guards or automatic stops. This meant the wire could wrap around the man and burn him to death. Scary. However, there was a perk. If the operator wanted the (paid) day off, he could fling the red-hot wire away (from him), making an enormous mess that would have to be fixed with a team of people with cutting torches. My father witnessed this spectacular event a few times.
The steel plant my father worked for was on the Allegheny River. One of the many items they needed to maintain production was a constant supply of oxygen and acetylene tanks for their cutting torches. At one point, it became apparent that they were losing oxygen tanks, and they assigned a person to investigate. He concealed himself in an air duct above the tank holding area and looked for suspicious activity. A day later, a truck arrived with a new shipment of tanks, and they were unloaded.
The truck drove away, and the supervisor stayed behind. After checking to ensure he was alone, he took an oxygen tank and rolled it over to a bank near the river. He placed the tank at an angle and pointed downriver. Then he used a hammer to smash off the valve. There was a mighty whoosh, and the tank went flying downriver. So yeah, they fired him.
I had a challenging college experience both inside and outside the classroom. Being away from home forced me to grow up quickly, and studying was tough. However, two unforgettable personal achievement moments stand out; both happened the same year.
In my second quarter, I took EE2002 (the second Electrical Engineering class), which was meant to “weed out” non-serious students. There was a 50% failure rate, and at least 25% of the kids took the class a second time. 10% of the kids were taking it for the third time.
Wow, this class was challenging. I spent every waking hour studying, attending teacher’s assistant study sessions, studying with other students, or doing homework. I even had dreams about the subject.
After the final, I was convinced I had failed the class. The professor posted the grades late that night, and my friend and I went to check. He passed. Yay. I was too nervous to check and made him do it. I passed!! The moment was so exciting that I hugged him, which caused him to be quite uncomfortable. To celebrate, I went down to the pond and threw old hard drive platters as far as they would fly.
This was an incredible personal achievement, and three of my friends in the class did not pass. One of them had to take it three times. Side note. They had better math skills, but I wanted it more.
During spring break of that same year, we drove to New York. My roommate Matt (who would be later called Victoria) (that is an entire blog) was into climbing, and he convinced me to tag along. We went to a place called “The Gunks,” which was a popular climbing destination.
https://www.climbing.com/places/the-g...
An outcrop of rocks ranged from 50 to 200 feet high. The advantage was that each section had different difficulty levels, which made it perfect for all climbers.
I had zero climbing experience, and Matt had to show me how to tie knots, set up my gear, and climb. My first job was to watch everybody else and then do finger exercises in the cracks. An hour later, I started climbing for real. The first test was to climb up five feet and let go. This reassured Matt and me that the climbing gear would prevent my fall. My gear held, and I started climbing again. There were many difficulties, and the experience was super challenging. I got stuck once, and he had to climb up (without a harness) and help. Eventually, I made it to the top of the 500foot section. Wow, did the view look fantastic. I had EARNED that view.
That’s it. My five best life stories. Perhaps I should consider myself lucky. I know people who had horrific stories and terrible life experiences. Fortunately, my meager life stories made me what I am. After I finished this blog, I recalled a few more, and perhaps I will blog about them.
I thought it would be interesting to describe my top five most interesting/pride-filled/life-experience stories that happened to me or my family. However, I did not want to make my selection a list of “I am better than you” challenges. For example, I was a passenger in a race car with a professional driver. Clearly, describing this exciting experience would be bragging, not the direction I was going for. So here are my top five.
I took SCUBA diving lessons in high school, which became a minor interest. Diving is a dangerous sport, and I ran out of air twice. However, one dive stood out.
My father and I were on the bottom near a kelp bead off San Diego at about 50 feet. We began hearing a strange banging sound. We both thought an enormous ship was passing above us and its massive propeller made the sound. However, we did not see the ship above us or its shadow in the distance. We found it strange that the sand on the seafloor moved during the event, and the fish seemed confused. I looked at my father, and we both shrugged. When we returned, the people on the dock all asked about the earthquake. Wow, we dove during an earthquake.
My father grew up in rural Pennsylvania, and in his college years, he worked at the steel mills during the summer. The inside temperature was staggeringly hot, and to compensate, the managers placed a salt pill dispensing machine at the entrance. Every shift, each worker grabbed a handful and ate them to keep up their electrolytes. In addition, they each carried in a six-pack of beer for refreshments and would frequently visit the drinking fountain. Did the managers frown upon drinking? It was so hot that the alcohol went through the skin and acted like a natural coolant. So, the workers were never drunk. Also, OSHA was not a thing back then.
To make steel wire, enormous hot ingots come from the furnace and are pressed/pulled into long bars. These are then reheated and passed through dies to meet the customer’s size requirements. It takes several steps to make the final product.
My father’s job was to tie up each bundle of wire and then load it on a truck. This was mildly dangerous and not too exciting. The most dangerous job was the person who fed the red-hot wire into the die machine. He needed lightning-quick reflexes to grab the wire with tongs and fling it into the correct location.
The danger came when there was a mistake. The machines did not have modern safety guards or automatic stops. This meant the wire could wrap around the man and burn him to death. Scary. However, there was a perk. If the operator wanted the (paid) day off, he could fling the red-hot wire away (from him), making an enormous mess that would have to be fixed with a team of people with cutting torches. My father witnessed this spectacular event a few times.
The steel plant my father worked for was on the Allegheny River. One of the many items they needed to maintain production was a constant supply of oxygen and acetylene tanks for their cutting torches. At one point, it became apparent that they were losing oxygen tanks, and they assigned a person to investigate. He concealed himself in an air duct above the tank holding area and looked for suspicious activity. A day later, a truck arrived with a new shipment of tanks, and they were unloaded.
The truck drove away, and the supervisor stayed behind. After checking to ensure he was alone, he took an oxygen tank and rolled it over to a bank near the river. He placed the tank at an angle and pointed downriver. Then he used a hammer to smash off the valve. There was a mighty whoosh, and the tank went flying downriver. So yeah, they fired him.
I had a challenging college experience both inside and outside the classroom. Being away from home forced me to grow up quickly, and studying was tough. However, two unforgettable personal achievement moments stand out; both happened the same year.
In my second quarter, I took EE2002 (the second Electrical Engineering class), which was meant to “weed out” non-serious students. There was a 50% failure rate, and at least 25% of the kids took the class a second time. 10% of the kids were taking it for the third time.
Wow, this class was challenging. I spent every waking hour studying, attending teacher’s assistant study sessions, studying with other students, or doing homework. I even had dreams about the subject.
After the final, I was convinced I had failed the class. The professor posted the grades late that night, and my friend and I went to check. He passed. Yay. I was too nervous to check and made him do it. I passed!! The moment was so exciting that I hugged him, which caused him to be quite uncomfortable. To celebrate, I went down to the pond and threw old hard drive platters as far as they would fly.
This was an incredible personal achievement, and three of my friends in the class did not pass. One of them had to take it three times. Side note. They had better math skills, but I wanted it more.
During spring break of that same year, we drove to New York. My roommate Matt (who would be later called Victoria) (that is an entire blog) was into climbing, and he convinced me to tag along. We went to a place called “The Gunks,” which was a popular climbing destination.
https://www.climbing.com/places/the-g...
An outcrop of rocks ranged from 50 to 200 feet high. The advantage was that each section had different difficulty levels, which made it perfect for all climbers.
I had zero climbing experience, and Matt had to show me how to tie knots, set up my gear, and climb. My first job was to watch everybody else and then do finger exercises in the cracks. An hour later, I started climbing for real. The first test was to climb up five feet and let go. This reassured Matt and me that the climbing gear would prevent my fall. My gear held, and I started climbing again. There were many difficulties, and the experience was super challenging. I got stuck once, and he had to climb up (without a harness) and help. Eventually, I made it to the top of the 500foot section. Wow, did the view look fantastic. I had EARNED that view.
That’s it. My five best life stories. Perhaps I should consider myself lucky. I know people who had horrific stories and terrible life experiences. Fortunately, my meager life stories made me what I am. After I finished this blog, I recalled a few more, and perhaps I will blog about them.
The All-Digital Recording Studio
The year was 1993, and I had graduated from college as an Electrical Engineer. Yay! Unfortunately, the economy was in a significant slump, and engineering jobs for recent graduates were nonexistent. So, I moved to Orange County, where the hot jobs were. Yeah… And ended up making copies at Kinko’s. Blah!
My prospects for the future were grim, and I decided that the only way out was to start a business. I had many ideas but wanted to concentrate on professional audio. This equipment makes records, live performances, and radio stations.
I chose to develop a digital mixing board, a device combining audio from multiple sources. For example, a drum set has six or more microphones that must get combined or “mixed” down to two (stereo) (left and right).
So, my epic quest began. I researched existing technology and then developed block diagrams to show what I wanted to create. With this inadequate preparation, I headed to the bank, explained my idea, and asked them to invest. After all, I had been putting my minimum wage earning from Kinkos there for a year, and surely they would come through with loads of cash. While the loan officer was friendly, I got a quick “no.” Why? It turns out that I needed an investor to fund my company, and banks only provide loans with your collateral. In hindsight, this is obvious, but I was young.
After the shock wore off, I reasserted locating an investor and learned they wanted a business plan. This document would show a potential investor the financial and technical detail so they could quickly see if a new business had potential. So, I went to the bookstore and purchased three books. One of them even came with software! Unfortunately, each poorly written book had radically different approaches. Side note: The software was worthless.
So, I picked out the best nuggets from each book, crafted an approach, and spent three months writing. And… Even I could see my plan was junk. But I had an ace up my sleeve.
My mother had a friend who wrote business plans. Yay! Unfortunately, he saw my desperate plight as an opportunity to shake me down for money. Boo! (Side note: I keep using the word, unfortunately. Authors call this “foreshowing.”) Thankfully, there was good news. My father had a friend, and he took one look at my document, laughed, and identified the problems. Fortunately, he was patient and became my mentor.
For the first time, I laser-focused on a document. Every sentence had a goal, and I treated it like a precious gem interlocked with other gemstones to form the perfect piece of jewelry. Never had I tried so hard to make something perfect.
Unfortunately, the problem that started me down this path still existed. The economy was poor in 1993 and just as bad in 1994. I worked every angle to get my business plan in front of people. The “dot-com bubble” had not started, and nobody wanted to create a new company. I also had another problem I did not understand until years later.
Investors, by definition, are wealthy and do not get rich by making mistakes. My business plan revealed I was a recent college graduate and did not have a team or a working product. These facts made my business a non-starter.
I eventually dropped that project but learned a lot about business, life, people, finances, English, and documents. I had never focused so hard on my words and saw the power of a properly structured sentence. This knowledge and drive became the legacy of my failed effort. I like to think that I got an unofficial MBA and an unofficial degree in technical writing for my efforts. Yay???
This was not the last time I tried to start a business and failed. In total, I made four attempts. The last one was an epic failure, but I thought I had solved the problems because I had dedicated partners, the right plan, and the right idea. What an expensive and glorious mess.
The question remains. Would I change the past? One of my biggest regrets was not getting my master’s degree, and I should have spent the business plan time on this effort. It probably would have been easier. However, I am proud of my failed accomplishment because I can say, “I tried my best and learned a lot.” Painful lessons are often the best.
So, I am glad I attempted to get The All-Digital Recording Studio off the ground. But what about my other three attempts? Those were all mistakes that I wish I could erase. So, if you have a time-traveling DeLorean, please drive it my way and send me back.
You’re the best -Bill
June 21, 2023
Hey book lovers, I published four. Please check them out:
Interviewing Immortality. A dramatic first-person psychological thriller that weaves a tale of intrigue, suspense, and self-confrontation.
Pushed to the Edge of Survival. A drama, romance, and science fiction story about two unlikely people surviving a shipwreck and living with the consequences.
Cable Ties. A slow-burn political thriller that reflects the realities of modern intelligence, law enforcement, department cooperation, and international politics.
Saving Immortality. Continuing in the first-person psychological thriller genre, James Kimble searches for his former captor to answer his life’s questions.
These books are available in soft-cover on Amazon and eBook format everywhere.
My prospects for the future were grim, and I decided that the only way out was to start a business. I had many ideas but wanted to concentrate on professional audio. This equipment makes records, live performances, and radio stations.
I chose to develop a digital mixing board, a device combining audio from multiple sources. For example, a drum set has six or more microphones that must get combined or “mixed” down to two (stereo) (left and right).
So, my epic quest began. I researched existing technology and then developed block diagrams to show what I wanted to create. With this inadequate preparation, I headed to the bank, explained my idea, and asked them to invest. After all, I had been putting my minimum wage earning from Kinkos there for a year, and surely they would come through with loads of cash. While the loan officer was friendly, I got a quick “no.” Why? It turns out that I needed an investor to fund my company, and banks only provide loans with your collateral. In hindsight, this is obvious, but I was young.
After the shock wore off, I reasserted locating an investor and learned they wanted a business plan. This document would show a potential investor the financial and technical detail so they could quickly see if a new business had potential. So, I went to the bookstore and purchased three books. One of them even came with software! Unfortunately, each poorly written book had radically different approaches. Side note: The software was worthless.
So, I picked out the best nuggets from each book, crafted an approach, and spent three months writing. And… Even I could see my plan was junk. But I had an ace up my sleeve.
My mother had a friend who wrote business plans. Yay! Unfortunately, he saw my desperate plight as an opportunity to shake me down for money. Boo! (Side note: I keep using the word, unfortunately. Authors call this “foreshowing.”) Thankfully, there was good news. My father had a friend, and he took one look at my document, laughed, and identified the problems. Fortunately, he was patient and became my mentor.
For the first time, I laser-focused on a document. Every sentence had a goal, and I treated it like a precious gem interlocked with other gemstones to form the perfect piece of jewelry. Never had I tried so hard to make something perfect.
Unfortunately, the problem that started me down this path still existed. The economy was poor in 1993 and just as bad in 1994. I worked every angle to get my business plan in front of people. The “dot-com bubble” had not started, and nobody wanted to create a new company. I also had another problem I did not understand until years later.
Investors, by definition, are wealthy and do not get rich by making mistakes. My business plan revealed I was a recent college graduate and did not have a team or a working product. These facts made my business a non-starter.
I eventually dropped that project but learned a lot about business, life, people, finances, English, and documents. I had never focused so hard on my words and saw the power of a properly structured sentence. This knowledge and drive became the legacy of my failed effort. I like to think that I got an unofficial MBA and an unofficial degree in technical writing for my efforts. Yay???
This was not the last time I tried to start a business and failed. In total, I made four attempts. The last one was an epic failure, but I thought I had solved the problems because I had dedicated partners, the right plan, and the right idea. What an expensive and glorious mess.
The question remains. Would I change the past? One of my biggest regrets was not getting my master’s degree, and I should have spent the business plan time on this effort. It probably would have been easier. However, I am proud of my failed accomplishment because I can say, “I tried my best and learned a lot.” Painful lessons are often the best.
So, I am glad I attempted to get The All-Digital Recording Studio off the ground. But what about my other three attempts? Those were all mistakes that I wish I could erase. So, if you have a time-traveling DeLorean, please drive it my way and send me back.
You’re the best -Bill
June 21, 2023
Hey book lovers, I published four. Please check them out:
Interviewing Immortality. A dramatic first-person psychological thriller that weaves a tale of intrigue, suspense, and self-confrontation.
Pushed to the Edge of Survival. A drama, romance, and science fiction story about two unlikely people surviving a shipwreck and living with the consequences.
Cable Ties. A slow-burn political thriller that reflects the realities of modern intelligence, law enforcement, department cooperation, and international politics.
Saving Immortality. Continuing in the first-person psychological thriller genre, James Kimble searches for his former captor to answer his life’s questions.
These books are available in soft-cover on Amazon and eBook format everywhere.
Thinking Like a Kid
The weather was hot yesterday, and I was rooting through boxes in the attic to locate a pair of binoculars. As I sorted my junk, several trinkets reminded me of days gone past.
I filled one small box with achievement ribbons, and there was a blue one for the science fair experiment. I won first place. Then there was an enormous pile of old homework I should have tossed years ago. Yeah, I still did not throw it out. I am such a packrat…
This trip down memory lane reminded me of what it was like as a kid. I had so much hope, yet I knew nothing about life. I solved all my problems with passion and not logic. Yet I sure thought I knew everything. In fact, I was positive I knew everything.
As I sweated and cursed to myself for not being able to find the binoculars, I began thinking about how much I had grown since writing that homework. Then I saw an old school picture that reminded me of my kindergarten playground.
That environment was rough, fun, confusing, and an enormous learning experience. For example, playing with big bouncy balls taught coordination. Kids solved issues by yelling or fighting. Girls were hard to talk to, no matter what I did.
Yet there were many BIG questions. Why was the adult in charge of the playground so strict? Why were the older kids so mean? Why can’t the younger kids stop following me around? Why does that bully keep taking my lunch money? Why did I get in trouble when the other kid did not? Why do we only get 30 minutes on the playground?
I stopped momentarily to wipe away the sweat and thought, “Well, at least I am an adult now.” Meaning that I know these answers. Right? Adults no longer have playgrounds. We have BATTLEGROUNDS! Tanks, planes, guns, The United Nations, laws, judges, lawyers, talk shows, the internet, banks, and Amazon! We can do anything, and it will always be correct. Why? Because we are adults! And if you dislike it, you will go to your room without supper!
Yet, there is the Ukraine war. Why did it start? Why has it not stopped? What is the difference between now and my playground? Clearly, adults have sage wisdom and solve problems diplomatically.
Well, hold on. Not ALL adults have sage wisdom. Just like kids, we make mistakes too. But we would never think like a bunch of school kids arguing over whose turn it is on the swing. Right?
Now, I had stopped rooting through all my junk and tried to prove that I was indeed better than the younger me. My old homework certainly proved that I was an adult. 2+2=4 I know that now. Check! Yes, I am indeed an adult.
Then I took a moment to invent a circumstance to prove I (and others) was an adult. A man makes a terrible choice resulting in a stolen car. He gets caught and faces trial. There, his lawyer argues against the prosecutor while being mediated by an impartial judge, and a jury decides his punishment. A straightforward and logical process. This is how adults do it, not like a screaming match over a swing.
Yet… Not all trials are just, and the result never satisfies all parties. Take the person who got their car stolen. Does the jury make the car thief drive the victim around until they return their vehicle? No. How is that just or fair?
Want more proof? If the jury declares the defendant guilty, does the judge force the thief to apologize? No. Yet, the kindergarten yard monitor always forced kids to apologize even when they had done nothing wrong.
What does that mean? It means society is not as advanced as we think it is. And the tragic Ukraine war provides the proof. Here is a full summary of the situation. One kid wanted to play on the swing while another was on it. Then, a fight broke out.
Where is the yard monitor to break up the fight? Why don’t lawyers, judges, prosecutors, the police, talk shows hosts, insurance companies, YouTube influencers (I hate that word), banks, and Amazon step in to break up the fight? Not their job? Ha! That’s a cop-out answer. All the people in charge are adults. (Except YouTube influencers. We universally agree they are bratty kids.) It is an adult’s job to act mature and do adult stuff. Yet…
I did not find my binoculars and left the attic loaded with sweat and dust. I felt awful because my homework reminded me that while part of me had developed into an adult, I had a long way to go.
So, I took a shower and then looked in the mirror. “Those grey hairs do not prove maturity.” Yet, sometimes it is fun to think like a kid. Go to the beach and swim in the waves without a care.
As a parent, I do not want to think like a kid. I have responsibilities, and they require solid decisions. Yet, I cannot avoid immaturity. I do not know why I cannot switch off the adolescent part of my mind, and the worst part is that I cannot even tell when it is occurring.
What can I do? Like any dilemma, I can only do my best and try to learn from my mistakes. The problem is that I find myself on that same kindergarten playground when push comes to shove.
You’re the best -Bill
August 02, 2023
I filled one small box with achievement ribbons, and there was a blue one for the science fair experiment. I won first place. Then there was an enormous pile of old homework I should have tossed years ago. Yeah, I still did not throw it out. I am such a packrat…
This trip down memory lane reminded me of what it was like as a kid. I had so much hope, yet I knew nothing about life. I solved all my problems with passion and not logic. Yet I sure thought I knew everything. In fact, I was positive I knew everything.
As I sweated and cursed to myself for not being able to find the binoculars, I began thinking about how much I had grown since writing that homework. Then I saw an old school picture that reminded me of my kindergarten playground.
That environment was rough, fun, confusing, and an enormous learning experience. For example, playing with big bouncy balls taught coordination. Kids solved issues by yelling or fighting. Girls were hard to talk to, no matter what I did.
Yet there were many BIG questions. Why was the adult in charge of the playground so strict? Why were the older kids so mean? Why can’t the younger kids stop following me around? Why does that bully keep taking my lunch money? Why did I get in trouble when the other kid did not? Why do we only get 30 minutes on the playground?
I stopped momentarily to wipe away the sweat and thought, “Well, at least I am an adult now.” Meaning that I know these answers. Right? Adults no longer have playgrounds. We have BATTLEGROUNDS! Tanks, planes, guns, The United Nations, laws, judges, lawyers, talk shows, the internet, banks, and Amazon! We can do anything, and it will always be correct. Why? Because we are adults! And if you dislike it, you will go to your room without supper!
Yet, there is the Ukraine war. Why did it start? Why has it not stopped? What is the difference between now and my playground? Clearly, adults have sage wisdom and solve problems diplomatically.
Well, hold on. Not ALL adults have sage wisdom. Just like kids, we make mistakes too. But we would never think like a bunch of school kids arguing over whose turn it is on the swing. Right?
Now, I had stopped rooting through all my junk and tried to prove that I was indeed better than the younger me. My old homework certainly proved that I was an adult. 2+2=4 I know that now. Check! Yes, I am indeed an adult.
Then I took a moment to invent a circumstance to prove I (and others) was an adult. A man makes a terrible choice resulting in a stolen car. He gets caught and faces trial. There, his lawyer argues against the prosecutor while being mediated by an impartial judge, and a jury decides his punishment. A straightforward and logical process. This is how adults do it, not like a screaming match over a swing.
Yet… Not all trials are just, and the result never satisfies all parties. Take the person who got their car stolen. Does the jury make the car thief drive the victim around until they return their vehicle? No. How is that just or fair?
Want more proof? If the jury declares the defendant guilty, does the judge force the thief to apologize? No. Yet, the kindergarten yard monitor always forced kids to apologize even when they had done nothing wrong.
What does that mean? It means society is not as advanced as we think it is. And the tragic Ukraine war provides the proof. Here is a full summary of the situation. One kid wanted to play on the swing while another was on it. Then, a fight broke out.
Where is the yard monitor to break up the fight? Why don’t lawyers, judges, prosecutors, the police, talk shows hosts, insurance companies, YouTube influencers (I hate that word), banks, and Amazon step in to break up the fight? Not their job? Ha! That’s a cop-out answer. All the people in charge are adults. (Except YouTube influencers. We universally agree they are bratty kids.) It is an adult’s job to act mature and do adult stuff. Yet…
I did not find my binoculars and left the attic loaded with sweat and dust. I felt awful because my homework reminded me that while part of me had developed into an adult, I had a long way to go.
So, I took a shower and then looked in the mirror. “Those grey hairs do not prove maturity.” Yet, sometimes it is fun to think like a kid. Go to the beach and swim in the waves without a care.
As a parent, I do not want to think like a kid. I have responsibilities, and they require solid decisions. Yet, I cannot avoid immaturity. I do not know why I cannot switch off the adolescent part of my mind, and the worst part is that I cannot even tell when it is occurring.
What can I do? Like any dilemma, I can only do my best and try to learn from my mistakes. The problem is that I find myself on that same kindergarten playground when push comes to shove.
You’re the best -Bill
August 02, 2023
Marco Zirino
I attended May Scott Marcy Elementary School in 1976 in San Diego. Was it really that long ago? Seems like only a few years. Education was challenging, plus I was an awkward kid. Fortunately, grade school was a stepping stone, and those lessons (inside and outside the classroom) helped me to become the man I am today.
One of my classmates was a kid named Marco Zirino. We both were interested in electronics and became friends. He was brilliant, and I admit it. Marco knew ten times more about electronics. That is still a tough admission, given how much I was into electronics at the time.
The nearby Junior High (middle school) was called Standly. In the sixth grade, our grade school class took a field trip to Standly (while they were in session). The idea was to introduce us to what middle school was like. Was it adequately supervised and organized? Of course not.
About an hour into the tour, some kid had a problem with me and started a fight. Because the kid was tiny, his punches were utterly ineffective. We both ended up in the principal’s office. The principal knew all about that brat and had somebody escort me to the bus, where I sat awaiting my classmates to conclude their tour.
At the time, the San Diego school district had a magnet program. They bussed kids all over the city to “integrate” (yes, they used that term) races and economic classes. I attended Alexander Graham Bell Junior High because they had computer classes (only one other school in our district had computers at that time).
Bell was far away, and the bus ride was long. Plus, the local kids did not take kindly to the invaders. It was a harrowing experience for an awkward kid like me. However, I knew computers were my future and persisted. Was getting attacked also motivation? It was huge, but thinking super high level, I must give myself credit for leaping computers. Good job, Bill.
Because I went to school across town, I lost touch with everybody from Marcy Elementary. Later, I attended Morse High School across town and went to college out of state.
Since grade school, I ran into two classmates. One, Annie lives a block away, and our daughters became friends. We have had several terrific conversations discussing our childhoods.
When I was about 30, I walked with my friend in Pacific Beach. We had come from a local bar, The Tiki where our other friend, Tim, was a bouncer. I spent every Friday evening at the Tiki doorway for about eight years. I rarely drank, but Tim was a fun guy to talk to, and watching all the Pacific Beach craziness was always entertaining.
Suddenly, somebody yells, “Hey, Bill.” It was one of my classmates from Marcy Elementary, and he recognized me. It turns out that this kid (now a man) had the superpower of recognizing old classmates.
His name was Danny Nicklas, but we called him Froggy. So, we launched into a twenty-minute discussion. Of course, we were guys and talked about the cute girls. Plus, I wanted to know all about attending Standly Junior High and the local University City High School.
It turns out that my decision was far better than I imagined. Both schools had fights and did not stress academics. Fashion, goofing off, drugs, cars, and doing the minimum were all that mattered.
The police arrested one of my University City High School classmates for making fake identifications. And Froggy was still friends with him. Wow, this blew me away.
Our conversation turned to Marco, and I wanted to learn about his wonderful accomplishments. Froggy became sad and told me Marco took a deep dive into drugs. He could not remember if Marco graduated from University City High School. But he ran into him years later on the beach in Santa Monica.
Marco dressed in dirty rags, slurred his words, and rested in the shade. Froggy suspected he was homeless and drug abuse had severely damaged his body.
The news shocked me. I was sure Marco would have been a super-scientist, owner of a mega-corporation, or a revered professor at a massive university. Sadly, no.
This encounter gave me a lot to think about. What would my life have become if I had attended Standly Junior High? Would Marco have dragged me into that dangerous crowd?
My science, math and computer skills would have been lacking at the very least. I probably would not have had the grades or foundation to attend a good college. And my writing? It’s doubtful that I would have the minimum skill or interest to attempt anything.
What if Marco had attended Bell Junior High with me? Would we be best friends today? Bell also had a big drug problem. Was his path set, and there was no avoiding it? Could I have saved him? Is the lesson that hard work pays off? Is the lesson that society should do more for stoners?
The big questions. Is Marco happy being a beach bum? Did he use his superior mind to figure out the correct path in life? Would I be happy if I had followed in his footsteps?
Of course, I do not have the answer to these epic questions, but I know one thing for sure. I miss what my friend used to be.
You’re the best -Bill
September 20, 2023
One of my classmates was a kid named Marco Zirino. We both were interested in electronics and became friends. He was brilliant, and I admit it. Marco knew ten times more about electronics. That is still a tough admission, given how much I was into electronics at the time.
The nearby Junior High (middle school) was called Standly. In the sixth grade, our grade school class took a field trip to Standly (while they were in session). The idea was to introduce us to what middle school was like. Was it adequately supervised and organized? Of course not.
About an hour into the tour, some kid had a problem with me and started a fight. Because the kid was tiny, his punches were utterly ineffective. We both ended up in the principal’s office. The principal knew all about that brat and had somebody escort me to the bus, where I sat awaiting my classmates to conclude their tour.
At the time, the San Diego school district had a magnet program. They bussed kids all over the city to “integrate” (yes, they used that term) races and economic classes. I attended Alexander Graham Bell Junior High because they had computer classes (only one other school in our district had computers at that time).
Bell was far away, and the bus ride was long. Plus, the local kids did not take kindly to the invaders. It was a harrowing experience for an awkward kid like me. However, I knew computers were my future and persisted. Was getting attacked also motivation? It was huge, but thinking super high level, I must give myself credit for leaping computers. Good job, Bill.
Because I went to school across town, I lost touch with everybody from Marcy Elementary. Later, I attended Morse High School across town and went to college out of state.
Since grade school, I ran into two classmates. One, Annie lives a block away, and our daughters became friends. We have had several terrific conversations discussing our childhoods.
When I was about 30, I walked with my friend in Pacific Beach. We had come from a local bar, The Tiki where our other friend, Tim, was a bouncer. I spent every Friday evening at the Tiki doorway for about eight years. I rarely drank, but Tim was a fun guy to talk to, and watching all the Pacific Beach craziness was always entertaining.
Suddenly, somebody yells, “Hey, Bill.” It was one of my classmates from Marcy Elementary, and he recognized me. It turns out that this kid (now a man) had the superpower of recognizing old classmates.
His name was Danny Nicklas, but we called him Froggy. So, we launched into a twenty-minute discussion. Of course, we were guys and talked about the cute girls. Plus, I wanted to know all about attending Standly Junior High and the local University City High School.
It turns out that my decision was far better than I imagined. Both schools had fights and did not stress academics. Fashion, goofing off, drugs, cars, and doing the minimum were all that mattered.
The police arrested one of my University City High School classmates for making fake identifications. And Froggy was still friends with him. Wow, this blew me away.
Our conversation turned to Marco, and I wanted to learn about his wonderful accomplishments. Froggy became sad and told me Marco took a deep dive into drugs. He could not remember if Marco graduated from University City High School. But he ran into him years later on the beach in Santa Monica.
Marco dressed in dirty rags, slurred his words, and rested in the shade. Froggy suspected he was homeless and drug abuse had severely damaged his body.
The news shocked me. I was sure Marco would have been a super-scientist, owner of a mega-corporation, or a revered professor at a massive university. Sadly, no.
This encounter gave me a lot to think about. What would my life have become if I had attended Standly Junior High? Would Marco have dragged me into that dangerous crowd?
My science, math and computer skills would have been lacking at the very least. I probably would not have had the grades or foundation to attend a good college. And my writing? It’s doubtful that I would have the minimum skill or interest to attempt anything.
What if Marco had attended Bell Junior High with me? Would we be best friends today? Bell also had a big drug problem. Was his path set, and there was no avoiding it? Could I have saved him? Is the lesson that hard work pays off? Is the lesson that society should do more for stoners?
The big questions. Is Marco happy being a beach bum? Did he use his superior mind to figure out the correct path in life? Would I be happy if I had followed in his footsteps?
Of course, I do not have the answer to these epic questions, but I know one thing for sure. I miss what my friend used to be.
You’re the best -Bill
September 20, 2023
My Plan for Success
To succeed, a person needs a solid plan, and I had one around the time I turned fifteen. Powerful high school grades would enable me to attend college, leading to a fantastic job. The first two parts were the hardest, but I succeeded. Yay!
The next part was supposed to be easy. I had a college degree, and all I needed to do was look at the help wanted section and pick a job. This would be as easy as giving my best friend a high-five! Well, that was 993, and the economy was awful. So, I radically pivoted and started a company. Even though I worked super hard, my efforts failed.
This was a tough pill to swallow, but I sucked up my pride and got a job at a local medical inventory company. So, my initial plan succeeded. Yay!
Since then, I have bounced from company to company. In my off time, I tried to start businesses three times. My most successful attempt was as a full-time consultant. This effort was incredibly stressful and made little money. My worst attempt was a partnership with an internet marketing company. This dumpster fire consumed hundreds of hours and thousands of dollars.
A friendly bout of unemployment pivoted me again, and I decided to try fiction writing. Surely, this venture would be profitable, and indeed it is. I have made tens of dollars. Yay! (While spending thousands on editing, formatting, and marketing. Boo!)
What is my present success plan? I have a three-pronged approach. Continue working, write at night, and start a business. Working at a company is a safe, straight path with limited risk, but not too exciting. So, how do I intend to be a successful author and start a company?
I have found book promoting to be a tough nut to crack. I had expected online eBook retailers to do a much better job of helping new authors. Sadly, that chore is in my court. And who am I? A nobody author in a sea of nobody authors. However, I have a plan. My books are available in every eBook marketplace, and I write articles to gain exposure. In time, one or more readers will tell others about me. In summary, I plan to sit on my bum and wait to be discovered. Umm, that sounds like a poor plan. Yeah…
I have never stopped my business-starting efforts. I have developed 71 ideas and have organized them by chance of success and investment required. My next step is to locate a partner with marketing skills and investment contacts. Why not do this part myself? My business-starting mistakes taught me two important lessons: Never start alone and CAREFULLY pick your business partners.
How am I finding a business partner? When I meet new people, we chat, and if I get the sense that they are the right person, I tell them about my ideas and discuss a partnership. How often has this occurred in the last ten years? Once. In summary, I plan to sit on my bum and wait for a partner to appear out of thin air. Umm, that sounds like a poor plan and a theme. Yeah…
There are other options. I could go to a book or a business conference. There are online book marketing and business startup courses. At the very least, there are people I can pay to promote my books or locate business partners. That is very true, and I have diligently investigated all these options. Yet, my “solid” plan remains.
Why am I so pessimistic? Am I being lazy? Or am I gun-shy? (Afraid to fail) Until I wrote this sentence, I was sure that I was being cautious. I always approach problems with care and make calculated decisions. This sounds like I have been putting off the problem. Translation: Lazy.
What should I do? The obvious answer is to get off my bum and focus on my goals. I understand what it takes to start a business and am still up for the task, but the problem is desire. Starting a business is risky, scary, and expensive. Having done it so many times without success has taken its mental toll.
After some noodling time, I have concluded that I am indeed gun-shy. Being afraid to try is not an outstanding trait to admit to, but this is clearly what is going on. So here is my new plan. I am going to confront my fears and laziness. However, having lofty goals without milestones or details is not enough. Therefore, I have a new daily goal. I am going to dedicate thirty minutes to starting a business.
What about book marketing? Last night, I came up with a new plan. I have always wanted to write a short stories book. I have collected eight plots and thought them through. The problem is that readers only like short story books by mega-authors. Writing such a book would be a waste of time for a small-potato author like me.
My magic idea is to write one or more short stories and post them online for free. There are TONS of sites that will host a short story. I am excited to see how this plays out.
My business and promotion plans plan do not seem impressive, but what is essential is that I have them clearly stated to myself. Will they succeed? Only time will tell.
You’re the best -Bill
October 18, 2023
The next part was supposed to be easy. I had a college degree, and all I needed to do was look at the help wanted section and pick a job. This would be as easy as giving my best friend a high-five! Well, that was 993, and the economy was awful. So, I radically pivoted and started a company. Even though I worked super hard, my efforts failed.
This was a tough pill to swallow, but I sucked up my pride and got a job at a local medical inventory company. So, my initial plan succeeded. Yay!
Since then, I have bounced from company to company. In my off time, I tried to start businesses three times. My most successful attempt was as a full-time consultant. This effort was incredibly stressful and made little money. My worst attempt was a partnership with an internet marketing company. This dumpster fire consumed hundreds of hours and thousands of dollars.
A friendly bout of unemployment pivoted me again, and I decided to try fiction writing. Surely, this venture would be profitable, and indeed it is. I have made tens of dollars. Yay! (While spending thousands on editing, formatting, and marketing. Boo!)
What is my present success plan? I have a three-pronged approach. Continue working, write at night, and start a business. Working at a company is a safe, straight path with limited risk, but not too exciting. So, how do I intend to be a successful author and start a company?
I have found book promoting to be a tough nut to crack. I had expected online eBook retailers to do a much better job of helping new authors. Sadly, that chore is in my court. And who am I? A nobody author in a sea of nobody authors. However, I have a plan. My books are available in every eBook marketplace, and I write articles to gain exposure. In time, one or more readers will tell others about me. In summary, I plan to sit on my bum and wait to be discovered. Umm, that sounds like a poor plan. Yeah…
I have never stopped my business-starting efforts. I have developed 71 ideas and have organized them by chance of success and investment required. My next step is to locate a partner with marketing skills and investment contacts. Why not do this part myself? My business-starting mistakes taught me two important lessons: Never start alone and CAREFULLY pick your business partners.
How am I finding a business partner? When I meet new people, we chat, and if I get the sense that they are the right person, I tell them about my ideas and discuss a partnership. How often has this occurred in the last ten years? Once. In summary, I plan to sit on my bum and wait for a partner to appear out of thin air. Umm, that sounds like a poor plan and a theme. Yeah…
There are other options. I could go to a book or a business conference. There are online book marketing and business startup courses. At the very least, there are people I can pay to promote my books or locate business partners. That is very true, and I have diligently investigated all these options. Yet, my “solid” plan remains.
Why am I so pessimistic? Am I being lazy? Or am I gun-shy? (Afraid to fail) Until I wrote this sentence, I was sure that I was being cautious. I always approach problems with care and make calculated decisions. This sounds like I have been putting off the problem. Translation: Lazy.
What should I do? The obvious answer is to get off my bum and focus on my goals. I understand what it takes to start a business and am still up for the task, but the problem is desire. Starting a business is risky, scary, and expensive. Having done it so many times without success has taken its mental toll.
After some noodling time, I have concluded that I am indeed gun-shy. Being afraid to try is not an outstanding trait to admit to, but this is clearly what is going on. So here is my new plan. I am going to confront my fears and laziness. However, having lofty goals without milestones or details is not enough. Therefore, I have a new daily goal. I am going to dedicate thirty minutes to starting a business.
What about book marketing? Last night, I came up with a new plan. I have always wanted to write a short stories book. I have collected eight plots and thought them through. The problem is that readers only like short story books by mega-authors. Writing such a book would be a waste of time for a small-potato author like me.
My magic idea is to write one or more short stories and post them online for free. There are TONS of sites that will host a short story. I am excited to see how this plays out.
My business and promotion plans plan do not seem impressive, but what is essential is that I have them clearly stated to myself. Will they succeed? Only time will tell.
You’re the best -Bill
October 18, 2023
The World Changed When I Was Not Looking
I joined Facebook three years ago to promote my books. Why did I wait so long to join social media? I did not see the point of exposing my private life because I did not need to connect with unknown people. Yet, once I was on, I found the experience to be rewarding, and I have met (virtually) many people whom I would have never met without social media. Plus, I connected with old friends, gained resources, and learned a lot.
All seemed to go well until my daughter said, “Nobody uses Facebook except old people.” What? College students started Facebook for college students. It’s about partying and young stuff. Right? Well, no. It is a place for older people to post their ancient achievements and old-timey photographs. Young people have moved on to better social media platforms. What the heck? When did this happen? Where was the news report? Call out the National Guard!
And here is something else. DVDs (Blu-Ray) are no longer a thing. What? Just, yesterday, I was shopping in Target and saw racks of them for sale. New releases, classics, bargains, compilations, and box sets existed. Of course, we all know that CD sales experienced a massive decline in the 2000s, but not DVDs. Right? Physical media is an outdated distribution model, and sales have moved online. Why? Streaming media is more accessible and environmentally friendly.
Alright, those are small potato issues. No big deal. What about the actual issues? I certainly am on top of those. How about homelessness? Millions of Americans are homeless, and every day, there are thousands more. The topic dominates the news and our conversations. I even see homeless people in my neighborhood, and I can say for sure this was not the case five years ago. This problem is getting exponentially worse!
Well… In 2007, the homeless population (according to The Department of Housing and Urban Development) was 647,000 and today it is 553,000. Not “millions?” So, this major problem is getting better? What the heck? Why didn’t somebody tell me?
These three things quietly happened without my awareness. Now, wait a minute. I am a connected person who reads A LOT about what is going on in the world. How did these changes slip under my radar? The answer is that the world changed when I was not looking, and even a connected person like myself cannot be aware of everything.
Growing up, I was aware of significant changes my parents did not fully appreciate. For example, I remember a conversation with my mother. “Soon, computerized cash registers will be in every store. This way, the employees will not have to remember prices.” She said that would never be the case. Why? Computers at the time were thousands of dollars, and only experts could operate them. That is a good guess, but not true.
Have I become like my parents and can no longer see changes? Are there too many? Is the word too complex? Is my perspective skewed? The answer is that the world has always been complicated and in the process of change. Plus, there are many news outlets, and I pay attention to a limited number. For example, I rarely read the local newspaper. In addition, the news might not be aware of the change, and one person can’t know everything.
Is it wrong that the world changed when I was not looking? It took me a while to answer this question. There will always be change, and discovering a change should not cause outrage. What this means is that I need to be more accepting of change, which is the mark of a mature person.
So, I am going to end with the world indeed changed when I was not looking, and that is a good thing. Yet, I am posting this article on my Facebook page…
You’re the best -Bill
October 25, 2023
All seemed to go well until my daughter said, “Nobody uses Facebook except old people.” What? College students started Facebook for college students. It’s about partying and young stuff. Right? Well, no. It is a place for older people to post their ancient achievements and old-timey photographs. Young people have moved on to better social media platforms. What the heck? When did this happen? Where was the news report? Call out the National Guard!
And here is something else. DVDs (Blu-Ray) are no longer a thing. What? Just, yesterday, I was shopping in Target and saw racks of them for sale. New releases, classics, bargains, compilations, and box sets existed. Of course, we all know that CD sales experienced a massive decline in the 2000s, but not DVDs. Right? Physical media is an outdated distribution model, and sales have moved online. Why? Streaming media is more accessible and environmentally friendly.
Alright, those are small potato issues. No big deal. What about the actual issues? I certainly am on top of those. How about homelessness? Millions of Americans are homeless, and every day, there are thousands more. The topic dominates the news and our conversations. I even see homeless people in my neighborhood, and I can say for sure this was not the case five years ago. This problem is getting exponentially worse!
Well… In 2007, the homeless population (according to The Department of Housing and Urban Development) was 647,000 and today it is 553,000. Not “millions?” So, this major problem is getting better? What the heck? Why didn’t somebody tell me?
These three things quietly happened without my awareness. Now, wait a minute. I am a connected person who reads A LOT about what is going on in the world. How did these changes slip under my radar? The answer is that the world changed when I was not looking, and even a connected person like myself cannot be aware of everything.
Growing up, I was aware of significant changes my parents did not fully appreciate. For example, I remember a conversation with my mother. “Soon, computerized cash registers will be in every store. This way, the employees will not have to remember prices.” She said that would never be the case. Why? Computers at the time were thousands of dollars, and only experts could operate them. That is a good guess, but not true.
Have I become like my parents and can no longer see changes? Are there too many? Is the word too complex? Is my perspective skewed? The answer is that the world has always been complicated and in the process of change. Plus, there are many news outlets, and I pay attention to a limited number. For example, I rarely read the local newspaper. In addition, the news might not be aware of the change, and one person can’t know everything.
Is it wrong that the world changed when I was not looking? It took me a while to answer this question. There will always be change, and discovering a change should not cause outrage. What this means is that I need to be more accepting of change, which is the mark of a mature person.
So, I am going to end with the world indeed changed when I was not looking, and that is a good thing. Yet, I am posting this article on my Facebook page…
You’re the best -Bill
October 25, 2023
