Carly Findlay's Blog, page 3

Neuropathy post chemotherapy = Carpal Tunnel Syndrome

An update on my neuropathy:

Neuropathy in my hands has continued since November, post chemotherapy. It’s especially painful at night when I get constant pins and needles – even with meds which have improved it significantly.

I had some tests done by a Neurophysician at the RMH last week. They were little shocks on my hands and wrists – feeling like an electric shock from the trampoline. As I left, she quickly told me it’s likely I have Carpal Tunnel Syndrome, which can be common, related to nerve damage from chemotherapy.

There’s a graduated approach to treatment – for now I am on meds and I have hand splints (they’re much like my skating wrist guards – pink too!). Steroid injections and surgery are a long way off.

I had a great chat with my GP yesterday. The Neurophysician‘s tests confirmed I have early stage, mild carpal tunnel syndrome, as a side effect of chemotherapy.

I bumped into a friend in the waiting room at the RMH – she told me the tests would be “straightforward but uncomfortable” (true!), and the Neurophysician and I had a great chat as the tests were quite long.

Lots of people I know have told me about their Carpal Tunnel and neuropathy – after chemo and during pregnancy. It’s a large club, fortunately relief seems possible.

Cancer, hey?! Every day there’s something new and unexpected! At least I no longer get my period.

Image: navy and orange signs at the RMH. They read “Clinical Neurophysiology
EEG, EMG, Evoked Potentials, Vestibular Studies”
And
“Neuroscience Clinical Trials
MELBOURNE BRAIN CENTRE”. Green cabinets are on the wall next to the signs.

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Life changes quickly

Next week marks a year since I went overseas with my Mum. We went to South Africa and France on a research/influencer holiday. 

It was life changing and I am currently focusing on writing up what I learnt in South Africa, and picking up work with the brand where I left off. 

The anniversary of the trip holds many emotions – brilliant memories of meeting my family and learning what my Mum’s life was like in Apartheid South Africa; doing touristy things like safaris; talking with artists; and reflecting on how Mum’s (and Dad’s) life has changed in the 44 years since they came to Australia. We also had a glamorous time in France, at a thermal springs hydrotherapy centre. 

But I had cancer symptoms every day – and I didn’t know it. I just got on with it. I think about the food I left on my plate as I got full too quickly, and the constant running to the toilet several times a day, and when I spoke to a doctor who suggested I had dysentery. I think about the time I tried on a dress in Johannesburg and noticed how small my boobs had become. And then the flight home – when my stomach was so swollen and pained. 

When I touched down in Melbourne after seven and a half weeks, I planned to log onto work from home. Instead, I went straight to bed and saw a doctor later that day – who sent me to the hospital. 

From the day I got home, the rest of my year became about cancer. Maybe cancer 24 hours after arriving back in Melbourne, and confirmed cancer a month later.  It all happened so quickly. 

It’s only now that I’m cancer free, and processing all that happened last year. When I was going through it, it was just one foot in front of the other, one thing at a time.

I am feeling stronger thanks to a great diet, regular exercise and no more treatment.  I had to weigh myself a lot last year – twice a week sometimes. I hadn’t weighed myself in years prior. I weighed myself the other day, and I’m the heaviest I’ve been in almost a year. A dress got stuck over my boobs when I tried it on last week! These little things are progress – I’m feeling more like myself every day. 

I’ll go gently next week, and in the coming months. 

How quick life can change. 

Image: Carly, a woman with red skin and short dark curly hair, wearing a yellow dress with sunflowers – some are tied in bunches with pink ribbon. A pink bow belt is tied around her waist. Shes got hot pink boots on. She’s standing in front of a dark green wall, smiling.

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Breaking Barriers speech

Today I speak on Wurundjeri and Boon Wurrung lands, in the Eastern Kulin Nations. I pay my respects to First Nations elders, past and present, and I extend my friendship to any First Nations people in the room today. Thank you to Murrundindi for the incredibly beautiful Welcome to Country. 

As a writer and arts worker who is a guest on this land, I want to give shoutouts to disabled First Nations writers and artists – Paola Bella, Renay Barker Mulholland, Josh Pether, and Kitty Obsidian are all Disabled First Nations artists living and working locally. Seek out their work and celebrate them. 

I love Melbourne and it’s so good to be here at a City of Melbourne event. 

Your attendance today is heartening. You are all keen on making your workplaces, venues, restaurants shops and spaces accessible. Thank you. 

Something me and other disabled people notice a lot is that people who run shops, restaurants, arts venues and more say:

“We don’t get many disabled customers coming here.”

To that I say: 

One: disability doesn’t have a specific appearance – how do you know if someone is disabled or not?

And two: perhaps if you made your premises and your attitudes more accessible, you’d get more disabled customers, and employees too. 

Disability is broad. It encompasses physical disability, diverse mental health, sensory impairments like Deafness and blindness, cognitive disability, neurodivergency, chronic illness, and dynamic disability – that is, conditions that change in severity from one day to another. And external barriers including ableism, and sometimes our bodies, are disabling. I’ll talk you through examples of ableism, and ways to be less ableist and more accessible and inclusive in my speech. 

The Australian Trade and Investment Commission (AusTrade) says that:

“The Australian Institute of Health and Welfare’s People with disability in Australiareport (2024) found:

18% of Australians, or 4.4 million people, have a disability22%, or 5.5 million, have a long-term health condition.

In the June quarter 2023 alone, Tourism Research Australia estimates the total value of domestic travel by people with accessibility needs and people who travelled with them was $6.8 billion. This represents 21% of total domestic tourism spend in that quarter. 

Making products or services more accessible opens new and valuable markets for tourism businesses.”

If you follow me online, you probably know that I love fashion and I do a lot of shopping. I’m regularly in clothing shops and something that annoys me is when new stores (and restaurants )  move in to a premises, and are not accessible – that is, inaccessible doorway, tiny change rooms without support rails, high counters and displays, loud music, bright lights and racks and shelves positioned so that it’s hard to navigate around them. 

The store had an opportunity make the space accessible from the outset and chose not to. This is ableism.

And retailers aren’t much better online, either – they dont provide much detail about the clothes on store websites and social media, so people who are blind or have low vision or have other types of disabilities don’t know what they look like, how they fit. 

There are many resources on making spaces accessible online – the City of Melbourne has a great set of accessibility checklists and guides for businesses on its website.

I’d love to see the City of Melbourne and other councils give incentives for businesses including retailers (and restauranteurs and venue managers etc) to make their new premises accessible, and fines issued to those who dont within a year of moving in. 

Accessibility isn’t only physical. It’s attitudinal too. And a poor attitude towards disability is also ableism. Similar to Elle, I have a huge amount of stories to share, about the ableism and inclusion I’ve encountered. Here’s just one story.

A few years ago, a friend and I saw prominent Australian band, Killing Heidi, at a prestigious melbourne music venue. I’m naming the band but not the venue, because the band responded, and the venue didn’t. My friend and I both have facial differences, and one of our safe spaces is in a music venue, watching our fave bands. Because of my skin condition, Ichthyosis, it can hurt for me to stand for an extended period of time. My friend secured me a chair as I got us a drink. And then we were verbally abused and threatened by drunk concert goers. They said I was too young to need a chair and threatened violence. 

We were shaken and scared and we moved away from these abusive people. We spoke to the venue staff about what happened – they just passed us to other staff, as they didn’t know what to do. In fairness they did walk us out of the venue, to ensure we didn’t encounter the abusive people after the show. 

I tweeted about it, and it made the news in my hometown of Albury Wodonga. 

Killing Heidi reached out and apologised, even though it wasn’t their responsibility, invited us to their next show later in the month, and we hung with the band prior to seeing them play.  

We didn’t hear from the venue staff at all. But six months later I needed to do a talk at the venue, and I had to speak about what happened with management in a public space – where it was moderated. I was polite and professional but frustrated that this was the only opportunity for me to raise this, in front of an audience. 

Here’s what I wanted to happen. 

For there to be a way to report ableism to the venue staff at the time, like a text helpline for reporting unwanted behaviour. And for there to be a way to report this after the concert.

For staff to recognise what ableism looks like. If people don’t know what ableism is, it means they’re not around disabled people enough, seeing the barriers we face. Coming to recognise ableism could happen by staff undertaking accessibility and disability cultural safety training, and following lots of disabled people on social media

For ableist patrons to be removed from the venue in the same way racism and sexist people are.

For venue management to contact me and my friend afterwards, apologise and ensure a safe space so this doesn’t happen again.

Hilariously after the first Killing Heidi show, another drunk person stopped my friend and I in the street to call me a social justice angel, loudly thanking me for my advocacy and requesting a selfie. My friend regularly calls me a social justice angel now. 

A couple of years later, I went to  that same music  venue with  another friend – also disabled – and she was told to stop resting on the stage to ease her chronic pain after the show, after most people had cleared out of the band room because it was an OHS risk. Again, management did not respond when I wrote to them to report what had happened. 

Access and inclusion also extends to workplaces. 

I’m running out of time here but I want to give a shout-out to my part time employer, Melbourne Fringe, who sets a great example of making the workplace accessible – from the outset. Some of my colleagues are here today, including Simon Abrahams, CEO and Creative Director, and Caroline Bowditch, our incredible cultural consultant.

Here’s what we do at Melbourne Fringe:

There are targeted positions for Deaf, Disabled, Neurodivergent and chronically ill people, and of course, disabled people can apply for all roles too. 

We have multiple ways to apply for jobs – written responses online, via video, Auslan video, audio file, or relaying their application to us on the phone if needed. Artists applying for commissions also have these options.

We ask candidates what their access needs are several times in the application process – and many have told me they are thankful for us asking because previous employers haven’t asked. 

And we make sure the workplace is accessible, with flexible work days and hours, work from home options, different leave options, and regular disability cultural competency training and discussions. 

In my seven years of working at Melbourne Fringe, I’ve never had to leave my identity at the door. And last year when I was diagnosed with cancer, which was hard to endure on top of my primary disability, Ichthyosis, I was able to focus on healing while the whole workplace kept up the access and inclusion work for the Festival and wider arts sector. Simon and the team would check in on me regularly, inviting me to lunch and Festival events, with no pressure except to have fun.

Accessibility and inclusion is about making disabled, Deaf, neurodivergent and chronically ill people welcome and showing us that we belong. 

It’s about building trust.

It’s about affording dignity and independence to disabled people. 

It’s about using respectful language and raising your expectations of disabled people.

It’s about ensuring disabled people are in every room, when decisions are made about us. 

We are almost 20 percent of the population, probably more given non disclosure rates. 

It’s good business sense to invite us in. 

Thank you.

Image: Carly, a woman with red skin, wearing a blue jacket over a blue, purple, green and navy floral dress, pink boots. She’s standing near a wooden wall, smiling.

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If you want to book me to speak, contact my agent.

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Neurodiversity Celebration Week

It’s neurodiversity celebration week! I am Neurodivergent. 

I have a partial ADHD diagnosis. It’s partial (or provisional) because it costs a lot of money to get an assessment for a full diagnosis, and getting that assessment was marred by a more urgent diagnosis and treatment. 

In 2022 we moved house, and a friend with ADHD helped us. Our friend asked me if I was Neurodivergent, and I said I don’t think so. He said he saw the way I was competing tasks – or not – moving things from one pile to another. And then I discussed it with my Mum, and some other ND friends who agreed with my first friend.  

In 2023, I had a mental health plan and was seeing a psychologist for a year,. This was due to the severe and relentless bullying I (still) receive online. The psych asked me what else I want to discuss, and I said I recognise traits of ADHD in myself. I took a provisional test. She suggested I see a psychiatrist for a formal test. 

I got a GP referral to a psychiatrist at the start of 2024.

Mum encouraged me to get assessed for ADHD when I got back from overseas, but being diagnosed with and treated for cancer was prioritised.  I haven’t proceeded – which is very ADHD of me. But I have mentioned it to the cancer psychologist, and she has confirmed traits in me. 

The more I talk to and learn from ND people, the more I see ND traits in myself. Social media has been great for that recognition and relatability, as have ND friends. I am glad that it has been such a focus in the media’s. And I’ve learned that a partial diagnosis counts. Self diagnosis counts, especially when the diagnosis process is so expensive.

What traits did I see in myself?

I put off tasks. My mind is always racing, I have about 100 tabs open. I am really fidgety and can’t sit still – and I’m not sure if that’s more related to alleviating the discomfort of my ichthyosis. I concentrate best when I’m doing something else – like folding napkins or doodling. I can be an impulsive shopper. Noise can overstimulate me, especially since I’ve been working from home. I find it hard to relax. I’ve got a lot of abandoned hobbies and projects. I have trouble getting started. I am really untidy. I am not interested in paying attention  to or doing tasks I don’t enjoy or am not good at. I have a great sense of justice sensitivity – where I often want to make things right, and I work hard at advocating for change, very reactively. 

I don’t talk much about my neurodivergence, as I’m still learning. And I appreciate that so many more people have done the work before me. Plus, I’m sure I’m going to get “not another woman in her 40s with ADHD”. I held off on mentioning anything due to that severe bullying I mentioned. And I worried I was taking up space where I didn’t belong, because I don’t have a formal diagnosis.  

But I am sharing now because I’ve been pretty vulnerable this year. I’m sharing because this is a safe space. I’m sharing because there’s no shame in being Neurodivergent and having multiple diagnoses – even those that are half complete. I am also grateful for social media where I can see myself in so many others who have shared their experiences online. 

For me, ADHD isn’t a deficit, or a super power. It is an explanation. It just is. Just like Ichthyosis, just like cancer.

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What gifts should you give a friend who’s having cancer treatment?

I regularly see questions about what to get a friend who is going through cancer treatment. Here’s what helped me as I underwent surgery, chemotherapy, radiotherapy and various tests in 2024.

Meal vouchers – UberEats, DoorDash, MenuLog were great. Dinner Ladies vouchers were fabulous for homestyle meals.Laundry service vouchers. I do a lot of washing due to my skin, so having someone else take the load off was so helpful. See also dog walking, babysitting, house cleaners, taxi services, gardening services.Home cooked meals. Friends dropped cake, spaghetti bolognaise and soup around. Adam and I were so appreciative. But check with your friend about whether there’s anything they can’t eat, or are having trouble eating, as chemotherapy may limit what they can and feel like eating.A bag of groceries. Some friends came to pick me up for lunch one day, and they brought a bag of groceries for me. They included fruit, easy meals like dahl and curry that I could just add water to, dried fruit (great for chemo poo) and a few other treats. So thoughtful.Chemist vouchers. I spend a lot on meds each month, and a chemist voucher helped while I wasn’t working.Your time. Friends coming to chemo and other hospital appointments with me were so welcome. Passing the time with friends made the appointments so much more bearable. We laughed, we ate snacks. They helped me open my drinks. They held my hand while I had needles. Helping around the house was also very welcome, as well as trips out to lunch and walks too. I have fond memories of a work colleague visiting and doing my dishes, and we had a tea and cut out hexagons for a quilt.Fidget toys. These helped keep my hands and mind busy.Nice tea. Peppermint was great, so was tummy tea.Heated blanket, hot pack, crochet blanket. It’s always good to use while sitting on the couch or in bed.Pretty scarves and hats. Check if your friend is irritated by any fabrics first.MooGoo creams (they do a cancer pack) and Avène water spray.

And if you cannot afford to spend anything, a list of fun lighthearted things to watch, read and listen to; a handmade artwork or hat is also wonderful.

Note: these are useful for other diagnoses and recoveries too.

Image: carly in hospital, sitting in a chair having chemo. She’s dressed colourfully and a colourful blanket is over her. A towel covers her arm where the drip and cannula gives the chemotherapy. Text reads: “what are some gifts to give your friend who’s having cancer treatment?”

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When parents grieve their disabled child.

Content warning: ableism, suicide, death

This is from the audiobook of a chapter of my memoir, Say Hello – the chapter is called “Grief (and hope)”. It’s a long piece of audio, but please stick with it, and share.

It’s about the impact of parental grief on me and other disabled people. I thank the people who allowed me to quote them, Caroline, Deborah, Ally and Rebekah; and of course I am thankful for the work of the many disabled people I mention in the chapter (and beyond the book). I’m passionate about amplifying & prioritising disabled voices.

I guarantee you, a disabled woman speaking out about her grief – or pride – about being disabled, and the impact of receiving a diagnosis (albeit met with relief or sadness or both) would not receive the attention and praise that a male parent of a disabled child gets when speaking out about the grief for their disabled child.

Often non disabled parents of disabled kids are prioritised in the media, often talking about grieving their disabled kids.If me speaking out about this issue makes you uncomfortable- good. That’s my intention. Sit with it. Read other pieces by me on this topic: on vicarious trauma; and parents over-sharing their disabled kids online. Read from other disabled people too. It’s imperative if you want to be an ally.

You can purchase Say Hello at bookstores and online. It’s available in paperback, ebook, audiobook (read by me here) and large print on demand – in Australia and world wide. It can be borrowed from Australian libraries.

Apology: when Say Hello was published in 2019, I mentioned two people in this chapter who have since transitioned. Their names are now Yenn Purkis and Fin Leary. I apologise that their previous names are in the paperback, ebook and audiobook recording. I also used the term “finding my tribe” which I acknowledge is problematic. In hindsight, I should have written “finding my community.”

Making this recording took a long time – especially captions. If this post has helped you be a better ally, or you will use it in your work, please consider buying me a drink – PayPal.me/CarlyFindlay. Thank you.

Video: a screen recording of Say Hello audiobook – featuring a woman with red face and short dark curly hair, smiling. She’s wearing a pink floral top and bright orange skirt. Her hand is on her hip. Curly orange text reads “Say Hello”, and black text reads “Carly Findlay
How I became the fangirl of my own story – a memoir and manifesto on difference, acceptance, self love and belief”. Below it is a pink speech bubble with black captions – the captions are the audio.

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Even if you’re curious, just don’t ask

I’ve made a handy video in case you see someone with a skin condition or a disability – because I was rudely interrupted by a stranger after a great Pilates class this morning. You’re welcome.

Video: Carly, a woman with red skin and short dark curly hair, wearing a Hello Kitty dress, speaking to camera against a white wall. The video has captions – white text on purple, above Carly. Transcript: “If we’ve never met or spoken before, “so, is yours eczema?” is not an appropriate greeting ever.

Even if you’re curious.
Even if your son has eczema.
Even if you’re worried about someone’s health.
Even if we’ve just done the same Pilates class.
Just don’t.

Just say hello.

Ask or say things like:
“How are you?
Did you enjoy the class?
I like our outfit.
What’s on for the rest of the day?
My name is Carly, what’s yours?
See you next class.”

There’s no need to ask about someone’s appearance or body or medical condition or mobility device, especially if that’s the way you’re starting a conversation.
It makes for a very awkward conversation.

It may be the first time you’ve seen someone like me, but it’s definitely not the first time I’ve been asked about my appearance.

I’m not offended: I’m not being defensive. I’m just annoyed and surprised that in 2025, people still feel entitled to a stranger’s medical diagnosis.”

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Ichthyosis, cancer and Rare Disease Day

Today (28 February) is Rare Disease Day.

I have a type of Ichthyosis called Netherton’s Syndrome, which is a rare genetic skin condition. (For less confusion, I will refer to it as Ichthyosis.)

I was born with it. It means my skin is red, scaly, inflamed and prone to pain and infection. My body doesn’t regulate its temperature, my eyes don’t lubricate well, and my hair is brittle.

It’s medically challenging, but the social challenges are the hardest. I regularly experience stares, comments, questions, assumptions, taunts, fear, exclusion and discrimination.

I know many people with different types of ichthyosis, including Netherton’s Syndrome. Sometimes doctors connect me with families of newborns with ichthyosis and it’s a privilege and pleasure to provide them with guidance and friendship, and see the little ones grow and thrive. And of course I have lots of adult friends with ichthyosis.

An interesting fact about ichthyosis, especially Netherton’s and Harlequin, is that the genetic makeup means that people with the condition often look more like each other than they do their family members. So when I meet another person with ichthyosis, they look like family. And our shared experiences make them feel like family, too.

Going through ovarian and endometrial cancer diagnosis and treatment last year was hard, because of ichthyosis. I spent a lot of time educating gynaecologists, surgeons, nurses and oncologists about ichthyosis, because it’s not common. I looped my dermatologists into communication, especially when I got very sick from the chemo. I made my cancer experience public because there was no info about how ichthyosis interacts with cancer, cancer treatment and menopause at the time I was diagnosed, and I didn’t want the next person with ichthyosis who was diagnosed with cancer to feel as alone and uninformed as me. I know everyone’s experiences are different, but if one part of my story helps one person, then I’ve done my job.

Chemo was the hardest on my skin, and radiotherapy was surprisingly ok. Losing my hair was the easiest part, as I had a lifetime of looking different already to prepare me.

Happy Rare Disease Day. You’re not alone.

Image: Carly, a woman with red skin, wearing a floral shirt over a floral dress, and a pink hat, she’s standing in greenery, smiling. A rare disease day logo is in the top left.

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My thoughts on Apple Cider Vinegar – Netflix

I’ve been watching Apple Cider Vinegar – the Netflix series based on Belle Gibson’s life. It’s billed as a true story based on a lie”.

The series comes off the back of the book investigating Belle Gibson – The Woman who Fooled the World by two Age Journalists – Beau Donnelly and Nick Toscano. (They talk about the investigation here.)

Image: Apple Cider Vinegar poster from Netflix

Belle Gibson faked having cancer to build an online profile, and received a book deal  for The Whole Pantry and an app deal with Apple Watch.she claimed to have cured her cancer by eating whole foods alone, rejecting traditional medicine. She stole a lot of money from fundraisers and fooled a lot of cancer patients into following a similar regime to her. She lived a very glamorous life with the money she made and stole. Ten years on and she hasn’t faced any charges for her fraudulent behaviour or paid the money back. 

The series is so good. And it’s uncomfortable viewing at times. The lengths Belle Gibson went to deceive so many people – cancer patients and their families, publishers, Apple, her followers… disgraceful. She’s shown zero accountability.

It is the first show in a long time that I was compelled to watch and take in without looking at a second screen, and I haven’t stopped thinking about it or talking about it in the week since I finished watching. And everyone is talking about it.

The show was cast perfectly. Catherine McClements and Debra Lawrence popped up as familiar faces.

Kaitlyn Dever, who is an American actor, nailed the Aussie accent. She transformed into Belle seamlessly, down to the dental veneers.

Image: Kaitlyn Dever as Belle Gibson – a white woman wearing a pink roll neck sweater. Kaitlyn/Belle is a white woman.

My favourite, Callan Mulvey is in the show – for one episode. He plays a really dodgy “doctor” – the kind who prescribes snake oil.  It’s so strange seeing an actor I’ve admired for so long playing a character that behaves with such dangerous views.  

Another favourite, Aisha Dee, plays Chanelle, a whistleblowing friend who dobbed Belle in to the journalists.

Image: Aisha Dee at the Netflix premiere of Apple Cider Vinegar – Aisha is a woman of colour.

And I loved the dialogue, and also the look of the show. The soundtrack was great too. It was so interesting  how the fourth wall was broken in most episodes, with the characters reassuring the viewer that Belle Gibson was not paid for this series. I also liked that Belle’s child was never named – he was referred to as Bubby. I really hope Belle’s son is ok.

It’s been hard to watch as a cancer patient. Traditional medicine based treatment for me was really hard – my skin was the worst it’d ever been and my mental health was very low. Chemo especially. I can see how people choose alternative therapies. And I can see how easy it would be to fall for snake oil merchants, when you’re so desperate to survive. 

As a disabled person, I am angered by Belle’s behaviour . Disabled people are so often targeted by charlatans claiming to have a cure for disability- think essential oils, mystery tablets and even faith healers. We are often sold under the multilevel marketing pyramid. I’m a snakeoil salesman patient – my parents were both seeking a cure, and targeted when I was little. I drank Percy’s Powder – a brown slurry that tasted like muddy water; tried Chinese herbs and naturopathic medicine; and drank mangosteen juice. Still have Ichthyosis.   

There was a scene in the show that depicted disability as tragedy, a warning of choosing traditional medicine and amputation over alternative medicine. How great it would be to see more disabled role models depicted to aid this decision making.   

As a blogger, I’m enthralled watching this series. I love any media about blogging – this series is so well done. I remember that time when Belle Gibson was exposed well. I never met her, but knew some people who had worked with her or enjoyed her posts.

I still abide by the health blogging values that I wrote 10 years ago, when Belle was in the media. I don’t give medical advice. I state that this is my experience only. Most recently, I made a decision  not to name the chemo drugs I had because I didn’t want anyone who would potentially be prescribed them  being influenced by my experiences. I told my oncologist this, referencing Elle MacPherson and Belle Gibson, and she said that’s a wise and ethical idea. I’m aware of the following and influence I have. It’s one thing to influence someone into buying a brooch or trying to wear more colour, and it’s a whole ‘nother (dangerous) thing to suggest people don’t try a certain cancer drug because I found it hard.

Many years ago, I won a blogging award sponsored by an insurance company. Another winner was Jess Ainscough, a wellness blogger, who died from cancer after “treating” it with alternative therapies. She blogged about her wellness journey.  At the time, I profiled the other winners on my blog, and Jess was the only one who I didn’t hear back from. The character Milla in Apple Cider Vinegar is based on Jess. (Jess’s dad has since slammed the show, saying that the depiction of Jess was offensive.)

My only criticisms of the show is that I wanted to see more of the infamous 60 Minutes interview, and that the show seemed to end quite quickly – maybe leaving room for a second series, detailing her rather secret life since she was exposed? Maybe she will pay the money back?

I highly recommend Apple Cider Vinegar on Netflix. I worry the wellness industry hasn’t changed a lot, and vulnerable people are being taken advantage of through multilevel marketing orgs like that “miracle” water filter company, and essential oils  – especially disabled people and young mums like Belle was. There’s so much misinformation about health online – it’s not regulated.

I still see people I know get tangled in this web – it’s alarming! As I’ve written above, and previously, I’ve personally been recommended all sorts of snake oil “cures” for my ichthyosis – the ableism in the wellness industry is insidious. The AI word salads, the promises of financial freedom and clean health – it’s all dazzling until the coffee enema poisons you. 

Apple Cider Vinegar is on Netflix now.

Has this post helped you or made you think? Please consider buying me a drink. Thank you.

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All Aboard the Feelings Express and The Confidence Code: A Little Book About Courage”- Kids books on confidence and feelings by Ashley Ellis-Smith

One of my friends and colleagues, Ashley Ellis-Smith, is a social worker, as well as a writer and illustrator. She’s also neurodivergent, and specialises in working with neurodivergent children. 

She has just written and illustrated two kids books while on maternity leave – superwoman! The books are about exploring feelings and developing confidence, suitable for kids aged 4-8. 

They’re called “All Aboard the Feelings Express” and “The Confidence Code: A Little Book About Courage”

All Aboard the Feelings Express

“Leo receives a magical golden ticket for a journey on the Feelings Express, a special train that explores different emotions. Guided by Ollie the Owl, the wise and friendly conductor, Leo visits several stations, each representing a different feeling.”

Buy All Aboard the Feelings Express

The Confidence Code: A Little Book About Courage

“Maya is a quiet girl with a big love for computers and coding. In the comfort of her bedroom, surrounded by her favourite gadgets, she feels safe. But when her teacher announces a school presentation, Maya’s world turns upside down. The idea of speaking in front of her classmates fills her with anxiety, making her wish she could disappear.”

Buy The Confidence Code

Right now they’re available in paperback from Amazon – links above. 

I haven’t been paid for this post, just helping out a mate whose work I believe in and think will benefit others. 

Find Ashley on LinkedIn, BlueThimb, Threads and BitLy.

Images: two book covers side by side. 

Left: “All Aboard The Feelings Express!”

• The cover features a cheerful young boy with brown hair, rosy cheeks, and a bright smile, standing at a train station. He is wearing an orange sweater with a white collar and waving enthusiastically while holding a golden ticket in one hand. Behind him, a blue train is parked at the platform, and a large clock with a purple face is visible, indicating the time. The title is displayed in a playful mix of orange and white fonts, with “All Aboard” in orange and “The Feelings Express!” in a white cursive font. The author’s name, “By Ashley Ellis-Smith,” is in a blue oval at the bottom of the cover.

Right: “The Confidence Code”

• The cover features a confident young girl with dark skin, big expressive eyes, and black hair styled in two puffy buns. She stands with her hands on her hips, wearing a black and white sports outfit and sneakers, exuding strength and determination. The background is a futuristic, neon-lit cityscape with glowing purple and blue lights, digital circuit patterns, and buildings with illuminated windows. The title, “The Confidence Code,” is displayed in large, bold, pink digital-style text, arranged in three blocks. The author’s name, “By Ashley Ellis-Smith,” appears in pink at the bottom of the cover.

Each book cover is also repeated below the book title and above the book blurb – image descriptions of the covers as above.

The post All Aboard the Feelings Express and The Confidence Code: A Little Book About Courage”- Kids books on confidence and feelings by Ashley Ellis-Smith first appeared on Carly Findlay.