Page Turner's Blog, page 8

I Have an “I Might Get My Heart Broken, But This Is Worth the Risk” Mode

I have this other mode. One that goes, "I might get my heart broken, but this is worth the risk." It doesn't happen very often at all. Has only happened a couple of times in my life. But when that happens, I get really calm.

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It Can Be Hard to Feel Sexy When Your Body Betrays You

I'm tired of this entire pattern. I think it's time to admit to myself how I feel. Because shame lives in the shadows. And I don't want to be stuck there anymore.

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Once You’ve Been With Someone Who Understands You, There’s No Going Back

Now that I know it's possible for someone else to understand me, there's no unknowing that. There's no going back.

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Manipulating People Close to You Is Like Cheating at Wordle

Manipulating someone I care about is as ridiculous as cheating at Wordle. Controlling the outcome ruins the whole thing. The whole point is that this is someone I can trust.

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That Sense of Relief When You Don’t Have Plans

"You know, it's funny," I say to my friend. "Other people have been encouraging me to get out and do more, all fun things, but I haven't wanted to. And they said this meant I was depressed, but I have to say... now that I have a few things off my plate, I feel so much relief. So much relief."

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Being Left Out and Simply Being Different Can Feel So Similar

Being left out and simply being different can feel so similar. Your emotions can be sloppy about recognizing the difference between others excluding you and isolating yourself.

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I Think the Unnecessary Gratitude Will Always Be There

There was a meme that got really popular a while back that advised people who were dating folks who had been abused in the past. They'll be grateful for little things, the meme said. And they'll try to thank you for that. You need to discourage that behavior, the meme advised.

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It’s Hard to Get Over Things When Time Hasn’t Been Moving

Just because it's taking me a while to get over this stuff, it doesn't mean it'll never happen. Time got really darn weird. And there's no deadline on healing.

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It Must Truly Be Painful to Only Appreciate Value in Hindsight

It has to be truly painful only to appreciate value in hindsight. To only want the things you've already lost.

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I Keep a Folder Full of Happy-Making Things

One of the best things I ever did was create a folder full of stuff that's aimed to make me happy on the dark days.

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