Allison Tebo's Blog, page 6

Summer Aesthetic

I was enthusiastic about the idea for doing Seasonal Aesthetic posts, but also a little hesitant.  Was it sort of corny?  My doubts were settled by the lovely response of dear followers who responded with a categorical “yes” when I asked if I should create a more seasonal aesthetics!  And, because of you, here is the next installment!

 

I just barely squeaked this one in on the last month of summer (although, for some South-dwellers, summer weather will continue into October).
Let us dive into these last golden weeks, my friends – and eat, drink, watch, read, and BREATHE summer.

 

MOVIES:

 

FOR ADULTS:
Type :  Science Fiction and Historical Dramas
Suggested movies:  Journey to Center of the Earth and The King’s Speech, Horatio Hornblower, Sky Captain,

 

FOR CHILDREN (or the young at heart):
Type :  Animated movies and Foreign Films
Suggested movies:  Lilo and Stitch, The Jungle Book, Tresaures of the Snow, Belle and Sebastian, 

 

 

 

BOOKS –
Classics:
Type :   Adventure.
Suggested reading:  Treasure Island and Around the World in 80 days.

 

 

Adult:
Type :  Science Fiction and Memoirs
Suggested reading: Out of the Silent Planet, Journey to the Center of the Earth.  Laughter on the Stairs by Beverly Nichols.  All Creatures Great and Small.  Bring ‘Em Back Alive.

 

 

Children:
Type :  Sci Fi and Historical Fiction
Suggested reading:   Trion Rising, Jason and Alien’s Down the Street.  My Brother’s Secret.  The Reb and the Redcoats.  

 

Comic / Graphic Novel:
Type:  Adventurous and Scientific
Suggested reading :  Tintin

 

 

 

FOOD AND DRINK –

 

Hamburgers / chicken Parmesan / blueberry soup / BLT sandwiches / fresh watermelon / arnold palmers / popsicles / milkshakes / strawberry shortcake

 

MUSIC –

OPERA (and operetta):
                       Suggested song:  
“Una voce poco fa” from Rossini’s The Barber of Seville.  “Papageno and Papagena” from Mozart’s The Magic Flute.  “With Cat-Like Tread” from Gilbert and Sullivan’s The Pirates of Penzance.

 

 

 

CLASSICAL:
                      Suggested song:  Vivaldi’s Summer, 3rd Movement .  Vaughan Williams The Lark Ascending .  Mozart’s Violin Concerto No. 3 (3rd movement).  Roses from the South by Johann Strauss.



POP:
                      Suggested song:   Dulce amour and Milagro by Glorifa Estefan.  Musica del Corazon and Aléjate by Josh Groban.

 

 

THEATER:
                      Suggested Song:  “Music of the Night” from Phantom of the Opera.  “If Ever I Would Leave You” from Camelot.  “Hello Dolly” from Hello Dolly.   

 

 

ACTIVITIES –

have a pool party
have a cookout
blow bubbles
go rollerskating
tackle a DIY project



get a summer haircut
plant a garden
play a round of mini golf
camp in the backyard
fly a kite

head to the beach
stargaze
have a water balloon fight
see an outdoor concert
pick strawberries at a local farm
catch lightning bugs in a jar

have a zip line adventure
go to an old-fashioned carnival
go to a drive-in theater
visit the nearest amusement park
watch fireworks
Start a journal

 

 

I’m not a realllly good representative of my own aesthetic because, based on this list, I’ve only done the following.
I read Out of the Silent Planet and a novel by Beverely Nichols.  I ate hamburgers, milkshakes and popsicles.
I watched a live stream of fireworks (not the same), I got to borrow someone’s swimming pool, I planted flowers (not a garden, ah well), got my hair cut, I got lightning bugs in a jar (BUT THEY DIDN’T LIGHT UP – WHAT IS THIS MADNESS?).

 

 

I did listen to 95 percent of the music listened on this post, though.  *pats self on back*
Before the month is over, I would LIKE to have a water balloon fight, stargaze, and tackle a DIY project.  A carnival would be nice too, but that could be a little ambitious.

 

 

Okay, now it’s your turn.  I’d like to hear about your favorite things to do in spring.  Give me your quintessential Spring books, movies, food and activities.  I’d love to hear about it!
Now, please excuse me – I have to go blow some bubbles.

What Disney Taught Me About Writing

*ALLISON APPEARS IN A PUFF OF DISNEY SMOKE AND MAGIC*

 

 

PSA, folks!  This is the final post in my themed month of all-things Disney!

 

 

– and, hopefully, a fitting and worthy conclusion.

 

Today’s post is entitled WHAT DISNEY TAUGHT ME ABOUT WRITING.  In this post, I expound on how the quality films of Old Disney fueled my passion for writing family-friendly stories.
Be warned, it MIGHT, POSSIBLY, PERHAPS, SORT OF contain some fairly controversial statements?  *puts up force field to fend off potential attacks*

 

 

I’m not QUITE sure how everyone will react to this blog post since I’m expressing some pretty definite opinions and touching on some subjects that many writers are quite passionate about . . . buuuut . . . hopefully, it will be clear and positive and not rage-inducing – which was not my intention.

 

(a non-Disney gif but, whatever)

 

Annnyway – whether it’s enjoyable, controversial, or all of the above . . .  enjoy my ramble!

 

 

And while you’re in the neighborhood, don’t forget to  subscribe to my newsletter  if you want exclusive writing updates about my Tales of Ambia series and other goodies!  I will love you forever if you do.
Nah, I already love you, but this would still be awesome, and I shall spontaneously distribute virtual pixie dust for anyone who does sign up.

 

 

ARE YOU READY?  THEN CLICK THIS LINK.  LET’S READ, DISNEY FANS!

 

 

I had a lot of fun creating these Disney-themed posts, and I hope you fun reading them!  I may do it again next year – what do you think?

 

As always, thank you so much for reading and for joining me for yet another month of blogging.
Your time and your friendship mean a great deal to me and every comment is so special to me.  See you next week!

Legends of Western Cinema Week – Tag

*Allison rides into town in her custom cowgirl outfit*

 

CLEAR THE STREETS, CITIZENS.  I’VE GOT A GIF GUN AND AN ITCHY TRIGGER FINGER.  THE GIFS ARE GOING TO BE FLYING, AND IF YOU DON’T WANT TO BE SHOT WITH LAUGHTER, YOU’D BETTER GO HIDE IN THE SALOON!

 

*removes hat with a sigh*  Welp, I did it again, folks.  I had all of my July blog posts scheduled and ready to go.  I wrote them all early, trying to get some of the work off my plate so I could relax and focus on other tasks.

 

SO WHAT DO I DO?  I SEE THIS VERY AWESOME TAG ON A FRIEND’S BLOG AND I JUST HAVE TO GET INVOLVED.

So I pile the work back onto my plate and start blogging like a mad dog again just as I was trying to take a break.

 

 

This tag is part of a blogging event for this week only and I can’t resist blogging about Westerns so, obviously, I HAD to overturn everything and embrace the grief and joy of writing a fresh and harried post so I could participate in this shindig.
And that’s why I am interrupting your pre-scheduled program for this special news bulletin AND YOU’RE JUST GOING TO HAVE TO ACCEPT THE INSANITY OF IT AS I DID, BECAUSE I’M NOT GOING TO GIVE ANY MORE EXCUSES.

 

 

 

But I know what you’re thinking.  “Wait a minute, Allison!  You promised us a month of DISNEY themed posts.  You’re breaking up the theme by doing a Western tag!”
You’re wrong, Pilgrim.  I plugged up that problem, no sweat.

 

While this post is Western themed and I will be answering the tag questions, at the very end of the post, I’ll be adding on an extra spotlight on DISNEY’S LIVE-ACTION WESTERN MOVIES, THEREBY CIRCUMVENTING ANY PROTESTS AND STILL COVERING MYSELF IN HONEST GLORY.

 

 

ALLISON’S GOT YOU COVERED, COMPADRES.  I was able to participate and collaborate with some amazing fellow bloggers, stuck to my promised theme, gave you FIVE posts instead of four this month, and wrote up the fastest blog post EVER.  I think I set a new speed record for myself with this post.

 

 

And so, without further ado – ONTO THE TAG.  And the spotlight.

 

 

 

1) Do you tolerate, like, or love Westerns?

 

(a picture of me at Old Tuscon walking up to the hacienda used for one of my favorite TV shows of all time, The High Chaparral) 

 

 

I like them!!!!  And there are certain Westerns I LOVE.  Among them, Chisum and Big Jake.  My favorite type of Westerns are the ones that don’t really FEEL like a Western.  Let me explain.
Westerns, like any genre, are glutted with tropes, to the point where we will see the same story over and over again.  In a Westerns case that means:  Mysterious stranger cleans up the town.  Some mild variation may apply.
What I like are Westerns that simply use these magnificent trappings as a back drop for the stories of different genres.  For instance, War Wagon is a heist movie, but in a Western setting.  Chisum could be an epic fantasy film with its feudal like land barons and its massive cast of dueling characters, but it’s set in the West.  The Magnificent Seven is a remake of a samurai film, and still retains that foreign flavor.  Support Your Local Sheriff and Support Your Local Gunfighter are screwball comedies that just happen to be set in the Wild West.

 

(some Internet wit replaced the word “Sheriff” with “Mod” in this Gif – which makes it even more funny)

 

2) What do you enjoy about them and, more broadly, the West? (Eg. the history, accompanying paraphernalia, etc)?

 

Um – ALL OF IT???
History has always been my favorite subject, and so that’s definitely part of it.  The paraphernalia – UH, YES.  I love a good outfit – and how could you NOT like the standard cowboy gear (including that six-gun)?  I could do an entire blog post just about the costumes I’ve seen in Western films and loved. Kristen Larson was my first American Girl doll, so that also explains some of my early infatuation with the Pioneers.  Growing up, I played endless hours of Oregon Trail (I probably played it like no one ever has before).  I adore the scenery of the West – it is ruggedly beautiful.  It’s vastness is both awe-inspiring and overwhelming.  As an artist, the light and shadow and the rich earth colors of the West greatly appeal to me.
But, most of all, I think it’s the spirit of the West and what it represents that I love most.
Many people around the world still to this day think of Americans as being synonymous with cowboys.  Cowboy culture is quintessentially American.  There was no other history quite like this on earth, no other land conquered in quite this way.
This Christmas, while driving across Texas, New Mexico, and Arizona, I deeply felt the richness of our nation.  As we drove past crops, oil fields, cattle ranches, and railroads, I really felt as if I was moving through the heart of our nation, at the very least, the life-blood.  But this is not a richness that we just snatched from the air, it’s an up-by-the-bootstraps success.  We are blessed by a fertile and vast land, but it was up to us to conquer it, to cultivate it and connect it to every state, making it the powerful nation that we know today.

 

 

I love the straightforwardness and the toughness of the men and women of this historical period (and genre).  They are true heroes, brave and honest and with a strong moral code who don’t waste time wallowing around in their emotions and doubts but act with decisiveness and boldness.
To this day, Westerns and cowboys are STILL popular all around the world, despite everyone’s best efforts to rewrite their history or decry them as politically incorrect.  They’re an American icon, and I for one am going to fan the love for them – as well as the old-fashioned, rootin-tootin, don’t-take-no-guff America of our heritage.
*when anti-American subversives criticize our history and our ancestors*

 

 

3) What’s the first Western you can remember watching?

 

Oh gosh . . .
It was probably a John Wayne film or, more than likely, a Roy Rogers film.  I do remember watching the Comancheros and North to Alaska since I was quite small.  Or Support your Local Sheriff and Support Your Local Gunfight.
Westerns made up the bulk of what I watched as a child, so I really can’t remember.

 

 

4) Who are your favorite Western stars, the ones whose presence in a Western will make you pick it up off the shelf?

 

Probably John Wayne.
There was one period where I didn’t like John Wayne (I think it was his role in Mclintock that turned me off of him for a while – a movie and a performance which would sully anybody’s opinion).  But I got over that brief bout of madness and the older I get, the more I love John Wayne.
I really admire his problem-solving abilities: hard words, swift action, flying fists, and hot lead.  #GoodTimes
One of the things that really just makes him even better is that he was basically playing himself.  He was a proud, tough American with gumption and cowboy wisdom and, whether you liked him or not, he had something that most people don’t possess – consistency.
He was a conservative hunk of unapologetic manhood that didn’t tolerate foolishness, corruption, or sass.

 

 

5) What’s your favorite performance by an actress in a Western?

 

Katharine Hepburn in Rooster Cogburn (the sequel to True Grit)!  Miss Eula Goodnight is utterly magnificent!  She’s the sort of person you might aspire to be when you grow up.  *laughs*  She is cheerful, bold, calm, possessing a fiery and grounded faith, and doesn’t take no guff from nobody (though when she gives it back to you, she does it in the most polite and refined way).  She has a fabulous vocabulary, maintains her high standards no matter the situation, and she’s happily and independently single.  This is a woman I can relate to and a woman that inspires me!  Not many people can give John Wayne back as good as he gives, let alone flummox him, but Eula Goodnight does it with a smile.
And she’s a darn good shot with a gatling gun.

 

 

6) What is your “go-to” Western, the one you’ll typically reach for?

 

Chisum!!!!!  CHISUM, CHISUM, CHISUM, CHISUM!!!!
This isn’t just a great Western, this is a great FILM – one of the best.  Majestic scenery, masterful scripting, perfect editing, beautiful cinematography and perfect casting of dozens of brilliant actors, many of whom are playing real, historic characters.  This is one of my favorite roles for John Wayne, and we get to see a bit more of his gentler side in his tender relationship with his niece.  This film also features one of the best portrayals of Billy the Kid I’ve ever seen – Geoffrey Deuel is absolutely brilliant in his likable but tragic portrayal.

 

 

As I said earlier, this movie is almost like an epic fantasy set in the Wild West.  The cast is huge, the plot complex, and the stakes high as mighty land barons fight for control of the territory.  The little people are swept into the conflict and have to choose sides.  Politics play a big part as the characters struggle to twist the law and leaders such as sheriffs and senators to do their bidding.  In a lawless land, the strong moral men who have carved out a life for themselves are forced to uphold the code until the law arrives.  Even the opening credits feel almost like we’re panning across epic tapestries as a troubadour relates a tale of ancient glory.  Check out these opening credits and listen to the music (song) written by one of my favorite film composers, Dominic Frontiere!

 

 

7) Do your family/friends share your interest in Westerns, or are you a lone ranger (pun completely intended)? 

 

Fortunately for this extroverted cowgirl, I do not ride this range alone.  My dad was the one that instilled an appreciation for Westerns in my siblings and me and my mom used to watch shows like Branded and Bonanza as a child, so how could we possibly escape the Western bug?
I have many, many memories of watching Westerns with my family.  If it’s well-made, we’ll all probably enjoy it.  Our latest Western kick has been the Maverick TV show.

 

 

8) Pick one Western to live inside for a week, and explain why you chose it.

 

Castaway Cowboy?  Because then I could still be a cowgirl, but I could live in HAWAII.  I’ll be the cowgirl sipping a cold drink out of the coconut on the beach, thank you.

 

9) Share one (or several!) of your favorite quotes from a Western.

 

HOW MUCH TIME DO YOU HAVE?  Westerns are SO quotable.  Here’s a few.

 

 

Movie:  Cahill: U.S. Marshall.  The hero:  John Wayne.
The Scene:  John Wayne rides into a snowy clearing full of criminals.  He’s completely surrounded but he coolly reaches into his pocket, sticks his badge on his jacket (got to keep this official) and asks calmly.  “Any of you want to surrender?”  #STYLE

 

 

Movie:  True Grit (the REAL True Grit – not the remake).  The hero: John Wayne.
The Scene:  Mattie draws out her ancient weapon.
Wayne:  “Why, girl, that’s a Colt’s Dragoon! You’re no bigger than a corn nubbin, what’re you doing with all this pistol?

Later, when describing the target he is perusing.  
Wayne: “Short feisty fella, nervous and quick, got a messed-up lower lip.”
Quincy: “That don’t bring nobody to mind. A funny lip?”
Wayne:  “Wasn’t always like that, I shot him in it.”
Quincy:  “In the lower lip? What was you aiming at?”
Wayne (sarcastically):  “His upper lip!”

(while introducing La Boeuf)
Wayne:  “Yeah! This is the famous horse killer from El Paso. He believes in puttin’ everybody afoot.”

 

Movie:  The Comancheros.  The Hero:  Stuart Whitman.
Paul Regret:  (while playing poker).  “Mind a suggestion friend? Trouble with you is you don’t enjoy the game for its own rewards: stimulation, relaxation, pleasant association, and interesting conversation.”  (my family quotes this all the time when we play cards)

 

Movie:  The Comancheros.  The Heroes:  Stuart Whitman and John Wayne.
Wayne (after trying to keep Whitman from being hanged):  “Of course, MY conscious will be clear – I’ll have done all I could.”
Whitman:  “Oh, great, GREAT.  As I drop through the hatch I’ll think:  Well, Big Jake did all he could!”

 

That does it for the tag.  And now . . . *drum roll*

 

A SPOTLIGHT ON DISNEY’S WESTERN FILMS.

 

 

The Apple Dumpling Gang

 

 

After three poor orphans are sent to live with gambler Russell Donovan, they discover they have actually inherited a large fortune from their dead father. Soon a series of greedy undesirables shows up trying to get their hands on the money.  In order to keep things uncomplicated, the kids decide to give their inheritance to a lovable outlaw duo, Theodore (Don Knotts) and Amos (Tim Conway). But there is only one problem — the gold is locked away in a bank vault.

 

Wacky and sweet, slapstick humor and exciting action are effortlessly juxtaposed in this classic Disney film that features one of my funniest bar room brawls of all time (and I’m a bit of a connoisseur of bar room brawls – er, in movies)

 

It’s corny and over-the-top, but it’s also a funny and charming film about lost souls becoming a family – since the highlight of the film is definitely the selfish, grumpy gambler growing softer and softer as he falls under the spell of three sweet and irresistible children.  And guys, if you can’t laugh at Don Knotts and (especially) Tim Conway, I am really worried about your sense of humor.
It’s also full of hilarious and highly quotable dialogue.  Such as:  “You know something, Amos? The Lord poured your brains in with a teaspoon, and somebody jiggled His arm!”

 

Castaway Cowboy

 

Texas cowboy, Lincoln Costain (James Garner), gets shanghaied in San Francisco, then jumps ship and washes ashore on the Hawaiian island of Kauai, right into the arms of widow Henrietta and her son, who are struggling to make a living as farmers. A lot of wild cattle often trample their crops, so Costain gets the idea to start cattle ranching instead. The Hawaiian farm hands don’t readily take to the American cowboy culture, and Bryson (Robert Culp), is a banker with eyes to grab Henrietta’s land and maybe Henrietta herself.

 

Nobody in Kauai has ever raised cattle before, and transporting them by longboat to ships at harbor is even more of a difficulty.
The uptight Garner doesn’t mix well with the happy-go-lucky Hawaiian workmen – who would rather laugh and horse around than do anything else in life.  A confirmed bachelor, Garner is also struggling with the fact that the young son of the lady who hired him is glomming on to him with a goal to keep him around permanently . . . a goal that his mother just might share.  Add to that the acts of sabotage from the slimy local banker who will do anything to stop Garner from success, including paying off a witch doctor to curse the workers, a curse that results in the no-nonsense Garner tracking the witch doctor down to a taboo cave along the coast to have a violent showdown with the bitter shaman.
It has all the elements of a classic western (nasty banker, cattlemen, stampedes, the lonely widow) but it blends it wonderfully with Hawaiian culture and scenery.  Even the music has a fabulous Western melody punctuated by happy luau rhythms – it’s wonderful.

One Little Indian

 

 

On the run from the Cavalry, a man tries to disappear while accompanied by two camels and a runaway boy. His escape is made harder when he meets a widow and her daughter who may turn him in.

 

This film is set before the Civil War, during an time of experimentation of the U.S. Government to create a United States Camel Corps and to implement camels as pack animals in the Southwestern United States (who says you can’t learn history from Disney??)
I love James Garner.  You have to like him even if he isn’t always playing the most honorable character.  *laughs*  This movie is quirky and exciting but, most of all, it’s a poignant story about two outcasts who are lucky enough to find one another and form a father / son relationship.  Clint Keyes is on the run from the army, and so is Mark – an Indian captive who has been collected by the Army but is determined to return to his adopted Cheyenne family.  This common goal unites them, and thus, we have a buddy film as these this unlikely duo travels across the desert on the even more unlikely conveyance of a grumpy camel named Rosie and her baby, Thirsty.
James Garner is always wonderful with child actors, while still being fabulously understated and retaining his blow-heart manner, and this movie and friendship is no exception.  A simple and decent film with a heartwarming finale.

 

Savage Sam

 

 

Travis (Tommy Kirk) and Arliss Coates (Kevin Corcoran) are in charge of the family farm when their parents leave to visit their ailing grandmother. Thankfully, they have Old Yeller’s son, Savage Sam, to keep them company. Initially, Travis and Arliss bump heads because Travis is older and more responsible, and Arliss wants to shirk his duties. When the boys and a neighbor’s daughter are taken captive by a tribe of Apaches, it is up to Savage Sam to save the day.

 

I liked this sequel way more than it’s predecessor, Old Yeller (COME ON, YOU GUYS – WHO WOULD LIKE A MOVIE WHERE THE DOG DIES IN THE END?).

 

 

In this film, Sam the dog lives (that’s not a spoiler, that’s an assurance).  But while he plays an important role in the film, he’s not the central character as the human counterparts are more developed.
This movie is full of humor, exciting action, and even hardship, but most of all, it’s about families determined to be reunited.  I especially love Uncle Beck and the band of men (most of them family men, as well) who mount a desperate attempt to rescue the kidnapped children.  But, I must say, it is ornery Arliss that steals the show in this film.  By the end of the movie, the Apaches truly regret capturing that boy.  He takes resistance to a whole new level.  I’ve been told by my dad that some of his reactions in tormenting one particular Apache captor remind him of me – and I suppose I’ll take that as a compliment.

 

GUYS, WATCH THE OPENING CREDITS, I BEG YOU.  I LOVE THIS SONG SOOOO MUCH.  *WARM CHILDHOOD FUZZIES*

 

And there you have it!  A spotlight on a few of Disney’s old westerns!  Judging from the responses I got on my previous post (10 Disney Movies That Time Forgot But Shouldn’t Have) – I’m betting that there are very few of you that have seen these classic Disney films.

 

 

 

What about you, pardner?  Do you like Westerns? (you’d better).  If so, which is your favorite?  I’m always looking for fresh recommendations, for movies OR books!

*tips hat*

 

“Until we meet again – may the Good Lord take a liking to you.”  #RoyRogers

 

(don’t forget to check out the rest of the bloggers and posts of the Legends of Western Cinema Week!  You can find the links RIGHT HERE ON HAMLETTE’S SOLILOQUY!

 

10 Disney Movies That Time Forgot (but shouldn’t have).

Hello, hello, hello, my friend!

 

 

It’s time for round three of Disney!
I’ll bet you thought you knew the bulk of Disney films out there – WELL, CHUM, PREPARE TO BE CHALLENGED. 

My Definitive Ranking Of Every Disney Princesses

 

And the month of Disney continues!  *Mickey Mouse Cheer*  Introducing week two of the Mighty Mouse marathon!

 

 

Last week, we took a look at my favorite (and least-favorite) Disney Princes.  Now, it’s the ladies turn!  Simply keep scrolling for my definitive ranking of every Disney Princess!

 

Well, ALMOST every Disney Princess.  I don’t count Moana or Merida.  Don’t know why, exactly – I just don’t.

 

 

And, again, I’m basing these opinions off of varying degrees of familiarity.  For some of these princesses, I’ve only seen clips.  BUT IS THAT GOING TO STOP ME FROM JUDGING THEM AS A WHOLE?  DO YOU REALLY THINK IT WILL?

 

 

IF YOU THINK THAT WILL STOP ME, YOU DON’T KNOW ME AT ALL.  #IDoWhatIWant

 

 

 

*smiles sweetly*  FORWARD, YE PEOPLE.  Let us ride into the kingdom of fair maidens and judge them with candor and brutality!  And, occasionally, affection.

 

# 12 – Snow White.

 

HER VOICE.  OH MY GOSH, HER VOICE.

 

 

The real question in the movie: why someone didn’t try to kill Snow White SOONER? Why were the dwarves crying when she was comatose? SHE WAS FINALLY SILENCED.
Okay, aside from her voice, there’s just not much there.  She’s a hard worker, which is a good thing.  And she whistles while she works, so give her a point for cheerfulness.  That’s the nicest thing I can say about her.  But other than that, she’s dumb as a the proverbial hammer and about as annoying when said hammer strikes your thumb instead of the nail head.
I’m not a fan of a lot of Disney’s modern agendas, but giving their princesses a LEETLE more personality is a definite improvement, as opposed to plastic dollies who just stand there and accept eat food given to them by strangers and are generally bland, dumb, and aggravating.
But the salt in the wound?  This is the princess that COULD have been voiced by Deanna Durbin (who happens to be one of my favorite actresses).  She auditioned for the part, but was rejected because she sounded too womanly.
GUYS, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU???  DEANNA DURBIN WAS BORN TO BE A DISNEY PRINCESS.  ANY PRINCESS. ARE YOU CRAZY????

 

# 11 – Ariel

 

 

AGAIN WITH THE VOICE.

 

 

Plus, I’m not a fan of the rebellious, disobedient characters.  What I’ve seen of Ariel just struck me as annoying, rather than charming.
And then . . . let’s talk about the voice some more.  It’s partially a mercy that Tour Guide Barbie doesn’t speak for half the movie, I suppose, but then we’re left with nothing but that over-emoting face.  I MEAN, LOOK AT THAT DUMB FACE.

 

 

Her eyes are so big and bright, I feel as if they might pop out of her skull.  *backs away*
And she IS pretty foolish.  She makes a deal with a SEA WITCH.  Some could excuse that by saying that’s how in love (or rather, enamored) she is with Prince Eric (which raises it’s own set of questions) but I just call it foolishness.  Before you jump into Eric’s world, honey, you’d better figure out how to survive better in your OWN neck of the woods because you have “helpless victim” stamped all over you.
And guys, let’s remember she does all this for Eric.  ERIC.

 

# 10 –  Aurora

 

 

I’m torn over deciding whether Aurora – the girl who spends the bulk of her life sleeping – is an inspiration or a horror story.
In any event, it’s hard to get too excited about a character that does little but sleep.  That, or mooning around in the woods dancing with owls and waiting for some romantic fool to give her a pick-up line.

 

 

Sorry, but I have a little trouble relating to female characters that want nothing more than a guy.

 

 

I mean, don’t you have any other goals in life???  And again, just not a fan of the voice.  Or even really her face / animation.  And she’s kind of boring so . . . yeah, there’s really nothing else to say about Aurora.

# 9 – Jasmine

 

 

Welp, it’s pretty hard to respect a gal that’s yapping about being a liberated female and dresses, uh, the way Jasmine does.  If she’s not a prize to be won, how come you dress like a crackerjack prize, honey?
The one thing I did like about Jasmine (and really the only redeeming thing I found about her) is that she had an interesting voice.  Usually, alluring voices are lower and smokier than Jasmine’s younger, girlier voice.  I found this to be the only thing fresh about Jasmine.
Aside from, you know, her behavior.  That was plenty fresh.

 

 

And yep, that’s it.  I don’t have anything else to say about her.  She got an extra point because I like her looks (face/animation) better than Snow or Aurora.

 

# 8 –  Cinderella

 

 

When I was little, I didn’t get Cinderella.  I’m afraid I was not gifted with a docile nature and I probably would have been cooking up ways to smother Lady Tremaine and her brats in their sleep, so I grew up thinking Cinderella was unutterably wishy-washy and weak.
But upon growing older and viewing this movie again recently with a more open mind, I finally recognized that Cinderella is a good character.  We DO see her struggling with her lot in life in the little moments where she glares or snaps at Lucifer, or sighs or rolls her eyes at the Stepmother and her stepsisters.  Not to mention her stern treatment of Lucifer.

 

 

I really liked that you saw the foreshadowing of how Cinderella would be a good princess one day.  She serves and rules her little kingdom well, and always looks out for her little animal subjects.  Even the cruel individuals are treated fairly and graciously.
What really damages Cinderella for me is I felt that she had a lack of scope.  There was no clear “I want” for Cinderella, other than to go to a party.  Which was great for a short term goal, but I was left wondering what sort of dreams Cinderella had for the rest of her life.  Had she accepted that her current situation was going to be her life-long destiny?  Did she not realize the full-scope of her imprisonment?  It was a little unclear.
Overall, her voice is quite pleasant, both speaking and singing, her looks are okay, and I really liked her animation (watch Cinderella’s movements closely and see how the artist did a great job combining a homey sweetness with a graceful dignity).  She had the potential to have a higher rating on here, but lost points because, ultimately, I didn’t really understand what made her tick.

 

# 7 –  Mulan

 

 

Before I watched this movie, I had heard a great deal about it, and I really thought Mulan was going to be my favorite Disney Princess.  Unfortunately, the actress just didn’t cut it to me.  She has an oddly flat voice and during the most emotional scenes adopts a flat, laborious delivery that kind of ruined the impact of the moment.  It’s a really strange effect, almost as if she suddenly becomes an automaton.  Go watch a few of the more emotional scenes you’ll see what I’m talking about.
And then we have the magically changing face.  I like Mulan’s face / animation when she is a girl, but the minute she dons a uniform and disguises herself as a man, her face (and animation) LITERALLY changes and she looks like a completely different character (and somehow a dumber, less engaging one).

 

I don’t know – is it just me???

 

Now for her character. I felt that there was good material here (unlike the frenetic clumsiness of Princess Anna, Mulan has a quieter awkwardness that is endearing), and she is obviously brave, smart, and cares about the people around her but . . . I didn’t really feel that Mulan had any faults.  I felt like the only thing holding her back from doing ANYTHING in life was the fact that she was female (oh, darn those chauvinistic men and my traditional nation, yada, yada, yada).  She seemed a little too perfect.  She even ended up feeling a little boring as Mushu ended up stealing the show and she almost started to feel like HIS side kick.  Mushu is awesome and all, but this is supposed to be Mulan’s movie.
However, I do love Mulan’s goal.  She is one of the very few princesses who is isn’t looking for romance and has some clear goals outside of a guy.  #ARMPUMP  She adores her father (very relatable) and would do anything for him, even risk death.  The core of her nature is genuinely heroic and inspiring but, sadly, all the trimmings didn’t live up to the hype for me.

 

# 6 –  Tiana

 

 

Visually, I like how Tiana looks; she’s really pretty and there are parts of Tiana’s character that I can relate to more than any other Disney Princess.  Almost There could practically be my theme song.  A girl that loves her parents, lives for goals, and is bursting with ambition and wants to go into business and basically not be bothered or distracted from her dreams?  Yes, please!
But, unfortunately, I found it very difficult to connect with Tiana in her frog form.  The minute she turned into an amphibian the burgeoning connection I felt with her disappeared.  Admittedly, even before the transformation the animation style of The Princess and the Frog wasn’t my favorite (it all looked overly cartoony to me).  In addition, while I liked the basis for Tiana’s personality, I didn’t feel that there was anything extra.  I felt that the film makers themselves were a little nervous about Tiana and shrank from giving her any more personality than just the basics.  I ended up feeling as if she didn’t have any faults and was a little TOO strong.  Yes, she sort of is supposed to learn to love and lighten up – but she already DID care about people in her life (Charlotte, her mom) and she could be more lighthearted around them . . . so . . . her personal arc and journey was a big froggy splat for me.
They had a great foundation, but I felt that her character and her animation style could have been even more layered.  But . . . again, part of the trouble I might have been having is because of the voice.  I just didn’t connect with the vocal performance as much as I wanted to.  I don’t think she had an unpleasant voice, I just felt it was lacking in the vibrancy and personality that is necessary for any animated character.

 

# 5 –  Rapunzel

 

 

Okay, don’t get me wrong, I LIKE Rapunzel quite a bit, but I don’t adore her quite as much as the rest of the Internet seems to.  I kind of feel like I’ve seen her character before a lot – the cute, dorky little princess who doesn’t act like your dainty royal but is going to win everyone over with her vibrancy and sweetness, etc, etc.  Now, I thought that they did this trope very well, but . . . honestly, it’s still a bit of a trope.
One of my favorite aspects about Rapunzel (and one of the things that makes her different from Anna, another dorky princess) is her primness.  If you watch Rapunzel’s movements (tipping my hat again to the genius Glen Keane), she has this adorable body language that sets her apart from any of the other princesses.  She’s a slightly more self-conscious princess, a little more behaved and delicate than Anna, a little more shy or unsure of herself – and that is a big part of her charm.
Visually, she is pretty cute (love the green eyes and freckles) but I felt that the expressions weren’t QUITE as good as they could have been, and I think most of that can be blamed on the actress (since the animators draw a lot of their inspiration from filmed videos of the vocal performances).  I think Mandy Moore has a cute voice, but I sooort of felt like she had a tendency to up the Valley Girl emoting during intense scenes instead of genuinely acting.
But don’t mourn!  Rapunzel is still in my top five favorite princesses!  She’s a sweet, perky Renaissance woman with a delightful innocence and a generous spirit that is ready to make the ultimate sacrifice for those she cares about.  In the end, I admit there’s very little not to love about Rapunzel.  You’ve got to let me nit-pick a LITTLE BIT, folks, otherwise we’ll never narrow this down!

 

# 4 – Elsa

 

 

There’s plenty to like about Elsa.  I actually feel this is the first time that Disney ever really attempted to portray an introvert, and I think they really nailed that aspect.  I like her quietness, her reserve, her natural dignity and graceful manner.
She’s incredibly animated, with her heart in her eyes and every emotion we need to see on full display in her face.  There’s a lostness in her countenance, but also a cute appealing quality and it’s clear that we can see the little girl beneath the queen.
I really liked her vocal performance (Idina Mendel has a unique, almost scratchy voice that was a perfect blend of vulnerability and aloofness, staidness and emotion) and felt that she was one of the most unique Disney Princess voices we’ve had in a while.
How did she lose points?  Well, Elsa’s not really a heroine in this movie.
I’m always puzzled when people (though, granted, they are usually rebellious, angry people) hold Elsa up as a role modal – she is really more of a cautionary tale.  “Being herself” and throwing off all rules didn’t bring her happiness, it didn’t fix her problems and it only harmed her and everyone else around her.  What Elsa has to learn is that rules are there for a reason and it IS possible to control yourself, to curb wayward talent, to refine and hone skills, to discipline your emotions.  That’s one of the things that make me like Elsa.  She’s a wonderful example of how rebellion is wrong, but that there is hope and it is Love (specifically, the Love of Christ) that can refine and hone what we, in our own strength, cannot control.  Elsa is not a strong character, despite her amazing powers.  She starts out this movie as a very weak and fearful character because she doesn’t have any self-control.  While this makes her very human, that doesn’t make her a positive character by any means, merely complex and interesting.
I’m not saying all this to be negative about Elsa (hey, I was just dismissing princesses earlier for NOT having faults), I merely say all of this to point out that Elsa is not the hero of Frozen, she the the antagonist / anti-hero, thus, it’s a little difficult to rank her in the same way as a typical Disney princess.  I still like her a lot, she’s a well done character, one of the best Disney has produced.  But while that might bump her into a place of honor above other boring princesses, she can never be a favorite heroine.
HOWEVER, FROZEN 2 IS COMING AND ELSA IS PROBABLY GOING TO BE MORE OF A HEROINE AND JUST GENERALLY AWESOME AND I CAN’T WAIT!!!

 

 

 

Note:  Elsa also lost a point because  . . . that singing voice.  GO AHEAD, YELL IN MY FACE AND SCREECH LIKE A CHICKEN, WHY DON’T YOU?

 

 

*cracks knuckles*  And now the rubber hits the road.  These last three were VERY close for me and were only separated by teensy  technicalities.

 

 

# 3 –  Belle

 

Ahhh, Belle!

My Definitive Ranking Of Every Disney Prince

I saw my friend Eva’s do a post like this over on her blog, Coffee, Classics, and Craziness , and thought it was so fun, I was inspired to do my own definitive ranking of the Disney Princes and Princesses.

 

But then I decided to add something more.  I wanted to do something special for the month of July, and I decided to pick a theme for the month!

 

For the month of July, everything on Allison’s Well (and my author blog) is going to be about . . . DISNEY.

 

A Disney theme somehow felt appropriate for the hot summer months.
So now, without further ado, the first of four Disney themed blog posts – my definitive ranking of Disney princes!  Going to kind of let my hair down for this one.

June In A Nutshell

*ALLISON SWINGS INTO THE ROOM WITH A FLOURISH*

 

 

*trilling like an opera singer*  Time for nutshells!!!   I didn’t get as much done during June as I would have liked due to Life Happening and also because I got sick. Like, Really Sick.  For a week, I was pretty much useless to everyone except my bed.

 

 

(I’m gonna be honest – the only reason I mentioned being sick was just so I could use that gif – haha!

THE MIDYEAR FREAK OUT BOOK TAG 2019

*distributes programs at the door* 

 

*rams free suckers into the mouths of my enemies*

 

Guys, it’s time to talk about BOOKS.
Dead easy, that is.

BEST READS OF 2019 – 1ST QUARTER

Obviously, this should have posted this at the end of March, but . . . you know.

 

 

Apparently, people enjoy reading my book reviews, even though I don’t think they’re very good at all?

 

 

But it seems to be a general consensus (I’ll consider three or five of you a consensus) for me to continue my mini book review posts – so that’s what I’m doing!

 

Onto the book reviews!

 

Find It On Goodreads

 

I love a good contemporary story, but very few hit the nail on the head for me.  This book did.  An evocative story about family and a cute main character who’s struggle to be reconciled with her father (a wounded veteran) creates a real and sympathetic arc, instead of the fake drama that drives most contemporary novels.
The aesthetic is strong with this one, creating a truly sensory experience on every page.
The polished floor of a dance studio / musty old book stores / soft and gentle Labradors / bird-watching / owls gliding past a moon / slush melting on old carpet / snowball fights / mysterious messages / daring investigations / military talk/ the shrill of a coach’s whistle at a swim meet / fathers and daughters / icy bridges / frozen waterfalls / the magic transformations of home improvements / the snap and pop of grease on a hamburger grill /  the hum of a radiator / socked feet sliding over creaky wooden floors / cracked and worn letters / broken families mended together
Blend all these intense and evocative images with sweet characters and with a heartwarming plot and we are heading to a very satisfactory ending.

 

Find It On Goodreads

 

Unlikely some of Tolkien’s more depressing offerings to the world of literature, Roverandom is a whimsical little adventure bursting at the seams with old-fashioned romps.  The world building is wild and unfettered and reminds one of a slightly manic but happy chef throwing in “a bit of this and a bit of that” into a pot to make an irresistible concoction.  The world building is the true highlight here, along with the heartwarming backstory as to why Tolkien wrote this story, for his enthusiasm in entertaining (and comforting) his children is definitely present in these pages.  Amusing, clever, and droll, this is a truly imaginative fantasy novella that I highly recommend.

 

Find It On Goodreads

 

This little fantasy adventure draws on what are now often-used fantasy tropes, but there is a freshness and innocence to this story that makes them all new.  From purple, orange, and blue colored snow to the darling little mountain gargoyles who help and comfort our heroine, the world building was engaging and had some elements that felt delightfully fresh.
Written in the old, melodic style that I’ll always love, this short novel drops our truly plucky heroine into one exciting hazard after another.  Despite her obstacles, our heroine exhibits a determination and courage that is rarely see in more modern stories.
The ending / resolution did feel a little rushed and unsatisfactory to me and there were a few scenes that were very creepy, but that was the only thing that made me reduce a star from my rating.  All in all, a sweet original fairy tale that I highly recommend.

Find It On Goodreads

 

While not overtly Christian, there are wonderful themes that can be found in The Princess and the Goblin—like the nuggets of gold the goblins may find in the mountains.  Themes of trust, obedience, and courage are on fine display within these pages.  Curdie’s knowledge about how to defeat the goblins with songs (or stomping on their highly sensitive feet) and, most importantly, to not show them any fear is one of the best allegories I’ve ever seen for how we ought to face demonic forces.
Which leads me to the best part.  Curdie himself.  There are very few fearless heroes to be found in literature, but Curdie is one of them. I am sick and tired of heroes who are scared of their own shadow.  The trust that his parents (another plus in this novel, fantasy parents that are alive and love their children!) place in Curdie demonstrate the old-fashioned and, regrettably, bygone attitude that a boy of Curdie’s age was expected to be as responsible and courageous as an adult – and Curdie, while fully remaining a little boy who misunderstands and makes mistakes, does not disappoint in this expectation.
A beautifully written classic with a dreamy tone, I truly enjoyed this delightful fantasy novel which, I believe, was twice as good in an audio format.  Highly recommended!

Find It On Goodreads

 

Since I was very young, I have been enamored with miniatures. Bugs Life, Tinkerbell, dollhouses – anything tiny has always tickled my fancy and the idea of something like, say, a leaf being used as a hammock is altogether magical to me. This method of shrinking our known world makes the most ordinary surroundings and implements truly magical.
And while the characters and dialogue are so British to the point of being (occasionally) stilted with the dialogue can even be a tad incomprehensible at times, the adventures this little family goes through are something that anyone can appreciate and their yearning for a home is a classic theme that is completely relatable.  A delicately written and imaginative little adventure that is not to be missed.
Find It On Goodreads

 

Unlike The Magician’s Nephew (a blend of fresh and old, ancient and new) this story delves into the nitty-gritty of the path that lies before every human.
Sooner or later, we all step through a door that forces us to make our choice.  Are we with the Witch, or are we with Aslan?
This book more than any of the other Narnia books (except, perhaps, for The Last Battle) contains the clearest and most linear allegory paralleling the Bible and human history, as it shows a supposed follower turning traitor on the true king and then that king’s resurrection and redemption for all those that love him as he sends the Enemy into eternal death.
My eyes grow moist as I read Aslan’s sacrifice and my heart leaps with gladness when I read about his resurrection.  The Lion The Witch and the Wardrobe is a bit of melody to a song I never grow tired of hearing, and it’s only sweeter every time I listen to it.
Find It On Goodreads

 

I usually NEVER like the sequel of a book, it’s almost a physical impossibility for me.  It’s quite bothersome and, at times, downright upsetting.

 

 

I’m going to do a slightly different format for this review and list all the “sequelitis” problems (or story problems) I usually have with this kind of scenario and how this book rose above those pitfalls.
1.  The usual solution for a character caught between two worlds is to have them ultimately choose which world they belong in (Pocahontas, Balto, Tarzan . . . I could go on) but Palace of Stone showed a more realistic solution in the fact that Miri and Pedar, as artists and scholars, couldn’t resolve themselves to just one way of life but realized that a balance and a blend was a viable possibility.

 

 

2.  The love triangle.  We’ve seen this one before, the girl moves into the city and meets a new guy and experiences doubts about her hometown boy because he’s distracted and suddenly doesn’t seem interested in her, blah, blah, blah.  This is really the only book I can think of that executed this cliche well.  Palace of Stone really captured Miri’s mental and emotional implosion as she steps into such a foreign world, and we experienced her doubts right along with her.
Usually, I’m so annoyed with hometown boy, that I end up cheering on the new guy, but Palace of Stone but in enough obvious flaws in Timon and made it pretty clear from the start that he and Miri wouldn’t be compatible, keeping our loyalty in Pedar’s court.
I could go on, but suffice it to say, this is one of the best sequels I’ve read in a long time.

 

Find It On Goodreads

 

A hilarious original fairy tale where every line is packed with humor that is alternately sly, tongue-in-check play-ons, or bold-faced winks at the audience with a humor so broad, you have to groan a little even while you snicker.
This zany adventure had me laughing out loud every few pages (a rare thing for me) and is ridiculously self-aware.  It’s very much in the vein of The Hero’s Guide To Storming Your Castle, but with its own unique spin, The Unicorn’s Tale is sure to amuse.  If you’re looking for an unabashed fantasy novel that romps and mocks its way through every trope under the sun with a silliness that would put The Princess Bride to shame, this is the story for you.  I enjoyed it immensely and highly recommend this clever little read.

Find It On Goodreads

 

Imagine a contemporary Christmas Carol with a less creepy story line and you might have an approximation of this story.  After inhaling Mollie Reeder’s The Electrical Menagerie, I was eager to try anything else by this authoress, but wasn’t sure what to expect from this altogether different premise.  Never fear, the Reeder touch is still present.
The novella moves along at a strong clip, sweeping us up into the main character’s confused plunge through a succession of dreams – or are they dreams? – and culminating in a very satisfying and truly sweet ending.  A perfectly paced story full of heart but without the saccharine jingle-jangle that inhabits most Christmas stories with a narrator who remains sympathetic without wavering, even if he isn’t the most likable guy.
If you’re looking for a holiday story but aren’t an overly sentimental person  – *raises hand* – this is just the ticket.  And if you are a full-blown, holly-jolly Christmas Elf this will STILL satisfy you.  There’s simply nothing to dislike here.

And there you have it, my friend!  My favorite reads of 2019’s 1st quarter!  Not a great deal, considering that’s three months worth of reading, but I guard my four and five stars as fiercely as Bilbo protecting a wounded Thorin.

 

 

*pauses a moment* *overwhelmed by the emotion of that scene*

 

Ahem.  Anyway.  Do you want me to keep doing these book review posts or are you tired of them?

 

Have you read any of these books, my fellow book lovers?  If not, are you going to?  Please notice that I added very convenient links for you to add these titles to your already top-heavy TBR pile!  MUAHAHA!!!  *sails out of the room in triumph*

 

What were some of your favorite reads of 2019 thus far?  Let’s chat!

 

The D-Day Blogathon: Spotlight on Garrison’s Gorillas

Hey gang!  I’m so excited to announce that I am participating in my very first blogathon!  *THROWS HAT IN THE AIR*

 

Eva of Coffee, Classics, & Craziness and Hamlette of Hamlette’s Soliloquy are hosting a blogathon in honor of the 75th anniversary of D-Day. The blogathon began yesterday and will be completed on June 8th.  The blogathon will cover a variety of topics (movie reviews, book reviews, non fiction articles) regarding the European Theater of WW2), so don’t forget to check out Eva’s and Hamlette’s blog for the full schedule!
My subject of choice?  A review of one of my favorite shows EVER!

 

 

Ah, the infamous question.  What is your favorite TV show?
In a world of TV-binging and having dozens of shows at our fingertips on the Internet, it can be hard to choose.  However, I usually manage to narrow it down to the top five.

 

 

And firmly in that top five is Garrison’s Gorillas.
Warning:  This is a very, very, very, very, VERY long post (it just got longer with all those very’s) and I’ll be surprised if anyone reads every single word – BUT YOU’D BETTER, BECAUSE IT’S ALL GOLD – DO YOU HEAR ME? GOLD!!

 

^ Take a good look, people.  This is what awesome looks like.  ^

 

The Premise
A group of commandos recruited from stateside prisons to use their special skills against the Germans in World War II. They had been promised a parole at the end of the war if they fight (and if they live). The alternative was an immediate return to prison; if they ran, they could expect execution for desertion. The four were: “Actor”, a handsome, con man; “Casino”, a tough safe-cracker and mechanic; “Goniff”, a likable cat burglar; and “Chief” (Brendon Boone), a rugged, somber American Indian who handled a switchblade like he was born to it. Led by West Pointer First Lt. Craig Garrison and headquartered in a secluded mansion in London, this slippery group ranged all over Europe in exploits that often took them behind enemy lines.

The Characters

 

 

Get ready for some barely restrained squealing.  These are MY boys.  The feelings I have for this cast are similar to the emotions many harbor for the Fellowship of the Ring.  They’re my babies, so read respectfully OR ELSE.