Q.T. Pi's Blog: New Blog Who This?
December 6, 2017
Airing Your Laundry
Why In Public Though?
Like I get sometimes there’s just something you really need to get off your chest but why in public? I mean there was this blonde guy who looked like he was maybe 22, rocking back and forth in his chair rubbing his leg and nervously talking to this girl who seemed to have no interest in talking to him, about all of his problems in the public library. He just couldn’t sit still. When he wasn’t rubbing his leg he was tapping his computer so no matter what I did to block him out wasn’t enough.
I am sorry you’re life is going to shit but why are you doing this in public? You came to the library to get work done. I know this because you literally said this to the girl who didn’t want to hear your problems. So why are you pushing off doing your work to tell her about how you failed an exam. It was only hurting your relationship. She told you a number of times she had to get back to work but you kept pushing to keep the conversation going so you could almost brag to her about what a loser you’ve been this week.
Do you feel better now? Like is there something therapeutic about telling your problems to another person at a volume the whole world can hear? Why did I get a dirty look for looking at him too? I mean he was being so loud I had to put headphones in and he looked at me like I was trying to eavesdrop on him.
Nobody wanted to hear your problems, you just decided to make this place your living room. So I am here asking for anyone who is an expert on the subject. Why do people air their personal laundry to the public? Why do people feel comfortable talking about failing exams, breakups, wanting to “hook up” when they get back home. I mean GAG! I don’t care if you’ve been thinking about her body all day. Text her that shit, don’t skype it. It was beginning to feel like you were trying to get a Skype sex session going by the time she finally hung up on you.
So please help me understand why people feel the need to make their problems the world? I’m not talking about people who write blogs, tweets or put out Youtube videos. I’m not talking about people who put deliberate thought into posting things online for the public eye. I’m talking about people who treat the world like it’s their house. The ones who take their shoes off at the library, who text during movies, who talk loud on their cell phone then look at you like you’re the problem when you plug your ears.
Like I get sometimes there’s just something you really need to get off your chest but why in public? I mean there was this blonde guy who looked like he was maybe 22, rocking back and forth in his chair rubbing his leg and nervously talking to this girl who seemed to have no interest in talking to him, about all of his problems in the public library. He just couldn’t sit still. When he wasn’t rubbing his leg he was tapping his computer so no matter what I did to block him out wasn’t enough.
I am sorry you’re life is going to shit but why are you doing this in public? You came to the library to get work done. I know this because you literally said this to the girl who didn’t want to hear your problems. So why are you pushing off doing your work to tell her about how you failed an exam. It was only hurting your relationship. She told you a number of times she had to get back to work but you kept pushing to keep the conversation going so you could almost brag to her about what a loser you’ve been this week.
Do you feel better now? Like is there something therapeutic about telling your problems to another person at a volume the whole world can hear? Why did I get a dirty look for looking at him too? I mean he was being so loud I had to put headphones in and he looked at me like I was trying to eavesdrop on him.
Nobody wanted to hear your problems, you just decided to make this place your living room. So I am here asking for anyone who is an expert on the subject. Why do people air their personal laundry to the public? Why do people feel comfortable talking about failing exams, breakups, wanting to “hook up” when they get back home. I mean GAG! I don’t care if you’ve been thinking about her body all day. Text her that shit, don’t skype it. It was beginning to feel like you were trying to get a Skype sex session going by the time she finally hung up on you.
So please help me understand why people feel the need to make their problems the world? I’m not talking about people who write blogs, tweets or put out Youtube videos. I’m not talking about people who put deliberate thought into posting things online for the public eye. I’m talking about people who treat the world like it’s their house. The ones who take their shoes off at the library, who text during movies, who talk loud on their cell phone then look at you like you’re the problem when you plug your ears.
Trust
“When trust is absent, all kinds of societal woes unfold — including violence, social chaos and paralyzing risk-aversion.”
The Fate of Online Trust in the Next Decade
It seems like for every invention there are a million people thinking of ways to corrupt it. Maybe innovation has peaked and all we can hope for now is more innovative ways to steal, cheat, and lie. Not to take a punch at any products, but every year we are led to believe the world is going to be changed by the latest innovation of certain smartphones, only to discover they changed the camera and maybe one other feature.
Not exactly earth shattering, but I digress. The point of this post is not to talk about our lack of creativity, but rather our lack of trust. Though I do think those concepts belong together, for trust leads to progress. Trust leads to cooperation of different beliefs, which can work together to build something.
Even if individuals do not trust one another, if they can find an underlying similarity, like a desire to work in a completely transparent environment, then trust no longer acts as a hinderence and progress can flourish.
The only way for us to survive is to trust our fellow man to some capacity. For example, if trust doesn’t exist than everyone will be trying to get away with as much immoral activity as they can without being caught. More lawyers will have to sit in on meanings and look for loopholes invisible to the untrained eye, because both parties are assuming the other is looking to get away with something and will do their best to get away with as much as possible.
This is why the quote at the top stood out to me so much. A lack of trust can completely paralyze a community (both macro and micro). We are all risk averse to some capacity, some more than others. If there is no trust amongst consumers and producers, business owners and customers, even neighbors, we will be too scared to make any decisions in our life because the perceived risk will be too great and the returns will be what we consider normal today.
Look at a polarized outcome of a world where there is absolutely no trust. No friendships, or relationships beyond acquaintances because we assume any interaction is strictly to better their current situation with no care of how it affects our situation.
Going to the store becomes a calculated risk because stop signs and red lights act more as suggestions, since we cannot trust people to follow the rules. They will not trust anyone else to, or for anyone else to get punished for their actions so why should they?
Even once they get to the store they will not be able to trust the cashier to not pocket extra cash from them, since a world with no trust would not allow credit. Lenders would not trust borrowers to pay their loans back.
From the opposite side of this business transaction, businessmen and women would struggle to hire anyone out of fear of being robbed after every transaction.
They’d have to spend copious amounts of money on new security and install it themselves because customers would try to steal as much as possible.
I apologize for the rambling but you can see how this hypothetical is never ending and can always be dug a little deeper. Almost every interaction we make on a daily basis is made with some capacity of trust and the recent polarization of the country is harming that. Progress can only occur with trust and currently that is depleting at a rapid pace.
The Fate of Online Trust in the Next Decade
It seems like for every invention there are a million people thinking of ways to corrupt it. Maybe innovation has peaked and all we can hope for now is more innovative ways to steal, cheat, and lie. Not to take a punch at any products, but every year we are led to believe the world is going to be changed by the latest innovation of certain smartphones, only to discover they changed the camera and maybe one other feature.
Not exactly earth shattering, but I digress. The point of this post is not to talk about our lack of creativity, but rather our lack of trust. Though I do think those concepts belong together, for trust leads to progress. Trust leads to cooperation of different beliefs, which can work together to build something.
Even if individuals do not trust one another, if they can find an underlying similarity, like a desire to work in a completely transparent environment, then trust no longer acts as a hinderence and progress can flourish.
The only way for us to survive is to trust our fellow man to some capacity. For example, if trust doesn’t exist than everyone will be trying to get away with as much immoral activity as they can without being caught. More lawyers will have to sit in on meanings and look for loopholes invisible to the untrained eye, because both parties are assuming the other is looking to get away with something and will do their best to get away with as much as possible.
This is why the quote at the top stood out to me so much. A lack of trust can completely paralyze a community (both macro and micro). We are all risk averse to some capacity, some more than others. If there is no trust amongst consumers and producers, business owners and customers, even neighbors, we will be too scared to make any decisions in our life because the perceived risk will be too great and the returns will be what we consider normal today.
Look at a polarized outcome of a world where there is absolutely no trust. No friendships, or relationships beyond acquaintances because we assume any interaction is strictly to better their current situation with no care of how it affects our situation.
Going to the store becomes a calculated risk because stop signs and red lights act more as suggestions, since we cannot trust people to follow the rules. They will not trust anyone else to, or for anyone else to get punished for their actions so why should they?
Even once they get to the store they will not be able to trust the cashier to not pocket extra cash from them, since a world with no trust would not allow credit. Lenders would not trust borrowers to pay their loans back.
From the opposite side of this business transaction, businessmen and women would struggle to hire anyone out of fear of being robbed after every transaction.
They’d have to spend copious amounts of money on new security and install it themselves because customers would try to steal as much as possible.
I apologize for the rambling but you can see how this hypothetical is never ending and can always be dug a little deeper. Almost every interaction we make on a daily basis is made with some capacity of trust and the recent polarization of the country is harming that. Progress can only occur with trust and currently that is depleting at a rapid pace.
December 5, 2017
All You Need Is. . . Well A Lot
“To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone.” Reba McEntire
Don’t crucify me, but I am not completely familiar with McEntire’s work. I came across this quote on social media, immediately looked her up and found out she is a country singer. Maybe I’ve been wrong for neglecting country music all these years, but that’s a discussion for a later date.
For now I just want to focus on this quote, because it really stuck with me. When I read it I see the three things McEntire is talking about as hope, courage, and a sense of humor. The last of these three is important for our endurance.
Like many people I have faced my fair share of failures in life. It could be small ones like not making the varsity lacrosse team my sophomore year of high school; larger ones like not getting the job I wanted out of undergrad; and ones I expected like never getting a response from Zoe Kravitz on social media.
These three “bones” as McEntire phrases it are what gives us our drive, our courage, and our ability to try again when things get tough. Because humor really does serve an important purpose. When we are feeling down about our circumstances, that one thing that can always make us forget about our problems is laughter.
I know this isn’t the case for everyone but when people try to comfort me by matching my miserableness, we end up just wallowing in company and neither one of us feel better. I know some people just need a friend, but if I’m hovering over a rejection letter from an agency that was supposed to give me my big break, I don’t want a friend to tell me about all the times they failed in life. I want laughter dammit!
It’s why after every break up I have a comedy break up movie at the ready. No way am I watching Marley and Me when a girl rips my heart out. I’m watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall and I am going to be Jason Siegel for the evening.
So find hope because it will open a world to you you never thought was possible. Use that wishbone to pursue a dream, because what’s the point of life it you aren’t doing everything in your power to pursue your dreams.
Use your backbone to stand up to the hardships. Face down the adversities and climb the obstacles standing in your way because nothing worth getting was ever easy.
Finally the funny bone. Find and keep that sense of humor because unless you were kissed by God you’re going to fail and you’re going to need to laugh it off because laughing it off is the only way you’ll ever try again. Fear’s greatest enemy is laughter and as long as you can laugh at yourself you’ll drive out the fear telling you to give up.
So thank you Reba. In your honor I will listen to country music tonight, laugh at all the silly mistakes I’ve made recently, and get back to pursuing my dream tomorrow.
Don’t crucify me, but I am not completely familiar with McEntire’s work. I came across this quote on social media, immediately looked her up and found out she is a country singer. Maybe I’ve been wrong for neglecting country music all these years, but that’s a discussion for a later date.
For now I just want to focus on this quote, because it really stuck with me. When I read it I see the three things McEntire is talking about as hope, courage, and a sense of humor. The last of these three is important for our endurance.
Like many people I have faced my fair share of failures in life. It could be small ones like not making the varsity lacrosse team my sophomore year of high school; larger ones like not getting the job I wanted out of undergrad; and ones I expected like never getting a response from Zoe Kravitz on social media.
These three “bones” as McEntire phrases it are what gives us our drive, our courage, and our ability to try again when things get tough. Because humor really does serve an important purpose. When we are feeling down about our circumstances, that one thing that can always make us forget about our problems is laughter.
I know this isn’t the case for everyone but when people try to comfort me by matching my miserableness, we end up just wallowing in company and neither one of us feel better. I know some people just need a friend, but if I’m hovering over a rejection letter from an agency that was supposed to give me my big break, I don’t want a friend to tell me about all the times they failed in life. I want laughter dammit!
It’s why after every break up I have a comedy break up movie at the ready. No way am I watching Marley and Me when a girl rips my heart out. I’m watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall and I am going to be Jason Siegel for the evening.
So find hope because it will open a world to you you never thought was possible. Use that wishbone to pursue a dream, because what’s the point of life it you aren’t doing everything in your power to pursue your dreams.
Use your backbone to stand up to the hardships. Face down the adversities and climb the obstacles standing in your way because nothing worth getting was ever easy.
Finally the funny bone. Find and keep that sense of humor because unless you were kissed by God you’re going to fail and you’re going to need to laugh it off because laughing it off is the only way you’ll ever try again. Fear’s greatest enemy is laughter and as long as you can laugh at yourself you’ll drive out the fear telling you to give up.
So thank you Reba. In your honor I will listen to country music tonight, laugh at all the silly mistakes I’ve made recently, and get back to pursuing my dream tomorrow.
Being Right or Being Healthy
On the heels of President Trump publicly endorsing Roy Moore I find myself angrier than usual. The blatant disregard for human decency is shocking and is making me question whether there really is a future that heals this country.
Personally, I am struggling with forgiving those who still maintain, or only recently renounced Donald Trump (and the GOP as a whole for supporting him). I find myself holding a lot of negative feelings towards people as of late, and it all comes down to the question of what’s more important, for them to admit they are wrong, which may only happen when the country completely collapses, or for them to go on and live long happy lives in ignorance.
It is a frustrating internal dialogue to have, particularly when you make these arguments against amalgams of all trump supporters projected on to one faceless mentally created debate opponent.
Take your pick for what you want to be right about in this current administration. There are so many options. The tax bill that was just rushed through, the blatant disregard for science in concerns for global warming, even the access hollywood tapes are now being questioned (Trump is literally denying it was him despite earlier claiming it was all just locker room talk).
Anyway, I find myself very unhappy with my thoughts as of late, because the truth of the matter is I want to be right. Let me correct that because I know based on empirical evidence and current data I am right. What I mean is I want those in my life who are currently cheering for the destruction of mankind, siding with white supremacists, and defending our toddler and chief to admit they were wrong.
It makes me feel gross and petty but I want them to know just how wrong they were. I want them to feel the consequences of their decisions, to be granted visions from the God they claim to love and see how the future turns out on the current trajectory we are riding.
I want them to admit they were wrong, even though in this case it could quite literally mean life or death. I mean I just feel disgusting about it all. I know my goals should be fighting for a better world and protecting those I can but really I’m finding myself not wanting to protect those who were duped. I want them to feel the consequences of their decisions.
Personally, I am struggling with forgiving those who still maintain, or only recently renounced Donald Trump (and the GOP as a whole for supporting him). I find myself holding a lot of negative feelings towards people as of late, and it all comes down to the question of what’s more important, for them to admit they are wrong, which may only happen when the country completely collapses, or for them to go on and live long happy lives in ignorance.
It is a frustrating internal dialogue to have, particularly when you make these arguments against amalgams of all trump supporters projected on to one faceless mentally created debate opponent.
Take your pick for what you want to be right about in this current administration. There are so many options. The tax bill that was just rushed through, the blatant disregard for science in concerns for global warming, even the access hollywood tapes are now being questioned (Trump is literally denying it was him despite earlier claiming it was all just locker room talk).
Anyway, I find myself very unhappy with my thoughts as of late, because the truth of the matter is I want to be right. Let me correct that because I know based on empirical evidence and current data I am right. What I mean is I want those in my life who are currently cheering for the destruction of mankind, siding with white supremacists, and defending our toddler and chief to admit they were wrong.
It makes me feel gross and petty but I want them to know just how wrong they were. I want them to feel the consequences of their decisions, to be granted visions from the God they claim to love and see how the future turns out on the current trajectory we are riding.
I want them to admit they were wrong, even though in this case it could quite literally mean life or death. I mean I just feel disgusting about it all. I know my goals should be fighting for a better world and protecting those I can but really I’m finding myself not wanting to protect those who were duped. I want them to feel the consequences of their decisions.
November 26, 2017
Nah Not Today
Back to the old grindstone. I guess that's what it's called, though for me the old grindstone is a Macbook. I don't know if that makes me more preppy or hipster, but I know it eats up more than a weeks pay at my day job, but who needs electricity or heating anyway? As long as I have a cellphone plan, a Kindle, and a little Netflix every night before bed the rest of life just falls into place.
Kinda funny how living the life of a "bum" today would be living the life of an elite only a couple decades ago. I use bum loosely here, and more in the sense of an insult than someone's actual social class. For example this asshole at the movie theater tonight who couldn't stop talking to his family while I was trying to enjoy Wonder is a bum, even though I caught a glimpse of his Rolex when I turned around to shush him.
As for me, I'm the bum who thought he was destined for great things, because in our heads we are always the heroes who win, but now feel like I'm growing up to be the loser in high school everyone imagined me to be. Sorta sucks, sorta liberating, but mostly sucks. I mean you can say you don't care what other people think in the mirror a million times and it would just be a million lies. Sure some people find that elusive enlightenment that makes words bounce off them as easily as rubber on concrete, but for the rest of us mere mortals, even the slightest giggle in our direction makes our skin crawl.
I write cause it's my passion; I just wanna make that clear before I go on joking about a bunch of other reasons I write because I know they're coming, but in reality I would not have started this journey of an unsuccessful and mostly anonymous life if it wasn't for the love of it; because despite what our favorite authors make us believe is possible, for the most part just becoming a middle-class author is considered the greatest achievement we can hope for.
At least that's where I'm at now. No delusions of grandeur or prophecies of greatness. It's not that I'll ever stop striving for it but fuck it's tough to truly believe you're gonna be that generational talent. After all that's one of the only ways to make people outside of the literary world care. Either break down the walls of commercial success or literary success.
My first full length novel is complete. It's over 60 thousand words and action packed so I know at the very least no one will be bored while reading it. It sucks at the moment but once I rewrite it I'm sure it'll become readable.
Until that time I have a novelette I hope to put out, which is a satire on electronics controlling our lives; I know it's not very original but it's a story that never gets old.
I also began working on my second full length novel, which to be honest doesn't have much direction yet. I have three characters who are getting extremely fleshed out and the novel is practically writing itself. I had a general idea and just ran with it. I'm also focusing on not being so purple with my prose. When I find myself going on for over a paragraph about the loneliness of a character's existence, I either introduce an action, dialogue, or a new character.
It's funny, one of my favorite smaller characters at the moment is the estranged mother of one of the main characters. She started off with no voice whatsoever but is now sort of turning into Sheila Jackson from Shameless, except with way more direct anger towards her son.
I'm grinning as I'm telling you about this. That's why I know I'll always be a writer no matter what, it's what I truly love to do. If only I were better at it or writing scripts. If I were rubbing elbows with A-listers it wouldn't matter how shitty my writing is, high school throwbacks would think I was the shit. Unfortunately that's the lens I see my life through at the moment; what would the old gang from high school think. I check in on them from time to time (as do my characters in this new book) just to see how I measure up. I'm far from the bottom but fuck I feel far from the top too. If I can't even be the coolest person at the reunion, how can I be the coolest person in history? Probably should start with a wardrobe change, maybe just buy one suit lol.
This whole perspective thing is a real piece of work. You could be having the worst day of your life, look down at that sirloin you're about to eat and realize no matter what it'll never get that bad; then you just feel like shit for having a complaint in your life because it's so easy to find someone worse off. For the most part, our events are the greatest experiences in our households, mean very little to our neighbors, less to our city, and statistically non-existent in the world. It's reminders like these to not take life so seriously that opens me to the possibility and opportunity of pursuing my passion and saying fuck off to those memories of the kids from high school who may be looking at my facebook profile and laughing cause I'm not currently paying my dues for some fortune 500 company or starting a small business.
"Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive." -Elbert Hubbard
Kinda funny how living the life of a "bum" today would be living the life of an elite only a couple decades ago. I use bum loosely here, and more in the sense of an insult than someone's actual social class. For example this asshole at the movie theater tonight who couldn't stop talking to his family while I was trying to enjoy Wonder is a bum, even though I caught a glimpse of his Rolex when I turned around to shush him.
As for me, I'm the bum who thought he was destined for great things, because in our heads we are always the heroes who win, but now feel like I'm growing up to be the loser in high school everyone imagined me to be. Sorta sucks, sorta liberating, but mostly sucks. I mean you can say you don't care what other people think in the mirror a million times and it would just be a million lies. Sure some people find that elusive enlightenment that makes words bounce off them as easily as rubber on concrete, but for the rest of us mere mortals, even the slightest giggle in our direction makes our skin crawl.
I write cause it's my passion; I just wanna make that clear before I go on joking about a bunch of other reasons I write because I know they're coming, but in reality I would not have started this journey of an unsuccessful and mostly anonymous life if it wasn't for the love of it; because despite what our favorite authors make us believe is possible, for the most part just becoming a middle-class author is considered the greatest achievement we can hope for.
At least that's where I'm at now. No delusions of grandeur or prophecies of greatness. It's not that I'll ever stop striving for it but fuck it's tough to truly believe you're gonna be that generational talent. After all that's one of the only ways to make people outside of the literary world care. Either break down the walls of commercial success or literary success.
My first full length novel is complete. It's over 60 thousand words and action packed so I know at the very least no one will be bored while reading it. It sucks at the moment but once I rewrite it I'm sure it'll become readable.
Until that time I have a novelette I hope to put out, which is a satire on electronics controlling our lives; I know it's not very original but it's a story that never gets old.
I also began working on my second full length novel, which to be honest doesn't have much direction yet. I have three characters who are getting extremely fleshed out and the novel is practically writing itself. I had a general idea and just ran with it. I'm also focusing on not being so purple with my prose. When I find myself going on for over a paragraph about the loneliness of a character's existence, I either introduce an action, dialogue, or a new character.
It's funny, one of my favorite smaller characters at the moment is the estranged mother of one of the main characters. She started off with no voice whatsoever but is now sort of turning into Sheila Jackson from Shameless, except with way more direct anger towards her son.
I'm grinning as I'm telling you about this. That's why I know I'll always be a writer no matter what, it's what I truly love to do. If only I were better at it or writing scripts. If I were rubbing elbows with A-listers it wouldn't matter how shitty my writing is, high school throwbacks would think I was the shit. Unfortunately that's the lens I see my life through at the moment; what would the old gang from high school think. I check in on them from time to time (as do my characters in this new book) just to see how I measure up. I'm far from the bottom but fuck I feel far from the top too. If I can't even be the coolest person at the reunion, how can I be the coolest person in history? Probably should start with a wardrobe change, maybe just buy one suit lol.
This whole perspective thing is a real piece of work. You could be having the worst day of your life, look down at that sirloin you're about to eat and realize no matter what it'll never get that bad; then you just feel like shit for having a complaint in your life because it's so easy to find someone worse off. For the most part, our events are the greatest experiences in our households, mean very little to our neighbors, less to our city, and statistically non-existent in the world. It's reminders like these to not take life so seriously that opens me to the possibility and opportunity of pursuing my passion and saying fuck off to those memories of the kids from high school who may be looking at my facebook profile and laughing cause I'm not currently paying my dues for some fortune 500 company or starting a small business.
"Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive." -Elbert Hubbard
New Blog Who This?
I swear I'm not some self-obsessed narcissist who's unable to go ten minutes without checking himself out in the mirror. As a matter of fact, I hate mirrors, and if I were really looking to put my fac
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