R. Cooper's Blog, page 19

The Natalie Wood escandelo will never end! Now I need to ...

The Natalie Wood escandelo will never end! Now I need to rewatch "Inside Daisy Clover" or something to watch Robert Redford "not" be Robert Wagner.

...Will is so excited.

...Yes, I know he's fictional, but still, he's excited.

Lookit! Cover!

I really wasn't expecting a cover, not for a little novella that's part of the Advent Calender, but I got one. Cover! Cookies!

Cover! With Cookies!

It's just not Christmas if you aren't forced to make cookies at some point. (Okay, this is blatantly untrue, but just the same, trust me, I will end up making cookies for gifts for people some time in December.)


A Wealth of Unsaid Words $3.99

By R. Cooper

Alex has always known his bipolar disorder made him too flawed for his boyhood hero, Everett. So when his feelings for Everett became overwhelming, he forced a separation that saddened them both but gave Alex the clarity he needed. Now a year has passed, and he and Everett are together again when Everett's noisy, imperfect family reunites for Christmas, pulling Alex into their chaotic warmth the way they always have. Can Everett convince Alex that, in spite of his fears, starting a relationship would make for the perfect holiday?

Categories: Advent Calendar 2011, Novella, Holiday, R. Cooper

Comes out, what? December 1, I believe.



Oh damn. Now I want cookies. And I really need a foodporn icon for my livejournal. Hmm.

the new gmail

I like how the people at gmail decided that using words to describe things was too much of a hassle, so they just went with pictures instead. Very Ancient Egypt of you, Google. You're right, a weird crooked arrow is much clearer than the word "reply". You've really simplified everything, or dumbed it down, whatever.

In a totally different tone...

Because sinjah requested orgasm denial with the boys. Aw. It's um...weird. I didn't really have a plan when I started it. Oh well. Smut.



"Charlie." Will was getting more urgent the longer Charlie spent away from him. It was oddly satisfying to hear his voice tremble and rise when Charlie didn't answer right away. "Charlie you can't be serious."

There had been a time when Charlie would have been shocked at his somewhat vicious impulse to leave Will hanging like this, to make him wait like this, but Will's enthusiasm for those impulses had taken care of his lingering concerns that he was going too far or that he'd hurt Will.

Will, as he'd learned over time, liked being hurt a little and was even fonder of pushing Charlie's buttons to see what Charlie could come up with to punish him. Still, Charlie was sure he hadn't been expecting this.

He looked at Will, stretched out diagonally across the bed on his back, his arms still trapped in the sleeves of his shirt and held in place where Charlie had looped it around the footboard of their bed. His pants had been removed some time ago, quickly, easily, with Will's cooperation. Anything, he'd promised breathlessly, saying it honestly, seductively, knowing it would drive Charlie crazy. He'd say anything to get Charlie's hands or mouth on him, do anything to finish what he'd started in the middle of the party today.

"Oh no," Charlie told him, letting his voice be rough, letting Will see how he was staring at him. He moved, taking moments longer than he needed to deal with the cuffs of his shirt. Will's expression as he watched was a combination of stunned and stupidly horny. Charlie looked away from his flushed face and parted lips and concentrated on rolling up his sleeves.

Will made a low, pained sound of approval. "Charlie, come on. Please."

Charlie couldn't help a glance down at Will's cock, hard and flushed and shining wetly with his own spit. He turned his head away to lick his lips.

"A child's birthday party?" His voice was rough, but he didn't care. "You couldn't wait?"

"Charlie." When he turned back to him, Will's eyes were wide and fixed on his. He was panting, his chest heaving with whatever he wasn't saying. "I was bored."

Bored. Charlie almost repeated it. As if being bored justified teasing him the way he had in front of his family. He hadn't done anything too obvious, not in front of the children, but there were only so many times Charlie could take Will touching him and rubbing against him "accidentally" before he'd had to do something about it.

"Are you bored now?" Charlie rolled up his sleeves and adjusted himself through his pants. He let his hand linger when Will's gaze followed the motion and Will let out another small, hurt sound.

He shook his head. "No, Charlie."

That was good to hear. Charlie nodded and bent down, offering a small reward with his tongue. Will jerked and then arched his hips up, whining when Charlie pulled back.

Charlie swallowed and put a hand to his dick again. It was almost not a joke to say this hurt him as much as it hurt Will. But Will sucked in air and shifted, his feet sliding over the bedding before one foot slid off the bed. He spread his legs, not quite rolling himself over to press himself into the bedding, but tempted, Charlie could tell.

It said a lot that he knew to hold still, that he still was, when Charlie hadn't said a word about it.

Charlie undid his zipper, pulling it down slowly and blushing hotly as he did, not that Will seemed to see. His eyes went to Charlie's hand, his crotch, and he moaned out his name as Charlie pulled his dick out.

Charlie almost closed his eyes. It felt good, after waiting so long, after how Will had wound him up on purpose that afternoon, but he couldn't give in, not yet.

Will had been waiting almost as long, longer, if Charlie counted when Will had first planned on tormenting him in front of witnesses, and Charlie did. It was for that reason that he licked his palm and began to slowly stroke himself.

A few minutes before he'd had Will tied up and at his mercy and he'd been wetly sucking his cock, one hand on his stomach to hold him down as he'd promised Will relief, and then, when Will had been shaking and his balls had been tight and he'd been so close to coming, Charlie had pulled back, left him there, aching.

His heart beat faster at the memory, Will's cries for him, the desperate motions of his hips that he couldn't stop, the trembling in his arms as he'd struggled against his bonds for a moment. It was a lot like Will now, only now Will was frozen, eyes locked on Charlie's hand, on what he was doing.

It was the kind of thing Will would do, more than a little exhibitionist and flagrant. Obvious. Taunting. Only Will would have done it to bring Charlie to him. Charlie had a completely different reason.

"Charlie, Charlie, Charlie," Will was repeating his name in quiet shock, he didn't even seem aware he was doing it, or how he was wetting his mouth and moving his hips in time to each long stroke. "You aren't." He couldn't seem to believe it. Later, much later, Will would tease him about it, but not now. Now Will couldn't seem to take it.

"I am." Charlie almost didn't know his own voice. Will's shiver went down his whole body.

"Please," he was begging, but Charlie shook his head.

"I've waited long enough," he wanted to say, but the way Will stared at him, with so much need and desperation, made his throat tight. He was pretty sure Will got the point anyway. Will let his head fall back as he watched, all of him exposed and there for Charlie's pleasure. He started to move his hand faster. Will's hoarse breathing matched his, quick and uneven, for all that Will's eyes were still so wide, not missing a thing.

"Please, Charlie." He didn't know what Will was begging for, wasn't sure that Will did either, but when Will licked his mouth and looked up into his face, looked at him with that frantic hunger making his color high and his gaze desperate, Charlie climbed over him, not enough to give Will any friction, just enough to feel his heat and his skin and how Will was almost vibrating.

"Please," he said it again, and low and sweet as he hadn't said it at the party, pleading for it, and Charlie groaned and came across his chest, splashing come onto his face, in his mouth.

If Will's purr was anything it was grateful. But he narrowed his eyes as he licked seed from his mouth, as he swallowed. "Oh you're mean to me, Daddy," he breathed, as if he understood what Charlie had done, that now that Charlie had come, he could devote more time to punishing Will, driving him crazy but not letting him come, not until he wanted him to.

The words weren't angry, not even a little bit, and Charlie offered him that same reward, sliding his body down until his feet were on the floor and he was once again bent over Will with his mouth near his cock. He liked how Will's breath picked up again, how he twisted and arched from the bed to display his chest covered in Charlie's come.

"So you don't mind waiting?" Charlie murmured, his mouth at Will's thigh, then at his hip.

Will quickly shook his head, trembling as he fought the urge to move, groaning when Charlie put a hand to his side to hold him down anyway.
Charlie moved his head so that the head of Will's dick slid against his lips, then took himself away again before coming back to work his tongue there, sucking it into his mouth for another moment's torture.

"Oh Charlie," Will moaned, impossibly pleased and he struggled to push himself up, to make Charlie blow him until he came. "You are so good to me."

Natalie Wood, Natalie Wood. A bday present to everyone.

I meant this to be a fluffy, cute little piece in honor of my bday (though I'm not Will's age) but it went slightly angsty on me.






"Will." Charlie spoke softly, aware that how this morning went was going to be tricky. Will, or the shape under the comforter and the afghan that Ann had knitted them, moved slightly but didn't answer. Charlie hid a sigh and came closer.

It really wasn't cold enough to justify how Will had covered himself in the blankets and curled up onto his side. The heater had been on all night and anyway, Sam was at Will's feet as his own personal, purring foot warmer. But then, Charlie reflected with a faint smile that Will wouldn't see, this wasn't about the late winter chill.

"Will." He tried again as he sat carefully on the edge of the bed. "I know you're awake."

"If I'm awake, then this day is really happening." It was muffled against the pillow, but Charlie was pretty sure that that was what Will had said. His smile got wider. If Will had poked his head out from the blankets to see, he would have had something to say about it, but he didn't, so Charlie felt safe in letting his smile stay. He'd known this was going to be difficult, hopefully he'd prepared enough.

"Your sister is coming over this afternoon, remember? You'll have to get up by then. And we're supposed to go out tonight, your friends are doing something."

Will's answer was even more muffled this time. Just the same, Charlie was certain he'd caught the word, "dying" in there. He frowned.

"Excuse me?"

There was a very loud sigh.

"It doesn't matter. I'm dying. The end is near, Charlie, I can feel it."

"I..." Charlie really didn't know how to answer that. For a moment he fought the urge to laugh and then he cleared his throat. He banished all his amusement and kept his tone serious. "You're dying?"

For someone who had managed to speak clearly through several layers of blankets, Will was suddenly mumbling again. He shifted a little too, or squirmed.

"I didn't catch that." Charlie was as dry as he could be though he had a feeling he knew what this was about. Will had been fretting quietly about odd things for the past month and positively freaking out all week. The color of his hair, wearing more sunblock, joining a real gym, eating less sugar and carbs. There were new skin creams on the shelf above the sink. And that was nothing to the way he'd been watching Charlie, as though he couldn't take his eye off him for a second.

Will had his jealous moments, but it wasn't like him to be so...possessive. Clingy. Insecure. Charlie didn't care for any of those words and felt a small measure of guilt for even thinking them.

"I'm old." Will's horror transmitted through goose down and the soft yarn of the afghan. Charlie's frown became a deep scowl. He wasn't surprised, but...

"You're old," he repeated flatly. He'd known Will had feared this particular birthday, but that was just a little insulting considering Charlie was several years past it himself. "I'm older than you."

Will tried to hide his response in another mumble, but Charlie leaned in and heard it this time.

"It's different for you. You age sexy." Will huffed and shifted. "I'm going to get wrinkles and gain weight no matter what I do from now on and you..." He stopped, probably becoming aware of how ridiculous he sounded. Or not.

"...You won't want me anymore," Will finished quietly and Charlie sat up and stared blankly at the outline of Will.

He'd expected some comments about getting old from Will. No matter how much Will had prepared himself, he still considered thirty a big deal. But he hadn't expected that.

Charlie was touched and hurt and...really angry actually. He narrowed his eyes.

"Because that's the only reason I keep you around is that it?" He used that voice on Will, the one Will deserved right now, the one that meant punishment. Will went still. "That's what you think of me after everything?"

"No!" It was emphatic and probably sincere and yet Will didn't pull the blankets down.

"Will."

"I just..." If Will had been out of the blankets, his hands would have been flying all over the place. "I want to... I want to be... I don't want you to get bored with me."

"Bored?" Surprise made Charlie sound breathless. It was hard to tell how Will had meant that, but he'd obviously been worrying about it for a while. "You think I would leave you?"

The strangest thing about Will was how Charlie knew he should find statements like that irritating. Instead he just felt warmer than he should for a man who'd run across the freezing early morning courtyard in his slippers before trying to drag Will out of bed.

Will's reply was a miserable head nod.

"Over some wrinkles?" It was difficult not to call Will a little idiot, or pull him closer to spank some sense into him. Charlie shook his head. "Well I'm not going to, and I have some proof for you, but you'll have to come out of the blankets to see it."

"Proof?" Will only hesitated a moment before asking. He seemed...curious. Charlie's smile returned. "Are you naked? Because I will accept that as a birthday present."

"Up or you get nothing." Charlie had to be firm. Anything else Will was hinting for would have to wait until he was sure Will was okay.

There was a long, uncertain moment and then Will rolled over. A second later and he shoved the blankets down enough to give Charlie an offended look. His hair was a mess and he must have put some mask on last night as part of his new anti-aging routine because there were green flecks of dried clay around his ears and on his forehead. The green almost matched his eyes.

"You're right. You look terrible. I should leave you right now." Charlie was close to sticking his tongue out.

"You aren't funny." Will's hands found the edge of the blankets and pulled anxiously. "We can't all age like you."

Considering Charlie was in pain most when it was cold out and it was only getting worse as he got older, he hoped not. But he leaned in anyway and planted a kiss over some pretty foul-tasting green clay and then sat back up.

"Happy Birthday."

"Those words!" Will howled dramatically, if quietly, at the ceiling and made a stubborn face. "I was promised proof, Charlie."

"Ah." Charlie wiped at his face, suddenly nervous that he'd done the wrong thing, but it was too late now for second thoughts. He leaned down to the side of the bed and picked up the sock-lined open shoebox and placed it almost under Will's nose so that he and the kitten inside where almost face to face.

He coughed a few times while the two of them stared at each other. "I know you love Sam, but I thought you might like a cat of your own. It's a girl, and she doesn't have a name yet though I've been calling her Natalie." Will, briefly, looked up at him. Charlie hurried on. "I had Mrs. Brown watch her for me last night so she'd be a surprise, but if you think she's too much or you don't want her--"

"Not want her?" Will gasped and then reached out to carefully scratch between her eyes. He got swiped at for a moment, but he didn't seem to mind, and after a few seconds, Little Natalie seemed fine with the attention. Charlie let out a slow, relieved breath. Giving Will something else to focus on was always a good idea.

"This isn't really proof you know," Will offered softly after several minutes of making his new kitten purr so loud that Sam came over to investigate. It was a good thing Charlie had thought to introduce the two of them yesterday so nothing would spoil the mood now.

But he frowned lightly and met Will's stare. Will was serious. "I know that doesn't really exist like I know that you love me. I don't mean to be stupid."

Charlie nodded. He didn't need Will around to help him take care of another cat and they both knew it.

"It's not stupid," he answered instead of admitting that and Will wrinkled his nose at him but stayed where he was. He still wasn't sure and Charlie knew how that kind of uncertainty could feel.

He frowned and then moved, pushing the shoebox off the bed once Will pulled the kitten to his chest and kicking off his slippers before he tugged some of the covers up and over them both.

He shifted until his head was on the pillow and his cold feet were under the spot where Sam had been. Then he sighed.

"Actually staying in bed a while longer sounds good."

"It sounds like something old people would do," Will protested, watching him for a moment longer before letting Natalie go so she could go over and sniff Sam.

"Too bad we're both so old." Charlie smiled. Will squinted at him, then gave up pretending to be angry and flung a leg over one of his. His hand started wandering.

"Well let me know when you start needing little blue pills," he murmured, and then laughed at Charlie's scowl. As if he would with Will doing that. "You know, you getting naked is still acceptable as another present. Just saying."

Charlie let out a huff.

"How many presents do you need?" But he was already wriggling to remove his jeans.

"Oh a ton," Will nodded before slipping back under the covers to help him, and knocking over two very affronted cats at the same time. "Charlie, I'm thirty today."

Caffeine! Why for you no work?

I've been going through personal drama and issues and haven't written anything in forever and now I really need to and I don't know what to do. I was considering doing an unofficial Nano this year (unofficial, because I am unsure of my work schedule) but that means plotting out something, and I'm stuck between 1960's awkward virgins story or alternate history/steampunk sequel/prequel to "Let There Be Light" thing...but I don't know if I'm ready for that one yet.

And the coffee isn't helping me focus. Like at all. I want to do them both...at then I worry that they were too traditional or boring I don't know.

I need to feel...need. I need some need. A spark of interest in anything.

But ooh, I submitted Charlie and Will to DS. We will see if they want them. I suppose they are a mess. (Aw, a mess like Charlie) Meanwhile, I used a pretty fanart of Will that dreamsparkle3 did for my Facebook profile pic so she made some fanart for me, Charlie and Will at Christmas (Just like Will to snuggle while Charlie is trying to read).

I can has Facebook? Mah Facebook!I am not sure what I wil...

I can has Facebook?


Mah Facebook!

I am not sure what I will do with it, but friend me if you want and we will see together. :)

painfully smitten

Well look at that.

I'll Be Home For Christmas Daily Dose Advent Calender.

It's up already. Someday I really need money so I can treat myself to things like this.

I am looking over the other stories now...I don't know the authors, but the descriptions are hitting some of my kinks. I mean,
Second Serve $1.49 By G.S. Wiley

Michael Morgan, former top-seeded Australian tennis player, is long-since retired. When his former rival—and former one night stand—Arkady Yemelyanev comes to Sydney and asks him to play in a Christmas Eve exhibition match, Michael is forced to come to terms with the fact that he will never again be a top professional player—and that lovers last longer than rivals.

Professional Rivals! Tension yay!

And THIS:

The Winter Courtship Rituals of Fur-Bearing Critters $3.99

By Amy Lane

Rance Crawford is an alpaca rancher, fiber mill owner, and self-proclaimed grumpy bastard. When sweet, charming tenderfoot Ben McCutcheon moves onto Crawford's rural road, Rance is very aware that Ben makes it a grand total of two gay men in their tiny town, and even though he is instantly, painfully smitten, any move he makes could be simply chalked up to being hard up. Using his best weapon and favorite skill, Crawford launches an awkward, wordless effort to make sure Ben is kept warm during the cold Colorado winter, every last piece of him—especially his heart.

Dude. You had me at "painfully smitten". I am serious. Those words are like chocolate to my soul.

Maybe in between holiday craziness I will have time to read them. And the money. Hmm.

Also, here is mine,

A Wealth of Unsaid Words $3.99

By R. Cooper (That's me!)

Alex has always known his bipolar disorder made him too flawed for his boyhood hero, Everett. So when his feelings for Everett became overwhelming, he forced a separation that saddened them both but gave Alex the clarity he needed. Now a year has passed, and he and Everett are together again when Everett's noisy, imperfect family reunites for Christmas, pulling Alex into their chaotic warmth the way they always have. Can Everett convince Alex that, in spite of his fears, starting a relationship would make for the perfect holiday?


Yeah, they said Christmas and I thought...bipolar disorder. Like you do. Um...there's a tree? And cookies! Soooo many cookies! There's even cookies on the cover. (It gets its own cover!) Little heart cookies! I had to make sugar cookies to celebrate! :) And then I ate them all. :(



Sidenote: That ad for that new Shakespeare movie is annoying. I call shenanigans.

Okay, people who've read Charlie and Will (hereafter to b...

Okay, people who've read Charlie and Will (hereafter to be referred to as either "Chills" or by its working title, "Play It Again, Charlie") I need your last minute complaints/thoughts now, because I've got to get this bitch out before I go insane with it and at this point when I look at it I either blank out or get way too obsessed with commas.

(Delete the comma. Replace the comma. Stare at sentence. Delete the comma. Realize it's not a crucial sentence after all and delete the whole sentence. Scroll down and realize that sentence was actually there to set up something later and was crucial. Oops. Undo "delete". Go back to staring at commas.)

It's getting me nowhere because I can't tell what needs editing anymore. Argh.

I'm gonna go back to reading about Barbados. For research purposes, honestly. It isn't like I can go there.
:(

ooh so pretty!

So they suggested a bunch of titles for the Alex/Everett thing (which I called "An Imperfect Christmas" because I so fail at titles) and their titles are amazing, but I'm kind of leaning toward "A Wealth of Words Unsaid". It's so *pretty*.

Whatever title I end up with (probably that one), the novella will be available in December!

More later.


Sidenote: 30 Rock how so awesome?