A. Adams's Blog, page 4

Something is Rotten in Denmark, and No, It’s Not Caroline Wozniacki … At Least Not Yet

“You can get run off a [ninja] not soft.”–Big Freedia

Though thoughts of 2009 and almost every “dicked around” time after and before that time played through my mind, I still told myself, foolishly so, that the U.S. Open would not b*tt f*** the comeback queen, SuperMama extraordinaire, the only real G.O.A.T in contemporary sports–f*ck ya’ll,  non-believers; she does it on her own–no team to relieve her or quarter to sit out when she’s tired–SERENA WILLIAMS this year.

Alas, I was wrong. Because unlike the Wimbledon loss in July, which was a fair and square loss at the hands of the Wednesday Addams-smile having Angelique Kerber, there is a stench in the air with Williams’s recent U.S. Open loss to the reclusive Naomi Osaka, a 20-year-old who plays for Japan but has lived the majority of her life in the States.

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According to Osaka lore, her father picked Japan as his daughter’s banner country because it “offered” her perks that the U.S./USTA could not and would not match.

Sounds about right.

I’ve watched tennis long enough–ahem, 20 years–to know the USTA is a little suspect and the decisions it makes are even more “suspectitous.”

Like, why in the hell was Carlos Ramos calling the Women’s Final if you know he has never umpired a women’s match, has a reputation of being a stick in the mud, and may be the type to get “in his feelings” when women “talk back” to him?

Look at him.

 

And look at Serena pointing that index finger.

Ooooooo-wee.

That black girl magic had Ramos shook. Not only did he take an entire game from our center court queen in the do or die 2nd set, but gave Osaka an automatic 0-15 and thus, three shots away from a U.S. Open title and a $3 mill plus check.

And what did Williams do to provoke Ramos’s “off with her head” (shout out to the French Open ; )–a Marie Antoinette and the banning of Serena’s catsuit reference)?

Nothing.

Ramos “caught”–he’s supposed to be watching what’s on the court rather than the crowd–Williams’s coach, Patrick Mouratoglou, coaching her, “coaching” that she was not paying attention to and couldn’t see, because she was, uh …

too busy being in position to return her opponent’s ball.

So, Williams got penalized for something her coach was doing when only HE (Mouratoglou) should have been warned or penalized for said action–and not her.

So, she argued her point that she’s not a cheater.

She’s not.

So, she argued that she doesn’t need coaching.

She doesn’t.

Win or lose, Serena only listens to Serena when she’s out there on the court.

But we know who is a cheater, who needs coaching, and who the U.S. Open welcomed with open arms by advancing her a wildcard when other tournaments snubbed their nose at her and placing her on Ashe/the main stage over higher ranked, more deserving players like a prized turkey at Thanksgiving.

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The U.S. Open even allowed the dazzling doper to have ALL her matches at primetime on Armstrong and Ashe until her 4th round loss this year.

Who knew that winning 5 grand slams while doping would yield better treatment than winning a record 23, with 24 coming soon, grand slams won by hard work, endurance, and sheer will.

After all she’s done in her career, let alone in the last year to make two grand slams finals post giving birth to her first child, an selfless act that almost killed her, Serena deserved to break that racket and more.

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F*ck Ramos and all those who “agree” with him.

Still, U.S. Open tournament officials, really, all the worldwide tennis officials, you should listen to Serena … if you value your bottom line.

She’s not a cheater.

She doesn’t need coaching.

SHE, and not the other players you schmooze, sells your tickets.

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You Can’t Stop Me From Loving Myself

YouTube has made a new enemy: ARMYs.

“Ohohohoh. Ohohohoooo.” –Hook from “Idol” by Bangtan Sonyeondan

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I’m not the kind of person who frequently leaves comments on various social media outlets when someone posts something new, interesting, trendy, etc.

I may Like or Retweet a comment, but that’s the extent of my “socialness.”

If I have any form of benevolence or malevolence about something, I write about it–hence this post.

So, let’s get [to] it–*in my Jung Kook voice.

YouTube has done a bad, bad thing. Several bad things, really, in the last nine months: striking or deleting people’s channels due to arbitrary rules about copyright infringement; deleting videos; and, *gasp, tampering with videos’ view counts.

“The computer did it” has become the new “the dog ate it.”

But as we know, the computer, at least for now anyway, is controlled by humans and they can twist algorithms any which why they want, and the ones that “win” based on the data are the ones the human controllers prefer or were paid to prefer.

That’s what happens when you make one brand the end-all, be-all in town.

If music videos were actually world premiered and consistently played on TV, like they should, then no one would need to rely on YouTube for his/her daily visual and audial fix and record companies’ bottom line.

I read a quote that said people don’t change, the mask just falls off.

Which is so true.

YouTube used to be a haven for DIYers–teaching a skill set or showcasing a skill set.

It was not intended to become the MTV, VH1, BET, and Fuse of the Internet.

But now that it is…

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You can complain all you want about how unfair the company’s practices are, and all its big-wigs are going to do is laugh from their throne, dusting imaginary crumbs (i.e., you) from their elegant silk robes, slurring, “Peasants. Peasants.”

Like Frankenstein, we created the monster and now we want to chase it through the streets with our flaming torches now that we’ve realized that it can’t be controlled or reasoned with.

The system is discriminatory.

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YouTube easily believes that Taylor Swift can garner 43 plus million views in 24 hours and 100 million plus views within four to five days, though she’s from the U.S., which only has a population of 330 million, and has a fandom that tips at maybe a million plus people–I’m being generous.

And, according to YouTube, when a video casts a large amount of views in a short time span, it freezes the views on the video, counts them, and gets rid of views that are not “quality” views–meaning, views from individuals who have streamed the video multiple times.

So, YouTube, you contend that the views you count from Taylor Swift and other popular Western artists like her are individual-based, that those are not views from people watching/streaming her videos multiple times, that she has hundreds of million people across the globe watching her videographies???

I’m from the U.S. and am an intense music lover, and I can’t tell you one Taylor Swift video that I have watched or tell you the lyrics of one of her songs from her “historic” 10-plus year career.

Let an Asian or other foreign artist that is considered a “minority” in the U.S. with a fan-base in the multimillions–due to the fact their fans come from countries with a half a billion to a billion plus people–pull views that far surpass that of a Western artist like Swift, etc., and this is what you will get from YouTube:

1. A 14-hour freeze on video views.

2. 30 plus million views deleted.

3. YouTube representatives telling unhappy subscribers aka customers to tell the music artist(s) to stop “encouraging” them to “spam” YouTube because “they” (the artist[s]) are not “happy” with the results…

Wait a minute. Let me take a second and become as unprofessional as these YouTube representatives.

Bitch (genderless), you really think a billion-dollar revenue making music group is going to take the time out of their uber-busy schedule to “push” their fans in to complaining to YouTube about views on a video when they sell out arenas in minutes, pre-sale albums in the millions, and are sponsored by major worldwide brands???

Like, for reals, YouTube?

Sh*t, let me sip on that…

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You know, the movie Crazy Rich Asians is #1 at the U.S. box office for the second week in a row. I guess, if I’m using Youtube’s logic, only other Asians, who make up barely six percent of the U.S. population, went to see it, and they only saw it once because the box office does not count revenue from individuals who saw the movie multiple times.

LMFAO!

YouTube, stop being discriminatory when it comes to views and your subscribers.

You can’t pick and choose who you want to support: Oh, those are a bunch of cute girls with sexy outfits, singing about nonsense, so they’re harmless; oh, he’s a living parody, a one-hit wonder type, let his cartoonish a** have his 15 minutes.

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Nevertheless, my friends, there is a solution to almost every problem.

Money = power.

Take away their money: the fees you pay for your subscriptions, stop your foot traffic across their web site, and delete your channel yourself or delete your videos.

Force YouTube to play fair or force record companies and yourselves to create another, more balanced forum to showcase their and your talent.

It’s fine to complain. But it’s best to be proactive.

Never let anyone make you think you don’t have a voice, and that you don’t matter.

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Remember, we are bulletproof.

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Dedicated to my famdom.

 

 

*Sigh

“I didn’t want to do it. I didn’t want to do-oooooo it.” *In my Martin Lawrence voice when he kept blocking that ball-hogging kid while holding a plate of pizza in the movie Rebound.

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Ah, MTV…

I love you. I really do. I grew up with you. You shaped me into the semi-(dys)functional adult I am today.

But–

What. The. F*ck. Are. You. Thinking?

Why would you have a “video” “music” awards show when you DON’T PLAY VIDEOS, with the exception of the wee hours of the morning when you know no one is watching?

Why would you broadcast your music show on a random August day and a MONDAY at that (the awards used to be shown in September and on a Sunday)?

Kids have gone back to school in most states and people work; who’s going to take the time to watch an awards show after spending a long day at either hellhole?

Why would you have a lineup of artists that mimic a 90s/00s throwback album featuring contemporary artists you think are popular?

Post Malone with Aerosmith???

Was this supposed to be the 2018 equivalent to Run-DMC and Aerosmith?

If so…

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Jennifer Lopez, video “vanguard” honoree?

Say what?

Even with videos caused a million plus dollars, J-Lo wasn’t spending that on her “masterpieces.”

ALL her videos were simplistic: her scantily or hip-hop clad, dancing to house music.

The “Dinero” video is proof of how much she has not strayed from this 1 + 1 = who the hell knows? formula in nearly 20 years.

Where were the segment after segment of Aretha Franklin homages???

As one of the few awards left in 2018 and premiering days after the Queen’s passing, you had a duty to show our national treasure/the 8th wonder of the world nothing but l-o-v-e and R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

Shame.

And while I know you all didn’t have a chance in hell in getting them to appear at the VMAs–this is album Comeback week, world tour starts this weekend, and they need about a year in advance notice–BTS should have been nominated for every category that was up for the taking.

“Havana” is a freshman film student’s first short film in comparison to “Fake Love,” “Mic Drop,” and “DNA.”

Hell, the whole K-Pop industry would murder any awards that contain the word “video” in their title.

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MTV, you showed your age Monday night–showed that you’re ran by a bunch of 60s, 70s, and possibly early 80s babies who need to have several pow-wows with their junior-high to college-age kids (or their relatives’ kids) to find out what’s really up in these streets, because, MTV, you are lost.

The analytics are lying to you and making you look like–

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It’s like ya’ll want to win, but you don’t want to win. Like if you actually put together quality programming, people would start to have expectations. And expectations would mean spending money–money the network doesn’t want to spend.

So, it will go down with the ship.

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Billboard and the American Music Awards are going to battle it out for ratings and bookings supremacy–until Netflix catches on and decides to create its own universal music and awards show(s).

…while MTV holds on like Jack did to that trunk in Titanic to its teen moms, fist-pumpers, and catfishers.

Excuse me if I don’t watch as it slips into the abyss.

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I read a quote that says I should always rush to promote what I love rather than rush to bash what I hate. Meaning, bish, spread positivity first and foremost whenever you have the chance rather than negativity.

But what if the thing you love is slowly becoming the thing you hate?

What then?

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MTV, what now?

Oooh…Try Me, B****

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Group Leader:  Okay. Who would like to share now?

Me: *Raises hand.

Group Leader: Okay. Introduce yourself.

Me: Hi, I’m ARMY. And I feel exploited.

*Resounding gasps.

If any of you watched the Teen Choice awards this past weekend, then you already know what’s about to go down.

Not only did our boys win Choice “International” Artist, but the squad won Choice Fandom.

Clap. Clap. Clap. Clap. Clap. Clap.

Congrats! Really, if anyone deserves consistent recognition for their hard work and the positive way in which they influence the social sphere, it’s Bangtan Sonyeondan and ARMY.

But no one ever asks ARMYs WHY Bangtan deserves their devotion and affection until we’re all putting our dentures in a glass and making a special request in our wills to have our shield engraved on our coffins.

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Damn right…that is the exact design I want, and if you attend my funeral and don’t see that sh*t, somebody better perform a motherf****** resurrection, so I can regulate.

Just saying.

Anyway…

All interviewers want to hear is a bunch of young girls–though ARMYs extend across several generations: ahjussi, ajumma, and sunbae along with noona, unnie, hyung, and oppa–scream and end it with “BTS.”

This “trend” has been ongoing: Billboard, The Ellen Show, and more…every question is prefaced with, “You have amazing fans. I’ve never heard such loud cheering in my life” (if you think the U.S. ARMYs are loud, go to Brazil and see how they get down).

Then: “WHO are the ARMY? WHAT are the ARMY?”

And, of course, Bangtan doesn’t make the situation any better by replying with super sweet sh*t like, “ARMY are our life. ARMY are our family.”

*Sob

Shut up. I’m NOT crying. You are.

And that’s why WE LOVE Bangtan: They have never treated their fans like fans–i.e., with fake love–they treat us like friends, like family, with love, care, and concern.

And they’re strangers.

Strangers who tell you that it’s okay to not know what you want to do in life; it’s okay to fail; that you can only live your life for yourself and no one else. That you will never be happy and love yourself if you follow the path others have set for you.

I don’t know how many times I’ve heard ARMYs say I was being bullied and “School of Tears” got me through it, or I’m about to start college and I’m really scared, but I listened to “N.O.” and “No More Dream” and I kind of know now how to handle the new obstacles that are about to come my way.

Or. I’ve never been confident in myself, but “21st Century Girl” makes me feel like the baddest b*tch on the planet.

Or. I work really, really hard and I make decent money, but I’m afraid to spend it, because “I never know…” but “GoGo” helped me realize that what’s the point of making money if I can’t enjoy it?

Or. I used to hate myself, but Bangtan taught me to love myself, something no parent, friend, lover, teacher, etc. ever did.

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What other artists are out there telling folks to turn off their cellphone and have an actual conversation at a table, eating a meal, with people you care about?

What other artists are out there telling you to ignore the videos, pictures, trivia, tweets, etc. associated with them and go study for your tests, write your essays, or go to bed early to be fresh and prepared for work?

No one.

No one, but BTS.

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Correction in graphic: RM not Rap Monster.

They’re UNICEF ambassadors for the fight to end violence, especially violence against children.

They were the only foreign artists asked to participate in the MLK 50th death anniversary “Keep the Dream” alive campaign. Even their song “Not Today” is inspired by MLK.

And the worst scandal they have ever been in: Leaking lyrics to new albums while drunk on vlive.

Sidenote: 17 more days until Kookie can legally drink in the U.S. and they will be in L.A. I can’t wait for the shenanigans that will follow as he spends the first month and a half of being 21 Stateside.

To say that BTS are role models wouldn’t adequately describe these young talented businessmen and artists from various provinces in South Korea.

They’re life models.

Encouraging people near and far to live their best life.

That’s how ARMYs should respond when people ask them about BTS.

For all the interviewers and venues who don’t know anything about BTS, and don’t care to know anything about them, who only want to feed off the buzz they create…

YouTube did not make BTS (if the videos came on television in our countries, they’d be watched there; *hint, hint MTV).

ARMY did not make BTS.

BTS made ARMY

…into better versions of ourselves, into people we never thought we could be.

…

Please visit and buy at LV Bangtan: https://lvbangtan.com

Proceeds from purchases at LV Bangtan go to BTS’s UNICEF #ENDVIOLENCE campaign.

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Remember: Love yourself.

Peace.

 

Not Perfect, But Beautiful…So I Love Me

“Oooh, b*tch you better. Oooh, b*tch you better. Oooh, b*tch you better f*ck a hater because he should know better.” –Big Freedia (ft. Lizzo) “Karaoke”

As I’ve said before, summer is the season that makes you reckless… and damn if I don’t feel like Fredo sitting in that lounge chair in The Godfather Part II telling Michael, “So what if Roth almost killed you, Kay, and your unborn child [spoiler alert: she did it later anyway–just saying] in your bedroom after Anthony’s First Communion! ‘I’M YOUR OLDER BROTHER! AND I GOT PASSED OVER!'”

Bold.

Ballsy.

Incredibly dumb, but understandable.

We all have that Fredo breaking point where we can’t keep biting our tongue; where we can’t keep stuffing down our truths until we’re bloated with them.

What is really so terrifying about saying the obvious?

I’m a f*cked up individual. I know it. I embrace it, and by golly, that makes me special.

And when I say “f*cked up,” I don’t mean the “I shoot squirrels and any other creature I find annoying with BB guns,” the self-harm, the transference of my insecurities by picking on others’ insecurities, etc. kind.

I mean the “my pores are too big, f*ck putting on sunscreen, or lotion for that matter, when I go out, I really shouldn’t eat this whole cake, but…, I dropped it on the floor but blew it off, so it’s still good, Googling how long I can keep leftovers in the fridge and eat them without dying,” etc. f*cked up.

Because my pores are definitely too large. I need a ray guy to shrink those bad boys.

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Sidenote: This is an actual ray gun on sale for $180.00. Nope, not buying.

My skin is an oxymoron–oily and dry.

My body looks great, especially in the bathroom mirror (*giggles heard in the distance; shut the f*ck up phone camera!).

Still, I want my upper arms to be as slender as they were in my early to mid-20s, so I’m “dieting”–*snickers –doing a 16:8 intermittent fast (which means I eat whatever I want between the hours of 2:00 p.m.-10:00 p.m. and sleep or “voluntarily” refrain from eating outside of those hours; that’s pretty much been my eating routine for years now and I don’t remember getting any slimmer due to it, but MAYBE things will work out differently this time… if I click my heels three times).

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Oh, and I thought long and hard–approximately two days–about cutting all my hair off and dyeing it silver.

I did end up changing my hair, and the style looks pretty decent–it was the different I was looking for but never knew I needed.

So, I guess the new challenge is to grow my hair as long as I can then chop it all off. Why? Because it’s the American way.

Ultimately, what I learned the most as the days of summer 2018 wind down is that it is okay to try new things–whether they pay off or not–and saying “I’m fabulous” is not a trait of narcissism. It’s an affirmation.

A reminder.

To always LOVE YOURSELF–ALL OF YOU.

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–Inspired by the Jintro of LY: Answer/Epiphany

PEACE.

 

Networking Without a NET

Someone: “If you want to get somewhere, it’s all about who you know, kid.”

Kid: “But I don’t know anyone.”

Someone: (*uncomfortably scratches his/her neck) “Bummer. Well, that’s life for you, kid.” *Walks away whistling.

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I would like to preface this post with a big middle finger to Facebook for making it so difficult for writers to consistently stay connected to its system to post their blog entries so their “Friends” can enjoy.

So, in honor of my lemon theme as we head towards the end of summer, FB, suck it.

Happy Mother’s Day!

No clever poem this year.

Just a genuine thank you to my mother for caring for me and shaping me into the fabulous person that I am.

I was fortunate to learn early on that no one can love me better than I can love myself.

Thus, I didn’t have to look for it in the bottom of a bottle, in pill, powder, crystal or “grass” form, in a life I could not afford to selfishly make, or in a familiar stranger.

I was luckier than most. I know that.

And that’s why I will always do what I can to make my mother proud.

I can never repay the life that I was given, so …

I’m forever in her debt.

Happy Mother’s Day to my mom! Love you!

Happy Mother’s Day to all moms!

50 Years Later You’re Still a N***** Openly and Secretly

“Oh, it’s just a word. It doesn’t mean anything. Words never killed anyone.”–The N-word enthusiasts.

Hmmm.

*Black male being pursued by the police. With his hands up, or even his arms trapped under the knees of an officer while lying on the asphalt, says, “Don’t shoot!”

Officer: *shot, shot, shot, shot, shot, shot, shot, shot, shot, shot, shot, shot, shot, shot, shot, shot, shot, shot, shot, shot….

Judge: “For the offense of selling drugs, I sentence you to life in prison without the possibility of parole.”

Doctor: “You have ______________[fill in the disease]. All we can do now is make you comfortable.”

*Native Americans on seeing the first white settlers. “They look friendly enough. Let’s help them.”

Emmett Till: “Hey, baby” (the lie of what was said varies, but the reality is he said nothing).

Lynch mob: “Let’s get that little n***er. Teach ’em how we do things in the great state of Mississippi.”

*Dr. Martin Luther King arriving in Memphis.

Confidantes of King: “Let’s move you to the Lorraine.”

Words indeed have power.

This man is an African American. African (Kenyan) father and American mother.

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This woman is black/a person of color–an American (every black person you see is not an African American; stop using that sh*t as a blanketed term for all dark people). The man to the right of her is an African king and a superhero (played by American actor Chadwick Boseman, who has somehow managed to play James Brown, Jackie Robinson, and Thurgood Marshall in several Hollywood films–though he resembles none of these men, and no one has ever said, “Damn, James, Jackie, and Thurgood are dopplegangers–can’t ever tell them motherf*ckers apart”)–a work of fiction.

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This is the state flag of Tennessee, the state in which MLK died 50 years ago today. A picture is worth a 1000 words.

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The Tennessee flag, like most state flags in the South, resemble the Confederate flag, which represents a “country” that was never officially established and lost in the civil war, so those holding on to this emblem of the “good ol days,” remember, you’re proudly celebrating the mediocrity of your ancestors. Look at this picture. I’m depressed for him.

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Okay, so in case you didn’t understand what I was doing here, let me break it down for you.

The Confederate “soldier” and those who live in states who have a variation of the Confederate flag as the flying banner for their states would call the people in the previous photos, in spite of them being the former president and first lady of the United States and the first black Marvel comic book hero, n***ers–even people who look exactly like them would call them that.

Let’s not forget Mr. Rainbow Push himself, Jesse Jackson, said he would cut then presidential candidate Barack Obama’s “nuts off” for talking down to black folks, trying to tell “n**ers how to act.” And that was 2008.

Whether 10 years, 50 years, or 2 months pass, black people in the United States are still n***ers.

You’ve been one since 1619. That is 399 years. Damn, when you’re going to start calling and seeing yourself and others like you as what you are–a human being.

I don’t have a dream. I have a reality.

There are no n****** in the promised land King spoke of.

Change.

National Walkout Day, White Day, Stephen Hawking Died Today, and It’s Humpday…

“Well, damn.”–Me.

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It’s been a month since a disturbed teenager with too many guns and too many unresolved emotions of anger, angst, abandonment, rage, and blame, as well as an unfortunate legal right to own such weapons with a brain that is still in the midst of developing, walked into his former high school and killed too many people in Parkland, Florida–a scenario that has played out across the United States too many times.

The “Valentine’s Day Massacre”–they called it.

Renowned 20th century mobster Al “Scarface” Capone would not be proud of the association.

When Capone committed his bloody atrocity in Chicago on February 14, 1929, the justification was clear: bad guys killing other bad guys to obtain ultimate power.

What “power” can a 19-year-old gain in 2018? What is the need for a 19-year-old to have weapons only appropriate for trained law officials and the military?

The second amendment my a$$. If you asked the Parkland shooter what the right to bear arms means, he would probably say, “Wearing short-sleeves or tank tops.”

This is the mindset of the youth nowadays: impetuous.

Yet you entrust them with high-powered assault rifles.

Across the country, on this Wednesday–the same Wednesday from one month ago (a little fact for you: if it’s not a leap year, all the days in February and March match each other until the 28th day)–students are walking out, even college kids, of the classroom to send their own message to those in power: “We’re mad as hell and we’re not going to take it anymore.”

One life lost is already one too many.

We already know the reason gun control has not been effectively “controlled” is due to money. The gun business–legally and illegally sold–is indeed a lucrative one.

Still, if someone comes along and randomly blows your a$$ off for no apparent reason, aside from you happened to be shopping at the grocery store at that time, you happened to be in class trying to learn, you happened to be in class trying to teach, you happened to be in the bank making a deposit, you just happened to be at a concert to see your favorite performer, you just happened to be in the airport going on or coming from a trip, you just happened to stop for quick bite to eat…, how, gun sellers, will you spend your wealth made from steel?

Damn, can we live?!

It will be quite difficult to if we don’t change not only gun laws, but the mindset that all the problems one has can be solved if he/she picks up a gun.

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Physicist Stephen Hawking died today at 76. The things this man was able to do with his mind even after his body physically shut down on him were simply amazing. Miraculous even. Where is this type of drive and determination in able-bodied individuals???

Why do we hurt others when we’re hurt? We can’t we say we’re hurt and find positive avenues to prevent others from suffering in the same manner?

A 12-year-old boy recently committed suicide due to bullying.

Again, why do we hurt others because we’re hurt?

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It’s White Day–the Valentine’s Day for women; a tradition from Asia, starting in Japan.

So, I am celebrating this love day with this post, because what a burden women actually have–they can unknowingly birth monsters into the world and have to live with the aftermath of their children’s bad decision-making as if they themselves committed the crime.

Even Hitler had a mother.

Change, real change, starts within.

If You’re Lonely…

“…then go on YouTube and watch BTS; they will sing for you, dance for you, make you bilingual, and make you laugh your a$$ off”–Me

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Hello, again, netizens on this day of “heart”warming and “heart” breaking. In the East, eastern part of the world and not the “east” side of your town, Valentine’s Day is for guys–you make their a** some nasty a** homemade chocolate and other sh** they’re going to throw in a closet to show your affection.

I don’t have that much affection, so I leisurely wait a month later–called White Day–to reap all the benefits of people actually having their tax refunds by then, life reblooming from this cold, dead-a** winter, and Spring Break kicking off–to celebrate being a “sweetheart.”

We have it backwards here in the West about Valentine’s Day–you’re actually going to cook, get prettified, and give your cookies away to a motherf***** who gives you supermarket flowers and candy that has been on store shelves since January, and who has been/is sh*tty the rest of the 364 days of the year.

Damn, what would you do for a Klondike bar?

Before anyone can properly love you, you have to love yourself, and I mean every f*cked up thing about you.

That’s how we love our family: in spite of because we can’t do without them.

Well, love yourself in spite of whatever is going wrong, because “you” can’t do without you.

It’s barely two months into 2018, and I’m sure many of you resolved to cut out the bullsh*t, but here you go falling for it because it’s February 14th.

The majority of us came in this world alone and that’s the way we’ll leave out. So, if you’re feeling lonely, know that the loneliest feeling ever is to be with someone but you may as well be by yourself–because that’s how “alone” he/she makes you.

I don’t know about you, but I am chilling today: just me and my heart, and we are bulletproof–richocheting all that sh*t.

Love yourself: her (him)–which also happens to be a BTS album title (do you see why I love BTS? Ah. They get it).

To all those in love with love (because love can be a drug), Happy Valiumtine’s Day.

Hehehehe.

ARMY out.