Diamond Mike Watson's Blog, page 15

A Lion or a Man Who Wants to be Loved?

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If one takes the time to look, it is easy to ascertain the heart and mind of a person by what they type. In the case of Donald Trump, did any of us take the time to read what he typed?

We saw a lion who was brazen and bold. We saw relentless confidence and steadfast beliefs. Surely each of us were attracted to at least one of his campaign promises.

I can understand Donald Trump as a human being. I also know few people who are as colorful and engaging. Yet, his obsessive need for acceptance and admiration is a problem for anyone who needs to contemplate important issues that are relevant to our nation. We are all narcissists to a degree, but when a personality disorder becomes so great it becomes disabling, then we must understand we are not qualified for every job.

If you haven’t already, I would suggest everyone to do a search for Donald Trump’s favorite form of typed of communication, which is Twitter. Ask yourself, what kind of a person says this? An inspirational leader? A schoolyard bully? Or the president of the United States who stands for the qualities of democracy we all cherish?

If we remain silent, we are giving consent to the fear, dissent, and distrust that he has unleashed throughout the world. We cannot not allow this childlike behavior to be normalized.

As Trump’s lovability continues to plummet, I feel empathy for a man whose ultimate goal in life is to be loved.

Filed under: Life Adventures

What is Humanity? Eating, Loving, and Laughing.

 

 

[image error]In 1993, shortly after I had decided to rebuild my life in California, six friends came to my apartment for refreshments. Carmen was from Guatemala, Daniel was from Switzerland, Sontaya was from Thailand, Hamid and Touraj were from Iran, Shlomi was from Israel. There was only one person that was from the United States- me.

Carmen and Daniel were Christian. Sontaya was Buddhist. Hamid and Touraj were Muslim. Shlomi was Jewish. I was the only one who did not profess a religion.

As we huddled together sipping wine and beer, we realized the different shades of our skin and contours of our faces. We planned a party the following Sunday, but this time with an intention: each person must bring a dish of food from their native country.

Touraj brought Persian rice.

Sontaya brought chicken with peanut sauce.

Carmen cooked black beans with fried platanos.

Shlomi brought fresh hummus.

I flipped hamburgers.

As we sat to eat while sharing stories on the patio, we realized we were strikingly the same. Although most of my friends spoke with strong accents, we understood and laughed at each other’s jokes.

That was twenty-four years ago, yet we still remember the joy of sharing our cultures from that humble dining experience. Carmen and I married shortly afterward. Daniel and Sontaya married later. I still occasionally see Shlomi and Touraj. I haven’t heard from Hamid, but Daniel said he is doing well.

Our family now celebrates the International Dinner every year in the summertime. It has become a tradition of thankfulness. It was not born from a single religious belief, but was based on the mutual respect that we are all born from the same planet we call Earth.

I almost cry as I type this, wondering what my life would be like if that gathering never took place in the summer of 1993. I also cry for the Muslim immigration and Syrian refugee ban our president has instituted. From the mere stroke of a pen, chaos, havoc, and fear has been unleashed throughout our world. It is difficult to imagine this impulsive decision was done for our security or safety, for a signal has already been sent that the United States no longer welcomes immigrants and has targeted a particular group of people from crossing our border. We are now less safe, and have offered a fuel to breed more terrorism.

What kind of country have we become?

Is this who we are?

What do we tell our kids?

I oppose walls, torture, fear, and exclusion. I oppose name-calling and finger pointing. If you want to change the world for the better, the highest wall will not transform anyone’s heart. Humans are remarkably alike. We all have the same hopes and dreams. We love to eat. We love to laugh. If you don’t believe me, ask my wife or my friends. If you still do not believe me, please join us at our next International Dinner. Not only will you relish the foods we prepare, but we will also laugh at each other’s humor.

We may even become lifetime friends.

Please share.

Filed under: Life Adventures, Philosophy, Society

Irony

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I would love to tell you a joke or try to make you laugh, but it has heen hard for me to laugh since Friday. There’s always time for a joke, but not tonight.

Trump’s order from Friday states that, “in order to protect Americans, the United States must ensure that those admitted to this country” don’t bear “hostile attitudes” to our nation’s “founding principles.”

The order also says,

“The United States should not admit those who engage in acts of bigotry or hatred (including…other forms of violence against women, or the persecution of those who practice religions different from their own) or those who would oppress Americans of any race, gender, or sexual orientation.”

Although Trump now insists this is not a Muslim ban, I remember as my family watched him proclaim a “total and complete shutdown” of Muslims entering the United States. How can this be viewed as anything other than “persecution of a religion different than their own?”

The poetic irony is that his order would preclude Trump himself from stepping foot on our soil. He is the very definition of a “hostile attitude” toward America’s “founding principles” of religious freedom.

The disgrace is that Trump, who has spread so much hate, fear, bigotry and sexism, is the one attempting to define our “American values” for the purposes of determining who may live here.

Using the same words from his own order, would Trump himself pass the vetting of these questions?

Hostile attitude?
Acts of bigotry or hatred?
Violence against women?
Persecution of those who practice religions different from their own?
Oppress Americans of any race, gender, or sexual orientation?

 

Filed under: Life Adventures, Philosophy, Society

Blinded by our Light

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At an early age, my adoptive mother taught me to be compassionate, kind, and to respect every human being. She instructed me to be slow to anger, to laugh at myself, and to look at myself first before finding fault in others. She told me to enjoy life without fear and to always stand up for what is right.

This childhood instruction has shaped me into the person I am today. This is my essence. This is me.

My mother is gone now, but she planted and ember of love that has ignited into a flaming torch. To this day, I see a wonderful world even on the stormiest of days.

During the last several months, we have seen how the leader of our country, whether intentional or not, has unleashed an epidemic of causeless fear, anger and injustice toward selected groups of people and throughout the world.

How do you feel about this? I realize we all had different upbringings, but are these actions complimentary with the way you see a world you are proud to call home?

We should not sit back and “see what happens.” We should not “pray for our leaders” without also taking peaceful action. We should not be silenced in the boggy swamp of mediocrity.

Be prepared to be blinded by our light.

I love my country and I love you.

Filed under: Childhood Memories, Life Adventures, Philosophy

The Narcissist

“Trump has been resentful, even furious, at what he views as the media’s failure to reflect the magnitude of his achievements, and he feels demoralized that the public’s perception of his presidency so far does not necessarily align with his own sense of accomplishment.” The Washington Post. Jan 24, 2017.

Note: President Trump is not bad, evil, or mentally ill . His intention is not to be fascist, racist, misogynistic, or to mock those who are disabled. He does have a personality disorder called pathological narcissism. Therefore, he will always attack or put down any group or person who does not agree with him or look upon him favorably. Narcissists do this as an effort to elevate their own self worth.

Filed under: Life Adventures

Dear Friends,

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Dear friends, I apologize if my sense of humor has been partially replaced with current political issues I believe are destructive. If I say, “the election is over”, “let it go”, or “give the president a chance”, it proclaims that I am not willing to stand up for those I feel have been harmed by the rhetoric of president Donald Trump.

I do not mean to demean or bash the incoming president, and I speak with compassion about a leader who has a personality disorder, called pathological narcissism, that I feel should disqualify him from this position.

Although I love humor including laughing at myself I don’t want to mislead anyone that I am unconcerned with issues that harm or violate the rights of others.

I am well aware that I may be at odds with many friends, however, I will continue to use social media as a platform to be heard and to transform our hearts.

Thank you.

Diamond Mike Watson

Filed under: Life Adventures

I am Sorry

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I am usually mild-natured and rarely get angry. But that is how I feel during this quiet beautiful morning after my town was just deluged with crystal balls of hail. They sparkled like diamonds as they crashed onto the bricks of our garden. There is silence now, and the sun has cut through the clouds. Everything is so green.

Why am I so angry?

The writing was on the wall. The evidence before my face. Donald Trump’s memoir rested on a dusty shelf in my garage. I usually keep most books that I buy, and I toted this one all the way from Kansas City where I managed a jewelry store. I bought it in 1987, when I was hungry to excel in sales and business.

I fantasized that I would one day be as successful as the man on the cover, kneeling handsomely with a long black coat under his name that was gold-embossed in capital letters.

The pages never spoke to me directly, and I felt a sort of uneasiness with advice that went against my conscience.

“I aim very high, and then I keep pushing and pushing and pushing until I get what I want.” Pg. 45.

I remind myself that anger is a wasted emotion.

As a young diamond merchant I was already honing my craft, and learned that a successful salesperson never “pushes,” but gently leads the customer to the correct solution. This might sound like a play on words, but the former suggests that one should sell at all costs, without concern for the customer. The second idea puts the receiver first.

“Sometimes I settle for less than I sought, but in most cases I still get what I want.” Pg. 45.

Again, it was clear the author seemed concerned only with benefitting himself. Trump’s book was one dimensional and hollow. In 1987, I was convinced American success came from practice and the genuine desire to benefit another, not in throwing a tantrum like a child. I also learned that doing business from one’s heart is much more fulfilling than selling to someone who does not need or want one’s offering. I now am certain this philosophy would hold true in any industry, whether in selling pizza, skyscrapers, or trade deals with China.

One can tell much from a person if you read their writings. You can understand the character, essence, and mind of a person if you listen carefully with your heart. What I didn’t realize was this person would be running for the President of the United States twenty-eight years later.

We need a President that is genuinely concerned about us.

My anger has diminished. I’m back to normal. But now I am sad.

I’m sad because I did not tell you about this earlier. I did not dream he would be elected. I was sure people would understand his true character. I am sorry.

Quotes from, “The Art of the Deal.” Donald Trump. 1987. Warner Books.

Filed under: Life Adventures, Philosophy

Questions for a President

 

Since I was a teenager, I remember my employers giving me a 30-day probationary period. Nowadays, it is called an “adjustment period.” This is necessary to benefit both the employer and the employee. It is an established time period to determine if an employee is right for the job and if the job is right for the employee. Both parties hope for the best, but sometimes it is later determined that a worker and a boss may not be the ideal fit for each other.

I wonder how this applies to the President of the United States. Should presidents have a trial period? Was there ever a president who declared, “This job may not be the best fit for me?”

A phrase I have heard many times in the past months is, “Let’s give Trump a chance.” We saw one side of him on the campaign trail, thinking he was simply playing the part he needed to win. We saw the same person when he became president elect, wondering why he still appeared to be campaigning with the same fierceness, disagreeableness, and divisive rhetoric.

Trump has been president for three days now and has still showed minimal effort in uniting our country with the hope and encouragement that we desperately need to hear. Because of a personality disorder called narcissism, Trump will continue to concentrate on his own personal accomplishments while insulting virtually every group of people that does not admire or agree with him. We cannot expect Trump to change. We must love him for who he is. I write this not with contempt or anger, but with compassion. We are who we are.

Question 1: Should a potential president be examined by the Surgeon General or the Army’s medical staff to determine their overall fitness, character, and mental conditions, such as personality disorders?

Question 2: Should there be an “adjustment period” for a president? If so, what should be the period of time?[image error]

Filed under: Life Adventures, Philosophy

Who is Donald Trump?

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Narcissus (1590s) by Caravaggio (Galleria Nazionale d’Arte Antica, Rome.)

A leader has been elected for our country. On January 20, we will have a 45th president. Why are most of us quiet or solemn? Is it because we feel we might have made a mistake that we do not want to admit? But we didn’t do anything wrong! It usually boils down to two candidates. We had to make a choice! We voted!

I feel I have “known” Donald Trump since 1987, at a time I continued my quest to learn all I could about sales success. I purchased his book, “The Art of the Deal,” only to realize that only 19 out of the 372 pages promised any glimmer to help others reach any pinnacle of success. The slight tones of arrogance did not strike a positive chord, and I chose to stick with former mentors (like Tom Hopkins and Brian Tracy) who shared my core beliefs of success. I previously learned success could only be acquired between two parties who benefitted each other equally. If a salesperson sold something for $10,000, for example, the salesperson should be content only when he knows he has given at least $10,000 in value and his customer feels he has received no less than $10,000 in value.

Page after page, The book bragged about the author’s never-failing endeavors, however it offered no advice how others coud succeed.

Whether one is selling shoes, skyscrapers, or trade deals that could impact nations, I believe it should be done with conviction, enthusiasm, but most importantly with the real purpose of benefitting the receiver. When the receiver benefits, we all can benefit. That was the definition of the wheels of commerce and the type of American success I was looking for.

On page 58 of his book, Trump says, “The final key to the way I promote is bravado. I play to people’s fantasies. People may not always think big themselves, but they can still get very excited by those who do. That’s why a little hyperbole never hurts. People want to believe that something is the biggest and the greatest and the most spectacular.”

And later,

“I call it truthful hyperbole. It’s an innocent form of exaggeration – and a very effective form of promotion.” Did I miss something, or did he just say that you should lie? The Art of the Deal. Warner Books. 1987.

Twenty-eight years after this was written, Trump ran for the president of the United States. As he began to accrue followers, a man named Tony Schwartz felt the need to come forward in an interview with the New Yorker. You see, Donald Trump didn’t write, “The Art of the Deal.” It was Tony Schwartz. Schwartz was paid by Trump to ghostwrite his memoirs. There is nothing wrong with that, by the way. Many people ghostwrite books. Frustrated with Trump’s short attention span during his interviews, he agreed to spend weekends with Trump, interviewing him at his office, while taking notes for the book. Schwartz’s concern was that he twisted his words to show Trump as a successful businessman. Working closely beside Trump for weeks, he noticed a man who seemed motivated not with the intention of benefiting others, but to acquire more power and media attention.

“I put lipstick on a pig,” Schwartz said.

“The first sentence of the book does have the vocal style of Trump, and says, ” I don’t do it for the money. I’ve got enough, much more than I’ll ever need. I do it to do it. Deals are my art form. Other people paint beautifully on canvas or write wonderful poetry. I like making deals, preferably big deals. That’s how I get my kicks.” Pg 1.

Schwartz says if he had written a biography of Donald Trump, the book, would have a shockingly different title, “The Psychopath”. http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2016/07/25/donald-trumps-ghostwriter-tells-all.

I saw something strangely different in Trump as a presidential candidate that would often show from my television screen. I watched different news sources, videos, and spent hours reading current news. Was he an extremely confident and successful businessman? Was he a bully? Why was he always so disagreeable? Did he ever laugh heartily? What was it that felt odd?

At my company, I hire teams of employees that must first pass a test. As part of this test, I ask why I should hire them. It is not their precise answers that will consider employment, but more importantly, how do they answer me.

Are they friendly and warm?

Do they show trust by being good listeners without interrupting?

Would they be willing to accept constructive criticism?

How would I feel if I were a customer and met this job candidate for the first time?

If I met Donald Trump for the first time, would I want to hire him?

It was these thoughts that led me to write this article.

Many words were thrown at us in 2016, including mysogyny, racism, and fascism. We even learned a new word that became Dictionary.com’s word of the year, xenophobia. : the intense or irrational dislike or fear of people from other countries.

We learned another word, narcissism.

According to Psychology Today, “Narcissistic Personality Disorder involves grandiosity, a lack of empathy for other people, and a need for admiration. People with this condition are frequently described as arrogant, self-centered, manipulative, and demanding. They may also concentrate on grandiose fantasies and may be convinced that they deserve special treatment.

“People with narcissistic personality disorder believe they are superior or special, and often try to associate with other people they believe are unique or gifted in some way. This association enhances their self-esteem, which is typically quite fragile underneath the surface. (Narcissists) seek excessive admiration and attention in order to know that others think highly of them. Individuals with narcissistic personality disorder have difficulty tolerating criticism or defeat, and may be left feeling humiliated or empty when they experience an “injury” in the form of criticism.” Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/conditions/narcissistic-personality-disorder#sidr-main. 12/14/2016.

The term, “narcissism” originated from Greek mythology, in which a beautiful boy named Narcissus fell in love with his own image reflected in a pool of water. In the ancient legend, Narcissus falls in love with the reflection of himself in a pool and plunges into the water and drowns.

In the world of psychology, it is impossible to talk about Donald Trump without using the word narcissism. George Simon, a clinical psychologist who conducts seminars on manipulative behavior, says Trump is “so classic that I’m archiving video clips of him to use in workshops because there’s no better example of (narcissism.) Otherwise I would have had to hire actors and write vignettes. He’s like a dream come true.” Vanity Fair. http://www.vanityfair.com/news/2015/11/donald-trump-narcissism-therapists.

The article further states,

“Mr. Trump’s bullying nature—taunting Senator John McCain for being captured in Vietnam, or [saying Jeb Bush has “low energy”](http://www.vanityfair.com/news/2015/09/trump-bush-gop-debate)—is in keeping with the narcissistic profile.

In speaking of Trump, clinical psychologist Ben Michaelis says, “Textbook narcissistic personality disorder. In the field we use clusters of personality disorders. Narcissism is in cluster B, which means it has similarities with histrionic personality disorder, borderline personality disorder, and antisocial personality disorder. There are similarities between them.

Regardless of how you feel about John McCain, the man served—and suffered.

Narcissism is an extreme defense against one’s own feelings of worthlessness. To degrade people is really part of a cluster-B personality disorder: it’s antisocial and shows a lack of remorse for other people. The way to make it O.K. to attack someone verbally, psychologically, or physically is to lower them. That’s what (Trump) is doing.”

Vanity Fair. http://www.vanityfair.com/news/2015/11/donald-trump-narcissism-therapists.

I took the standard test online to see if I was narcissistic. Surprisingly, my high score claimed I was.

Psychcentral.com http://psychcentral.com/cgi-bin/narcissisticquiz.cgi. I also scored highly on a self-confidence tests. At once I needed to know the difference between the two.

The difference between self–confidence and narcissistic behavior.

“Confidence is being at peace with yourself, while narcissism represents a relentless inner struggle. People who are confident don’t feel the need to be competing at everything life has to offer. They’ve already achieved victory by being who they are, and they don’t need other people below them in order to feel good about themselves.

Confident people are ok with saying ‘I don’t know. Let me find out for you.” They know they have something important to add, but they don’t let that interfere with what someone else has to say.”

“For narcissists, each day is a struggle. You can tell a narcissist when you find one because they’ll always have an answer for everything. They constantly interrupt others to make sure they’re heard, and they’re always ready to take credit for something, whether they deserve it or not. Narcissists get high off of other peoples’ mistakes, as it gives them a short-term self-esteem boost.

“Confident people are fulfilled when they brighten someone else’s day, while narcissists are fulfilled by brightening their own day.

“Narcissists feel best about themselves when they are able to make people feel below them.

“Typical narcissistic behavior is when someone is constantly trying to lower the value of everyone around them, as opposed to raise their own.

Instead of making the world a better place, they’re just trying to make everything around them worse, so they can enjoy the view from above. This is a pitiful way to live, and provides nothing but the most hollow, temporary boost of self-esteem.”

http://everydaypowerblog.com/2015/10/20/difference-self-confidence-narcissistic-behavior/.

The Tweets

I appears that Trump had decided to use Twitter as a megaphone throughout his presidency. The public will quickly tire of his jabs at others, and his bursts of grandiosity. His words will have less and less authority.

The president of the United States has traditionally been a person who exerts a moral force in our country. His position has become a symbol for our country and our world. We look to that person for courage and inspiration. We encourage our kids to reach for the stars, telling them it is possible they could be President of the United States. But do we want them to learn their narrative from Donald Trump?

I am the best and the greatest! (From various Trump tweets)

Our Southern border is unsecure. I am the only one that can fix it.

There’s nobody bigger or better at the military than I am.

The only one to fix the infrastructure of our country is me – roads, airports, bridges. I know how to build.

Remember, I am the only presidential candidate who will bring jobs back to the U.S.and protect car industry!

No-one has done more for people with disabilities than me.

I will bring our jobs back to the U.S., and keep our companies from leaving. Nobody else can do it.

I am the BEST builder, just look at what I’ve built. Hillary can’t build.

I will be the greatest job-producing president in American history.

My I.Q. is one of the highest -and you all know it!

I am attracting the biggest crowds, by far, and the best poll numbers.

I will end with a question. Is Donald Trump mentally healthy enough to be the President of the United States?

Final note. “Pathological narcissism is not, strictly speaking, a mental illness. Rather, it is classified as a personality disorder, afflicting someone whose behavior and beliefs lie far outside the norm. “. https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-fix/wp/2016/07/22/is-donald-trump-a-textbook-narcissist/?utm_term=.c7acb2d2e981.

Filed under: Life Adventures, Philosophy

And I will build a Great Wall of Disaster

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Here is a photo of the Rio Grande that flows around sections of the Mexican border. The president elect suggested a beautiful, tall wall. Imagine a wall in this photo. Does this look beautiful to you now?

What about the endangered North American jaguars? Also, black bears would become threatened if not able to mate with Mexican bears. And the roads and infrastructure to build this wall! What a disaster to the landscape and ecology!

And the cost. ($8-10 billion is out of the question. Other estimates show $25 billion.)

We can talk forever about the negative results of such an out-of-thin-air whim that the president elect proposed last year. Although the idea may have been well intended, it is obvious he has never given any thought of its ramifications.

I think most of us are in agreement that our country has become a wonderful place from giving the opportunity from people of all nations to share and demonstrate their special skills. There is no country that matches our combined talent. There are many solutions to help curtail those who cross our borders illegally. But first, before we move on to other issues, can we calmly realize that a 1,900-mile wall is not the solution? In fact, it would be a multi-billion dollar total disaster.

Following is #14 of Trumps wildest quotes as per CBS News:

“I will build a great wall — and nobody builds walls better than me, believe me –and I’ll build them very inexpensively. I will build a great, great wall on our southern border, and I will make Mexico pay for that wall. Mark my words.”

http://www.cbsnews.com/pictures/wild-donald-trump-quotes/14/

Filed under: Life Adventures