Stuart Bone's Blog, page 3

Creativity and Tax Returns

It's been a good writing week for me. Having amended a lot of the early part of new novel, CRIME & NOURISHMENT I've now moved it far enough along to feel I'm back on track. For a time writing it felt like a chore but I'm glad I persevered as it's now something I look forward to returning to each day.

The other bit of good news (well a lot of people wouldn't consider it good) was that I finally got my online tax account set up so I can fill in my tax return. I've been trying to sort it since the beginning of May! Turns out I already had a login from the last time I had to fill one in back in 2004! That was in the days of printed returns so I didn't expect to have an online login from then. I only found that out when I finally managed to speak to an actual human being at the tax office rather than that god-awful recorded voice. (She and I fell out on several occasions and once she actually hung up on me...honestly, a recorded voice put the phone done on me!)

I know I've got until next January to fill the return in but I'm a very organised person and like to get it done as soon as possible.

Although everything is online and supposedly simpler I still had to request my login Id by post and then, because the e mail address they had for me was out of date, I had to order a password by post too.

Added to that, once I started filling in the return I discovered I didn't have a copy of my bank account interest statement. I thought I'd be able to view one online but no; it was another phone call and a copy will be winging its way to me via the postal service in the next week.

So it's away with the finance and back with the creativity. Well for some, creativity and tax returns go hand in hand.

Maggie Reynolds is no longer sure the police have the right culprit in prison for the murder of Samantha Jacobson. At the moment all of her so-called evidence is just rumour and hearsay. But if the real killer is still on the loose and about to strike again...

The Best Laid Plans of Mice and Men

I felt I didn't get much done on latest novel, CRIME & NOURISHMENT last week. Therefore I planned a bigger effort this week; head down to write and write and get back on track after the recent amendments I made.

Yesterday I received a text from the opticians to say my new lenses were in and I needed to bring my glasses in to put them in. It should only take an hour. Got to the opticians this morning.

"Oh, they're frameless glasses. That will be two hours."

Ok, I'll mill about for two hours instead. Hmm, that pain from the tooth with the crown that I had last month is back again. Perhaps I should pop into the dentist as I pass it on the way home.

"We can get you an appointment for five o'clock."

That's good, although it's a half hour drive each way. By the time I got home, had dinner; sorted a few things and cleaned my teeth...

Oh, it's time to drive back.

Today's word count - Zero.

After spending over £100 on the lenses and then booking in for a £500 root canal next month this unscheduled day off has become very expensive.
("Did you get away this year?" "Oh yes, I holidayed up the Root Canal.")

Of course the worst thing was the dentist telling me that if the root canal didn't work I'd probably lose the tooth and have to have a fake one!
Great, stronger glasses and false teeth. I'm going to start predicting the weather with my leg cramps and other twinges.

Anyway, tomorrow it's back to the novel...or is it!

(Extra note. Before I saved this, the internet crashed and I've just had to type this up for a second time! It's not my day today)

A Break from the Routine

Today's my first day back working on the latest novel after a week off. I didn't go away on holiday but I managed some time to myself and also time spent with friends I haven't seen in a while which was lovely.

I hadn't realised quite how much I needed some time off. Doing something I love doing as a job is great and it's easy to take a few hours off here and there when I need to do other things but it's been a long time since I took a complete break from it. It is work, at the end of the day (even though when people ask me about returning to an employed job they ask, "Are you working yet?) and we all need a break from the daily routine.

Just before I took the time off I made a few changes to CRIME & NOURISHMENT after reaching the halfway stage on the first draft. A couple of things weren't working but unfortunately the changes meant I was pretty much going to rewrite the whole thing again. I rewrote three chapters before I took the week off so now I'm raring to go to continue on with that.

I do find I like to test myself with each new novel. With NOTHING VENTURED I had to intertwine four stories to ensure they flowed well together. I think this latest one is an extension of that; coming up with a complicated plot to ensure no one can guess who the killer is until the end; while also trying to make the story easy to follow.

A crime novel needs a large cast of characters, whether they be suspects or just someone that helps the protagonist with the case and they need to be remembered by the reader. There's nothing worse than coming across a name and thinking, "Who was that again?"

One of the problems I found with my first draft was that I was halfway through before some of the suspects had even been mentioned, which I think was a mistake. I realised that I needed them there at the beginning with possible motives and perhaps, something else to hide. That's one of the main reasons why the whole thing needed adjusting.

While I've resurrected one character and brought in another murder from a previous idea, I've also changed Maggie, the protagonist. She's now running her own detective agency from an office above the café that she part owns but doesn't run. It makes more sense for her to be able to work on a case full time and this way, I can still keep the title.

So, it's nose to the grindstone time again. I'm also working on another writing project which I hope will generate some income but more on that as and when (or if) it takes off.

Right, chapter four...

There's no reason Humorous Fiction should be overlooked

When I receive money for a birthday I will invariably spend some of it on books. This year was no exception. With the money now gone I'm left with eight books that I'm looking forward to reading. They're a mix of crime fiction, literary fiction, women's fiction, biography and other non-fiction.

I've always read widely and that's usually the first piece of advice an author will give to someone - to write you have to read.

I think it's good advice for everyone. We should all read widely and perhaps try something we wouldn't usually pick. Sometimes we'll end up with something we don't like and just put it aside, or we'll skim through it as we don't like it but we really want to know what happens at the end; but other times we'll be surprised by how much we're enjoying a new book and will want to read more.

Which brings me onto my genre; humour. Personally I don't like genre headings. It's the same when someone asks what type of music you like and they start talking about grunge and garage and I have no idea what sort of music that is. I like what I like; there isn't a particular type. For me literature is the same. Okay, so the headings are more recognisable but as a humorous writer, my writing can, and does, take me into all of those other genres.

I've mentioned before that agents seem afraid to take humour on because it's too subjective but really they should take a chance. A humorous story isn't all jokes. First and foremost it has to have a great storyline and believable characters, just like every other novel out there. The only difference is that there's more humour in the story than most of the others. That's it. Yes, because humour is subjective some people may laugh at some bits while others don't, but the storyline itself doesn't suffer for the lack of a few laughs.

I would describe myself as writing comedy drama. There's fun and laughter in my novels but also sadness and heartbreak. I like to think that they replicate real life.

DRIVEN TO DISTRACTION is about finding yourself having to start over again. The protagonist, Derek is forty five, his wife has divorced him and kept the family home. Not long after, he's made redundant. In the space of a few months he's lost his wife, home, job and confidence. That's where the story opens with him trying to get away from it all on a holiday. Yes, there are lots of funny situations he finds himself in with a cast of eccentric and amusing characters but it's through them that he realises his situation isn't so unique. Each one of those characters has found themselves either starting over or about to start over again in their lives which helps give Derek strength and makes him feel positive about the future

NOTHING VENTURED is about taking a chance in life. While Dr Bryant's infatuation with his locum and Grace & Robert's attempts at spicing up their sex life are humorous asides to the main story; their reasons for their actions are very real and not actually humorous. For me, the main story between Diana and Lou, while a story about two women stuck in a rut for different reasons, can also be seen as a message that we shouldn't look to other people's lives to measure our own by.

Diana is nothing like her journalist sister, who travelled the world to report from war-torn countries but she can't help comparing their lives after her sister dies. It's Lou who points out that Diana can still make changes to her own life that don't have to be huge adrenalin rushes. For example, in Diana's world, learning to drive is a huge thing and she shouldn't worry that someone else may thing it a bit pathetic that she's never done it before. We're all different people with different personalities and different ideas.

I don't think social media helps when it comes to comparisons. Where it used to be just the magazines that would airbrush celebs on their pages to create an unrealistic image, everyone can do that now with app filters applied to photos before sharing them. I really don't understand the need to do that. It's the same with the competitive friends on Facebook. Someone puts a comment that they're holidaying in a certain country or they're eating a meal in an expensive restaurant and invariably a comment will come from a friend that says, "Yes I loved that city" or "You must try the crab cakes" just to show that they've been there and been there first.

But I digress. The point I'm trying to make is that a humorous story isn't so different from a crime novel, a thriller, or a piece of literary fiction. It should be a great story that the reader can enjoy and identify with and therefore can be just as popular as other genres. So, if you're reading this and haven't considered a humorous novel before; give it a go; read a John O'Farrell or a Tom Sharpe you won't be disappointed. Oh, or you could start with one of mine!

It's Exciting When The Writer Doesn't Know What's Happening Next

I was writing a scene for CRIME & NOURISHMENT this week that saw the introduction of a new character. He was needed as he had to shed some light on the personality of the first murder victim where there were no witnesses to the crime. I wasn't actually sure how the scene was going to develop so I just kept writing it to find out.

Sometimes that's the best position to be in and it proved so this time too. When the scene was over I'd managed to introduce some blackmail and implicated another character as a possible murder suspect. The news of this has also caused friction between two main characters and they can no longer continue investigating the crime together.

This certainly wasn't in my initial plans for the novel but I love that a story can shift and move about. Just by creating this new scene I now have a friendship in jeopardy and it will be interesting to see if it can be saved.

I suppose for some people the thought of sitting in front of a computer screen all day, in a room on your own; just typing away, writing descriptive scenes and conversations would be a nightmare but I absolutely love it.

I'm already looking forward to the rewrites of the second draft. At the moment I know the story has become a little random in places but the point of the first draft is to get everything into the story and then start cutting and amending later on and streamlining the text down into a solid, easy to follow novel.

I'm hoping I'll have this first draft finished by the middle of August and then I'll take a break and start the rewrites at the beginning of September. My Twitter profile mentions a publication date of early 2018 and I'm going to do my best to stick to that.

At least I know who the murderer is at this stage of the story. I just hope the reader won't have guessed!

A Continual Learning Process

I read some useful information this week about using HTML codes in my online book descriptions. I'm no genius when it comes to the latest technology. (A phone is something to make and answer calls on and a Tablet is something you pop in your mouth when you're not well) but I've used computers for many years.

The coding is actually pretty simple. It's just a case of putting the right letter between the 'less than' and 'greater than' symbols. For example, placing 'i' between '<>' at the start of the text and '/i' at the end of it will turn it into italics on Amazon. Using 'b' will make it bold etc.

It's a small and quite simple thing to do but it makes a big difference. Personally I think my book descriptions look a lot more professional on Amazon now that I've added in bold headings and quotes in italics.

My first novel's been on Amazon for fifteen months and only now do I realise I can adjust the text.

This is where information can help a writer. I must admit I've got pretty fed up recently of reading articles with titles that say, 'Ten ways to improve sales' and realising I've already tried all of the items on it but there are still bit and pieces out there that prove to be useful and writing & marketing is a continual learning process.

When it comes to marketing my third novel, CRIME & NOURISHMENT I'll be trying something that's new for me and will start advertising it before it's available for sale. I might even splash out on having a professional design the cover for me and perhaps get them to redesign covers for the first two as well so that all three link together (hopefully that would be a special deal!)

Anyway that's a bit of a way off yet although the first draft is coming along nicely. Maggie Reynolds is deeply involved in the investigation of the murder of Samantha Jacobs, but is the killer responsible for another two murders; or possibly even three? And just maybe there's about to be one more...

Oh God it's Blog Day!

I know, the heading doesn't bode well for the content of this blog. Sometimes the weeks pass by so quickly and it's a shock to realise it's been seven days since the last entry.

I start asking myself questions as I ponder the previous week: -

So what's new?
Well there are lots of things.

Okay, so what's been of interest?
Hmm, interesting does narrow it down. There's the dentist appointment tomorrow with the possible dead nerve in the tooth. How about that?

Surely you want to save that exciting nugget for next week?
Sarcasm?
Of course it is!

I'm really enjoying writing the first draft of novel number 3; CRIME & NOURISHMENT. There's nothing better than coming up with a new idea that will create more intrigue or move the story along a different path.

I'm pleased that it's now become a humorous crime novel, rather than a crime novel with humour. It's helped me get to know the characters better and the book will sit nicely with the first two.

The strangest thing I've found with this novel is that I'm not consulting my notes as I write it. With the first two I kept going back to the notes to ensure I'd put in everything I wanted but this one (which undoubtedly has a more complicated plot line with a murderer to find) my brain seems to have retained the information. It's amazing really as yesterday I went to put dirty plates into the washing machine rather than the dishwasher!

Perhaps it's because I spent more time at the planning stage and researching different aspects of the story. I'll keep that in mind when I start writing number 4. I like that I still learn so much from each new book.

Actually, mentioning number 4 (sorry I can't be blasé about this - Number 4?! I'm talking about a fourth novel?!! Wow! - Okay, I'm back in the room) it's quite possible that I'll go straight on to another crime one featuring the characters in CRIME & NOURISHMENT. I've mentioned a crime series before but that was for a previous idea that I shelved. When I began writing this I was looking at it as a one off. Now that I'm further in I've found myself thinking how certain characters could develop in the future. I was going to have a rather scary detective sergeant in this novel; Helen Cheung; a woman her inspector describes as being turned down by the Marines for being too aggressive. I've decided she'd be better appearing in the next one instead, where I can develop a very frosty relationship between her and my protagonist, Maggie.

For me, thinking about a sequel already means I know I'm on the right track with the current novel. A lot has happened already and there's still so much left to play out. It's all here in my head. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to put a Ready Meal in the tumble dryer.

Constant Development? I'm quite happy where I am thank you

I've been looking for a job recently. I'm not looking to return to my previous career, I just want a job to help eke out the savings while my novels continue to get noticed. Part time would be perfect.

I'm quite open to roles, whether it's in an office/bank where I can utilise my twenty years past experience or in retail, where I've also had some experience. I've yet to find something although I have applied for quite a few.

Why haven't I got one yet? There are three possible reasons: -

1. I've had a four year break from my banking career and even though I do actually remember what I did and haven't lost any of the skills and have, in fact, used them quite a lot in my writing career; perhaps firms see the break as a negative.

2. The break isn't a problem but then I'm overqualified for the level of role I'm applying for.

3. (My favoured answer) The problem is that I want a job.

Yes, you heard me right. I want a job. I don't want a career; I just want a job. That's the problem in a nutshell. These days (& I realise I'm basing this just on the banking industry) everyone must have a career development plan. It's not enough to just do a job that you're happy with; you have to have new goals in your yearly appraisal.

Now if you want to progress your career, that's great and we all start out eagerly when we first get a job. We put in the extra, unpaid hours because that's what you do to get noticed; but then life changes.
We age, we marry, get a mortgage, have children and perhaps we'd rather leave the office at five to spend time with them or with friends, rather than working until 9pm because there's a deadline and the company expects you to work those extra, unpaid hours otherwise you won't achieve all of last years goals on your appraisal and therefore you could jeopardise your bonus.

There's nothing wrong with reaching a certain level in your job and saying, 'This is me now.' Surely a firm should be glad to have someone who's happy in their work and therefore productive. They know their job inside out and will continue to maintain the high standards they've achieved.

But it isn't like that. There's this need for continuous development. I've worked with many people over the years and believe me, a lot of them should never have been put in charge of a team of people. I count myself as one of them.

In my last role before I left to write my first novel I was in charge of a team of six people. I'd only ever managed one person before. I'd previously worked in this department a couple of years prior (when there was only three of us but then a merger occurred). I returned there as a contractor to sort out some problems with their cash reconciliations. It was only after I'd started that I discovered the plan for me to take over the team. I was totally out of my depth and, although I knew exactly what the whole team did, as a person who naturally lacks confidence in himself, I was definitely the wrong person to be in charge. Still, it did make the decision to leave and write easier.

So, here I am, looking for a job. This week I was turned down for a part time role in a department store. After applying I had to answer a few questions based on different scenarios and having passed that stage I was then asked to record answers to four more questions (an awful process by the way, where your own voice sounds completely different and you start noticing mannerisms you never knew you had).

The store obviously has one set of standard questions and again, it's all about career development.
Q. Where do you see yourself in five years?
A. Living off the considerable proceeds of my first 7 seven novels while I write number 8; perhaps at my Caribbean holiday home.

It was a 20 hour a week job to serve customers in a shop, not an opportunity to become the next Richard Branson! So what was my real answer to the above question? I had to play the game and talk about a change of career, gaining retail experience to add to my finance experience so that I could move into a new role etc. Mind you, it didn't work so perhaps I should have just been honest and gone with the above answer after all or something like it.

Me: "Yes I'm happy to stay in the role for now but if I start outselling J K Rowling in six months I will have to leave."

Interviewer: "Well in that case welcome aboard. Let's look at your goals for next year shall we?"

So glad to be working from home

I've never been more glad to work from home than I have this week in this hot weather. The thought of the commute into London on hot, stuffy trains while wearing a suit; I really don't miss that.

I'm not one of those people who complain that it's not hot enough in England because this is what you end up with when the temperature rises; a hot, stuffy, damp heat. I'm much happier when it's about 12 to 15 degrees and you can wear a jacket. That's always the other thing. When it's this hot and I don't need a jacket then I have to find somewhere else for my wallet, phone & asthma pump and end up with large bulges in the trouser area...and not in a sexy way!

I'm sitting in my office now with the window and door open and a fan on. It's still hot but at least I can wear shorts and t-shirt and know that the fridge and cold beer aren't too far away.

I've just been reading through what I've written so far of my first draft of CRIME & NOURISHMENT. Most of the advice out there says to just keep writing the first draft until you've finished before checking it and I did that for my first two novels, but now I find I like to do a bit of editing as I go along. I've just added a new opening to the book so it seemed silly not to read through and amend parts that I've now written about in the prologue.

I must admit I'm very pleased with the result. I've found that the humour has taken over from the crime side of the story and I'm quite happy that it has. The story is still a murder mystery but now the main character gets into a lot of funny scrapes as she investigates it. I reached one point and for a split second thought to myself, 'I wonder how that bits going to pan out' before remembering that really; how it pans out is up to me.

I like not knowing where some bits are going. Usually I prefer to be in control but if a character wants to go down a different path then I let them go that way and see what happens. I'm introducing a new character in the next chapter (14) and having read through the draft, I've realised I've been building her up all the way through so now she needs a big entrance.

I guess I need something more than just writing "Ta-Dah!" when she appears.

Take Note

The new book, CRIME & NOURISHMENT, hasn't progressed as much as I'd have liked it too in the past week but I am pleased with the scene I've just written set at a Retirement Home where local Baronet, Sir Jasper is a resident. He's a bit of a dirty, old man really but gets away with it due to his age. He pretends to be sweet and innocent so that young ladies give him a hug or a kiss on the cheek which he really gets off on. He's the type of man that thinks a smack on the bum should be a compliment to a woman.

I only mention him and the Retirement Home here because they were both going to feature in my sequel to DRIVEN TO DISTRACTION before I decided to shelve the project. In that story Margaret, whom Derek met on the coach trip, has moved to Tenhamshire and runs the Home where Derek is gardener and her mother, Dora reigns supreme. Sir Jasper was going to be Dora's partner in crime.

Although I felt the book wasn't going to work after writing the first draft, the entire experience was by no means wasted and here I am using the main setting and one of the main characters of that story in another one. It pays to keep notes of things that may prove to be useful in the future.

I have a notebook where I write down ideas I have for stories and I also note down amusing situations or even just funny one-liners that may prove useful someday. If someone tells me about a funny situation they found themselves in and it resonates with me, it goes in the notebook. If I use it I will embellish the story and change it about.

Off the top of my head, Lauren's waxing stories in DRIVEN TO DISTRACTION came from a friend and the horse riding incident was basically my own experience. In NOTHING VENTURED, Diana getting club card points from paying for her husband's funeral with her supermarket credit card was also originally a friend's story.

I'd never use something that could potentially hurt or embarrass somebody but still, I'm guessing after reading this; my friends may be telling me a lot less in the future...or worse; want a percentage of my sales!