Julie A. Fast's Blog, page 7

The News is Getting Me Down

The news this morning really got me down. I’m currently editing one of my books to add more information for the second edition. The focus is on social media.

It’s astonishing how what we put in our brains comes out as a mood.

I have known this all along, but during this coronavirus quarantine it has become extremely clear that what I choose is what I reap.

If I choose to read the awful news all day long, I will feel awful.

If I choose to have just enough information to be safe and then put my focus on work, relationships and creativity, I will have a better day.

Bipolar disorder is a triggered illness. Anxiety is triggered illness. Psychosis is a triggered illness. If you are new to my work, I think you will really enjoy the Triggers chapters in Take Charge of Bipolar Disorder and Loving Someone with Bipolar Disorder.

If you’re struggling with apathy, fear and weariness, I think you would really find hope in the strategies from Get it Done When You’re Depressed.

I wrote these books to help myself, people with bipolar disorder and those who care about people with bipolar disorder to come up with the management plan.

Where do you choose to put your focus?

Julie

Related posts:
Update: A Passionate Plea… you don’t have to read the news.
You don’t have to watch the news.
How I Manage Bipolar Disorder Triggers… and how you can manage them too!

How to Deal with Disappointment When You Have Bipolar Disorder

This article was originally published in Bp Magazine….

When faced with disappointment, my brain never gives me the luxury of deciding how I feel and how I want to react. Nope. It just experiences it and immediately starts doing bipolar flips and twists in a way I find very hard to control.

Here I share two related stories about disappointment that led to intense bipolar downswings. By comparing how I responded to those disappointment downswings, you can see how I have taught myself to manage the illness differently over time. This is something I do each year that I use my management plan.

Letdown

Fifteen years ago, a person interviewed me for a new book on marketing. She invited me to lunch and asked me to share one of my main marketing ideas, in exchange for promoting my work. I did so willingly, including giving her information like what I called the marketing tool and how I invented the template I used with clients. I eventually spent hours working with her and shared my ideas with enthusiasm—all in the spirit of teamwork and future rewards.

Upon publication, she sent me a copy of the book. With great excitement, I opened the book … and to my true dismay, I could see that this person had used my ideas 100 percent, but my name was not to be found anywhere. It was pure plagiarism, and it shocked me into a massive downswing that lasted for months.

Disappointing situations are hard for everyone, but for a person with bipolar, they can cause serious illness. My bipolar brain picks a mood swing within seconds of a situation unfolding.  When I opened the chapter of the book that used my ideas verbatim, but without giving me credit, I didn’t just get angry or upset, I got sick. Really sick. I cried and cried and felt overwhelmed by the enormity of my mood swing.

The bipolar was triggered so intensely that I had to put all of my energy on myself just to get on with my daily life. I was ill for weeks. About a month later, I called the author to ask what had happened.

She said, “Oh, Julie. I wasn’t responsible for this—an editor made the changes to the chapter. They must have removed your name.”

I knew her editors and knew this was not true. She never gave them my name. I knew that I should contact her publishing company and do something about this, but I simply couldn’t do it. I was too sick. I remember this downswing lasting a long time. It lingered until it eventually festered into bitterness and created the seed of the idea that I was a victim and not in control of my career.

Lessons Learned

Believe it or not, just this week I found myself in a similar situation! Here is what happened.…

I recently spent a considerable amount of work energy on a project for a fellow person with an online presence, and I even made promises to do additional marketing on the project once it was available to the public. I assumed that my work would be quoted and that my books would be referenced.  Then, just like 15 years ago, I was sent a preview of the project, and I immediately realized that my work (and certainly my connections) were used, but I was not acknowledged for the work in the way I wanted or needed to be.

I kept looking through the project just for a mention of my work; when I found none in the body of the work … oh goodness, my bipolar brain was not happy!  I went into an immediate downswing. A big one. It just overcame my mind and body like a tidal wave.

It took the form of my usual bipolar disappointment downswing. I cried; my thoughts became very negative, and a bit scary; and I found it difficult to respond reasonably to the situation.  I was flooded. I was overwhelmed. One minute, I was excited to see the work and how she had used my ideas; and then, boom, I realize the truth and the bipolar tidal wave overtook me!

In my experience, bipolar disappointment downswings are not regular reactions to situations. Instead, they are over-the-top, intense, out-of-control reactions that immediately change my thoughts and feelings.  Oh, they are horrible!

But …

This story has a positive ending.

The situation was the same as 15 years ago, but I am not the person I was 15 years ago! Not at all!

I now have 15 more years of practice on how to manage this rotten illness when faced with a disappointment.  I was able to keep perspective and talk to others about what would be considered a reasonable response to the situation. I was eventually able to make a sensible decision on what I wanted to do next. (And I will not be working with this person in the future.)

I decided that my health comes first. I stuck to managing bipolar and was able to end the downswing by that evening:

I used my journal.
I asked for help.
I talked with my friends.
I practiced mindful breathing.
I watched YouTube videos on dealing with disappointment.
And I focused on what I needed instead of how I had been “wronged.”

In the end, I lost a day to the downswing. There was no way around this. I was sick. It was bipolar disorder, and I had to treat bipolar first. I cried a lot. I wrote a lot. I called on the wisdom of people I consider mentors in my life, including the work of Don Miguel Ruiz and his book The Four Agreements.

Peace Is Possible

I share my story to let you know that management plans work if you keep working on the management plan. If you start today, the situations that make you too sick to function for months will one day be situations that make you too sick to function for one day. The bipolar disappointment downswing may still be there, but your ability to manage the downswing can profoundly change. It has for me.

Peace in our brains is possible. We can learn to stop mood swings. We can stop ourselves from doing something in a mood swing that we will later regret. I wanted to write a nasty message to the person who used my work without the courtesy of giving me a quote to promote my work. But, you know what, that is her path, not mine. I didn’t have to do anything to the other person in order to feel better. I can do this work internally.

Now that the mood swing has calmed down, I can look at my own role in this situation. I can have perspective and act in a way that matches how I wish to be treated. My actions can come from the real me and not from bipolar disorder.

Peace.

Freedom from acting out of bipolar disorder disappointment.

Stability.

All are possible!

Julie

Related posts:
Is it Bipolar Depression or Disappointment?
Bipolar Disorder and Suicidal Depression Downswings
A thank you from Julie

What is Rapid Cycling Bipolar Disorder?

Do I have rapid cycling bipolar disorder? Does the person I care about have rapid cycling bipolar disorder?

This is a super important question. If you have rapid cycling and the majority of people I work with do have rapid cycling, this completely determines your treatment and management plan.

I talk about my own ultradian rapid cycling bipolar in the video below and explain how to determine what kind of rapid cycling you have… if this is part of your bipolar disorder.

After watching the video, please tell me about your mood swings.

Do you have the kind of bipolar that I have?

Or do you have the kind of bipolar that is less frequent but super intense?

If you care about someone with bipolar disorder, what kind of mood swings do you observe?

Julie

Related posts:
Rapid Cycling Bipolar Disorder
What is Rapid Cycling Bipolar Disorder?
Rapid Cycling Bipolar Disorder: Reader Question

How Does Scrolling Through Social Media Affect the Bipolar Mood?

My next project comes out in 2021. I’m revising one of my books and adding a social media chapter. I never could have imagined that working on this book would coincide with the majority of the world staying at home and spending so much time online.

This is a great time to examine how social media actually affects the mood.

If scrolling and watching YouTube videos all day makes a person feel better, then keep on scrolling!

But if the person is like myself, the horrible, often out of control scrolling and video watching simply leads to more OCD and sleepless nights. I find that it deeply affects my thoughts about myself and is rarely good for the #bipolar.

The new section of the book will spend a lot of time talking about the fact that social media is not real. And yesterday I saw a picture comparison that I think is possibly the best illustration of this in the entire world.

The picture on the left is Kylie Jenner without make up taken a couple of days ago. The picture on the right is an image from her Instagram around the same time.

She has the right to do what she wants. It’s her life. It’s her career. She’s incredibly successful and I often study her online process.

The problem I have is the duplicity in the images that use filters and excessive amounts of make up and how this affects young people.

But, as always a good friend of mine Tara Rolstad gave me another perspective. She said, “At the same time that this is happening, there are also tens of thousands if not hundreds of thousands of videos on Instagram that show the make up process and what people look like before. So maybe this is balancing things!”

May-be!

What I do know is that managing my social media intake is as important to my bipolar disorder management as medications.

Julie

Related posts:
Depressing media coverage of our ‘economic’ situation
How to Stop Obsessive Social Media Use if you Have Bipolar Disorder or OCD
Media Fast for Mental Health Happiness

Do I Have Anxiety?

Anxiety is common in bipolar, but will always be attached to mania and/or depression symptoms. It helps to know if you have anxiety when you’re not in a mood swing. If you do, the anxiety is separate from bipolar and needs to be addressed separately. The good news? Anxiety responds well to natural treatments. 


Anxiety is very common in people with bipolar, but it will always be attached to either a depression, mania or mixed mania episode. (Mixed mania is also called dysphoric mania.)  This means you will NOT have anxiety if the bipolar mood swing is not there as well.

This can all change if you experience a stressful event in life, especially if the event is unexpected and has nothing to do with your own actions or choices.

Anxiety can enter into your life at any age even if you’ve never had it separately from your bipolar disorder symptoms in the past.

During a world crisis,  anxiety can show up in anyone! Those of us with bipolar need to be extra careful when experiencing anxiety causing events as anxiety can then affect our bipolar.

I know! We rarely get a break!

The following is a simple check list to help you determine if anxiety is high in your life right now and if you need help for anxiety that is separate from your bipolar symptom management plan.

1. You are not noticeably depressed or manic.

2. You have thoughts such as, This is never going to end. I’m going to be stuck in this loop forever and I’m going to lose my mind if this happens. Life is so out of control and I don’t think I can handle what is going on at all.  What is happening to me! I have never been this stressed in my life! 

3. This is usually accompanied by noticeable breathing problems, usually shortness of breath or the inability to take a breath. It can also feel like chest pains and you might wonder if you’re having a heart attack.  The ribs can have sharp pains as well.

4. Along with 2 and 3, you will also find yourself scared to do behaviors that you normally do with ease such as going outside, talking with people on the phone or finding the positive side of a situation. Anxiety is all encompassing and fear is one of the main symptoms that keeps one from getting on with life.

These are just a few of anxiety’s many symptoms. If you have all of the above and feel really, really scared and out of breath, this is a panic attack.

Some common causes of non bipolar anxiety: 

– Head injuries, even mild concussions can increase anxiety.
– Overuse of caffeine.
– High THC cannabis marijuana.
– Energy drinks that include amnio acids such as taurine.
– A very stressful event that leads to anxiety. If the event is traumatic,  the resulting anxiety is called PTSD.
– A reaction to a medication.


What to do if the anxiety is really bad right now: 

1. Praise yourself for reading about the symptoms and doing something about them. Self awareness is the only way to finally get help for anxiety.
2. Practice even breathing. It’s the #1 treatment for anxiety, including intense panic attacks. The goal is to have the balance of oxygen and carbon dioxide remain steady. Breathe in for the same count that you breathe out and keep increasing the time between breaths. Pranayama yoga breathing videos can really help when the anxiety is flaring.
3. Use Cognitive Behavior Techniques (CBT). They really work with anxiety. You can talk yourself out of some pretty out of control and scary thoughts once you know that anxiety is the cause of what you’re going through.
4. Remove as much of the trigger as possible. During world events for example, I often go an entire day without looking at any social media. It helps immeasurably. Anxiety can turn into OCD type scrolling if left too long, so I make sure to remove any part of a trigger that’s in my control.

Anxiety responds extremely well to exercise that requires balanced breathing, talking yourself down from the out of control thoughts and ultimately removing as much of the trigger you are experiencing as possible.

In 2012, I had a biking accident that resulted in a serious head injury. A lasting effect of the injury was a strong anxiety disorder that is very separate from my bipolar disorder and psychotic disorder. The head injury didn’t affect my bipolar, but it created anxiety.  I now use the ideas in my bipolar and depression books to help myself manage the often overwhelming anxiety.

We can handle anything. We are strong people who happen to have really, really difficult brains. Knowing that what you are going through has a name: ANXIETY, can help you find natural relief from anxiety’s very life altering symptoms.

Julie

Related posts:
What are the Signs of Panic Attacks in Anxiety?
Bipolar, Anxiety and Panic Attacks
Do I Have Bipolar Anxiety or a Separate Anxiety Disorder?

Sleep Management Tips for People with Bipolar Disorder

Sleep is nature’s medicine for bipolar. It’s the #1 way to manage this rotten illness without side effects! Going to sleep on the same day you woke up can change your life. If you start this process today, you can fell better and be on a more regular sleep routine within a few months. No, it’s not easy! Nothing is easy when it comes to bipolar, but ask yourself this- do I want to rely on too many prescription medications or do I want to manage this illness as naturally as possibly using free and safe methods and then use less meds for what is left? That is what I choose!

9 Tips to Help Sleep With Bipolar

This article from HealthCentral rocks. I know I wrote it, but I still have to remind myself how to keep my sleep in order. I have bipolar. It’s not like it goes anywhere simply because I write an article about it! We are in this together. Let’s use SLEEP to manage bipolar and stop the over reliance on outside drugs and treatments that often have side effects. Yes, I DO believe in the use of meds for bipolar, but I believe in doing what I can on my own first!

From the article: Bipolar disorder responds well to a sleep plan that respects the body’s circadian rhythm. Learning to prevent mood swings by making good “sleep hygiene” choices is an inexpensive and natural way to prevent mania and depression. Sleep changes are not always easy in our very busy world, but please know that making even a few of the changes discussed here can reduce the need for certain medications and ultimately prevent mood swings.

You have so much more control over this illness than you know. You have the ability to regulate moods through sleep hygiene. Weird term, but it’s the truth!

Julie

 

Related posts:
Bipolar Disorder and Sleep: I want to fall asleep on my own tonight
Newsletter: Lamictal and bipolar disorder sleep problems
Tips for better sleep!

How to Stop Obsessive Social Media Use if you Have Bipolar Disorder or OCD

Related posts:
Music Tracking and Obsessive Thoughts in Bipolar Disorder.
Yes, you can work when you’re manic, depressed, anxious and obsessive
Charlie Sheen and Bipolar Disorder. What is the media’s responsibility?

Why I Record Bipolar Disorder Videos in My Car

Why I record videos in my car and why you should do what works for you!

Darn it.

Bipolar affects our work ability. Let’s remove the embarrassment of not being like everyone else and just do the work we can do.

My work ability is what it is. I can only do my best. You can only do your best. It is enough.

Julie

 

Related posts:
Julie’s Bipolar Treatment Videos!
Bipolar Rapid Cycling: A mood swing record?
Bipolar, A Day in the Life of …. Me

Do Not Give Up. Do Not Give In! Get Up! Get Out! Get it Done!

Holy – what words can I use here that will not offend anyone! Holy guacamole. Holy heck.  H E Double Toothpicks as we used to say when I went to grade school in the south.

This sucks. The Coronavirus isolation simply sucks for those of us who need human contact to better manage our moods.

If you are struggling, you’re normal. I am struggling and I have a good management plan in place. I am thinking of what it’s like for people newly diagnosed with bipolar or those who have OCD or high anxiety at the best of times!

These are not good times for any of us with mental health disorders, so let’s do something about it today.

If you are isolating, make a call. I don’t care who you call, just call someone. I have to force myself to do this as well. Depression makes me isolate.

CRAP!

If you’re sleeping is off, let’s get it back on track. NOW. The #1 way to make yourself more ill and this means being sick when the darn isolation is finally over is to get off a regular sleep schedule. You can get back on track now so that you won’t be in HELL in a few months. Please. If there is one thing you do during quarantine to help yourself stay table, it is managing sleep. We can do this.

If you have Get it Done When You’re Depressed, now is a GREAT time to get it out and choose the strategies that best fit your situation. I’ve been using it since day one of coronavirus quarantine.

If you don’t have it, the Kindle version can be there in a few minutes. Help is on the way!

The main goal is to get out of bed and get on with life every day. This is the foundation for surviving this world crisis.

Julie

 

 

Related posts:
Never Give Up: Getting Better When You Have Bipolar Disorder
Bipolar disorder and severe depression…
Podcast: reader question – I need help for my son when I travel…

Ending Bipolar Depression Isolation

This article was originally published in BP Magazine.

I used to think that being alone was a strength. I grew up with the very 1980s idea that “we have to learn to be alone in order to really be with another person.” I now believe that for people with bipolar depression, the opposite is true—we need human contact to get us out of a down mood swing.

Depression makes me isolate. It makes me see the phone as an instrument of torture. I turn to social media instead of reaching out to live human beings. Depression tells me that being alone is all I deserve and that life is a lonely path I travel without support or love. Wow, I’m stable as I write this and it’s obvious to me that it makes no sense. But when I’m depressed? Totally believe it. Here’s a recent example in my life:

I’m depressed. I need contact, but I can’t reach out. I’m lying in my bed watching another British mystery while there are three messages from friends on my phone. I have the thought, “No one cares about me, which is why no one is calling me. I’m destined to be alone, lying on a bed in a dark room instead of getting out in the world. This is my life and it’s horrible.”

What is wrong with this picture? So much! It’s not rational. At the exact moment that my brain is telling me I have no friends and will be alone forever, I have multiple messages from people who care about me and are waiting for me to respond. Surprise: depression isn’t rational.

This isn’t loneliness! It’s illness. This is what I call “depression isolation.”

My depressed brain isn’t a good reporter. It lies and tells me information that is in direct contrast to what is happening in the real world. The worst part is, when I’m depressed I listen to my ill brain instead of listening to the messages from my good friends.

When I’m stable, life moves forward with ease. I answer my phone. I make plans. I don’t cry and worry and ruminate over my past. Stability is my goal in life.

Here are two things I’ve taught myself to do when I realize I’m sitting alone in my room instead of interacting with life. It’s never easy, and on some days I’m lucky if I can do one, but I will always try until I’m better.

I turn off social media and force myself to be with human beings. I regularly have to remind myself that social media is a tool that works when I’m well, but when I’m depressed it is a horrible isolator that makes me feel much worse.
I focus on outcome instead of on my current feelings. I make myself do the opposite of what I feel like doing—even if it often feels worse than a root canal in the moment. But I do this in order to have a better future. I make rules like, “Julie, you will answer your phone no matter how you feel in the moment. You will say yes to invitations. You will reach out to others!” Being my own drill sergeant is what works when my brain is telling me incorrect information.

If you’re depressed right now, pat yourself on the back for reading this! You have already started the process of getting out of your depression by looking for help. If you love someone with bipolar who is isolating, create a plan on your own and then show it to them when they are well. Go over and see them—in person, face to face. Send them a hand-written card—through the mail, not online. Slip a note under their door. Do something real to show them you’re right here whenever they come out of the fog of isolation. And most importantly, whether for yourself or for someone you love, start now and put a plan in place to prevent the mood swing from getting so far the next time.

The ’80s were an interesting time in many ways, and I did learn to be a strong woman. But not every lesson I learned back then was right. There’s a difference between learning to be alone, and feeling isolated and unlovable. When I’m depressed, the answer to isolation is people. Who’s with me?

Julie

Related posts:
The End of Bipolar Disorder Depression Isolation
Hope for people with what seems like never ending depression!
Depression Doesn’t Care: How I Manage My Bipolar Depression