Julie A. Fast's Blog, page 50

Depression Euphemisms- They helped me get through the day!

I’m not doing my best.

I’m happy to be here. Thanks for asking.

I’m having a tough day, but it’s better now that I’m out of the house.

It’s not a great day, but I’m happy to see you!

I’m using my treatment plan!

It’s chasing me today.

It’s lurking.

There are many more. Usually, I just say- “I’m really depressed today.” or, “Yesterday was really tough.”

Since I wrote Get it Done When You’re Depressed I feel better- I can visualize the list of tips in the front of the book and pick one when the days are tough.

Bla. Dumb depression. Terrible depression! But I will not let it ruin my life. The days may be difficult, but I will keep going- always.

Julie

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Published on June 20, 2014 00:01

Bipolar Disorder and Travel? Think Ahead About Your Meds

I just had an email from a person who is moving to China. He wondered how he would get his Lamictal and Risperdal in China.

Here is my answer….

**

You ask an important question about medications. Lamictal is with Glaxo Smith Kline. Risperdal is from Janssen. – I would assume they have different contracts with different countries. Of course, if you are taking generics, you should talk with your pharmacy and see how they work with other countries.

If you still take the brand names:

Here is the contact for Glaxo Smith Kline- the makers of Lamictal. 1-888-825-5249

Here is the number for Janssen- the makers of Risperdal: 1-800-526-7736

I am sure they can answer your questions or at least point you in the right direction. Considering all of the people from the US who are working in or moving to China, there must be a way to get the information.

I took Lamictal for five years- it worked wonderfully for me when my depression simply wouldn’t calm down. I certainly never thought I would use the word medication and wonderful in the same sentence! But I love the fact that there are some drugs out there that work without 24 hour side effects. The generic for Lamictal is lamotrigine.

I always stock up on the meds before I travel so that I have emergency rations when I’m there. You can also leave extra meds with a family member in the States. I always recommend this when a person travels. You can ask for extra meds from your doctor-though it’s not loved by insurance, your health care professional can prescribe a higher dose than you take, so that you can have extra meds.

If you simply have a copay for your meds, then this saves you a LOT of money.

Also, if you travel with meds on your way there, make sure they are clearly labeled- you can even take a letter from your doctor. Just in case.

As you probably know, a move can be a big, big trigger for bipolar disorder- especially mania. A lot of this has to do with sleep changes. I suggest you have a plan in place before you leave. I have lived in Japan and traveled in China, so I know the risks that come with the excitement.

I’m very impressed that you’re taking care of things before you travel- believe it or not, some people don’t and that’s when problems start.

Julie

PS: I just had a great comment below about my opinion on generic Lamictal. Michael asked if I had changed my mind about Lamictal and it’s generic form lamotrigine- I answered the comment with the following:

Hi Michael, this blog chronicles my experience with generic Lamictal (lamotrigine) the first month it came out many years ago. You probably read an older post. It was not well regulated and people all over the world were having different experiences with the lamotrigine. It didn’t work for me at all- whereas others found it exactly the same as the brand Lamictal. It’s now many years later and the generic lamotrigine seems to be working fine for people. Lamictal is the most benign of all bipolar disorder drugs- yes, it has the rash- but if you’re careful, the rash is extremely rare. Overall, it helps the most for bipolar II and has the least side effects of any bipolar disorder drug on the market. These days, I think it’s very safe to use the lamotrigine. I stuck with brand name Lamictal for years simply because I didn’t want to risk the generics. Now, if I were jut starting out with a prescription, I would take the lamotrigine- but if it didn’t work, I would try the Lamictal. The problem is that Lamictal is incredibly expensive and insurance companies don’t like to use it. I believe in big management plans with the least drug use possible, but many of us must take drugs and Lamictal/ lamotrigine is a good one. Julie

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Published on June 19, 2014 00:30

Author, Speaker, Health Advocate Karen Tyrell: Guest Blogger Update!

Welcome back Karen Tyrell!

Many of our readers have asked for updates from our guest bloggers so we reached out to see what they were up to. Karen Tyrrell has been busy and is excited to announce her next great project, her latest children’s book, Stop the Bully has arrived! Here is a wonderful update from Karen: If you would like to read her original guest blog post for BipolarHappens.com, click here.

I, Karen Tyrrell, am an Australian award winning mental health author and teacher, as well as a survivor of Bipolar Disorder. I keep myself resilient on a day to day basis with my pro-active wellness plan. When I was a teacher, parents at my school bullied me to the breaking point, triggering bipolar disorder. I wrote Me and Her: A Memoir of Madness, this was my journey into and out of bipolar. Later I published the sequel Me and Him: A Guide to Recovery, two books in one. Part 1 is a self-help manual with 30 steps to recovery and wellness. Part 2 is a memoir from the caregiver’s perspective revealing the effect bipolar had on my husband, Steve.

Why I write Mental Health books for Children

I’m a passionate mental health advocate for children. Prevention is better than cure in my opinion. I write empowering books to lift children’s moods, strengthen their resilience, boosting self-esteem and self-confidence. I wrote Bailey Beats the Blah, an empowering picture book to help kids overcome sad days and worry thoughts.

BLURB: Bailey hates his new school. His tummy aches. He has no friends.

His dog Fuzzy slobbers all over him. BLAH! How can Bailey change his BLAH to HA-HA-HA?

I was bullied as a child and as a teacher. Now I’m an anti-bullying campaigner educating children, teaching empathy and resilience. My junior novel STOP the Bully empowers boys and girls with assertive anti-bullying strategies, revealing the bullying dilemma from all perspectives.

BLURB: Eleven year old Brian is hiding something. His life is falling apart. Dad abandoned the family. Brian hates his new school. And now an aggressive bully attacks him every day. Can Brian STOP the Bully without revealing his shameful secret?

I enjoy presenting storytelling sessions, pantomimes and author talks at schools, libraries and festivals. STOP the BULLY is endorsed by Kids Helpline, teachers and counsellors. Download FREE teacher notes and FREE kids activities from my website. STOP the BULLY is available on Amazon Kindle for just $3.99 here.

Thanks for the opportunity to tell your readers about what I’ve been up to.

Visit KarenTyrell.com to read more about my work. Here is my Twitter @Karen_Tyrrell.

- Thank you! Karen

**

PS: Wow, what an inspiration! Please ask Karen any questions you have below and I will make sure she get them and answers them on the site! Julie

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Published on June 18, 2014 10:13

Pt 1 What are the Symptoms of Bipolar Disorder Dysphoric Mania?

What is Dysphoric Mania?

Dysphoric mania, also known as agitated or mixed mania is a bipolar disorder mood swing that is often missed due to confusing symptoms.

Dysphoric mania is the opposite of euphoric mania- it’s still a chemically elevated (in terms of energy) mood- but it has none of the good feelings associated with euphoric mania. Dysphoric mania is very confusing for the person in the mood swing. The anger can be so quick and so real.

I am angry at you for many things! I’m just angry! Leave me alone. Stop bugging me!

I don’t have a problem. Why don’t you look at yourself! You are the one with the problem! It can’t always be me. You’ve been getting on my case about this for years. In fact, just last month on the 21st I remember that you said something about my behavior.

I’ve changed. My eyes are open and what I thought I wanted isn’t good enough. I want out. I couldn’t tell you this before because I didn’t know I was so unhappy.

Why do you always want to change me? Can’t you just see that this is who I am and your snooping into my life is just making me want out more than ever.

Part 2 of this blog has a bipolar disorder dysphoric manic checklist!

Julie

Here is a question from Maddie about the above blog:

Hi Julie,

Right now I’m so p.o’d with everyon, even if I don’t want to be and I know I shouldn’t. But omg! I want to say I feel a little psychotic depressive (if its possible to only be a little psychotic) hallucinations, constant anxiety and fear, thoughts of killing (myself and others even though I don’t feel like acting upon them) I imagine my wrists slit open or see myself get hit by a bus, etc. I feel like every person I pass is watching me and is going to do something. Its so bad -does this sound like bipolar psychosis? I am bipolar (not officially so I can’t say if bipolar I or bipolar II etc.)

Maddie.

Hi Maddie,

When I’m pissed off at EVERYONE it tends to be bipolar disorder. It’s pretty hard to be mad at the world- there are usually a few good people who don’t deserve our anger! This is usually anxiety or a mixed episode for me- also called dysphoric mania. You can use your sleep as a guide- if you see significant changes in your sleep, it’s usually mania. If you have trouble sleeping due to restless thoughts- but can still sleep, it’s usually anxiety. Also, what are the possible triggers. I just wrote my latest column for BP Magazine and it’s about giving up the triggers that make us sick, even if we like the triggers!

What you describe 100% sounds like stress psychosis. I get it when life is too hectic- such as when I have to speak in front of a big crowd or I’m in a situation I can’t control. I always called the hallucinations where I saw myself get killed- ‘death images.’ Then I realized it was psychosis. Homicidal thoughts are common too- wanting to kill someone out of anger is a scary feeling. The thinking that people are watching you is typical paranoia. If you are experiencing this with depression, then it could be bipolar. But the only way you can have bipolar is if you have had an obvious hypomanic or manic episode. You can look on my blog subject menu for more information on psychosis and mania. I definitely suggest you go see someone for an evaluation. Psychosis is not super common, so something is going on with your brain that can be fixed! If you want to find out a more general description of bipolar disorder, my book Take Charge of Bipolar Disorder is the best option. I suggest you see if you fit the symptoms for bipolar II and then go get some help. There is no way you want to live like this- and I know from personal experience that you can get a LOT better. Julie

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Published on June 18, 2014 09:01

PT 2 What are the Symptoms of Bipolar Disorder Dysphoric Mania?

Dysphoric mania checklist: Do any of these sound familiar?

You feel agitated and uncomfortable in the body and mind- this is different than anxiety!
The depression feels active- it’s not catatonic or sedating.
The mind feels jumbled- but energized in a negative way. You may have thoughts such as, “I hate my life. I hate my work. I’ve got to get out of here.”
You’re very easily irritated. This can lead to punching things, yelling and picking fights with those you normally treat with love.
Road rage with a lot of yelling.
You cuss far more than normally- or may even have thoughts and say things that are completely against character.
Sleep is completely disturbed due to the mania.

Take Charge of Bipolar Disorder and the Health Cards Treatment System for Bipolar Disorder have a treatment plan for all kinds of mania. I also discuss dysphoric mania in my free Bipolar Disorder 101 coaching call. Info on how to listen to the call is on the menu bar.

Let’s learn about dysphoric mania so that it doesn’t ruin relationships and lives.

Julie

PS: I once had a 6 week dysphoric manic episode that caught me 100% by surprise. My obsessions were buying a Dodge Charger and moving to Barcelona. Thank heavens I had a management plan in place or I would be driving a gas guzzling car in Spain!

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Published on June 18, 2014 00:55

Bipolar Disorder and Brain Chatter

Hi Julie,

On your radio show from a few years ago, you spoke of your “brain chatter”? Can you explain what you mean by this?For myself, sometimes I just run the same words over and over in my head when I am anxious, maybe in a group of people. I do not believe it to be psychosis (i.e. audio hallucinations), or even a delusion, but one thing I do know it to be: annoying. It is even as if it exists in a certain physical location in my skull.

Weird—huh?

I told my sister about it who said, “No you don’t!”

I lied and agreed with her, “You’re right, I don’t.”

C.

Hi C.

Ah, brain chatter. This is what I call the brain in a blender feeling I get when I’m sick. I have so many thoughts and sounds in my head I have trouble functioning. It’s like having a group of people following me around while talking to each other through my ears.

I get it with agitated depression – the opposite would be catatonic depression where I don’t really have thoughts at all.

Agitated depression is noisy- there are often comments about what you’re doing wrong and how you’re never succeed. You can hear conversations you have already had or ones you’re going to have.

The brain chatter is really bad when I’m psychotic as the noises are distorted and very confusing. They just won’t be quiet. Sometimes I hear someone talking to me or feel like I’m at a very loud party where I’m not a welcome guest.

You can have manic brain chatter as well.

I simply use the term brain chatter to mean the thoughts, sounds, noises, voices, music, etc in your head that you don’t want there. You didn’t ask for it and you want it to go away so that you can think clearly.

When I started to get a lot better last year, the main improvement was LESS BRAIN CHATTER.

My book Get it Done When You’re Depressed has techniques for getting rid of it.

That’s funny that you had to lie to your sister! We can’t expect everyone to understand our weird brains!

Julie

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Published on June 17, 2014 00:17

Breathing Underwater. The Bipolar Depression Returns.

I got really sick for three days last week. It was terrible. I thought my two month stability streak was going to last forever.

I’m always shocked when the depression comes back full force. It is so nasty and horrible. No one can understand it, unless they have a mood disorder!

It’s like living underwater with no air- but you don’t die! You just struggle!

All of us with bipolar disorder know what it is like.

The day it started I said to myself, “Oh no. It’s back. But I’m going to get rid of it starting now.”

It sounds like a cliche, but that is how I have to talk to myself when I get sick.

In three days it was gone. I’m a lot better today. I woke up and knew I was fine – I knew this because I woke up and didn’t think that getting up was pointless. I just got on with my day. It’s so wonderful to have a normal day!

Julie

Thanks for the pics from Miss E. They depict what it feels like sometimes! Alive, but underwater!

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Published on June 16, 2014 00:22

Bipolar Happens! is a Top Bipolar Disorder Book on the Kindle!

Bipolar Happens: 35 Tips and Tricks to Manage Bipolar Disorder is a top ten Bipolar Disorder Book on the Kindle!

That’s exciting. I went to the Kindle store to see how my books Loving Someone with Bipolar Disorder and Take Charge of Bipolar Disorder were doing on the bipolar disorder page. These books are in the top ten ranking- and then I saw that Bipolar Happens! was right up there as well!

Fantastic! Bipolar Happens! is an enjoyable book about a serious topic.

Guess what- it’s only $.99 I want it to be available to everyone.

Yes, I think this is a great deal and a good way to get helpful information about bipolar disorder at minimum cost. Bipolar Happens! was my first book. I knew I wanted to talk about how I manage the illness, but I also wanted to tell stories about how it affects my life daily.

There are stories about anger, manic spending, anxiety at a baseball game and what it feels like to be psychotic! It’s a book that family members love too. I love it myself. It’s hopeful.

Click here to go to amazon.com. You can read part of the book and then add it to your Kindle. Wow, $.99!

Julie

PS: If you’re new to my work, this is a great way to experience my writing style and the quality of my information. If you like it, you can come back for more.

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Published on June 16, 2014 00:06

The World Cup, Twitter and Managing Bipolar Disorder!

If you are, you may know I had to close my personal football account due to OCD. But I have continued Tweeting for the bar where I’m watching all the matches! It’s called Beulahland. You can find my tweets here. @BeulahlandPDX.

I try to do funny stuff. I’ve found that writing about soccer or interacting with all of the journalists I know is simply too much for me. Here is a latest post. Isn’t it amazing that I can do work anonymously- but as soon as my name is out there in the world and people I don’t know start to comment on what I say and do, I start to get sick. Managing this illness is ALL about finding what you can and can’t do, dealing with the disappointment and then moving on! I’ve dealt with this illness since age 17. I’m still learning! Julie

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Published on June 15, 2014 10:47

A Bipolar Story About Cabbage

I just received a great email from a reader who has been on the bipolarhappens.com mailing list for years.

I once wrote a newsletter for family members that started out with a conversation my mother and I had about cabbage. I told the story to show how family members have to be educated as to why those of us with bipolar disorder can be so WEIRD! Here is his letter- the cabbage story follows.

Hi Julie:

This really isn’t a question but rather a comment regarding a piece you wrote about fixing dinner with your mother one night. You were making a salad and your mom suggested adding cabbage. As I recall you said it was just too difficult to get it out of the refrigerator and cut it, etc. Your mother said something like “what’s so hard about that?” and you said, I think, “I have bi polar.” Enough said!!

Ever since then every time I find it difficult (impossible???) to do something as “easy” (oh sure!) as preparing a meal or responding to an e-mail, etc, etc I always think of it as a “Bi Polar Cabbage Moment.”

I cannot begin to tell you how much this helps me! I won’t be able to listen to your radio broadcast so let just say thanks so much for all you do.

(Horace) Bruce Deal

New York, NY

**

A Conversation about Cabbage

Mom: Why don’t you put some cabbage on your salad?

Julie: I want to have cabbage on my salad but it is just too hard to do it.

Mom: Julie! It’s too hard to have cabbage? What is your problem?

Julie: It’s not just cabbage, Mom! It’s getting it out of the fridge. Taking off the old leaves, finding a place to cut it, making sure the knife is clean, slicing it, putting it on the salad and then cleaning up the cutting board. It is too much right now.

Mom: It really is just cabbage, Julie. Why does everything have to be so hard for you?

Julie: Mom. It is not a *normal* thing! It is not a cabbage thing. It is *bipolar* thing. It is an overwhelmed thing. It has nothing to do with cabbage. Things are hard for me because I have bipolar disorder.

Mom: Ok. I understand it a bit better when you put it that way. Would you like me to do the cabbage for you?

PS: If you sign up for my newsletter, you will get the full story of my mom and the cabbage! Julie

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Published on June 15, 2014 00:11