Tristan Taormino's Blog, page 16

Aug 9: Margaret Cho and Jim Short on stand up, anal, public sex, BDSM, body-shaming, queer identity, Margaret’s latest one woman show Mother, Drop Dead Diva, The View, and open marriage

I am so excited for this week’s episode of Sex Out Loud! Comedians Margaret Cho and Jim Short sat down with me in New York for an unforgettable conversation. Margaret dishes on her new one-woman show Mother, her recent appearance on The View, the body-shaming experience she’ll never forget, why she thinks she doesn’t have a G-spot, and her role on the hit show Drop Dead Diva. Plus, Margaret, Jim, and I talk about anal pleasure, public sex, BDSM, double penetration, and open marriage—nothing is off limits in this frank, provocative discussion—you do not want to miss it! Mark your calendar, set your alerts, even plan a listening party with friends – Friday, August 9th at 8 pm ET / 5 pm on Voice America.

Margaret Cho is a comedian, actress, author, and singer-songwriter. She got her big break when she starred in the groundbreaking ABC sitcom, All-American Girl in 1994. In 1999, her off Broadway one-woman show, I’m The One That I Want, toured the country to national acclaim and was made into a bestselling book and feature film. Other national tours include Notorious C.H.O., Revolution, Assassin, Beautiful, and Cho Dependent; she is currently on tour with her latest one-woman show Mother. She starred in The Cho Show on VH-1 in 2008, and since 2009 has played Teri on the hit show Drop Dead Diva on Lifetime Television, now in its fifth season. She co-hosts the podcast Monsters of Talk with comedian Jim Short. Throughout her career, Margaret has been honored by GLAAD, American Women in Radio and Television, the Lambda Legal Defense and Education Fund, the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force, the Asian American Legal Defense and Education Fund (AALDEF), and PFLAG for making a significant difference in promoting equal rights for all, regardless of race, sexual orientation or gender identity. She has been nominated for an Emmy Award (for her guest star role on 30 Rock) and two Grammy Awards (for her comedy albums Revolution and Cho Dependent).

Jim Short is a stand-up comedian originally from Australia. Jim tours regularly throughout the United States and his act comprises a mix of personal observations on pop and social culture, world media and history, and television and music references. He performed at the 2004 Montreal International Just For Laughs Comedy Festival, where he was deemed one of the “Talk of the Fest” performers. He won the 2004 San Francisco International Stand Up Competition. Jim has made numerous television appearances, including Shorties Watchin’ Shorties, Late Show with David Letterman, The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson, Late Night with Conan O’Brien, John Wants Answers, and Comedy Central’s Premium Blend. He co-hosts the podcast Monsters of Talk with Margaret Cho.

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This post, Aug 9: Margaret Cho and Jim Short on stand up, anal, public sex, BDSM, body-shaming, queer identity, Margaret’s latest one woman show Mother, Drop Dead Diva, The View, and open marriage originally appeared on Pucker Up on August 3, 2013. Tweet This Post!

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Aug 2: Plus-Size Powerhouse April Flores on ‘Fat Girl’ Book and CatalystCon Founder Dee Dennis on Sex-Positive Activism

Tune in this Friday, August 2nd at 8 pm ET / 5 pm PT to a new episode of Sex Out Loud! Dee Dennis joins me to talk about the genesis of Catalyst Con, the bi-annual conference she founded. We’ll discuss the September event in Woodland Hills and highlight the diverse line up of speakers. Plus, Dee will share her thoughts on the current state of sex-positive activism and how to push the movement forward. Then, fresh from her appearance at the Museum of Contemporary Art in Los Angeles, plus-size model and performer April Flores dishes about “Fat Girl,” the new fine art photography book by her partner Carlos Batts, which features more than a decade of their collaborative work together. She’ll also talk about their latest art project, Toe vs. Heel.

This week’s show is live, so find out all the ways to listen here and you can call in with questions at 1-866-472-5788, join the discussion on Facebook or Twitter, or even e-mail me via tristan(at)puckerup.com and I’ll read them live on the air!

An activist in the field of sexuality, Dee Dennis started her career as a sex blogger, writing about the end of her marriage and starting the next chapter in her life. Through this metamorphosis, Dee discovered her passion for sexuality rights and issues for people around the world. Dee’s commitment to taking the conversation about sexuality offline and into the real world lead in part to the creation of MOMENTUM, a conference she co-founded to empower people to come together and exchange ideas that would further the conversations about sexuality, inspire people and motivate them to carry the conversation forward. In 2012, Dee founded CatalystCon, which she regards as a “melting pot of sexuality” that unites sex educators, sexologists, sex workers, writers, activists, and anyone with a passion for creating change. To Dee, “knowledge is power, and sharing that knowledge is the first spark in igniting change.” This is the fundamental principle behind CatalystCon.

April Flores is a muse, erotic performer, and model, but that’s not even scratching the surface. A fearless BBW star with scarlet hair, proponent of the queer community, feminist, sex-positive activist, outspoken advocate of body diversity, glamorous art model, avid kink fan, sub and dom both, and all around powerful woman. April has graced the covers of Bizarre and AVN Magazines, among others; modeled for dozens of fine art photographers; Featured Guest & Co Host Espanol on Playboy Sirius/XM Radio; appeared in countless adult films in every genre of the porn industry (from mainstream to queer to kinky to artsy); and spoken out about body image through her mere presence and powerful sexuality, along with her activism.

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This post, Aug 2: Plus-Size Powerhouse April Flores on ‘Fat Girl’ Book and CatalystCon Founder Dee Dennis on Sex-Positive Activism originally appeared on Pucker Up on August 1, 2013. Tweet This Post!

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Good Vibrations: August is Anal Pleasure Month

Pioneering Sex Positive Retailer Invites You to Get Cheeky with Educational Workshops & Timeline

SAN FRANCISCO (August 1, 2013): August is “Anal Pleasure Month” according to Good Vibrations, the trusted San Francisco-based company that takes pride in providing accurate information on sexuality and toys for grown-ups. In celebration of this theme they have put together an impressive timeline of the history of anal sex, along with a month of workshops and events in California to bring know-how and pleasure to the people.

“While anal pleasure is widely enjoyed, it is still considered taboo, so access to clear and accurate information about it is sadly limited. Good Vibrations declared August to be Anal Pleasure month as a way to illuminate the subject and make information available to interested adults. You can see how the cultural conversation around anal sex has evolved in our anal history timeline –- it’s fun and fascinating!” says Staff Sexologist Dr. Carol Queen.

Good Vibrations has also teamed up with famed sex educator and author Tristan Taormino to celebrate Anal Pleasure Month on her Sex Out Loud Radio show where she’ll be discussing the ins and outs of safe and fun anal play. Tristan directed The Expert Guide to Anal Sex and has her own collection of favorite sex toys at Good Vibrations, including “Back Door Beginner” kit and Beginner Pegging Kit and also contributed to Good Vibrations’ anal history timeline. This and other anal safe toys will be featured in the month of August.

Follow along online as Anal Sex Month highlights useful resources and information, normalizing and celebrating anal pleasure. Good Vibrations’ Social Networks including Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest, Tumblr, Google Plus, and even Instagram and Vine with hashtag #analpleasuremonth.

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This post, Good Vibrations: August is Anal Pleasure Month originally appeared on Pucker Up on August 1, 2013. Tweet This Post!

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Samantha & Michael: Behind the Scenes of Tristan Taormino’s Guide to Bondage for Couples for Adam & Eve Blog #1

As a follow up to Tristan Taormino’s Guide to Kinky Sex for Couples, I directed Tristan Taormino’s Guide to Bondage for Couples for Adam & Eve, which stars Skin Diamond, Derrick Pierce, Adrianna Luna, James Deen, Samantha Ryan, Michael Vegas, India Summer and Danny Wylde. It was also lots of fun to make, and I want to share some stories from the set along with photos. The first scene features Samantha Ryan and Michael Vegas, two performers I’ve never worked with before who’ve been on my wish list.

Their scene together kicks off the film with some of the simplest do-it-yourself bondage, including a neck tie (yes, we used the Grey Tie, the one from Fifty Shades of Grey) and Samantha’s stockings. I decided to bring an unopened package of a personal pair of Agent Provocateur silk stockings to use. They wound up being incredibly difficult for Samantha to wrangle: they didn’t have the give that stockings usually have, so they were hard to get on and off and would wrinkle in odd places. So much for luxury! A pair from the drugstore probably would have worked better!

Samantha and Michael also used one of my favorite accessories: bondage tape, which is incredibly versatile. The pair has wonderful chemistry, and the sex and bondage is playful and romantic. They are well matched because they both enjoy passionate sex that unfolds spontaneously. Michael is a total lover — warm, sweet, and funny. Samantha is insanely intelligent and we had a really heady conversation after her scene while we ate lunch. I really liked both of them and cannot wait to work with them again.

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This post, Samantha & Michael: Behind the Scenes of Tristan Taormino’s Guide to Bondage for Couples for Adam & Eve Blog #1 originally appeared on Pucker Up on August 1, 2013. Tweet This Post!

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Carlos Batts’s New Book FAT GIRL, feat. April Flores

Rare Bird Books is pleased to announce the publication of Fat Girl, photographer Carlos Batts’ latest fine art book, available at bookstores nationwide and on Amazon.com. Fat Girl represents twelve years worth of Batts’ photographs of his wife and muse, famed plus-size model and adult film star April Flores. Miss Rosen wrote the foreword to Fat Girl, and Flores contributes the introduction and several personal essays. The book, Batts’ fourth published collection, features photographs of Flores from the intimate and informal to the highly stylized and outrageous, including rare, never-before-seen images like the highly mythologized early blonde Polaroids. Batts presents his subject as both virtuous and vulgar, at once romantic and ravenous, with images that challenge society’s assumptions about beauty, desirability, identity, performance, and sexual subjectivity. “I knew that I wanted to redefine and change the meaning of the term “Fat Girl.” To me, fat would no longer be the negative word had been and was to so many others. I wanted to take away the shame, and make those words have a positive, empowering connotation.,” writes Flores.

Together, Batts and Flores have created a visual text that beautifully explores some of the most complex cultural issues, including racial identity, beauty aesthetics, and body politics. Their collaboration also reflects the different communities that Batts and Flores belong to and draw inspiration from, including various underground art scenes, the world of independent filmmaking, West Coast queer communities, and the feminist porn movement. Fat Girl provides a glimpse into a world where sex, love, and art collide.

Batts and Flores will celebrate the release of Fat Girl with two events on July 27 in Los Angeles. There will be a discussion about the book and a book signing from 3:00-6:00 pm at the Ahmanson Auditorium at MOCA Grand Avenue at 250 Grand Avenue. An exhibit of photographs from Fat Girl and reception will take place from 7:00-11:00 pm at Coagula Curatorial, 977 Chung King Road. The event will feature a nail bar by Cha Cha Covers, Cupcakes by Little Sweeties, and a spanking station sponsored by The Pleasure Chest.

FAT GIRL Talk/Q&A & Book Signing

M.O.C.A. Grand Auditorium & Book Store

Carlos Batts & April Flores will talk about there careers working together and their new book

Fat Girl.

Saturday, July 27, 3pm-6pm

MOCA FB INVITE: https://www.facebook.com/events/198489753647572/

Fat Girl Book Exhibit

Gallery: Coagula Curatorial

Date: Saturday, July 27th

Time: 7pm-11pm

Location: 977 Chung King Road, Los Angeles CA 90012

COAGULA FB INVITE: https://www.facebook.com/events/192279797603848/

 

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This post, Carlos Batts’s New Book FAT GIRL, feat. April Flores originally appeared on Pucker Up on July 24, 2013. Tweet This Post!

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July 26: Petra Joy on Art-Core Films and Sex from a Female Perspective

Petra Joy is an award-winning filmmaker, photographer, and journalist who currently lives and works in England and makes “art-core” films from a female perspective. This Friday on Sex Out Loud at 5pm PT / 8 pm ET, she’ll discuss Sexual Sushi, the first film she produced and directed, as well as Her Porn, a series she began in 2008 to give fellow female directors a place to collect and distribute their work. Petra Joy will also discuss the Joy Awards, her ongoing collaboration with Candida Royalle and the impending launch of Cinema Joy, her own eclectic Video On Demand channel streaming with her own erotic films as well as films by other feminist porn directors whose work she loves.

After graduating in 1990 with an MA in film studies and history, Petra Joy worked for almost two decades as a freelance television director producing over 50 documentaries, mostly on (female) sexuality. This work took her to England where she still resides. In 2004, Petra produced and directed her first erotic film, Sexual Sushi . This unique erotic film, featuring a real-life couple and an artistic approach to erotic filmmaking, became a surprise success – even though or because it broke all the mainstream porn rules. Encouraged by this success Petra directed to date four more “art-core” films from a female perspective (Female Fantasies, Feeling it, The Female Voyeur, A Taste of Joy) that won multiple awards all over the world.

Finding similar-minded female directors through festival appearances and networking, Petra began to curate and publish the best-selling Her Porn series in 2008, giving fellow female directors a place to collect and distribute their work that may otherwise have gone unnoticed by many. Encouraged by the idea of promoting existing female directors, as well as wanting to mentor new ones, she created the Petra Joy Awards in 2009, a short film competition for first-time erotic film directors.

Petra continues to make headlines with her autobiographical book The She Pornographer. Female Fantasies: My Revolution Of Lust which was published by Heyne in Germany in June 2012.

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This post, July 26: Petra Joy on Art-Core Films and Sex from a Female Perspective originally appeared on Pucker Up on July 24, 2013. Tweet This Post!

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Anal Advisor: Good Guy

Besides using lots of lube, what else can I do to make anal sex more enjoyable for my girlfriend?

–Good Guy

Great question! I wish every guy put this one on top of his list. The first thing is to do is talk to her and ask her what she likes. She is your best source of information, even better than me, since she knows her body best. She may like a particular position, for example. Or maybe she wants to try out a new toy. Or maybe she wants to have anal sex as part of a roleplaying fantasy. Ask her. Speaking of positions, experiment with different angles to see which ones give you the most indirect G-spot stimulation, since that is one of the ways women get off from anal penetration. And, of course, I recommend clitoral stimulation and lots of it. If you can reach her clit comfortably, have at it, otherwise, she can use her own hand or a vibrator. Working her clit while you fuck her ass will not only enhance her pleasure, it may also make her come.

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This post, Anal Advisor: Good Guy originally appeared on Pucker Up on July 17, 2013. Tweet This Post!

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Bobbi Starr’s Vicarious

Vicarious, a recently released lesbian, POV-themed porno, is a work of pure genius. Director/performer/babe/superhuman Bobbi Starr manages to capture a raw eroticism unlike anything I have ever seen. This isn’t surprising—lesbian POV’s are rare. However, the genius of this film is not solely based on the uniqueness of the genre. Rather, it is about exactly what Bobbi catches on camera—the doe-eyes, clits, and zoomed-in assholes (to name a few)—that makes Vicarious one of the most noteworthy pornos of 2011.

The film is broken down into nine sex scenes, each featuring Bobbi and a performer. These performers represent a diverse range of female-bodied people. There are butches, femmes, dommes, subs, straight gals, queer folks, completely shaved pussies, and fully-grown bushes. Prior to each scene is a short interview where Bobbi asks the performers about their sex lives, desires, and experiences both in and out of the industry. These interviews are interspersed with beautifully shot images of the stars sensually touching their bodies. Something feels incredibly personable about the interviews. Bobbi and the performers talk like lovers or friends, complete with awkward silences and laughter.

This sense of authenticity (and the laughter) continues into the sex. Actually, there is more genuine laughter in Vicarious than there is in most porn flicks. Humor is always a plus in my book, especially when it is incorporated so effortlessly with orgasms. The laughter in this flick is often sparked by the openness and body curiosity of the performers. They dive (quite literally) into one another, exploring the human body with an energy and passion akin to Christopher Columbus playing doctor. At one point, while filming a close-up of Kimberely Kane’s ass, Bobbi exclaims, “this is like National Geographic.” In my opinion, Vicarious is 1000 times hotter because of these moments—and not because I am especially turned on by an-almost medical close-up of an asshole. Rather, it is truthfulness that comes across in these shots that turns me on. It’s unexpected, candid, and honest. In other words, it is voyeurism at it’s finest.

Do not worry if sexy National Geographic is not your style. This film has something for everyone. There are high-heels and Converse, ass-less tighty-whities and corsets, glass butt plugs and giant strap-ons. Plus, there’s always a second camera filming from a distance, thus providing a lovely combination of POV and outside shots. I must say, Bobbi is incredibly talented with a camera. In the final scene Ms. Starr manages to hold the camera in one hand, tilt her head to the side, and film herself eating Aiden Ashley’s pussy. Another amazing shot features Jiz Lee rubbing her buzzed, red Mohawk along Bobbi’s pussy. Who knew a buzz-cut could provide such a buzz? And another features Lexi Bell’s giant eyes looking up from Bobbi’s gaping ass. And another features Rozen Debowe fucking Bobbi with two hands (8 fingers in total). And another features Dylan Ryan lusciously squirting all over a large bed. And another…And another…

I could go on to describe every shot in the three-and-a-half hour film (yup, it’s a long one.) But I recommend you just go out and experience it for yourself. As the tagline reads, Vicarious is “so close you can taste it.” I, for one, am still licking my lips.

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Abby Spector is a recent graduate of Wesleyan University, where she majored in Feminist/Gender/Sexuality Studies. She is currently interning for Tristan, a job that allows her to write about sex, research feminist porn, and play with dogs (among other, equally awesome things). When she isn’t working, Abby enjoys comfortable nudity and salty foods. Her dream? A world where she could sit around naked and eat overly-salted french fries. Her blog is Sexy Awkward Times.

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This post, Bobbi Starr’s Vicarious originally appeared on Pucker Up on July 17, 2013. Tweet This Post!

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July 19: Performers Derrick Pierce and Christian on Kinky Sex, Dominance and Submission, and The Life of a Male Porn Star

This Friday on Sex Out Loud, listen to exclusive clips from Tristan Taormino’s Guide to Kinky Sex for Couples and meet two of the men featured in my newest sex ed movie. I’ll ask Christian about how men can explore their submissive fantasies, why he’s a controversial figure in the adult industry, and what the new porn economy means for performers. Then Derrick Pierce will join me for a discussion about being a thoughtful dominant, what excites him most about his job, and the new film he directed, Tuff Love.

Christian, also know as Christian XXX, is a male porn performer who has appeared in over 2000 scenes since he began work in the adult industry in 2003. He is the winner of four AVN Awards and he is the reigning 2013 Feminist Porn Heartthrob of the Year. He is a controversial figure because he’s done both gay and straight porn. His earliest work was in gay porn under the name Maxx Diesel (he was briefly a contract performer for Falcon Studios). He then began working in the straight porn industry under the name Christian, where, in addition to traditional heterosexual scenes, he does more diverse work than any of his peers including scenes featuring plus-sized co-stars, strap-on anal sex, transsexual women, male submission, and more. He has his own website aptly named ChristianDoesThemAll.com and he blogs at christiansingstheblues.com.

Derrick Pierce is an adult performer, martial arts expert, and a self-described “Crossfit junkie.” He’s appeared in over 100 adult feature films, including Iron Man XXX, Upload, Tristan Taormino’s Guide to Kinky Sex for Couples, and Tuff Love, which he directed for Wicked Pictures. He’s received numerous award nominations, and he won the 2010 AVN Award for Unsung Male Performer of the Year. Follow him on Twitter @DPiercexxx and check out the fan site derrickpiercexxxstar.com.

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This post, July 19: Performers Derrick Pierce and Christian on Kinky Sex, Dominance and Submission, and The Life of a Male Porn Star originally appeared on Pucker Up on July 17, 2013. Tweet This Post!

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Why No One Is Having Normal Sex; plus, Feminist Porn in Cosmo

In June I gave a speech at the Guelph Sexuality Conference. You can read more about my appearance in this article by The Record.

“I’m here to tell you no one is having normal sex,” New York-based sexuality educator and author Tristan Taormino told scores of people attending her frank but well-received plenary speech.

 

And in case you missed it, Cosmo Magazine did an interview online with me about feminist porn! I’m so glad mainstream media is started to hear the buzz of feminist porn. The Feminist Porn Book is about to go into it’s second printing!

I have no interest in policing or judging anyone’s desires, fantasies, and porn preferences, and I know that plenty of women have fantasies of dominance and submission. Images of dominance and submission are not anti-feminist in and of themselves, but one of the reasons feminists critique them is because consent is not always explicit and because of the repetition of men dominating women, making it the main type of power exchange we see in a lot of mainstream pornography. I think there is a stereotype that women want kinder, gentler, more romantic porn; some women do, but not all women. Feminist pornographers don’t want to do away with sexual power dynamics; many of us want to explore them in an explicitly consensual and more diverse, nuanced, non-stereotypical way.

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This post, Why No One Is Having Normal Sex; plus, Feminist Porn in Cosmo originally appeared on Pucker Up on July 17, 2013. Tweet This Post!

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