Annette Mori's Blog, page 45

Let it Snow…Let it Snow…Let it Snow

I moved to the Pacific Northwest thirty years ago having lived almost my whole life in the snowy, chilly, Midwest. I briefly lived in Flagstaff, Arizona which is an elevation of seven thousand so the winters there were equally snowy.

My first year in Seattle, the city had a blizzard-their words not mine-with almost four inches of snow. Aghast…I laughed when the whole city literally shut down. I couldn’t understand what the big flippin’ deal was? Come on people, get out of my way and stop fretting over a light dusting of snow. I’d just moved there from a place that had real snow. To be fair, Seattle was ill-equipped to handle any amount of snow because the city rarely got any.

A year later, I moved to Bellingham which received slightly more snow than Seattle, but it was still the west side of the state where snow levels were relatively low compared to where I came from. Five years later, I moved to Whidbey Island and was faced with the same situation. Anytime we had any amount of snow that stuck to the ground for more than a couple of hours, the locals went nuts and all the schools closed.

 

When I was a kid, I remembered the school closing once, but that was because a water main had frozen and busted – flooding the school. On occasion, the buses would run late, but the attitude in the Midwest was we’re not letting no stinkin’ snow stop us. Kids, get your butts dressed because snow days are a fantasy around here.

Finally, when I moved to the East side of the state almost twelve years ago, I got to experience the kind of snow I was used to as a kid. We got feet. I was home again. Sure there were still some idiots in their big bad trucks littered in the ditch because they were overconfident, but most people knew how to drive in the snow and didn’t panic at the first snowflake.

I’ll admit it, I was smug. I made fun of those Washingtonians who freaked out with the first snowfall. I joined in with the other east siders who made fun of those west siders. I’d put my snow tires on and brazenly managed the the seventy five miles (round trip) each day to work. The conditions would get dicey, but I knew how to handle myself in snow. I grew up with it.

A few years after I moved to snowy Cle Elum, I was driving to work in the freezing rain. The roads looked clear and I was driving a reasonable speed, or so I thought. Suddenly I hit a patch of ice, did a one eighty and traversed backwards into the Yakima River. Fortunately, the rocks stopped me from going all the way into the icy river of death. This was the article reported in the local paper….

I wasn’t cool and collected about my driving prowess anymore. So who did I call as my heart beat loudly in my chest? Nope, not 911, that’s far too logical. I called my wife. Here’s how that conversation went (sorta it’s been a few years):

Me: I’m in the Yakima River. I don’t know what to do.

My Wife: Roll down the window. Can you get out?

Me: Yeah (vibrato voice).

My Wife: You’ll be okay. Did you call 911 yet?

Me: No, I called you first (awkward pause as I realized how stupid I sounded). I guess I should let work know I’m going to be late. The rocks look slippery. Oh here comes a guy. I think he’s going to help me.

My Wife: Okay call me back when you get to work.

Me: I will.

I called work right afterwards and the little stinkers kept the voice mail that I left which was something like, “I’m going to be late, I ended up in the Yakima River.” After they knew I was okay, they laughed about it for weeks. I was never late and had a reputation as a very unflappable person. The tremor in my voice when I left the message told the story. Yep, she can be rattled. I made the local paper. Here’s the blurb. I was the, “and one car was off the roadway and in the Yakima River.”

Since then, I don’t drive in the snow unless I have to and then I creep along at twenty miles an hour. It drives my wife nuts. She won’t let me drive because we’d never get anywhere in the snow if I did. I grab the, oh crap bar, every other second while she handles the snow like a pro. She commutes across the pass every day, so she should be a pro by now, but can you blame me for being nervous all the time?

I still love the snow, but now I have a very healthy respect for Mother Nature. When I retire, I think I’ll just get around in a snowmobile or cross country skis. Who needs to get anywhere within a specific timeframe anyway?

So if you ever find yourself making fun of people who freak out over snow, just remember that Karma has a way of always hitting when you least expect it. Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.

Tonight I managed to get home by sneaking through the cones at the exit 37 miles from my house on I-90. They like to close the highway when the pass closes for any significant length of time. It’s been closed since yesterday and won’t be open for an indeterminate time. I’m not moving from the fireplace room unless I slap on some skis.

We’ve been lamenting over the last two years about the lack of snow at our place in Cle Elum. Be careful what you ask for, because you just might get it. We now have four feet of snow! Here is my wife and I last weekend.

If anyone is snowed in right now and wants a good book to read by the fireplace, feel free to check one of mine out. You can access all the books by clicking on the two sites below. Have a safe and happy holiday!

Affinity Author Page         Amazon Author Page

OCD is Alive and Well…

Most people know I’ve been struggling with menopause for ten years now….yes ten friggin years. Here’s what that looks like for me: 1) I rarely if ever sleep through the night; 2) Sweat pours down my body on a regular basis, with alternate complaints of “I’m freezing”; and 3) I crave and must have sweets. Okay maybe I made the last one up because I want to give a clinical reason for my addiction to sugar.

Fortunately, what has not occurred with menopause is irritability. At least I don’t think it has. I suppose you might have to ask my wife about that.

What does this have to do with OCD, or for those of you not familiar with that term, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder? Waking up eight times a night has beautifully fed my OCD.

Here’s what it looks like…

I crack open my eyes and  turn over to look at my iPad a minimum of eight times a night. Sometimes I check my e-mail, sometimes I read Facebook messages and respond, and I always check the rank for my latest book.

My wife wakes up and says, “What are you doing?”

I don’t usually fess up, even though she knows, so I mumble, “Nothing, checking the time.”

Wise to my disorder, my wife says, “Stop obsessing over the Amazon rank and go to sleep.”

Since I only get to see my wife on the weekends, my disorder is tempered. On the weekdays, it is allowed to run free and naked through the forest. The other thing I check is the reviews and I read every single one. I can’t help myself. Fortunately people have been very kind on Amazon.

When I was younger I used to obsess over different things, namely the cleanliness of the carpets. At parties that we hosted at our house, it was not uncommon for me to follow people around with my little green carpet machine. On occasion, I would bring out the industrial strength steam cleaner right in the middle of the Partridge Family singing, I think I Love You.

The whole Rugby Team loved doing a parody to that song changing the words to:

I was sleeping and right in the middle of a good dream

Like all at once I wake up from something that keeps knocking at my brain

Before I go insane I hold my pillow to my head

And spring up in my bed screaming out the words I dread

I think I f&*$ed you (I think I f&*$ed you)

The Rugby team and our antics is a whole new blog topic to explore at a later date.

My wife said to me the other day, “Why aren’t you concerned anymore over the cleanliness of the condo or our house. That was an obsession I appreciated.”

I laughed and told her, “I’m on to bigger and better obsessions now.”

I’ve often blogged about how wonderful my wife is because she truly does take care of me. She is usually the one who ends up cleaning my little pigsty when she comes to our Moses Lake condo. I joke about wanting her to retire early because I need a housewife. She is not amused by that.

I just submitted a manuscript to my publisher about a person who snoops and is right on the borderline of a true person with Obsessive Compulsive disorder. I based it a bit on myself and my mother (who was OCD to the extreme) with a fair amount of embellishment.  I hope it gets published because it will let you glimpse just a little of what that might be like for someone who has those tendencies.

Germaphobes Anonymous.

Here’s a little teaser for you.

Juliet pushed the door open to a grinning Tanner. She was careful not to touch the door handle and used her shirt again. “Did the housekeeper take a vacation or something? It’s disgusting in there.”

“For someone who was tied to a chair with a gun against her forehead, you sure have a smart mouth. Didn’t anyone ever tell you that you don’t have to express every little thought that pops into your head,” Tanner warned.

“Trust me. I’ve kept a whole slew of thoughts to myself. This is the restrained version,” Juliet quipped.

“Hmmm. Good to know. I recommend you working on your tact just a smidge more.” Tanner held out her thumb and forefinger to demonstrate.

“Fine, but if you expect to keep me alive, I need cleaning supplies to rid this cabin of whatever harmful germs have been allowed to flourish without intervention.”

“I didn’t exactly have time to make it presentable for company and just for the record, I don’t normally live this way. This was a last minute decision. Come on let’s eat.”

Juliet looked at the old oak table and sighed. Although it didn’t have any obvious remnants of moldy food or other repulsive items, she was distrustful.

“Stop eyeing the table like it’s your enemy. The food is in a bag, wrapped tightly. Germs aren’t skilled enough to burrow inside two layers of protection. God, I’ve kidnapped a germophobe,” Tanner complained.

“I’ll just take the sandwich right from the bag. No need to get out any plates or put it on the table.” Juliet scrunched up her face.

Tanner rolled her eyes and pulled out the bulging sandwich wrapped in white paper.

Previous blogs have all the links to all my books, but if you are interested here is a link to my Amazon Author’s page and the Affinity Author’s Page.  Thanks for your support!

Affinity Author Page         Amazon Author Page

 

 

I’m Such a Tease…But It’s An Addiction

When I signed a contract for my debut book, I didn’t realize how much interaction was required on Facebook and other avenues. I learned how social media plays such an essential role in marketing a new author.

Affinity encouraged me to write a free short story – I wrote several. Two were immediately posted on the Affinity site and the others were held back since they were follow-up stories to my debut, Love Forever, Live Forever. This was my first taste of the tease.

Since those first few months of establishing a Facebook page, writing blogs, and participating in author grills and spotlights, I found a perverse pleasure with putting out these little teasers. I got the idea from fellow author JL Gaynor. She posted a blurb on her current work in progress and I was hooked. I promptly looked her up and bought the first book in the series. I’ve been a fan ever since.

I joined every lesbian readers and writers group I could find and discovered a side benefit – I was introduced to many new authors and a wider variety of wonderful books.

One group that I joined became my fun group and to this day I keep that group separate from the other reading and writing groups. Sure they know I’m a part-time lesbian fiction writer, but I stay completely away from any marketing. I’ve learned a few surprising tidbits from this group.  See the TMI blog on the pineapple experiment.

One of the most recent learnings from this group is a term called edging. I had to ask what that was. I know stop laughing for all of you out there that are familiar with this term. It got me to thinking that this is exactly what I do with all my teasers. I get people all riled up and then make them wait for the big reveal. About a week before Locked Inside came out, I started posting little teasers. It was so much fun to do this. Now I’ve already started posting teasers of a draft called Juliet the Spy that I’m not even sure will get published.

I think I need help because I’ve developed a wicked desire to send out teasers for everything. It’s a brand new addiction.

I haven’t stopped at posted teasers. Instead I’ve graduated to recorded audio teasers. Next thing you know I’ll be videotaping me acting out the scenes in my books. Do I have any volunteers who want to help?

It’s not my fault that I’ve developed this addiction because several of my Facebook friends and readers keep urging me on – dang enablers, the whole lot of you.

So…ahhhhh….here’s a teaser for Locked Inside…

Fall of 2008

Awareness came slowly to me as the blanket of fog that smothered all signs of intelligence rolled back. I imagined an intricate spider web in my head tangled with fine silk strands as Wonder Woman slices through them like an adventurer hacking through a jungle.

I was still confused about where I was when I heard giggling. At first, I thought my sisters were invading my sacred space.

“Shhh, come in here and tell me every little detail,” a girl’s voice said.

“I don’t think we should be in here, Tammie. We’re supposed to be doing our volunteer hours, not screwing around in a resident’s room,” a different voice huffed.

I opened my eyes and a fuzzy picture began to emerge. Two strange teenage girls were huddled in the corner of a foreign room with sterile white walls. I wasn’t in my bedroom at home and I began to panic.

It’s probably hard for people to truly appreciate the terror that I experienced at this particular moment in my life. I had no idea where I was, who these strangers were, or what had happened to me. I would later discover that I’d forfeited six years of my life while hovering in a semi-comatose state. They never did figure out the origin of the illness or why I went into a coma and by the time I showed any awareness six years had passed and my family had accepted the original prognosis that I would never recover.

The tall skinny one with red hair shrugged, “Don’t be such a tight ass, Carly.” She pointed in my direction and giggled. “She’ll never tell.”

“That’s just mean.”

“What? She’s a vegetable, but right now she’s kinda creeping me out. Look, her eyes are open and it’s almost like she’s listening to every word we say,” the redhead blurted out.

The other one looked at me and frowned. “I think we’re upsetting her. She’s breathing really heavy now and I think she can hear us. Something is wrong. She looks terrified.”

I was trying to move my head, my arms, my legs, anything, but none of my body parts would cooperate with me. I felt my breathing quicken and I desperately wanted to communicate with them. I wanted to know where I was and why I couldn’t talk or move.

“She does look kind of agitated, Carly. Maybe we should get your mom.”

They left the room and I tried to move my head. I managed to move a couple of inches as I took in my surroundings. I was able to shift my eyes from side to side as I noticed a TV mounted high on the wall in the center of the room and a single bed with a simple nightstand on my right. It looked like a typical hospital room, but I wasn’t positive. In my mind, I was still ten years old and my parents were nowhere to be found. I wanted my mom. I wanted reassurance that everything would be okay.

I heard the click click click of heels on the linoleum floor and watched as an attractive dark haired woman entered the room. She had a stethoscope draped around her neck and one of the teenagers followed her into the room. They had similar features and I wondered if she was the mom the redhead referred to earlier.

“I’m sorry, Mom, Tammie dragged me in here. I didn’t mean to upset her and she looked like she was trying to say something. Her breathing got kinda fast like she was having a panic attack or something,” the young woman confessed.

Well that answered that mystery for me. The young woman must have been the one the redhead, Tammie, called Carly. As each minute passed, I was becoming more aware of my surroundings and remembering little details like the names of the young girls.

“Carly, it’s not like you to get sucked into Tammie’s harebrained ideas. I taught you better than that. Belinda is a very special case, but I don’t think she actually heard you or that you upset her in any way. She’s been completely unresponsive for nearly six years. Unfortunately her illness caused severe brain damage.”

“I know she reacted to something,” Carly insisted.

“Okay, let me check her out.”

The woman grabbed her stethoscope and I felt her hands push aside my clothing as she placed the cold silver end on my chest. Her hands were gentle, but the stethoscope was cold and I must have had some small reaction—although it didn’t feel like any part of my body would obey.

“I’m sorry, Belinda, did you feel that?” she asked.

Carly stepped up to the bedside and I could feel her touch my hand.

I looked down at my curled up hand, which resembled some kind of deformed claw.

“My mom’s a doctor, she won’t hurt you,” Carly soothed.

Since I wasn’t able to move any part of my body but my eyes and my head in incremental movements, I concentrated all my energy on letting them know there was someone locked inside this useless body. I wasn’t a vegetable.

“Hmmm, in all the years I’ve looked in on Belinda, she’s never reacted like this. She does respond to certain stimuli. We’ve always been able to feed her as long as someone touches her lips first. This is new, though. Her heart rate does appear to be elevated and there is definite movement in her eyes. Perhaps she is reacting to your voice.”

Yes. It was a start. I had to find a way to communicate and let them know I was aware and present.

Ooohh I feel so much better now that I got that teaser out.  Anyone interested in finding out what happens, feel free to get the book!

Links to Locked Inside:        Amazon      Affinity         Barnes and Noble    Smashwords

Audio Teaser Locked Inside

Locked Inside

Link to Out of This World:  Amazon

 Out of This World Audio Teaser

Links to Asset Management: Amazon         Affinity E-Book Press      Smashwords     Barnes & Noble     Bella Books

Asset Management Audio Teaser

Links to Love Forever, Live Forever:

Amazon              Affinity E-Book Press         Smashwords        Barnes and Noble     Bella Books

Love Forever, Live Forever Audio Teaser

 

 

 

The 80’s Called They Want Their Suit Back…

This week I am going to poke fun at myself again, because it is one of my favorite pastimes. I am a fashion don’t in every way because clothes and staying in vogue is simply unimportant to me. When our organization began to look again at our dress code policy, I wanted less than nothing to do with it.

Unfortunately, I am the HR Executive for the organization, so the policy resides in my department. I wisely suggested that one of my staff sit on the committee to review the policy. That I believe was one of the wisest decisions of my career.

Three policies in a workplace tend to stir up the employees: parking, dress code and who makes the coffee (actually this one doesn’t come into play anymore now that women have broken the glass ceiling). We’ve already obliterated the hornet’s nest when we changed the parking policy and, aghast, made our employees walk a few extra feet (okay I’m minimizing a bit) because patients and visitors had no place to park. You’d think that we were the worst employer on the planet because we wanted our patients to have a close place to park. Now here we are again, wanting to eliminate the long standing tradition of allowing employees to wear jeans on Wednesdays and Fridays. On Wednesdays employees can pay a fee for the privilege of dressing casually and all the money goes to charity. I know such a horrible policy, how dare we allow employees to pay into a fund for cancer research.

Since I have a bit of a different philosophy on dress codes by believing we need to focus on far more important issues (like how we treat each other and the patients and families members) versus whether our reputation is tarnished because we allow employees to wear jeans, I declined involvement in the committee. Things like measuring the length of a skirt, leggings or no leggings, open toed shoes, which employees should be required to tie back their hair have all been hot topics in the meeting. I decided to test a theory. What if I started pulling out my conservative suits from the 80s and began wearing them to work, would the committee want to also address out of style dress because that might tarnish the reputation of the organization?

I already have a problem wearing the right shoes (see earlier blog Two Left Feet), and for some reason on this particular day I wore the wrong color tights (navy instead of black). It’s cold here so I’m not wearing nylons when tights are a lot warmer. I wonder if they will forbid tights as well.

I think my staff knew I was poking fun when they saw the shoulder pads and since I’ve never worn dresses prior to this dress code controversy, it was pretty apparent. I beat them to the punch in the morning and told them I’d already received a call from the 80s declaring they wanted their suit back.

Maybe I’ll bring back vintage fashion or maybe other people will see things for the way they really are – let’s spend more time on the things that really matter and less time on who is wearing what. That’s not to say we should allow people to wear any old thing, but come on there is a level of reasonableness – isn’t there?

Who’s with me? Bring back parachute pants (I owned a pair and wore them regularly), big hair, headbands (Olivia rocked that) and jumpsuits cause don’t we all deserve to laugh at least once a day?

I hear that a few of my books have some laugh out loud moments, so feel free to check them out and get a chuckle.

As a special treat I’ve also added audio teasers to the currently published books.

My first two books, Love Forever, Live Forever, and Asset Management are available in both e-book and print format. Links below will get you to all the places you can purchase the books.  Out of This World is only available through Amazon and is FREE to Kindle Unlimited subscribers. Locked Inside was just released and links to all the different places you care get this new book are below. Thanks for supporting a new writer!! 

Links to Locked Inside: Amazon      Affinity         Barnes and Noble    Smashwords

Audio Teaser Locked Inside

Locked Inside

  Link to Out of This World:  Amazon

 Out of This World Audio Teaser

Links to Asset Management: Amazon         Affinity E-Book Press      Smashwords     Barnes & Noble     Bella Books

Asset Management Audio Teaser

Links to Love Forever, Live Forever:

Amazon              Affinity E-Book Press         Smashwords        Barnes and Noble     Bella Books

Love Forever, Live Forever Audio Teaser

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tofurky Anyone?

As I was pondering what to talk about for this week’s blog, I put the question out to my Facebook friends who provided many wonderful ideas. After a bit of internal debate, I decided to take the Tofurky suggestion since we are so close to Thanksgiving.

First, I want to provide complete transparency and say I am not a vegetarian or a vegan, but have a close friend who is and has served the infamous Tofurky for Thanksgiving. I am also not a meat eater. I fall somewhere in between.

So what is somewhere in between? Well…I don’t eat beef or pork or any animal that I deem cute. That usually includes animals with fur. My friends and colleagues call me a cuteatarian. It’s a made up word, so don’t bother to look it up. I should probably copyright it because I’ll bet there are plenty of people who share my preferences.

I am not one of those rabid individuals who insist that you don’t eat those cute animals in front of me, because if I did I’d never go out to dinner with my carnivorous wife. I also have to confess to eating rib roast once a year because it’s our Christmas tradition. I just say, “La la la la, I’m not really eating that cute cow with the big brown eyes”.

I’ll bet you’re wondering how I managed to go down that slippery slope. Okay maybe you’re not, but I’m going to tell you anyway.

My mother, who has since passed away, was Italian. For Thanksgiving and Christmas she would prepare food the Italian way, which always included Lasagna made with beef in addition to a huge Turkey with all the dressings. Well… there was no way in hell I would offend my Italian mother by refusing to eat her Lasagna made with loving care (especially since it was my favorite food growing up). Thus, the tradition of, “La la la la, I’m not really eating that cute cow with the big brown eyes,” was born.

So what does all of this have to do with Tofurkey?  I know this is a bit of a stretch, but for those who turn up their noses at Tofurkey, like me, I want to advocate for a non-judgmental Thanksgiving. Personally, I hate the notion of eating soy bean for Thanksgiving and no amount of insistence that it has the same consistency of a real Turkey will sway me. I feel the same about tofu dogs. Not going to happen. I will never believe they taste just like real hot dogs or chicken hot dogs. Ironically, my wife, the carnivore, loves Tofu. However, this does not mean that we should pass judgement on those who insist this is the right choice for them. Can’t we all just get along?

Today I helped with our annual Turkey Food drive. I took one for the team and wore the ridiculous Turkey costume, parading around the Safeway, collecting food and smiles from everyone as I moved the food to the truck to deliver to the local food bank. Of all the donated food items including several frozen Turkeys, there was not one Tofurky. It got me wondering about those vegetarian families in need. Would they be forced to become carnivores? We are a biased society after all….

Now my openness to Tofurkey as a legitimate food for Thanksgiving stops when that is the only option. I mean, really, you can’t expect me to be happy about that as the only option. So my answer to this dilemma is to make sure you have something for everyone. Let’s celebrate the Italian tradition of way too much food in every possible category that you’ll end up eating until it rots in the refrigerator. Happy Thanksgiving everyone. If you find you have some down time while preparing your Tofurkey roast, well then feel free to download one of my books. LOL.

As a special treat I’ve also added audio teasers to the currently published books.

My first two books, Love Forever, Live Forever, and Asset Management are available in both e-book and print format. Links below will get you to all the places you can purchase the books.  Out of This World is only available through Amazon and is FREE to Kindle Unlimited subscribers. Thanks for supporting a new writer!!  Coming soon is Locked Inside.

Locked Inside

  Link to Out of This World:  Amazon

 Out of This World Audio Teaser

Links to Love Forever, Live Forever:

 

Amazon              Affinity E-Book Press         Smashwords        Barnes and Noble     Bella Books

Love Forever, Live Forever Audio Teaser

 

Amazon         Affinity E-Book Press      Smashwords     Barnes & Noble     Bella Books

Asset Management Audio Teaser

Crossing The Generations

Last night I posted my thoughts on Facebook’s version of a hello-the infamous Poke. In my normal way of looking at things I poked (pun intended) a little fun at this contemporary form of greeting. My intent was to let people know that I’m really not a b@#%& when I don’t poke back, but instead I prefer the “old fashioned” way of greeting people. As I just wrote that, I started laughing to myself because there is really nothing old fashioned about private messaging people on Facebook, or even sending a hello e-mail.

As I looked at the comments from my post, I noticed there were some generational differences. Of course, someone just had to pick up on the terminology and add a sexual innuendo. Come on…how could we resist with the terminology “poke”. It was just begging for the conversation to turn. It provided several laugh out loud moments for me. In my defense, I was not the one who went there first. I just added my LMAO comment. I am so proud of myself that I finally know what LMAO means. If there are still people in the dark on this, it means, laughing my ass off. However I was not so hip to know what ROTFLMAO means and recently had to do a Google search to learn that texting/Facebook shortcut.

 

I’ll bet you are wondering where the heck I am going with all this, especially since this is titled Crossing the Generations. Stay with me Facebook peeps….I’ll get there.

As I pondered this further, I realized that most of the people in my age group are not only emerging into the Facebook craze, but jumping in with both feet. Like a fine wine we are taking a sip, swirling it around in our mouth and tasting its fine flavors. My wife and I are in a generation that can claim we have considerable life experiences due to our many years on the planet, and we have both not only embraced Facebook, but I might venture to admit we are slightly addicted to it now.

Admittedly, I did not enter the Facebook craze willingly. I came kicking and screaming all the way. Prior to my mother’s passing, I learned she had a Facebook page to keep in contact with her grandchildren. I simply couldn’t let my 70 year old mother show me up. If she could do it, so could I.

I confess that it wasn’t until I started writing that I became truly active and ultimately, completely addicted. Now I come home each night and try to do my one thousand words of writing before I check my Facebook page and the many notifications just waiting my response. I use Facebook as an incentive now. After I complete my writing goal, I jump onto Facebook. I am still learning all the lingo of this new generation of electronic communication. I am still far from adept at using social media, because Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest and Google might as well exist on a different planet. However, I thought I had crossed the generational divide, until this whole poking thing threw me for a loop. Sorry I just can’t bring myself to poke you back. So if you want to say hello to me you’re going to have to do it the revised old fashioned way-through a private message or e-mail: annettemori0859@gmail.com. No poking the old lady-ROTFLMAO.

There are many other things that I would love you to do as a replacement to a poke. I welcome a pm or an e-mail with feedback on any of my books. Of course I’d love anyone to review my books and to be able to pm me, e-mail me, or review a book, you first have to have read them…..

 My first two books, Love Forever, Live Forever, and Asset Management are available in both e-book and print format. Links below will get you to all the places you can purchase the books.  Out of This World is only available through Amazon and is FREE to Kindle Unlimited subscribers. Thanks for supporting a new writer!!  Coming soon is and Locked Inside.

Locked Inside

  Link to Out of This World:  Amazon

Links to Love Forever, Live Forever:

Amazon              Affinity E-Book Press         Smashwords        Barnes and Noble     Bella Books

 

Amazon         Affinity E-Book Press      Smashwords     Barnes & Noble     Bella Books

TMI…

Too much information – that is the topic this week.

I suppose I’m at that stage in my life where I can get away with saying and doing most anything because I generally don’t care what people think. I can’t wait to join the red hat society. Let me qualify that by saying, I can do and say anything outside of the confines of work where being a role model and saying inappropriate things just doesn’t fly as the Chief Human Resource Officer.

This past weekend I was honored to be part of The Writing Block and I assured everyone that I would answer every question openly and honestly. I did. My wife, who is far more reserved about revealing any intimate parts of her life, was reticent about what I might share. I assured her that the questions would not be about our intimate life, maybe a bit about us as a backstory, but nothing too revealing. She remained skeptical, but let me do my thing. This coming weekend, I am On The Grill in the Lesbian Book Readers Club group and I’m thrilled. Why? I’ll get to that.

I am a total introvert in person, but behind the computer, I think I must be a closet exhibitionist. Nothing is off the table and I don’t think I possess a filter. I believe I confessed to being so OCD that I was answering a question while half dressed and changing into my work out gear. Sometimes, that gets me in trouble with my wife and I have to remember to be an open book about myself without dragging her into the melee. We’ve been together for eleven years now and I’ll bet there are a plethora of fascinating tidbits left to learn about her, while she has to be satisfied with the left over scraps I’ve forgotten to reveal about myself.

I am not sure if I have always been this way or if this is a new found freedom that I’ve found as a writer. They say you should write what you know, so if a writer filters everything, won’t their words be extremely boring? Isn’t it the odd and off the wall that tends to get noticed?

We live in a world now that overwhelms us with Facebook messages that even I think dances along the edges of the too much information rule. I’m amazed at what people share.

I feel fortunate to be included in a closed group with a bunch of really wonderful women who share my propensity to tell all. Not only is this a very freeing experience, I’ve learned a lot. Recently I learned that if you eat pineapple, your uh, shall we say, nether regions will taste like pineapple.  Who knew? I definitely have to test that out. See too much information. Or…did you learn something new too?

Even though I’m a bit more mature than many other writers out there, I’ve had limited experiences in certain areas and I have to do a lot of research because I’ve chosen not to be a fade to black writer. Boy have I learned a lot and you should see the type of spam I get now. I’m sure I’m on some list somewhere based on the types of searches I do. Not only do I search material for my love scenes, but I search ways to kill people, types of guns the Russian Mafia uses, and some other very unconventional topics.

I used to work with a group of women who also had no filter and you should have heard the lunch conversations we would have. The older we get, the more we talk about our various bodily functions. Now it’s all over Facebook. Colonoscopy, loose stools, irritable bowel syndrome, constipation, gag reflex, bladder control – those are just a few of the lunch topics. Nothing is sacrosanct anymore.

The reality is that as writers we almost have to be comfortable about revealing ourselves, because regardless of the genre we choose, there is a little bit of our lives and our experiences peppered throughout our works. I can honestly say that bits and pieces of my life, including my friends and family, are woven within my stories. However, at what point do we provide too much information and hurt those around us. I wonder a bit about whether my father recognizes himself in a few of my books. It hasn’t been a compliment to him. I think at one point I described him as a pig, as in typical male who is okay with lesbians, but not gay men.

So in this world of Facebook, selfies, and social media, I fit right in because I border on TMI. I’ve got nothing to hide anymore, that’s all been revealed in my books. Anyone who knows anything about me can see bits and pieces of me in the various characters in my books and especially the character, Mabel, in Out of This World.

Want to know more about me, join the grill this weekend or pick up one of my books!

My first two books, Love Forever, Live Forever, and Asset Management are available in both e-book and print format. Links below will get you to all the places you can purchase the books.  Out of This World is only available through Amazon and is FREE to Kindle Unlimited subscribers. Thanks for supporting a new writer!!  Coming soon is and Locked Inside.

  Link to Out of This World:  Amazon

Links to Love Forever, Live Forever:

Amazon              Affinity E-Book Press         Smashwords        Barnes and Noble     Bella Books

 

Amazon         Affinity E-Book Press      Smashwords     Barnes & Noble     Bella Books

We Are Family…..

I joke around a lot, especially in that nerdy, socially awkward way that introverted writers tend to gravitate to – well maybe not all introverted writers…. In this respect I resemble the main character, Mabel in my new book, Out of This World. However, when I post that I was dancing or singing in my condo, I’m not lying.

I don’t sing well and my dancing probably looks like The Elaine Dance on Seinfeld, but when I’m happy I just got to let it out. Yesterday, I thought of the tune from the song, We Are Family from Sister Sledge and it stuck in my head. Why? Well let me share that with you.

Sometimes people rant about all the lesbian drama on Facebook and the toxic way that some individuals tend to communicate on occasion, but that has not been my experience. Yesterday, I got a text, an e-mail and then several Facebook comments that were all very supportive about the fact that my latest book was doing well. Miraculously it hit #10 and for me that was nothing short of spectacular. I’m not a well known writer at all. In fact, I barely make a dent in the known category. This does not stop so many really wonderful women from posting on my timeline, texting me, sending me private messages, or e-mailing me. Other writers have also reached out selflessly to help me promote my books and offer encouraging words. I want to list a few of those individuals who because I truly am blessed: Gail, Ali, Lacey, Diana, Renee, Jen, Anya, Sharlie, Marguerite, Sue, Mel, Nancy, Julie, Charlene, DK, Teri, Robin, Kat, Katie, Dawn, Rosie, KA, Angela,  Jove, RG, Andi, K’Anne, Lynne, Tara, Cd, Liz, Victoria, Charlotte, Betsy, Loek and there are so many more I know I am missing.

I’ve also seen the outpouring of love to Sandra Moran and I wished I’d had the courage to introduce myself at the GCLS conference because I know she would have been gracious. I click like on the posts every time I read them, even though I don’t know what to say to send my own post, besides what everyone else is saying – Fuck Cancer.

So because I am going to be featured on the Writer’s Block this weekend, I will take the lazy way out and fill the rest of the blog with a teaser from Out of This World. Everyone will have plenty of opportunities to ask me anything and because I have no filter, I’ll answer every single question with brutal honesty. Now for the teaser….

“Hey, Mabs. Whatcha reading?” Sydney leaned her long lanky body on the counter and gifted me with one of her slow sexy grins.

“Oh, hello Sydney.” I quickly stuffed the book under the counter and away from her piercing blue eyes.

“Syd, all my friends call me Syd, how many times do I have to tell you that? You must be reading that book, Fifty Shades of Grey. I didn’t think you had it in you.” Sydney winked.

I’d been in love with Sydney since the fifth grade, but I was so far into the closet that even the Jaws of Life weren’t able to pry me out.

I blushed at her teasing. “Um, no, it’s not that book.” I sat up and tried for my professional librarian look. “Can I help you find something, Sydney?”

She sighed. “I’m never going to convince you to call me Syd, am I?”

I shook my head. “You’ll always be Sydney to me.” I wanted to add, Sydney, my hero and divine object of hidden desires, but I didn’t.

“Hollie wanted me to pick up that new lesbian romance by Janet River. Do you have it yet?” she asked.

I did have it. That was the book I’d just hidden under the counter but I couldn’t tell her that. “We do, but someone just checked it out.”

“Damn, I didn’t think there were that many lesbians in our sleepy little town. Who checked it out? Maybe I can ask how long she’ll have it and I can get it when she brings it back.”

Busted. I thought of something quick and only felt slightly guilty for the lie. “Oh I’ll just call you when it comes back in. You know, confidentiality and all that.”

“Oh, sorry. Someone in the closet, huh? I just don’t get it. Be out and proud. It’s not like it’s the fifties or anything. No one’s ever bothered me.”

Sydney was one of the beautiful people, popular, confident, and unfortunately, definitely spoken for, not that I would ever have a chance with her. Coming out was a non-issue for her. She just acted as if it was the most normal thing in the world to be a lesbian and it worked. No one ever challenged her. The fact that she began dating the head cheerleader, who happened to be the most sought after girl in high school, certainly didn’t hurt. They were the golden couple. I thought she could do better because Hollie wasn’t a very nice person, but maybe that was just wishful thinking on my part. I fantasized that one day she would realize she was really in love with me.

“That’s because you’re beautiful and everyone loves you. It isn’t like that for everyone,” I blurted out. If ever there was a time I wanted to be born a deaf mute, it was that moment.

Sydney quirked her eyebrow at me. “Are you flirting with me, Mabel Butt?”

Fortunately, at just that moment, the door to the library opened and the tinkling of the bell interrupted our conversation. I looked up and saw the most astonishing woman I’d ever seen in my entire life. I was speechless and I could tell Sydney was too. The woman had the kind of ethereal beauty that you almost never come across. Little did I know how accurate a description that really was. I wasn’t aware at the time, but this moment would be the spark that changed my life forever.

Right now it is available for free if you have Kindle Unlimited and here is the link:  Amazon

Just because this is the most recent book I have out, I hope you don’t just bypass the others….

A link to the first chapter of Asset Management: First Chapter of Asset Management,.  My first novel, Love Forever, Live Forever, is available in both e-book and print format. Links below will get you to all the places you can purchase the book.   Keep scrolling down for the links to Asset Management and Love, Forever Live Forever. Thanks for supporting a new writer!!  Coming soon is and Locked Inside.

Amazon              Affinity E-Book Press         Smashwords        Barnes and Noble     Bella Books

Here are the links to Asset Management:

Amazon         Affinity E-Book Press      Smashwords     Barnes & Noble     Bella Books

Life’s Too Short

Normally I write more light hearted blogs that focus on poking fun at something or someone (typically me). I serve up a main entre’ of revelations about me or my family’s oddities with a side of tongue in cheek humor. On occasion people believe I’m being serious, but I rarely am. The only other blog I’ve written with the reverance it deserved was an Ode To My Mother. However today’s blog is serious.

Over the past several weeks tradgedy has struck all around me. First, my collegue died of cancer at age 52 after a long and valiant battle. Not even a week later, my wife called with the shocking news that our previous next door neighbor got sick, was diagnosed with cancer, and died three days later. Their whole family attended our wedding and his son participated in the ceremony. We had a very small gathering of only 25 people, so the fact that this family was invited meant they were among the select few we chose to invite.

This week I learned of a few more individuals struggling with life threatening illnesses. I haven’t really had the pleasure to get to know the author that everyone is talking about on Facebook because I’ve been far too shy to get to get to know those famous lesbian authors, but I had to completely agree with the FUCK CANCER posts on Facebook.

My wife was so distraught by the news of our former neighbor that she finally agreed it might be time to consider selling our house and retiring a few years earlier than our original plans call for. Currently we live over 100 miles apart from one another because we commute in different directions and it would have been too long for me to commute to my new place of employment. She’s grown very tired of living apart during the week, and I have to admit it isn’t ideal. We’ve made it work so far, but it does suck to only see one another on the weekends.

We are the typical middle aged lesbian couple. In other words, we have a lot of shit that we’ve accumulated over the years. We haven’t touched half of it since we moved in eight years ago. I keep asking myself why we need a 2600 square foot house on three acreas and 1000 square foot condo for only two people. In my humble opinion it is way too much to take care of and manage. I’ve been advocating for selling the house and having my wife retire a few years earlier than our original plans. I honestly believe I could live in a 24 foot motor home and free myself of all that stuff. My wife has been a little hesitant about that plan-especially with five cats (recall Crazy Cat Lady blog).

Now that I am writing almost every evening and have to force myself to stay away from the computer on the weekends, early retirement and traveling around in a motor home sounds pretty good to me. My wife can drive while I write. I’d say the plan was perfect. We get to spend time together. We aren’t weighed done with useless stuff. Finally, we get to travel in our pseudo golden years. I’ll admit that it seems a little early for me to retire at 56 or even in a couple of years after we sell the house at 58, but given that my grandfather died at 69, my mother at 72, I want at least 10 years to travel and have fun with my wife because as I’ve been reminded repeatedly over the last couple of weeks – life’s too short.

I suppose the good news about retiring early is that I get to write more, which I’ve discovered is either a passion or an addiction. I guess it depends on your perspective – I prefer the term passion, but my wife may consider it an addiction. Just remember that when you buy my books you are either feeding a passion or enabling an addiction. No wait that doesn’t sound good…let’s go with feeding a passion!

A link to the first chapter of Asset Management: First Chapter of Asset Management,.  My first novel, Love Forever, Live Forever, is available in both e-book and print format. Links below will get you to all the places you can purchase the book.   Keep scrolling down for the links to Asset Management and Love, Forever Live Forever. Thanks for supporting a new writer!!  Coming soon is my two new books, Out of This World and Locked Inside. Soon I will reveal the rocking covers on both.

Amazon              Affinity E-Book Press         Smashwords        Barnes and Noble     Bella Books

Here are the links to Asset Management:

Amazon         Affinity E-Book Press      Smashwords     Barnes & Noble     Bella Books

Is Hoarding Genetic?

   

I suppose genetics plays a role in a number of things, particularly medical conditions, but I wonder does genetics play a role in character traits? My grandmother was the quintessential hoarder, but I give her a bit of grace because she did grow up in the depression. I am not sure what my father’s excuse is. I’ve blogged before about being my father’s daughter and now I have to wonder if I also have the genetic propensity for hoarding. If hoarding is genetic, I’m doomed.

It’s ironic that my father, who always made fun of my grandmother, now displays equally impressive tendencies toward hoarding. The last time my brother-in-law went to visit, he was appalled at the lack of open space in my father’s house. When my mother was alive, she tended to keep my dad in check. Now that she has passed away-all bets are off.

My father claims that he is getting all the oil paintings, porcelain statues and whatever crap he buys on e-bay at amazing prices. He insists that when he passes away, we will make a fortune on all of his great buys. The night before I got married, he handed out these plastic backed cameos to all of his girls because he remembered how much my two sisters liked them.  He was so proud of himself because of course he got them for a steal. I looked at my older sister and it took all of our willpower not to burst out in laughter. We pocketed the priceless jewelry and said thanks. Of course it never mattered that cameos were never something I gravitated to and they’d gone out of style in the seventies.

I got married when it was legal in 2013.

At least now my father realizes that his paintings and other crap are not really going to allow him to make a killing on e-bay. He has no room in the house anymore, so his answer to this new dilemma is the purchase of watches. Watches take up less room than the other items. Thank God for small miracles.

I used to be the type of person who preferred sparse decorations. Knick knacks were my grandmother’s thing and I hated them. In my humble opinion all they ever did was collect dust and cause more housework. For some inane reason, I’ve selected partners who do not share my need to have the counters, desks, tables, etc. free from clutter. As I get older, it just isn’t important anymore, so I allow for the drift in my perspective.

 

So this doesn’t sound like I got the hoarding gene-but wait there’s more. Maybe I don’t gravitate to knick knacks or cutesy decorations, but I never met a tool, screw, nail, or any other home depot item I didn’t want to keep for all eternity. You never know when you might need them.

I also have a propensity for keeping documents that I might need at a later date-never mind the fact that I can’t ever find them again.

Hi, my name is Annette Mori and I am a hoarder like my father and grandmother before me. I need help. Is there a writer’s support group for other hoarders like myself?

Now that we are in the electronic age, I can keep every last version of my books on my computer. Do I need them, absolutely not, but who cares about needs when we are destined to follow our desires. I have a pathological need to track the evolution of my work. I suppose it can be a testament to how far I’ve come as a writer or more accurately how talented my editors are.

I also asked myself what else do I hoard and was aghast to realize that my need to save every single cat or kitten that crosses my path may very well be a manifestation of my hoarding. Earlier this year, I wrote about the definition of crazy cat lady and now I realize it’s just the hoarding disease my father and grandmother passed along to me that explains this phenomenon.

By now everyone who reads my blogs understands my eccentricities and unconventional view of the world, so maybe someday I’ll write a love story about a woman obsessed with collecting things, because after all even us hoarders deserve love. A recent editor described my style as chatty, eccentric and colloquial. I had to ask my mentor if that was a bad thing. I haven’t heard back yet, but I suspect even if it is, she will remain her wonderfully kind and tactful self and put it in perspective for me.

So if any of you have a propensity toward hoarding, can you consider collecting my books?  LOL.

A link to the first chapter of Asset Management: First Chapter of Asset Management,.  My first novel, Love Forever, Live Forever, is available in both e-book and print format. Links below will get you to all the places you can purchase the book.   Keep scrolling down for the links to Asset Management. Thanks for supporting a new writer!!  Coming soon is my two new books, Out of This World and Locked Inside.

Amazon              Affinity E-Book Press         Smashwords        Barnes and Noble     Bella Books

Here are the links to Asset Management:

Amazon         Affinity E-Book Press      Smashwords     Barnes & Noble     Bella Books