Sally Clarkson's Blog, page 55

Adventure or One More Cup of Tea: Introducing The Adventures of Miss TeaCup

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Adventures of Miss Tea Cup

“Would you like an adventure now, or would like to have your tea first?”

― J. M. Barrie, Peter Pan

Many of you know that I am almost never without tea or a tea cupo-o-really. For years, I pack a tin (can in America) that holds 1 or 2 tea cups, some dark sugar, a spoon and tea. I have traveled a lot over the years and I always wanted to take a little bit of hospitality and civility with me. So, when I would meet privately with people in my hotel room for counseling or have some moments with my children or Clay, I would lay a pashmina scarf on the coffee table in the room, light a small travel candle, put on music from my traveling speaker, make tea and serve in real cups--and voila, you have created a space for personal friendship and conversation. I was thinking about how much fun tea time Tuesday is for me so that I can share a variety of things I am reading, thinking, doing and I decided to add a component--The Adventures of Miss Tea Cup. I have a family of tea cups that sit together on my shelf wherever I live and I choose a couple of them when I travel to put into my tea can. So, stay tuned, you will be seeing my adventures with tea cup in hand. I have some adventures planned this very week---as. mom of 4 lively wee ones, I learned to see life as an adventure and to create a sense of joyful adventures along the way, even in mundane days.

Here in Oxford, Covid is still raging. As a matter of fact, several of my friends or their children have it right now. And so we hold our Monday night Bible study on Zoom tonight. (Sorry, I can't open it up for all over the world because there would be too many people.) So if you live in trajectory of Oxford you are invited, and or you can join us on zoom.

Every week, my life is filled with great conversations with my near and far away kids--so my heart and mind are always filled with great ideas and thoughts.

Today on my podcast, I share:

*Narrating a Good story of Your Life to Yourself--and Narrating a Beautiful Life to your Children--laying foundations for their repeated thoughts

*One of my Favorite Movies: Finding Neverland Read a Biography about JM Barrier--Kennsington Park--Frolicing

Healthy Life--can't do everything, so choose what is right for your life, your preferences, your personality. I am not an expert but after reading, studying and living for many years, these are *10 foods I keep on hand to add to a healthy life--try to eat them every day and then splurge on weekends of on special occasions.

1. Walnuts

2. Avocado

3. Blueberries

4. Pomegranite juice or seeds

5. Salmon--a couple of times a week

6. Olive Oil

7. Greens (by the handfuls)

8. Kraut--several spoonfuls

9. plain yoghurt with live cultures

10. fresh fruits and veggies in season--berries, carrots, broccoli, squash, oranges or tangerines, (salad with all of these on it)

10 glasses of water a day--tea x2 a day and coffee x 1 or 2 (I have a secret conviction that they are both healthy for you--they are fermented and plants--so there you go.

Why We Must Read to Keep our Faith and Hope Alive--foundations of thoughts that feed your spiritual and emotional health

My Secret Favorite Playlist on Spotify--

2 Books I am reading & A Couple of Readings for You

Convenant and Conversations: A Weekly Reading of the Jewish Bible Rabbi Jonathan Sacks

The Sound of Life's Unspeakable Beauty--Martin Schleske. photosynthysis

Help, I'm Drowning by Sally Clarkson--Don't Burn Out

Help, I'm Drowning: Weathering the Storms of Life with Grace and Hope By Clarkson, Sally Buy on Amazon Covenant & Conversation: Genesis: The Book of Beginnings By Sacks Rab, Rabbi Jonathan Buy on Amazon

Passing On A Heart for Virtue: 10 Gifts to Give Your Children Before They Leave Home

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"You cannot have holiness without sacrifice, righteousness without obedience, leadership without a servant heart, love without humility.

Sally Clarkson

In a performance-based society where we often measure ourselves by “test scores, degrees, power, money,” we are so busy trying to cover all that our children need to accomplish in life, that often, inadvertently we don’t invest enough time on cultivating virtue, faith, character, the issues of the heart and spirit.

Clay and I made specific goals for our children that had to do with heart, soul and spirit training beyond what we thought our children knew academically. We knew that unless they had internalized the vision of what it meant to be like Christ in their every day worlds, faith would just be something to know cognitively but without a foundation of the ways of thinking and walking in their adult lives.

Often, as believers, we live between two extremes, soul-killing legalism and rules and ensnaring tolerance and open-mindedness, under the auspices of grace. But only Biblical wisdom and truth can really prepare our children to emerge into their worlds prepared to encounter the secularism and temptations presented at every turn in a secular culture, as well as offer the insight for making mature decisions. .

Discernment is the ability to judge well between truth and vanity is reflected in the life of a mature believer. Discernment between good and evil and the willingness to obey whatever God requires is an evidence of one walking in the power of the Holy Spirit and following God's word. However, many do not even know what the word of God says anymore, so they follow online wisdom.

God's word provides the wisdom, boundaries, and insight for each day of our lives. Boundaries and fences and hedges are established for the protection of a land or home, the definition of its realm and the measuring of it's place. When you remove fences and borders, all sorts of havoc reigns. Boundaries provide definition, stability and security. Our culture calls out daily for the compromise and moving of boundaries in our lives. Without a depth of training in the Word, so many are caught up in the seemingly alluring messages—either to legalism and judgment or to compromise and compliance with less than Biblical ideals.

As I have said many times, “in the absence of Biblical conviction, people go the way of culture.”

In the weeks ahead, I will be hosting a podcast series from my book, 10 Gifts of Heart, a book Clay and I wrote to focus on the wisdom habits and principles we wanted our children to have before they left our home and entered into the world as young adults. Be sure to get your copy and follow along with me.

Today, I talk with my friend, Dr. Michael Ward, about his book, After Humanity, his newest book about C.S. Lewis, where we discuss the role virtue plays in the shaping of character. Be inspired.

(You can order his book through https://www.wordonfire.org/humanity/ and by ordering at this venue, you will receive a free copy of The Abolition of Man, only through this publisher.)

10 Gifts of Heart: What Your Child Needs to Take to Heart Before Leaving Home By Clarkson, Sally Buy on Amazon After Humanity: A Guide to C.S. Lewis’s The Abolition of Man By Ward, Michael Buy on Amazon

Cultivating A Beautiful Life

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Where there is tea, there is hope!

Sir Author Wing Pinero

Yes, indeed—hope! Today after a cold foray out in the winter weather to get some groceries, Joel greeted me with a cup of tea when I returned. Today, share a cup of tea with someone. Today’s theme is sort of about beauty and cultivating it through your life.

Some time ago, after a couple of trips and some wearying legs on an airplane, I had the privilege of attending a tea that one of my friends was holding in her home. The tables for 30 people around her living area in a modest home had been set with care. Flowers, candles, centerpieces with small art pieces placed here and there. 

Today’s Tea Time Tuesday is filled to the brim with music, books, a recipe, thoughts from my week and a surprise interview with my lovely daughter-in-law, Keelia Clarkson, about soul refreshment. I had the opportunity to attend a tea that one of my friends was holding in her home. The fare was simple but elegant--fresh fruit--grapes, tangerines, strawberries served on unmatched crystal dishes from the charity shop, with 3 kinds of cheese and multi-grain crackers. A scone and jam course. Finger sandwiches--cucumber, egg salad, ham and onion, cream cheese and finally chocolates. 

Classical music wafted through the air as all the women present talked quietly--it was as if the atmosphere drew out an elegance and pleasure from all of us because we were tasting of beauty.

Between each course, our hostess showed us different Pre-Raphaelite prints from England, beautiful prints of feminine women, knights, heroes and saints who were depicted by artists in the early 1900's who wanted to bring back the elegance and beauty into art. Alfred Lord Tennyson's life was told in between the prints as the foundation of many of the pictures being painted to reflect his poetry--in memoriam, being one of the best. The love story of his life, his struggle to prove himself, and his faithful love throughout his lifetime.

Our souls were elevated to higher thoughts. Our femininity was cultivated and refined and we were called upon to become more intellectually adept as we pondered how a movement of idealists had in influence on their culture because of their commitment to exalt marriage, and Biblical design of men and women reflecting excellence and beauty in character.

Listening to inspiration, desiring to become more ideal. And all because a woman, who is herself always learning and studying, wanted to pass on civility and beauty to her friends. I know it was a great amount of work, but her labor exalted our souls.

And so it is, we cannot pass on civility, beauty, intelligence, excellence of mind and heart, if we do not ourselves make these virtues a goal of our lives. Whatever we pursue and cultivate will determine what we are also able to pass on to all who we encounter. As stewards of our souls, we must seek to cultivate a garden of beauty--it must be a regular habit, a discipline, to expose ourselves to great minds, the best musicians, fine artists, great theologians, wonderful biographies--so that our souls will indeed reflect a museum of His great character and nobility--that of our great king.

The Sound of Life’s Unspeakable Beauty By Schleske, Martin

A New Year Awakens Wonder and Inspiration

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Integrity:

Soundness of moral principle and character; entire uprightness or fidelity, especially in regard to truth and fair dealing; purity, correctness, blamelessness.

As we start a new year, we must plan how we will grow in thought, word and deed, so we must plan how we as women will grow stronger — that we might better, every year, the reality of Christ and His light in this dark world. We become mentors who awaken wonder in others because of the integrity of inspiration in our own lives.

What is a woman to believe? What is true and what is just propaganda or at least not true? Which side to take?

There are so many issues and decisions and historical events swirling around and creating havoc, just like these cold arctic storms. Many women have written me messages and asked me to weigh in on all of the issues at hand. Of course, I have my own opinions as I am a reader and I study, listen to other people I think are wise, and live by my biblical values. But, I choose not to make them my main message because I want, most of all, to help encourage friends to learn how to think truly, biblically, and to act with conviction, based on wisdom and knowledge.

The starting point of us influencing anyone, children, co-workers, husbands, friends, begins with our own integrity of life and thought. Does our life hold together with wisdom? Do we have health in our spiritual life because we choose to build wisdom from His word? Does our behavior and character match up with our message? Do we serve others in such a way that they find our messages believable and true?

Most of all, are we pondering the heart of Christ, His stories, His commands, and values—and then are we embodying Him authentically to those around us—in our behavior, our heart issues, our thoughts, our actions?

A mentor brings out the best in those they serve and draws them to fulfill their potential through relationship. and passing on a legacy of inspiration and understanding begins with us embodying in all the areas of our life what we want to pass on.

On today’s podcast, I talk about making your life whole in mind, body, character, and actions so that those who listen to you have a virtuous, good, right model to follow.

Jesus said, “The student when fully trained will be like his teacher.”

And so, those who follow us, and our children who look to us as teachers, call us to become our best selves out of the accountability they hold us to as we model truth in front of them.

Listen to the podcast today and tell me what you think.

Awaking Wonder: Opening Your Child's Heart to the Beauty of Learning By Clarkson, Sally

Home Reflects the Art of Life

A few years ago, we were visiting a family for the first time. As we sat and talked, something was troubling me, but I could not put my finger on what it was: everything in the home—I should say, estate—was perfect. A garden without weeds, a house in perfect order, a meal with no mess somehow because all pots and pans had already been washed and put away before we sat down to eat it! Yet, something about the environment seemed sterile and stiff to Clay and me and to our children. The children themselves seemed uncomfortable; almost formal in some way, and seemed  afraid to move out of the context of "reserved politeness."  The atmosphere felt sterile, with an overhanging air of performance and judgment. The mom repeated three times as we were talking, "I am so exhausted, all the time!"

We talked later about the strange atmosphere of stress and strain, even in the midst of perfect order, because it was all so right and yet felt so wrong.

There seemed to be form without art or life.

I am not condemning order. How i love it, actually! And the feeling wasn’t the fault of high ideals, either. But if the ideals we hold focus on performance and not heart, all will be lost. And that is what it felt like to all of us while we were visiting this family— frankly, we even felt a subtle pressure to perform and not say the wrong thing while!

What an attitude we sometimes carry about God in our hearts, as though He is some kind of angry old man, terminally disappointed in us for not being more perfect. He is not crossing his arms, looking scornfully down at us, saying, "Well, I was going to encourage you today and tell you how much I love you. But I can't--look at that pile on your desk, that towering pile of laundry, all undone! I suspect you must be doing something wrong, because you are laughing too much today!"

Instead He is saying, "Woohoo! You sat with your child and watched Me paint a sunset! You were patient with that spilled milk and fuss one more time--you listened to that weepy teen and didn't even get correct him, even though you were exhausted! You are my precious one and I love that you are doing your best. I love you. I am with you, I am proud of you for keeping at it!"

A home is a place of life filled by a mother whose life is contagious because of her sparkle in the midst of messes, her laughter in the midst of duty, her song pervading the whole place--the music, feasts, art, and joy of life--flowing out of a heart that has found this joy in her God.

‎"To build a home of ideals means a life of sacrifice. It means a lot of work, and it's never going to be over. These ideals don't come easily to anyone; they come through battle. It's an illusion to think that building a place of beauty ever happens naturally to anyone; it happens little by little ... through hard work ... when we cultivate our souls, our kids will have something to draw from .. the house with the life of God isn't a perfect house, it's a redeemed house! It's not a home without sin, or without messes or without spilled milk, but we redeem one more moment, in the joy of living with Him, and that moment becomes a memory, an unspoken message that lasts for life... " Mission of Motherhood

The Mission of Motherhood: Touching Your Child's Heart for Eternity By Clarkson, Sally

Tea Time Tuesday 2022: A New Year Begins

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(This photo was taken while I was with my Joel. He said, “Mama, the light is streaking across your hair. Can I take a photo of you?” Sweet one made me feel seen! :))

There are rewards to life if you live long enough! Nothing touches my mama heart more than having one of my boys, now grown men, asking me to meet for a coffee and friend time. Saturday afternoon, Joel texted, “How bout I buy you a cup of coffee and we can meet at your favorite little cafe?” (I have about 10 favorite cafes—why stick to just one?)

Our habit is to sit in two small leather overstuffed chairs next to the window. We are pretty convinced that no one else knows you can sit there. Ahhh, it was free! And so we sipped, looked out the window at the shiny pavement, fresh with Oxford rain, and talked about all the things friends share together when they are fast friends. Of course, when you are with a favorite, you never have enough time. That is how I feel with Joel, who always encourages me. And my Nathan, predictably has a soft heart for me, so I feel spoiled. It only takes about a thousand years and lots of gray hair and a million experiences to live through.

Best friendships are made because you make the time. You initiate, you share, you trust, you encourage—you make memories. So, this is a good time to make sweet memories and moments with those you hope to be best friends with in another decade.

I have so much fun sharing a part of my heart and life events on Tea-time Tuesdays. Be sure to give me your feedback and let me know your own ideas and life events.

Today I share about some favorite parts of Oxford that I enjoy, foods this week, a favorite musical album to go along with a mellow season, (Music for the Lifegiving Home, by Joel Clarkson), And I end with a favorite reading of a story from Help, I’m Drowning—a reading I hope will encourage you.

I send my love and prayers your way, my friends. Thanks for joining me.

Help, I'm Drowning: Weathering the Storms of Life with Grace and Hope By Clarkson, Sally

Covering a Multitude of Sin with Love

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Occasionally darkness seems to cloud my emotions and thoughts. The light eeks out of my soul suddenly, and I glance inside at the state of my heart. Sometimes, I find myself in a place where I want to run away—away from the challenges in relationships with my loved ones, away from the constant needs and demands of life (cooking, cleaning, work of every kind and then all over again.)

This is evidently a normal occurrence in some seasons of life for most women. I would love to flee the dramatic (All children, it seems, must go through stages—It starts out with toddlerhood, moves through developmental stages, escalates in late elementary years, Explodes with teens, Grows more serious with young adults. Then there is the period of self-realization or self-actualization that takes place with all maturing young adults.) And parents must learn how to navigate these mysterious places with grace and stay on top of their own lives.

It’s ok to feel like sometimes life is just plain hard.

But in those moments, we must learn to give ourselves grace for ourselves or we will explode from unrealistic expectations. We are putting so much pressure on ourselves as mothers. Each time we find ourselves too busy to cook (so we opt for fast food), too exhausted to clean, (so we “leave it until tomorrow”) or so hectic in our lives that we didn't do a devotional with our children one whole week, we feel absolutely defeated and believe that we somehow failed in life.

While it is incredibly wonderful to set our standards high and live within these great ideals, as I have said many times before,

We must hold ourselves to a standard of grace, not perfection.

Each of us is a miracle, a work of art, an expression of the artist God—and each of us is flawed. It is why Jesus came, to alleviate our shame and guilt.

Yet, when I take time to ponder, to really look at the beauty of my precious ones, my family, my friends, beyond the irritating moments, I will be in awe of what sweetness God has shared with me. It is simple to see all the flaws in my children, my husband, and myself. And it would be easy for me to take the blame for their failures, since I am the captain of our daily lives, and responsible for training them! But that is not healthy or biblical.

So, I have come to practice several commitments to help me see each person for who they are inside. And to bring a fresh wind of grace to each moment. 

1. Assume the best about people in your life and choose to love them according to their needs. Recognize that they are growing, struggling, living with their imperfect selves.

My little one is not plotting to make my life miserable by being needy. My children expresse his needs through crying and whining to let me know something doesn’t feel right in their world.

It is a grace for me to be patient and seek to bring comfort and, again, grace! Same with my teen, my adult child. Their motivation in life is not to frustrate me. They are frustrated with the imperfections of life, (of which I am one), but God encourages me to be long-suffering, patient, humble if I am to identify with and understand Jesus. I am their coach who gets to encourage them through the frustration. My husband is not necessarily mad at me but he is frustrated with the bills, the long hours of work, the things that keep falling apart, my friends also have a context that may cause them, for the moment, to be frustrated or angry. 

2. I am asking God to help me see people from his perspective.

I told  my extroverted children that they should not feel bad about being loud and bigger than life--God made them (and me!) that way and he actually liked them as they were as He made them that way. His design was good and  our personalities have a unique purpose. Look at always talking Peter, who Jesus called his "rock." What about David who danced before God with all his might and pleased God through it. Or the "too quiet" child who is timid. Perhaps this gentleness will serve to open the hearts of those needing a gentle, quiet spirit. Look for the good attributes of everyone you meet and affirm them for those great qualities.

3. Treat others the way I want to be treated. 

I have lots of moody times. When I am too busy, I become a drill sergeant. When I am depressed, I have darkness and cry. When I am in a hurry, I am impatient. Yet, I sort of want every one in the world to make me an exception, to just understand why I am grumpy and to give me a pass. I want perfect understanding for my hormones and I long for gentle love and affection, which, in my case, wins the day. Even if I do not always have what feels like meets my needs, I can understand that my others long for something that their particular selves need. Maybe that is what “my others” want when they keep exposing their imperfect moods, too. 

I am not talking about not training and not helping your children to learn not to be whiners or complainers. We need to slowly train that out of them. But I am talking about how to understand, how to approach them as I am witnessing these things. I ask, "Is my little one too exhausted to be able to handle life in a mature way?” Then I will be patient, cuddle them and put them to bed. Is my teen feeling rejected by his peers? Then he doesn't need more criticism, he needs a friend. Is my husband discouraged by something at work? Maybe he needs a cold drink, a time on the front porch to ease his bad day. 

However, rather than focusing on the bad, it’s more beneficial to focus on faith and the potential someday to be realized after years of praying and seeing God work through the moments I choose to be patient, kind and sympathetic; faith that God can take my honest offering of steadfastness, love and hope and make it into a beautiful legacy.

He will make up for my deficits and I will fill in the cracks for the deficits of those in my life. But in order to be the love, words and caress of Jesus to those in my life, I must relinquish my own needs, for the moment. This relinquishing happens one minute at a time--one detail of my life at a time.But this sort of love will change the course of my family's lives forever.

A New Year, Time to Celebrate!

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There was the true Light which, coming into the world, enlightens every man. John 1:9

Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying,

“Glory to God in the highest,

and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests.”Luke 2:13-14

Another year is upon us! What story will we tell with our lives? What events will occus? Every year, I set a new table and we begin again to celebrate His life, His light through us. I pray as you open a new year, you will have reason to find great joy along your path. Every season, each day is one worth finding joy.

Celebrating is a part of God's nature. The crickets sing to God, the birds chirp to God, the sunrise and sunset sing of His glory, the stars declare His glory and beauty.

God was so excited to celebrate the incarnation of His son on earth, that He crafted and designed in his honor a chandelier in the heavenlies for this special occasion. Imagine a Father saying, "I love you so much, I will give you a star for your birthday, and then the wealthiest kings of this small globe called earth will bring riches untold for your birthday present. I have arranged the heavenly host to sing a cantata, filling the sky, just to celebrate this moment, and all the earth will hear of your birthday party throughout all the generations."

Those he chose as the audience were the very ones who took care of sheep, the very symbol of His son--those who probably had hearts most ready to engage in  worship,  because nightly they delighted in the  display of splendor strewn across their ceiling, with twinklings, flurries of comets, galaxies waxing eloquent to the rhythm of their creator's bidding. These who had eyes to see and hearts to worship became the attendees of His celebratory party.

And so, I desire to have such eyes--to see His glory in the natural course of my own life. To hear the melodies that daily display songs of praise in the creation He has made, to see His very fingerprints in the eyes and souls of the precious ones in my home.

And so, in His honor, I bring light into my own personal darkness where we also live in the fallen place, a palette of color into the humble outpost of my daily lives and worship.

There is a life and hope and energy in this celebrating. It brings all earthly struggles into perspective, a baby bringing life that would conquer all ills, calm all storms, wrest all evil powers, heal all wounds.

Isaiah finds him so, "And His name shall be called Wonderful,  Counselor, the mighty God, the Everlasting Father, the Prince of Peace."

May He bless you and be all that you need and desire in the moments of 2022!

DeCluttering Your Soul: Planning a Year For Joy

The joy of the Lord is my strength. Nehemiah 8: 10

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Today, I am just beginning to settle back into a normal-ish routine. After having 10 people in my home for 5 days, meals, celebrations, messes, joys, I am always ready to breathe in a new year. As usual, I love the celebration of life and the traditions and the fun and the beauty of special times spent with my children, husband and friends that Christmas brings. But, there is something deeply satisfying to me about getting it all put away and getting back to normal. With 10 of us around our small house, some on couches and floors, toys, cookies, coffee and tea cups, paper, we had fun—but a sort of gentle chaos at all moments..

Closing this season is also a little bit of a relief to me, as I know the wonderful freedom to start a new year, as Anne says, “With no mistakes in it” gives me a tingling excitement. But this year, as we in the UK are threatened with new lockdowns and more limitations, I face this new year with a little bit of trepidation. Who could ever have thought 2021 was going to be so out of control. And it looks like 2022 may follow suit.

Every year as close as possible to New Year’s, I try to get away for a bit to do something I’ve come to call decluttering my soul. This year, I will have to try to find a place in my home where I will be alone at least for some of the time. Many have listened to my “Declutterung your soul” podcast. Today’s blog is the foundation for verses, Gods voice and truths that are the basis of my planning. Be sure to read it or print it out to use.

Getting Rid of Soul Clutter

Even as we might sort out a closet, throw away out dated and used clothing, papers, books, toys, unnecessary items, so we need to sort our our feelings, thoughts, spirit, body, life. We need to clean out and throw out unneeded items in order to start out with a clean slate. I think sometimes in the demands of life, we carry burdens inside that we are not even aware of. These burdens keep us from living in the freedom, peace and love God intended us to experience every day. But it takes time and intentionality to off-lift burdens, to wash my heart clean and to move forward with the grace and energy God wants me to experience every day. Here I’m sharing my thoughts from years past about what that looks like, as I will follow the same pattern again, and hope you will join me for this most important of tasks as we enter a new season!

As many of you know, I have been sharing about decluttering my soul for many years. This year, for those who are a part of our membership, Lifewithsally.com, we have put together a wonderful new year retreat planner for you so that you can refocus on what matters for you and get a breath for good as a new start.

This year, I have a theme for my new start—I will pursue joy as God intends. I was struck by the angel who announced, “Do not be afraid; for behold, I bring you good news of great joy which will be for all the people.” God cares that all of us have great joy. And this is my wish for all of you, my friends, that you have deep joy in your year ahead. Happy 2022!

Now to the heart of decluttering: We can all see how too much clutter and too many piles causes us to feel overwhelmed with life. Consequently, slowly, I have learned to declutter as often as I can—throwing away unnecessary stuff. Clay is really the master at this. He helps me get rid of things, organize things, and put away things. Yesterday, he decluttered our pantry—threw away chip bags that held little but took up space, cleared out empty water bottles and bad, junky Christmas candy that would never eaten, baskets that had fallen off of their nails, groceries that had never been put in their place. Now, if someone came into my pantry, they would mistakenly think that I am an organized person. (Thank goodness for Clay!) It made me feel good just to open the door and to see that all is manageable again.

I have come to realize my brain and heart can be the same way---cluttered with worries, responsibilities, duties, children’s future, finances, time constraints, expectations, disappointments, critical attitudes, resentment. All these added together can tend to create soul piles and mind clutter. If I don’t take the time to sort the piles, my spirit becomes a mess and my heart becomes overwhelmed and weary.

This year, as with last, I have stored up some very distinct sadnesses, confusion, disappointment, occasionally anger that needs to be dealt with—Covid and all its cancellations. months inside, an unexpected hip surgery, activities and church cancelled. isolation, political distress and conflict on all sides of social media, the protests and deaths of so many, storms, deaths of friends, and so much more.

It is what awakened me at 4:00 a.m, filled with thoughts and prayers for my precious ones. And this is another reason I like January. Not because of the clutter waking me, but because the new month in the new year gives me an opportunity to make a new plan, to simplify the mind messes and to start off a whole new year well. In the same way that throwing away stuff and clearing out closets brings me relief—even more—soul and mind cleaning and decluttering brings me rest.

So, as I begin a new year, I resolve to deal with my soul-clutter, so that I may have strength to face each day in peace. I come to the place where I know I will find the help that I need. I come to my Father and ask Him to help me, His child, and ask Him show me how to make get rid of the junk that is unnecessary, to help me clean out and organize my soul.

To begin with, God speaks to me gently.

*Release

Release is the first phase for me. I seek to release, to identify, to unearth all of the pressures, fears and burdens I am carrying.

It was in writing my book, Dancing with My Father, that I learned so much about finding joy and peace. In Him, with Him, by Him all the moments of my busy day. His voice leads me to what I long for--but I must get rid of all that causes me to fret, worry, criticize, control. There is a way....

“In quietness and rest shall be your strength.” Isaiah 30:15 You need to come to me and give me all those things that are weighing on your heart. Resolve to seek rest and peace.

“Come to me all who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” Matthew 11:28-29

Only God can give us what we need. Only He is the source of rest and peace.

I listed all my issues this morning in my journal (and there seem to be multitudes of clutter piles in my soul--worries, attitudes, bitterness, weariness, fear, sin and a few more!) These are issues that will suck me dry and my energy dry if I do not notice them in order to clean out my soul.

The Lord prompted, "List all of your issues, give them over to Me. Don’t hold on to them. I am capable of taking them from you and being responsible so that you will not be weary or carry what you are not capable of carrying.”

*Choose Rest, Believe in His ability to Hold You

"Rest in the Lord and wait patiently for Him. “ Psalm 37:7

Focus on resting in me—sit in my lap, and rest in my arms. Let me carry you. I love you. Wait for my timing. Don’t force things or beg me to hurry up. I am in control.

“Be still (cease striving) and know that I am God.” Psalm 46:10

“Surely I have calmed and quieted my soul, like a weaned child with his mother;Like a weaned child is my soul within me.” Psalm 131:2

Give me your attention and get control of your spirit. Be quiet. Be still. Recognize my sovereignty and transcendence. Remember what Jesus said, “Our Father who art in heaven, holy is your name, your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.” Jesus modeled his understanding that my will is what you need to rest in. I am in heaven and I see all things—the future, the past, your children, your relationships, --all your clutter. Give them to me. Quiet your soul and rest in my strength and power.

*Trust

Assuredly, I say to you, unless you are converted and become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore whoever humbles himself as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoever receives one little child like this receives me.” Matthew 18:3-5

Come to Me as a child—even as your children, in their innocence and sweetness of heart, know that you will care for them and meet their needs because you are a loving parent who cares for them, so I am your Father who will take care of you. Leave the burdens to your Father and take your rightful place as a child. Humble yourself and trust Me. Enjoy Me. Delight in the beautiful moments of this day. Notice the little miracles. Live as an unfettered child. Accept your little and big children and receive them as a gift from Me, and You will indeed receive me into your midst.

“ ... a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.” I Peter 3:4

*Simplify

“Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about so many things. But really one is needed and Mary has chosen the good part, which shall not be taken away from her.” Luke 10 41-42

Don’t worry and fret and stew and stir up unnecessary dust. Choose simplicity—just one thing I require—that you give it all to Me and love Me. I will take over. Even as I gave and provided a Sabbath in which all of My children should have rest from their work, so I want you to live in my Sabbath rest for your soul. Rest from your striving and labor. Take time for naps, for pleasure, for joy. This day you have to receive as a gift--I can't promise what tomorrow will hold. But today you can love, give peace, speak kind and wise words, dance in your soul with My secret pleasure that comes from knowing that I love you. Simplify your life, don’t make choices that will complicate or add unnecessary pressure or cause you to sin or grumble. “Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life,” as Paul said.

So, as I yielded my lists into God’s hands and de-cluttered my troubled soul, I left feeling that even as my house has been coming to order after we cleaned and straightened it yesterday, so now my soul is moving in the direction of order.

How should I declutter my soul?

Check your heart for any guilt or unconfessed sin. I have found that letting God erase my weight of real or false guilt, helps me to admit with God that I need Him, His grace and His forgiveness.

Are there any hurts, burdens, fears, worries from the past year that you are carrying on your own shoulders? Write them down, give them over into God’s hands and ask for practical wisdom about how to handle it. Pray from your heart about how you need help.

Are you carrying any bitterness, worries, cynicism that is stealing from you? When we do not give forgiveness or accept the limitations of a circumstance or person, we are the ones who suffer the most. Be humble, give up bitterness, revenge, a gossiping heart and mouth.

What are some dreams or ways you need to see God help you? Ask Him to provide for you—what is on your heart. God delights in answering prayer.

Are you cherishing the world or worldly things too much? Is it keeping you from being close to Him, from developing righteous values? What do you need to change to move toward a closer walk with God? books? conference? daily time?

What does it mean to “Seek first God’s kingdom for you this year? Only in His priorities will we find centeredness and blessing. List what your eternal/kingdom goals are and how to get there.

Be yourself. Make plans that suit your loves, your personality, your limitations. Your story will be different than that of anyone else. Don’t carry the burden of comparison to others or a phantom that makes you think you should be a certain way. Be free, live in grace.

So many planners and so many ways to feel guilty or less than, but when we seek Him and His priorities and free ourselves from the burdens we are not meant to carry, we will find strength and purpose for each day.

May you know God’s deep love for you, His sovereignty even over unsure places and times and especially His joy. I pray you have a wonderful New Year and a light soul.

Life with Sally Membership

A Blessed, Light-Filled, Merry Christmas to All!

It has become tradition to share this scripture with you all the week of Christmas, and I’m so grateful to do that once again this year! Have you ever thought about the fact that the Father celebrated Christmas first? I pray this Christmas has found your heart filled with the blessed Light Jesus has brought into the world.

That night there were shepherds staying in the fields nearby, guarding their flocks of sheep. Suddenly, an angel of the Lord appeared among them, and the radiance of the Lord’s glory surrounded them. They were terrified, but the angel reassured them. “Don’t be afraid!” he said. “I bring you good news that will bring great joy to all people. The Savior—yes, the Messiah, the Lord—has been born today in Bethlehem, the city of David! And you will recognize him by this sign: You will find a baby wrapped snugly in strips of cloth, lying in a manger.” Suddenly, the angel was joined by a vast host of others—the armies of heaven—praising God and saying,“Glory to God in highest heaven,and peace on earth to those with whom God is pleased.”Luke 2:8-14

Our heavenly Father was the first to celebrate Christmas. He was the first one to document the birthday of Jesus—supernaturally, with music performed before humble shepherds and faraway kings. When I think about the wonders of the first Christmas—astonishing, bewildering, unimaginable beings appearing on the earth, extraterrestrial choirs filling the sky, a heretofore unknown star rising in the heavens, learned kings traveling from afar, a virgin birth in the midst of a love story, an old woman and an old man marveling and speaking of the Messiah as the baby is dedicated—I can’t help but think they were part of God’s plan to help us celebrate Jesus’ arrival.

Christmas is a time when we bring friends and family into our home to be refreshed. It is a time of personal worship and a time of joy. It’s a time of work and preparation, but all to say “I love you” and “God loves us and is worthy of our celebration of Him.” In these traditions we understand that God wanted us to put aside special times for the passing down of His story and His love.

How will you pass down and celebrate the celebration of God on this day we celebrate the birthday of Jesus? May your Christmas be full of His love, peace, and hope!