Dave Gorman's Blog, page 28

A Tour Diary. Sort Of.

In no particular order...

Hello Cardiff!


Hello Salford!



Hello Sheffield!



Hello Newcastle!



Hello Derby!

Jabba, Jabba, Hey!

I'm getting a lot of emails from people asking me to play games with them when my tour gets to their town... but it's not proving very doable.

There isn't a lot of free time... or rather, there isn't a lot of predictable free time. Sometimes setting the show up takes two hours, sometimes it takes four. Sometimes we have a hundred miles to drive, sometimes we have three hundred. I can't accurately predict when we're going to arrive at each venue and when, if at all, we'll be able to duck out of there pre-show.

It makes it impossible to arrange a playdate in advance and means the best I can ever do is really a more spontaneous, pre-show game of darts... something I've managed in Norwich, Shrewsbury and, Aldershot.

In Aldershot I was delighted to discover a dartboard backstage. This was perfect for me because when the technical side of the show is being set up I have to be around but I don't have to actually be there the whole time. So I could play for 20 minutes, go and help focus a projector and then return to play. I played all through the interval. It's the perfect pre-show ritual.

I mentioned it on twitter (my apologies to all those people who seem to find the mere mention of darts distressing in some way) and mused that if every venue had a backstage dartboard I'd be a very happy man.

And my prayers were answered. Jamie Caven - Jabba180 on twitter - got in touch and said he was coming to the show in Derby and reckoned he could bring a Unicorn On Tour with him. I'd never heard of the 'on tour' but essentially it's a contraption that straps to a door and turns it into a mounting for a dartboard.

So last night my dream came true and Jamie turned up with an on tour - and some other goodies - and my dressing room became a darts room. I'm a very happy boy.

I'm also a bit of a fan boy. Because Jamie is a seriously impressive darts player. In that he's one of the top ranked players in the world. But you don't even have to be into darts to find Jamie impressive. I won't give you his whole life story... but I will tell you that he got stung by a bee when he was a kid... and as a result he's blind in one eye.

Blind in one eye. Professional darts player. That's just ridiculous. He throws tungsten arrows through 3D space... with vision in only one eye. And he's bloody brilliant at it. When he draws back his throwing arm he loses sight of his dart and only sees it again on the forward motion. Whether you're into darts or not, that is awe-inspiring.

Having set the board up he encouraged me to throw some darts. I was nervous - in that fanboy way - but they weren't bad. Especially for first-darts-of-the-day. I threw another three. The third one hit the treble twenty. I was relieved not to have humiliated myself in his company.

After a while Jamie took my darts off me and had a go too. His normal darts are 23 grams. Mine are 26. His are stick thin, like tiny pencils, mine are chunky, nubby, stumpy things. Within three or four minutes he'd thrown a 180. That's ridiculous.

Anyway... I'm hugely grateful to him and his wife Debbie (who isn't in the photos because she took them) and to UnicornDarts for the gift. Every theatre now has a backstage dartboard and this tour - already the most enjoyable I've done - just got even easier.

A Tour Review

Untitled, originally uploaded by Dave Gorman.

In Edinburgh, at the festival, you can't help but be aware of reviews. Even those people who say they don't want to read them know there's something they're trying to avoid reading.

But on tour, you don't really give it a second thought. I never ask if we have any reviewers in because there's no point. It's not as though I'd change the show if I knew they were there. I know it sounds cheesy but we try and do the best show every night, whatever the circumstances.

Anyway... I had no idea we'd been reviewed until this morning when I was having my breakfast in Bedford (which is just a ford away from the best place to have breakfast) and as I flicked through the paper I happened upon it. It's a review of the Aldershot show and it's lovely.

"Dave Gorman's latest offering, Powerpoint Presentation, is a much-needed reminder of how a truly gifted performer can delve beyond clever punchlines and make us look afresh at the world. The nearest thing we have to that late, great American raconteur, Spalding Gray, he turns monomania into the most compelling and uplifting of confessionals.

"The man who taught us about the mysteries of the Googlewhack takes off on another technological journey in this show using a screen and projector as his silent foil. The techie display however, never comes close to swamping the human element. Each intricately crafted routine becomes a masterclass in timing..."

Which is all rather lovely. I'm a huge admirer of Spalding Gray so to be included in the same breath as him is absolutely thrilling. Truly. I'm chuffed.

Home Town Hatred.

I know this could be much more interesting, originally uploaded by Dave Gorman.

We Brits are a self-deprecating bunch. As I tend to tweet about what I'm up to - and right now I'm on tour - that means I've been tweeting about my travels.

And I've noticed that whenever I mention that I'm heading to a town - any British town - I instantly get a load of replies from people saying, "I wouldn't bother heading there if I were you... it's horrible!"

And these tweets come from locals. Not from people in the town just up the road. From people who live there. Because if there's one thing that unites Britain, it's our inability to like wherever it is we're from. It seems to be a knee-jerk reaction for people who just automatically dislike the town they live in.

Which makes me wonder a) why they live there and b) quite what delights they think the other towns of Britain possess.

But also... well, it seems to misunderstand the purpose of my visit. I'm not going to hang out in the centre of town watching youths drink cider. I'm going to a theatre to do my job. Which is, y'know... kinda fun.

Even if it's true that a particular town is horrible, the chances are that the people who buy tickets to come and sit in the theatre there aren't. They tend to be lovely. So I get to see a lovely side of the place. All of them. I certainly have so far.

I think it also relates to the peculiar idea people have that I'm somehow picking and choosing which towns I visit. The prosaic truth, of course, is that, like all self-employed people I'm going where the work is.

I make myself available for touring... some theatres book the show... and... um, that's it.

I don't research each town to see that its residents are delighted and proud to call it home first before deciding to accept the booking. If I did, I wouldn't end up accepting many gigs... British people hate their home towns far too much for that.

The Glamour Of Touring

Dear Mum,

Touring is very glamorous. We stayed in a fancy hotel in Portsmouth.

So fancy it had an illustrious bar.









And tonight we're playing in a hexagon.


Having a wonderful time.



Your ever loving son,


Dave






As it happens, I really am loving it. Jay, Kumar (my tour manager) and I make for a happy vanload of jolly, mild-mannered sorts so while most touring has had the ennui of travel punctuated by the fun of gigs, this is more the fun of travel punctuated by the even-more-fun of gigs.

Come and join us some time in Salisbury, Aldershot, Bedford, Derby, Sheffield, Bradford, Newcastle, Cardiff, Manchester, Liverpool, Aberdeen, Edinburgh, Nottingham, Cambridge, Southend, Dorking, Brighton, Milton Keynes, Guildford, Bournemouth, Dublin, Birmingham, Oxford, York, Middlesbrough, Bristol, High Wycombe, Tunbridge Wells, Watford, Cheltenham, Wolverhampton, Leicester, London, Coventry, Carlisle, Preston, Perth or Belfast...

Hey Jay

Well... the start of my new tour is almost upon us. It's certainly almost upon me. Obviously, I hope it'll be upon some of you too.

I'm delighted to announce that I'll be supported on the tour by the fantastic Jay Foreman (not pictured).

And it's not just because of all the comics on the circuit he's the one whose name most sounds like my own. It's because he's ace.

For five months earlier this year I hosted Dave Gorman's Screen Guild at Hoxton Hall. It allowed me to develop all the material that's in this show as well as giving me an opportunity to introduce an audience to my favourite acts. Jay is definitely one of them. He did one of the Hoxton gigs and went down a storm. It was obvious to me then that his material was the perfect compliment to mine and when I saw his Edinburgh show this year - definitely one of my favourites - I knew I wanted to get him on this tour. I can't tell you how chuffed I am that he's agreed to get involved.

Oh all right, I can tell you. Very. I'm very chuffed.

You can find out more about Jay at his website website

But trust me. He's fab.

The tour kicks off in Norwich on September 26th and I think the first few nights are sold out. I think the first night you can still get tickets for is Portsmouth on October 5th. (I know this won't mean anything to you unless you've read my latest book, but I was surprised this week to get an email from 'Steve' (the star of Chapter 26) telling me he's not coming to the show in Portsmouth. That a man who punched me felt the need to announce his non-attendance is, um... well, interesting to say the least!)

From there the show travels to Reading, Salisbury, Aldershot, Bedford, Derby, Sheffield, Bradford, Newcastle, Cardiff, Salford, Liverpool, Aberdeen, Edinburgh, Nottingham, Cambridge, Southend, Dorking, Brighton, Milton Keynes, Guildford, Bournemouth, Dublin, Birmingham, Oxford, York, Middlesbrough, Bristol, High Wycombe, Tunbridge Wells, Watford, Cheltenham, Wolverhampton, Leicester, London, Coventry, Carlisle, Preston, Perth... and finally Belfast on November 31. Phew.

I hope the show is coming somewhere near you and that you can get along... and if it isn't... well, that's because somewhere-near-you didn't book it!

You can get all the details on the tour from the live dates page of my site.

a proud husband writes...

Mrs Gorman is in the band, Louise & The Pins. (She's one of the Pins)



Their first single was released today (itunes). I'm a bit proud.







For the avoidance of doubt, Mrs Gorman isn't in the video.

Transfer Deadline Day Picture Exclusive.

This is how a transfer rumour grows...























Sorry.

I'm home.

28 shows in 26 days. Knackered. Pleased. Very proud. And back at home.

Another Two-Show Day

Edinburgh, originally uploaded by Dave Gorman.

It turns out I was lying when I said it was just 7.40pm every night and business-as-usual from here on in.



I loved the afternoon show on Saturday - and it sold out - and next Saturday evening is sold out too... so we've put another Saturday afternoon show in for next week.



So... it's business as usual for the week - and tickets are available for Monday onwards - but on Saturday I've got another matinee. 8 days and 9 shows left to go...