Dave Gorman's Blog, page 11

Next Year's Tour... A Map And Some Gaps.

The feedback on episode 5 of Modern Life Is Goodish was incredible last night. There re are things I'd like to mention (at one point a lot of people paused and ran to their kitchen) but if I went into any detail about it here I think I'd end up generating spoilers for people who will (hopefully) be watching the repeat tonight at 10.40pm... so maybe I'll save that for another day.



I am getting a lot of questions about my next tour, so I figured it was worth answering some of the frequently asked questions here.



It's become very apparent that a list of venues in date order isn't always the best way for people to search for their local gig. I've had a lot of emails from people who've scrolled through and not seen a gig local to them, even though there is one. Often in their home town. But even so, I figured a map might be more helpful for some. Each star represents a show on the tour.





It does become obvious that there are a few gap, the furthest into the south west that the tour goes is Yeovil and, while there's a show in Aberdeen, there's nothing else in Scotland.



These gaps are the source of the most frequently asked questions I'm asked... with people asking me if I'd consider doing a show here or why there isn't a show there. Often people ask these questions with an attitude that suggests I have deliberately sought to avoid the area out of disdain for the locality. Which seems to fundamentally misunderstand what a tour involves. My experience of every town I play is lovely. I often don't find out what the town is like - I don't spend my time there sitting in the town centre by the bins - I spend my time there in a venue. The people I meet in a town are the people who wanted to come and see my show. And that makes everywhere lovely. Touring is a very affirming experience.



But there is an explanation for the gaps. The reason is that I don't book venues, they book me. Sometimes it might be that they tried to book the show but didn't have dates that worked. Sometimes it might be that a venue didn't have the right technical set up for one of my shows. And sometimes it might be that they didn't want the show or thought it wouldn't sell. Venues tend to know their own market so I have complete respect for that.



But that's the reason. If I'm playing somewhere it's because they booked me. If I'm not... it's because they didn't. Like most performers, I'm a gun for hire... I go where the work is.



There are two places on this particular tour where venues did want the show but it hasn't worked out for another reason. Those venues are in Glasgow and in Oxford.
In both cases I've said no to doing the show there because the venues concerned charge punters booking fees etc that I think are unreasonable



They're both venues that are run by The Ambassadors Theatre
Group. At every other venue on the tour, I think the booking fees are between 50p and £3 but somehow in an ATG venue it works out at an extra £6 to
£9 per ticket.



I'm not the only
performer to take exception to them. As you can see here, Sarah Millican refuses to play ATG
venues while this story tells you how Jason
Manford felt when he discovered the cost of his tickets in Oxford.



I am sorry not to be playing those venues. But it's a simple choice to make. I don't think the charges are fair. So I don't want to condone them by playing there. I had been trying to avoid making a stink about it - and would still like to do so - but I've been asked the question about Glasgow so many times in the last ten days and always answered honestly and so it makes sense to put something here that I can point people towards when next I'm asked. 

That Hat Has Taken Its Rightful Place...

This won't make a lot of sense to you unless you've been watching Modern Life Is Goodish and following this blog and/or my mailing list... but for those that have, here's some confirmation that one of the prizes from the mailing list competitions has arrived and is now in its rightful place:

Woop, post has arrived! Thanks to @DaveGorman for the new bathroom decoration! #couldntresist #shittinghat pic.twitter.com/APK5tUIntY

— Dee Traynor (@dee_traynor) October 15, 2013

Yep, unlucky Dee Traynor now has the original Shitting Hat! Ian Salt has the Gorscreen and the jumper from episode four is on its way to Ireland to Mike Ericsson as I type.


If you're on the mailing list you'll know that this week's competition is for two tickets to the next tour. Oddly, two or three people have already emailed in answers to that question. I say "oddly" because the point of the question each week is that it relates to the upcoming show. If you watch the show, you'll see the answer. But instead, they've taken guesses. Which are a little wide of the mark.

Anyway... the fifth episode is on Dave, tonight at 10pm. I hope you can catch it.

Next week... knitwear!

So I've just been to the post office to send the Gorscreen Frame to the winner of the first Modern Life Is Goodish competition that I previously blogged about here. Congratulations to Ian Salt. I have no idea what possible use it will be to him... but it's his. Or at least it will be in a day or two.



If you're on my mailing list, then you'll know that this week I decided to give away a hat. Yes. That hat. I think that during Tuesday night's show the hashtag #ShittingHat was, albeit briefly, a Twitter trending topic but I didn't see it myself so I can't confirm it.



But on Wednesday morning, as I looked back at the number of people who sent me pictures of their shitting hats... and the number of tweets from people saying they were going to get one, I started to wonder if it was possible this show had done for, um, Shitting Hats, what Delia once did for cranberries. (Probably not)

@DaveGorman Everyone needs a #ShittingHat! Here's my friend Julie's. We were at the recording. Great show! pic.twitter.com/zfWgkwFgAY

— Helen Lawrence (@MrsHeckles) October 2, 2013

I think @DaveGorman has started something here... #ShittingHat #Goodish pic.twitter.com/TTZFvMTGOf

— Chris Driver (@ChrisDriver) October 2, 2013

@DaveGorman A Shitting Hard Hat #ShittingHat pic.twitter.com/2a0T9uSQwy

— Lindz (@LindseyBrogan) October 2, 2013

@DaveGorman This. This I blame you for. #shittinghat pic.twitter.com/ikVe4a6m5G

— Kelly Warner (@KellyEcho85) October 2, 2013

And, perhaps most disturbingly, this...

@DaveGorman I need this for the smell too. pic.twitter.com/Bu18oSrWAb

— Boba Phil (@BobaPhil) October 1, 2013

Anyway... the winner of the original hat will be picked tomorrow and, as the competitions seem to be going down well, I think I'll keep running them as and when there is something in the show that can be given away. Next week, there is. It'll be a pullover. I can't say more than that without it being a spoiler. But you'll know it when you see it.





If you want to be in with a chance of winning the pullover... you'll need to be on my mailing list before Monday - which is when I'll email the question and all the details. You can subscribe here... it will send an email with a link that you need to click on to confirm your subscription... and, um, that's it.















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Of course, I'm incentivised to get people on to my mailing list because I use it to let people know about what I'm up to... but that seems reasonable to me because if I'm giving away one-off items from the series, I'd rather they went to people who are interested in what I'm up to.



Of course I'll email you to let you know about a new book or about updates to the tour and so on... but I also give the mailing list advance notice on free tickets for recordings and cheaper new material nights and things like that. So hopefully, it works for everyone...

Scott Free

This contains spoilers for episode two of Modern Life Is Goodish so if you haven't seen it yet this won't make a lot of sense. Why not go and watch it and come back later.



It won't be repeated again during this run, but it will be on the Dave website for one more day. (Each show disappears from the On Demand service on Tuesday night when the next one is broadcast)



Anyway... I thought I'd write this because I've received a few hundred messages since episode two went out that all relate to the same thing

This, for example:

Susan Scott doesn't watch @DaveGorman's Modern Life Is Goodish on @Join_Dave - http://t.co/6XbyR299f3

— Mark McKean (@WallaceEMann) September 29, 2013

... and also this...

@DaveGorman can I book your look a like for my girlfriends 30th birthday party?

— Leigh (@thegitzilla) September 29, 2013

So it makes sense to me to try and add a bit of clarity.



Basically, a lot of people want to know about my "lookalike". A lot of people have seen that "he" is still on the Susan Scott lookalike agency website and then assumed that means Susan Scott and her staff still don't realise and haven't seen the show.



It seems only fair to them to clear that up.



The production team only found out what was really going on about an hour or two before the recording. At which point, everyone was in a bit of a headspin as they dealt with the fact that the show wasn't going to end in the way they had planned. But there wasn't any time for anger because everyone's focus was all about what we were going to do instead. (From my point of view it wasn't a big concern because seeing their confusion unravel as they realised that what they'd been planning as a surprise for me was actually even more weird and surprising for them was just making me laugh.)



The next day I got a bit of a telling off. But only a bit because we all knew that what had happened was better than what they'd been expecting to happen.





It was a day or two later that I got in touch with the people at Susan Scott Lookalikes. I called to explain and apologise. And I sent them some flowers. And they were brilliant about it. They took the whole thing in good grace - it was only a gentle ribbing after all - and, as I explained in the show, they didn't actually put a foot wrong. They did everything right. It wasn't as if anyone was playing a trick on them.



They really have been absolutely fantastic about the whole thing. And they've left "Martin A" on the site, not out of ignorance, but because they think it's a funny thing to do.



I gather also that a lot of people have contacted them and asked about booking Martin A. The truth is that if a booking had come in before the show had been broadcast I probably would have done it. Because being my own lookalike for punters who didn't know it was me would have made me laugh. But of course that didn't happen because of course there is no market for a me-lookalike. That would be preposterous.



But, now that the show's been broadcast, and the only people who are going to try and book him know that he's me... and they're contacting an agent who knows that it's me and, of course, I know that it's me too (I'm clever like that) there's not really anything to be gained by going through with it.



So despite his presence on the site, you'll find that Martin A has suddenly become strangely unavailable. After all, I can't afford to undercut
myself by that much.

Getting Straight To The (Power) Point

So... this is a thing. The dates aren't until next year. I know! I suppose I could have toured this year but only with material from the new TV series and I don't think it's on to charge money for tickets to see something you can see free on the box. A tour should contain new stuff.



So, with a few other commitments to look out for, 2014 it is.



The tickets are available for pre-sale from See Tickets except for the Dublin show - those are available through TicketMaster.ie



I've already been answering questions on Twitter so I hope it won't seem presumptuous to try and head a couple off at the pass.

1: I don't book venues, they book me. If I'm not playing near you, it's not because I chose to avoid you!

2: That said, there were a couple of venues that wanted the show, but they also wanted to charge the public extortionate booking fees, so I passed.

3: If you can see a venue on the list but it's not showing up on the See Tickets link, check back in an hour or two... I think some of the venue's box offices are taking a  bit longer than planned to make the arrangements with See.

Modern Life Is Surprising

So episode two of the series airs tonight... and there's something in the show that illustrates a point I've been wanting to make for a while about how we made it that answers some of the questions I've been asked a lot in the last week.



If you've read a previous blog about my last tour you'll know that what I do - which involves a lot of found media (screen grabs from websites, magazines, newspapers etc etc) - creates a legal challenge when it comes to filming things. A few people have asked me why we've been able to include certain material in the show given that it would have been impossible to put it in a DVD.



It's complicated, but in essence, with a DVD, if someone wanted to argue the toss legally over me showing something it's possible to end up in a situation where we'd have to pulp all copies of the DVD and delay release until the dispute had been settled and that means that - even if we won a dispute (which we would do) - it would be too costly...



Anyway... I think it's worth saying that the channel (and the production company) have been brilliantly robust about these kind of issues and taken a far more common-sense approach than I've experienced in the past elsewhere.

One of the things that is often frustrating with TV is the idea that they have a process that can be applied to other things. When a comic builds a live show, they do it by going out and trying out material in front of real audiences. People try out new ideas in low(er) pressure gigs where the audience knows that that's the deal. They do preview shows in smaller venues and at cheaper ticket prices while they hone stuff. And all being well, by the time they're on tour with their name above the door so to speak, the show all works. Because it's been engineered that way.

Too often there is an attitude in TV that they can replace that honing process with a series of meetings. That having a round table script discussion with producers and lawyers will help to hone material in the same way that performing it to an audience will. It's nonsensical to me. I like collaborating, I'm not arguing that they should cede everything to control-freak performers, just that micro-managing the details by committee isn't a very helpful way to work. Not for me, anyway.

It's why with this series we did a load of live previews before the recordings. We were trying to do our editing before the taping, not afterwards. I always dislike watching shows that feel like they were made in the edit suite. It meant that we never had a paper script for the show... I don't want to learn a script, I want to see how the words fall out the first time I try to express the idea in front of an audience and then try again tomorrow if it falls out wrong. I find learning a script impedes the part of the brain that is meant to be engaging with the idea and it starts to sound like a recording.

But lawyers like to have scripts. They like to know precisely what is going to be said and are reluctant to offer an opinion about it until they do. And they are always reluctant to offer an opinion anyway. A constant refrain from the making of this series was:
Lawyer: What exactly are you going to say?
Me: I don't know yet. But tell me what exactly I can't say?
Lawyer: It doesn't work like that.


But we got through it.
The material in tonight's episode was previewed in Fareham and in Windsor. So if you came to one of those shows, you saw a rough version of most of what's in the show.



Apart from one bit. One teeny, weeny... but hugely significant bit.

There's one thing in tonight's show which I couldn't discuss on stage in Fareham and in Windsor because it hadn't happened yet. Or at least it hadn't played out. I was keeping a secret from the production team... who thought they were keeping a secret from me. The truth only came out about an hour before the recording.

It couldn't have panned out the way it did if we'd had lawyers demanding scripts in advance. Weirdly, it's the fact that they accepted the idea of honing the stuff live - and without a paper trail of words for them to stay on top of - that meant tonight's show was able to contain the surprise it does.

I've tried to be oblique and spoiler free... but I hope you can catch the show. 10pm. Tonight. On Dave.

Your Mailing List Questions Asked...

Apologies that what follows is a blog post about some boring admin... but I've received a few emails and tweets from people who are concerned that they signed up to the mailing list and haven't yet received an email... and I find it easier to post an explanation here and then point people at it than to try and explain all this in a series of individual replies. If it doesn't apply to you... feel free to move along!

An email was sent out in the early hours of Monday morning so if you're on my mailing list you should have one. If you're on the list and one appears not to have arrived, the first thing I'd recommend would be to check your junk folder. There are about 11,000 people on the mailing list and some servers assume that any email sent to that many people must be spam and treat it accordingly.If it is in your junk folder, I'd suggest putting the domain on a safe list - so that it doesn't get treated as junk in future.



If you're in any doubt as to whether you're on the list or not, here's a way of finding out:







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If you put your email address in here and hit subscribe, your browser should do one of two things. If it recognises your address as already being on the list it will take you to the home page of my website. If it's a new address, it will take you to a page that looks like this:







The double opt in is my way of guaranteeing I can't be accused of sending spam. Only people who get the email and click on the link will then get the mail outs. If at any time you want to unsubscribe, you can just as easily do so in the same way. I can see that in the last week for example, 150 people have tried to subscribe but then not clicked on the link to confirm it. Of course this might be because they decided against it by the time the email came through, or because they entered an incorrect address in the first place or - more likely - it's because the double-opt-in email has been sent to their junk folder and so they simply don't realise that the email has turned up.



I can only send the emails out. I can't do much to influence whether or not your email server recognises it as legit... but you can. If you're on the list but you haven't received the email... then take a look in the junk folder and try adding the domain davegorman.com to a safe list. I promise, I never spam.



That said... if you do want to buy some printer ink get in touch, maybe I can do you a deal.



Oh... and, as well as asking a question about the show as a way of running a Gorscreen competition... the email was also a reminder that episode two of Modern Life Is Goodish goes out tomorrow - Tuesday - at 10pm. So, y'know... there's that.

Do you want a GORSCREEN?

So, the series launched last night and I've been completely blown away by how positive the reaction has been. Thanks everyone. If you didn't catch the show and want to, there's a repeat at 10.40 tonight (Wednesday) and another on Saturday night at 11. And I think it can be viewed on demand on the Dave website for a few days too.



If you haven't seen it, I don't think there's anything that will be spoiled by showing you this picture from the show, featuring the, er... GORSCREEN.







I mentioned on Twitter last night that the props department had given me the GORSCREEN frame after the show and that I might give it away in a competition if people were interested... and some people do seem to be. So I guess I ought to work out a way of doing so.



Sometimes when I see someone running a competition on Twitter (RT this/use this hashtag/that sort of thing) I think it can be a way of encouraging people to spam their followers by filling their timeline with things and I definitely don't want to do that. Nor do I want to do anything that people might mistake for that. And besides, I don't want to exclude people who might follow me on facebook but not on Twitter... or for that matter anyone who does neither of the above.



I also have to think of a way of actually picking a winner. So what I've arrived at is this: a competition for members of my mailing list.


On Monday, I'll email my mailing list a question about episode two in the series.

There'll be a special email address you can send the answers to. On Friday I'll pick a random email from amongst all the right answers. And then I'll send them the GORSCREEN frame. (To be really clear... it's a wooden frame that has a space where you can mount an ipad. Or at least that's what we hung in it. I don't own an ipad. So it really is just the frame. But, y'know... it's quite nicely made!)



Hey, as it's a competition I suppose I ought to have some terms and conditions. Ha ha. Here we go:

To enter the competition, you have to be on my mailing list. I don't want that to put people off. I promise I don't send out loads of emails. I only really use it to let people know when I've got new things happening and I don't store the addresses on my own computer or anything like that. Realistically, I'd rather a prop from the show went to someone who was interested in what I'm doing next than someone who just saw a retweet from their mate one afternoon and sent a reply. That said, it's easy to join and just as easy to leave too. I won't even know you've done it. You can subscribe - or unsubscribe - on this page of my website.

Only one entry per person. Let's not be silly.

If you think you've signed up to the mailing list but the email with the question doesn't turn up... I can't be held responsible for it. I will send the email. Check your spam folder. Did you confirm your subscription? etc etc etc. If an email address bounces back to the list a few times it can end up being deleted from the list also.






Er... well, that should do it. Y'know, allowing for common sense and all that. If you think I've missed anything out, leave a comment on the blog and I'll try and keep on top of it all. (Oo... oo... I know. These terms and conditions are subject to change etc etc etc... they always say that, don't they?)

I really am hugely chuffed by the response to the show, and I hope people will enjoy the other five shows too. If there are other props, objects, souvenirs or what have you that I can think of from those shows... maybe I'll do this again with other, um, prizes.

Big thanks to everyone who tweeted, facebooked and emailed kind words. You're lovely you are.

This Isn't A Humble Brag

... it's a brag brag.



I don't really understand the idea that you'd make a show and then not want people to watch it or coolly not mention it and just hope that people find out about it somehow.



This was in The Times yesterday... on Tuesday's TV page.



I expect the first line will be used as a pull quote.



That said, it occurs to me that you could have those two qualities in equal measure by having none of either as well, but I don't think that's what he means.



At least I hope it isn't.



Have I mentioned the show's on Dave at 10pm on Tuesday?

Answering The Tattoo Question That I'm Asked Daily...

I hadn't really worked out what Vine was for before now... but this seemed as good a way to use it as anything else...



Pssst: the sound toggles on/off in the top left hand corner