Elizabeth Gilbert's Blog, page 47

Grammar lesson of the day (and shit). :) LG

Grammar lesson of the day (and shit).

LG

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Question of the day: WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO WITH YOUR LIFE BEFORE YOU DIE IN 90…

Question of the day: WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO WITH YOUR LIFE BEFORE YOU DIE IN 90 YEARS?

A few years ago, a woman came into Two Buttons, the store that my husband and I run together. She approached my husband, and told him that she was seeking his advice about her life, because he was that guy from EAT PRAY LOVE.

Promptly, my husband tried to talk her out of asking his advice about anything and instead gave her a glass of wine, as he does for everyone who comes into the shop. But she persisted, and he is polite, so he listened.

She said she was thinking about selling her house, downsizing her life, and going traveling. But she wasn't sure. She was afraid to let go of her security, and didn't feel certain that she was meant to be a traveler, and thought she might miss her family if she went off to see the world, but also feared that she might miss out on the adventure of a lifetime if she didn't go off to see the world….etc, etc. She wrapped it up by asking, "What do YOU think I should do?"

My husband, pouring her more wine, said, "Oh, darling, why don't you just relax and do whatever you want with your life? And don't worry if it turns out well or not! Who cares? After all, you're going to be dead in 90 years, anyway, so it doesn't really matter, right? You might as well live exactly the way you want to live right now!"

First of all, this sort of bluntness is why I don't necessarily recommend that people come into my husband's shop and ask him for serious advice about their lives…

Secondly, the woman misheard him. When he said, "You'll be dead in 90 years," she thought he said, "You'll be dead in 9 years", and she panicked in horror. "You're telling me I'll be dead in 9 years???!" she said. "How do you know that? Do you see it in my aura? How will I die? Oh my god, this is awful! I'm only 47 years old! I don't even smoke! How could you say such a thing? You don't even know me!"

So that didn't go well.

I winced when my husband told me this story. But then later I thought that maybe it hadn't been such terrible advice…?

I think sometimes we forget that we are merely temporary visitors to earth, temporary occupants of these bodies. We take our lives perhaps too seriously sometimes when we forget our ultimate destination (whether it's 90 years or 9 years, after all, eventually we will all be leaving this party). When we forget our essential transience — when we think that we're going to be here forever — all of our choices become so weighty, so significant, so intimidating…but we won't be here forever. So maybe it doesn't really matter as much as we think it matters? Maybe you can be a bit lighter about your choices, that being the case?

So what do you want to do before you go? What would be interesting to you? What would bring you enjoyment, or elevation, or transcendence? And what's to be lost, really, in giving new things a try?

We're just passing through life. Might as well check it out a bit while we're here, right?

As for me, I wanted to see some of life from the top of an elephant, so — when I was traveling in India —I did it. I'm glad I did it. It was amazing. I have a bunch of other stuff I want to do before I die, too. But I found this elephant picture this morning and it reminded me of my husband's encounter with that woman, and the beautiful, liberating temporariness of our lives, and the joy of opening yourself to the new and unfamiliar…and thus: THIS STORY.

Have a beautiful day,
LG

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THE SIGNATURE OF ALL THINGS in Singapore…and a beautiful message. Thank you fo…

THE SIGNATURE OF ALL THINGS in Singapore…and a beautiful message. Thank you for traveling with me, Nivedita!

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Traveling with Alma Whittacker in my lunchtime, on the bus to work, on the bus from work, in the tube, and every spare minute everywhere. Right now Alma Whittacker is in my hands in a busy Singapore tube station. But I am with her in Tahiti, Philadelphia, in Peru with Henry, in Amsterdam, in every foot step she walks, in every boat she steps on, in every question she poses – I walk out of my world and into hers. Frankly, this photo might not be the most seductive place that you have ever encountered this wonderful book (no beaches in France , no gardens in Canada) … but nonetheless. I am glad it made it all the way to my hands and needy soul in Singapore. Thank you Liz for this masterpiece! #TheSignatureOfallThings — in Singapore, Singapore.

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The British edition of THE SIGNATURE OF ALL THINGS reaches Zurich…

The British edition of THE SIGNATURE OF ALL THINGS reaches Zurich…

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slow living with Alma near Zurich, Switzerland

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THIS is a first! A restored piece of furniture, inspired by (and named after) Al…

THIS is a first! A restored piece of furniture, inspired by (and named after) Alma Whittaker! Oh, how I love the way inspiration spirals about the world!

Timeline Photos
Lottie, the devil, fat Bertha, my own personal everest. I've called this chair many things in it's resurrection, but ultimately her name is Alma, after pioneering moss botanist alma whittaker. #timorousbeasties #warwickfabricsaustralia #vintagevelvet

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THE SIGNATURE OF ALL THINGS in Russian!

THE SIGNATURE OF ALL THINGS in Russian!

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Hello from Russia

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Good morning! Here’s a link to an interview that appeared in this week’s Entert…

Good morning!

Here's a link to an interview that appeared in this week's Entertainment Weekly, where I got to talk about BOOKS.

I hope you enjoy it!

Heart,
LG

Elizabeth Gilbert: The Books of My Life | EW.com
shelf-life.ew.com
To celebrate the paperback publication of her triumphant return to fiction, The Signature of All Things, Elizabeth Gilbert, author or Eat, Pray, Love, talked to…

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THE SIGNATURE OF ALL THINGS backstage at the Commonwealth Games…what was your…

THE SIGNATURE OF ALL THINGS backstage at the Commonwealth Games…what was your role there, Donna? Dying of curiosity!

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Backstage at the Glasgow 2014 Commonwealth Games, nervous before the Opening Ceremony Show. SOAT is keeping my nerves down. Thank you Liz

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THE SIGNATURE OF ALL THINGS in a beautiful, quiet corner of Maine…

THE SIGNATURE OF ALL THINGS in a beautiful, quiet corner of Maine…

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It's nap time for the kids… There's a nice warm breeze today, perfect for the wind chimes and a lovely book… in Maine. x

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QUESTION OF THE DAY: HOW DO YOU COPE WITH CRITICISM? A reader asked me this que…

QUESTION OF THE DAY: HOW DO YOU COPE WITH CRITICISM?

A reader asked me this question today, and I thought I would re-post what I wrote about this last year… hope it's helpful!

Also, I want to open up this question for a general discussion — so by all means, please share your own thoughts and wisdom on the subject, OK?

As for me, it depends on whether the criticism is professional or personal.

I have a much thicker skin when it comes to professional criticism than personal criticism. I've always understood that it's impossible (and perhaps even unfair) to put something out in the world without allowing other people to have opinions about it. If I get to speak publicly, in other words, then they get to speak publicly, too. Sometimes people's reaction to my work will be warm, sometimes it will be ambivalent, sometimes it will be dismissive, sometimes it will be positively hateful. And thanks to the magic of the Internet, I CAN FIND OUT WHAT EVERYONE IN THE WORLD THINKS OF ME AT ANY TIME OF DAY! (Which you must never do, by the way, unless you are deeply invested in making yourself terribly unhappy.)

I keep on doing my work, anyhow despite criticism. And I've been on the business end of some really majestic denigration over the years, too. Especially after "Eat Pray Love". But I keep writing. I do my work not from a place of "I'll show those bastards!" but from a personal certainty that I have a job to do, and that I must stick with it. We all have a job in life; writing books happens to mine. It's nothing personal; it's just true. Whatever happens to those books after I publish them is none of my business. People can jump up and down on my books all day, but I still have to make the things. Also, I know this: My critics will write their angry words about me, publish those angry words, tuck their children into bed, have a glass of wine, watch TV and go to sleep…and then never really think about me again. So I shouldn't dwell on them, either. It's just an inhale and an exhale — a natural part of the human process — and then it's done.

Lastly, as I alway say, "If people don't like what I've written, they can go write their own f**king books."

Thus: ONWARD.

As for personal criticism, though? That's harder. The more intimately I know and love you, the more your criticism will hurt me — and the worse my reaction will be to it, I am sorry to say. If you are a loved one of mine, your criticism will sometimes shut me down, sometimes it will enrage me, sometimes it will make me close my heart to you, sometimes it will cause me to rush to my own defense — perhaps even hysterically and irrationally. I wish to do better in this regard, and I'm always looking to learn how.

My best teacher of recent years has been my friend Rayya Elias (Elizabeth Gilbert - The Official Website | ElizabethGilbert.com.