Kyle Michel Sullivan's Blog: https://www.myirishnovel.com/, page 254

Une autre de Billy Wilder...

I put this here because I want to watch it later; it's an hour long.

Writing is very hard work, and having done both writing and directing, I tell you that directing is a pleasure and writing is a drag. Directing can become difficult, but it is a pleasure because you have something to work with. You can put the camera here or there, you can interpret the scene this way or that way, the readings can be such or such. But writing is just an empty page—you start with absolutely nothing. I think writers are vastly underrated and underpaid. It’s totally impossible to make a great picture out of a lousy script. It’s impossible, though, for a mediocre director to completely screw up a great script. –Billy Wilder

"Sunset Boulevard", c'est moi? Je ne sais pas...mais...

It's from 2002 and has German subtitles, but it's fascinating to watch and learn about a Hollywood masterpiece.

Lovely inspiration...

I have to share this, it's so wonderful...
...and gives me ideas about Jake, since he refers to himself as a wolf.

Rearranging the dirt...

The nice thing about a catastrophe is...well, not to be all Pollyanna and crap, but you have to rebuild. Ruined structures get torn down and new ones, stronger ones, go up in their place. Hopefully. Anyway, I've already begun the clearing away for new foundations.

For example, I just learned that the administration building that housed the Indio branch of the Riverside County DA's office is being razed to make way for a newer, larger jail. The offices in there have been moved temporarily to Palm Desert, a good 10 miles away. Which led me to other aspects of the story that were outdated and incorrect.

Like how, in the attempt to make Owen a wonderful guy, I was ignoring the reality of Palm Springs -- that it's nearly half-gay, skews older than average, and many of them are supporters of the GOP...even with its fanatical anti-gay attitudes. I knew a couple of Log Cabin Republicans, and while they were nice-enough people, nothing really mattered to them except that vile party's tax-cut policies, because nothing else really affected them.

So a lot has to be adjusted. The push of the story is still good, but more research is needed to make certain I'm still grounded in truth instead of a Hollywood-dream-style community caught in a fag's fantasy. I even read up more on the Warm Springs sting of 2009 that resulted in 19 men being entrapped and arrested for "indecent exposure." That crime requires a jail sentence and registry as a sex offender, and the DA at the time pushed to try all of them for that crime instead of the lesser "public indecency."

That caused a huge uproar in the gay community, and they pushed back, pointing out that straight couples get a pass despite numerous complaints of straight sex in parking lots while gay men get targeted even though no one actually lodged a complaint. The Palm Springs Chief of Police wound up having to resign (after it was found he used disparaging language against gay men) and the Riverside DA got kicked out, to his shock.
I think David Mason Chlopecki's photo was taken in Palm Springs, to give you an idea of what the place can be like.
Problem is, that DA was replaced by another Republican, who then pushed through the charges in spite of having received massive gay support. It also exposed a rift in the community between those who appreciated how the gay community had saved Palm Springs from becoming a nothing desert community and those who felt the fags were being bullies and tossing their weight around.

Final story is, 16 of those 19 men now have criminal histories (3 had the charges dropped) and that DA's en route to his second term. Even after having been caught destroying the political signs of his opponent. And yet, there are still gay men who support Republicans.

Talk about self-loathing queens.

Inspiration needed...

This is Alex Minsky, whom I've mentioned in my blog, before. He was nearly killed in Afghanistan by an IED, and did lose his right leg. He spiraled into despair and alcoholism, but turned his life around and is now a model and fitness guru. He's still in his mid-20s.

I'm making shameless use of him, right now, not because he has a beautiful smile but because I need something to kick me in the ass and keep me going on OT. If he can overcome that hideous experience, I can overcome the chaos in my feeble brain.

A problem I've been ignoring...and which this mess has finally forced me to admit to...is I've been pulling back on the truth of my characters, too much. Mainly because of the vicious reaction I've gotten from some of my earlier works. Well fuck that. Kitty just got whipped, bringing out my inner Tasmanian Devil, and Tas don't take shit off nobody.

Be warned.

And FWIW, this is how Alex proudly stands:

Better now than never, I guess

This was a nice little personal earthquake. Just a 7.8 on the Richter Scale. Smoldering ruins abound but so far I'm able to stand up and walk out of the chaos. I think. The sudden collapse of OT shook me up...but I'm too vested in the story to just toss it aside. So on Saturday, I'm going back to page 1 and stripping out everything that no longer works. Guess it's better to know now than after I'd sent it out for feedback.

I'm pretty fucking pissed about this. And my self-confidence is down around my knees. And all it took was one comment from one character to set the destruction going, like a massive line of dominoes lined up for miles. Thanks a lot, guys; all that work and I'm back to the beginning.

I still don't know what the hell happened. It may have been me trying to shoehorn in some ideas that just weren't right for the story. Like Owen insisting on defending himself at his trial for public indecency, when he knows a damn good lawyer who will take the case and do it right. Something I mention more than once as regards that lawyer with other characters.

Or maybe it's how I'm trying to find ways to tie Jake's growing uncertainty about Antony in with the anti-gay push by newcomers to the area. Or maybe it's just plain setting this in Palm Springs. Or maybe I was being too damned coy with the real reason for what's going on and got so damned coy, I lost sight of the narrative reality.

I don't know. I just know that right now my head aches and I'm damn near ready to give up on the whole stupid idea of writing. I don't know why this story is causing me such turmoil...or why it's become such a devil to deal with. It's just a mystery story. Shit.

And that may be the problem...it's really more than that and I'm denigrating it by suggesting I'm writing something like Earl Stanley Gardner's Perry Mason books. I'm not. I'm writing a story about a man coming to terms with the truth of himself. That's what the final chapter was always about -- Jake accepting his own horrifying reality...and how it nearly destroyed him...and could, still...

I don't know if I can handle that...

Here we go again...

One of the major plot points of The Vanishing of Owen Taylor turned out to be a worm that just collapsed the story around me...and as of now, I have no idea how to get around it. I've gone blank. Setting the story in Palm Springs doesn't work. At all. But it's so intrinsically a part of the story, I have to change the entire premise to keep it there. The whole reason for everything to be happening. Which means a page one rewrite.

Shit.

Excuse me while I do a crash and burn...

Families keep mattering

I got through another chapter of OT, tonight, and would have done more but family interfered. Gotta love it. 1600 miles means nothing when you have cell phones and need to kick some butt.

I'm going to Hong Kong, again, just before Thanksgiving, so I may not be able to do the NaNoWriMo challenge to write a book in 30 days. Which I do want to do, this time. It'll get me going on reworking A65 or CK or something into a book and set in stone what I want the story to say. I'm still aiming at doing it for A65 because I think it would be perfect as a nice summer read. Plus I know people in the book business who might be willing to give me feedback on it...especially the British ones.

I finished reading Sol Saks' book on comedy writing that really isn't so much about comedy writing as writing in general. I wasn't too impressed except I found out he was one of the originators of Bewitched  and wrote the pilot. His book's more a self-confidence builder than anything else...which works for me.

Hell, anything works for me, right now...

I am NOT "Ready for Hillary"

I made the mistake of donating to a couple of individual Democrats' races for Senate and The House of Representatives, and now I'm on every goddamned mailing list there is from the Democratic party, not only begging me for money because it's our last chance to counter that idiot, Boehner, but because I'm told I'm ready for Hillary Clinton to run for president.

Well...I don't want her. And I told the DNC that, as well as a few others. Do you think they listened? No. The begging only increased. So now they all go into Junk, and I'l be damned if I give them another penny, even if I agree with the person running.

I had this problem once with the GOP. A guy at work, who's a die-hard Republican, sent my name and information in to them with a small donation, so suddenly I was getting inundated with requests for money from CREEP. At my work address! They wouldn't stop when I asked them to...or when I demanded they stop...so I started sending them really nasty Photoshopped images of Bush 2 doing S&M with American men dressed as soldiers, telling them they'd better remove my name from their mailing list or I'd get even nastier. I'd discovered what all could be found on the Internet and made serious use of it. So the mailings finally ceased.

As for Hillary, I hate it when someone is anointed the nominee without me even being given the chance to vote on it. And I wouldn't vote for her, anyway; I don't trust her. I'd rather Elizabeth Warren run, or Al Franken. They know what they're talking about and aren't afraid to say it. Ms. Clinton is nothing but political speech and bullshit.

But I won't pull the same stunt with them as I did CREEP. I'll just dump my junk mail, because I'm still closer to the Democratic line than anything else. But if those bastards do push Hillary's nomination through without so much as a question, I'll vote Green, again. I will not vote for the lesser of two evils, anymore.

That's what got us Obama and his continuation of Bush 2's policies.

This time the charm?

I re-started my edit of The Vanishing of Owen Taylor from the beginning and slashed my way through 5 chapters. Some bits needed to be cut completely, some needed to be changed around, some just wanted a bit more clarification...and this time I rushed nothing. I want my current draft to be ready to read, for feedback.

I was also in discussion with Jake about who to make the final villain, and he's finally on the same page as me...or else, I am with him. I never know, anymore. But it's his story so I need to listen...and he led me to an interesting commentary...or tale.

There's a story about a caliph who asked Maimonides, a Jewish scholar, to explain the Talmud. We're talking about volumes and volumes of rules about religious morals and behaviors and conduct and philosophy as regards Judaism, and do it in the time he was able to stand on one foot. This was in the Middle Ages, in what is now Spain but was then controlled by the Moors. Maimonides responded,  "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. All the rest is commentary."

That's probably the best way to view writing possible -- keep the core of what you mean, remember the rest is commentary.